start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1405121655 | 1405180731 | t3_2agxtk | t5_2to41 | 352 | [deleted]: TIFU by losing all dignity in the shower in front of my wife.
"This is what a Friday is supposed to feel like," I think to myself. "It's the end of the week, the sun is shining, work went well, and I've already gotten a 3 mile run in."
"Hey honey, you want to grab a quick shower?" You see, she had just wo... | 6 | 58.666667 | |
1405123993 | 1405133559 | t3_2ah1bn | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU my $500 guitar
I'm really not proud of this one.
I'm in the process of refinishing my favorite guitar. For those of you who are guitar players, it's a Carvin stratocaster that arrived as a kit; I painted and assembled it myself in high school. For those of you who don't, it cost me $500 and a lot of e... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1405123099 | 1405250046 | t3_2ah00b | t5_2to41 | 268 | [deleted]: TIFU by forgetting that I was doing the dishes.
Last night I made extremely cheesy pizza and it got all over the pan. I thought to myself "Hey, I'll clean this tomorrow."
Well crusty cheese is super boring, so I put the sink plug in and turned it on. You know, let the pan soak so it'll be easier to clean.
... | 8 | 33.5 | |
1405125439 | 1405128173 | t3_2ah2s0 | t5_2to41 | 7 | Iammadrightnow: TIFU by wanking at 3:00 am. NSFW
This happened an hour ago....I hate this but...you will probably enjoy my pain.
I just came back from Germany ( tourism ) and I arrived at about 11:00 pm, so I proceed to greet all my family members and we have a good time together. At about 1:00 am, everyone was asleep,... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1405125376 | 1405126808 | t3_2ah2q2 | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU By saying "I love you"
So if you're familiar with the kik app it's like the default messager except a little better (outside of not being able to send videos but whatever).
I was talking to my girlfriend of almost a year (the story isn't about me saying it too early, we say I love you all the time) and... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1405120897 | 1405134247 | t3_2agwq1 | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by Trying to Chill Warm Soda
Teotwawki69: For future reference, if you want to chill a soda (or any canned or bottled beverage) quickly, wrap it in a wet paper towel and put it in the freezer for about fifteen minutes. No nasty residue, no lukewarm drink.
Volatilize: That was my option #2. This scenar... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1405126910 | 1405149581 | t3_2ah4ti | t5_2to41 | 82 | Jesus_Shaves_: TIFU By masturbating with soap
So I was closing up shop at my job this evening when I got to feeling a little frisky. Keep in mind that I am in an isolated area and after a certain time I have complete privacy behind locked doors. It's a moderately successful restaurant.
So I was feeling the vibe and ... | 6 | 13.666667 | |
1405127744 | 1405128162 | t3_2ah5y7 | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by making my mom cry
So my single mom explained to me that we are a low income family and she is struggling to find a job to support us. She was upset for the whole conversation because she said she was trying her hardest and she didn't want life to be this way. I was kind of upset as well so I went to ... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1405127188 | 1405334472 | t3_2ah56p | t5_2to41 | 171 | [deleted]: TIFU by asking a little girl with no arms, "Where are your arms"?
So I work at a trampoline park and we had a kids summer camp come in to jump for a few hours so we knew it was going to be packed, little did I know the dipshit in me was going to come out that day.
Fast forward an hour and the crowd of kids... | 14 | 12.214286 | |
1405128398 | 1405139376 | t3_2ah6tc | t5_2to41 | 72 | guarayos: TIFU by drinking an entire bottle of cannabis tincture
A couple years ago I was experimenting with cannabis tinctures by soaking my old pot in Bacardi 151 for a few weeks. I finished that first big batch by draining the liquid from the solid matter. I wondered whether there might be any cannabinoids left in t... | 6 | 12 | |
1405129826 | 1405330877 | t3_2ah8t0 | t5_2to41 | 2,151 | buttlerrrr: TIFU by having sex in my boyfriends jacuzzi [NSFW]
This Sunday after we had a couple of friends over to my boyfriends parents house, he and I decided to get a little frisky in the jacooz, brought along lube and I'm on the pill so I didn't think I had much to worry about. I mean obviously at the time it was ... | 22 | 97.772727 | |
1405130295 | 1405180281 | t3_2ah9ed | t5_2to41 | 48 | sparkywilly: TIFU by telling a man he will end up in my bed.
As usual, 7 years ago...
At 20 years of age I was quite the angry fellow. Thought the world owed me and no one could match my intelligence. Anyhow, I was driving home from work in a pickup truck and there was traffic, of course. The guy behind me was in a je... | 4 | 12 | |
1405128291 | 1405132176 | t3_2ah6oe | t5_2to41 | 4 | Krazedmigit: Tifu by kicking a punching bag
So last year i bought a punching bag to blow of steam when im mad. It helps a lot actually. When im mad I just swing away then im to tired to do anything else.
