start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1405240038 | 1405280183 | t3_2akmec | t5_2to41 | 95 | MILLANDSON: TIFU by answering the door
So, early yesterday morning I was sat at my computer in the lounge, just in my boxers and a t-shirt, having been chatting with a girl I really like for about 7 hours throughout the night. I'd had a few energy drinks, but I was still pretty much half-asleep on my feet chatting, and... | 6 | 15.833333 | |
1405237470 | 1405257107 | t3_2akklk | t5_2to41 | 9 | crackedandconfused: TIFU by talking to my ex
To start off, myself and my ex have been trying to get past differences since our breakup this past April, just trying be friends. Fast toward to tonight. We are texting and we get into an argument. I get pissed and stop replying back because I was already irritated and it w... | 3 | 3 | |
1405241510 | 1405357788 | t3_2aknds | t5_2to41 | 176 | vanillasada: TIFU by leaving my nudes folder open.
For years and years I've kept a folder that I keep ALL of my pictures in. I take a lot and I'm lazy, so instead of organizing them I just shove them all into one folder. This includes nudes of me.
I thought I wasn't doing anything today, so I figured it'd be the perfe... | 6 | 29.333333 | |
1405241650 | 1405250233 | t3_2akngo | t5_2to41 | 5 | idonegoofed1: TIFU by kissing a girl
I am an asshole, a fuck up, and any other word you can use to degrade and insult a person.
Today, I really fucked up.
Background: In a relationship with an awesome girl for the past 9 months, been a LDR while she is home from school for the summer for about 2 months.
Ok... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1405243780 | 1405273980 | t3_2akotl | t5_2to41 | 34 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidentally being naked in front of my mom. [NSFW]
This actually happened a couple of weeks ago but still pretty embarrassing.
Anyway its worth noting that I have gotten into a habit of sleeping nude and walk about our house nude when my parents are off on trips or just out. So after either I had t... | 5 | 6.8 | |
1405242788 | 1405428924 | t3_2ako6n | t5_2to41 | 3 | lewis7878: TIFU by scolding F you to my teacher
Not me, but my friend.
World cup finals is happening soon, so me and my friends had a whatsapp group where we discuss who would win. So one of my friends, let's call him Mike, sent "sie fick " in the group in attempt to speak German. Most of us get that it means "fuck yo... | 3 | 1 | |
1405246412 | 1405278394 | t3_2akqg6 | t5_2to41 | 127 | chunkyluverr: TIFU by sending my love interest a photo of my moobs. (NSFW) just in case
OK so I'm not the thinnest of guys. I'm pretty fat.
I've been talking to this girl I met at work for a while. We talk a lot through Skype, cellphones etc and I'd like to think I've gotten pretty close to her. I've been wishing to t... | 4 | 31.75 | |
1405233061 | 1405257813 | t3_2akh4k | t5_2to41 | 16 | Stormtrooper1510: TIFU by drinking half of my team's piss.
Well, we all just graduated high school and all of us were sitting around reflecting on what had been our final year of football (American football for any Europeans reading this). Anywho we are reflecting on memories from football at this point, Good memories,... | 8 | 2 | |
1405248944 | 1405323628 | t3_2aks0m | t5_2to41 | 11 | Chrisbyy: TIFU by cheating on my girlfriend with my ex, while telling my ex that I wasn't with anyone.
Okay so basically a couple of days ago I went round my ex girlfriends house to clear the bad blood between us, because we'd been arguing still since the day we broke up. 9 months earlier. I was intending to tell her a... | 4 | 2.75 | |
1405257035 | 1405479219 | t3_2aky0e | t5_2to41 | 83 | mypoopsmellsbad: TIFU by throwing my fleshlight over a fence and into my neighbors yard
This happened two days ago, and I just heard about it yesterday.
So I bought a fleshlight a few weeks ago to try it out. It was interesting at first but it got old. I decided I would rather go back to the hand after 5 or 6 uses. I d... | 14 | 5.928571 | |
1405258120 | 1405309178 | t3_2akyyu | t5_2to41 | 79 | sagull: TIFU by reading about foreskins
So let me start off by saying that I am 16 year old, male, and I am un-circumcised.
As you know, most of the men in America are circumcised, I believe the number was 65%, so 65% of american men have had their foreskins cut off. Meanwhile, because of my parents' beliefs, I am no... | 8 | 9.875 | |
1405256175 | 1405290470 | t3_2akx84 | t5_2to41 | 7 | awfullyawful: TIFU by locking myself out of the house
(This happened to a good friend of mine last night. I'm writing it from his perspective. Otherwise I'd have to post it to TMFFU)
I came home last night really, really drunk. I went to unlock the front door and discovered I'd lost my keys. No problem, the garage door... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1405258060 | 1405294522 | t3_2akywy | t5_2to41 | 315 | Leedsy: TIFU by casually strolling into my place of work with my knob out..
