start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1412280612 | 1412308216 | t3_2i4f91 | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling my fiance the truth. [NSFW]
It was actually last night. I came to bed after him and after I got into the bed, I did not move. I laid on my stomach with one hand holding the pillow and the other holding the blanket.
I was like that for about 15 minutes trying to fall asleep when my fiance si... | 7 | 2.857143 | |
1412279820 | 1412284983 | t3_2i4dt7 | t5_2to41 | 5 | shallowbookworm: TIFU by accidentally making myself look like my dealer's roommate's pathetic groupie
So I'm a freshman in college and move-in was at the end of August. Only knowing a couple from high school, I was pretty desperate to make friends, so I went to a house party during welcome week.
At this party, I met B... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1412280020 | 1412289465 | t3_2i4e66 | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by drinking my urine
This happened a couple months ago
------------------------
This is extremely embarrassing so throwaway time! It was late at night, and I was in my bed trying to fall asleep, but there was one thing that really restricted me from dozing off...I had to piss really bad. The girlfriend ... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1412281110 | 1412301319 | t3_2i4g8t | t5_2to41 | 5 | Macular_Patdown: TIFU by getting a flat tire
**EDIT** : UPDATE AT BOTTOM
This morning I was feeling sort of rushed to get to work. I get into my car and am already feeling irked because I had missed breakfast. I begin out of the neighborhood and start to notice the handling seemed weird and the car was making a thu... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1412280969 | 1412368460 | t3_2i4fym | t5_2to41 | 22 | Blazing86: TIFU by farting the hottest girl in my gym.
Well I finally decide to get a personal trainer at my gym to help me work out. People who currently train with him have told me he keeps up with you and make sure that you’re doing your exercises even on his days off. So I signed up, set up the appointment, and was... | 5 | 4.4 | |
1412282270 | 1412321845 | t3_2i4ij6 | t5_2to41 | 945 | ZapatosAzules: TIFU by giving my roommate her panties back.
I started a new lease with two girls at the beginning of August. I became good friends with them last year and they're super chill so I knew there wouldn't be too many problems, if any. Well, between one of them (let's call her Dallas) and myself there's somet... | 9 | 105 | |
1412285787 | 1412288128 | t3_2i4p61 | t5_2to41 | 12 | plspolice: TIFU by speeding and having excess passengers
Hi Reddit,
My tifu isn't really a funny one I'm just looking for some solid advice. Today I drove 15 mph over in a 35 mile zone and I had 4 other passengers in my car while being 16 years old. (Turn 17 before court date idk if it would help though.) I was giving... | 5 | 2.4 | |
1412281899 | 1412291704 | t3_2i4hrr | t5_2to41 | 50 | ark2010: TIFU By "Cocking" an unexpected man
This happened about 45 minutes ago. Still laughing about it to myself now.
My friends and I from as long as I can remember have sent "cock" messages to each other by text. This started off as the occasional text around 11 year ago and then became the sporadic bombardment. I... | 4 | 12.5 | |
1412288482 | 1412346512 | t3_2i4u2t | t5_2to41 | 5,705 | NickH850: TIFU by pressure washing a penis on a clients driveway
So today I fucked up.. As the title says it was with a pressure washer. And here's what went down:
I work for a handyman service doing odd end jobs at pretty nice houses(this house was worth 1.4 mil) so the company I work for had a request to pressure was... | 13 | 438.846154 | |
1412287917 | 1412323743 | t3_2i4t1i | t5_2to41 | 38 | CUNextThurs: TIFU by gluing my penis to my shorts
My zipper broke in the middle of the day, which left it wide open. These shorts were on their last journey so I tried to super glue the zipper shut. Little did I know glue soaked through my underwear and dried. My dick was glued to my boxers and my boxers were glued to ... | 5 | 7.6 | |
1412289493 | 1412291646 | t3_2i4vun | t5_2to41 | 8 | Wrong_Lube: TIFU by using a lubricant I'm apparently allergic to.
So, long story short..
My fwb tried to be sexy and use some lubes/scented lotions last week. I figured it'd be cool and nice to try something different and mix it up a little bit.. He puts on this nice scented lube, it's like a sweet plant or just rel... | 6 | 1.333333 | |
1412284735 | 1412305321 | t3_2i4n7h | t5_2to41 | 13 | T-Rex_Soup: TIFU by accidentally being racist
This happened a few days ago (sorry) so here's what happened: I was in my second hour class and seminar was coming up, well at seminar, we can go to different rooms throughout the school to study, talk to friends, visit the library, etc. My friend was going to come to our c... | 7 | 1.857143 | |
1412288927 | 1412296586 | t3_2i4uue | t5_2to41 | 6 | GayHoliday: TIFU By Sleeping in the Car
Context: At orthodontist after school with mother(who is getting her lower half braces), very tired, sleep is needed.