Anyway, so today im just walking through my living room after playing some LoL (leesin jungle like a pro). I see ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1405131906 | 1405132717 | t3_2ahbiq | t5_2to41 | 20 | 1337cereal: TIFU by saying "fuck you" to a random stranger
This literally happened today.
I woke up at around 11 today and I was a little groggy and irritable. First thing I hear from my mom is that my brother wants to go to wal-mart and old navy to go buy some stuff, and wants me to drive him there. So right there I'm... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1405134444 | 1405136435 | t3_2ahevn | t5_2to41 | 7 | alexd281: TIFU by brushing my teeth with something that wasn't toothpaste
Grabbed what I thought was [toothpaste](http://i.imgur.com/1iIEYzH.jpg) in a dark cabinet. I'm an idiot.
pandwphotography: Hope, for your sake, it wasn't Preparation H cream.
alexd281: Thankfully, not. Cortisone 10 has a similar color scheme to ... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1405134387 | 1405135367 | t3_2ahesj | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU By telling the truth
I'm sorry, this one's kinda' sad, unlike all of the other amazing hilarious stories in this sub.
The story starts when I shot my boyfriend an e-mail so we could chat. Since I'm awful with conversations I asked a question "What would you're parents be most surprised to find out abou... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1405136792 | 1405175234 | t3_2ahhnu | t5_2to41 | 286 | lemniscateoo: TIFU by introducing myself to a co-worker who was mid-poop
I work as a camp counselor at a camp upstate. I'm a returning staff member this year, and I arrived at camp for staff training an hour or two early, so not many staff members were there. I asked my director when the international staff members wou... | 3 | 95.333333 | |
1405136297 | 1405144072 | t3_2ahh1s | t5_2to41 | 12 | _maraxus_: TIFU by eavesdropping on the phone...
Today I was getting some much needed sleep when suddenly my grandfather(he lives at my place but doesn't have a key) starts calling meoutside my window to open the door... at 5am.
I went to bed late last night and was really tired but I woke up and opened the door and ... | 5 | 2.4 | |
1405133920 | 1405139052 | t3_2ahe6b | t5_2to41 | 17 | DiscoDanTheDiscoMan: TIFU by trying to help my Grandpa
My grandpa loves family history and so he had someone he knew get all his old family photos (most of them still on film) developed, scanned and put onto a portable hard drive. With every photo on the hard drive, he got rid of the original photos as they were just t... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1405130130 | 1405213325 | t3_2ah96e | t5_2to41 | 11 | Notanyonefamous: Tifu by noticing a hot coworker
Kind of an old one for me (two years). It was my first week at my new job and absolutely loved the amount of beautiful women I was going to be working with. And that started a crappy work relationship.
I was in the middle of running like a mad man working on some equip... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1405141781 | 1405929375 | t3_2ahnnn | t5_2to41 | 81 | maddrb: Tifu by waking my wife at 3am by farting and stinking her out of the room.
3am and all was well. I was 2 hours into the four hours of sleep I had planned tonight. I drifted out of slumber into that dangerous zone where awareness is working, but judgement isn't. I felt a pressure deep down below and realized w... | 6 | 13.5 | |
1405141174 | 1405142727 | t3_2ahmz3 | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU today i texted my exes mom
**tldr texted exes mom to get something back, apologized for being a giant douche, wound up discovering that i still have feelings for ex i just buried those feelings and now they are all back, and ex may have feelings for me, but there are trust issues too ahhhhh!!**
ik its ... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1405142217 | 1405143534 | t3_2aho6x | t5_2to41 | 27 | jzs007a7: TIFU by texting while getting head
So this happened almost a year ago and seeing all of these other TIFU's I decided I might as well share
So me and my girlfriend had been dating for a while and we were really wanting to start taking our relationship a step further. One day me and my friends were hanging out... | 4 | 6.75 | |
1405141248 | 1405162119 | t3_2ahn27 | t5_2to41 | 3 | dockersshoes: Tifu by thinking a girl was a prostitute
Last night a friend and I were meeting a mutual friend at her house in Manila. Now, any white male that has been to the Philippines can attest to the fact that prostitutes are a dime a dozen and shop themselves fairly aggressively. Anyway, we get out of the taxi an... | 3 | 1 | |
1405143440 | 1405159751 | t3_2ahpi2 | t5_2to41 | 37 | BeerWithDinner: TIFU by telling a kid in my shop that I would rather hang myself than listen to him play another Skynyrd song
Kid was in my guitar shop with his brother (which I did not know at the time) and they both were playing Lynyrd Skynyrd songs note for note, for about 45 minutes. These kids had the songs down, ... | 5 | 7.4 | |
1405143881 | 1405145064 | t3_2ahpxm | t5_2to41 | 6 | gallopinggoose: TIFU by leaving my freezer door open.
