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3
[deleted]: TIFU by nearly cutting of my thumb First: This wasn't today, it was 4 days ago but nearly every TIFU Post here is longer ago. TL;DR at the end. Sooo, let's get started. I was camping with some friends of mine in a small village called Tholey at the French-German Border. It was the evening and it got dar...
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[deleted]: TIFU by trying to make someone feel welcome Hi Reddit, how are you? I apologize in advance for the long post. My co-worker and I f'd up with a volunteer a little over a year ago. My co-worker, we'll call him Hot Guy (nickname he got from a guest), and I work at a local zoo. We were assigned to work at a ...
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Adulf_Hitlyr: TIFU by recognizing a class mate. This is the perfect storm, honestly. The catastrophic day begins by me getting up and getting ready to go to school. Once I'm done all that, my mom and I make a plan to drop her off at her work, meanwhile I take the car to my school. Well we arrive at the intersection whe...
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0.75
1411249987
1411280938
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6
Pm_me_dem_potatoes: Tifu by my using the Kinect. This just happened like 5 min ago. I was playing forza horizon 2 on my dads profile when my brother wanted to play minecraft. After one more race I told him ok, so at the same time we both said x-box go to minecraft. It understood it as one drive instead and lemme tell y...
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11
[deleted]: TIFU by not knowing how to wear a skirt okay, typically for this thread, it actually happened two years back. i was volunteering at y-peer, which is, in basic terms, a youth-peer network advocating for youth development and "increased access to information, knowledge, and services on sexual and reproductive ...
3
3.666667
1411253630
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t3_2gzluo
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9
cutelikeaids: TIFU by getting horseradish in my vagina. This happened earlier today. I was making a large quantity of horseradish sauce from some I just dug up in of the garden. I had finished and at that point was long over due for a bathroom trip. I of course didn't think of washing my hands BEFORE I wipe...... thus ...
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2.25
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3
twinprime: TIFU by totaling my sister's car at 150000 miles Smilee1: I'm sure your attention of taking pictures of your odometer while going 60 miles an hour had nothing to do with your wreck or otherwise reflect on your driving skills. twinprime: I knew somebody was going to mention that. I took those pictures when I...
3
1
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16
theslobfather: TIFU by throwing my phone at my mates head Last night, myself and a couple of friends headed down to the pub to play some pool and have a few beers. After staying there until closing, we decide to head back to my mates flat to play some drinking games, picking up a crate of beer en route in the taxi. It...
3
5.333333
1411253900
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45
[deleted]: TIFU by taking Viagra for the first time I thought it would give me a rock hard boner for an hour or two then the boner would go away. I was right. Cozy, happy, good times. But then it came back. And then it went away. Then it was back. Then it was morning. Then it was time to take the kids to preschoo...
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9
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4
joshtheboss92: TIFU by taking a big dirty poop So.. I was on my merry way home a few days ago, when I noticed my stomach grumbling with the power of a thousand cheeseburgers. I get to the house and make haste to the toilet tower and unleash hell upon that poor ceramic bowl like it's no body's business! I wipe, I flush,...
3
1.333333
1411259553
1411290527
t3_2gzu5p
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21
whydoyoutry: TIFU by violently ripping out my urinary catheter To make a long story short, I have urinary retention and had to have a urinary catheter. After the initial insertion, I was completely fine. The anesthesia honestly made me feel a bit euphoric. This made the nurse comfortable with leaving me alone for a bit...
5
4.2
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3
[deleted]: TIFU by helping my roommate This happened between 2-4 AM today. My roommate calls and wakes me up at 2AM saying someone stole his keys. Ok whatever I got no problem burning some gas to drive a half hour to give him his spare Motorcycle key. Then I'm following him home because I notice he took a different r...
3
1
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76
yanbu: TIFU By Washing A Tarp Covered In Moose Blood In My Backyard So I went hunting and got a moose. After getting back from the butcher's shop I had a tarp with a bunch of blood on it, so I washed it off with a hose in the back yard. [This](http://imgur.com/xWN0GWg) was the result!!! I have been overrun by bears....
7
10.857143
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10
KrazyKripples: TIFU by trying to hug a crazy girl Today I visited my dad at his mental institution (he had a breakdown long story) and the crazy girl across the hall from him joined us. She and I have talked a few times and she seems nice. Crazy, but nice. So today she told me that she will sit and talk with my dad (he...
