start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1348523867 | 1348590603 | null | t5_2to41 | 27 | [deleted]: TIFU by letting out a massive fart on the my first day of my new job
It was right at the beginning. I ate a lot yesterday and it came out. I tried to hide out and do it but it wasn't far enough away. My boss and co worker heard it. Damnit.
Kellen1337: step brothers lol
[deleted]: Never seen it lol
gargerens... | 6 | 4.5 | |
1348538740 | 1348559521 | null | t5_2to41 | 55 | InexplicableReasons: TIFU Had an emotional melt down to a girl I knew for 4 weeks max via fb. Discovered I have low self esteem.
Went out with a girl, turns out she didn't want to continue dating past date #3
So naturally I pushed and prodded. I got the "You are making me uncomfortable" and then it struggled from ther... | 6 | 9.166667 | |
1348540204 | 1348570207 | null | t5_2to41 | 53 | ElGenioMalvado: TIFU by buying a pack of cigarettes for the first time in almost a month.
there was no great moment of stress or anything.. i just really wanted it.. it felt so natural.
cellophane off completely, remove that annoying foil cover, tap tap on lighter, smell it, light it, deep inhale.. OMG IT WAS AWESOME!... | 6 | 8.833333 | |
1348576782 | 1348612227 | null | t5_2to41 | -5 | 2_feet_too_tall: TIFU by telling my class "I hate Obama" on the second day of school.
My teacher wanted us to write down several "interesting facts about ourselves". Not knowing it was going to be used to meet new people, I wrote down my displeasure for Obama. A rather "ghetto" african american girl started cussing me ... | 3 | -1.666667 | |
1348592685 | 1348634330 | null | t5_2to41 | 394 | FlyingMonkey420: TIFU by thinking that my court was at 1 pm when it was at 8 am, now I think i am waiting to be arrested
The worst part is it's over a dumb driving charge. Now is looking like I might spend a few days in jail and lose my job that I got just 2 days ago
[UPDATE] After a long day in jail I am finally home... | 10 | 39.4 | |
1348617283 | 1348640203 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting expelled for the second time.
I am a senior in high school and after my parents found out, they were devastated. It all happened so fast. I've never been this depressed before in my life. I've let many people down. Is my future over? please help me reddit
maraedits: Am I the only one who real... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1348613126 | 1348620238 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | malloryr: TIFU by accidentally dropping my toothbrush in the toilet.
Our cabinets are right above the toilet and I was taking my toothbrush out of my overnight bag and it fell out of my hand. Why, God, why.
moldar: Did you fish it out and use it?
malloryr: I doused it in rubbing alcohol and I almost did, but I chickene... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1348626605 | 1349054646 | null | t5_2to41 | 510 | adamandatium: TIFU by swearing over the intercom at work.
I work at a grocery store, and like most stores there's an intercom/phone system. One of the Pepsi/Coke stockers needed to find another employee, so I picked up the phone to page him.
"Employee, dial 1213. Employee, 1213."
The employee did not hear the page, s... | 7 | 72.857143 | |
1348633126 | 1348723415 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | [deleted]: TIFU my fucking toe [Gross description, don't read if queasy]
Long story short, I have an ingrown toenail on my right big toe, on the right side of it. It's swollen, leaks pus, and it hurts enough to make me shout out in agony every time I smack it on something. You know the saying "stuck out like a sore thu... | 5 | 6.2 | |
1348675131 | 1348771131 | null | t5_2to41 | 110 | pessimistdiary: TIFU by spending all my bill money to do things for my friends.
My phone, which I need for work, is about to be shut off. I can't afford to put gas in my car, buy groceries, or get the medicine I need for my (not immediately life threatening, but serious) illness, until pay day. Pay day is in a week... | 8 | 13.75 | |
1348675803 | 1348706553 | null | t5_2to41 | 853 | DevilWorshipper: TIFU: I forgot how to walk.
I'm an introvert and an alcoholic. I go most days without uttering a single word to anyone with the possible exception of "thank you" to the liquor store clerk. Thanks to a DUI, I have to walk everywhere I go. Usually, if I see someone on the street coming toward me I cross ... | 9 | 94.777778 | |
1348695107 | 1348755198 | null | t5_2to41 | 272 | KaiserInch: TIFU by being stupidly and profoundly racist.