There was a minor accident at my home today while I was out for an hour. It involved me leaving the freezer door open, homemade ice cream in a Pirex glass bowl falling out and shattering into exactly 6,000 pieces, and my robotic vacuum cleaner trying to clean it up.... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1405145561 | 1405148560 | t3_2ahrm9 | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by hitting an old lady with my shopping cart
Today I went grocery shopping and this little old lady was driving around in a motorized shopping scooter at full speed and I came out from and isle and she just zoomed right in front of me like a damn train that came out of nowhere and BANG! I t-boned her. S... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1405140468 | 1405171254 | t3_2ahm6i | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by wearing an alien mask
This actually happened two years ago but I just found this subreddit and it was the first story I thought of.
Obligatory background information: I was a varsity soccer player at my high school in my junior year. We were having a good year for the first time in a long while (lik... | 3 | 2 | |
1405150996 | 1405156494 | t3_2ahw6i | t5_2to41 | 17 | trggrhppyjulian: TIFU by using 68,000 dollars worth of data roaming and almost getting my mum fired
My sister, mum and i took 10 days to explore Europe and check out universities for my sister and i to go to next year. Anyshit my sister and i being completely addicted to the internet would literally go cold turkey with... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1405153668 | 1405154423 | t3_2ahy22 | t5_2to41 | 1 | [deleted]: TIFU By making the girl I had a crush on very sad
TIFU, or so I think. This technically happened yesterday but that was only a couple of hours ago considering I am writing this at about 1am. Okay into the fuck up.
I currently am a 17 year old(m) soon to be junior (11th grade for anyone that doesn't know) a... | 3 | 0.333333 | |
1405156361 | 1405156823 | t3_2ahzw9 | t5_2to41 | 11 | aceinthehole45: TIFU by accidentally stabbing myself in the hip
This actually happened about 24 hours ago, but I've been in the trauma unit and haven't had access to my phone. Anyway, I was in my room sitting at the computer, watching Dexter. I was also absentmindedly playing with my new knife. I was poking at my hip ... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1405164143 | 1405177014 | t3_2ai53h | t5_2to41 | 6 | iamanretarded: TIFU by drinking and trusting a "friend"
Don't do what I did. Don't.
So the last couple of days have been an entire fuckup for me, I recently flew back in from Melbourne (Australia), after I got off the plane (with little to no sleep, long trip to Melbourne airport from where I was) I decided to get a m... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1405169290 | 1405222616 | t3_2ai92v | t5_2to41 | 16 | Veinix: TIFU by jerking off at night
Oh look at me I'm posting on TIFU today instead of reading of other people fucking up. Yay. This didn't happen today but a week ago, then it wasn't *safe* to post it. Why do you care? You still get a laugh of it.
Some of my nieces and nephews came to visit me (The boy being younger... | 4 | 4 | |
1405170244 | 1405190246 | t3_2ai9x3 | t5_2to41 | 6 | nation2: TIFU-I accidentally swore at a cop and almost got arrested.
So its 1:30 in the morning and I am riding my bike on the sidewalk, when a guy angrily yells out of his car to get on the other side of because I'm going against traffic.He is right but most people do it and the roads and sidewalks are dead at this t... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1405173576 | 1405213772 | t3_2aid4s | t5_2to41 | 97 | [deleted]: TIFU by banging coach's ex-wife...
I play for a Junior hockey team out of Virginia, and I've been seeing this hot older blonde around from time to time. She never acted like she knew anybody, but would occasionally watch some of our practices, which I thought was really weird. One night after practice I was ... | 7 | 13.857143 | |
1405173507 | 1405179887 | t3_2aid1x | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by waking up too early.
As the title says, I fucked up by waking up too early. After a few hours of tossing and turning in the wee hours of this morning due to my legs aching (I have chronic knee pain, usually when I'm trying to sleep.), I finally decided to get my lazy ass out of bed and go into the ki... | 7 | 1.428571 | |
1405194677 | 1405280173 | t3_2aie3k | t5_2to41 | 123 | seabeehusband: Did you not read HE stated HIS balls were dangeling.
Oooch: WOW YOU DONT HAVE TO BE A MAN TO HAVE TESTICLES SHITLORD
statut0ry-ape: [the dictionary says otherwise]( http://www.thefreedictionary.com/_/dict.aspx?rd=1&word=testicle)
Oooch: Using the dictionary as an answer for complicated gender-identi... | 18 | 6.833333 | |
1405175658 | 1414254995 | t3_2aifbg | t5_2to41 | 788 | saviorlito: TIFU By posting a TIFU from work.
So, recently I posted a TIFU by calling my g/f from my work phone, which can be found [here](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2a6kvd/tifu_by_calling_my_gf_from_my_work_phone/).
