start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1350489450 | 1350583133 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: Restroom Confusion
NeoMilitant: Why were you in a hospital waiting room for 3 days?
VinF: My mother-in-law is dying.
NeoMilitant: Ahh, that sucks. I thought it was just from terrible service. I know most people will offer condolences and hope they pull through, I'll instead say I'm sure she's lived a full ... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1350496913 | 1350505976 | null | t5_2to41 | 228 | friedspacecakes: TIFU by making my friend drink windshield de-icer on his birthday.
So, before i start this. Let me say that it was a complete and honest accident. A group of us (about 9 or 10) were having a bonfire for my friends birthday. Couple bottles of vodka, nothing to special. Well. A couple other people were ... | 7 | 32.571429 | |
1350517179 | 1350991949 | null | t5_2to41 | 323 | Donkey-boner: TIFU by going to the wrong lecture and sitting in the middle of everyone
I sat right in the middle and have been here for about half an hour
I have been asked a couple questions and got them very wrong
zoter: this is exactly how [this started](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PAtFsJY5q0)
Gr8WhiteGrammarNa... | 7 | 46.142857 | |
1350514344 | 1350751535 | null | t5_2to41 | 51 | MoralSupportFalcon: TIFU a task my 9 year old sister could have handled.
(To be clear, this was a fuck-up that occurred recently. I only now found this subreddit.) I just started working for a fast food joint. It's a small local business in Louisiana. It was my first night shift and I wasn't very familiar with the inne... | 6 | 8.5 | |
1350529712 | 1350534225 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | gslangley_3: TIFU by applying Icyhot to my genitals. ALL OVER my genitals.
[deleted]: Good grief that couldn't have been fun. Can I ask how/why this happened?
gslangley_3: because we're stupid college freshman living in a dorm. too much liquor and testosterone
[deleted]: Haha ok. I'm going to guess you were testing... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1350528709 | 1350555844 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | 12345dhooves: TIFU By leaving the cat door open and sleeping
happened yesterday after the swat raided my house trying to get a crazy individual out of my house, i forgot to close the door. Needless to say, this is the hundredth time this specific cat did this. wondering if he will come back :(
NarwhalAttack: Dafuq am ... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1350527759 | 1350618624 | null | t5_2to41 | 30 | workpoliticssuck: TIFU by getting involved in workplace drama
Let me preface by saying that there are some girls in my training class at my new job that seem to treat our work environment like high school.
Today I was joking with some coworkers about one coworker's outfit choice today (he looked like he was going sail... | 4 | 7.5 | |
1350541426 | 1350581875 | null | t5_2to41 | 63 | [deleted]: TIFU tattooing an ex that I'm trying any, and everything to get back in with
So, the girl I've been crazy about for 2 years, an ex, has been giving me chances to make up for being a complete dumb ass. I'm a professional tattoo artist, so I give her a deal on some tattoos, after sweating the whole thing the l... | 4 | 15.75 | |
1350552630 | 1350603090 | null | t5_2to41 | 84 | [deleted]: TIFU- didn't get her number... or even her name.
Well this sucks. Went to a new gym (rock climbing gym) because mine had some technical difficulties (power was out) and met this really cool girl as I was getting ready in the common area. Talked a bit and she seemed like a chill, down to Earth person. Someone... | 5 | 16.8 | |
1350563558 | 1350586787 | null | t5_2to41 | 218 | throwaway_drunkard: TIFU (YIFU) by getting blackout drunk and going to my therapy session anyway
I do not even know the full extent to which I've fucked everything up. Mostly because I don't remember much if anything.
SiggiHD: drunk men speak truth. not a fuck-up. your doctor had a touch on your inner core. good job.... | 7 | 31.142857 | |
1350560816 | 1350643000 | null | t5_2to41 | 56 | ML90: TIFU by downloading some images from Getty
I'm interning at an agency and was asked to get some images for a client's site. I was meant to be using samples from thinkstock (for which we have a subscription) but i pulled some off Getty, and actually downloaded a couple, not realising we pay for those individually.... | 4 | 14 | |
1350544841 | 1350596359 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU my friends' day.
Today I was with 2 friends. We smoked a bowl outside at one of our friend's house (girl) and then my (guy) friend and I left. We hung out all day and had a crazy adventure. Then we went back to her house at 10:45 because she said we'd hang out later. Her step-dad comes out and starts ta... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1350568756 | 1350653441 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU and dumped a pile of bricks into my neighbor's driveway
I put out my trash to be taken today, and it must have fallen over this morning while I was at work.
