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1668270668 | 1668279964 | t3_ytbqz1 | t5_2to41 | 16 | [deleted]: TIFU by sending sexy pics to my male bff and my boyfriend found out and he broke up w/me
[deleted]
SuccessfulCandle2182: At least he did not lose a smart girlfriend
alenaloin: lol like the one you’ll never get???
these clowns that never had a relationship or what it ensues giving snarky hateful inputs, omfg its rly triggering me.
RavynRydge666: You're clearly not a man, therefore you have possible way of knowing how men think and feel. He's well within his rights to feel as though she cheated and break up with her. If you are a man, quit simping for someone random on Reddit.
alenaloin: lol look another know it all
RavynRydge666: Why are you so salty? Because men have a right to terminate a relationship when it no longer holds any trust? That's messed up.
alenaloin: now you’re just debating with yourself my guy
RavynRydge666: I'm not your guy. And now it's so clear where the root of your problem lies.
alenaloin: well i think that’s pretty obvious so i dunno why you have to bring up that you’re not.. think about that.
regarding my problem whichever one you’re mentioning, thank you for taking time to understand it, its really all i can ask for, your understanding
RavynRydge666: I think your problem is that you're lonely, and want someone to call your own, so your first comment about "a girl like the kind you'll never have" was very telling of how you feel.
alenaloin: my first comment which is actually a reply to another comment.. ok, you see how you say things but actually in reality it wasn’t just like so?! i would say that’s a problem
RavynRydge666: I know it was, I just felt the need to reply.
Jokes are usually an insight into the psychology of another person, if you pay attention.
alenaloin: i don’t rly like judging or guessing, im more about facts and for those you just need standard attention, good reasoning and common sense help tho.
| 13 | 1.230769 | |
1668271218 | 1668363360 | t3_ytbzph | t5_2to41 | 2,763 | Tronracer: TIFU by enrolling in Snapshot with a 6 year old
I realize the title sounds weird. Snapshot is an app provided by my insurance company. The app tracks my behavior while driving and then adjusts my premiums according to the average score. I’m a relatively safe driver so I figured I could save money once they see my driving behavior. The app tracks the behavior over several months and then gives you a grade from A to F.
The app tracks your mileage, speed, hard braking, GPS, and phone usage.
What I didn’t consider was that I drive with my daughter a lot of times and I allow her to play video games or watch YouTube videos on my phone while we drive.
I got a score of a C - today. They informed me through email they will raise my rates next billing cycle because I’m “always on my phone while driving.”
TL:DR my insurance app tracks my behavior and my premiums are determined by my behavior while driving. They think I’m always on my phone while driving even though it’s my 6 year old daughter who is on it watching videos or playing games.
nrith: This is kind of hilarious, but also really appalling, because I frequently use Apple Maps when driving, and that would show up as using the phone, right?
il1kepeanutbutterpie: Unfortunately correct. They even count playing music as being in the phone
onionpal: If I put my Google Maps and Spotify on and keep my phone in the cupholder so I can view the maps without holding my phone, it doesn't count any of that as being active on my phone.
il1kepeanutbutterpie: Really?!
onionpal: Yeah, I've had Snapshot with the Progressive Google Play app for over a month now and have 5/5 stars, and only get docked for phone use when I'm actively using my phone. 8/10 times when I'm driving and my partner picks up my phone it senses that the phone is on the passenger side of the car and I don't get docked for that either. I'm not sure why the app wouldn't work the same way for you and everyone else getting docked for simply having maps or music pulled up.
milesbelli: > my partner picks up my phone it senses that the phone is on the passenger side of the car
What model of phone do you have? I'm surprised it could reliably determine this. I wouldn't have thought GPS alone could be this precise in practice, unless you're somewhere with a really fantastic signal in a convertible with the top down.
onionpal: I have a Galaxy S20, I really don't know how it works, and I'm not doubting others are having that issue, I was just commenting that it isn't always inaccurate for everyone. I was also surprised that it could tell that, when I first got the app I assumed I'd have to just mark the trip as me not driving if a passenger was using my phone often.
I will say that it doesn't always record it as the passenger on the phone, just the majority of the time. I do have a number of "events" listed on my trips that show .1-.4% phone use for those times it doesn't catch that it isn't me on the phone.
milesbelli: That actually might explain it. The S20 is a pretty recent high end phone that supports a host of GPS signals (GPS, GLONASS, BDS, GALILEO, according to [GSMArena](https://m.gsmarena.com/samsung_galaxy_s20-10081.php)). From a quick internet search it looks like GALILEO actually does have a precision of about 1m under ideal conditions. It also seems like the average car is 1.83m in width, so under ideal conditions, maybe it can distinguish between the driver and passenger sides of the car.
I think GALILEO is a somewhat newer technology so it's entirely possible older phones (2018 or older), especially budget phones, might not get an accurate enough signal to do this reliably. That might be why you're not having this issue but others do.
But this is all speculation on my part. I definitely wouldn't trust this app, if it's that dependent on having premium hardware.
Yayman123: That doesn't make sense. The GPS signal has one point of reference, your phone. In the best case scenario (read: never) it might be accurate enough to less than 1 car width. But then how would it know you didn't just change lanes or move left or right a bit.
KingZarkon: A lot of the tracking devices are really just a Bluetooth beacon. The app sees it and knows to start tracking. Maybe by the strength of the BT signal is all I can think of.
Yayman123: But it's just the app? What is the BT beacon?
KingZarkon: The [Bluetooth beacon](https://kontakt.io/what-is-a-beacon/) is like a lighthouse that tells devices it's there. The phone sees it and knows to launch the tracking app (similar to how it may launch your music app when it connects to your radio).
Yayman123: No I know what it is, I'm asking how it's relevant here? Yeah the phone could just connect to the car stereo and launch the tracking app (heck my phone enters driving mode when it connects to my car's stereo), but I don't see how that's relevant to differentiating who's using the phone in a car.
KingZarkon: Oh, I was just suggesting that maybe it could use the relative strength of the signal to guess which side of the car the phone is on.
| 15 | 184.2 | |
1668275575 | 1668313421 | t3_ytdv5l | t5_2to41 | 10 | notintelligent23: TIFU BY DESTROYING MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY BEST FRIEN AND MAKING HER DO AN AB0RTION
Okay, honestly i don't know where to begin, this time i really messed up.
Im (m) 20 years old and my best friend is 19 (f), i met her during college and i fell in love with her, i didn't tell her anything at that time because i thought she would never reciprocate, months later, she confused to me that at the beginning of our relationship, she had feelings for me, and at that time, neither of us had those feelings anymore, the feelings i had for her increased once i travel outside the country for a month, even when we talked everyday i still thought about her all the time, i dreamt of her, hugging her, kissing her, every time she send me an audio i was happy just to hear her voice, once i come back and i saw her again, she run towards me and hug me, believe when i said that was the happiest moment on my life.
Everything went downwards after that.
As my new feelings started to flow, i begun to get more jealousy when every man was around her, and shes beautiful so that happened a lot, we fought over one man she was dating, and accidentaly i called her a wh0r3, i didnt realize i told her that until she explain to me what was that i told her, and i have never felt more stupid on my life, after begging her for forgivenes she denied it, then i opened my hearth to her without telling her that i was in love with her, but i wish her good luck on everything from now on and that i would always be proud of her, no matter what, after that message she told me that i would never stop being friends with her, and that she loves me either way. Our relationship was never the same after that.
I haven't seen her since the big fight, and i miss her everyday, and we still continue talking everyday, a couple days ago she told me she was pregnant, and didn't know what to do, i advice her that she could get an ab0rti0n, but i was to insistent on that, she told me this:
It is one thing for you to tell me that you support me in any decision and quite another, that all the time I am telling myself to ab0rt, ab0rt and ab0rt.
I tried to explain myself, in a really bad way and she told me this:
I'm not interested
If you hate children and don't want to have children, that's your problem. I only hope that you never live a similar situation because as a man it is very easy to say "ab0rt" but you have no idea what it feels like and much more, coming from my "best friend".
I know that men don't have feelings, but what the f3ck.
Now she doesnt want to talk to me, i don't know what she did and i don't want to bother her anymore, but i really need to know if shes fine, and i know that this is probably the worst time on her life to her and i want to be there to support her. I dont know what to do, any advice?. You can curse at me, i deserve that.
TL:DR TIFU By making my best friend have an ab0rti0n
Botboy141: Dude, I'm guessing English isn't your native language which is fine, but holy shit you are all over the map.
Be an adult for a moment. You said:
> Now she doesnt want to talk to me, i don't know what she did and i don't want to bother her anymore, but i really need to know if shes fine, and i know that this is probably the worst time on her life to her and i want to be there to support her.
So now tell her:
I know you probably don't want to talk to me, but I'd really like to know if you are okay? I know this has to be an extremely challenging time for you and I want to be here to support you.
Please let me know if I can be a friend to you.
notintelligent23: You're right, it is not my first language, what does it mean over the map?
And that's a really nice suggestion, a really good one, thanks.
Botboy141: > all over the map
Your thoughts appear very incoherent, scrambled. Like you just marked a bunch of random places on a map. Not like they were deliberately written and shared.
Think through your thoughts and feelings. Write them down. Read what you write. Then write it again. This will help you to gather your thoughts in a more coherent, les a scrambled manner.
notintelligent23: I don't think my thoughts seem incoherent because of my English, but because I'm stupid, but that is a really good advice, I will try it, thanks
Botboy141: Not sure why it came across that way to me, but I do the same frequently. I am a "train of thought" writer. As such, frequently upon reviewing what I write, I go back and make edits so that it actually makes sense to other people.
You may just be like me in that your brain moves too fast sometimes. Or I may just have struggled a tiny bit with your English while reading it stoned and distracted.
All the best with your friend!
| 6 | 1.666667 | |
1669722432 | 1669818132 | t3_z7rto8 | t5_2to41 | 30,822 | jackredditlol: TIFU by hitting on my university professor
A little background.
Since this semester started, we've had an online course with a teacher who's based outside of the country where the master's program is taking place. It's been planned since the semester started that we'd hold the last session together in person where we'll get to discuss the different projects we've all been working on during the semester.
Well that day was today, and I arrived in front of the classroom 30 minutes earlier because I got off my work shift. When I arrived to the classroom where the class is taking place, I noticed a cute girl sitting in front of it eating a snack and is on her phone. I tend to talk to girls on campus a lot, and so I approached her.
"Hey excuse me, wanna see a magic trick?" And I fan out half a deck of cards.
She gets excited and pulls out a card. I do the trick. And after that I told her that the real reason I approached her was because I thought she's cute. She started laughing but quickly stopped. I asked her what major she was doing. She said she's doing a PhD in the field of the subject we're gonna take. And it clicked in my head almost immediately. And the first thing I managed to blabber was, "Fuck".
Cue in 5 minutes of her laughing uncontrollably. I told her this is absolutely not how I envisioned our first encounter to go like and I apologized profusely for not recognising her right away IRL. In my defense, she had a different hairstyle than the one she usually has in class, and I told her again and again that I didn't mean anything by it and I just wanted to make conversation.
She said it's okay and it'll be okay like nothing happened. The class was awkward af and I still feel ashamed about it.
TL;DR: I hit on my online teacher because I didn't recognise her IRL.
cjeam: You’re a masters student, she’s a PhD student, that’s a lot less different than it can be. I’ve known undergraduate students date PhD students, sometimes it has been fine, sometimes it has been creepy, it depends on the specific circumstances.
Still, probably best not to pursue that unless you no longer have anything academically that she teaches and some time passes.
BSB8728: Correct. I met my husband when I was a freshman and he was a grad student who taught a course I was in. I used to go to his office to talk about papers, etc. Finally I asked him out, but he declined because I was his student. So I waited. Three years later I asked again, and he accepted. We've been married 42 years.
XPGamingYT: the persistence
genmischief: Yeah, but what did she do to kill time for three years? Needlepoint?
Internal_Ranger3351: Should she have joined a monastery in the meantime so she'd be pure?
genmischief: I mean, is she REALLY into the sound of music?
Internal_Ranger3351: Why don't you say what you mean?
genmischief: Oh jeez, your one of those. (sorry I triggered you? is that right?)
Internal_Ranger3351: lol. So you think I'm triggered because I asked you to clarify a purposely evasive statement you made. Classic.
genmischief: Not really, I'm only challenging you ebcuase your putting words in my mouth, like a bully who thinks they know me better than I do. Bullies should be challenged, and thus, here I am.
Internal_Ranger3351: lol. I asked for a clarification. I never put words in your mouth. And now you're pulling the "bully" card? Stop. Just explain what you meant.
genmischief: I meat what I said and what I asked. You viewed it with your bullies lense. Really, thats all there is to it.
Internal_Ranger3351: > Yeah, but what did she do to kill time ? Needlepoint?
So you were asking if she did needlepoint for three years while waiting for him and you didn't mean something else? Really?
genmischief: Now you have some issue with arts and crafts?
Internal_Ranger3351: Good lord, you think you're witty don't you? So sad.
genmischief: I dont want to be rude and ignore you, but I also don't want to over invest in this dialouge.
| 17 | 1,813.058824 | |
1668280624 | 1668318200 | t3_ytftz9 | t5_2to41 | 16,754 | ThrowRadad01: TIFU by destroying me and my daughers relationship because i didn't believe her.
I'm not looking for any sort of sympathy with this post, it's more of an awareness.
TW// rape
I (M54) have a daughter(F22) that when she was 14 was horribly ganged raped by 3 guys from her school. but I will start from the beginning. me and my daughter were extremely close when she was younger until she hit her preteen years and found everything i did annoying lol. me and her mother always caught her talking to boys and what not you know normal things. When she reached freshman year of high school we let her out to party, after said party she had a dramatic mood shift and wasn't the same girl. she later confide in my wife that she was raped at the party and i believed her instantly and i went to the police right away and got a report made and a rape kit done.
But this is where things started to get complicated, she started to change her story multiple times, everytime new evidence came out, for example it started that she wasnt drinking to she actually was drinking, then too her never talking to those guys to her actually dating one of them and then to eventually text coming out that she was planning to have sex with one of them. I started to question if my daughter was actually capable of lying about this because she did more than intended and said this because she was embarrassed. My daughter then started to have severe depression and we pulled her from school. one afternoon i just got sick of her constant story changes and i questioned her and i told her to her face that i didn't believe her...i will never forget her face and how i know i actually broke her heart..she then comes back to me screaming and crying that i broke her and that she was a virgin and would never think to lose her virginity that way. She didn't talk to me for 6 months.