7
1.428571
1411263601
1411266114
t3_2gzzoy
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5
Veganheathen420: TIFU house sitting for my boss and may be fired by another boss for other reasons. Please excuse formatting and typos, I'm on my phone. This post is long and businessy.. but at least no sex or bodily fluids involved. So this actually happened Today WooHoo! but I should give some backstory first. I'm ...
3
1.666667
1411263700
1411265816
t3_2gzzt7
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5
[deleted]: Tifu by taking a time-lapse of my dick This actually happened today, a few minutes ago actually. I had just gotten the new iphone update and was messing around with some new stuff it had when i noticed the time lapse feature. Clearly the next step would be to take a time lapse of my dick...with my door un...
3
1.666667
1411263262
1411269497
t3_2gzz8d
t5_2to41
3
[deleted]: TIFU by going to a party Im visiting the city where I originally grew up. Its friday night, Im at home, bored with nothing to do. An old friend of mine invites me to tag along with him to a house party. (actually an apartment). We get there and its a Biker party, tattoos, blow ,strippers and booze everywher...
3
1
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18
james007dude: TIFU - Bus Relationship So every day i get the no. 56 bus from my house to work, i have done this route so many times for the past decade their is a common group of familiar people who all see each other every day. So for the past few weeks a new girl passenger join the group who lets just say was a good ...
3
6
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41
jorgejimz: TIFU by losing a fake coral snake at my place. This just happened yesterday; I'm a biologist undergrad and I usually work with venomous or poisonous animals (check my posts if you want to) like scorpions, snakes and insects; anywaaaay: Day before yesterday I took a group of freshmen boys and girls to the fi...
5
8.2
1411265496
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t3_2h026r
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9
bbqmidgets: TIFU by ditching my crush at 3am First post on reddit so.. A little bit of backstory, I've been suffering from severe migraines so I've been sleeping awfully early for the past few days (10-11ish). So my crush and I have this thing where on the last night of the holidays, we would talk throughout the night ...
4
2.25
1411264569
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t3_2h00ya
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3
Punk45Fuck: TIFU Pea Soup Tried making pea soup. Didn't have the ingredients. Said, "screw it" and threw a lot of random crap in. Cooked the bejeezus out of it. Now I have flavorless pea mush. It is the blandest thing I have ever eaten. It has literally no flavor. I put ketchup on it and it just tastes of ketchup. I ca...
3
1
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14
HeliumTankAW: Tifu by asking my husband to hug me and say thank you once in a while. Now my relationship might be at an end. It turned into a huge fight that has lasted all day. Highlights are he shouldnt have to be grateful because Im home all day and he works. I take care of our 8 month old all day. We also have a 6 ...
4
3.5
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4
Lyra7419: TIFU by not reading what my crush wrote So... when I was 15 (yeah, another "not Today I Fucked Up" story, I'm sorry.) I had this huge crush that I had met in a 3-week-vacation camp. Anyway, I ended up tellong my feelings on the last day, she rejected me and I just kinda get depressed. I had unfriended her fro...
5
0.8
1411264167
1411286405
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7
Chaos_Quint: TIFU by blowing my nose Happened a couple of months ago and it is pretty tame in comparison to a lot of other stories. I was catching the train home from work, middle of winter, cold. I get off the train and peak hour is done and only a few other people get off. From the station I cross some lights and wal...
3
2.333333
1411269492
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111
SillyGirrl: TIFU By trying some reddit-suggested moves in the bedroom. NSFW So, I'm sure you all read the front page askreddit thread from yesterday: 'What makes a guy awesome in the bedroom?', or something of that nature. My SO and I were up late, and we had a good time reading through the thread together. About half-...
5
22.2
1411271433
1411355322
t3_2h0a8m
t5_2to41
8
Swiftii: TIFU by kissing a close friend We were at a movie so I went for it. She won't talk to me and told all her friends and I keep getting texts fromthem about it MartyMartinez33: Did she stop talking to you right after you kissed her? Did she show signs that you wanted to kiss her? How did she react after you did? ...