I thought for sure I would be fired. For sure! I was brought into the office on Friday. As ... | 8 | 98.5 | |
1405192294 | 1405217149 | t3_2aiife | t5_2to41 | 27 | A_Literal_Dog: 1) That's just two different types of dwarfism, and "midget" is perjorative regardless.
2) How would you know what type of dwarfism she has?
3) Yeah, OP still acted like an asshole here. At least we can agree on that.
killcast: I was also confused as to what in my story indicated she was a midget or dwa... | 6 | 4.5 | |
1405176924 | 1405342829 | t3_2aigr2 | t5_2to41 | 12 | BindweedHawkmoth: TIFU on a Psych Ward, Twice.
Short backstory: I'm no stranger to the UK's mental health system, having been a patient for eight years, and I've always been very open and honest about it. There is no mental health joke too offensive for me, and I sometimes forget that isn't so for others (I try and ton... | 5 | 2.4 | |
1405179275 | 1405234917 | t3_2aijr4 | t5_2to41 | 30 | [deleted]: TIFU by sending angry messages to my girlfriend's phone
So last night, my girlfriend and I got into a pretty heated argument over the phone. She ended up hanging up on me and ignoring all my calls. So in the moment I was pretty mad at her and I decided well if I can't talk to her about over the phone, I wil... | 6 | 5 | |
1405175573 | 1405189591 | t3_2aif86 | t5_2to41 | 0 | [deleted]: TIFU by smoking a doobie and cheating on my GF with an orange
Today we went to a folk festival at a park downtown. We were sitting about mid-field in the hot sun and I got up to take a whiz. At the port-a-potties I ran into a buddy and he said, "Wanna smoke a spliff?"
We wandered out behind the stinkeroos a... | 4 | 0 | |
1405180432 | 1405181641 | t3_2ailbn | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by doing three whole marijuanas
Last night I had a pot cookie from my local dispensary. I've had these things a few times before, so I knew more or less what I was getting into. They take forever to kick in, at least an hour sometimes more, but they're super strong once they do.
I walked home and figur... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1405181307 | 1405258802 | t3_2aif2d | t5_2to41 | 24 | Future_Sequence: Oh look, it's you again. Let me just take the time to do this.
> Rule 1: All titles must start with "TIFU". However, **your fuck-up doesn't need to be from today.**
jamesandlily_forever: What did it say?
Future_Sequence: > Today. I fucked up. Today.
It was a troll who just posted that on every ... | 6 | 4 | |
1405184948 | 1405191030 | t3_2airh7 | t5_2to41 | 3 | a_throwaway_a_day_: TIFU by deciding to sleep in the basement for a change
Yeah, yeah, this wasn't today, but rather a few weeks ago. Now that that's out of the way, here goes:
It was really hot in my area this year during the first few weeks of summer. Hot on the main floor, and super hot on the second floor, where a... | 3 | 1 | |
1405175106 | 1405188378 | t3_2aieoi | t5_2to41 | 3 | BendingRobot: TIFU by getting upset at my kids and slamming the patio door.
Stayed up too late playing video games last night. Not my kids fault. Of course they get up early today after having to wake them up all week to go to childcare. Having a peaceful morning, watching a movie, monkey bread, I dosed off in the L... | 3 | 1 | |
1405185328 | 1405324733 | t3_2ais0q | t5_2to41 | 402 | mushroomfather: TIFU by laughing
I've had diarrhea for the last six days. I haven't been able to trust a fart the whole time. Whenever I feel the pressure in my stomach, and that little poke at my hole, I have to run to the bathroom. I have pee-butt. You know, where you poop, but it's actually just fluid flowing out.
... | 9 | 44.666667 | |
1405185553 | 1405272786 | t3_2aisc9 | t5_2to41 | 20 | bournestunna: TIFU by driving my dads car carelessly
Context: I'm a 16 year old who just got his license after a lot of strife of parents not trusting me to drive, not thinking i was ready etc. I don't have a car of my own but my dad has a 2013 nissan altima.
So today my dad finally gives me a chance to prove myself a... | 4 | 5 | |
1405187468 | 1405229851 | t3_2aiuw1 | t5_2to41 | 65 | NiggasOnIce: TIFU by having an erection while answering the door
So this happened last night but I was sitting on my couch wearing just shorts watching some tv. Well all of a sudden I get this itch on my balls and when I went to scratch it, it apparently aroused me.
So now I'm sitting on my couch pitching a tent, whe... | 5 | 13 | |
1405186758 | 1405202365 | t3_2aitwi | t5_2to41 | -1 | [deleted]: TIFU by butt dialing my mom drunk
For some context, This happened when I was in high school, and I had just had my first drinking experience.