I took my girlfriend to a pizza buffet, being the classy guy I am. It's swamped with loud black people, so I take this opportunity to let the stereotypes in my mind run wild. I wont try to justify it - I'm just a bitter person who can't see past my own small wor... | 10 | 27.2 | |
1348578420 | 1348880979 | null | t5_2to41 | 25 | I_Love_those: TIFU with hair removal cream
I got tired of shaving my nut sack, it is way too fiddly to do without the fear of God in you. So in my infinite wisdom I had decided to use body hair removal cream. I read the instructions thoroughly including the bit where it says not to use on intimate areas. But I'm a man... | 6 | 4.166667 | |
1348702853 | 1348717033 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | cryss12: TIFU by hitting my dad's work van this morning.
I was in a rush this morning to get to my class, and backed out without thinking, my car was sort of at an angle and managed to hit my dad's van that is HUGE AND WHITE!! At first I thought there was no damage, I only inspected his car, but upon further notice whe... | 7 | 2 | |
1348709443 | 1349214088 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | lilbill952: TIFU: By saying Nigger with my one black friend around.
Now I have zero black friends
The_Warning: I'll sometimes say it ironically/in a joking way/when I stub my toe around my black friends. They don't give a fuck.
msbaltimore1: It's not true that they don't care. They still like you enough not to punch yo... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1348715217 | 1348718708 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | pervertcollegekid: TIFU by insulting a stranger who turned out to be a classmate
Today, walking back from the dining hall, I saw a married professor talking to an attractive and much younger undergraduate student. From the way he was sitting, I stupidly assumed he was pulling some sort of shenanigan. I promptly made a ... | 3 | 1 | |
1348721831 | 1348771533 | null | t5_2to41 | 306 | PhysicsIsMyMistress: TIFU at work because my kindle is an asshole
I was bored at work and my current task was boring. So I decided to try my kindle's text-to-voice. I put on my headphones and it played The Robots of Dawn by Isaac Asimov. Now everything was fine and dandy up until it reached the section where this woman... | 4 | 76.5 | |
1348723229 | 1348878495 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | goth_lover: TIFU by sleeping with a friend with a fiance
i've known the friend(and the fiance) for years. she was drunk(and i didn't realize HOW drunk), knew she was engaged, and still succumbed to her advances. kinda feel shitty, mainly cuz of the fact that i may have lost a friend, but the sex was so damn good that ... | 5 | 0.8 | |
1348718760 | 1348895507 | null | t5_2to41 | 34 | RainbowYawn: TIFU by breaking up with the person I actually love.
Not really today, but the other day. I guess I just confused terrible timing to be in a relationship for falling out of love with someone.
I broke up with him on Friday, having had the absolute worst timing and worst method of doing so. It was a week ... | 5 | 6.8 | |
1348741726 | 1348779761 | null | t5_2to41 | 75 | [deleted]: TIFU by being too self absorbed
A month or so ago I was texting a female friend who i hadn't spoken to in a while. We started speaking more and more and getting closer and closer, helping each other out and stuff. About a week after she asked how my summer had been and I said not great as my girlfriend had b... | 5 | 15 | |
1348763552 | 1348989354 | null | t5_2to41 | 389 | stupidfool2709: I've been fired, but was stupid enough to sign a paper that I wanted out myself
aka_tom: It´s an old trick Human Resources staff is trained to perform and, I believe, they also get rewarded for that. I was fired in 2010 after 3 1/2 years in the company. I thought this chick in HR was my friend, I cried... | 9 | 43.222222 | |
1348757481 | 1352080228 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | IronUniverse: TIFU by picking my nose and the booger fell into my coffee, and I didn't know till after I took a sip.
WhatsInAName39: I pick my nose and eat my boogers. On purpose.
IronUniverse: yeah but that's because your innately gross or you never got over the saltiness of your own nose.
CarlosIHernandez: >picks... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1348772168 | 1348804014 | null | t5_2to41 | 127 | prussianiron: TIFU by getting blackout drunk and punching a girl
T(wo days ago)IFU by punching one of my close female friends in the eye.
Monday night me and some friends had some other dudes from our college over for drinks. At one point our friend (we'll call her Kate) came over, but this was after I had downed abou... | 8 | 15.875 | |
1348780457 | 1349075603 | null | t5_2to41 | 60 | elgatonoesbueno: TIFU my first day of work
So, I just turned 21 a month ago, and just got a job at a casino. Yesterday was my orientation and during this they said they are a "fun" company and during the month of October we're allowed to dress up. Never being allowed in a casino before I didn't know what the uniforms w... | 3 | 20 | |
1348806181 | 1348855484 | null | t5_2to41 | 113 | swerrrve: TIFU Texted a message about my boss...to my boss...and HIS boss.