Later, 3 witnesses came forward backing what my daughter was saying and I felt like the biggest prick,asshole, dick you name it and I will never forgive myself for what I did to my daughter and her rapists ended up pleading guilty. even with that my daughter had multiple suicide attempts and struggled with her mental health which i feel majorly responsible for. Where our relationship is now is that I do whatever she wants me to.. to keep her happy, I bought her dream car, I pay for her apartment in New York and put her through college. i tried to ask her if me and her can do family therapy, she refuses and says she likes where things are at now which is us talking when she wants too. but i wish we can be in a better place because i found out through my wife she does online sex work now and i wish she was comfortable enough to tell me but i fully understand why she wouldnt want to tell me. I hope the parents of daughters hear this and know never to be me. TL;DR
respectfulpanda: I believe you. And while yes, it sucks that you picked a side and it was the wrong one, I can understand why you would do that.
The hard part is hearing about the suicide attempts, the familiar doing anything just to keep her happy and the refusal to go to family counseling.
I wish I knew what to say.
Edit note:
There is one thing I would recommend. Try going to therapy yourself if you haven't.
You can't live that tightly wound out of fear that she will be unhappy. You need to get some objective direction on how to cope when she does become unhappy again.
I write this because I feel like I am giving myself the same advice.
Deluxefish: You can understand why he would tell his daughter that he doesn't believe her? Seriously?
306bobby: Bro, false rape accusations are A PROBLEM and her story kept changing. This is a really hard situation but yes, what the dad did is very understandable, just not correct. For all he knew it was contentful and she just regretted it, hence the continuing change of stories. That's the cold hard truth of this world unfortunately, thank God the perpetrators confessed
Deluxefish: Your 14 year old daughter didn't immediately admit to drinking or dating boys? Yeah that totally means that your own fucking daughter is lying to you about getting gang raped.
From what OP has told, she didn't really change her story, she just omitted details at first about things a child is scared of admitting to adults (which they only are because of the shitty environment the parents created)
This is NEITHER correct OR understandable. It's really only understandable if you have a similar mindset as the father in this situation, which is telling about you.
306bobby: No, I had a friend at 15 almost go to jail from a false accusation from his ex. Last second she admitted it was out of payback and embarrassment for even being with him. These things do happen often and most of you are too arrogant to want to believe it
Deluxefish: Of course it happens and that it does is a problem, but this about the parents telling their child that they don't believe her because she omitted some details at first. There was no fucking reason for the father to say that to her daughter in this case, and he was wrong for doing it
306bobby: Agreed, but is it wrong to sit down and say "listen, your story doesn't add up and therefore it casts doubt, I need you to tell me everything"? Because I don't see anyone here saying WHAT the dad said was okay, because you're right it wasn't. However, we ARE saying doubting the daughter is 100% understandable
Deluxefish: Saying something along the lines of "you need to be completely honest with me and tell me everything" is fine, but that's not what happened and not what anybody is talking about here. It's not what the dad did, which is what you called "understandable" earlier. Stop moving the goalpost
306bobby: ?? Bro what people are saying is understandable is the action of *not believing the daughter*. Everyone is saying the daughter should be believed no matter what which, IMHO, *is completely untrue.* No what the father did was not okay and never once did I say the fathers actions were. Never implied them either. Goal posts never moved homie, put on your glasses
Deluxefish: Doubting her exact telling of the story and wanting her to be completely honest is very, very different from picking a side against her and telling her that she's lying
"what the dad did is very understandable" - quote by you from your first comment
306bobby: "Just not correct" finished that quote for you.
God people like you are one special breed. Literally pick and choose what fits your argument
Deluxefish: And as I said before in my response to that, it's neither understandable nor correct
You said *what the dad did* was understandable, not just that doubting his daughters telling of the story was understandable
306bobby: That's where the "not correct" comes in dude. That implies that the reasons behind his actions are justifiable, which I believe they are. Justifiable does not mean the actions themselves were okay. Step back and calm down homie, you're too busy trying to shove words in my mouth
Deluxefish: You said, and I quote (again), "what the dad did is very understandable". I don't know where all those other things you're talking about suddenly come from, "understandable" has a very clear definition. And it definitely doesn't mean what you just wrote. I'm not the one shoving words in your mouth, you are the one acting like you didn't say what you said
306bobby: Dude, I can understand his thought process and still think his actions aren't justified. I think you're stuck on my use of did as his physical actions rather than the side he chose. If you're willing to die on that hill so be it I supposed.
| 16 | 1,047.125 | |
1669724112 | 1669795397 | t3_z7sf6j | t5_2to41 | 70 | JenivereDomino: TIFU by driving my own wheelchair into my foot.
So this was last week but the result of the fuckup is becoming somewhat clearer now!
I had a dentist appointment. I'm not overly keen on seeing dentists, so I was pretty anxious and on edge before I even got there.
Now, I should mention I'm a wheelchair user. I have a rather nice powerchair which has a top speed of about 6.2mph. The foot plate is solid metal and the chair is controlled by a small joystick on the right arm.
I will also note that it was a cold day, so I had a large wrap around blanket that's sort of like a wide half sleeping bag to fully enclose my legs and feet up to my waist.
I use the chair due to severe pain when attempting to walk, so when I transfer from the wheelchair to the dentist chair I walk the few steps but with my husband supporting me. My knees decided it would be a fun day to be extra terrible so I was pretty wobbly too.
Now for the fuckup.
I was too anxious to get out so I forgot to power off my chair. This shouldn't be a problem, except as I sat on the dentist chair the blanket had got itself caught on the control lever and drove the chair straight at me, which slammed into my foot and kept trying to go forward at full speed with my foot trapped between the metal foot plate and the solid dentist chair.
I think the only thing that prevented me breaking my foot right there and then was wearing thick snow boots, the lower part have a rubber outer layer then there's a good inch of warm insulated padding. Still, it *hurt*. Like, a lot. And now, a week later, there's some delightful dark bruising still making its way slowly to the surface and still a small but visible swelling on the area that was impacted.
Honestly it's a good job I barely walk anyway.
TL;DR - too nervous at the dentist, forgot to switch off powered wheelchair, blanket got caught on the controls and drove it into my foot which is now sporting a lovely technicolour bruise.
Whane17: Get it checked if you haven't! I walked on a broken foot for 9 months because I didn't think it was broken and when I finally went to the docs he said I was way to late, I'd have to wait to see if it healed properly.
JenivereDomino: If there's still anything dodgy with it in 2 weeks time I will - unfortunately I won't be able to see my GP til after that as I won't be in the area. Pretty certain it's just bruising and mild swelling as there's no loss of movement or other sign of anything more serious, but yeah I'd after 3 weeks from the incident it is still having issues I'll get it checked out.
"Luckily" my nervous system amplifies pain signals by default, so if there was something particularly bad in there I'm almost certain I wouldn't be able to move it or stand at all with the pain, although granted the fact that my standing and walking in general is extremely limited it might not be getting as much aggravation from movement.
Whane17: Yeah, I had no issues either, just some mild pain explained by the bruising. Pain went away after a week or so with the bruising but now and then stepping somewhere my foot would suddenly have a shooting pain and it would start all over. In your situation you may not get the warnings I did and if it sets wrong, you'll have serious issues. I only bring it up because I was very blasé about it due to it not really bothering me and then I'd forget about it. I hope you do get it checked and good luck to you going forward! :)
JenivereDomino: That is handy advice then, and it is appreciated :) I'll get it checked over when I get back from holiday then just to be on the safe side.
| 5 | 14 | |
1668280311 | 1668298527 | t3_ytfpkz | t5_2to41 | 21 | NuttyDounuts14: TIFU by getting 2 jabs at once and then going out
Not quite today, but yesterday and I'm feeling the ramifications of my decisions today.
Yesterday, it was time to make the monthly pharmacy run (thank you chronic conditions) and I figured I should start the winter vaccines.
Oh? I can get my flu and COVID jabs at the same time? Perfect!
Do the paperwork, wait to be called in and get the 2 injections in the same arm.
My aunt and I are going to a party later. I'm getting pretty good tbh. Passed my ACP Photoshop with flying colours, done some pretty major adulting and now gonna have fun.
Took some paracetamol as advised, got incredibly drunk and had a great night.
Got home, got about an hour's sleep then the fever kicked in...
And the headaches...
And the flu pains...
And the throwing up...
And the "my sugars are probably sky high"....
After tossing and turning, I finally get to proper sleep.
This morning, it doesn't feel like my body can support me. Through the hangover, the poor sleep and the raging vaccines, I can barely stand.
Somehow, I've made it through the day and been productive, but now, I can feel everything getting ready to kick off again. I can't even stand up to turn off the light!
Typing this out is tiring
TLDR- tried to be efficient and get both vaccines done at once, completely underestimated what a shit show it was going to be.
Extreme-Kangaroo-842: God, that must have been bloody awful. I finally had Covid a month ago and felt fairly crap from it. Got over that and this week I've been hit with the flu for the first time in my life. Jesus Fucking Christ... I truly had no idea how hard the flu kicks you the balls. Floored for three days and I usually have the constitution of an ox.
Both at the same time with a hangover on top... Feel for you.
Emergency_Ice1528: I had the flu earlier this year..all the other times I thought I had the flu..I’VE NEVER HAD THE FLU. My entire family had Covid, I had the flu. They recovered way faster than I did. I was friggin miserable.
| 3 | 7 | |
1668282003 | 1668286798 | t3_ytgctg | t5_2to41 | 7 | Sorrymomlol12: TIFU For wearing rival attire into a bar and got pranked with Carolina Reaper Blazin wings.
Happened minutes ago, so still struggling with the consequences.
Husband and I and a mutual friend came to a well known wing chain that serves blazin hot wings (ya know the one). Think of the biggest rivalries in the country, we are wearing attire for one of the ones everyone hates and we live in the state we’re hated most, but it’s my alma mater that I went to for cheap in-state tuition and our new state is our home because that’s where the jobs are in my industry. We are suuuper cognizant of this, and are the politest motherfuckers on the planet that tip 30+% and try and stay out of the way. We always come here for Saturday games and because we know we aren’t super loved, we just try to fly under the radar and watch our game quietly in peace. We’ve gotten friendly with the usual Saturday bartender.
Here’s where we messed up I think. She’s gone this week, and we have someone new. Our buddy ordered mild buffalo wings and…. they brought Carolina Reaper Blazin wings. Nbd, mistakes happen. We didn’t think much of it. We’re good sports and thank goodness my husband noticed before my buddy bit into them. They were so nice about it, she was like “oops! I put it in correctly but they put the wrong sauce on, I’ll fix that now but you guys can just have the wings.”
But now we’re just STARING at delicious wings… in danger sauce.
Soooo curiosity killed the cat. And I feel like they knew that we’d do that. Because of course we would. So anyway, the 3 of us are sweating profusely and taking shots of ranch while we tear up probably (maybe?) because of the best prank I could’ve ever dreamed up in my life and tbh I can’t event be that mad. In hindsight, they probs have safety protocols so people don’t unexpectedly get wings most have to sign a waiver for (we giggled with the manager and he confirmed a waiver is required for 10+ wings) but WHAT A BOSS MOVE! Not mad. We had a temptation for Carolina Reaper wings and fell for it hook line and sinker.
TL;DR Wore the hated rival team to the bar, got served Carolina Reaper Blazin sauce, ate it anyway and now we’re riding the struggle bus.
incognitolandshark: But did your team win?
Sorrymomlol12: Yes. By a lot. Which we knew would happen. We were actually more interested in watching another team we like (popular in this area, and shares a rivalry with ours. It’s the one the other bartender likes) win, which they also did. In hindsight it was fine, but we definitely struggled with the hottest of hot wings!
incognitolandshark: Are you going to post an update to let us know the full impact of your decision to proceed with eating them?
| 4 | 1.75 | |
1668285618 | 1668736868 | t3_ythr3p | t5_2to41 | 1,901 | Daligheri: TIFU by roasting someone who had the gall to plagiarize my story.
TIFU.
I write and submit stories for free for everyone to read. Think something like Wattpad, minus the teen romance and erotic mafia stories. Now, I love to write and I also love to read. I had submitted several stories to the website and was searching on trusty ole google to find something that would pique my interest.
That was when I came across something that sounded terribly familiar and clicked on the suggested story. The summary sounded far, far too familiar. As I continued to read, I noticed that this was word for word, the summary of one of my stories I had posted on that same website. I could feel myself fill with rage and when I glanced further, I saw the tags were the exact same, as was the title.
Someone completely stole my story, Secret Window style. You always kind of wish that someone would find your work 'good enough' to copy and claim as their own. Some even consider it a compliment - I used to. But all I could feel in this moment was boiling rage.
I pulled up a review sheet and without much thought, wrote the nastiest review I could possibly leave this person. Who in their right mind thought they could get away with stealing my entire story? Even the hashtags?! They weren't going to get away with this. If my review didn't scare them, then spamming the report button might.
I was satisfied with the 1000+ word hate mail I spewed towards this person and confidently hit "submit".
And I'll be honest when I say, I didn't think about it for a few hours.
Until I received several messages to my email stating that I had several new reviews on that story that was plagiarized. They appear in order of the most recent received. The first one was from someone anonymous and they just asked if I was okay and if there's something wrong with me?
I mean, 'Duh', I wanted to say. 'Someone stole my story.' Thankfully I had the gut feeling to reign in my response for the time being. And it was a good thing, too, considering the next review I had.
It was over 1000 words and tore into me like I had spat on royalty. It took me an embarrassingly hot minute to realize this was the flaming review. Had it been re-sent back to me? Bounced back like Mailer-Daemon?
I wish I could say that.
No.
TL;DR .... In front of about 200 of my trusty, lovely, followers, I had flamed myself.
IceHBerg: You have only one way out now. Your next story must be about a writer who discovers someone stealing his/her/their life and stories, going on a massive hunt for revenge, tracking the person down only to find… it was themselves all along. Make it a secret twin, magical duplicate, accidental clone or alternate reality version… but this way, your flaming yourself can have a satisfying ending and some meta context.