It was over at a girls house, and immediately upper class men began showing up. I was pretty intimidated, because these were like popular upperclassmen, guys people k... | 3 | -0.333333 | |
1405189042 | 1405203189 | t3_2aix5c | t5_2to41 | 9 | roxys4effy: TIFU by depositing money
Ok reddit. I fucked up really bad. I pay my mom 150 a month for rent and my cell phone. This month I took it upon myself to just deposit it into her account for her because she really needed it and I was already out. So I pull my money out. Go to her credit union and deposit it.
... | 6 | 1.5 | |
1405188640 | 1405192517 | t3_2aiwkk | t5_2to41 | 27 | curlyelmo: TIFU by licking an outlet
So I wish I could say that I have a reasonable explanation to this story. One in which I am not a complete imbecile. Alas, I cannot.
I was busy making a smoothie, and the lid to my blender is cracked. Sometimes it leaks and will splatter, but I usually clean it up with a rag. Today... | 6 | 4.5 | |
1405188388 | 1405217746 | t3_2aiw6p | t5_2to41 | 402 | Cinemaestro: TIFU By relaxing and watching Louis CK...
So my landlord and a city inspector were set to check out the apartments in my building to make sure they were up to standards. It was the early morning and I didn't know what time they were going to come by my unit. So I roll out of bed and lounge around in my box... | 6 | 67 | |
1405191121 | 1405207178 | t3_2aj05y | t5_2to41 | 18 | NoFlyingSolo: TIFU by stealing shit from a party
Finals were through and through, all came out OK; and this gal (I find her interesting) invited me to a party at her place.
My friends were going, all was going to be sweet... Apparently.
Turns out people brought a lot of drinks, there was quite the number of fellas...... | 6 | 3 | |
1405188808 | 1405204210 | t3_2aiwt4 | t5_2to41 | 6 | Jstencl: TIFU by being mean to a store worker
Just to mention, I am a Czech guy, so my English may not be so good, sorry for potential misspeling. We also use different quotation marks, but I guess it won't be such an issue.
I am on vacation in Denmark, there's some background.
I went to local Bilka store (something... | 8 | 0.75 | |
1405191711 | 1405203408 | t3_2aj11o | t5_2to41 | 28 | LSXS10: TIFU by eating an entire bag of "lava hot" beef jerky
It was actually last night, but I didn't know it would effect me this bad.
Anyway, last night I worked at a local race track handing out college information. I stopped at a local store to grab a drink and some snacks. I saw a bag of lava hot beef jerky, sin... | 5 | 5.6 | |
1405192211 | 1405251147 | t3_2aj1pk | t5_2to41 | 19 | [deleted]: TIFU by buying condoms
For reference, I am a male. Yesterday I walked into CVS in the late afternoon just to get a couple things. It wasn't too busy, but the was a small line of 5 people or so. Being that it was my dads birthday, I wanted to pick up a happy birthday card. I quickly picked the most generic lo... | 4 | 4.75 | |
1405191237 | 1405271017 | t3_2aj0bt | t5_2to41 | 1,722 | page47: TIFU by thinking I blew my ass off [NSFW]
Happened a few years back but thought it was worth a share.
I had gone to the day spa to get my first Brazilian wax, a little nervous since I had a relatively low pain threshold but I had taken an ibuprofen an hour beforehand to lessen the potential shock. Once I arriv... | 9 | 191.333333 | |
1405194441 | 1405198000 | t3_2aj4xh | t5_2to41 | 6 | MoosePuffs: TIFU by drinking whiskey and sharpening knives
You can guess were this is going. Late the other night I was watching netflix and drinking some rye. Maybe a lot of rye. That not being stimulating enough, I decided to get out my tri-angle sharpener and put fresh edges on my kitchen knives while continuing to ... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1405191803 | 1405888025 | t3_2aj160 | t5_2to41 | 2 | TheRealMcCoy95: TIFU By drinking too many beers before getting on a plane.
Before I start this story this tifu unfolded a very long time ago and happened to my father but still a pretty funny fuck up i thought i would share, enjoy!
So my father works for a German car company while he was still a mechanic every year th... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1405196475 | 1405198377 | t3_2aj7o1 | t5_2to41 | 22 | vanityfaer: TIFU: By not buying new shoes sooner.
This tale begins a tad unexpectedly, considering the title. I had to take my cat to the vet. So I pop him in the cat carrier, and head on out. Unfortunately, I had put on a pair of extremely old dolly shoes which, after I was about ten minutes from my flat, started fall... | 3 | 7.333333 | |
1405197628 | 1405200214 | t3_2aj98x | t5_2to41 | 14 | lmnance: TIFU by trying to befriend a disabled man
I was in an elevator going up to the 16th floor of a building in the city which I live. Within the elevator was myself and another man in wheelchair wearing a bowler hat (this is important information). Due to the length of the elevator ride and the fact that it was on... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1405197042 | 1405202315 | t3_2aj8fg | t5_2to41 | 19 | [deleted]: TIFU by smoking weed in Amsterdam, knocking myself out and urinating in public
Me and my two friends recently finished our first year of university and had planned to go traveling around Europe, just as typical students do.