I think it's best explained by her email to my landlord (I can't say I blame her, since she doesn't have my contact info):
>Can you please let... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1350583393 | 1350584575 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | knuckles352: TIFU by forgetting a 5 month anniversary.
My girlfriend is annoyed at me because I forgot our anniversary.
I should mention my girlfriend is always really excited about anniversarys...and i've remembered in the past.
[deleted]: Run, 5months is nothing that you should have to remember. You diddent fuck up b... | 4 | 2.5 | |
1350585419 | 1350590958 | null | t5_2to41 | 239 | [deleted]: TIFU- Threw a used condom in my GFs mothers face.
Her parents went gambling for the weekend. I stayed the weekend at her house and was going to leave Sunday night since they were getting back Monday morning. Turns out they blew their money and had to come home early.
Me and the GF are in the parents bed ha... | 6 | 39.833333 | |
1350586370 | 1350677318 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | luftwaffles1337: One week after leg accident.
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/117lsm/tifu_when_i_tried_to_jump_up_on_a_2_foot_high/ (Day after accident)
http://i.imgur.com/RmXwF.jpg (One week later)
letmeonreddit: erm...i think this is in the wrong place
skatterbug: This is an update to another TIFU. It's just ... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1350589447 | 1350699257 | null | t5_2to41 | 69 | katlmaowtf: TIFU by answering a call from a number I didn't recognize.
I used to work at a convenience store with this guy that seemed pretty okay. He's from India and their idea of creepy is a little different than ours apparently..
I knew him about 3 years prior to working with him. My mom works at the same store so... | 10 | 6.9 | |
1350591402 | 1350616852 | null | t5_2to41 | 24 | [deleted]: My Bosses Now Know My Reddit Username
eosha: ...and you put your work as the shipping address?
Cacoo: i've done it. if you are really excited for your SecretSanta gift and are at work all the time, you don't think twice about having your gift shipped to your work instead of your home, as someone will defini... | 3 | 8 | |
1350606761 | 1350725497 | null | t5_2to41 | 76 | fuck-my-life: TIFU I pissed all over my pants while taking a shit in public
I'm on a club/team at my university that was competing with other schools at a regional event. For one of the events, contestants performed one at a time while the rest who were waiting to go were kept locked up in a classroom so we couldn't di... | 7 | 10.857143 | |
1350624309 | 1351217229 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | Khaki_Shorts: TIFU By mixing up an address of a grocery story with another one on the same main street, causing me to miss the part-time job final interview/training. I'm a college student.
There are two of said grocery stores, one is on one city right on the border and the other is on the other city. I was so sure it... | 5 | 6.2 | |
1350617091 | 1350688116 | null | t5_2to41 | 56 | aaron7293: TIFU By inadvertently allowing a blind guy to run into a door.
As I was approaching the building my class was in I noticed through the glass door a blind guy exiting the building. They are double doors and he got through the first one just fine, but as he got closer to the second I figured he would be fine ... | 3 | 18.666667 | |
1350645894 | 1350648352 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | pundi: TIFU by falling in love with a girl i don't know anything about.
mattymck: not really a TIFU, and you dont actually love her, you are just infatuated.
writermonk: Or perhaps in lust.
| 3 | 1.333333 | |
1350680568 | 1350685690 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | Fred-931: TIFU - Reddit bullshit.
[deleted]: Those wheels are a PITA man, way to go.
Fred-931: Swiffer dusting cloths work very well for getting off the stuff that isn't baked on yet.
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1350619122 | 1350909228 | null | t5_2to41 | 38 | camstavon: TIFU, by nearly lighting KFC on fire.
I work at KFC, and while cleaning a fryer I forgot to turn it off. So I left it to drain and went to fill my jug. When I got back, there was smoke everywhere and people rushing to turn off the fryer. Luckily the manager realised I am new so let me off with a warning.
poo... | 5 | 7.6 | |
1350685391 | 1350688750 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | UCF_FINatic: You think you had a shitty night?!?
canipaybycheck: Hi UFC_FINactic,
Could you please repost this with "TIFU" in the title according to rule 1 in our sidebar? Thanks!
UCF_FINatic: Yeah, sorry. I'm still relatively new here. Do I just repost the entire post? Like copy and paste (but with the new title)?
... | 6 | 2.666667 | |
1350688792 | 1350913571 | null | t5_2to41 | 400 | [deleted]: TIFU You think you had a shitty night?!?
As a professional student I don't get to go out and party that much. Last night, my roommates (also professional students) wanted to go out. We start pregaming at our place with Crown and some Beer (seperately). Fast forward until early this morning:
I wake up and my... | 10 | 40 | |
1350698026 | 1350766258 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | theonewiththeface: TIFU by giving myself food poisoning.