I work as a poker dealer at a racetrack/card club in Minnesota. My direct superior decides which tables I deal and when. I had just gone through two awful tables and the second one broke(all the players left meaning I would be sent to a new line... | 4 | 28.25 | |
1348775988 | 1348933211 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | startover4: TIFU by going to get yogurt
Last night after work, approximately 9 PM I went to get yogurt. My friend works at a yogurt shop so I can get it for free, why not go get free yogurt I said to myself after work.
Anyways as I am pulling through the parking lot I look down to change the song on my phone. I ... | 4 | 6.5 | |
1348839621 | 1348878326 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | rainonbird: TIFU when i lied to my touchy friend and she found out.
she is very touchy in the way that you dont want to be on her bad side. I lied to her by cancelling something to do something else with another friend and she found out. What do i do?? Ugh she pisses me off sometimes
dcb720: Apologize profusely, since ... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1348841614 | 1348879259 | null | t5_2to41 | 799 | I_Already_Know_OK: TIFU I read her diary. While she loves me, she is not attracted to me AT ALL
I made it out of the friendzone and into the endzone with her. She is 36, a solid 8/10, funny, smart, and really my best friend. I am 39, 5/10 , and a balding ginger (think a 6 ft version of Powder).
When we first met... | 7 | 114.142857 | |
1348860592 | 1348987764 | null | t5_2to41 | 968 | somethingcleverer: TIFU by pissing on my wife... Yeah
So yeah... I was at the bar last night with some out of town friends. We weren't very drunk, just middling. I had probably 4 or five beers and a couple of shots over a three hour period. I was drunk, but by no means loaded. My buddy offers me a Unisom (over the coun... | 11 | 88 | |
1348873173 | 1349145454 | null | t5_2to41 | 149 | LookieOverThere: TIFU by sleeping with my insane cheating ex
We've been on-off for the past 3 years and it's like a horrible addiction I can't break. I have this intense physical reaction whenever I see him and next thing I know we're in bed. The worst part is I'd been able to cut off communications for 3 months until ... | 8 | 18.625 | |
1348867884 | 1348944379 | null | t5_2to41 | 32 | [deleted]: TIFU by not taking out the trash
I decided the other day that I was going to clean my entire apartment top to bottom, which includes throwing out things in the fridge that have gone bad. It was gross enough at the time to throw out old celery and cucumbers and whatnot, so I gave myself a break and left my ga... | 5 | 6.4 | |
1348867046 | 1349110076 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | HDATZ: TIFU by making my friend look like he shit himself.
It rained last night, and I forgot to roll my car's driver side window up before I passed out. I gave my friend, who is also a co- worker and the person who put in a good word for me at our job a ride to work this morning, since our shifts started at the same ... | 5 | 6.6 | |
1348881944 | 1348949650 | null | t5_2to41 | 49 | [deleted]: tifu by betting on a fart and lost.
Sitting in In n Out, feel a small fart coming on. Ended up being diarrhea. Had to sit in my boxers turned underwear for the meal.
Darkstrategy: I'm getting kind of tired how every other post in this subreddit is "LOL SHIT MY PANTS".
I don't even understand how it's poss... | 5 | 9.8 | |
1348912067 | 1349137660 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | i_am_sad: TIFU by taking my sock off at work, in a public bathroom.
I just got new shoes (yay) because my old Etnies were so worn thin from (years) of use that my feet hurt unbelievably. Like hot coals after having a criss cross pattern of deep gashes cut into my feet by the time I got off work, it was just terrible. S... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1348927424 | 1348992309 | null | t5_2to41 | 378 | schuppaloop: TIFU. I sprayed bear spray (very powerful mace) all over my room and got it in my mouth because I was curious about what it tasted like.
I recently moved into my new apartment a week or two ago. Yesterday I decided I'd finish unpacking the remainder of my things and organize my room.
Since I do a lot of s... | 10 | 37.8 | |
1348931436 | 1349106399 | null | t5_2to41 | 208 | [deleted]: TIFU by whipping a condom out in front of the president of a company
So I am a computer programmer, and as part of my job working at this development agency, we have to go out to discuss with customers what projects we are going to work on for them. I drive my project manager out to the clients office. At ... | 4 | 52 | |
1348933709 | 1349134846 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | CloudlessAbyss: TIFU Got mad and punched my laptop's screen causing the LED's to break
TIFU, it was last night and since I broke my laptop's screen I couldn't post it onto reddit until the next day. In case you're wondering I'm using my mom's computer. One thing to note is I'm asian and currently in highschool.
So I w... | 3 | 1 | |
1348954035 | 1349164066 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | littlemissmustache: TIFU by getting arrested for stowing away on Amtrak.
Never been arrested before, so I'm sort of scared shitless of what'll happen.