We decided to start in Amsterdam, it was close and an interesting place to quick sta... | 8 | 2.375 | |
1405198877 | 1405199508 | t3_2ajb32 | t5_2to41 | 13 | MrNewyear: TIFU by not proofreading an extra credit essay
So its the day after finals, and our professor gives us the option to watch a 2 hour documentary and write a 3 page discussion essay afterwards for extra credit. In the middle of writing the essay, I make a reference to a university in my home state, and my frie... | 3 | 4.333333 | |
1405185566 | 1405201367 | t3_2aisd4 | t5_2to41 | 27 | dorothy_zbornak_esq: TIFU by not checking the expiration date on the toothpaste
Hey guys, did you know that toothpaste expires? Turns out that it does.
In town visiting my parents. Younger sib and I have been out of the house for a bit now, so they have turned both of our rooms into fancy guest rooms. Personally I thi... | 3 | 9 | |
1405188670 | 1405270755 | t3_2aiwm3 | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by going inside her too aggressively and ripping my frenulum (NSFW)
Before you start reading you have to know that a "frenulum" is the skin that connects the penis head to the foreskin.
So this happened last summer when my GF was alone at her house.
She's my first sexual partner so things weren't flawl... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1405201821 | 1405221227 | t3_2ajfbt | t5_2to41 | 28 | throwaway245825492: TIFU by leaving blood stained panties in my purse. [NSFW?]
Okay, that title made me realize how embarrassing this really is.
I was at work and bam, Mother Nature decided to fuck me over right then and there.
I had cramps earlier in the day, but I thought "oh, must've just be gas."
How wrong I was... | 4 | 7 | |
1405202501 | 1405210867 | t3_2ajgae | t5_2to41 | 128 | bigbadwolf69: TIFU by thinking my little sister was more innocent than she actually is.
So I was hanging out at my friend's house today, we'll call the friend Matt, drinking beer having a good time. (Both of us are in college). Matt's brother, we'll call him Chase also was there. He just graduated from high school. Eve... | 6 | 21.333333 | |
1405200588 | 1405228948 | t3_2ajdlh | t5_2to41 | 277 | BartMaster1234: TIFU by turning into the Ant Kingdom reincarnation of Hitler
One glorious day, on a gloomy July morning, I walked into my bathroom, as I really needed to take a piss. As I frantically hurried, and lifted the toilet seat, I noticed something odd. Something... really odd. Small moving dots. All over the r... | 5 | 55.4 | |
1405204493 | 1405210038 | t3_2ajj7d | t5_2to41 | 101 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling my wife I was craving black models.
My wife was out shopping. I took the kid for a walk and noticed our lime tree was full. I decide to text the wife and tell her I have a craving for Negro Modelo the beer. I Phone decides to autocorrect to "Negro Models". My wife calls me back and screams u... | 5 | 20.2 | |
1405202610 | 1405271698 | t3_2ajgg2 | t5_2to41 | 87 | twotard: TIFU by eating the Chinese food. NSFW
Just to warn you guys; this is a shit story... but it's kind of a unique one.
A couple months ago our University had Chinese food as the visiting restaurant. My roommate advised me to stay away from that Chinese food, but I went for it anyway. Something was immediately of... | 4 | 21.75 | |
1405204484 | 1405206776 | t3_2ajj6t | t5_2to41 | 3 | Guykitty: TIFU by trading computers
Alright so I just want to start off by saying im not a scammer, let me take this by steps
1. We make a deal where i give 50 he shows proof, then i give 100 and when his computer arrives, i send my laptop to him, good deal right not too much to lose for me.
2. He was way more suspici... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1405207271 | 1405212944 | t3_2ajmwu | t5_2to41 | 22 | g102: TIFU three times in a row
God, what a horrible day this was. I decide to do some cleanup on my PC, and inadvertently I delete some data that I need for one of my last exams before graduating. I managed to recover some, but there are more than just a couple of hours of extra work to get back to speed. And the exam... | 3 | 7.333333 | |
1405207334 | 1405229313 | t3_2ajmzs | t5_2to41 | 38 | HotsaucePenis: TIFU by using hot sauce as lube
This actually happened several months ago.
I love spicy food. A lot. Food just isn't good if I can't taste it on its way in and out. I was preparing a pretty standard meal for myself, tofu with assorted veggies and a few different hot peppers & sauce. After I had fini... | 9 | 4.222222 | |
1405207970 | 1405212018 | t3_2ajnu8 | t5_2to41 | 61 | Rapturecat: TIFU by turning down the girl I like.