Tonight for supper, I made my husband and myself some baked chicken parmesan. It consisted of breaded chicken, pasta, cheese and pasta sauce. While eating it, I thought mine tasted off and kept going because it was fully cooked.
Approximately 15 minutes later,... | 4 | 3.5 | |
1350704334 | 1351251531 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | AndIShitMyPants: TIFU and shit my pants after dinner.
So there I was, standing in the city streets with my family. We just finished dinner at a local BBQ place, when suddenly I had the urge to let a small toot out. But it wasn't a toot. I stood there and felt the warm type seven stool trickle down my thighs. I told my ... | 5 | 6.2 | |
1350708434 | 1350781929 | null | t5_2to41 | 24 | acidiclust: TIFU - I almost lit the bathroom on fire at a pizza joint in Monterey, CA
My boyfriend and I went to Monterey for my birthday. We really wanted to try out this nice looking Italian place, but they wouldn't give us a table, or let us put down our names to come back later for a table.
So we're both pretty g... | 3 | 8 | |
1350711092 | 1351122148 | null | t5_2to41 | 25 | goddamngloves: TIFU by stealing a pair of 99 cent gloves and getting caught by store security - now I have a record
First time idiot thief. My bank account was way overdrawn, I didn't have enough change, and I made a stupid, impulsive decision to take this pair of gloves that I needed for a project. Turns out, I was ... | 13 | 1.923077 | |
1350715765 | 1350842164 | null | t5_2to41 | 120 | penisbot112: TIFU trying to get hard
So I'm a virgin and went on craigslist to find someone to stick it in. I finally found a girl who seemed legit and wanted my dick. I had a huge fear of premature ejaculation and I was certain it would happen to me. In order to make sure I wouldn't jump the gun too early, I masturbat... | 6 | 20 | |
1350744287 | 1350756793 | null | t5_2to41 | 239 | canipaybycheck: 40,000!
Congratulations /r/tifu, we've reached 40,000 subscribers!
Your friendly neighborhood mod team would like to ask you:
Do you have any suggestions for this subreddit? (The Fuck-Up of the Week was suggested in the past, and was implemented) Do you have any questions or concerns? Please post in t... | 6 | 39.833333 | |
1350756838 | 1350776305 | null | t5_2to41 | 489 | Thelonius_Dunk: TIFU- Unintentionally invited myself to an all lesbian party last night.
Me and this girl I work with decide to go to one of the bigger clubs in the city after the rest of our coworkers flaked on us.
Once we get inside, we dance a bit on the first floor, then decide to go upstairs.
Usually its only $... | 8 | 61.125 | |
1350763587 | 1350775707 | null | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: TIFU: Got caught making parking pass counterfeits. I have 1 day to decide what to do.
So on Reddit I've seen a few posts where people have gotten into SERIOUS shit for making fake parking passes. If reported to the police, in some states, they can charge you with fraud or forgery, which is a felony. Does any... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1350768686 | 1350922698 | null | t5_2to41 | 237 | DrJFZoidberg: TIFU By forgetting about a threesome.
Need a throwaway? Why not Zoidberg
I went out drinking in the university halls by where I live and got completely off my face, I don't remember much of the evening.
What I do remember was waking up in my underpants with an unfamiliar bed, with an attractive woman in... | 4 | 59.25 | |
1350815528 | 1350822618 | t3_11ts0x | t5_2to41 | -27 | cuntycamille: And your comment is really assy.
Kabibbles: Wow, Clever, Looks like we have another "first date, lets mate" types over here.
cuntycamille: Looks like we have another "judgmental asshole who makes assumptions" type over here.
Kabibbles: Yours didn't even rhyme, get outa here kid.
cuntycamille: I didn't in... | 8 | -3.375 | |
1350787155 | 1350978069 | null | t5_2to41 | 36 | Metalsutton: TIFU - Sat on 2-litre bottle of milk, exploding it all over my car.
I'll keep it short and sweet.
So I had just finished shopping at the supermarket. I was packing the groceries in the car, including the front passenger seat. I for some reason decided to put the milk on the drivers seat while I was deali... | 4 | 9 | |
1350791867 | 1364697006 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,292 | BamboolessPanda: TIFU by watching "The Big Lebowski."