5
1.6
1411276306
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803
ford_f150: TIFU by jerking off with the pool vacuum [NSFW] OK, so here it goes. Yes, i have jerked off in a lot of places. I was a horny fucking teenager, yo. At my parents old house we had an in-ground swimming pool with one of those vacuums that rolled around the pool constantly. Being 15 year old me, I had already...
5
160.6
1411275510
1411279682
t3_2h0fb7
t5_2to41
8
[deleted]: TIFU By lifting up my table top So this happened like 2 minutes ago. I own chickens & am baby sitting some chickens. The chickens I baby sit only lay like 1 a day because they're so young not all are laying. And since I had other animals to care for, when I grabbed their egg I just set it on the coffee...
7
1.142857
1411277474
1411352974
t3_2h0hg5
t5_2to41
27
tangerineman: TIFU by exposing myself on chatroulette I've recently discovered the camera on my laptop so I've gone on chatroulette a few times. And I haven't been masturbating while on it (I live in close quarters, and I'm not risking getting caught like that) but I'd like to be. Anyways, I came across some chick, she...
8
3.375
1411278156
1411386747
t3_2h0i77
t5_2to41
11
oddw0lf: TIFU by trying to buy weed from someone who set me up So it was near the end of my 7 hour shift tonight when some kid from high school messaged me asking me if I needed weed. Idiotically, I said I did want some, and I agreed to meet him behind Walmart after work. I get there, go to the back seat of the car ...
6
1.833333
1411279323
1411281564
t3_2h0jdh
t5_2to41
8
Drtypiratehooker: TIFU by peeing out of my butt. So this was yesterday and onto today. I had a headache, and decided to take some old excedrin. Little to my knowledge, the excedrin gods poison the pills with an amplified amount of caffiene over time. So my headache went away, but i ended up on the toilet with both of m...
6
1.333333
1411278708
1411364231
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44
shift_happenstance: TIFU by hugging my little cousin I was babysitting my three cousins and the middle one (8), my godson, was making me his "delicious toast with butter." He had oven mitts on and was so happy about his culinary skills. I come up from behind him to hug him and tell him thank you without realizing he ...
5
8.8
1411280249
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16
inb4_apples: TIFU by using the disabled toilet So this happened about 20 minutes ago and I still feel kinda sick. Some back story to begin with, I work in a small shopping center in an electronics store and we don't have any of our own toilets so we have to use the centers ones. And i know some smartass is going to b...
3
5.333333
1411277874
1411280974
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3
[deleted]: TIFU by asking when she was adopted So I put my foot in my mouth majorly today. Needless to say I feel so stupid. A girl I know from college was in town helping her cousin move in, we hungout for a few hours. In a lull in the conversation I brought up a topic I was wondering about: "I was wondering, when we...
3
1
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15
[deleted]: TIFU By letting my 1 year old niece play with my iPad. A couple hours ago, my sister, mother and niece were in the back seat getting ready to go home from my grandfathers 90th birthday. My niece, who didn't have her usual nap was being restless and cranky, so I decided to calm her down the best way I could. ...
7
2.142857
1411282831
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t3_2h0mpe
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21
[deleted]: TIFU by potentially throwing my career away and it was entirely preventable. Hello fellow redditors, Technically, this is not a TIFU, it's more like a last month thing. To make a long story short, I am a recent college graduate with a MA in Criminal Intelligence. I've been applying to police agencies across...
4
5.25
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paulwal: TIFU and forgot to add water to my mac & cheese http://i.imgur.com/tdNOwKy.jpg The smell is horrible. I think it lowered the property value by 8%. Raiden_Gekkou: Are you a drunk college freshman? paulwal: I wish.
3
28.666667
1411281518
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15
bugsmourn: TIFU by doing MDMA at a party My friends and I decided to hit up a party when our plans didn't work out, we already had booze and knew some people there so we headed over. Right before we went in my friend gave me a little white capsule and told me to take it, I took it and didn't think It could be that insa...
4
3.75
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10
[deleted]: TIFU by being in Afghanistan. This happened minutes ago. It's really not all that bad, but let me give some background first. I'm on my first deployment and for me it has been punctuated by fuck ups, to the point where my name is almost synonymous with some kind of shit going horribly wrong. First couple ...
4
2.5
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2,734
Xleader23: TIFU by trusting my girlfriend This was about 5 years ago but I am finally drunk enough to tell it. I had been dating this girl on and off for over a year. We had spent the day together in January and had been having a wonderful time together. Well, we decided to have some fun and while we were having sex, ...