This happened a couple months ago, where there was this girl that I met back in junior year who I ended up becoming really close to. Over the school year we ended up helping each other out a lot, and ended up becoming best friends. So one night during another late night... | 4 | 15.25 | |
1405208498 | 1405272945 | t3_2ajok3 | t5_2to41 | 79 | Iamthethudner: TIFU by fucking a banana.
So, my family left friday morning to spend the weekend can't remember where, leaving me all by myself in my humble home.
All is going well, I'm just chilling, living the dream playing games all day, watching some Jack Bauer, eating microwave pizza and doing all other kinds of ... | 8 | 9.875 | |
1405208870 | 1405209407 | t3_2ajp35 | t5_2to41 | 5 | Call-me-Clara: TIFU By changing the passcode on my phone
I was letting my aunt and younger brother attempt to figure out the passcode on my phone since we were bored out of my mind. My brother figured it out, so I changed it... And then forgot it. It's locked me out until I can figure out how to fix it from the compute... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1405209909 | 1405250957 | t3_2ajqf1 | t5_2to41 | 8 | superluser: TIFU by joining a dating site that I was not aware was for rich people
This actually happened yesterday, but the horrible realization happened today. I've been struggling with trying to start dating for the first time in my life (I'm 33) for a while now. I am really not satisfied with the way that most da... | 7 | 1.142857 | |
1405209538 | 1405227317 | t3_2ajpwn | t5_2to41 | 71 | vb_designer: TIFU by being drenched in urine, then stripping in front of coworkers
The setting was late last night, after a work meeting. Myself and a female coworker of mine were heading out to the parking lot. Being that my night had been long and dreary, I was in that tired/bored/crazy mood. So when I saw a covered ... | 4 | 17.75 | |
1405212214 | 1405218317 | t3_2ajtdz | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by going in for an awkward parking lot kiss
Ok, like many others this did not happen today, but unfortunately it did happen.
Long story short, on a third date with a guy (I'm female). Things had been going alright, but thus far no kiss or any sort of physical contact besides hugs.
After the date we d... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1405207443 | 1405253288 | t3_2ajn4q | t5_2to41 | 13 | zzswiss: TIFU by jumping out of bed to piss
Again, so like most of these posts, this didn't happen today.
I was in bed with my girlfriend at the time one morning (no longer together, not related to this, i don't think anyway...) and since id just woken up i was dying for a piss. Now generally I'm not the kind of guy t... | 3 | 4.333333 | |
1405213905 | 1405265630 | t3_2ajvkn | t5_2to41 | 85 | devilmadecake: TIFU By Drinking 2 Bottles of Cough Syrup
So this actually happened about 6 years ago... but I feel like telling it.
I had been a druggie for a while. Mostly smoking weed 24/7 and doing hallucinogens every other weekend. I had been out of high school for about 2 years and was working in IT, but wasn't s... | 5 | 17 | |
1405214815 | 1405284792 | t3_2ajwpx | t5_2to41 | 18 | pizzafood2: TIFU by telling my gf to throw a blanket on her face
Today while having sex with my gf she said she was cold. Trying to be helpful, I threw her a blanket while saying, "throw it over your face or something." didn't take too long to realize what had just come out of my mouth
[deleted]: Uhh I don't get it
s... | 12 | 1.5 | |
1405220712 | 1405324610 | t3_2ak41v | t5_2to41 | 16 | hoksab: TIFU By giving my ex child support
I pay my ex by personal check every month and so far no issues. This month she was planning on going out of town on the day I usually give her the checks so I just went ahead a week early and thought I would be nice and write the checks this week and just date them for July 16... | 5 | 3.2 | |
1405220397 | 1405257162 | t3_2ak3n6 | t5_2to41 | 16 | MrFlowa: TIFU by forgetting to switch my phone to silent.
So this happened earlier today and I'm still cringing inside.
Today was the day of my great Aunties wedding. I'm not the type of guy who likes to get dressed up all fancy like but I thought I'd make an effort to look nice so as not to embarrass the rest of my f... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1405220927 | 1405250864 | t3_2ak4bd | t5_2to41 | 18 | Fender6969: TIFU by eating at a sketchy Indian restaurant.
My first TIFU post. This is a poop story, happened last month. The Chinese food story reminded me of that:
I was with my family and I met them at an Indian restaurant and I met up with my friends afterwords. As soon as I got there, I started sweating and I was... | 3 | 6 | |
1405220717 | 1405396829 | t3_2ak423 | t5_2to41 | 13 | catrionaseawolf: TIFU by telling my boyfriend's catholic mother that we did the horizontal hanky panky while she was out (NSFWish)
Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house when his parents decided to go out and see a movie. Normally, he and I don't get a lot of alone time, and being (loud) horny teenagers, we jump o... | 6 | 2.166667 | |
1405221812 | 1405297908 | t3_2ak5f2 | t5_2to41 | 108 | HoovesZimmer: TIFU by pulling a thread from my boxers. Light NSFW?