So I tend bar.. Not a massive bar/pub. It's more of a small hotel type place but has a great reputation as a restaurant in the small town where I live.
Anyways it's been an unusually busy night (literally not had time to even fart) but was in a... | 4 | 78.75 | |
1405262171 | 1405306757 | t3_2al3cq | t5_2to41 | 4 | stupidpussy: TIFU By forgetting the correct CPR ratio
10 years ago I was trained as a pool lifeguard. I mainly get high and teach swim lessons and hit on moms. Good times.
Had a divorced milf mom of a kid I taught always chatting me up so I asked her out. We just finish dinner in the harbor and we are walking by a ... | 4 | 1 | |
1405265681 | 1405319911 | t3_2al7xg | t5_2to41 | 154 | tifu-throw: TIFU and ruined my life
Last Friday my wife and I had planned a small family gathering at our house for Saturday. This included my wife's parents, her cousin and brother, my parents and my sister.
Saturday morning rolls around, I wake up late (around 10:30am) and I noticed my wife had already left to get g... | 11 | 14 | |
1405261560 | 1405453795 | t3_2al2mi | t5_2to41 | 16 | LoveSickMix: TIFU by having an orgasm
Four weeks ago, I had a hysterectomy. For those in the know, it was robotic laproscopic... meaning the healing time is to be minimal.
After the surgery, I was told full recovery would be about six weeks.
For the pain, I was given Oxycodone.
The first week or so, I had major trouble... | 5 | 3.2 | |
1405266220 | 1405348699 | t3_2al8lf | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by not having a condom ready and being stupid
So I've been dating this girl for about a month (we were texting for around 2 months prior), and last night was our first time fully being together. The first two rounds were great and I went in well protected. At some time around 3AM she rolls over and asks... | 3 | 1 | |
1405265072 | 1405367766 | t3_2al735 | t5_2to41 | 6 | CameAtTheWrongTime: TIFU By letting my mother find my cum box
So being a single guy in his 20s, I was jerking it like you normally would but realized that I had no tissues left decided to use my extensive knowledge of reddit and cum into the new shoe box that I had lying in my room. My thinking at the time was to throw... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1405268924 | 1405278276 | t3_2alc9n | t5_2to41 | 16 | dustthrowawaykaz: TIFU by having a wet dream next to a qt [nsfw]
Grunt08: >spaghetti falls out of my pocket regularly
...dude...why are you putting noodles in your pants?
*We don't do that in America!*
dustthrowawaykaz: that means that your autism makes you speechless and you just want to stop existing.
TheyCallM... | 4 | 4 | |
1405270176 | 1405299177 | t3_2ale1e | t5_2to41 | 755 | orphanblaster: TIFU By jerking off while my neighbor watched
Ok so I'm 19 and I still live with my parents but there gone on vacation and so I'm home alone. There is a guy who rents our upstairs loft. The door that connects to the loft staircase is behind my couch where I was sitting naked and watching a rather thrilli... | 8 | 94.375 | |
1405266516 | 1405359954 | t3_2al8yp | t5_2to41 | 276 | TodayIMessedUp: TIFU by swearing during an interview
This happened a few months back. I was looking for a new job; something that'd last long, so I found a listing for a powerline tech and applied. I take a test, pass and a few weeks later I got a call asking if I can go in for an interview, so I accept.
Fast Forwar... | 5 | 55.2 | |
1405274616 | 1405284630 | t3_2alkja | t5_2to41 | 57 | roxys4effy: TIFU by deciding to shit
Here I am. Again. In less than 24 hours... So, lately I've noticed a lot of shart stories and accidental shits. I always feel bad for the person, but its made me never trust my farts.
I wasn't sure what was gonna come out seeing as I had eaten fast food AND Chinese in less than... | 6 | 9.5 | |
1405276203 | 1405276810 | t3_2almro | t5_2to41 | 3 | madmanwithabolt: TIFU By Murphy's Law
I'd like to start by saying this is more of a TWIFU, the tw is this weekend.
So I start on Thursday I'm 20 years old leaving in a college town in Bozeman Montana we have music on main every Thursday which is a huge community gathering. Then because I was ditched by friends I decid... | 3 | 1 | |
1405276048 | 1405372285 | t3_2almkd | t5_2to41 | 19 | dryraininbetween: TIFU by spilling an entire cup of coffee onto the keyboard of my 3wk old laptop.
I was running a game of Shadowrun on my kitchen table with some good friends and we were all drinking coffee and using laptops. After narrowly preventing my coffee from being knocked over when my friend tilted the display... | 8 | 2.375 | |
1405277141 | 1405287294 | t3_2alo4x | t5_2to41 | 88 | pinkempyreal: TIFU by offering a kid a dollar.