28
97.642857
1411287356
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161
g11g00g3r: TIFU by shining a laser in my pet fish's eye. I had a little black goldfish, you know, the one with big eyes popping out of its head. I also bought a tiny laser pointer that day. I thought it would be funny to point the laser in its eye. A few days later, it started acting weirdly. It died of an eye infectio...
6
26.833333
1411284325
1411294951
t3_2h0o0n
t5_2to41
8
MomSawMyHelicopter: TIFU by shaking my dick at my dog in front of my mom Ok so shit you need to know before I start: I'm 15, my sister is 14, we have a running joke about our dog. The joke is that our dog finds me nasty and that whenever I go near her she walks away. So it's 2AM, my sister and I are getting a drink i...
3
2.666667
1411278959
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12
dcastillo11: TIFU by asking a girl to "bang" Long time reader, first time poster, so bear with with. This happened about a week ago and I'm not using a throwaway cause fuck-it. So this past week I went to visit a buddy of mine out of state. I arrived on Thursday for his birthday and we partied the weekend away being th...
4
3
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962
NOT_ah_BOT: TIFU by Having sex Drunk A little back story; i am not good with women, never have been. its been longer than i'd like to admit since i've been laid. So this happened last night. A few friends had convinced me to go to a bar with them, and i agreed. While at the bar, as my borderline alcoholic self, had ha...
7
137.428571
1411291945
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t3_2h0u3j
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431
koproller: TIFU by being a huge racist on accident. Happened a while ago. I was a teen, and this friend of me was, unlike me, already sexual active. So one day, we where sitting on a terrace and he said *"I like my girls drunk"* (important: in dutch he said "ik hou van **dronken** meisjes") I was a bit shocked. So ...
12
35.916667
1411295414
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27
BRIGHTLIKENEONLOVE: TIFU by not cleaning out our pantry before a long vacation. My roommate and I just got back yesterday from a month-long vacation in Europe. I am Asian, and one of the first things I wanted to do when we got home was to cook the rice I had left over from before our trip. As I poured some water into t...
5
5.4
1411293208
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7
MrFistoflames1: TIFU By drinking too much and being a dick to my new uni flat mates... It was Saturday and the end of Freshers week in my university so I thought I would go and buy some cheap booze and drink myself happy. (missing home/ people sucks yo!) Invited some friends I had made on the campus over to help me dri...
5
1.4
1411299409
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96
[deleted]: TIFU by having my first kiss at 20 Swarlsonegger: Shoulda just admit "I am not really I could kisser maybe you can teach me or we can skip through this part all together" or something along those lines. But that way she has expectations you do not fulfill => disappointment. A6289W922: No. You should neve...
6
16
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7,682
[deleted]: TIFU by going outside. I've been bedridden for the past 3 days with flu like symtoms and started feeling well enough to leave my bed today, so I went outside into the yard to catch up on some sun, and literally 30 seconds later a bird shat on my head. So into the shower and back to bed I went. Edit: Thanks ...
11
698.363636
1411297583
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t3_2h0yjb
t5_2to41
3
[deleted]: TIFU by creaming myself in the face Well this happened about 10 minutes ago and well my gf was giving me a blowjob which was fucking awesome, and I'm having the time of the life and i say "I'm about to cum" to warn her but she doesn't hear me as she's too into it and just as I'm about to spray my man soap in...
3
1
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The_Gaming_Unicorn: tifu by clicking remember my password on a school computer. Hey guys I'm the janitor and this retard clicked remember me :D Ok guys I'm going to stop using this account :D trewqpoiuy: Lol... we aren't *that* stupid. Only teenagers spell like that and use ":D". The_Gaming_Unicorn: I'm 22... Close ...
12
9.916667
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10
[deleted]: TIFU by kissing my best friend and not telling her ex who's another close friend. This wasn't today, this was over the course of the past few months. So, some background: This girl, let's call her Annie, and I were best friends. We talked about everything and we were like siblings. Everything was going gre...
4
2.5
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eslaf: TIFU by getting really drunk last night So I am a typical college student. Last night there was a house party. To pregame I had 200ml of maker's whisky. Then I went to the party about an hour later not feeling a thing so I decided to do a headstand (I'm a yoga teacher) and drink a lot of beer. Well I can't remem...