So my mom hands me the keys to the car and says "if you wanna sleep, you can turn on the AC" and so I went.
In the car, it was freaking HOT. Being 100+ degrees ... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1412290619 | 1412344107 | t3_2i4xur | t5_2to41 | 193 | ChiefTief: TIFU by chemically burning my penis.
Like many TIFUs this happened a few years ago, and I've only just gotten over my own stupidity enough to post this.
One fateful night around the age of fifteen I was in my bathroom after a shower, considering jerking the gherkin as every fifteen year old does on a daily ... | 6 | 32.166667 | |
1412291834 | 1412303603 | t3_2i4zwz | t5_2to41 | 24 | Tinytiny3: TIFU by posting a link to pictures of my privates on a work chat
I'm currently working from a hotel, so I took some pictures of my little friend, created an album and submitted it to reddit. Like everyone does when they are out on business travel, right?
Later on, while discussing about some equipment that ... | 4 | 6 | |
1412292153 | 1412293130 | t3_2i50fa | t5_2to41 | 7 | wolfrimbaud: TIFU by looking at porn at work, downloading a virus, and getting fired.
About ten years ago, knowing nothing about computers, I took a job at an antique gallery. It was my first office job, doing usual office type things, at a small mom and pop operation. Alone in the back, I of course decide like any idi... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1412292520 | 1412294913 | t3_2i510t | t5_2to41 | 23 | ohbae_wan_kanobae: TIFU by using Fire and Ice Condoms
This happened about a year ago. And i was recently reminded of the long forcefully forgotten memory.
So myself and my girlfriend at the time had pretty regular sex. She was on the pill for a while but got off due hormonal issues. So it was back to condoms for me. ... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1412290031 | 1412354609 | t3_2i4wre | t5_2to41 | 7 | DrOziumNarcotics: TIFU By Knocking my dog stoned.
I'll start off with a backround: Rents were gone for the weekend so OBVIOUSLY im having my friends over to smoke a shit load of pot at my house. My dog is half shephard half golden lab so hes extremely smart and you never know where he is, im talking borderline ninja. T... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1412295952 | 1412325710 | t3_2i56km | t5_2to41 | 6 | kurzmite: TIFU by eating McDonalds
I was at the mall today with a few friends and was starving because I hadn't eaten anything since lunch time, so I split on a Big Mac meal from McDonald's with a friend. I took the burger, which was a bad thing to do. I consider myself a little chubby so I've been dieting all week an ... | 3 | 2 | |
1412295574 | 1412298850 | t3_2i55y4 | t5_2to41 | 15 | dfrogman: TIFU by crashing into a pillar in front of the girl I like
So I have a physical disability that makes walking long distances kind of troublesome. To alleviate that issue, I own an electric scooter that I can drive in place of walking when need be. So I have this neurosis about having a girl I like know that I... | 3 | 5 | |
1412294592 | 1412310087 | t3_2i54eo | t5_2to41 | 44 | possibleleper: TIFU by piercing my nose in my best friend's car.
In the words of Gob Bluth, 'I've made a huge mistake.'
Today, I decided I'd pierce my own nose.
Instead of going to a piercing studio, my friend told me how she'd pierced her own nose. She has a double nose ring, as well as having done all of her oth... | 5 | 8.8 | |
1412296732 | 1412299087 | t3_2i57v9 | t5_2to41 | 14 | lurklurklurkUPVOTE: TIFU by lighting the garbage disposal on fire while trying to clean my litter boxes
I'm a noob and this is my first post, so the formatting might be weird. However, this happened today. Just now actually.
I live in a place that is currently quite cold and gets dark early in the day. I am somewhat... | 5 | 2.8 | |
1412296142 | 1412351025 | t3_2i56w0 | t5_2to41 | 43 | PapaPhaan: TIFU by texting the wrong person
This happened a few years back.
I had just moved to Canada from South Africa the year before and so I didn't know a lot of people yet.
One of the guys I knew invited me to his party. I went. Chatted all night with this girl. Got her number. Text for a few days and eventual... | 5 | 8.6 | |
1412298299 | 1412299186 | t3_2i5ad4 | t5_2to41 | 3 | RustyTruk: Tifu by getting promoted
Hey guys, tifu by getting promoted at my job. I am a heavy equipment operator and have to operate a machine that lays asphalt down to pave roads. Well this is like the most unhealthy environment imaginable. The smoke and fumes are terrible. I'm afraid it's going to have negative imp... | 3 | 1 | |
1412297449 | 1412304646 | t3_2i590k | t5_2to41 | 11 | Dracoum: TIFU by browsing Reddit in Statics class
So here I was. Front row seat of statics class with about 30 people behind me. Browsing reddit. I clicked a link with my speakers on. It was porn.
Moral of my story: Do statics in statics class, not reddit
Ripper_Bravo_Six: That nsfw tag tho...