15 minutes ago I was enjoying a wonderful bowl of Coco Puffs and watching The Big Lebowski. I was watching it on my laptop. Lebowski entered his apartment and then two guys jumped him. Being the first time I've seen the movie, I didn't expect it and was startled. I... | 11 | 117.454545 | |
1350791731 | 1350835115 | null | t5_2to41 | 81 | [deleted]: TIFU... By Scaring my Cat Into a Bowl of Piss
Soo... The sink my bathroom isn't working.You have to use the kitchen sink. I had just took a leak, and I guess I forgot to flush. Big mistake. I was walking by the bathroom, and I saw my cat on the edge of the seat. I hissed, and he got so scared, he fell in. He... | 5 | 16.2 | |
1350810280 | 1350812254 | t3_11u60r | t5_2to41 | 6 | blackeyethrow: generalisation on my part as I don't watch that genre of tv, other half watches it almost exclusively, real house wives etc etc
Legion299: Laptop in the eye? What
blackeyethrow: yes, like a discus
Edit: unsure if ultimately my eye or laptop won.
Legion299: I really don't understand why people watches "... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1350813002 | 1350965680 | null | t5_2to41 | 18 | Chateetcho: TIFU By having a customer purchase a phone he already paid for.
I work for a company that indirectly sells Cell Phones for many different carriers. We have our own Insurance plan that we offer instead of the ones available through the respective Cell Phone Service Providers.
A customer came in today (10/2... | 5 | 3.6 | |
1350834429 | 1350871820 | null | t5_2to41 | 78 | TheBozo: TIFU by grinding with a black girl, and consequently tearing my MCL.
I was at the club last night. Had a few drinks and decided to hit the dance floor with some friends. Some African American girl walked over to me and started grinding extremely hard. I tried to keep up as she "went low" and while continuin... | 5 | 15.6 | |
1350837133 | 1350948557 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: Tifu by waking up late to my first day of working and probably getting fired for it.
I needed to wake up at 5 this morning because I needed to be at work by 6 for my first day of training. I laid in bed for 3 hours just trying to fall asleep but I was too nervous for the next day.
I woke up and got to work... | 10 | 1 | |
1350833342 | 1350864585 | null | t5_2to41 | 155 | [deleted]: TIFU Drinking... I don't even know the story yet
I'm not sure how I got so trashed last night. Normally if I stick to beer I'm good to go all night. I know I had 1 mixed drink last night, the rest was shitty beer and beer pong, which is well within my normal limit.
Well, I woke up today covered in my own ... | 10 | 15.5 | |
1350850401 | 1350903517 | null | t5_2to41 | 567 | tifuthrowaway1994: TIFUpdate to "TIFU by ignoring my doctor's advice"
[Original post](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/11ts0x/tifu_by_ignoring_my_doctors_advice_nsfw/): Thanks ~~to most of you~~ for your replies! Edit: I'm in a really fucking good mood right now. No comments ruffled my feathers.
So there I was, c... | 6 | 94.5 | |
1350860064 | 1351058359 | null | t5_2to41 | 63 | throwawayoilfield: TIFU by turning down a high paying job.
I get woken up to my cousin calling. I answer the phone and he tells me he has a job for me. He tells me that he found me a job. That it's just a welders hand. Basically just grinding the cuts to a smooth finish. I tell him not because the last job he got ... | 11 | 5.727273 | |
1350874330 | 1350917184 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | [deleted]: TIFU- Went into bfs facebook, he has login notifications activated
I go to facebook.com and he was the last one who had logged in so his email was there. I didn't intentionally want to creep but I just kinda felt compelled to guess his password... I guessed it right away. The worse part is I don't even have... | 6 | 3.666667 | |
1350882775 | 1350922887 | null | t5_2to41 | 132 | [deleted]: TIFU By falling in the litter box, butt naked.
This seriously happened less than an hour ago. I undressed and stepped into the shower, turned the water on and waited for it to heat up a little. As I was reaching for the shower head to direct the stream of lukewarm water toward my nekkid body, I noticed I for... | 3 | 44 | |
1350881236 | 1350887131 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidentally inviting my sister to go see professional wrestling with me
So I'm a big fan of the WWE, and my dad told me today that he got 4 tickets to a live event on the 21st of January, and that I should find 2 more people to bring. My first pick was my older brother, he lives 2 hours away, and I ... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1350921764 | 1350926489 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU been caught stealing from work, have not told parents...
Was called into the office Saturday was suspended on the spot while they investigate. i go back tomorrow too see whats going too happen, i know im fired and i have told my mum and dad the same. My dad is saying hes going too get solicitors involve... | 6 | 1.166667 | |
1350926074 | 1351034942 | null | t5_2to41 | 75 | kslaven: TIFU The quintessential Freudian slip
This actually happened less than a year ago.