Added: also now you can confidently claim and prove that you are at once your own biggest supporter and critic, having both defended your work and attacked yourself as an author in one fell swoop.
angrynutrients: Or the writer has dementia or something
Daligheri: This is debatable.
Snowodin: If you want to reference both a real thing that occurs and a piece of infamous reddit history (albeit backwards in this case,) have the story be about a writer who is drafting their latest masterpiece (Perhaps for a public writing competition where all or select pieces get shown) and writing down everything on sticky notes. The days feel abnormally shorter and shorter as time goes on, until, after finishing their final notes, they start writing their story... Only to run out of time for the competition. Feeling defeated but wanting to be a good sport, they read the entries published, and they notice a story that's beat for beat the exact story they were drafting...
So they start asking themselves who could possibly have stolen the story from them. One of their family members they pitched the idea to? Their best friend? Someone jealous of their previous works? Introspection turns to paranoia as they set up cameras to see if anybody has been spying on them from the windows, confrontations are made with family and friends...
Until they remember the writing piece. There's a P.O. box attached to the writer's details. They send an angry, scathing letter. Maybe two or three.
A week or three later, they get a phone call... From a post office? The worker informs them that their P.O. box has been full for weeks. P.O. box? They don't remember having a P.O. box... They go to investigate, and they're all addressed to the writer of the stolen story, but the P.O. box is under their name...
End of the story, it's revealed that the writer did, in fact, write the story, set up the P.O. box under a pseudonym, and win the contest/receive a bunch of fan mail. There was/is a carbon monoxide leak in their house causing them to essentially black out for hours at a time, and it was during these periods that they had written the story in full based on the sticky note drafts left around the house.
Responsible_Dentist3: Is this real? Why do I remember reading something vaguely like this a long time ago? I remember sticky notes and carbon monoxide but I don’t think it was the same story.
Snowodin: [I believe you're thinking of this,](https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/34l7vo/ma_postit_notes_left_in_apartment/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x) which is vaguely what my idea was based on.
Responsible_Dentist3: That’s the one! Thank you!
| 8 | 237.625 | |
1669726722 | 1669727717 | t3_z7tdox | t5_2to41 | 30 | [deleted]: TIFU by sending an OOTD to a guy I met on a dating app
[deleted]
PM-ME_UR_TINY-TITS: Da fucks an OOTD?
notanaccounttofollow: I also wonder this…
Side note- does the username work? Lol
PM-ME_UR_TINY-TITS: Outfit of the day apparently.
It has on occasion, loved them every time.
notanaccounttofollow: Amen.
Too many acronyms. I’m getting old.
PM-ME_UR_TINY-TITS: Ikr. Just good etiquette to use the full phrase at least once.
| 6 | 5 | |
1669727185 | 1669732896 | t3_z7tkgz | t5_2to41 | 10 | slimthiccbois: TIFU in the gym by putting a bench under a smith machine while pumped.
So I started to run out of workouts for push day and decided to fuck around and put a bench under a smith machine because I saw one guy doing it earlier last week. Well I was already worked my muscle groups, but didn't realize how fatiqued I really was. So I put the bench down and set up the weights, simple. There was a girl next to me doing her own shit, so I got a little nervous to see if I fucked up bad. Then I started to try to lift it, huh weird how heavy this feels, let me down the weights. Took off all the weight and then tried, literally couldn't press up at all. Now let me tell you I was so, fucking, embarassed to the point where I started to act with my arms like a fucking cartoon character and decided to just fucking leave the gym. I wonder if the other people thought i was trying to impress the girl next to me (news flash, I wasn't). Btw I'm really skinny so I didn't even look like I was trying to impress anyone with my twig arms.
TL;DR, Tried to use a benched smith machine, failed hard while a girl was next to me.
Leading-Amphibian749: Personally I love using the Smith machine to benchpress. Generally feels more stable and balanced and safer
But when it comes to to strenuous workouts like Benchpress, Squats, deadlifts I think it’s better to get them done in the beginning of your workout
At least that’s what works out well for me
slimthiccbois: Yeah seems legit, but my fucking dumbass decided to do it at the end, wanna just end it bro this shit too painful
Leading-Amphibian749: Get some sleep king
And also don’t forget to stretch 😂
| 4 | 2.5 | |
1668287806 | 1668364953 | t3_ytilzx | t5_2to41 | 76 | [deleted]: TIFU by freaking my daughter out about death
[deleted]
neutrino71: Sense of your own mortality is not usually found until you're a bit older. Unfortunately life sometimes has other plans. Acknowledge your own mortality, but use it to show her the joy you take from this fleeting life
stealth57: I remember at 8 or so, I was terrified that I would stop breathing. This was brought on my focusing on my breathing too much one night and the thought popped into my head that what would happen if I stopped focusing so hard? That was a fun night for my mom to calm me down.
| 3 | 25.333333 | |
1668289262 | 1668293785 | t3_ytj6ox | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by sexting with a married woman who was also my best friend
[deleted]
thatCapNCrunch: I suppose the only good thing here is that you feel terrible about what you did.
That was fucking stupid. And you absolutely were part of the reason that their marriage is falling apart, although it’s hard to tell what else may have been wrong with it before.
Don’t be a moron in the future. Keep a clear head, wank to clear your head if you have to and find a partner who is actually available. Let friends just be friends in situations like these.
Psycho_Kronos: Women usually cheat because they are looking for something. People usually lie because they don't want to consider the truth.
So you destroy a friendship because your body is telling you that you are no longer passionate with your spouse? Seems controlling and denying.
| 3 | 1.333333 | |
1668288992 | 1668295763 | t3_ytj2xr | t5_2to41 | 7 | Precascer: TIFU by buying an Xbox
I don't even know how to start this, my head's throbbing from so much stuff that has lead to this moment, and I want to at least have a way to let others know this story.
To start it up, I was looking for an Xbox Series on Shopee. It's a trustworthy website, but it was the customer that brought all this. I found a combo of an Xbox Series X with a controller and 2 games for 700BRL (132USD, using Google to convert). It was already a red flag, but Shopee is trustworthy; it only releases the money after the buyer confirms having the product either way. But then, I tried to get in contact with the seller through the website to check on the box's insides. And then I got an automatic message to contact him on whatsapp and to thank for the purchase. And so, I did.
It was really quite a pain, where the seller started offering me the pix numbers for paying the console and +200BRL for shipping. I paid him, it took days for the tracking code, then in the end, it was stuck at the customhouse and I had to pay extra for getting it free. Doubting from those informations, I tried to ask him who his supervisor was, since those complications were mostly like "my supervisor told me\[...\]". And to raise another red flag, his number was from Mexico.
This guy even sent me pics of his identity and side by side with it, telling that I could report to the police if I didn't got it in the end. And after that, only more and more taxes and payments were asked, in order to get it delivered to my home. And this morning, after so much, I ended up basically drying up my bank account (\~2600BRL, as a half-timer 19yo brazilian dude who still lives with parents) and I tried asking to my uncle. But I wasn't aware myself on how suspicious this could be, which led him to report on the family's group that I supposedly had my phone number copied and was being used by thieves. In the end I could prove myself that I was me but now my whole family was suspicious -including my father and mother. I had to explain all this bullshit to them.
Like, I know, I've been tricked countless times on this and I **really** fucked up, but- sometimes one doesn't have to be that toxic to remember everything the whole day, you know? To the point of ruining both lunch and dinner, and yet my mother had the audacity to say that I "shouldn't be so hard on myself" WHILE YOU ALL WERE
But yeah, I fucked up hard and good because of my own stupidity. And I really wanna burry myself at this point, in shame.
TL;DR: Trust only in buying within the trustworthy website. Otherwise, it really is pure extortion.
tardersos: On the bright side, 2600 brl is $490 usd. That's $10 under retail here.
Precascer: I mean, yeah, I haven't paid what I'd pay for a Series X originally, which is around 4000BRL. But still, it makes my poor hypothetical wallet cry.
tardersos: Yeah I totally get it, I'd be frustrated too. Just think of it as a learning experience.
Precascer: Yeah, I know- thanks, pal.
| 5 | 1.4 | |
1668288670 | 1668369156 | t3_ytiy67 | t5_2to41 | 104 | ArchmageNinja22: TIFU by staring at a projector light.
As the title states, today I made what was probably the stupidest decision of my life- staring at a projector light.
Today was just another Saturday for me. I'm on an academic team for my high school, and today was our economics lecture. During one of our breaks, I noticed a few of my classmates going up to a whiteboard and looking at a projector light. Apparently, they decided to stare at an overhead projector light, claiming that they could see a "loading symbol". I thought to myself, "It's not the sun, so it can't be that bad." Turns out, I was wrong.
It was worse.
Initially, I felt okay. That should have been a warning sign. I've taken quick glances at the sun, but I'd always close my eyes afterward, the light burning me. Since I felt no pain, I thought it was okay. I couldn't have stared at it for more than twenty seconds, but after that, my eyes began to burn. As I walked to my seat, I immediately noticed something wrong- I saw blotches of yellow and pink floating around.
I began panicking. I genuinely thought I had burned a permanent hole in my vision. My friend, thankfully, instructed me to take off my glasses, close my eyes, put a little bit of pressure on them, and slowly open them. After a few minutes, I noticed a difference. Soon, my vision was back to normal.
It's been a few hours since, and the only thing I feel is exhaustion and mild eyestrain- the feeling is kind of like staring at a screen all day. There aren't any major changes, and I think I should be okay. I feel fine, but I do plan on taking an early night.
I'm just lucky I haven't lost my vision.
I'm never doing that again.
TL;DR: Today I stared directly at a projector light and almost lost my vision right then and there. I made it out with minimal eyestrain and exhaustion.
UPDATE
A couple days after the incident, I came clean to my dad, that I did look into the projector light and I was worried about permanent eye damage. As he is a doctor, he said that as long as I looked for less than 40 seconds, I should have no damage. Like I said, I looked into the light for no more than 20 seconds. He didn't get mad; rather, he was happy that I was honest with him, and he reminded me that as long as I'm honest and learn from this experience, he will be happy.
Over the next few days, I've noticed little by little improvement. My vision is, thankfully, back to normal! Unfortunately, most likely because I rubbed my eyes too much, I ended up with conjunctivitis- inflammation of the eye. I've been taking anti-inflammatory eyedrops for the past couple of days, and everything is recovering as expected. Should expect a full recovery within a few days!
Remember kids: Never look into a projector light, or you could very well blind yourself!
I'll probably update gain once the recovery is complete.
Stay safe, everyone!
mat-2018: i'm pretty sure the maximum output of projectors is regulated to avoid eye damage (while only looking at the lens for short periods of time, that is). still never look at any intense light sources and especially not while wearing glasses, they can focus the light more efficiently in your retina and cause the eye to burn faster
ArchmageNinja22: Oh trust me, I am *never* doing that again. Thankfully, though, I just have exhaustion. I talked to my dad (I had to say I was "asking for a friend") who is a doctor, and he said that my prognosis looks pretty good.
mat-2018: Lol @ asking for a friend. Yeah you'll be fine, we've all looked into projectors, even at active welding. Thankfully it's not that dangerous if it's a short term exposure
ArchmageNinja22: Would 20 seconds fall under "short term"?
| 5 | 20.8 | |
1669734011 | 1669780136 | t3_z7wdop | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU by shooting a potentially great relationship in the foot…
[deleted]
GirlsAndChemicals: I see your thought process and understand why you didn't think of it as cheating, but the issue is that you were having concerns about your relationship and rather than addressing those concerns *with your partner* you started looking around elsewhere on your own. You weren't acting as part of a team, like you would in a relationship with another person with whom you wanted to build mutual trust. You were acting on your own, your thought process was your own, the issues you were having in the relationship were your own. You weren't coming from a place of being really *in* a relationship and committed to giving it a real shot, you were coming from a place of trying to just sort it out on your own and testing out other options without even letting him know there was an issue to be addressed. That's what makes it cheating. You'd already disconnected yourself from him before you even went on the dates.
AnnieThymeSugar: Thank you for the kind reply… I think I felt the relationship wasn’t solid enough to address concerns very directly… I really didn’t want to make him feel pressured to change for my sake… I thought he would just think I was asking too much and say it’s over… when I’d gently bring something up it didn’t really get much attention or a willingness for action… one reason I questioned how much he even liked me… but maybe because I wasn’t doing a good job of communicating the importance of the issues to him.
GirlsAndChemicals: Well, take it as a lesson. If you want to give a relationship the best chance you can at succeeding, you have to be honest about how you're feeling and what your needs are even when it's hard and awkward and you're scared to rock the boat. I understand being worried that the relationship doesn't have a solid foundation yet and not wanting to scare him off, but a solid foundation is built on honesty and open communication. It doesn't just happen with time, you have to do some scary uncomfortable shit to make it happen. If you're looking around for someone better while he thinks you're exclusive, not only will that hurt him and his ability to feel secure with you, but it will also hurt your *own* sense of security and trust in him (or any partner, for that matter)--because if you're not really all the way in it, you're gonna be seeing his behavior through that lens too. You're gonna stay looking for signs from him that he isn't really in it either, because that's the mindset you know best. That can become a self-perpetuating cycle really quickly, with both of you sensing distance in the other and pulling away further out of fear.
You mentioned wanting a deeper connection with this person, and really as a general rule, deep connections come with deep honesty. They're a package deal. Sometimes the connection seems to come first and make the honesty easier, and I think that's sometimes what we subconsciously expect from the "right" partner, but I think most often the honesty has to come first. And that shit can be seriously scary--scarier for some folks than others, to be sure. But it can really be worth it, and frankly if you're not willing to be honest you're gonna shoot yourself in the foot every time.
Anyway, from one person who's deeply terrified of being vulnerable in relationships to a potential other, lol, I really wish you the best. Hope you learn a lot from this.
AnnieThymeSugar: Thank you for sharing your wisdom… I hope I learn a lot from it as well. 💔
| 5 | 3 | |
1668299764 | 1668526553 | t3_ytn6j5 | t5_2to41 | 18 | [deleted]: tifu uti in mock exam
[deleted]
AccountantSilent733: Oh bless you. I've had this sometimes when I was young (30F here).
Please go and check this with your GP if you're concerned of an UTI. If caught early it might reduce the chance of getting into kidney infection and having chronic issues later.
Being told off at school for toilet is annoying especially for females as holding it is causing a lot of health issues later on.