I was at the bar on the lake with a large group of people for a birthday party. It was way past dinner time and a family was hanging around with their kids because the weather was getting bad and the kids were obviously were bored to tears. One of the little girls had been... | 16 | 5.5 | |
1405277384 | 1405283340 | t3_2alohp | t5_2to41 | 41 | TheGhostfaceKza: TIFU- By splitting my head open twice(Caution! Bloody Pics)
So this is a story from fall of 2012 into April of 2013. I know it’s a little late but I just joined reddit and if I gotta I'll blame it on the head injuries. I'll start off with some background, I'm a pretty average 23 year old guy, I live in... | 4 | 10.25 | |
1405276017 | 1405344847 | t3_2almiv | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by offering Premier cinema seats to a disabled guest
I work in a multiplex cinema where some of our screens have better seats up a couple of stairs. We have to offer the upgrade to all guests and during a long shift I end up turning on auto-pilot mode saying the same script to everyone.
On this parti... | 7 | 1 | |
1405277994 | 1405287672 | t3_2alpb7 | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by visiting one of the most dangerous/sluttiest cities in my state
So it was a busy day after preparing for a weekend jeep parade by washing, cleaning, and waxing my father's custom jeep in preparation. My best friend was going to join but was unable to. So instead of going to pick him up, my father dec... | 6 | 1 | |
1405279066 | 1405288050 | t3_2alqr8 | t5_2to41 | 2 | sorgen1: TIFU by finallly buying something from Wallmart after 20 years.
Love it or hate it everyone knows Walmart. I am not a big fan of thier politics and low wages and had several bad experiences shopping there while I was in college. But I was a broke student and they had the cheapest stuff in town. Flash forwar... | 4 | 0.5 | |
1405280459 | 1405288739 | t3_2alskg | t5_2to41 | 147 | babycarrotwoes: TIFU by losing 2 baby carrots in my butthole. Need some medical advice.
mildly_witty: Did you just create a Reddit account for this specific scenario? I'd say go to the ER or sit on the toilet. I'm not gonna ask about the carrots (even though I want to).
babycarrotwoes: Yes, its a throwaway. The girlfr... | 6 | 24.5 | |
1405273603 | 1405288894 | t3_2alizy | t5_2to41 | 44 | ketchupmode01234: TIFU by playing footsie with a superior
Cringing every time I think about it...I had been day drinking pretty heavily yesterday while watching the WC game and was feeling happy, confident and social. I had a work sponsored barbecue that evening that I was also trying to loosen up for a bit. At the bar... | 3 | 14.666667 | |
1405281251 | 1405317270 | t3_2altnt | t5_2to41 | 183 | [deleted]: TIFU by giving my sister money
So this happened a few years ago.
My sister wanted money so she could see her boyfriend that lived a few hours away, so me being the nice guy I am I gave her the financial capital, but later my parents found all her clothes and other shit gone. Basically I helped my sister runa... | 4 | 45.75 | |
1405282848 | 1405359256 | t3_2alw13 | t5_2to41 | 3,704 | seraph77: TIFU by peeing on the neighbor's cat.. for months.
Probably 10 years ago, but [this](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2ak7no/tifu_by_peeing_on_my_cat/) story reminded me of this.
The house that was the party spot during our early 20's had a cat that was always around. For whatever reason, he obsessed wi... | 11 | 336.727273 | |
1405287880 | 1405292762 | t3_2am31h | t5_2to41 | 6 | emcjames: TIFU by getting with a girl with the same surname
ok so i went out for a bit of a celebration last night as i've just got back on my feet scored a new job and after being down for about 8 months everything in life has turned around for me. So i figure lets go out and drink far too much. While i was out i seen... | 3 | 2 | |
1405279397 | 1405323427 | t3_2alr78 | t5_2to41 | 158 | vacationbeard: TIFU by allowing my son to think Xanadu was the true ending of Titantic.
So I fucked up by stopping on Titantic as I was channel surfing. My six year old son took interest and I was prepared to change the channel before it got too intense. The ship was already sinking and the scene with the spooning el... | 4 | 39.5 | |
1405287837 | 1405358755 | t3_2am2yt | t5_2to41 | 16 | ZeroCL: TIFU by using my cell phone on the toilet
So there's a new guy at work who sits near me. Being the nice person that I am, I go over and say hello and welcome him to the company. We have a nice chat, he seems like a swell fellow and then I leave. Later that day I go to take my after lunch dump and enjoy my right... | 4 | 4 | |
1405287770 | 1405300014 | t3_2am2uw | t5_2to41 | 14 | ReverendPickleChips: TIFU by dropping dozens of used needles on my feet
So I recently got a job in Cattery (Basically a kennel for cats) and I'm slowly getting the hang of looking after 50+ cats at a time.