Dracoum: woops.. missed... | 6 | 1.833333 | |
1412296677 | 1412310977 | t3_2i57se | t5_2to41 | 6 | quitethequietdomino: TIFU by exploring an abandoned quarry
So there's this old abandoned quarry about 20 minutes from my place. Since I love urban exploration I decided to check it out. I ignored all the 'No Trespassing' signs and hopped the broken barbed wire fence. After about 10 minutes of making my way through all ... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1412300558 | 1412315969 | t3_2i5e1k | t5_2to41 | 60 | semma333: TIFU by trying to cook while sick.
So I've been sick now for the last week or so, can't keep anything down despite feeling hungry - and I have pain, I'm bloated, hiccups that HURT, etc, pretty sure I have gastritis.
So I make a trip to the grocery store to get a re-supply of Gatorade and sparkling water and... | 5 | 12 | |
1412301151 | 1412312807 | t3_2i5f21 | t5_2to41 | 19 | [deleted]: TIFU by making a girl feel bad about her grades
Today I fucked up real bad.
BACKGROUND: I've been crushing on this girl for a while and worked really hard to get her to notice me. We get along great she is one of those rare gems that knows how to make me laugh and gets my sense of humor. I do really well on... | 3 | 6.333333 | |
1412300782 | 1412345194 | t3_2i5eef | t5_2to41 | 47 | [deleted]: TIFU by forgetting what was under my bed
Well, this just happened about an hour ago and I don't know what else to do besides post it here.
My dad recently passed away, so my mom lives alone now while my sister and I are at school. Of course, we talk to her as often as we can, but she obviously has to keep ... | 3 | 15.666667 | |
1412302685 | 1412304020 | t3_2i5hia | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by not unpacking everything in my new apartment
My boyfriend and I just got a new place in August. The floors are white/light tan color and very nice. In my pile of clothes, in front of my closet, there was a bag with some mens body wash in it. I must have stepped on the bag because the yellow snake ski... | 5 | 2 | |
1412303189 | 1412344679 | t3_2i5idk | t5_2to41 | 31 | SextinaAquafina: TIFU by getting caught by her parents, twice in a day.
My girlfriend and I are in college. We both live at home. It makes sexy times a challenge. We usually aren't up to anything unless there's a parent-free house. We both had time off today in our schedules so we decided to spend the day together. I h... | 4 | 7.75 | |
1412303280 | 1412448527 | t3_2i5ij7 | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by booing a kid with Cerebral palsy
I feel so shitty after this, Reddit.
My school has a spirit week once a year, before the big homecoming game (for non-American redditors, it's basically a week where students dress up according to that day's theme). I go to a very small private school, so everybody k... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1412305869 | 1412346713 | t3_2i5mo5 | t5_2to41 | 979 | blooooooooooooooop: TIFU by having my girlfriend try to wax my balls. Pics in comments - NSFW
My girlfriend and I have an enjoyable sex life, and we enjoy making each other happy. I'm a big fan of manscaping, and typically pluck my balls for maximum softness/mouthability. I was almost ready to start my plucking routin... | 11 | 89 | |
1412304370 | 1412328986 | t3_2i5kav | t5_2to41 | 3 | GhostBuster1011: TIFU by setting high standards for my grades.
I'm not sure if this is really an authentic TIFU, but I still effed up. And I think some of you redditors have the same problem.
I'm a sophomore in high school, and I've had A's and B's ever since kindergarten. My record is clean with no detentions or anyt... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1412305836 | 1412308721 | t3_2i5mmn | t5_2to41 | 15 | InAblink: "TIFU" BY leaving the job i hated
I hated my job, I felt i was not learning anything and that I would not have a opportunity to advance. I had a bad review, was given 30 days to do better and have a reevaluation. INstead I searched job searching and had a interview and a job offer. The offer was a lot more Mo... | 4 | 3.75 | |
1412303077 | 1412344518 | t3_2i5i6a | t5_2to41 | 23 | maleia: TIFU by uninstalling the USB drivers on my computer
So a few days ago I got a notification from AMD that the latest CCC drivers, 14.10 were available. I went through the download process and it got about 95% of the way through before crashing. I shrugged it off because my computer was still running. I have r... | 5 | 4.6 | |
1412304594 | 1412374083 | t3_2i5kmx | t5_2to41 | 57 | yawa_ssot: TIFU getting caught "edging"
So tonight I was laying on my couch watching television, bored which usually leads me to some form of arousal for distraction. My wife was in our room watching that television. Apparently I either let my guard down over time or convinced myself that I have supersonic hearing an... | 3 | 19 | |
1412308570 | 1412309813 | t3_2i5qlr | t5_2to41 | 2 | awildredditappears: TIFU by having a beard.