Do not worry for getting back to school, might seem hard but if you get bullied report it straight away. This happens to a lot of people, might be stress related too.
If I was you and worrying for it happening again, I would ask for a toilet pass (not sure how it works here as I went to school in Greece).
Hope everything goes well and you have no UTI (it's really nasty).
Icy_Pickle3021: THIS!
36F here. I had chronic UTIs as a preteen. My mom was the "cranberry juice will fix everything urinary" type of person. It never did until I spent my entire teenage years on antibiotics for chronic bronchitis and pneumonia (black mold in my bedroom) and developed an immunity to most antibiotics. The chronic UTIs continued..then full blown bladder and kidney infections. Which led to kidney stones and throughout all of this, frequent urination. Turns out I also have an overactive bladder. My urinary doctor concluded it all started with untreated chronic UTIs as a kid.
As far as worrying about the other kids at school and facing them...trust me, they've all had their share of embarrassment but don't mention any of it. They all have secrets they don't mention. If they don't now...they will. Even the "my life is perfect and I am perfect" types. You'll be ok OP.
AccountantSilent733: The amount of people that went through this!
I hope at some point I'll be able to start something that can raise awareness especially in young girls to avoid this entire situation.
On top of everything, GPs should treat them the same day, if left untreated we all know what happens.
Icy_Pickle3021: 100% agreed! Never know if it's being caused by some type of pre-existing renal disease or other underlying condition, too.
And kids can be so cruel! They have these "bullying seminars" but what does that truly do? In my experience, with everyone I know, that does nothing. But kids aren't taught to stand up for themselves.
| 5 | 3.6 | |
1668301605 | 1668303420 | t3_ytntfi | t5_2to41 | 10 | BittahGenius1: TIFU by losing the love of my life, and than ruining any chance at friendship with her
I love my ex and i am still in love with her and that is something that will never fade i truly believe that. She and i broke up roughly a month ago as a result of a fight where i lashed out at her because she brought up something i did that she didn’t like and due to the timing and circumstances i was feeling overwhelmed and completely blew up at her
I am an awful person for doing what i did. Early in are relationship i failed to consider her trauma from a previously relationship and attempted to get more intimate by asking to see pictures of her naked. Not a very serious request but her having trauma from her last relationship made this an incredibly big thing to her and i didn’t understand at the time how big this truly was. I made sure to reassure her that it was her choice to do as she pleases and she didn’t have to send me anything if she didn’t want to but i neglected to see that with what shes gone through she felt pressured just by the request to do it even if she didn’t want to.
This resurfaced and I didn’t get it until after we fought about it.
I failed to see her problem and throughout our nearly year long relationship i always felt that i was being physically neglected and hearing her bring that up again with all of the built up frustration i had caused me to flip out and it was entirely my fault that the relationship ended.
Now, we remained friends and she even seemed to be showing signs that she would want to get back together and i was happy about this but still nervous of wether or not it would happen.
She eventually told me she preferred to not be in a relationship because of the pressures and simply didn’t have time for one and i reluctantly just agreed with her and respected her decision.
I learned that she was talking to a guy i was aquatinted with and told me she thinks he is cute and of course that hurt more than expected. It resulted in a very emotional phone call where i sobbed and she cried with me reminding me that she still thought i was cute and that she loved me but after what i did she wasn’t comfortable with getting back together.
I proceeded to dig myself deeper
Over the span of a couple days i was having panic attacks and full blown meltdowns back to back basically begging her to not leave and talking about how alone i felt and how much pain i was, mentions of my suicidal feelings and thoughts mixed in and while in the moment i felt like i was just venting out of desperation but in fact i was scaring her.
I was manipulative and evil and wrong and she says she is gonna reduce contact with me. I asked her if i could give her the last few gifts i had set up for her when we were together and she said sure and thats that.
Ive lost my best friend, soulmate, and the only person who ever seemed to truly care about me because i was selfish and angry and desperate to keep her.
I could go on and on about how im feeling and how painful this all is but this post is long enough.
Ill always love her, and im not going to date again. And there is part of me thats hopes someday she and i can be happy together but i dont deserve that. I want her to be happy. So im gonna let her move on and be happy
Feel free to criticize me, ive been doing it to myself nonstop and the numbness ive been feeling is scary.
Thank you for reading
As for this girl, i love you, and i want everyone to know that. Goodbye <3
TL;DR i fucked up any future contact with the love of my life because i was selfish and manipulative
evogg22: It's hard but take some time to yourself, focus on you.
The state you're in now, it's just a codependency.
Work on yourself, focus on yourself.
If it's meant to be, it'll happen later.
Right now you gotta figure out your problems.
Good luck my friend, take all the time you need.
BittahGenius1: I made this post right before heading out to do laundry. Im outside of a laundromat sobbing lol, i didnt expect any actual responses or any remote amount of positivity. After losing her i no longer have the support ive needed and despite the guaranteed hate im preparing for it made me happy to have someone refer to me as friend. I appreciate you
evogg22: Take it day by day. It's all you for now.
You're not gonna get hate, everyone makes mistakes, everyone loses a loved one sometimes. We can tell from the post you're not doing okay right now, but it doesn't mean you can't get up from this.
It's time to go no contact with her, and focus on yourself.
There's a chance she might reappear, but if not, you keep pushing forward. Give yourself time. Do things you like, and learn to detach from the codependency you have formed in this relationship.
Sorry if it's overwhelming but it's things I and many of my friends would've wanted to hear earlier. Some of us care too much, but sometimes it's not a good thing.
BittahGenius1: I guess i feel like i want the hate. I havent felt really worth any positivity. It feels nice but i feel like i kinda deserve to be shamed. Thank you for your kinds words im really trying to just keep pushing through
| 5 | 2 | |
1668306254 | 1668308672 | t3_ytpd2q | t5_2to41 | 53 | TIFUweggooiaccountje: TIFU by sexting with a blackmailer
This happened last night, and I think it's important to share it here because of how I reacted.
Let's start at the beginning.
I was on a dating app and matched with a nice looking girl. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary and we had really nice conversations about all kinds of stuff. That went on for a while and then she/he/whatever asked me to continue the conversation on Telegram. In hindsight that should have been a red flag to me, because nearly everyone in my country uses WhatsApp as their primary texting app. But I was happy to continue the conversation else where since the dating app itself is fairly buggy.
From there on out the conversation slowly graduated from normal to some more hot stuff and before I knew it we were sexting and sending photos to each other. Usually I don't really do this, but my horny lizard brain took over and I did it anyway. I think it's because this person let me feel at ease since it wasn't all sexting, I got images back and I reverse image searched them and couldn't find anything. We had some more nice conversations and somehow I let my guard down and shared my Instagram account with this person.
The next thing I got was a video with me touching my junk, screenshots of my instagram and a headshot and message that I had to pay up otherwise this would end up at all my followers.
Of course I was a bit shocked at this, but in all honesty I should have seen it coming.
My response was one this person didn't expect.
I simply told them I don't care if it gets send to everyone and that my life won't be ruined because of some stupid video. Sexting is something a lot of people do and my only mistake was being too horny getting into it and not seeing the red flags. That can happen to anyone.
They threatened me some more and I needed to send €500,- to let this go away.
I just laughed and told them I'm a student I don't even have that much money and even if I did I wouldn't send it their way. Ended up saying one more time I don't care if they send it to other people because sexting is nothing to be ashamed about and then it went quiet. Haven't heard from this person in over a couple hours and I seriously doubt they send anything to my followers.
TL;DR: Started sexting with a blackmailer, missed some red flags, got blackmailed and told them to send it anyway since I'm not ashamed. The blackmailer stopped replying immediately.
angroro: They likely sent you images from another victim so that if you threaten to release their images it'll just hurt the other person rather than the scammer while also making the images untraceable for the average person.
These types of scammers are working on an out of date fear. People these days don't care if those images get sent to others since online dating is now perfectly acceptable behavior and just makes the scammer look like more of a POS. Tell the scammer it'll make for a great teaser promo for your onlyfans account.
TIFUweggooiaccountje: Hahaha that's actually a great idea. I might send that if the scammer ends up replying again!
angroro: Definitely wait for them to reply before hitting them with the OF. Nothing brings more traction to an OF account than controversy, after all.
| 4 | 13.25 | |
1668307591 | 1668443498 | t3_ytpszz | t5_2to41 | 5,831 | [deleted]: TIFU by not knowing what “fishing in the dark” meant
[deleted]
dieana8638: I thought the actual meaning of the phrase is to search for something blindly.
Spanky_Ikkala: I'm with you here. Always used it to mean that.
FrankenGretchen: This is how we get in trouble. They change shit up and don't send notices.
I used 'thoughty' in a sentence in a convo with a spawn in a dark parking lot and when he fell over I thought he'd tripped.
He fell over my words... 😮🙄. The only reason I'm not still hearing about that is I've done other things since.
OobleCaboodle: Thoughty? Spawn? Have i had a stroke?
zork3001: Thoughty = thottie. Spawn is one’s offspring (usually grown).
OobleCaboodle: Thottie? I'm still confused. Do you actually talk like this to people?
zork3001: Not I. I have a hard enough time being understood as it is.
Just asplainin why a young person would be surprised if their parent inadvertently used the word.
| 8 | 728.875 | |
1668604549 | 1668646970 | t3_ywt16q | t5_2to41 | 18,203 | throwawayyyyy2000n6: TIFU and my mom slipped on my cum
[removed]
Ahmadden: Since you were in the bathroom why you didn't grap toilet paper and nut in it. You should always have paper towels when wanking lol.
Moam213: better yet just finish into the toilet and flush
Ahmadden: That's kinda hard we can't aim it down the toilet if it's erect.
Moam213: speak for yourself mate i’ve been doing it for years
Ahmadden: Such a legend lmao.
Flareing: I exclusively do the same, thought that was the norm for people XD
Cherego: Doesnt the dick get against the toilet when pushing it down while sitting there?
Flareing: I turn around and kinda kneel over it tbh 🤣
HairyEmuBallsack: Imagine how fucking weird you would look if someone else saw that
Flareing: Don't make me feel self-conscious masturbating in my own home! 🤣
MisterZoga: I've been watching for a while. It's nothing special, don't worry.
Flareing: Thank God someone has been keeping an eye out!
| 13 | 1,400.230769 | |
1668309823 | 1668316255 | t3_ytqizb | t5_2to41 | 138 | Aerie-Sw: TIFU by crapping myself at the Gucci store.
Ok, it goes like this. I went shopping at a high end mall today. On the way there, I felt some telltale cramping but ignored it. It’s just gas, right? Wrong. Took a bathroom break to take care of business and that relieved the cramping. I’m good now, right? Wrong again. Not that I could afford anything there, but I stopped at the Gucci store just to browse. Suddenly, my guts start to rumble and I am overcome with the most intense sphincter pressure imaginable. As I run out of the store, I feel the contents of my colon rapidly escaping my body, despite my efforts to clench while running. I stop by the cookie store to find out where the nearest bathroom is. Poor guy had to notice the look of pure desperation on my face. The bathroom is in Nordstrom. Curse them for not having bathroom signage. By the time I clench/run into Nordstrom, I can smell the foul odor and it’s bad. I can’t find that unmarked bathroom so my stinky self has to stop twice to ask clerks where the bathroom is. By the smell, they might have figured out my issue. By then, I didn’t care, I just had to get to a bathroom STAT. I finally get to the bathroom and rush into a stall. Thankfully there’s complete privacy. The door and walls go to the floor with no gaps. I get my pants off to survey the damage and it’s a horror show in there. Crap all over me, my underwear, my pants. I throw my underwear away and take at least 15 minutes cleaning myself and my pants, then another few minutes washing up. Thankfully, the bathroom was by the perfume counter. I doused myself with a random scent and got the hell out of there. And that, my friends, will be my last visit to Nordstrom and Gucci or even that mall.
TL;DR: I crapped all over myself at the mall and had throw my underwear away
harleyspoison267: Oh man I feel this. I got sick on a road trip once and there was a lot of road construction, so every gas station and different place I tried to go to for a bathroom I either couldn't get to or was closed. I finally managed to pass a shell station... But it was bad. I didn't even do my usual "buy a bottle of water to justify bathroom use" thing. It was too embarrassing. Thankfully it was a small suburb with a Kroger nearby so I bought some wipes and underwear before continuing to my next destination. I was so upset.
Aerie-Sw: It was terrible and there was nothing I could do to stop it
harleyspoison267: Awh Hun that's awful. At least when I was at the gas station/grocery store, i was kind of anonymous. I would have hated doing it around a bunch of rich snobs. I hate being in places like that to begin with.
| 4 | 34.5 | |
1669746501 | 1669786255 | t3_z81ugg | t5_2to41 | 6,528 | [deleted]: TIFU by giving my girlfriend a gag gift for our anniversary
[deleted]
ariphron: Rule one of gag gift buying. You buy the gag gift give first then give the real gift after.
alec_eiffel_: Yep, I bought my wife a Squatty Potty for her birthday a couple weeks ago. She loves the commercial and I thought it would be funny.
I also took her to Paris for a long weekend to see one of her favourite bands.
She loved both gifts.
Edit: the Squatty Potty is fkn awesome. Highly recommend
sjjenkins: Took a squatty potty to my gym’s white elephant gift exchange. Dude who took it home pulled me aside a couple weeks later to tell me how much he loves it.
singleguy79: Your gym does a gift exchange?
sjjenkins: I said gym… I meant cult.
trackdaybruh: Ah, Crossfit?
sjjenkins: Yes. Like I said, cult. XD
HonestCup20: kipup culture.
sjjenkins: Yawn.
| 10 | 652.8 | |
1668313859 | 1668314855 | t3_ytrsm1 | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting scammed
[deleted]
Upbeat_Finding2295: What types of messages were they going to send?
Fire51271: Pictures of our chats and the picture I sent
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1668315489 | 1668397647 | t3_yts9yc | t5_2to41 | 6,358 | floreality: TIFU by informing my SO that I didn't arrive home safely.
My SO and I don't live together, and we both have a lengthy commute to work in different directions. It's become routine that we text each other when we leave work and when we arrive home.
Today, I forgot to let SO know that I had left work. When I got home, I had an unread message: "How's work?"
I replied with 3 messages:
"im home"
"i thought i texted when i left work"
"as it turns out i did not"
I could see that only the first one sent, but I got caught up in a conversation with my roommate and wasn't paying much attention to my phone.