Right now we are looking after a cat that has diabetes so we have to give it an insulin injection twice a day an... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1405292457 | 1405296559 | t3_2amacn | t5_2to41 | 25 | [deleted]: TIFU by going to the grocery store while high
Today I went to the grocery store to buy food for the week. I decided to get high first to make it more interesting. It worked. I had my poker face on and collected my items mostly without incident. At one point I was at the banana stand inspecting them for a qua... | 3 | 8.333333 | |
1405294875 | 1405328149 | t3_2amdxb | t5_2to41 | 42 | Pumhole: TIFU by calling my best mate's mum sexy
My friend is a marine stationed overseas and is very forgetful so I text him on his mum's birthday to remind him to call her. I always try and wind him up by telling him that I fancy her and see her while he's away, so today I texted him saying "Remember to say happy bir... | 3 | 14 | |
1405295026 | 1405322805 | t3_2ame5a | t5_2to41 | 36 | littlethrowaway778: TIFU by sniffing my cum
This literally just happened. I'm still in pain and shock.
So, I was browsing facebook and saw one of those insanely hot girls you kinda know posted up some holiday pictures. Naturally I had to jack it, it was a pretty good session and I blew my load. I grabbed some tissue ... | 10 | 3.6 | |
1405295295 | 1405302469 | t3_2ameja | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by shooting snot at work
I am a tutor for high school math. I was going over work with one of my students when he said something funny about the dumb way math textbooks phrase problems, and suddenly I found snot shooting out of my nose onto his math textbook. I cleaned it up and apologized profusely, bu... | 3 | 2 | |
1405296742 | 1405298196 | t3_2amgmx | t5_2to41 | 4 | hman0305: TIFU by burning a hole in my parent's car seat with a cigar.
I'm 18 and was on my way to work smoking a Black and Mild cigar, the ones with the plastic tip at the end. Thinking I didn't want to litter, I attempted to pull the tobacco off the plastic when the cherry dropped and burned a hole in the crotch area... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1405296673 | 1405300749 | t3_2amgj2 | t5_2to41 | 14 | bongleaver: TIFU by leaving drug paraphernalia out in the open at my girlfriend's house for all of her family to see
So.. I was literally just reading TIFU earlier today and some of the things made me cringe and I thought to myself how glad I am that none of these things happened to me. And then I got a call from my gi... | 4 | 3.5 | |
1405297406 | 1405355975 | t3_2amhmh | t5_2to41 | 3 | Cleverbeans: TIFU by discovering her reddit username and telling her.
So I'm starting to see this new girl and she's great. I'm at her place and she's going to take a shower and tells me to use her computer. No problem. Start surfing reddit and notice she's subbed to /r/omg_my_hometown_too. Oh shit, I'm fucked up now. ... | 3 | 1 | |
1405297526 | 1405298998 | t3_2amhsv | t5_2to41 | 9 | MerelyUnfortunate: TIFU by holding a grudge
Disclaimer: minor religion contained, if you don't believe that's cool too. The point is more about a moral standing point I've reached and don't know where to head.
So basically I have a friend that's staying with us for the summer, you could say that we are both quite good... | 4 | 2.25 | |
1405297832 | 1405355505 | t3_2ami8x | t5_2to41 | 110 | [deleted]: TIFU by losing my entire student loan at a strip club
Well, i'm a 19yo university student in london and went out for some drinks with a couple of friends for a birthday. Me and a really good friend of mine made a drunken decision to go to the strip club, by ourselves (just the two of us) after our other mate... | 6 | 18.333333 | |
1405302168 | 1405362580 | t3_2amofr | t5_2to41 | 16 | JonD91: TIFU by cooking Ramen
I'm starting to realize I'm a true dumbass.
So I'm sitting in my apartment and the hunger sensation sets in. I think to myself, "hey, I'll just go grab something quick at McDonald's!" I bring up my Key Bank app, $73.04 and my $181.94 electric bill is due Monday. Probably not a good idea t... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1405302155 | 1405321989 | t3_2amof3 | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU by ejaculating onto my friend's cactus.
WPBDoc: You should left a little sign on it that explained.
"Sap, not Fap".
coool12121212: What was the story? Op deleted
| 3 | 6.666667 | |
1405300539 | 1405315509 | t3_2amm3v | t5_2to41 | 4 | Truthinlions: TIFU by pushing off a four post lift with the door open and ripped the door off
My boss almost hit me, and I had to pay 500 dollars.
Lectovai: What's a four post lift?
repacc: It's a type of car lift.
http://imgur.com/Q3nJ58z
By "pushing off", I'm assuming he was getting the vehicle off of the lift and ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1405305191 | 1405306677 | t3_2amsvy | t5_2to41 | 1 | [deleted]: TIFU by sneaking to my bosses office window at night and putting up an offensive picture
Last year I was taking a co-op placement. I don't know if this is something that's done outside of Canada but here at least a co op placement is a job but instead of money you get highschool credits. I was at this co-op ... | 3 | 0.333333 | |
1405307939 | 1405314526 | t3_2amwy3 | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by not following my gut instincts...