So I'm 23 years old, think I'm ok looking, and since I can grow a beard, I do. Good thing too because it looks way better in pictures than I do. Keeps my face warm on my motorcycle to boot.
Just now I was using the drive through ATM to deposit a check, when a car pulls up b... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1412308793 | 1412486300 | t3_2i5qvw | t5_2to41 | 11 | [deleted]: TIFU by having sex with a coworker
So I work at a very stressful job. I sell cars. I sell cars for a very fucked up dealership. I fuck people over for a living. I make money by taking innocent people's money and dignity.
Before I sold cars, I was an alcoholic in recovery. I lived a very honest life. I was... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1412311953 | 1412314676 | t3_2i5v3f | t5_2to41 | 26 | Grab_my_buttocks: TIFU by sending my dad a picture of an anus... NSFW
This morning whilst browsing reddit, I came across this particularly distressing gif- [](https://i.imgur.com/jOIePJn.jpg)
I sent it to my roommate because we tend to share that kind of thing with each other. Later in the day, roommate sends it back t... | 10 | 2.6 | |
1412313929 | 1412347514 | t3_2i5xdz | t5_2to41 | 93 | domdomdom2222: TIFU by watching porn that looks like my girlfriends mom.
This literally just happened. So I was watching some porn this morning before leaving for work on the desktop, I live with my girlfriend but she was still asleep. So a while back I found a porn star who looks like her mom. Obviously not something ... | 8 | 11.625 | |
1412309729 | 1412343651 | t3_2i5s7t | t5_2to41 | 7 | Storeetiem: TIFU by accidentally watching porn at work
TIFU. Soooo long time lurker..first time I feel a necessity to contribute..
It began with a regular morning..a Monday to be precise. I got up for work had a cup of coffee, and took off. I walked in still half asleep and started my computer up for the day. Now, for... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1412313004 | 1412339636 | t3_2i5wc7 | t5_2to41 | 48 | skylinepidgin: TIFU by watching Rammstein's Buck Dich and never realized my o(F)ficemate was right behind me
I was having fun re-watching Till and co.'s gigs in Volkerball and in the US, and I stumbled upon this video, showing him with a fake dick that never stops cumming. He sprays his load to their keyboardist and on... | 5 | 9.6 | |
1412317076 | 1412319907 | t3_2i60vf | t5_2to41 | 6 | pink_sock69: TIFU by doing leg day with diarrhea.
Oznog99: Well you were in the right place for it, a shower right there... often people have a change of clothes with them, too.
pink_sock69: Unfortunately I didn't have a change of clothes. I never do, I always shower at home after the gym. I'm one of those people who ... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1412318480 | 1412320096 | t3_2i62aw | t5_2to41 | 8 | lambokid: TIFU when I changed the oil in my car.
I went through the whole process of a typical oil change. First, I drained the old oil and replaced the drain plug. I next took off the old oil filter and installed a new Fram Ultra Synthetic oil filter. Lastly, I poured in 5 quarts of Pennzoil 5w-20 synthetic oil. After... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1412319884 | 1412354337 | t3_2i63kf | t5_2to41 | 7 | Niosarc: TIFU by using Steam.
2 Year old Steam account. 250+ games. Literally thousands of dollars spent on this one account (not to mention the amount of *TIME*!). Due to instability (hacking, scamming, advertising, harassment, etc.) on this account, I decided to make a new one. Surprise! Steam does not allow the trad... | 5 | 1.4 | |
1412319079 | 1412386819 | t3_2i62v8 | t5_2to41 | 105 | throwaway13-: TIFU by sending nudes to my nana.
I attempted to send nudes to my boyfriend of 6 years who is currently out of state for work. However, I apparently managed to click Nana instead of Mikey. I only realized when I got a notification at the bottom of my screen saying "Recipient: Nana. Status: Delivered."
It... | 11 | 9.545455 | |
1412320747 | 1412321575 | t3_2i64eh | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by having sex in space
ELiMAC85: I thought you meant space as in Steamy Purple Algerian Cinematic Elevator.
el_crunz: So did I
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1412321579 | 1412324908 | t3_2i656b | t5_2to41 | 9 | jagbags: TIFU by trying to remove a foreign object from my ass cheek
I was sitting on the toilet at work in the afternoon doing my business. I believe it was pre-wipe when i felt a slight bump on my inner left ass cheek. I'd never noticed it before so using the toilet paper I tried to pull at it. It did not come away b... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1412320006 | 1412360590 | t3_2i63pa | t5_2to41 | 73 | hjschrader09: TIFU by going out for fries at 1 AM.
So if you enjoy Super Smash Bros, you probably waited at your local Gamestop's midnight release. I did too. I don't have a 3DS, but I waited with my friend who was loaning me his and the game so I could get all the characters for him by the time he came home from class... | 4 | 18.25 | |
1412321603 | 1412356640 | t3_2i6573 | t5_2to41 | 166 | Jay_Lenos_Socks: TIFU by thinking it was OK to light a driveway on fire with gallons of gasoline.