About 10 minutes passed before my phone rang. I had no idea why my SO needed to call me--I didn't think there was anything urgent going on.
I picked up, and IMMEDIATELY my SO was asking "Are you okay? Are you safe??"
As it turns out, those last two messages took some time to send, and my SO apparently had this conversation:
-How's work?
---im home
---i thought i texted when i left work
-It's okay, I'm glad you made it home safe
---as it turns out i did not
-Wait what?!
-Are you okay?
-Babe
-Babe??
-Hello?!
I had failed to respond, caught up in conversation, leaving my SO to fret over me possibly dying in a ditch somewhere.
TLDR: delayed texts informed my SO that I did not get home safely, and I didn't look at my phone enough to realize.
EDIT: I promise this isn't a controlling or toxic relationship! Sometimes I do forget to text, or SO does, and both of us tend to assume the other forgot/is busy/something came up. We fully trust each other to go about our lives and take care of ourselves. The texts are just a peace of mind type thing :) The only reason SO got so anxious/worried was because I apparently explicitly said I wasn't okay. Thanks for the concern, I understand where it's coming from! But I can't depict the extent of our relationship in a short Reddit post, lol.
palegate: "-It's okay, I'm glad you made it home safe
---as it turns out i did not"
If a person had the wits about them to come out with that answer, I'd be more amused than worried.
Unlikely_Ad_7030: Dear beloved
It is with my deepest condolences and a bit of blood in my mouth that I write to you now, to inform you that I am in fact not safely within my abode, but rather curled up in a ditch just off I95. You need not come to my rescue, as the mud here is actually quite comfortable and the homeless vagrants are good company.
From your favorite corpse to be,
Susan
TolMera: Baldrick: “But did he really have to dot the I with his kidney?”
Black Adder: “No Baldrick; I think it just kind of… fell there.”
Salt-Firefighter-194: There is almost an identical conversation in Red Dwarf.
Cat: "What I don't understand is why he went through the trouble of using his kidney as a full stop.."
Rimmer: "I don't think he meant to do that, it probably just..ploped out"
TolMera: The black adder quote is made up, because I knew I had heard this on a show somewhere, and google was not yielding any results for “killed write blood kidney skit”
Thank you for telling me where I had this joke in my head from. Damn Red Dwarf was good
Salt-Firefighter-194: It's one of my favorites and I have like 7 seasons on Google TV. This episode is Psirens. Just watched it last night lol. Always love meeting other Dwarfers.
TolMera: Rimmers world always gives me a giggle.
And the double Polaroid haha
Salt-Firefighter-194: Yes! Did you know they actually did a pilot once for an American version? It was awful!
TolMera: I did not know, I imagine it’s somewhere in the bowels of YouTube?
If you have not, checking out Orville is worth it, another space comedy
Salt-Firefighter-194: Yes it sure is. I will definitely check it out, I think I've heard of it before.
| 11 | 578 | |
1668316196 | 1668385491 | t3_ytshna | t5_2to41 | 316 | Honest-Disaster8262: TIFU by showing my boyfriend a penis
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 6 months now but we've been friends 6 years. About 3 years ago my boyfriend gave me and our friends ding dings as a gag gift for christmas. For reference, a ding ding is a small rubber penis with a face. It's supposed to be cute. When I was cleaning my room I found the ding ding in a drawer. He was planning on visiting so I was excited to show him that I kept it. When he came over we were doing sexy things when I remembered the ding ding I brought it out. At first he was all awww you kept it but then he started giggling, before pointing at ding ding, pointing to his dick and saying ding dong. We had a bit of a laugh about it, but now he won't stop calling it his ding dong and it's driving me crazy.
TLDR; ding dong ding ding is haunting my dreams. Send help please.
Hopp5432: 🎶 Oh...you touch my tra la la
Mmm...my ding ding dong🎶
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VFR6LtEKBVY
Squigglepig52: I'm remember the old talent show episode of the Simpsons.
Millhouse comes out and sings "My ding a ling, my ding-a-ling, won't you play with my ding-a-ling..."
And Skinner yanks him off the stage "This act is OVER!"
UncommonHouseSpider: I don't think it was Millhouse but I love that scene. I thought the kid had curly hair and a high pitched voice?
HandOverTheScrotum: Edit: It's not Milhouse
| 5 | 63.2 | |
1668315507 | 1668351237 | t3_ytsa4p | t5_2to41 | 262 | Reverie_Wolf: TIFU by confessing my feelings to my best friend.
This is a complicated story so bear with me.
My best friend (23F) had feelings for me(23M) for the past couple of months. She told me she had feelings for me a month back. I was not ready for a relationship (due to commitment issues), so when she did confess, I told her I was not interested (Even though I was).
She moved on and starting dating another guy. This had a big impact on me (More than I'd like to admit). So I pushed away everyone in my life and became very solitary. I had also became very sad and bitter because, I had bottled up my feelings.
When she called to check up on how I was doing, I couldn't hold it in me anymore, and I confessed I had feelings for her. She's now extremely mad at me, for saying it to her. And I think I ruined our friendship.
Tl;Dr - TIFU by confessing to my best friend that, I had feelings for her after pushing her into a relationship.
YareCloude: Apparently you were great friends.
Now she's mad at you, but eventually it'll go better.
Don't force anything and let her (and you) understand this situation.
Maybe one day...
Reverie_Wolf: Thank you. I'm in tears!
YareCloude: No problem! Think about yourself and why you did that.
That's at least an opportunity to grow as a person!
Reverie_Wolf: Your absolutely right brother!
| 5 | 52.4 | |
1669749521 | 1669846160 | t3_z837q9 | t5_2to41 | 43 | [deleted]: TIFU by lying about my age
[deleted]
Marrsvolta: No 26 year old, especially one who has a child and was married in the past, should be getting 17 year old girls numbers. What a creep. You should tell your mom.
[deleted]: But it's okay if she was 18 right?
aussie_nub: That's what I don't get. If he was 50 and she was 18. Sure no problem. 17 and 26 and it's a massive problem.
26 and 17 isn't as far apart as people pretend. 17 is basically 18 and at the bottom end of the immature young adult that's still learning the world... which lasts for most people until 24/25. He should be in a different phase of his life but some people are slightly older when they normally come out of that....
Except he's divorced and has a kid. He's well and truly past that point. That makes it a bit gross. It'd still be a bit weird even if she was 21 and not properly matured.
lionhearted_sparrow: No. They have to draw a line somewhere to decide people are old enough to make the decision for themselves. That doesn't mean it isn't creepy for them to be with someone with a huge age difference. It just means that by that age, we hope that they will know that themselves and not need an adultier-adult to intervene. Sadly, that's still not always the case.
There's a huge distinction between "this is the age where you can sleep with any age and it isn't gross" and "this is the age where we think your brain is developed enough to start making this decision for yourself."
It's not "age for sex" it's "age of consent."
aussie_nub: Ok then, why is someone that's 16 allowed to have sex with someone 18 but not 19 (at least where I am)? I understand there's a line that needs to be drawn in the sand, and that's a *legal* requirement, but people are talking about a moral one when they use words like "gross".
I stand by what I said. Mentally 17 year olds and 18 year olds aren't far apart, so either it's life stages that are the problem (which is valid, since they're clearly in different parts of their lives... but so are 50 year olds with 30 year olds) or it's just the numerical distance of the large gap.
lionhearted_sparrow: Life stages are drastically different at shorter age distances the younger you go.
Developmentally, four months age difference in infants is a huge amount. The difference between someone in highschool and a nineteen year old is also huge. The amount of time that makes a difference gets larger as you get older.
But also you missed my point: it is in appropriate for someone in their 50s to pursue a teenager, no matter what side of legality they fall on, because there is an inherent power imbalance due to the experience differential that there is no way to overcome. That means that you can never actually be sure that it is consensual for the teenager (I can’t think of a single reason it would be), which makes it not okay, morally. Legally enforcing the nuance involved post-eighteen would be a nightmare, so instead we trust adults to self govern at that point. To make their own decisions to not be gross. And we rely on morals to gauge that and only enter consensual relationships.
aussie_nub: And yet, it happens all the time. Sugar babies are a thing now where women 18-24 pursue men that are much older. 30, 40, 50+.
| 8 | 5.375 | |
1668320145 | 1668358653 | t3_yttmhj | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling my friends I moved across the country
[deleted]
Devittraisedto2: Tbh it really is a shit move
I'm assuming you've been friends for a long time, of course they'll be sad that you suddenly announced your departure without telling them. Because to them that means their friendship meant nothing to you. All the more that this was just a "prank". They are most likely not going to laugh it off because they were sad that you were leaving without prior notice.
Doesn't help either you cried for an unrelated reason, they're thinking that it's legit that you're leaving. Why would you even continue a lie for this long, and add more lies into the mix.
Jerotonia: I see what your saying, but we all do this kind of thing with each other all the time. I would also like to include that I mention how much they mean to me every time I get the chance, so I felt they would understand, but it got to point where I couldn’t return, and I’m not sure what to do any longer
Devittraisedto2: The longer you don't tell the truth, the worse it'll get. You're already in a bad place anyway, so it's a difference of bad and worse.
There really is no getting out of this one without some repercussions on your part. Since there really is no justification as to why you did what you did outside of "it's just a prank bro"
Jerotonia: You’re absolutely right, and I’m sick to my stomach because of how much I did, I wrote my apology letter but I don’t think I will be forgiven, I do not want to lose the trust of my friends but it’s already been lost and so I thank you for writing this to me, because I’ve gained the confidence to speak up.
| 5 | 1.8 | |
1668319564 | 1668323540 | t3_yttgaq | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: Tifu by having my cats play with my dirty underwear
[deleted]
harleyspoison267: If she does judge you just because your cats took your underwear out, she's not the type of woman you want as your future MIL. Seriously tho, it should be NBD. She's a mom, she's seen waayyy worse!
harleyspoison267: Also at least you don't have dogs...they do a lot more unsavory things with period products 🤢
| 3 | 2.666667 | |
1669752687 | 1669818383 | t3_z84nej | t5_2to41 | 5,243 | kevinhknudson: TIFU by forgetting to bring my wallet to Wendy's
2 days ago, I (16M) went to Wendy's for a late night craving. I pulled up, ordered, and drove to the window, only to realize that I didn't have my wallet. I had no cash in my car and I didn't have any type of electronic payment set up.
Immediately after the man opened the window, I let him know that I accidentally forgot my wallet. I felt awful, as the food had already been prepared so it was too late to cancel. The guy asked me if I had Apple pay or anything, but I unfortunately did not. Then, this absolute legend PAID FOR MY MEAL!
I was beyond grateful that the food didn't go to waste and the guy was generous enough to cover the cost of the food. I felt terrible about not paying for my food, but I ate it and went back home. The next day, (yesterday) I decided that some fries and a chocolate frosty sounded good, and I went to Wendy's. It was at about 8:00 PM, and this time, I made sure that I had my wallet.
I ordered and pulled up to the window, but this time there was a different guy at the window. I paid for my $7 of food with a $20 bill, and when he handed me the change, I asked if he knew who was running the window the night before at about 10PM. Luckily, the guy from before was standing right there, so I gave him $10 for covering my meal the night before.
I'm so grateful that people like this man exist. If not for him, some good food would have gone to waste.
TL;DR MAKE SURE YOU BRING YOUR WALLET
wheelsonhell: I switched wallets for vacation and forgot to put my ID in the new wallet. Didn't discover it until I was 3 hours away and trying to go through the TSA line to catch a flight. That was not fun.
vicemagnet: That’s why I pack my passport in my backpack that only goes to the airport.
chromeVidrio: I always have my passport on me. My driver license stays on the car.
bklynsnow: I wouldn't do that. Your license is used for many things, including taxes.
You really don't want someone else to possibly get it.
chromeVidrio: lol who uses their license for taxes?
You have to drive for taxes?
bklynsnow: When you efile your taxes it uses your driver's license number.
chromeVidrio: Lol only if you opt in to doing that. You 100% do not need to give the IRS your license. Driving isn’t a requirement to pay federal taxes. They just want to collect more data on you.
bklynsnow: I live in NY.
https://www.tax.ny.gov/pit/efile/individual-driver-license.htm
chromeVidrio: Ah, so that’s for your state return. Yeah, that sounds like a personal problem for New York residents. Where I live, a driver license is just for driving, so who gives a shit.
bklynsnow: Do you always have to remember to grab it when you need to show ID?
Just seems like an extra annoyance to me.
I prefer to keep it in my wallet.
chromeVidrio: I haven’t been asked to show ID outside of an airport in like 10 years.
I also don’t carry a wallet.
I use my phone to make payments, and I also carry a wad of cash.
To your question, I carry my passport, so I would just show them that.
It is a better ID as it is federal, so it will be recognized anywhere inside and outside of the country.
I travel a lot. My driver license is basically good for nothing but driving, so it stays in the car.
bklynsnow: Ok, so that works for you.
My passport stays in my safe.
chromeVidrio: It would work for anyone.
bklynsnow: I guess, but as much as I wouldn't want my license taken, I'd much rather lose that than my passport.
Definitely wouldn't be carrying that every day.
It's in my house safe until I need it.
| 15 | 349.533333 | |
1669756395 | 1669759999 | t3_z86d5c | t5_2to41 | 18 | [deleted]: TIFU by losing my temper at my needy, emotionally fragile girlfriend
[deleted]
NoReallyLetsBeFriend: Love how people are hating... Glad none of them have ever lost their temper or patience... Anyway, I hope it works out. Sometimes shit gets crazy or out of hand in the heat of the moment, but as long as you both work through it and acknowledge the wrongdoing, it can be forgiven and forgotten.
If you are physically abusive, that's a different story altogether because you'd leave marks, bruises, welts, etc. That's NOT ok! What you two need is to draw clear boundaries to prevent it from happening or getting close to it, or ever getting worse!
shadesofwolves: > If you are physically abusive, that's a different story altogether
> I grabbed her and pinned her against the wall, and I started yanking her tank top and I yelled at her
?
AutisticPenguin2: Notice the bit where physical abuse is not ok because it leaves marks?
Not because, you know, it's abuse? No, no the real problem is leaving evidence of your abuse where other people might see it.
So many red flags, if this were a soccer match the field would be empty.
shadesofwolves: It's crazy, right?