6
27
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magoop_: TIFU by getting way too high Today I fucked up and ruined a good experience for my friends and I. We were out having a good time, hanging out and getting food. Being high and all, were having an insane time. Talking about crazy high ideas, and just spouting everything on our minds. We end up at one bench where...
3
3.666667
1411308716
1411334700
t3_2h19el
t5_2to41
43
[deleted]: TIFU by getting too drunk and being too lonely This happened a couple of weeks ago. I made plans to go over to my buddy's new apartment and as soon as I get there he says "Hey, drink this!" And of course I say yes because of my crippling alcoholism. It was delicious. It was a bottle of hippie juice and I had...
8
5.375
1411311983
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t3_2h1ds1
t5_2to41
2
[deleted]: TIFU by having a boner in class So I fucked up big time today. We watched a sex movie in class and I had a boner today in class (so did everybody, we are a boy class). One of the kids took down my pants and made fun of my small cock and I was so angry that I took down his pants and punched his dick. It wa...
4
0.5
1411309723
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136
[deleted]: TIFU by running down the street with a sword. So - in light of the result of the referendum for Scottish independence - I felt the necessity to get absolutely shitfaced on cheap Tesco whiskey and Irn Bru. The night was going well. I saw old friends, made new friends and a few enemies for life. This was until...
6
22.666667
1411312053
1411350755
t3_2h1dw9
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49
[deleted]: TIFU by getting my wife pregnant We found out at the beginning of this year that my wife is pregnant with our fourth child. We were shocked and worried. My son has special needs and requires a good deal of attention, and I was working about 30 hours a week at a grocery store, obviously not making much money....
9
5.444444
1411314063
1411390917
t3_2h1gwq
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15
TIFUThrowaway5876: TIFU By (Not) Fucking my Best Friend's Ex. So...I have been cuddle buddies with my best friend's ex for about 3 weeks. These two still have feeling for one another but the situation is complicated. Mind you while I did this, I made sure my friend knew what we were doing. Everything was cool up until ...
10
1.5
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t3_2h1bag
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6
[deleted]: TIFU by giving my S.O. cunnilingus and realising afterwards that there was blood all over her vagina. So first post here and thought it was definitely a big fuck up... Not a lot of backstory but it was a long stressful day moving house. Finally got all the belongings to the new place and of course decided t...
3
2
1411296951
1411355606
t3_2h0y0a
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23
[deleted]: Tifu by puking on the train on a girl I like. So last night I was having pre drinks with this girl I like before heading out nightclubbing. It was going well and I was really excited to go out. I was dressed up, make up perfect, bits shaved ready for a night of partying and hopefully getting laid. Made plan...
5
4.6
1411314903
1411324957
t3_2h1i6d
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4
[deleted]: Tifu by speeding to girlfriends church. Just for context I'm a 19 year old male with a passion for speeding. Today I woke up ready to meet my girlfriend's folks at church. The thing is I was about 10 minutes late from my normal departure time. I run to the driveway and see two cars a 99 Escort and a 05 Linc...
3
1.333333
1411316368
1411332102
t3_2h1k37
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356
I_Am_A_Total_Idiot: TIFU by apparently being a pedophile **Preface**: So I am not a runner. I am however, friends with lots of runners. Like all my friends are runners, ultra marathoners, and triathletes. I am the kind of chubby guy that is slow (5'8 200lbs so not fat but I could stand to lose a few pounds) in our grou...
8
44.5
1411312939
1411435774
t3_2h1f6z
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46
Tkachenko: TIFU by eating my first pot brownie on a school field trip to the Phillies game So, TIFU with my friend (who we will call C) fucking with edibles for the first time. C and I were officers in our school's environmental action club. We were invited to walk up and down the stands collecting bottles and cans in ...
6
7.666667
1411318023
1411318937
t3_2h1mxl
t5_2to41
6
Thorroden: TIFU by trying to get lunch at my gf's work. So for context, my girlfriend and I rent a room from her sister in her home recently her sister has put her house on the market and there are regular viewings over the weekends. As well, my girlfriend and I have a small amount of time to save money, find a place,...