Let's get this out of the way--this happened in high school, when you can't find an older sibling to buy beer so you have to get creative with a Friday afternoon.
So it was a Friday afternoon and I took the bus to my frie... | 7 | 23.714286 | |
1412325456 | 1412331242 | t3_2i68eh | t5_2to41 | 30 | Mortis7432: TIFU - Everyone in my office thinks I'm a maniac.
So this isn't an epic fuckup like some of the tales I read on here. My penis hasn't melted and I've not had to go to casualty. So a bit of background. I work in IT for a fairly large company and one of the things I look after is the video conferencing estate... | 8 | 3.75 | |
1412329400 | 1412343145 | t3_2i6bod | t5_2to41 | 20 | ImJustQuietOk: TIFU by drawing a penis on my friend's sister's car
Inspired by /u/NickH850's fuck up..
I fucked up in a quite simple and relatable way. Happened a couple months ago in wild wild west, my so called home of Arizona. One night my friends and I were waiting on someone for something and I took the chance by... | 5 | 4 | |
1412330969 | 1412335201 | t3_2i6cxu | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to get to the front of the taxi queue
This actually happened on the early hours of 18th May 2014, but I have finally recovered, and am willing to come to terms with my idiocy.
Some context: my football team had just won their first major trophy in 10 years, and we had been in the pub for 12 h... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1412334080 | 1412387774 | t3_2i6fiz | t5_2to41 | 297 | xxxakonxxx: TIFU by getting caught reading TIFU at work
So basically the background is that I've recently received a one year traineeship within a law firm whereby i get paid to work and also receive a certificate at the end of this traineeship allowing me future opportunities in other offices especially as im studying... | 9 | 33 | |
1412335455 | 1412350951 | t3_2i6gsz | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU by eating spicy chili
Applebomb511: Did you push it in with your toe
[deleted]: yes, both kernels
Applebomb511: Fairly sure someone is probably getting off to this now
MikeTheBum: [I might know who...](http://gif.mocksession.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/THATSFBS.gif)
gfy_bot: GFY link: [gfycat.com/Th... | 6 | 2.5 | |
1412337061 | 1412345918 | t3_2i6i8p | t5_2to41 | 4 | DaFrozenProdigy: TIFU My mom thinks I am a drug addict
So my mom asked me to stay home on Thursday , so that I could have the weekend open . We'll she wasn't home anyways , so I could find no reason that I should stay home , so I called my friend and he came to pick me up for a little while .. Later , when she came hom... | 4 | 1 | |
1412338130 | 1412342633 | t3_2i6jb2 | t5_2to41 | 19 | OneSexyIllegalAlien: TIFU by dropping my cell phone on a pile of my own feces.
choc_sauce: Well... Shit!
OneSexyIllegalAlien: I'm glad to see this reply so early. Hah
choc_sauce: inb4 the puns
| 4 | 4.75 | |
1412339711 | 1412355223 | t3_2i6l30 | t5_2to41 | 18 | Thisismyfinalstand: TIFU by trying to park in a police garage in downtown Orlando
More like an hour ago I fucked up...
My company has a service call for a large client in downtown Orlando. The arena employee I am coordinating with asked me to park in their employee garage, which says closed to the public, and she gave... | 3 | 6 | |
1412341654 | 1412357861 | t3_2i6nli | t5_2to41 | 9,265 | sloanesteel: TIFU by wearing a sex toy as a bracelet
In 7th grade, like many other pubescent girls, I went through a bit of a "Hot Topic" phase. Lots of rubber black bracelets, leather chokers, pants with suspenders...you get the idea.
One night, as my family was getting ready to go to dinner my dad asked my to get so... | 26 | 356.346154 | |
1412343309 | 1412343596 | t3_2i6q2y | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU when I made breakfast today
I slathered what I thought was salmon cream cheese on my bagel. It was pumpkin cream cheese. It is an everything bagel and it just tastes gross.
But in other news... IT's FRIDAY!
potatohats: Surely pumpkin cream cheese goes with everything!
mwalte4: It is sickly sweet. Som... | 3 | 2 | |
1412341878 | 1412350723 | t3_2i6nx9 | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU by inviting my hookup over when drunk
So he just left, might as well post on here right?