**Background** So I use to hang out with these two girls in High School. By the time we all graduated they both were in serious relationships. We all split up for college, I grew up in a rural area and moved into the inner city... | 7 | 10.714286 | |
1350953995 | 1351007054 | null | t5_2to41 | 42 | Kyzanator: Why don't we have "TIAFU" (Today I almost fucked up) on here as well as TIFU for close calls?
Just a suggestion...
WinterCharm: It's a great idea. I actually just tried to create the subreddit /r/closecalls for sharing lucky stories and almost-disasters that were averted.
Sadly, /r/closecalls and /r/closeca... | 3 | 14 | |
1350861582 | 1351449936 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | vgulla: TIFU by daydreaming and turning it into reality
This morning, my dad woke me up at 5 in the morning, and said that he wanted to take me to help him with his dry cleaning, because there were a lot of clothes to be washed and picked up. So I'm waiting in the car, daydreaming about calling my dad an ass and a lot ... | 4 | 5.75 | |
1350963031 | 1351021134 | null | t5_2to41 | 260 | The_Tolfdir: TIFU By Telling An Amputee He Looked Like a Starfish
For clarification, this happened last Sunday.
I was taking my morning walk by the beach and noticed a man who I thought was buried in the sand. I couldn't see his arms or legs, but I figured they had been covered with sand by his kids.
I walked over a... | 5 | 52 | |
1350973711 | 1351051417 | null | t5_2to41 | 611 | worriedaboutroommate: TIFU and almost kissed my roommate (but pussied out)
So I've been living with my roommate roughly 7 months now. She's a very attractive woman. She's smart, funny, gorgeous, and has a body to kill for. We've become really close friends, and naturally (as idiots are wont to do) I've fallen for her. ... | 13 | 47 | |
1350972018 | 1351892505 | null | t5_2to41 | 18 | jamesah2008: TIFU by getting into a political debate with right wing nutjobs on facebook. Now I feel sickened knowing what kind of morons I have as friends.
Just ranting. I'm more libertarian leaning but I generally like everything political to be fact based and can accept legitimate criticism at any time. Political di... | 4 | 4.5 | |
1350999637 | 1351007370 | null | t5_2to41 | 67 | [deleted]: TIFU (YIFU) by opening a fresh surgery wound.
**Backstory :** About 6 months ago, I was receiving oral from a girl, and she bit me right on the frenulum (that's the string that goes from the foreskin to the head). It didn't heal completely, so I had to get a surgery (frenuloplasty). I got the surgery last we... | 3 | 22.333333 | |
1350991422 | 1351021066 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | PhatDaddy420: IFUAWA by kneeing this blind midget on the forehead...
Prepare_To_Be_Woo-ed: I'm in suspense not knowing if the chocolate bar and drink managed to hold you over for a few hours.
PhatDaddy420: It helped take the edge off.. After 9 hours of running around and not eating, a chocolate bar stops you from murd... | 5 | 7 | |
1351020513 | 1351122181 | null | t5_2to41 | 128 | [deleted]: TIFU and now my boss thinks I was taking dick pics/poop pics.
So. I was in the restroom at work. I was taking my traditional after lunch dump. I proceeded to take my phone out of my pocket and check my twitter. I slide the screen down to refresh the page and guess what....the noise the twitter app makes w... | 3 | 42.666667 | |
1351020677 | 1351062481 | null | t5_2to41 | 133 | [deleted]: TIFU (Friday actually/I'm a girl by the way) and shared a kiss with my friend after she told me she had a crush on me.
So she knows that before i was married to my husband my dating pool consisted of women.
she was getting us some beers from her mini fridge in her closet and calledme in. (commence jokes a... | 3 | 44.333333 | |
1351025049 | 1351026942 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU elbowing a girls boob
I deeply regretted it.
KE7CKI: How'd you fuck that up? In a quick, single motion force your elbow into the left or right breast of a woman. That simple.
TFiPW: Can you redirect me to the proper subreddit then?
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1351007842 | 1351045143 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU and now my kitchen smells like burning rubber
I was making coffee with a Moka Pot this morning, still half asleep. After a while I got impatient for the caffeinated nectar of life and opened the top of the pot to see if any had finished brewing. At this point, I noticed that the plastic handle was a b... | 3 | 3 | |
1351029531 | 1351053580 | null | t5_2to41 | 91 | NEWSBOT3: tifu by trying to upgrade my week old computer and now it doesnt work anymore
i emailed the supplier, but they'll almost certainly tell me that it was my own stupid fault and i'll have to buy $500 of parts to fix it myself :(
(if anyone is curious, the fans were too noisy, so i put a new cpu heatsink/fan on,... | 6 | 15.166667 | |
1351023982 | 1357177867 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,395 | Stellarce: TIFU By not checking my outfit before I left
I just got a new skirt and was really excited to wear it. The fabric was a little thin but it's also dark red so I didn't think I had to worry about anything. Unfortunately, wearing black panties with a bright pink MUST HAVE written across the butt was poor taste.... | 9 | 155 | |
1351025879 | 1351142943 | null | t5_2to41 | 95 | sandman369: TIFU by quitting without having another job secured.