I don't know whether I'm going to be believed or not but I seriously wish this was made up.
So since the grand final teams for the World Cup Final were decided I just couldn't shake this feeling to go place a few dollars on a bet for the point difference to be 1 in... | 5 | 1 | |
1405308159 | 1405324366 | t3_2amx9e | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by failing to record the World Cup soccer final.
My family invited half the neighborhood over to watch the game on TiVo, and lo and behold the DVR recorded the first 3 minutes of the game. I was responsible for setting up the recording, so somehow I was responsible for our DVR being a piece of shit.
E... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1405309146 | 1405377747 | t3_2amymc | t5_2to41 | 9 | wijnwqpiorvju: TIFU by eating old peanut butter chocolate balls.
Earlier today I found a tin full of old late 90's/early 2000's candy. Most of it was lolipops, pez and jellybeans. Mostly stuff that would probably still be good. There was also a bag of these peanut butter balls dipped in chocolate with a foil wrapping t... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1405310638 | 1405312364 | t3_2an0lv | t5_2to41 | 32 | Holovoid: TIFU by trying to trade in porn at Gamestop.
Okay, as with most TIFU stories, this happened about 2 years ago, but I can't help but want to share it. By far one of my favorite stories to tell to people.
Around a year into my relationship with my wife, she bought a grab bag from an Adult store for funsies. Th... | 3 | 10.666667 | |
1405310836 | 1405322303 | t3_2an0vv | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting my boyfriend a job
Today, I landed my boyfriend and job where my mother would be his boss. But that's not the issue. The issue is I am to drive him to and from work, but I also have a job. I am terrified of having to talk to my boss and tell her I must be on odd hours and I'll have to work th... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1405312409 | 1405322784 | t3_2an2x1 | t5_2to41 | 35 | [deleted]: TIFU when I got caught in a girls closet by her father.
This happened over the Fourth of July weekend and *none* of my friends know yet. They also don't know my username, so thank god.
So there's a girl that's had a crush on me for a couple of weeks and she's over at my place on the 4th. She's blonde, cute,... | 4 | 8.75 | |
1405313082 | 1405317529 | t3_2an3rz | t5_2to41 | 27 | [deleted]: TIFU by farting
So today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time in probably about a month.
Right as I was about to come, I farted in his face. Now he is refusing to even touch me....
[deleted]: What a fucking sissy. My latest gf was so comfortable with me we laughed when she queefed. I also was n... | 3 | 9 | |
1405314397 | 1405394271 | t3_2an5dn | t5_2to41 | 23 | nastyidiotthrowaway: TIFU by insisting to share a bed with my cousin
    I'm a 23 yr old male who is going no where fast. Since I have been out of work for a while, I decide to go visit some family out of state. The house I'll be staying at belongs to my 25 yr old female cousin Lucy and her b... | 6 | 3.833333 | |
1405317480 | 1406203213 | t3_2an8wt | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU by asking my best friend out
Once I met her I instantly fell in love and since have been best friends (I'm a male) over a period of three years I have been trying to impress her. I have spent at least $200 dollars on things either for her or games to play with her (even if I don't like them) I did every... | 11 | 1.545455 | |
1405317982 | 1405348532 | t3_2an9gs | t5_2to41 | 21 | [deleted]: TIFU by rejecting a horny girl at a local club
**Let me start this out by saying that this isn't really a regular TIFU, but more a missed opportunity. I just really needed to get this off my chest.**
I'm a virgin. I don't party much. Maybe once every two months, if the opportunity even arises. This weekend,... | 3 | 7 | |
1405319847 | 1405320473 | t3_2anbhj | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: Tifu by coming in my pants
Well today my girlfriend was over at my house and we started making out which is what usually happens. A few times in the past she's gotten on top of me and dry humped me and nothing really happened. This time though I'm not sure what happened but I came after about a minute of it ... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1405319882 | 1405441036 | t3_2anbiv | t5_2to41 | 1,010 | mightybeggar: TIFU by logging into my gmail on my gf's phone. wtf google?!
today i logged into my gf's iphone to check my email and logged back out. about an hour ago she asked me "did you type in 'how to peel off a sunburn' in my phone?" i thought of the time i typed it in google on my own laptop, at home, about a wee... | 10 | 101 | |
1405320082 | 1405393761 | t3_2anbr1 | t5_2to41 | 347 | iamabadatheist: TIFU by laughing at work.
I work in Healthcare and occasionally I have to draw patients' blood as part of my job. Tonight, I got the call for a blood draw so I went up to the patient's room. She was laying in bed, her husband sitting next to her, and they were watching something on TV.