Last night I decided to go drink with my friends since I have no classes today and one of their boyfriends are up. I didn't plan to get drunk but after 5 drinks and me being a lightweight, I got drunk fast. The ni... | 3 | 5 | |
1412340417 | 1412353951 | t3_2i6lyx | t5_2to41 | 33 | ascararar: TIFU by setting a funeral pyre for the mouse I was dissecting
So part of my job involves removing the spleens and lungs of mice for science reasons. This is only the third time I have done this procedure. All the instruments must be sterile during the dissection and this involves 100% ethanol and a Bunsen bu... | 3 | 11 | |
1412344722 | 1412422906 | t3_2i6s9n | t5_2to41 | 64 | bakedestbean: TIFU by getting held at knife point
It all started out with a few casual drinks in our hotel room before we decided we would hit up Bangla Road for a big first night in Phuket, Thailand. We went hopping from bar to bar gradually getting more and more drunk as we went, drinking copious amounts of beer, spi... | 4 | 16 | |
1412345906 | 1412374806 | t3_2i6u4e | t5_2to41 | 209 | Holy_Shit_Snacks: TIFU by browsing /r/NSFW on an ipad while playing Destiny
So around midnight I was playing Destiny, working on grinding out my exotic weapon bounty. While waiting for a level to load, I grabbed the iPad that was sitting on the couch, opened up my Saved section of Reddit, and proceeded to peruse the N... | 7 | 29.857143 | |
1412336333 | 1412354375 | t3_2i6hm7 | t5_2to41 | 6 | thekontamination: TIFU by Cracking my Head Open
So let me get this straight, this happened back when I was only 4 years old so don't judge.
When I was a little kid I loved to play outside 24/7 and one of my favorite things to do outside was play on my red wagon. And one day I wanted to stand up on my red while it was... | 3 | 2 | |
1412348652 | 1412349182 | t3_2i6ym9 | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU By Ordering A Sex Toy
Well, this happened last night. My wife and I saw some Adam & Eve commercials on late night TV a while back, so I ordered us some toys that we saw advertised. I like ordering from the comfort of my home, as most sex shops in my area are pretty seedy. I still use my parents addr... | 3 | 2 | |
1412349056 | 1412372465 | t3_2i6zbe | t5_2to41 | 33 | rubix306608: TIFU by farting on a first date
So, today I went and saw The Maze Runner with this girl I like. Anyway, I was sitting there enjoying the movie, eating my popcorn with my arm around the girl. I've been fighting a cold for the past few weeks, I have coughing fits and they're really wet coughs, it sounds like... | 4 | 8.25 | |
1412350012 | 1412391432 | t3_2i7127 | t5_2to41 | 288 | Beer_: TIFU by telling a patient about a turkey.
I work on an ambulance and was transporting a woman to the hospital from her home. She was very nervous so I was having a difficult time trying to calm her down - understandably because who likes being in an ambulance.
We were headed down the road and the ambulance too... | 6 | 48 | |
1412341798 | 1412358591 | t3_2i6ntk | t5_2to41 | 4 | Henrog0810: TIFU by playing baseball
So my friends and I like to go through phases of playing different sports. Most recently we picked up tennis but now since we're all in college, this type of a thing is no more. ANYWAY, so about 2-3 summers ago my friends and I were going to play a pick-up game of baseball at our mi... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1412353141 | 1412358316 | t3_2i76nl | t5_2to41 | 3 | DraigoT: TIFU by going to the park
It was peak time when all the kids were running rampant and I was just sitting on the park bench near the playground.
Another parent sat next to me, and started talking about their kids. Then they asked "Which one is yours?"
I responded, "I haven't decided yet."
CapnJaques: I don't... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1412353212 | 1412354281 | t3_2i76rm | t5_2to41 | 20 | Lawsonianwonder: TIFU by zipping up my Penis
It was closing time and my boss had just set the alarm. I live 35 minutes from home and really had to take a piss. I knew the timer on the alarm had a 45 second countdown so I though I had enough time to take care of business and still make it out in time. I'm normally the k... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1412350262 | 1412371498 | t3_2i71i4 | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU By shooting a dog in the eye.
After reading a recent TIFU regarding a squirrel and an American football I was reminded of an unfortunate incident from my younger (more stupid days) that seems fitting for my first proper upload of anything, ever, to Reddit.
I was 13, I had been out with my friends havi... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1412353731 | 1412357999 | t3_2i77pa | t5_2to41 | 13 | TheBeardMaestro: TIFU by walking out butt-naked in front of my family
This happened today. I was told that my family (mum, dad and brother) would be going out to a party of my aunts. I wasn't going with them because I had a GP appointment during the party, so I'd be arriving later.
First thing I did was decide to have... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1412355552 | 1412358131 | t3_2i7b32 | t5_2to41 | 28 | docfrink: TIFU by dropping a big glob of mayo down the crack in between the oven and the cupboards.