EDIT: Okay, backstory. I had no money and REALLY neded to get from point A to point B fast, but they're three hours apart. I thought by just hiding in bathrooms I'd be ... | 6 | 5.5 | |
1348929374 | 1349373031 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | gamingthinktank: TIFU running at 12 mph on treadmill...a sudden power failure taught me an interesting lesson of life
While your life is on fast track...do care about your power sources. It reminded me failure of a software company just because of inadequate supply of skilled human resource. The guy moved his business ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1348951751 | 1348963785 | null | t5_2to41 | 55 | Duiker123: TIFU: Puked everywhere in a restaurant.
Okay, now I just discovered this subreddit. This story is actually from last year. So I was up in Gainesville, FL visiting my brother and for breakfast, me, my brother, his fiancé, and my parents went out to a crackle barrel. I felt fine throughout the course of the m... | 5 | 11 | |
1348967092 | 1349060808 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | Thereminz: TIFU by browsing reddit instead of going to work.
it wasn't a conscious decision, i thought i didn't have to go in today so i was just fucking around on reddit, then i went in to check the schedule (yes they don't hand you a schedule you have to go in and look at it which was part of the problem) and i was s... | 6 | 5.833333 | |
1349007807 | 1350133135 | null | t5_2to41 | 542 | ashessnow: TIFU Backing out of my parking space.
So I'm in my car about to reverse out of my parking spot in the ally behind my place when I realize that what I previously thought was a harmless little spiderweb I had walked through before getting into my car was actually a giant spiderweb that is all over me, and so ... | 15 | 36.133333 | |
1349008865 | 1349014380 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | dareddann3: TIFU by leaving my keys, money, credit cards, all in my new jacket at a friends house. I just arrived home. This is going to be a long day.
[deleted]: How is this a big deal?
an_ill_mallard: I imagine he lives a long distance away from said friend and had only his phone to post. Have fun driving ten hours ... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1348995783 | 1349304523 | null | t5_2to41 | 44 | goalump: TIFU by getting all inappropriate about an underage cartoon character
Well, actually it was last Thursday at work. A colleague of mine, who is a bit of a conservative guy, overheard me talking to another guy about The Avengers movie. I am the office comic book geek, so this is not an unusual event. He comes ov... | 5 | 8.8 | |
1349023324 | 1349100787 | null | t5_2to41 | 51 | LouderSixpounder: TIFU By going 22 MPH over the speed limit.
My little brother was home alone and I was trying to get to him as quickly as possible. I was pulled over and ticketed, and I don't know whether or not I have to go to court. From what I read, it's a 3 point offense here in GA and I'm under 21. I'm worried a... | 7 | 7.285714 | |
1349035407 | 1349036669 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | ptanaka: TIFU Cuz my phone went & vibrated loudly at a funeral
It's a new android. I didn't know the church had wifi, and the phone "found" it and I started getting new announcements vibrations. I had turned off the sound, but not the vibration; who knew a church would have WIFI!?!?
My husband was sitting next t... | 3 | 1 | |
1349053391 | 1349116774 | null | t5_2to41 | 43 | [deleted]: Reddit TIFU by overestimating how long it takes for the garage door at my apartment to come down.
I thought I had enough time to get through but then I hear... *CUSH!* and a scraping sound as I try and make it through. A family was watching me the whole time with horrified expressions. I was so embarrassed I... | 4 | 10.75 | |
1349058721 | 1349192347 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | raika11182: TIFU by eating my wife's chocolate bar.
Background: My wife does NOT like dark chocolate. She's made this clear to me on many occassions. Yesterday she ran out for some errands and asked if I wanted anything, so I asked her to pick me up some chocolate. She lovingly obliged and brought home (along with some... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1349062717 | 1349230644 | null | t5_2to41 | 150 | skirlaug: TIFU by baking delicious bagels for the first time
I had a hankering to cook/bake something substantial, so I decided to make some bagels for my breakfast for the next week. I followed a recipe, had all the bagels boiled and ready to go in the oven, and baked the first batch flawlessly.
But when I put in the... | 9 | 16.666667 | |
1349065926 | 1349126371 | null | t5_2to41 | 420 | Felpeh: TIFU by unintentionally ruining a waitress' day.
To begin, I am not the most eloquent speaker. I often slur my words without realizing it.
Anyway, my friends and I went to Red Robin for lunch today. Our waitress was a young girl, probably not a day over 16. She asked if she could start us off with something to... | 19 | 22.105263 | |
1349077670 | 1349100787 | null | t5_2to41 | 97 | drumbtr: TIFU by doing this..[PIC]
[YEAAAHHHHH](http://i.imgur.com/BRvnG.jpg)
Yeah, it sucks ass, the other guy got a cute little dent. Nobody was hurt so that's good.