3
2
1411280685
1411344909
t3_2h0kpa
t5_2to41
25
Darkheart91: TIFU by ordering Tea... So, I do some work for a few charity organisations. The downside is that some of these happen to be in the morning. I'm a night owl usually so it takes me a bit to wake up. I decided today I was going to stop by a popular fast food chain's drive through for breakfast on my way. I g...
8
3.125
1411318508
1411322609
t3_2h1nsi
t5_2to41
5
orose24: TIFU by being a coward and not making an appointment . Currently sobbing. So a few months ago I started to have sharp but not constant or long lasting tooth pain. I'm a whiny bitch when it comes to the dentist so I ignore it and up my dental hygiene. It stayed but wasn't.bad enough for.me care. I kept remember...
5
1
1411318712
1411396717
t3_2h1o3q
t5_2to41
10
Snaptic77: TIFU by leaving the door unlocked For the past week I have been house sitting for my sister and her boyfriend while they are on vacation in Mexico. They live in a one bedroom apartment in an apartment building on the ground floor. Because they're on the ground floor, they have a door that opens to the outsid...
8
1.25
1411318796
1411364067
t3_2h1o8r
t5_2to41
98
Lord_Alesus: Tifu by "just going to sauna" Meet me, avarage 17 Finnish boy. Me and my four friends are going to sauna together and "just have a good time". There were no parents home so my friend whips out a 80% vodka bottle and a full case of beer and says lets have a good time. We start drinking and swimming in the ...
6
16.333333
1411316186
1411322683
t3_2h1jt1
t5_2to41
14
[deleted]: TIFU by losing what little i had. Yesterday i was paid my salary, while my girlfriend slept in the bed next to me, i managed to find a new casino site that i hadnt previously self excluded myself from. Over the course of an hour i managed to lose every penny in my bank account. I have no credit availabilit...
3
4.666667
1411319734
1411323232
t3_2h1psl
t5_2to41
4
[deleted]: TIFU by marrying a pleb On Friday I was having a pretty sour day at work so I decided to text my husband for a bit of cheering up and this is what transpired: My husband is a delivery driver and was on a short delivery during the evening school rush hour, he parks the car up on the side of the road and, see...
4
1
1411317527
1411340809
t3_2h1m48
t5_2to41
105
FearItself0: TIFU by letting a bee chill in my room So yesterday afternoon a bee flew into my room through a crack in the window. I closed the crack so nothing else would get in and I went to go kill the bee. I couldn't find it, however, and I quickly forgot the bee was in here. Cue to 5:30 this morning and I'm woke...
5
21
1411321249
1411323358
t3_2h1s98
t5_2to41
19
Virgoan: TIFU by grabbing a fire ant infested food bowl. I went out this morning barefoot to say good morning too my outdoor cat. He was crying for food which I thought was strange because there was food in his dish last night. I walked back and reached down to the bowl noticing the food was moving. I focused on now th...
3
6.333333
1411325109
1411400824
t3_2h1yxe
t5_2to41
855
galumph_triumph: TIFU and almost got killed by a group of men for changing out of my work clothes This wasn't today, but I was recently told that I should put this on TIFU. In my junior college years I was a server at a very expensive Italian restaurant. We had nice outfits. After work on Friday nights, I'd typically...
9
95
1411324924
1411412339
t3_2h1yl8
t5_2to41
13
Small3y: Tifu by destroying £1000s of electrical at work! Working warehouse at a big uk retailer, moving milk delivery on a motorised pallet truck (Mastermover). I took the corner too fast next to the DAB radio/Headphone/Bluetooth speaker display. About 40 litres of milk all over the displays and floor! DeathAndReb...
5
2.6
1411318673
1411338796
t3_2h1o1f
t5_2to41
8
frenchmeister: TIFU by getting slapped in the face by pizza I was eating leftover deep dish pizza for breakfast on the couch, but at one point I went to cut a piece off with my fork and slipped, and my entire plate flipped toward me somehow. My pizza went flying, slapping me in the nose before landing face down on my c...
3
2.666667
1411324623
1411334608
t3_2h1y2g
t5_2to41
2
ZombieLinux: TIFU by breaking the phone I was going to sell tomorrow. So I've had the same cell phone for 2 and a half years (HTC One X, for whatever that matters). I got a new phone yesterday. So I wiped and cleaned and updated my old One X for sale. Someone was going to buy it for ~130$ the whole deal was set. I d...