I was late for work and tried to make my lunch as fast as possible. When transferring a large glob of mayo from the jar to my sandwich it fell off the blade of my knife and down the crack in between the cupboards and ov... | 3 | 9.333333 | |
1412356909 | 1412363116 | t3_2i7dkk | t5_2to41 | 588 | Bermuda_Jim: TIFU by Taking a Shot
I've been on the wagon for 6 months... Not really because I'm a terrible alcoholic, I just know factually that I have the potential to be one so I avoid drinking. Last night I learned that my Mom had never taken a shot, so I took a shot of Jager with her just for fun. Now, I'm a big b... | 8 | 73.5 | |
1412358202 | 1412443743 | t3_2i7fzj | t5_2to41 | -5 | [deleted]: TIFU by burning my house down with an E-Cigarette
I was pretty excited about e-cigs. After purchasing a "good" starter kit and finding a flavor I liked I was able to finally kick "analog" cigarettes to the curb. The freedom was amazing, I could vape anywhere!
I would bring my ecig to bed with me each night... | 11 | -0.454545 | |
1412358366 | 1412433209 | t3_2i7g9o | t5_2to41 | 38 | [deleted]: TIFU By rupturing a vein in my penis
So unlike most posts this actually happened today.
Throwaway as this is the most embarrassing moment of my life so far.
I had a shower at lunch time and decided to play with my todger in the shower. A little while after I put some conditioner in my hair to make it all s... | 13 | 2.923077 | |
1412360109 | 1420820594 | t3_2i7jid | t5_2to41 | 2,811 | I-Love-Roach: TIFU by admitting to my girlfriend that I pretend she is a giant cockroach when we have sex.
Ever since I was a teenager I have had very intense fantasies about having sex with a giant roach.
It started in 9th or 10th grade when we read The Metamorphisis by Franz Kafka. As I started to think more and mo... | 17 | 165.352941 | |
1412358897 | 1412370780 | t3_2i7hah | t5_2to41 | 3 | -RedditGuy: TIFU by licking an Asian Waiters hand.
So it was my friends birthday couple days ago and he wanted to go to local Chinese restaurant for a succulent Chinese meal.
Apart from the fact they placed us on a 2 seater table between 2 massive wedding tables, it was going good, for a meal with your best friend.
... | 14 | 0.214286 | |
1412352494 | 1412449160 | t3_2i75hb | t5_2to41 | 5 | deinonychusofdoom: TIFU by going to the bathroom in the midst of sporadic power outages.
Yesterday, my college experienced a series of black outs over the course of the afternoon. It started when I was at work with very brief shutdowns. The computers would go off, the emergency lights would come on, my supervisor would... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1412361493 | 1412380641 | t3_2i7m0j | t5_2to41 | 51 | [deleted]: TIFU by not replacing my parent's condoms
When I was younger, I went through my parent's room and I found a wooden box full of condoms in their nightstand drawer. I was too young at the time to know what they were.
Fast forward to my teenage years and my girlfriend was over while my parents were still at... | 4 | 12.75 | |
1412361894 | 1412364658 | t3_2i7mp2 | t5_2to41 | 11 | [deleted]: TIFU: My whole life
It wasn't exactly today but recently my business got into trouble, so I borrowed some money, privately, against my car, which I was unable to pay back. I had not finished paying off the car. Now I have both parties chasing me, 1 trying to sell the car, the other trying to get the money I ... | 9 | 1.222222 | |
1412360524 | 1412364465 | t3_2i7k8w | t5_2to41 | 9 | anadate: TIFU Playing with flamable powder, while standing over it keep it dry.
This was years ago mid to late 90's. Myself and my neighbor whom I'll refer to as Dick, for the purpose of the story, did things like this quite often. Now on to the setup.
The 4th of July was a favorite holiday of ours because we had a ... | 3 | 3 | |
1412363022 | 1412365184 | t3_2i7orz | t5_2to41 | 5 | onlyonembada: TIFU by ordering £10 weed
and now after scouring my house for them hidden coins I can only muster £9.85 and my house has been scoured from post to pillar for that. The drug dealer is on his way and am hoping I can get away with it. Will update.
onlyonembada: Oh yes found 2 more pennies in the bathroom. no... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1412362549 | 1412611520 | t3_2i7nvw | t5_2to41 | 1 | BeaRusscrazyfreak: Tifu by taking a picture...
So a little bit of background here.. im a highschooler and we juat had a horrible doing nothing in class day.. so last period (this ligit happened not 5 mins ago..) its math. Ight ok supply teacher cool! And plus hes kinda cute that always helps. He gives us paper work and... | 4 | 0.25 | |
1412358885 | 1412375913 | t3_2i7h9w | t5_2to41 | 4 | Avg-Gamer: TIFU by going to my friends house to play Destiny
(FYI: my friend lives about an hour from me)
Just got to a level high enough to do the highest strike playlists so we were both psyched up and ready to play and little did we know that Destiny doesn't have split screen so I had to go back home and by the time... | 4 | 1 | |
1412362444 | 1412365611 | t3_2i7np7 | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU-July and August actually do have 31 days
At work the other day, a co worker and I looked at a trouble ticket where we had a validation code that would throw a warning beyond 90 days since a closure date.