Mech1: Da fuq did you do?
drumbtr: Hydroplaned into the back of a truck :(
Mech1: Ah, that sucks.
| 4 | 24.25 | |
1349078727 | 1349174176 | null | t5_2to41 | 138 | [deleted]: TIFU By getting unenrolled from high school today.
Alright, so first off, I'm in online school. When I first enrolled I was sent a bunch of tests that Woman told me were optional and to get me used to their test taking format. Well, I just got back from work and checked my E-mail. Turns out I had to get them... | 6 | 23 | |
1349085452 | 1349667766 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | Navevan: TIFU making burgers.
I was making hamburgers at 4 o'clock this morning and it was going well. Prepping, I put salt, pepper, crushed red peppers, hot sauce, and then came the garlic. Now, I don't have a lot of experience with cooking, so when I grabbed the garlic, I grossly overestimated the appropriate amount.... | 6 | 5.5 | |
1349106681 | 1349119558 | null | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: Tifu by making cookies.
Well this wasnt today but a while ago, I was reminded of it by the TIFU Bagel story.
So, theres 15 year old me, quite experienced with cooking, can do Pot noodles, microwave meals and open a tin if I really need to, so baking for the first time should be a breeze. I fancied chocolate... | 7 | 2.142857 | |
1349108479 | 1349192438 | null | t5_2to41 | 439 | copypastesystem: TIFU By Waking Up
I woke up in a great mood and drove my husband to work. All was well at that time until I was on my way back home. On my way home, 2 people at 2 separate intersections ran stop signs and almost hit me. I blew it off and carried on. I then went to meet up with a friend of mine to do ou... | 8 | 54.875 | |
1349149619 | 1349271284 | null | t5_2to41 | 105 | mypoorparents: TIFU by sucking dick.
This weekend I had rebound sex with an old fuck buddy in my home town while visiting with my family. I spent the night at his house, and woke up to more sex and sucking him off. My parents arrived shortly after to pick me up without calling first, so I didn't have time to do anythin... | 5 | 21 | |
1349148783 | 1349157858 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | RoyalBrand: TIFU Got Caught... At Work!
SummoningRaziel: Not sure if I should feel bad or clap.
jedi240: Clap...... Just clap
SummoningRaziel: *slow clap initiated*
strayce: Oh good, that still works.
| 5 | 2.8 | |
1349153291 | 1349496990 | null | t5_2to41 | 84 | GarciaLater: TIFU by blasting shit all over my gf's apartment complex.
This happened a few days ago, but I am just now receiving evidence of it so I am posting today.
So it was my girlfriend's dad's birthday and she had been a huge sweetheart for him by ordering a bunch of hot wings for the Cowboys' game (even though ... | 5 | 16.8 | |
1349135121 | 1349507822 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | Slicker1138: TIFU my Junior Sailor of the Year board...
...by coming to a complete blank on the Sailors Creed...then saying "oh, shit". Even though I nailed the board portion it was a foregone conclusion that I had no chance at it...
2bahKarro: what is a "junior sailor of the year board"?? i am not navy-savvy at all
S... | 4 | 2.5 | |
1349161723 | 1349310167 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | VelveetaBloodfucker: TIFU by eating a fruit roll-up
I was watching Mad Men and I grabbed a fruit roll-up from my snack drawer. I started chewing and felt a pulling sensation in my mouth followed by a piece of something hard in the wad of chewed up candy. I spit it out and plucked a [tooth](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/A... | 7 | 3.714286 | |
1349153543 | 1349219258 | null | t5_2to41 | 18 | Kaboose1442: TIFU by losing my wallet
So tonight i was at a Redbox machine looking for something that my girl and i could watch for the night. Well her friend who just got off work at a restaurant pulled up and we started talking. Well i got very infuriated about what happened to her because her manager apparently didn... | 5 | 3.6 | |
1349188867 | 1349209392 | null | t5_2to41 | 313 | MrFahrenheit200: TIFU and had to jump out of a second story window.
This morning, I proceeded with my normal routine. Except I did ONE thing differently. This ONE thing caused me hell for what I assume will be the rest of the day.
I decided to wash behind my ears.
After my girlfriend left for class, it was just... | 6 | 52.166667 | |
1349190935 | 1349202009 | null | t5_2to41 | 204 | kittypuuuurry: TIFU by opening a bottle of super glue with my teeth.