"It's not bad because there's no evidence"
🚩🚩🚩🚩
| 5 | 3.6 | |
1669757037 | 1669775569 | t3_z86ngx | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU By Sleeping w/ Friend’s GF
Throwaway for obvious reasons***
A few months ago I was visiting an old friend who i hadn’t seen in years and he throws me a party with a bunch of old college friends. Heavy drinking takes place. I’m about to crash on the couch when this very drunk girl comes up and says, “You sleeping here?” Pointing to the couch. I tell her yes to which she responds, “Great I’m sleeping with you.” Proceeds to climb on top and make out with me. Things are pretty great cause I didn’t expect this to happen or who this girl was in the slightest. To cut out all the build up we do the deed and have a fun time, and end up finishing inside of her. We fall asleep and I wake up with her on the couch beside me and I get up to clean up and get dressed. I make some coffee and my friend walks in, before I mention my lucky night he comments on the girl passed out on the couch. “She must’ve been so drunk she couldn’t find her way to my room.” And proceeds to tell me that she is his new gf, and she must have been late to the party. I stay quite and say nothing and go about my guilt filled day. When she wakes up and I get a proper introduction, she doesn’t recall last night.
I got a call from my friend that she is pregnant and they’re going to get married in the Spring next year. He wants me to be his best man, and I just said yes… I can’t believe this total PornHub BS story, I am fucking ashamed.
TL;DR Came in my friends GF, she is pregnant and I’m his best man
Waychill83: So you gonna watch him raise your kid and fuck your baby momma?
IGotTheGuns: That would be my plan, yes.
Waychill83: Well then you clearly ain't "got the guns"...
IGotTheGuns: Gotta let them put in the effort until he’s ready to join the children army.
| 5 | 3.4 | |
1668328651 | 1668368394 | t3_ytvvy1 | t5_2to41 | 184 | [deleted]: TIFU by walking out of the bathroom naked in front of my 62 year old uncle
[deleted]
NakedAndAfraidFan: Why are you upset about the granny panties part? Would you rather have been wearing a thong?
allyouneedare6cats: Not embarrassed by them, added that detail for comedic effect
jovial_jack: On a separate note, sorry dudes are downvoting you for no reason in the comments. Idk why what is
allyouneedare6cats: Not sure why tbh 🤔
FrostWight: Why is she being downvoted in the comments? Seems like a legit TIFU to me :/ Sorry, OP
allyouneedare6cats: It's genuinely fine tbh, I honestly don't really care
Tho thanks for your words, I appreciate it!
HumanStruggle8295: Because she's projecting incest thought on her uncle as if that was the first thing on his mind since you know, he's a man unmmaried and only goes to prostitute per her on sayings which she doesn't have any proof of or anything.
So yeah she's just a shit person to talk about her uncle like that and that's why she's being downvoted.
allyouneedare6cats: Wtf where did I say anything of that 😂
nothypocritical: In uhhh… your other comments?
| 10 | 18.4 | |
1669757204 | 1669768279 | t3_z86q2z | t5_2to41 | 5 | Disappear-1214: TIFU by burning all my bud
FYI: happened like 2 months ago but just remembered this and regretted not posting it sooner.
So I like weed but have always preferred edibles to smoking. I usually get them from a friend of mine, but he moved out of the city so anytime I wanted some I had to wait for us to have a get together which can be infrequent.
At the time I was still living with my mum so I never wanted to try making any myself at home. Figured I’d be in university in a few months and could just wait till then. That was until I found out my mum was gonna be away for work for a week. I decided to give it a try since I’d have plenty of time to get rid of the smell before she got back.
So when you’re making edibles, the first thing MOST people do is decarb. This is basically you “activating” the THC so that when you infuse it into your oil/butter it’ll be stronger. You can do this in an oven. Different people recommended different amounts of time in the tutorials I’d been watching, but none were giving specific temperatures to decarb at.
I decided to just Google it and type Reddit at the end of the question, cause I trust you idiots for some reason. Turns out I was the dumb one cause I forgot that most people on this site are American, so I put my weed in the oven at around 250 Celsius instead of Fahrenheit for much longer than needed at that temp. £30 down the drain. I even still tried infusing the burnt cinders into the butter but then gave up cause I realised that was stupid.
Don’t do drugs kids.
TL;DR I burnt my weed on my first attempt at making edibles because I didn’t consider whether a redditors instructions were in Celsius or not.
DannkHippo: How high were you at this point?
"You don't throw a bong, kid"
This quote sounds relevant, not sure if it is though..
Onto my actual 2 cents..
Rule#420 Timers, timers, TIMERS!
I was a stoner and a chef for a long time. We've all burnt things. Timers are our friends. Even our phones have timers nowadays... sucks this burning was more expensive then others.. but alas, it is what it is. You learned something, so lose, win??
Disappear-1214: Oh no I was very sober at the time. I also did set a timer, just that by that point it was already burnt to a crisp. I guess my oven is really good at keeping in odours though cause I was in the kitchen the whole time and didn’t notice until it was too late
| 3 | 1.666667 | |
1669757799 | 1669788008 | t3_z86zar | t5_2to41 | 359 | B45b: TIFU by sharing old memory with elder brother
We had a get together with a few of our friends and my brother and his gf were in town so they came over too. He knew some of my friends as we all grew up in the same town. We start reminiscing and telling each other fun stories from the past. And my friend, (let’s call her K) who I had a 4-some with in college spilled how we had gone home with 2 guys and in the end since she wasn’t too comfortable swallowing back then, I ended up swallowing both guys cum.
I kept on hinting to her to stfu coz my brother was there and I literally told her that my bro doesn’t want to hear about my sex life. I guess she was a bit drunk and she kept going.
We were all pretty drunk but I remember embarrassingly looking at my brother and he was just covering his face and eyes to avoid eye contact with me.
We obviously didn’t chat about this afterwards. I just said I’m sorry he had to hear the story and he just said he didn’t hear anything.
Tl;dr: Friend told the story of me swallowing 2 guys, in front of my brother at a party.
PracticeAsleep: You need a better class of friend. One who can swallow her own fair share.
KnightCed: Double meaning detected.
Swallowing of secrets and Swaollowing of cum.
Instead she spits out both.
LegendOfParasiteMana: Good bot
KnightCed: *Happy bot noises*
| 5 | 71.8 | |
1669757706 | 1669759398 | t3_z86xx2 | t5_2to41 | 9 | sorrowfulChamp: TIFU and will fail my first class
[removed]
Snowquilter: You have choices. I think your best option is to take your case to your prof. Explain all that you have here (you can skip the high school/ged explanation - it is irrelevant). Ask for help and be willing to do whatever it takes. Ask for an incomplete and bring a plan for finishing the coursework during winter break. Set appointments with your prof for during break (while respecting their preferred holiday/religious practices). This is not the end.
sorrowfulChamp: Wow I’d heard of it but never considered it. I’m going to ask now! Thank you
| 3 | 3 | |
1669758770 | 1669760970 | t3_z87e79 | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by starting a small business
[removed]
shadesofwolves: Not even subtly disguised as a weird ad.
feetsfoots: Genuine questions. I’m not willing to share any of my info here. Reddit is the only anonymous forum I have ever dabbled with, and TIFU is my favorite sub with my real account.
Obviously ads are cross posted and worked. This isn’t.
shadesofwolves: None of those were questions.
feetsfoots: There were 3 questions marks. At least.
And it’s not posted literally anywhere else. I expected hate because I’ve been in the sub a long time. But I also know that this is the only sub I’ve found that gets a lot of feedback and people who would be well versed in things like phone look up, cashapp, and their visceral hate for spammers.
shadesofwolves: Ah, you meant the post.
This isn't an advice sub either.
feetsfoots: Ope. Is that a rule? I always see people giving advice and talking people through their fuck ups. But honestly, maybe it’s a boring fuck up! 😂
| 7 | 1.428571 | |
1668338982 | 1668341249 | t3_ytz122 | t5_2to41 | 11 | samjayne775: TIFU by buying my bf a lego F1 car
My boyfriend is a massive F1 fan, especially McLaren. He also loves lego and I buy him a new set for his birthday and Christmas every year (we've for the Stranger Things set, a Star Destroyer, Millennium Falcon, Slave 1 etc so you get the picture) Although these sets are very detailed, they're not overly big so they are dotted around our house for decorative purposes (this will be relevant later)
I recently found out they do a McLaren F1 lego car which has a fully functioning suspension and everything so I decided to buy it for his birthday because I knew he'd love it.
Unfortunately for me, it wasn't until he unwrapped it this morning that I found out its around 67cm long and I have no idea where we're going to put the damn thing once it's built
TL;DR - Bought my bf a lego F1 car. Didn't read the instructions and it's way bigger than I thought so no idea where I can put it
eldridge2e: the thing about legos is you can take things apart too...
IAmTheTrueM3M3L0rD: No.
The set stays together no matter how space consuming
eldridge2e: oh i forgot you were the OP...also i was referring to the other sets they have and maybe can be placed in multiple pieces and be redisplayed later
IAmTheTrueM3M3L0rD: It was a joke lol, chill
Also a lot of the official sets can’t actually be taken apart once built very easily, often due to the amount of technic pieces
Some like the collectors series AT AT are actually impossible to take apart without using a knife which then can damage the brick
| 5 | 2.2 | |
1669762743 | 1669763067 | t3_z8947w | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: Tifu by losing a condom
[deleted]
Moosebuckets: Why are you keeping condoms like they’re something special?THROW THEM OUT
No-Block6771: Well the disposal of condoms is not usually my job so I didn't think about it
| 3 | 2 | |
1668341638 | 1668343401 | t3_ytzyiy | t5_2to41 | 42 | [deleted]: TIFU when my father walked in on me masturbating and things went as poorly as they could have in a ten second period
[deleted]
Symbolicdeathwish: Using someone else's sex Toys is just Gross Jesus
TSCCaillou: Unless you plastic wrap it first, gotta stay hygenic yknow?
Symbolicdeathwish: ..... Nasty
| 4 | 10.5 | |
1669764941 | 1669846211 | t3_z8a32x | t5_2to41 | 3 | Parliamentjoker: TIFU by yelling at a truck driver who was just doing their job
I feel like absolute shit right now. Anyway. I’m sitting here in traffic in the passenger seat of my friend car and all of sudden the traffic jam starts. In the middle of the wave I see a white truck just sitting there. The back was open and I could see two guys in there just waiting. So when I got close up I rolled down my windshield and yelled “move the truck dipsh*t” and he just stared at me. Hurt. Ive never seen a Man look so hurt. Some guy poked his head from the back of the truck with a box. Who looked so confused. I just broke, however we were to far away for me to yell an apology, so I stuck my hand out and waved. Jeez the guilt. I feel absolutely horrible. I have an issue with anger and I jump quickly. This ain’t an excuse. But DAMNIT. I shoulda just stayed quite. I probably won’t change, but damn. Hey man, if your reading this. I’m sorry, I really am. But damnit dude move your truck! Please!
TL;DR I yelled at a guy who was basically doing his job. Feel guilty.
aussie_nub: Reminds me of the time a car cut me off in heavy rain. Got pissed off at them and gave them the finger as I drove past... realising they were making a signal at me.
Later on I realised that signal was to put my lights on, because the light wasn't low enough to trigger my auto lights to come on. That's why they cut me off... they didn't see me. That was a year ago, so to the lady on the Monash in Melbourne that I flipped off in heavy rain one week day afternoon... I'm sorry.
Parliamentjoker: You feel the same guilt I do, what feels worse here is that we have no way to apologize. It just stays there in your mind. I feel you man
aussie_nub: Honestly, I don't feel that guilty. Like I wish it wouldn't happen and I could potentially apologise, but honestly, I don't let it eat me up.
| 4 | 0.75 | |
1669765613 | 1669770337 | t3_z8adhb | t5_2to41 | 25 | [deleted]: TIFU and potentially destroyed my relationship
[deleted]
MeetMeInMordor: Take what you’ve learned from this experience and apply it to your next one. This relationship is over.
Practical_Nature_573: Yeah, I've been talking to a relationship counselor and was told that I need to give her time, so I'm following her advice, I appreciate your input though, Its nice to get perspectives from others.
farts_n_darts: This is correct- shes made it clear she doesn't desire contact at this time and you should respect her wishes. By forcing your presence/contact on her you'd be super not cool and also harassing her.
I know it's difficult but you need to think about how long you're willing to wait and then follow through by waiting and/or moving on. None of this needs to be communicated to her necessarily- if she doesn't reach out, you'll have your answer.
Practical_Nature_573: Yeah, I’m gonna wait it out though. I’ve known her for a while and friends have told me that this is most likely just a rough patch in the relationship. Thank you for your insight!
| 5 | 5 | |
1668344309 | 1668346751 | t3_yu0yyl | t5_2to41 | 31 | StuckMyDickInCrazyy: TIFU by thinking with the wrong head.
Obligatory this didn't happen today, but about 10 years ago. For some reason I was thinking about this recently and wanted to share this story. Throwaway account for obvious reasons
Trigger warning: >!abuse, gaslighting!<
About 11 years ago (when I was 18 turning 19) I was set up with a girl by a friend and have regretted it ever since. Around the same time I was talking to a girl who I went to high school with that was living in another state but my dumbass decided that the immediate available sex was more pressing than the girl who actually cared about me. I met up with her she was really cute and immediately the sexual tension was all I could think about. We ended up on a beach date and things seemed great and ended up meeting up a few more times and doing the deed, at the time we seemed incredibly sexually compatable and things seemed great.
The first fuckup was finding out she was 16 and not immediately cutting things off. She convinced me that it wasn't a big deal because the age of consent where I live is 16 and she would be 17 in a few months and her parents didn't care. In hindsight, this was one of the dumbest things I could ever do, and looking back on it makes me feel like some sick piece of shit. I met her mom and step dad a few weeks later and her step dad tried to do the typical "cleaning the gun in the kitchen" shit to try and scare me off but we got along just fine. At the time, I was working multiple jobs and just wanted someone to spend my time with during my few hours between shifts and my days off. She ended up taking me to her prom (which I never got to experience mine) and for the most part things seemed alright but this is where things started to go sideways.