I introduce myse... | 9 | 38.555556 | |
1405322893 | 1405367964 | t3_2anef8 | t5_2to41 | 88 | [deleted]: TIFU by masturbating without lube
I only started masturbating this year although I am of legal (US) drinking age which I feel the need to inform you people not only because it is freaky deaky and fun to brag about but also because I am still really fumbling my way around figuring out how is best for me to ma... | 8 | 11 | |
1405323265 | 1405326782 | t3_2aneqw | t5_2to41 | 22 | potlabor: tifu by signing up to the Australian labor party
So, this is a pretty long story and ultimately leads back to the labor party..
I'm 18 and about 6 weeks ago I decided that because I wasn't getting many shifts at work I wanted to make money some other way. Ding, pot. I looked into it. A gram in aus sells for ... | 4 | 5.5 | |
1405323522 | 1405330928 | t3_2aneyo | t5_2to41 | 20 | sexyboipierced: TIFU: let my g/f meet my hooker
So my g/f was complaining that the guy she always buys weed from was out of town and wanted me to hook her up. So I call my weed girl that also is a pro on the side (hey girls got to eat right?) so I figure short car trip and no big deal, the pro and I have a back story p... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1405326786 | 1405353222 | t3_2anhm3 | t5_2to41 | 17 | theres_always_one49: TIFU by drinking too much NSFW
I fell off the wagon and drank way too much with a guy I really like. Before said drinking, I had heard on good authority he may have liked me too. But of course I fucked it up by hanging out with him and both of us had waaaay too much to drink. The end of the night i... | 5 | 3.4 | |
1405327154 | 1405377217 | t3_2anhvv | t5_2to41 | 41 | peesonants: TIFU by peeing by the side of a road
This happened many years ago to my cousin when we were children but I still find it hilarious so I figured I’d share this memory with you.
Backstory:
I lived in NC, and my cousin and her mother were visiting us from Germany for a couple of months. In the middle of thei... | 4 | 10.25 | |
1405329143 | 1405340652 | t3_2anjhq | t5_2to41 | 69 | runninblue: TIFU by opening my eyes.
I'm sleeping on a relative's floor for a couple of days and while just barely awake I heard a noise. I opened my eyes just as my dad stepped over my head wearing nothing but very loose boxers.
mattypanda: At least he didn't tea bag you. Because he could have.
emilskoda: Maybe he di... | 5 | 13.8 | |
1405328448 | 1405650920 | t3_2anixl | t5_2to41 | 2 | bugsmourn: TIFU By calling the principal a nazi dickhead
So this was 6th grade, And being loner me I was skipping gym to sit at a table and read. While reading someone came up beside me and said "Shouldnt you be in class instead of reading" Without thinking of anything except how mad I was that I was disturbed reading ... | 8 | 0.25 | |
1405332679 | 1405333120 | t3_2anm9a | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting stuck in a kangaroo pouch for 2 hours.
Went to the zoo today. Now as a 6ft 6 man child I thought I would attempt to fit into a statue kangaroos pouch for what at the time seemed like a golden photo opportunity. As i squeezed in my over sized shoulders and head, barely managing to crown the po... | 3 | 1 | |
1405333714 | 1405375776 | t3_2ann2n | t5_2to41 | 221 | Harry101UK: TIFU by pointing my camera at a 1 year-old
So, I was sitting in a café at Seattle Tacoma airport with a friend, waiting for a flight back home. Another friend on Facebook messaged me, asking for a photo of us for some reason, so I decided to take a picture of the two of us at the table.
I held out the iPad... | 7 | 31.571429 | |
1405337939 | 1405347813 | t3_2anqj5 | t5_2to41 | 9 | winter_love: TIFU by leaving $40 at the ATM
I went to take money out of the ATM and (having my mind on life problems) forgot to take my money after taking my card. I just hope I made the day of whoever found them and that they go to good use.
theyellowshark: Now they're are alot of factors.. What kinda ATM? Was it the... | 4 | 2.25 | |
1405340616 | 1405433110 | t3_2ant65 | t5_2to41 | 1,700 | sagull: TIFU by jerking off into my sock
~~I'm browsing 4chan, I come across a porn thread, I get aroused, and its time to fap. I'm beating it to this one video and I'm about to blow. So naturally I grab my sock that was right next to me on the floor and I'm about to cum into it to avoid making a mess.~~
~~Turns out t... | 10 | 170 | |
1405341008 | 1405387431 | t3_2antmf | t5_2to41 | 638 | Stickmanman: TIFU by getting a tattoo on my butt.
(Throwaway for obvious reasons.) This was a few days ago now but this is the first chance I've had to post it. Alright, so some mates and I decided to have a few drinks together as we usually do every now and then. After having a bit too much to drink, we decided to cal... | 9 | 70.888889 | |
1405342455 | 1405377132 | t3_2anv8p | t5_2to41 | 24 | IhoLMZ: TIFU By not checking for toilet roll
So im sat at work, time goes by, and the nature calls. So I go to the toilet having a number 2, after around 10-15 minutes I feel empty so reach for the toilet roll, only to find there was no toilet roll.