So, the super glue had closed the whole container shut. I tried piercing it with a knife, and cutting it with scissors. None of that worked, so I tried ripping the tip off with my teeth and it exploded in my mouth. I got it all over my tongue, face, a... | 7 | 29.142857 | |
1349194033 | 1349454194 | null | t5_2to41 | 53 | niyou77: TIFU by editing a picture of my own dick
So you guys know how the new Death Grips album was leaked and how the cover is a picture of a dick with "NO LOVE DEEP WEB" written on it? ([NSFW!](http://cdn.stereogum.com/files/2012/10/Death-Grips-No-Love-Deep-Web-608x608.jpg)) Well, I thought I'd get a little cocky an... | 7 | 7.571429 | |
1349192151 | 1349237842 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | Millerzep: TIFU my car
I have a 2007 Volkswagen GTI. I was driving in to work yesterday when my car engine died. I got out of the car, and there is oil all over the place. Car wouldn't start back up.
I figured the oil was leaking because the oil filter fell apart (or something like that). I got my girlfriend to ... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1349200280 | 1349205235 | null | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU by snorting a massive cloud of Sambar curry
powder.
I was cooking pork chops and wanted to shake on some [sambar powder](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sambar_\(dish\)#Sambar_powder) for seasoning. Apparently the spice rack container was clogged up so when I removed the top to clean up it exploded. I en... | 3 | 5 | |
1349206695 | 1349224368 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | mahalo1984: TIFU by forgetting that I was supposed to go to court today for riding my bicycle on the sidewalk.
Now I'm a fugitive of the state.
squee777: Where is it that you reside where you are not allowed to ride your bike on the sidewalk?
MadDrMatt: I'd assume he lives in the US. Most states don't allow sidewalk... | 5 | 5.2 | |
1349200826 | 1349406974 | null | t5_2to41 | 78 | bellekid: TIFU by mentioning Jolly Ranchers
I was at my campus LGBT group's safe sex meeting last night after being dragged over by my good friends since I'm on the outs with most of the group. Apparently some of our new members are not the brightest apples in the bunch and since I'm a gender studies major they thought... | 7 | 11.142857 | |
1349207998 | 1349231598 | null | t5_2to41 | 53 | [deleted]: TIFU and sent abusive messages to the person who was set to return my phone back to me
I am an absolute idiot. This morning I was out waiting for the bus when I realised my phone and bus pass were missing from my pockets. Remembering that I did definitely bring them with me, I looked around far and wide and ... | 4 | 13.25 | |
1349219747 | 1349302055 | null | t5_2to41 | 27 | galtor2: TIFU: Quit my professional job without other lined up.
Apparently the greatest mistake you can make in 2012/modern times is quit your job. At least that is what I felt like. I thought about quitting for 2 years. And yet there were several dozen people told me to do otherwise. Even the Internet is against m... | 4 | 6.75 | |
1349226463 | 1349283730 | null | t5_2to41 | 519 | PugnaciousJay: TIFU by complaining on the elevator.
Earlier today I got on a crowded elevator in my residence hall with one of my roommates. We were the last ones on, and there were about ten other people standing behind us as the elevator began to ascend. The elevator then stopped on the second floor, much to my dis... | 9 | 57.666667 | |
1349236790 | 1349657588 | null | t5_2to41 | 34 | Quwerkygirl: TIFU: Dropping my iPad down the toilet
Well I was going to the toilet whilst browsing reddit and I was thinking about just putting my iPad on the floor, pulling down my pants and peeing. But no I didn't do that and so I put it under my chin and held it there pushing it against my neck and under my chin but... | 3 | 11.333333 | |
1349245053 | 1349259523 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | Protoman_Eats_Babies: TIFU: I'm an accidental racist (with cats!)
My cat came up to me, and demands to be greeted by his name, so I did, like any other day, except today I decided to actually think about my cat's name for the first time. He is a *black* Persian/Siamese mix.
And as a kid, I named him *Spook.*
Now I un... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1349280125 | 1349283073 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | critter96: TIFU
thelazt1: how do you fuck up peanut butter
critter96: im not sure i was just bored
| 3 | 1.333333 | |
1349282254 | 1349467954 | null | t5_2to41 | 369 | [deleted]: TIFU by insulting a little person
I am a background investigator and have to conduct national security/public trust interviews with people being considered for government jobs. This is usually done at a government/contractor office where the person was just hired, but in some cases they haven't started the j... | 6 | 61.5 | |
1349292512 | 1349308710 | null | t5_2to41 | 24 | Tiskettasket: TIFU trying to close the gate to the dumpster at work.