3
0.666667
1411326304
1411356512
t3_2h211c
t5_2to41
13
[deleted]: TIFU by not sitting across from my GF This fuck-up actually happened yesterday: My GF's parents decided they wanted to meet me before I took their daughter on an actual date, and so I agreed to meet them at a restaurant. Now, I am a teenage male, and do not have a license, so I was picked up by her brother a...
4
3.25
1411330803
1411348836
t3_2h28zl
t5_2to41
7
twtCharlie: TIFU by *modding* my Macbook Pro Retina. Modded with tire of truck on hard pavement while working on truck. Laptop still works, stress-tested it with a few games of HOTS. New curve in the frame is ergonomic, may serve as an airflow assistant. Pics: http://imgur.com/a/n7xTk Can anyone tell me how much the ...
7
1
1411331043
1411343524
t3_2h29er
t5_2to41
5
Iamanidiot69: TIFU by snapchatting in the shower This a throwaway account because you know. This happened probably 10 minutes ago I had been snapchatting my girlfriend all day and she was in her bra and underwear and she was sending me sexy snaps of her. So I decided to take a shower. I have a lifeproof case for my ...
3
1.666667
1411338597
1411349042
t3_2h26s9
t5_2to41
-5
BeardsuptheWazoo: But you did threaten her. You know why you picked up that knife. I don't think you deserve 15 years, and it wont come that, but you did threaten her. savereality: SO IS IT A THREAT WHEN POLICE PUT THEIR HAND ON THEIR GUN AT EVERY TRAFFIC STOP OR PULL IT WHENEVER THEY GET A CALL FOR A PERSON WHO MIGHT...
4
-1.25
1411330480
1411401822
t3_2h28ez
t5_2to41
239
PunMan42: TIFU by ignoring my nosebleed I'ts a pretty normal quiz. Normal as in the entirity of my studying was done about five minutes before class - nothing unusual. I liked this class because I get to sit behind this really cute girl who I was considering asking out. It was about half way through my assessment whe...
6
39.833333
1411331827
1411335490
t3_2h2asq
t5_2to41
11
Koolzo: TIFU by Passing a Note in Class Like the majority of these stories, this didn't happen today, but rather last Friday. Also, no throwaway because 1.) it's not really a big deal, and 2.) I don't really care if people I know see this. A small bit of backstory (followed by some more backstory): Last Monday, I was ...
3
3.666667
1411335384
1411373161
t3_2h2gxb
t5_2to41
392
FuzzyBagpuss: TIFU by playing pc games I play a lot of PC games, I also hate pausing a game when I'm in the heat of the action to do something. This afternoon, whilst playing FIFA my tummy starts to grumble. I'll finish the game and go for a poo. Proceed to finish, save the game and get to the top of the stairs when ...
9
43.555556
1411335914
1411338051
t3_2h2hqb
t5_2to41
87
criticalhitshop: TIFU by making fun of a rap video.... I work at a movie theater. The pay is low but it's a fun job and everyone there is on good terms. We joke around a lot. This particular night I'm working a closing shift and near the end of the night, we need to get the standard list of closing chores and I go to t...
3
29
1411335869
1411354762
t3_2h2hnt
t5_2to41
7
[deleted]: TIFU by creeping a girl out by stalking her Facebook So, being the loner, asocial kind of guy, I kind of live vicariously through other people's social network profiles, mostly to see what they are like when they go out and have fun, or what their likes in music, film, politics, etc, are. (Yes, when it come...
4
1.75
1411336174
1411421365
t3_2h2i6h
t5_2to41
11
AakashMasani: TIFU by intending to post a FB conversation to /r/cringe and they found out I had uploaded the conversation to imgur and blacked out the names and intended to post it to /r/cringe. I then backed out of it and thought it wasn't a great idea. (This was weeks ago) Then today I get a fb message and it's him a...
4
2.75
1411336738
1411343907
t3_2h2j3z
t5_2to41
67
[deleted]: TIFU by not being able to achieve an erection. I got really drunk at a party last night, and I was talking with a friend of a friend, lets call her Sheela. Things were really going well so I decided that in my drunken state that it would be a good idea to try my luck and ask her if she wanted to go somewhere...