This was the ONE time I didn't take my phone. I'm panicking, alot. Fr... | 4 | 6 | |
1405345680 | 1405357330 | t3_2anza0 | t5_2to41 | 142 | blunttastic: TIFU by making fun of my boss's cancer
My boss and I are always joking around. He usually come in my office and punches me or just talks shit, we work construction. Well he walks in this morning and again starts fucking with me, he gives me a punch on the shoulder and I respond by telling him "You're gonna... | 4 | 35.5 | |
1405345816 | 1405347586 | t3_2anzg5 | t5_2to41 | 14 | Bob002: TIFU by losing part of my genital jewelry at my bosses' house
First, for those of you that are super excited, I'm a guy. I've had a Prince Albert (which goes into my urethra through the bottom and out the front) for about 7-8 years now. I've stretched it from about an 8 gauge to a 2 gauge.
My boss bought a hou... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1405342177 | 1405363643 | t3_2anuwz | t5_2to41 | 5 | DabyTheHunter: TIFU by drinking too much Pineapple juice
Was really thirsty and drank an entire thing of Pineapple juice. Now I am regretting it since I have been running to the bathroom every 10 minutes. Probably last time I ever drink Pineapple juice.
XDWetness: If you have a gf, have sex ASAP.
PoorCitizen: Why?
war... | 5 | 1 | |
1405350497 | 1405369194 | t3_2ao6sa | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU by leaving my bondage porn folder open on the computer that is hooked to the TV.
We watch everything via computer with 2nd monitor being the TV. I was watching some porn last night, all of my porn is bondage porn with most being from kink.com and its offchutes. I have somewhere around a hundred and tw... | 6 | 3.333333 | |
1405351596 | 1405357652 | t3_2ao8mj | t5_2to41 | 33 | babycarrotwoes: TIFU by posting to this sub about my baby carrot ordeal, only to have it removed without explanation.
Cylinsier: That sounds like a fuck-up for sure. But mods can't move threads to other subs.
mamajamerson: In my experience, they do usually message with an explanation for why it was removed. That ma... | 3 | 11 | |
1405352252 | 1405391418 | t3_2ao9qp | t5_2to41 | 217 | Unfvckwitable: TIFU by texting my mom instead of my girlfriend
So my girlfriend got home yesterday from a 10-day family trip to Mexico. Being that she was in Mexico, she's got some stomach issues going on. In order to try to resolve them, she took a laxative last night. Well this morning I woke up having to take a mean... | 6 | 36.166667 | |
1405353018 | 1405416966 | t3_2aob2q | t5_2to41 | 41 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to take a shower at midnight
Since I'm home for the summer, I'm working a 9-5 job plus a commute. This means I have to wake up before the dew fairies themselves and if I want to not be fired I have to go to bed at a reasonable hour.
Last night I told the 'rents that I was going to sleep aroun... | 7 | 5.857143 | |
1405356461 | 1405374770 | t3_2aoh45 | t5_2to41 | 55 | [deleted]: TIFU by taking a dump at my friend's house, but not in the toilette.
[deleted]: Today the vet fucked up by not being able to distinguish a cat shit from a human shit.
Sometimes_Lies: Doctors go off the information they're given.
If someone brings in a picture of a mess and says "my cat did this, what is wr... | 7 | 7.857143 | |
1405357578 | 1405361683 | t3_2aoj43 | t5_2to41 | 4 | Frankyfan3: TIFU by locking my wallet & keys in my car just as I'm about to leave for vacation.
I'm sitting in the grocery store parking lot after my last shopping trip before a week long camping adventure.
Loaded up the cooler with ice & stuff, took the cart back & then realized my wallet & keys were ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1405371493 | 1405406606 | t3_2aoo5s | t5_2to41 | 12 | Zico195: Try coca cola
6romperstomper9: .....or you could just piss on it.
asphaltdragon: If OP is able to piss on his beard, we need pics. Not any man will piss on his own face.
6romperstomper9: Todd Carney - bubbling. 2 weeks ago.
Edit- added link
http://imgur.com/1f6Qz2b
virtuallynonexistent: what the fuck
| 5 | 2.4 | |
1405362843 | 1405376560 | t3_2aosvu | t5_2to41 | 42 | [deleted]: TIFU by going in to work wasted
So I work the graveyard shift at a local convenient store alone. Saturday, after working two weeks straight with only one night off i decided to have a few beers at 6:00 am. Around 10:00 am I'm still drinking and a friend comes over.