So there is a metal/wooden gate that hides our dumpster area from public view. Well the business' we share the dumpster with left the gate open as well as a hot mess so I went to close the gate. Problem is it was stuck open. So I'm shoving against it ... | 4 | 6 | |
1349307819 | 1349315483 | null | t5_2to41 | 51 | SpaceMannequin: TIFU by getting my license plate revoked.
I had my car insurance insurance payment coming out of my account automatically every month. Apparently I was short on cash one month so the money didn't go through. My mail was going to my dad's house but I spent most of the summer with my mom since it was clos... | 7 | 7.285714 | |
1349322761 | 1349384427 | null | t5_2to41 | 126 | ATKDragon: TIFU by eating sun flower seeds whole, along with the shells.
Actually, I ate them yesterday, but I'm paying for it today. I've always ate them whole cuz that's how I started eating them as a child (self taught), but yesterday I ate a whole bag which I guess I've never done before. I've never had so much blo... | 6 | 21 | |
1349342859 | 1349541392 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | ballisticks: TIFU a university unit
Actually I fucked up a couple weeks ago.
I'm a second-year English university student. I'm on exchange in Australia for my first semester of the second year. One of my units is Cisco's CCNA1 & 2. I failed to attend the mid-semester exam (stupid mistake, I forgot it was on), and ... | 7 | 2.428571 | |
1349344756 | 1349370176 | null | t5_2to41 | 27 | CapnToker: TIFU by leaving my resume where my boss could find it.
I'm currently considering getting a new job and I used my work computer to print out a very nice resume that I spent a lot of time on. The first copy that printed I didn't like so I set it on top of the shredder to shred before I left work but didn't rea... | 4 | 6.75 | |
1349346214 | 1349438279 | null | t5_2to41 | 105 | imessedupsobad: TIFU I camwhored and didn't get paid. I let my desperation get the best of me.
After 3 years of job searching and applying with no luck, I decided to cam whore myself to an anon on 4chan. Yeah, it's already bad. But he seemed legit and I hoped he'd pay me afterwards like he said he would. And he didn't... | 9 | 11.666667 | |
1349354912 | 1349374906 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by being sick
so I was really sick the last two days I had to call off work. (I was throwing up a lot) my boss didn't believe me so he fired me and well now I need a new job and that isn't easy so I totally fucked up by my boss being a asshole.
prussianiron: I'm pretty sure that's illegal. I would call... | 5 | 1.4 | |
1349361768 | 1358356360 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,198 | WunderOwl: TIFU It's not casual friday, in fact it's not friday at all
but I'm trying to pull it off
Update (12:47pm): One of my coworkers gave me a "Jeans today huh?" Which I responded to with a firm, "Yep." and kept walking. Hiding in my cubical seems to be the safest option.
Update (3:42pm): For anyone still wit... | 14 | 85.571429 | |
1349372241 | 1349441793 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | critter96: TIFU:By smoking salt
I was siiting on my couch playing with myself when i decided i wanted to get high well i go to my stash it was empty so i go look in my cabnet and saw the salt so i packed me a pipe and started to smoke it well it got me high but you will only do it once because it felt like someone was ... | 4 | 0.5 | |
1349381050 | 1349439128 | null | t5_2to41 | 451 | RaptorGoRawr: TIFU by setting my house on fire with my vibrator.
So I work the overnight shift doing tech support and got off work this morning and decided to take care of some needs before going to sleep.
I use a Hitachi Magic Wand that plugs into the wall (who needs batteries?) and did the deed then rolled over and ... | 15 | 30.066667 | |
1349395250 | 1349632880 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | [deleted]: TIFU by correcting a gas station's spelling
For a few months now I have noticed that the gas station that I go to after work misspells the word heights, they spell it hieghts on their receipts. I finally got enough nerve to alert them of their error.
Big mistake.
I told the cashier of the error when she ha... | 4 | 8.75 | |
1349402299 | 1349407749 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | noahward4: TIFU by giving jersey shore a second chance.
[deleted]: Hey, it's ok. We all make mistakes. Just don't do like MTV and keep repeating them.
Jellyman64: You know, a popular phrase around here is that *people who do the same things over and over again and expect different results are crazy*, or something to t... | 4 | 2.5 | |
1349400850 | 1349513538 | null | t5_2to41 | 34 | aroondeep: TIFU trying to fix my laptop
The WiFi in my Samsung laptop suddenly stopped working, with the network connection being stuck at "Indentifying...". So after trying and messing up the network settings, I finally decided to reinstall Windows. This wouldn't be a huge loss, since I got the laptop only the previou... | 5 | 6.8 | |
1349402686 | 1349465636 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | EziosEpic: TIFU by telling a friend about a girl I like.