3
22.333333
1411335853
1411410633
t3_2h2hms
t5_2to41
3
PoFolk: TIFU by hitting a dog with my car. I was at a friends picking up an ASVAB book and as I'm pulling out of his cold-sack I notice a man walking up to the street off the blind hillside. At that same moment something caught my attention from my peripheral; It was a 150ish pound pit bull sprinting across his front ...
3
1
1411337115
1411344876
t3_2h2jrb
t5_2to41
3
smb0921: TIFU By Getting My Poop On My Friend's Shoe TIFU well not today but in 5th grade I did this thing called Robotics where you made these robots with Lego's and this thing you controlled it with. We would do this every Friday after school. I always had a more explosive and not easily controllable bowel a...
3
1
1411335163
1411347061
t3_2h2giv
t5_2to41
68
naivelt: TIFU by being tall as a child. Like most fuck-ups, this happened a long time ago, in the third grade. Background: I was the tallest boy in grade three, and that made some of the shorter kids a little jealous, especially this one guy, we'll call him Jeffery. Jeffery was above and beyond the shortest kid in the...
4
17
1411334618
1411338555
t3_2h2fl2
t5_2to41
6
Throwawayyou22: TIFU by thinking a bee was my dog...... Okay so let me start this with telling you I have a little dog who loves to bug me when I am eating and normally I give me dog the last bite of my food by throwing it to her. So, today I was taking a very much needed lunch break from working on my house with my d...
3
2
1411338467
1411366383
t3_2h2m2f
t5_2to41
49
forwhombagels: TIFU by wiping my ass So I was in a rush and trying to get ready for work so I decided to multitask. While I was taking a shit I decided to also gargle some mouthwash (the kind with alcohol in it). So I spit it out and dribbled it all over my face. I then grabbed some TP and whipped it off my face and pr...
4
12.25
1411338122
1411365259
t3_2h2lia
t5_2to41
194
alamistx: TIFU By Returning A Man's Lost Condom So, I'm 17 (but I look 20ish) and work at a small family amusement park. It was around 1:00 and I went to go give the guy operating the roller coaster his 30 minute lunch break. Now, on this roller coaster, it's pretty common for people to leave things such as their cell ...
7
27.714286
1411339262
1411423448
t3_2h2nff
t5_2to41
19
donthanganddrive: TIFU by throwing up while driving This actually happened a couple of years ago but I was thinking about it today and decided it was finally worthy of sharing... My downward spiral started when was running late for a night out so I decided to skip dinner and save a little time. Skipping dinner plus an...
4
4.75
1411339807
1411393479
t3_2h2oa9
t5_2to41
560
Pebblethrower: TIFU by letting my little brother use my laptop This literally happened two minutes ago. So I'm up in my room doing homework when my 13 year old brother comes in and asks to use my computer (which I'm currently not using) to check his homework. I let him, and normally I would have made sure that's wh...
8
70
1411337129
1411343028
t3_2h2js0
t5_2to41
6
imcomingholdon: TIFU by dropping my pipe. This happened a few weeks ago when I met up with my friend to have a nice little smoke session. As I left my house to meet him I made sure I had my bare essentials (phone, wallet, keys, weed, pipe, lighter) and I realized I left my pipe in the backyard. No big deal. I walk b...
3
2
1411340811
1411389232
t3_2h2pyf
t5_2to41
37
sergeybok: TIFU by not getting laid in my dream [deleted]: Having a fucking dream is not a TIFU. DakotaThrice: It wasn't a "fucking dream" though, thats the fuck up. [deleted]: What?
4
9.25
1411319197
1411345736
t3_2h1ox9
t5_2to41
40
[deleted]: TIFU by not cleaning up after myself this past Friday morning... This happened today but the main part of the story started on Friday. So every morning I have a routine of getting dressed and eating breakfast and I usually boil the water for coffee the old fashion way with a coffee pot and leave it boiling w...
3
13.333333
1411340556
1411344815
t3_2h2piu
t5_2to41
5
[deleted]: TIFU by showing up drunk to my workplace and pissing my manager off Okay, this was technically yesterday. So I, as a college student, work at a fast food place. One of my coworkers (let's call her Bailey) and I were in line for promotion; we both wanted the position very badly. Bailey and I are friends, han...
3
1.666667