I have a few offers in the process, but nothing actually confirmed yet. I've been planning to quit for a month or so now, and today I just couldn't take it anymore. Fuck my anxiety and weakness. Fuuuuck.
Just hoping one of these 3 good offers comes throu... | 7 | 13.571429 | |
1351045295 | 1351060381 | null | t5_2to41 | 28 | datasswasphat: [NSFW?] TIFU by falling off my bed post-breast reduction surgery and now I have a nasty green bruise (damn you, iPhone 4 camera for not taking good pics in low light) on my left breast. Fucking OUCH.
http://i.imgur.com/9dtmE.jpg
It hurts like a motherfucker. (And I really hope it isn't infected/fucked u... | 4 | 7 | |
1351048941 | 1351051021 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | worriedaboutroommate: Update: Almost kissed my roommate
izelkay: My nigga
worriedaboutroommate: [My nigga](http://i.imgur.com/RWrx5.jpg)
| 3 | 2.666667 | |
1351057185 | 1351136990 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,055 | worriedaboutroommate: TIFUpdate: I almost kissed my roommate
So [from this post](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/11xmu9/tifu_and_almost_kissed_my_roommate_but_pussied_out/) I saw everyone said to just go for it. It's a complicated living situation, hence my resistance, but since the near-kiss I've felt regret, ra... | 8 | 131.875 | |
1351068195 | 1351163412 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | StandingUpForSelf: TIFU, I stood up for myself to a coworker but I feel like a paranoid bitch
I've had a coworker who has bad people skills, is selfish, doesn't empathize, and has done odd things that favor him at the expense of me in front of our boss. I once considered him a friend, but not so sure after working toge... | 8 | 2.125 | |
1351106637 | 1351201357 | null | t5_2to41 | 572 | ttc02: TIFU and cheated on my wife
I love my wife. I love her more than anything. We've been together for over a decade. Been through miscarriages and conception hell. Have a beautiful daughter together. But our sex life sucks. Ever since the first miscarriage it sucked. Except when we were trying to conceive. Then she... | 13 | 44 | |
1351125920 | 1351139736 | null | t5_2to41 | 18 | blackburn1990: TIFU I entered the friend zone(?)
So after 3 years of trying to get with one girl (yes it's sad, but she's worth it) I decided that I'd try to go out with another girl. After about a month of hanging out and flirting, I asked out the second girl.
We've been dating for about two months, and I've talked to... | 3 | 6 | |
1351141766 | 1351445245 | t3_121ex8 | t5_2to41 | 13 | catcradle5: Why.
CaptainVulva: Some men just want to watch le world burn.
TIFU_Rage_Comics: [Indeed.](http://knowyourmeme.com/photos/184547-some-men-just-want-to-watch-the-world-burn)
Tehok: I like you, but I only like you ironically.
TIFU_Rage_Comics: ...
okay
| 5 | 2.6 | |
1351127146 | 1352060299 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | funkypartyweasel: TIFU: Stood on my best friends 6 month old daughter.Chaos ensued
I was getting ready to go out for a meal with friends and family and needed to use the mirror in my living room. What I didn't realize or see was my God Daughter lying down on a changing mat post-change underneath the mirror. Chaos ensue... | 6 | 5.5 | |
1351134036 | 1351156573 | null | t5_2to41 | 144 | AndyD418: TIFU by peeing in the shower...
I tend to multitask in the shower. Obviously I shower but sometimes I pee, brush my teeth, and so on.
TIFU by peeing in the shower while trying to brush my teeth. I guess there was too many things going on at the same time and my toothbrush slipped out of my hand. Not only did... | 6 | 24 | |
1351142588 | 1355598772 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU By listening to my parents.
So I'm 14 I admit it. I was doing my homework, procrastinating a little but then I finished my homework. The next day it gets a D. I'm like meh but my parents are "Stop playing games and review." And I'm like okay and I tell my parents that I have a science quiz tomorrow and ... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1351145250 | 1354887883 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,628 | stuck_at_starbucks: TIFU and put my bare ass on my manager's face. (NSFW)
In my club, the bar is connected to the stage so you can walk around the bar and collect tips. There's a handrail six feet over the bar so you have something to hold onto while you're up there. I figured out pretty quick that the handrail will ea... | 9 | 180.888889 | |
1351150615 | 1351153782 | null | t5_2to41 | 34 | 13l00dyHell: TIFU by having skype sex and bleeding all over the big finale.