Well we pretty much drank the whole day, ... | 4 | 10.5 | |
1405307009 | 1405375538 | t3_2amvli | t5_2to41 | 13 | SCP-247: TIFU when I forgot to change a contact's name
So i have this girl i like and she has a common name that can be used for girls or guys. She is in my phones as [common name] #swag she put that in a while ago and the guys name is [common name] [last-name] this works fine except on an Iphone when I got the message... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1405359379 | 1405367583 | t3_2aomcn | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by finishing playing "Brothers - A Tale of Two Sons" with my little brother
Instead of looking up the whole story or the recommended age, I just relied on the positive reviews and thought that it would be a nice game for me and my little brother, especially because it was easy to play together on a keyb... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1405366094 | 1405370633 | t3_2aoz34 | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by jerking off into a sock filled with rats
desolatexelevation: So you came on rat? Rat porn? you really are dirty OP
Jacksonhhs: The name is Charlie not op
desolatexelevation: Alright, "charlie"
| 4 | 0.75 | |
1405348876 | 1405371004 | t3_2ao459 | t5_2to41 | 9 | hal8119: TIFU by kicking the wall while asleep
So this was around 2:30am today. I was having a weird dream about a dog licking my foot and for some reason my brain decided kicking the shit out of the dog would be the best action. Well there was no dog and I kicked the shit out of the wall next to my bed leaving me with... | 3 | 3 | |
1405366185 | 1405404466 | t3_2aoz9a | t5_2to41 | 16 | [deleted]: TIFU by giving a blowjob. NSFW
This past weekend, my boyfriend & I traveled to the casino for a weekend of beach & booze. We spent the day laying on the beach & didn't realize how strong the sun was until it was too late; we were matching lobsters. We got back to his house yesterday where we show... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1405367304 | 1405568115 | t3_2ap1eq | t5_2to41 | 202 | bag-pipes: TIFU by horribly offending a group of women
I work as a Lifeguard at a very prestigious country club, and today during my shift there were very few people at the pool. There were a group of about 8 moms huddled around some chairs speaking softly, and two children (a girl and a boy, both very young) in the po... | 8 | 25.25 | |
1405367011 | 1405438561 | t3_2ap0vg | t5_2to41 | 137 | Bigminotaur: TIFU by getting caught by a parent... AGAIN.
Well, Reddit, it appears I am an idiot. I've posted another TIFU maybe a month or two ago. T'was about getting caught by my girlfriend's mom while we were doing the do. Anyways, today I got another one for ya. After a while we decided to have sex again for the f... | 6 | 22.833333 | |
1405369517 | 1405510168 | t3_2ap5hg | t5_2to41 | 47 | GoldPickleFist: TIFU by forgetting that I was in Disney World
This didn't actually happen today, etc.
It was a lovely March afternoon in Orlando, FL. The sun was out, nary a cloud to be seen, and the heat was much more bearable than usual. I was in the middle of enjoying my high school's senior trip to Disney World, a... | 4 | 11.75 | |
1405371714 | 1405372176 | t3_2ap9m2 | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU By stealing food from my mother in law.
I was at my mother-in-law house waiting for my husband when I spotted some cookies on top of the fridge. I grabbed one and it was stuck to another. As I was pulling them out the one I wasnt touching drops to the floor. Yay a reason to eat both! Grab the second one... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1405372280 | 1405388999 | t3_2apao9 | t5_2to41 | 5 | RetardedNarhwal: TIFU by snorting wasabi.
A few days ago i arrived into my hotel in Tokyo, Japan. I came here with a couple friends and every night i would bring a new bottle of this weird Japanese alcohol and pass it around. On my 2nd day drunk me thought it would be a GREAT idea too snort some wasabi, (that green stu... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1405372511 | 1405375449 | t3_2apb3i | t5_2to41 | 31 | Daddy_Long_Legs_: TIFU by taking my girlfriend for a romantic walk.
So, like any guy in a happy relationship, I try to do cute things every once in a while that make my girlfriend feel nice. A romantic walk seemed like just the thing to accomplish that. Everything was going great at first. We walked down a quaint path... | 3 | 10.333333 | |
1405372122 | 1405389972 | t3_2apaek | t5_2to41 | 344 | MrCuriousCat: Tifu by swinging my balls in New York
I recently applied for a high position for a meat packing company and I live in ohio. They called me to fly out to new York for the interview and they said that they had paid for the hotel for me to spend a night in. The next day, I did the interview and went back to ... | 8 | 43 | |
1405369153 | 1405378510 | t3_2ap4tp | t5_2to41 | 583 | [deleted]: TIFU by Getting into my First Fist-Fight with a Clown, and now my Nickname is "Clown Slayer"
This happened last Saturday but since the ordeal is dragging on for some silly reason, I figured I'd post what happened. Also, for privacy purposes I've left out key details like location & names just in case cha... | 7 | 83.285714 |
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