One of the jobs I was working was night shift for an airline and typically I would get out of work at around 1 or 2 am and drive the 35 minutes home. This time however I asked her if I could stay the night at her place because I had a work meeting I had to fly out to at 6am. She agreed and told me to just call her so as not to wake up her parents. I showed up and called her multiple times to get no response. I ended up quietly knocking on her window and hearing some muffled voices (which I would later find out was one of the countless times she was cheating on me). Pissed off that I now needed to drive home for 35 minutes just to drive back in a few hours really pissed me off. I got over it quick enough, but then shit started to go sideways.
One night we went to a late movie and came home around 1am. When we walked through the door we noticed her mother was passed out on the couch in the living room and reaked of alcohol. Thinking nothing of it we headed to the bedroom. A little bit of time passed and we could hear moaning coming from her parents bedroom and she started to knock on the wall trying to tell them to quiet down. When she turned back she noticed her mother was still passed out on the couch and she stormed into her parents room to find her step-father fucking one of their friends who she despised. She flipped out and started screaming at both of them.
We ended up getting back in my car and leaving but the nights that followed there was a bunch of fights between us and a bunch of fights between her and her parents. One night this resulted in her and her step-father in a screaming match in the living room as I was about to leave for work and her step-father ended up slapping her across the face. I ended up in a shouting match with him and I took her to a friend's house where she would be safe but I had to go to work. As I was fuming over the incident I ended up calling the cops. Cops showed up at both places and arrested him. I was banned from their house but she wanted to continue to make it work. We ended up just meeting up and driving somewhere to have sex every time we got together after that but we would fight all the time.
Around this time Tumblr was popular and seeing as I didn't follow many people other than her so the posts ended up coming through. Posts of hers complaining about monogamy and other things. We started hanging out with friends when they through parties and such but seeing her drunk ended up turning me away from drinking for a while. A few times she would call me when I was at work and I would find out that she was over at their house already and drunk. I would later find out that she had multiple threesomes with them. The sexual encounters we had over the next few months seemed to constantly be more about her then us and a few of the times I pretended to finish just to end it and move on.
The next fuckup came with us going to New York City together for an event. The little bit of money I was making between my two jobs was not enough for me to sustain this trip but I went anyways because our friend group was going. I was living paycheck to paycheck but had paid for the tickets and hotel already. When we were in New York she threw around money like crazy at the event. Spending around $300 on herself and I ended up running out of money and not being able to get food for a few days. I asked if I could borrow some money for food and she wouldn't give me any. We had an awful attempt at a sexual encounter at the hotel when I tried to be romantic and she was in the shower. On the final day I ended up getting sick and she was completely different. I got a phone call from my mom when we got back to my car and she told me my uncle (whom I was really close to) had passed away. I broke down in the parking lot. She looked at me and asked, "What happen? Did your cat die?" I was furious and drove her home. Every single day after that she would start fights and I think this was her attempt to get me to break up with her. Fast forward to Thanksgiving and my family went away and I had to work Thanksgiving at one job and Black Friday at my other. She wanted to spend it with me but I asked her to not start a fight because I needed to sleep for a 13 hour long shift on Black Friday. She agreed but then ended up starting a fight and doing everything in her power to keep me up the entire time. I ended up bringing her home and going to work. At this point I shut my phone off and went through my shift. During this time I bought myself a new TV and after work rushed home to set it up and rearrange my room. I put on a movie to enjoy my new TV and passed out immediately.
About 5 hours later I woke up and turned on my phone. There was a text from her continuing a fight because my phone was off and I sent a text back breaking up with her. I was over it. She had been posting all over Tumblr all week that she wanted to have sex with other people. The next day she would post about having sex with the guy she had been cheating on me with the entirety of our relationship and having a threesome with her best friend and her boyfriend. I deleted my Tumblr and moved on. I wouldn't hear from her for a while after that. I ended up running into the girl that was off at college in another state a few months later and we hit it off (and are still together to this day almost 10 years later). About a year later I got word from a friend that my ex was posting nudes all over Tumblr and ended up on a revenge porn site. One of those pictures was her with about 5 other topless girls that were all underage. She ended up calling me and blaming me for it and threatening to call the police on me for having >!child pornagraphy!<. This never made sense to me since she was the one who took the picture and posted it on the internet. I blocked her and moved on with my life and didn't hear from her until about 3 years later.
3 years later I was working at my new job as the assistant store manager of a fairly well known shoe store chain. I saw one of the girls I used to hang out with in high school. As I approached her my ex popped out from behind her and just went absolutely mental. Started screaming all sorts of things at me and when I told her to leave she stormed out into the mall screaming and calling me things like >!"pedophile, and rapist" and that I "broke her jaw"!<. When the police showed up she tried to hide in one of the other stores and when they started to question her I over heard them say "at any point after any of this happened did you contact the police" and she stumbled over her words for a minute before saying "yes I did". Police basically told her that if that's the case then it will all be taken care of then trespassed her and removed her from the property.
I ended up moving jobs a few times after that and saw her from a distance but last I heard she was a "littlev making >!pornography dressed as a baby!< and married some guy and moved out west.
TLDR: stuck my dick in crazy and ended up dealing with if for multiple years after we broke up.
And because I know people are going to bring it up, yes I fucked up by dating someone that was underage but at the time 2 years didn't seem like a big deal. I would never ever do anything like this again.
AaliyahK12: My first question is, what sort of job does an "18 year old" have that has them flying around the country for business meetings?
StuckMyDickInCrazyy: It was more a training then a meeting really.
AaliyahK12: That still surprises me tbh but I don't know how common it is for 18 year old workers in the US to be flown across the country for work like that.
I'm still reading this tbh but so far it's just red flag after red flag to me.
Interesting read though.
StuckMyDickInCrazyy: I was working for an airline and it's not that uncommon to get flown somewhere. Yes there were all sorts of red flags but like that song says, "I was thinking with my dick, my shit dumb."
AaliyahK12: Alright that makes more sense thanks for clarifying.
I can't speak for having a penis, but there are only so many red flags I can excuse by thinking with your dick personally.
StuckMyDickInCrazyy: Yeah no kidding lol. Was young and dumb.
| 7 | 4.428571 | |
1668345183 | 1668351855 | t3_yu1bi6 | t5_2to41 | 94 | ProgrammerLonely6705: TIFU by throwing a dead pigeon in my neighbors house
This event didn't happen today; it was a couple of years before covid was a thing. So my friends and I decided to walk in the neighborhood near my house to a nearby park to play football. We were all about the age of 12 at that time. So anyways we took that walk. After a few minutes passed, one guy noticed a dead pigeon on the sidewalk; the guy being the dumbass that he was offered whoever threw the dead pigeon in the neighbor's house 10$.
We knew my neighbor wasn't home since he was a single man, and his car wasn't parked outside his house. Not to mention, he left his window open wide. I was daring and up for the challenge; as I went to grab the pigeon, but just before I could touch it, my other friend spills his expired tomato soup. I was no longer going to make the bet, but my friend raised the price by 10$ again.
Without any hesitation or distractions, I grabbed the pigeon submerged in expired tomato soup and threw it through the window. It landed in a plant pot and was barely visible, hidden behind some leaves.
A couple of weeks passed, and I noticed pest control outside his building; it was as if the smell was so strong you could no longer tell where the smell was coming from. the men from the pest control were bringing the house apart, looking for the source.
In the end, he ended up moving out of the house. However, that wasn't the worst part; the worst part was the fact that he ended up taking the plant pot with him to wherever he was going. I witnessed my murder; it might've been the only time I felt regret after playing a prank.
TL;DR: I threw a pigeon into my neighbor's house, and it landed in his plant pot, and My neighbor ended up moving out with the plant pot.
ItsMafmoo: Why the hell was your friend eating expired tomato soup
Ravenhunter69: whats wrong with expired tomato soup
TolMera: Oh oh I know this one
[bacteria](https://www.iflscience.com/health-and-medicine/student-dies-10-hours-after-eating-5dayold-spaghetti/)
| 4 | 23.5 | |
1669770120 | 1669771709 | t3_z8c9td | t5_2to41 | -13 | Accomplished-Duck138: TIFU using my fiancés laptop
[removed]
Darkassassin07: Wow.
If I was him and found out about this, I'd dump you in a heart beat.
The files are unimportant, but the fact that you'd go digging through his files, contacts, messages, social media..... Jfc
Accomplished-Duck138: They were all open, tell me you wouldn’t snoop.. just a little bit?
potatobreadandcider: Get off reddit and talk to your partner.
Accomplished-Duck138: I’ll make another post on how it went !
potatobreadandcider: For your sake, don't.
| 6 | -2.166667 | |
1668348656 | 1668396847 | t3_yu2qu5 | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by not asking my brother for a charger properly
[removed]
Legitimate-Pie3628: Asian household? Even if it is, the brother is too old for shit like this.
sneezy336: What does “Asian” have to do with it?
Legitimate-Pie3628: Asian and black household do be like that.
| 4 | 0.75 | |
1668349069 | 1668372572 | t3_yu2x9p | t5_2to41 | 2,193 | airportapple: TIFU by being the biggest virgin on the planet
[removed]
Detozi: Ha if it’s any consolation we’ve all done this. I’m 35 and I still have flashbacks and think ‘oh she wanted sex then’. God I was absolutely clueless as a kid
TrixicAcePolyamEnby: Halloween 1998. I was 20 and an assistant manager at Blockbuster. One of the CSRs and I got along really well, and...her being 20, blonde, and very attractive...I invited her as a +1 to a friend's Halloween party.
She showed up in some "Sexy Fill-in-the-Blank" costume, and she and I ended up finding a bed to hang out on. We were laying there, face-to-face...and I just chatted with her. It never occurred to me that "She wouldn't be laying here with you if she didn't want to do something with you." But I was her assistant manager and she had what she described as a kinda boyfriend, so it just didn't cross my mind.
pizza2004: That’s awesome! Imagine how many women have stories where they didn’t want something (and so didn’t ask) and it happened anyway! Imagine if you’d made a move and she hadn’t wanted it!
You made the right choice.
TrixicAcePolyamEnby: Well, I'm polyamorous now, so I don't have a problem being with someone who is dating someone else as well (as long as the other person knows about me), but the manager thing gave me pause.
The only "move" I would have made would have been to ask her consensually if she wanted to make out...I have never really been a move kind of person, especially now since I've learned just how important seeking consent is. If she'd have said no, it might have been awkward at work after that, but I think it would have been fine.
pizza2004: Oh no I wasn’t thinking of any of the extraneous details like her having a boyfriend. I’ve just had an unfortunate past with not being asked or being pressured so I think it’s neat when nothing happens vs a tragedy.
TrixicAcePolyamEnby: Oh very much so. Almost every single femme person I've ever dated has at least one story of being sexually assaulted. Being patient and consensual is the very least anyone can do when interested in someone...that is the absolute baseline for decency.
I share a home with a partner, and when we started dating. She told me that she had a three-month boundary about even kissing. So that's the way things were, at least until about the seven-week mark and she told me she had feelings for me and wanted to make out! That was a nice day. 😊
| 7 | 313.285714 | |
1669770592 | 1669778150 | t3_z8cgn2 | t5_2to41 | 278 | __Wasabi__: TIFU by trying to relax for a moment in my day off
OK so for context, I work full time and have 3 small kids. Due to bills and such I typically work weekends as well for overtime. Today was a special day as I finally can relax for a bit (only in the morning as I have appointments later). It was me and the boys at home (1 and 5 year old). I was sitting on the couch. Coco melon was on as usual. I was relaxing by playing my switch.
Out of no where, my son went up to the fridge and he must have tried to climb it? All happened in an instant. The middle shelf of the fridge fell out with all the cans and sauce bottles and whatnot smashing to the ground with a loud smash! Broken glass and pickle juice everywhere!
I instinctly told my son to get away and not to step on the glass and started packing away the pieces. Of course the baby was frightened and wanted to come over. I had to grab him and as I tried to calm him down he threw up. As I was cleaning he threw up again. And again and again... Did I mention that the kids were sick? Anyway, my trouble maker who dropped the fridge has ASD and no situation awareness and kept asking me to help him with his game he was playing. I snapped and told him to sit and be quiet as baby is vomiting. As I did that baby threw up all over again and I didn't catch it.
I was pretty riled up by now. But then my son noticed he also stepped on glass and his foot was bleeding. So I have baby vomiting and crying and scared and other son crying and bleeding. Floor covered in vomit and glass shards.
This is what happens when I relax for a moment. Lesson learned. Sigh.
TL;DR tried to relax for a moment and son climbed and now my floor is covered in vomit, glass shards and son has bleeding foot.
StarCounterStayer: Sucks dude, but thankfully it wasn’t too bad, the injuries could have been worse
Hope you get to relax soon!
__Wasabi__: Thanks! Yeah I dunno. Lol I have to take my cat to the vet later but after that I'm gonna grab a beer and try to relax lol. Was quite the adventure.
dragonflameXYZ: All ur bad karma just got redeemed at once, hopefully all u receive is good karma now
| 4 | 69.5 | |
1669775065 | 1669786755 | t3_z8eb97 | t5_2to41 | 11 | Decent-Monitor2717: TIFU: I stole from workplace.
Throwaway for obvious.
This happened few hours ago. I have to share with someone or I will go crazy.
I (M) grew up in the family were somehow without trying much my parents instilled me a honor principles while I lived with them. They did it with example rather than telling me much. Hard workers and never took anything that is not theirs or they think they did not deserved it.
I recently changed my work place were I previously worked for 4 years, There I meet my bosses who's moral compass is a bit off I would say. Lying was not an issue for them. And if they are handed something for free that they clearly did not deserve they will not shy away to keep it to them selves.
On top of that my closest collogue and now good gaming friend is way above that. Enjoys illegal substances, fins ways to manipulate taxes, comes up with some scams and so on. Good thing he will not betray or steal from friend, or physically or emotionally hurt anyone. He is loyal to his friends and very communicative with people, as well as very stringboard.
Before this work I read many books by Dale Carnegie, John maxwell and many others that inspires how to deal with people and inspires to generally be a good person. but over the years in the place I worked that kind of faded away. I started swearing a lot more and I know my mindset changed not for the best.
I started swearing way more. Cogut up on some of collogues ideas how to make "some easy money" some are good, but some is shady. I am not proud of that now.