So basically i'm an idiot. My boyfriend and I are on long distance but I will be seeing him in less than 2 weeks after 4 months of not seeing him. Well in all the time we have been together (Almost 2 years and i've known him for 5) he's never... | 6 | 5.666667 | |
1351198589 | 1351486152 | null | t5_2to41 | 228 | kcc1133: TIFU and probably ruined some girl's day
This happened a few days ago, but I just found this sub-reddit today and figured I would share it.
Anyway, I'm in college, and Monday is my hell day, where I have 4 classes in a row, starting at 9:30 and stretching until 3. I had a history midterm in my last class of ... | 9 | 25.333333 | |
1351199436 | 1352902340 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | gagagregory: TIFU by discovering r/todayifuckedup
Killed my entire afternoon...
FappingAsYouReadThis: I don't know, man, some of the shit on here is pretty entertaining. Plus, when *you* inevitably fuck up, you'll have a place where you can vent and have people make you feel better. That's pretty cool, right?
gagagrego... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1351210959 | 1351359976 | null | t5_2to41 | 160 | [deleted]: TIFU by trapping a herd of animals in my back yard
There are many deer in my neighborhood. The other day I was talking to my neighbor who said he never saw them. The next morning just before 5 a.m I went into the back yard to take a piss and saw a few deer. The backyard is fenced and gated with 6 foot fences... | 6 | 26.666667 | |
1351210946 | 1351345112 | null | t5_2to41 | 190 | [deleted]: TIFU by shifting into reverse while going 40mph downhill
Also: TIL that new transmissions are expensive.
twohandedhandshake: went for 4th gear and went to reverse instead?
[deleted]: Yup.
PinkyShin08: Not to sound like a dick, but how does one get R mixed up with 4? In all possible layouts of gears I've seen... | 8 | 23.75 | |
1351213281 | 1351477840 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | feelsbadfred: TIFU and maybe overdrafted someone's bank account
So today, I made a booboo. A friend called me up and asked me to bring her something to eat at work. I stopped by, she gave me her debit card and her subway card and said to use the points on her card for a free sub, and I could get myself something small ... | 5 | 4.6 | |
1351215697 | 1351247369 | null | t5_2to41 | 66 | bored-guy: TIFU by snorting scotch up my nose.
I was enjoying a nice scotch, browsing reddit, when I stumbled upon [this link](http://i.imgur.com/SwPAY.jpg), titled "The elusive domesticated silverback gorilla," or something to that effect.
I made an involuntary snort of a laugh, whilst holding a portion of the whisk... | 3 | 22 | |
1351226957 | 1351631739 | null | t5_2to41 | 208 | AyaneForever: TIFU by misinterpreting a customer's groceries
I should give a little backstory. I'm a cashier at a grocery store, and I was on the clock during Homecoming weekend. Most of the people coming through the line was carrying typical after homecoming party food, like pizza, cheetos, and generally unhealthy sna... | 24 | 8.666667 | |
1351201591 | 1358956635 | null | t5_2to41 | 133 | worriedaboutroommate: TIFUpdate 2: I almost kissed my roommate
[Oh, hey, it's me](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/11zrdc/tifupdate_i_almost_kissed_my_roommate/)
The short story is we fucked. It was pretty awesome.
The long story is I came home from work, and she was reading on the couch. I walked over to her, g... | 9 | 14.777778 | |
1351213409 | 1363502570 | null | t5_2to41 | 11 | karKitten: TIFU and broke a friendship
we met here on reddit and over time we've become more close than any irl friendship I've ever known.
I have my own issues, my dad died in service and my mom is a recovering alcoholic, and the only girlfriend I ever had dipped out on us over stupid reasons. I'm also from a certai... | 5 | 2.2 | |
1351247032 | 1351402246 | null | t5_2to41 | 244 | throwaway9358: TIFU and absolutely flipped shit in front of 30 people.
It was just a bad day today. But I'll skip all that and just tell you about my most humiliating moment and what pushed me to break.
My friend is a big fan of Doctor Who. If I hear that it was a good episode I usually watch it, but I don't consider ... | 4 | 61 | |
1351246588 | 1351361550 | null | t5_2to41 | 47 | bobchq: TIFU by stepping on a nest of red army ants.
About an hour ago, I decided to take one of my dogs for a walk. He got so excited that he started sniffing everything around him and marking his territory with his pee.