By the time I finish writing this, the fuck up may or may not have happened today. Anyway, on with the story.
It's Saturday and I had absolutely no work to do, so I decided on being a lazy, fat, vegetable for the day and just milled about in my underwe... | 4 | 27 | |
1405223809 | 1405259303 | t3_2ak7pl | t5_2to41 | 6,673 | sweepminja: TIFU By having cavities filled at the Dentist and popping wood NSFW
This actually happened earlier in the week.
I went to the Dentist Office to have two cavities filled by a super cute brunette dentist. I had just been numbed up with Novocaine and she came back in when I was drooling all over myself. Sh... | 14 | 476.642857 | |
1405224249 | 1405225090 | t3_2ak887 | t5_2to41 | 11 | kolomsg: TIFU by wet dreaming at my gf's parents house
This literally happened in the last 15 minutes (I think).
My girlfriend and I don't get to see each other very often but last night we met up and agreed that I'd stay the night at her parents. Anyway we proceeded to do whatever young couples do until 4am but since ... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1405225156 | 1405591672 | t3_2ak996 | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by ramming a child's face at Walmart.
A couple hours ago I was at Walmart and it was fairly crowded as usual, but I don't really care about that. However some aisles are very close to each other and narrow. Well I was coming out of one turning to my left and a kid about 6 or 7 comes running out and I hi... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1405216847 | 1405257704 | t3_2ajz9i | t5_2to41 | 48 | eclipsedrambler: TIFU- By shooting my friends mom in the boob.
10 year old story, something Ill never live down with my friends, so fucked up its funny.
So I lived with my best friend, his mom and his brother during my senior year of high school. We would pass the evenings along in the basement. Sneaking out to get ... | 4 | 12 | |
1405223755 | 1405310528 | t3_2ak7no | t5_2to41 | 410 | camelbattle: TIFU by peeing on my cat.
I was smoking a cigarette and hanging out in my backyard, with my cat chilling out by my feet. I decided that I'd rather pee outside as God intended, and after checking my left and right to ensure no neighbors happened to be around, whipped my penis out and began to urinate.
My ... | 6 | 68.333333 | |
1405228889 | 1405230967 | t3_2akda6 | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by hooking my coworker up with a girl at the pool
This was from about 7 years ago, but I felt it had to be shared with someone.
Anyways, I flew to Florida for a convention. I was 18 and had decided for some odd reason that it was important to have a girlfriend at that time. My coworker was 27, there to... | 3 | 1 | |
1405229277 | 1405258109 | t3_2akdo2 | t5_2to41 | 22 | DionStabber: TIFU by using possibly the worst comeback ever
Back in Year 7 (in Australia that's the first year of high school) I was often harassed by the "cool" guys. But one day, they came up to me and tried to invite my to a party at one of their houses. I knew they were up to something: there is no reason why they ... | 4 | 5.5 | |
1405233219 | 1405380345 | t3_2akh97 | t5_2to41 | 84 | AshieeRose: TIFU by farting with a G-string on.
My boyfriend loves when I wear intimate underwear, so I've made it a habit to do so as much as possible. Today was no exception.
I'm sitting on the computer working on my hobby and browsing Reddit, when I feel the need to fart. I'm comfortable doing this in front of my ... | 5 | 16.8 | |
1405223404 | 1405388336 | t3_2ak78c | t5_2to41 | 4 | suigenic: TIFU by carelessly clicking
Earlier today at about 7 I was browsing /r/guro (I know.) before I was going to hang out with some friends. They called and said where to meet so I got off the computer, headed over, all that. We had a fun time.
I got home and my parents are sitting on the couch looking at tile or... | 5 | 0.8 | |
1405704495 | 1405711440 | t3_2akkb3 | t5_2to41 | 4 | TopShelfQueen: Happened to me too. I was shocked at how bad it stings.
MrAbernathy: Seriously, I freaked out for a little bit because I thought I was gonna go blind,
TopShelfQueen: I'm gay so this was actually good training. At the time I felt pretty degraded though.
| 3 | 1.333333 | |
1405234341 | 1405348888 | t3_2aki70 | t5_2to41 | 9 | Sohcahtoa82: TIFU by running a VNC server on my computer so I can access it remotely
To those that don't know, a VNC server allows you to access your desktop remotely. VNC servers exist for all major operating systems, Windows, Linux, and Mac. I run it so I can do things like start downloading a movie or installing a... | 4 | 2.25 | |
1405239588 | 1405243870 | t3_2akm3j | t5_2to41 | 17 | Mypoordog: TIFU by taking my dog out to play.
This was just a few hours ago. I feel so sick I can't even function.
My dog, Izzy, loves to chase laser light. I take her out almost every night to chase the light from our yard through the empty two lots next to us and back. She waits for it every night. As soon as the k... | 9 | 1.888889 |
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