The closure date was June 30th. The submission date was Sept 29.
So the vendor was complaining ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1412363920 | 1412382102 | t3_2i7qax | t5_2to41 | 556 | FourtyToFreedom: TIFU by squeezing my kitten
OK so I just bought this kitten
http://imgur.com/AStInnA
He's small and cuddly. Today I was sitting on the chair in that photo, holding him. I held him up at about eye level, with my hands around his stomach, because his belly fat is fun to hold (if you've held a kitten you... | 6 | 92.666667 | |
1412364950 | 1412446219 | t3_2i7s8e | t5_2to41 | 9 | gorillazrule: tifu by getting arrested over Spirited Away
This literally just happened in the span of the last hour.
I had woken up late. That's alright, because today is friday, and all we're doing in first period is watching Spirited Away, because it's the last week before fall intermission. I was nothing but wrong.
... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1412365483 | 1412367704 | t3_2i7t6p | t5_2to41 | 7 | Tosserlad696: TIFU by browsing r/creepyPMs while doing science
This happened a few weeks ago. I was going to post about it then, reconsidered doing so, but have since decided that I need to get it off my chest.
I am an assistant on a research project at my university. The lab consists of two rooms separated by a two-... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1412365776 | 1412484599 | t3_2i7tpj | t5_2to41 | 5 | im_throwing_sexy_bac: TIFU by giving my gf strong marijuana which caused a seizure.
Two days ago, I brought my gf to the hospital. She had severe abdominal pain. All tests were negative, we were eventually sent home with pain and nausea medicine. (She had mono this past month, one idea was that it was just a normal ... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1412365779 | 1412813126 | t3_2i7tpz | t5_2to41 | 4 | TJ_Nicklebauer: TIFU by having sex at my gf's parent's house.
CSLouisHighEdition: I'm glad you got better. Or are you dictating while the dog types?
TJ_Nicklebauer: Luckily the paralyzation was only temporary.
Thank you for asking. :)
CSLouisHighEdition: I really hope you find help, dude.
TJ_Nicklebauer: Thank you. T... | 12 | 0.333333 | |
1412361198 | 1412366659 | t3_2i7li5 | t5_2to41 | 7 | Devidose: TIFU helping a friend make their mobile phone a bit more secure.
Was speaking to someone that had the same model of phone I used to, and got on to the topic of phone security.
Now while this person isn't a total Luddite, they do only use the default "slide to unlock" option, and I suggested the lock pattern o... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1412365856 | 1419685643 | t3_2i7tvj | t5_2to41 | 38 | thenewker: TIFU by basically telling a guy where to find a pile of nude and NSFW pics of me.
And there's no stopping those pics now.
So there's a kind of sleazy guy I know, let's call him Assface, who's always flirting with me and hitting on me and asking to see my boobs and stuff like that. Maybe a few months ago I s... | 5 | 7.6 | |
1412367202 | 1412375239 | t3_2i7w6n | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling my wife I fear she regrets my recent vasectomy
So, two weeks ago I had a vasectomy. My wife and I have 2 kids who are both healthy and are happy with our family. When my wife became pregnant with our 2nd child, she had a high risk pregnancy with extremely high fluid levels (so high the doctor... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1412363793 | 1412709487 | t3_2i7q39 | t5_2to41 | 6 | porkupyne09: TIFU by being sexually suggestive with my boss
This is not actually my FU, nor did it happen recently, but I don't see anything in the rules that precludes this. When I recalled the incident I knew it had to be shared, so...
I used to work as a mental health tech at a psychiatric hospital. A large number ... | 3 | 2 | |
1412365767 | 1412486091 | t3_2i7tp0 | t5_2to41 | 8 | MamaWillow: TIFU on Tumblr.
Today, I fucked up...by attacking the backwards, discriminatory, and biased views of Tumblr's social justice warriors. The result: much hate and verbal violence. What did I learn? Don't tell a bunch of special snowflakes that they're not that special. Another thing I learned? Stay away from ... | 4 | 2 | |
1412368763 | 1412371645 | t3_2i7z03 | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by eating a single marijuana cookie.
I had never tried the 'juan in any way before, but I have no qualms with it and think it should be legal everywhere. I hadn't tried it because everyone around me always smoked it, and I don't enjoy smoking anything, but when the opportunity to *eat* it presented itse... | 9 | 1.111111 | |
1412369158 | 1412371424 | t3_2i7zoy | t5_2to41 | 51 | pancakepirate15: TIFU by trying to not smell bad
So I play Defensive End at my high school, so as you can probably guess, I'm a bigger dude. After practice two days ago I noticed my jersey smelt HORRIBLE because I sweat a lot. I decided to take it home and wash it like I do every other day, but a day early. Cut to 2... | 3 | 17 |
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