Today, I decided to tell one of my life long friends (Let's call him Mike) about a girl (Call her Jess) which I had liked for two years (BTW if you say something about why did i not ask her out earlier, i'm kind of chubby) Anyway, I told him about her, how long I... | 3 | 1 | |
1349412469 | 1349467361 | t3_10z3pq | t5_2to41 | 116 | Skylarity: Sorry, but it's "wear".
wanabeswordsman: Give the guy a break, he juggles friggin' chainsaws! He was probably juggling them while typing that comment. What've YOU been doing with YOUR life, huh? Posting on Reddit while *not* juggling chainsaws, that's what.
Full_Of_Win: Shut up you smooth poser. You'll never... | 11 | 10.545455 | |
1349429638 | 1349429888 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | tudayaifakap: TIFU by telling my mother she's gay
My brother's cakeday is today and I texted him earlier this morning "Today is the world's gay day but the officiant is yet to wake up", which is supposed to lead to me wishing him birthday. Accidentally, I keyed in my mother's number, instead of my brother's. And now, m... | 3 | 2 | |
1349456826 | 1349494755 | null | t5_2to41 | 87 | actuallycheetah: TIFU by dropping a fresh Domino's pizza in a cobweb.
Last night, I was home alone and thought Domino's was a good idea. After paying the delivery driver and closing the door, I bump into the wall and the pizza box goes flying, opens up, and the pizza plummets face down into a cobweb that was growing in... | 5 | 17.4 | |
1349461534 | 1349485941 | null | t5_2to41 | 804 | [deleted]: TIFU by taking a hefty dose of pure molly (MDMA) and I forgot I have to go to work in 2 hours... As a server.
I'm rolling my ass off and my pupils are enormous. I forgot I picked up a shift for a coworker and I'll be serving a party of 30 people in just a few hours.... Shit. Too bad I can't wear shades at wo... | 10 | 80.4 | |
1349461657 | 1349499696 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | crazysoundsgood: TIFU by waking up 2.5 hours late for work.
I work in New York City which is about 45 minutes away from where I live. My work starts at 9, I woke up at 10:33.
And it was to be a particularly busy day.
GeneticDream: But you're there now on Reddit?
crazysoundsgood: had to go to a bs quarterly meeting...... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1349489983 | 1350201637 | null | t5_2to41 | 21 | 17Hongo: TIFU by screwing things up with a girl at a bar. Yeah - that.
I'm sure we've all been there. This subreddit is one that names itself as "a subreddit for the dumbass in all of us", and I'm certain that many of us are at the peak of our dumbassery when presented with the combination of alcohol and an attractive... | 7 | 3 | |
1349469542 | 1349497768 | null | t5_2to41 | 18 | [deleted]: TIFU by spoiling Breaking Bad for a friend
Well, last night actually. Obviously Breaking Bad spoilers ahead.
My buddy and I decided to grab a nice bottle of scotch, as has become a weekly tradition between us. When buying the bottle we ran into my neighbor so we decided to head back to his place for a few ... | 3 | 6 | |
1349491101 | 1349507169 | null | t5_2to41 | 39 | [deleted]: TIFU by rushing a public restroom poop session.
This is a long story, there is a TL;DR at the bottom. Let me start off by saying that I am a senior in college, and generally I avoid pooping in public restrooms like I avoid watching episodes of Jersey Shore. However, with 4 hour gaps between classes, my body... | 4 | 9.75 | |
1349502515 | 1350053122 | null | t5_2to41 | 54 | TheTrouseredApe: TIFU by telling a wheelchair-bound man how nice the pool felt
I was swimming in the community pool by myself because it was a hot day. A wheelchair-bound man from the neighborhood rolls up on the other side of the fence. Being pleasant, I wave and say hello. He returns the wave and asks how I am. Not t... | 5 | 10.8 | |
1349531647 | 1349563165 | null | t5_2to41 | 412 | iwasfuuckedup: TIFU UPDATE: I took molly and went to work last night.
Ok... Lemme first off say I WAS FUCKED UP! Super irritated and feeling great at the same time, i got to work on time. My party came early and my table wasn't prepared. The hostess and I hustled our asses off to set the table up while they waited. The... | 16 | 25.75 | |
1349542683 | 1349548703 | null | t5_2to41 | 128 | MidgetFetish: TIFU and turned my girl into a zombie
Things got hot and heavy, so I was on top making out with her. It had been a few minutes, I hadn't opened my eyes. She gently pushed me off and was like 'babe...". I open my eyes.
Holy shit, her face was smeared with blood. For who knows (and who would want to?) how ... | 4 | 32 |
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