As I was holding his leash, I felt some intense stinging on my left foot and only then did I rea... | 6 | 7.833333 | |
1351256522 | 1351379047 | null | t5_2to41 | 69 | Pandumonium1: TIFU by kissing my dream girl
Name says it all, I took a chance after we'd cuddled and it felt right. She said the opposite. Things had been going so great. I feel like shit now. I don't think it would have bothered me so much if I hadn't turned down the last girl for this one. I hope I can find the silve... | 6 | 11.5 | |
1351256424 | 1351511716 | null | t5_2to41 | 46 | GravyMaster: TIFU by pissing my girlfriends bed. Shit.
So I just got back from my girlfriends dorm room (college freshman). I've been sleeping over there almost every night since we started dating on the 1st of Oct. Everything's been going very well and I really like this girl and we've both stated how badly we want th... | 4 | 11.5 | |
1351260211 | 1351509032 | null | t5_2to41 | 103 | tifu_idiot: TIFU by changing a light bulb
So the light bulb went out in my apartment's living room. It's a ceiling light fixture. I'm a short girl and afraid of heights. So with my legs shaking and my cats bemusedly watching, I whimpered as I stood on my stepladder. The light fixture consists of a large dome and a scre... | 5 | 20.6 | |
1351266557 | 1351373897 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,057 | Fioricascastle: TIFU and told my boss I was going to rub one out in the bathroom.
I was at a Marriot for a huge conference with all of the bigwigs in my company as well as peer managers. About 300 people in total. At the tail-end of a 10-minute break I realized I should go pee before we are stuck in conference again fo... | 10 | 105.7 | |
1351271051 | 1351589321 | null | t5_2to41 | 147 | firesquasher: TIFU by yelling "nein nein nein!" while unknowingly transporting a holocaust survivor in my ambulance.
So yeah, I'm driving my ambulance as emt's normally do on the way to the hospital. Our patient, an already aggravated old man was being brought to the hospital for passing out at his assisted living faci... | 5 | 29.4 | |
1351304882 | 1351437954 | null | t5_2to41 | 375 | Frylok1177: TIFU by crushing my boss with a car.
I work for an automotive repair shop and while bringing in a car knowing that it had no brake pedal at all because of a rusted brake line I was using the E brake to drive it in.Theres a little bump on the lifts at work so I gave the car a little bit of gas just to crippl... | 10 | 37.5 | |
1351305453 | 1352905110 | null | t5_2to41 | 55 | WinterCharm: FUCKUP FRIDAYS - Tell Reddit about your worst culinary disasters!
Fuckup Fridays were something I proposed to the mods, and they liked it.
So, for tonight, tell me about your worst culinary disasters. This could be related to cooking, serving, eating, or anything else that has to do with food.
I once s... | 10 | 5.5 | |
1351310026 | 1351631770 | null | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU my chances of passing calculus.
Last night I had plenty of time to study for my calculus exam but I blew it off knowing that we'd go over the review in my study group today in the hours leading up to the test. I wasn't nearly prepared enough for the test and ended up only finishing half of the problems.... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1351347678 | 1351481709 | null | t5_2to41 | 410 | Dentonhere: TIFU by getting blind drunk.
first post to reddit, but it seems appropriate.
so today i got offered to go to a party with a girl ive been texting for a few weeks, we've met a couple of times before just as friends but god knows how i managed to get her to agree to body shots before this party.
we ended up ... | 8 | 51.25 | |
1351397117 | 1351555113 | null | t5_2to41 | 52 | Bellicose_Engineer: TIFU By Utilizing Violence to Solve Problem.
My now ex-gf drug me along to a halloweekend rave and I got elected to be designated by her friends. All of my friends went to a party in a different city.
So at the end of the night (early, a fire alarm got pulled) It came time to round everyone up and ... | 9 | 5.777778 | |
1351404875 | 1351541325 | null | t5_2to41 | 475 | edge_of_glory: TIFU by putting Germ X in my already fucked up ears.
I have been suffering from hard wax buildup for the last 2 weeks. I finally get to the doctor Friday and she says use warm water and peroxide a few times a day to get rid of it. So I do it, but I keep getting water trapped in my ear that wont come out.... | 8 | 59.375 | |
1351457678 | 1351691591 | t3_127047 | t5_2to41 | 15 | FarFromXanadu: Keep thinking that.
cunninglinguist96: *downvote
upvote
downvote
upvote
downvote
upvote*
FarFromXanadu: True, in a way you probably didn't intend. It's literally been a roller coaster of people either upvoting him and downvoting me, or the reverse.
Also I like your name. I kind of want your name.
Atlas... | 4 | 3.75 |
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