So to the story: I quitted the job worked in as I felt I needed change. I took on the collogue course learning from home that will last me maybe a year maybe less depends on how fast I do my course projects. My goal is to smash it. Get it done as good and as fast as I can so I can look for proper job and real carrier. Meanwhile I took on delivery job for a big company. 5 days work 2 study. My life for next I don't know how many months. I hate new job. Many hours, and exhausting. but I know I just need to be patient and it will all pay of later.
Since we communicate with my ex-collogue communicate a lot he started giving ideas about stealing some deliveries as he knows people who do it over years. I did not listen until today. I had my usual day, go to warehouse, load up from place dedicated for me were it is all prepared before my shift. I start delivering goods. At the end of the day I see my list of deliveries getting very small but I still have goods. I calculate it. I have to much. I check addresses it is way out of my area.
Someone in the warehouse, either loaded wrong shelf, or a system made a mistake. I call my Friend, his first suggestion, is to meet up our common friend who has a car and transfer. Neither of us have a brains at this moment. I am panicking, and he had few drinks. I agree meeting spot after I finish my work before I go to warehouse to bring back official "undelivered goods". We drop in everything to his car and I go finish off my shift.
I never done anything like this before. I had time to back down. I could simply return everything back but I did not. Was it worth it? No, it will never be. I am shaking now. Can I be cough? I don't know. I don't know who messed up and if they know that it was loaded to my van. There are 100+ vans leaving at the same time. Company has money to spare expenses loss, but I don't know they look at the missing stuff. They will notice it is missing right the next day, no doubt. They have lots of goods undelivered and missing every day. I know other drivers don't fully check what they pick up, its part of our bosses pushing us to be faster and just do a general check on petty much everything.
I feel that today I completely stepped over over my moral compass and feel disgusted over my self.
if I slip though and no-one notice. What do I do next?
if I don't, and get cought, that will be the end. Right now I do have financial troubles as well as being petty much exhausted of my current situation. If I get in a legal situation I will not know how to live after being ashamed against my family and friends.
**TL;DR.** I broke my moral compass stealing from place I work, not sure if they will find out or no.
S_A_R_K: That better not have been my PS5
Anna12641: I think I saw that post unless that wasn't you
S_A_R_K: I was joking. It was probably some kid with terminal cancer's PS5
Anna12641: There was a post where someone said they ordered a ps5 through Amazon and it was marked undeliverable
| 5 | 2.2 | |
1669776539 | 1669844211 | t3_z8ex5a | t5_2to41 | 18,351 | [deleted]: TIFU by going to the dr and completely embarrassing myself
[deleted]
treehouse_of_doom: I’m not gonna lie, aloe plant wasn’t the direction I saw this story going. 😂
gospdrcr000: i was half expecting another coconut
Spazmer: I thought it was going to be a forgotten tampon.
harleyspoison267: Seriously though, how do people forget?? Like i have brain damage, i forget all kinds of stuff--my age, what i ate/when I ate, my meds, etc but I have never left a sanitary product in for more than an hour or two beyond the recommended time. It just boggles my mind. Then again, i knew someone who had no idea they were pregnant until they gave birth, so crazy shit does happen.
wagatoto: >>Then again, i knew someone who had no idea they were pregnant until they gave birth, so crazy shit does happen.
WTF
SickPuppy0x2A: There are actually some documentaries about it and being pregnant currently in my last month and having a quite asymptomatic pregnancy I kind of understand it better now. On the other hand not noticing it in the last three months when the baby starts to move gets harder.
But I remember there was one women who was going through a divorce and moved back home and because she was depressed she ate less well and so when she got heavier she blamed her changed eating habits and the depression. And one day she was in a lot of pain and decided to take a bath but the pain didn’t stop and suddenly a foot appeared and she was so shocked. Her family got the ambulance and she gave birth to a girl. She cried a lot in the documentary because she also didn’t avoid alcohol or anything during the pregnancy but the child seemed to have turned out fine from my understanding.
And there was also another documentary where the person only noticed it because she went to the doctor frequently because of belly aches and first the doctors where baffled but then with ultrasound found out she was actually pregnant and quite far along already.
And there are these cases where people convince themselves that they are not pregnant because the consequences are perceived as dire. So their own mind convinces them they aren’t.
Thinks_Like_A_Man: Knew a girl in high school who denied her pregnancy. I remember seeing her in an oversized sweatshirt at break and telling someone I thought she was pregnant. It was a big debate for months. Her family figured it out about two weeks before she delivered. Like how do you miss your 16 year-old daughter being pregnant?
Two other girls I knew got pregnant that year. I went to one’s wedding. She was six months pregnant and her mother forced her to wear a white bridal gown for her shotgun n wedding. She was hugely preganert, too.
Fun times.
Semi-Pro-Lurker: > how do you miss your 16 year-old daughter being pregnant?
Probably really easily. At that age, I didn't wanna show my body to anyone, not even my mother. She accepted it as teen behaviour. Some families are incredibly observant, some aren't. And if there are no other outward signs except the bump, you can miss it easily if the pregnant person wants to hide it.
Rahbek23: Also people can overlook the craziest things if they don't look for it.
If they are for instance not aware she had been sexually active (which is probably common to not have details off at that age) they'd probably go for a long time just thinking she is gaining some weight especially if she is not "growing" a lot like some people.
It's probably obvious in hindsight, but I mean that's exactly why we have the concept of hindsight - it's not necessarily obvious beforehand!
Thinks_Like_A_Man: I really didn’t make it clear in my post but she was noticeably pregnant at 6 months. Like a standard 6-month belly. By 8 months, that sweatshirt was straining AND she wore it in 90-degree weather.
Rahbek23: Hah yeah ok, the if it wasn't pregnancy she would have definitely needed to see a doctor to find out what the hell regardless. That's crazy.
| 12 | 1,529.25 | |
1669775869 | 1670213845 | t3_z8ene4 | t5_2to41 | 38 | SabrinaBrna: TIFU by crying in the shower.
I have PTSD linked to decades of verbal, physical, and sexual abuse. From my earliest memories, I was abused. PTSD manifests itself differently for everyone. For me I have nightmares and severe depression that borders on unchecked rage when I’m not meditating. I love my life now, and the people in it. I am just giving some backstory. I try to hide my weaker moments from my husband, as I love him and do not want him to worry.
Well, last night I randomly started crying after my shower and tried to be very quiet as my hubby was in the livingroom. I thought I succeeded in hiding it. It lasted all on 60 seconds. I wandered into our bedroom, bare assed and started getting dressed.
I had already forgotten the crying event (part of my PTSD is forgetting bad things almost instantly. It was how I survived growing up) I turn around and my husband enters the room with a serious face. I immediately ask “what’s wrong? Are you ok?” He walks over to me and gives me a hug. He says that he “could ask me the same thing”. I stare at him like an idiot for a minute until he mentions he heard me crying in the shower.
I have to assure him that I’m fine, it was just a minute of random sadness. It takes a while to convince him. I feel guilty for worrying him all night.
Sorry it is a bit anticlimactic.
TLDR: Cried because random sad, hubby worried, guilt ensues
unwholesome_coxcomb: You didn't fuck up. You felt emotions. It's okay to feel and express emotions.
I agree with others who suggested speaking with a therapist to help you work through and process your emotions. I'm sorry for what happened to you. :(
SabrinaBrna: I’ve tried. Every therapist has turned me down after one session because
A) I can’t be seen when talking. Or else I break down and just cry. So they have to face the wall
B) the trauma was so prolonged and ingrained that trying to find healthy coping mechanisms is hindered by the fact that my brain literally rewired itself to handle the trauma the best way it could and it cannot be changed
Edit: a word
Patient-Category5275: Have you considered online zoom therapy? You could ask them to turn their cameras off if it makes you feel more comfortable.
SabrinaBrna: Yes. They tried to refer me out due to confidentiality issues. But I can’t be in person and I can’t talk if they can see me.
| 5 | 7.6 | |
1668353598 | 1668522079 | t3_yu4y5y | t5_2to41 | 511 | theworkypop: TIFU by fighting back in my dreams
I dont remember exactly what I was dreaming about or what it was I was fighting about but tifu by fighting back someone in my dream.
A little context about my sleeping situation. I sleep on the floor with a 2-in mattres beside two accent chair with the foot exposed on all fours. I sleep on my side facing left towards the chairs.
I was dreaming that I was fighting and in the dream. I remember that I had the advantage to kick my opponent hard, so I did. I also did kick the chair legs in real life while i was past asleep, real hard, that I bruised my sheen and tore the skin. I woke up not being able to use my right leg properly for 3 days.
Tldr: I fought and kicked someone in my dreams but also kicking the chair in real life while asleep. Was not able to walk for properly for 3 days.
AaliyahK12: Ouch that's no fun.
Your body is supposed to stop you doing this while you dream.
It's why when I slap the shit outta someone it feels like I'm doing it through an atmosphere of jelly.
Trick-Landscape5581: Yeah, it's also why that nightmare of not being able to run away from somebody is the thing. And sleep paralysis too. But there is a recognized condition where people can lash out in their dreams like that. If it wasn't possible, I wouldn't wake up in the morning with my blankets almost completely on the floor. Lol.
Rubychan228: Yeah. I have that and a similar "nightmare" of screaming but no sound coming out. It use to freak me out, but once I realized what was happening it stopped bothering me.
zorggalacticus: I have dreams where I need to say something really important but my mouth is full of chewed up food or something and I'm desperately trying to get it all out so I can speak but it keeps multiplying so I can never get it all out.
I know it comes from my trauma of growing up with an abusive mother and never actually telling anyone about it. If I'd just spoken up about it to someone I might have had a better childhood. Why I'm still having this dream as an adult I'll never know.
nyckidryan: Look into EMDR therapy... it helps the brain reprocess traumatic events and relieve the stress. Quite powerful actually.
zorggalacticus: Honestly it doesn't bother me. Like I don't wake up from it like a nightmare or something. More like a weird after effect that I know exactly why it's happening. I was terrified to say something as a kid. Thought my mom would literally kill me. She'd beaten be bad enough that I pissed blood before so it wasn't so much of a stretch. But one day I had enough and just gave her a shove. She tumbled over like a ragdoll. In her eyes I saw the realization of what I could have done to her. I chose not to stoop to her level. The physical abuse stopped at that point, but the emotional abuse continued. Still does when I go to visit my dad. But a always smiled inwardly from that day on because she couldn't hurt me anymore.
| 7 | 73 | |
1668351563 | 1668408978 | t3_yu40pq | t5_2to41 | 12 | dare_cR: Tifu by being half way around the world
Prolog. I (20m) am in the military and stationed in okinawa. I am originally from the states. I worked with and had a huge crush on this girl before i enlisted but could never work up the nerve to tell her how i felt.
Fast forward to me enlisting going through over a years worth of training and bs. I go home for leave before i go overseas. I yet again fail to tell her how i felt. Mainly because we havent talked in almost a year at that point.
Cut to 2 weeks ago now. Im overseas settled on the new base. She drunk calls me at work on her birthday while i was on break so i sit and talk to her for as long as i can even delaying my duties for about half an hour catching up. By the end of the conversation we agreed to catch uo and keep in touch later.
Since then we haved talked about 1 every 2 days and today she called me while she was at work and we cought uo and joked like old times. Then she brought up that she was going put for drinks again with a friend.
Well she calls me drunk about 4 hours ago now. I talk she paniced over simple stuff i calmed her down then she drops this bomb shell on me. "You know i always liked you and wanted to tell you."
The fuck uo comes from my phone dying and i just charged it to see 5 missed calls from her and a text saying i see how you feel about me. What do i do? I tried calling and messaging her but she wont answer.
TL:DR moved half way around the world, fpund out my crush back in the states likes me, then i accedently ghost her for about 20 minutes and ruin everything.
Update i told her how i feel and she has read the message over 3 hours ago and has yet to replay.
SmileyWillmiester: If she won't answer, text her the truth. The whole truth, bare it all. Explain how your phone died and how you've wanted to tell her this whole time. If she still ignores you, then at least you know you were honest. You can't change the past, but you can decide what to do moving forward
dare_cR: Thank you for the advice any tips on the best way to say it?
SmileyWillmiester: Depends on your comfort level and the type of person she is. But mainly just talk about why you like her, the moments when you feel like she is the one you want to be with. Like what makes her special to you? The more honest the better. Anecdotes of time shared together and inside jokes always help. Good luck ;)
dare_cR: Thank you so much. I have a ton of good memeries with her just from the 3 years we worked together alone. Not to mention all of middle school and high school
| 5 | 2.4 | |
1669778498 | 1669782049 | t3_z8fp4o | t5_2to41 | 15 | weibae: TIFU by breaking my coworker's phone
Sorry for formatting and spelling, on movile.
I was working late on an artsy extracurricular project for work. It was getting late and I realized that it was past the metered time for my car. I had been fined before and we were getting to the end of the night so I quickly cleaned up and left so I wouldn't get fined again.
When I was putting everything away in my car I heard a dropping sound but saw that everything was in my car and assumed the dropping sound was just from inside my car. As I'm driving home I get a call from my other coworker (B) who was working with coworker A and I on this project. They ask me if I have her phone. I then get this dreading feeling that that dropping sound was her phone. I let them know and drive back.
And yup, found her phone in the spot where my car was parked. Did I mention it had snowed today? Somehow I had picked up my coworkers phone in my rush to leave. Pretty sure I drove over it and it definitely has water damage :/
I immediately said that I would pay for it and then followed up with a message saying that even it it somehow is miraculously fixed, I will still pay for a new phone since it's damaged. Anyway I just feel really bad now and thought that maybe posting on reddit will make me feel better, but who knows people may just call me an idiot.
Tldr: Accidentally grabbed my coworker's phone and dropped it in the snow without noticing. Found it later in the snow the screen didn't turn on and I most likely also drove over it.
turtle00671: Accidents happen, it wasn't malicious and you offered recompense.
weibae: Thanks for the reply internet stranger!
| 3 | 5 | |
1669779847 | 1669836951 | t3_z8g7sy | t5_2to41 | 132 | BHasABeard: TIFU By Purchasing my Mom a Dildo for Christmas.
So this actually happened the Friday after Thanksgiving.
This year is the first year my family won’t be able to congregate for Christmas. So we agreed to do a “white elephant” at our Turkey Day because everyone and their SO’s would be there.
When this plan was discussed in the group chat I happened to be scrolling through reddit and saw a post talking about how “Bad Dragon” had an unusually large inventory.
Perfect! I thought. Itll be a great gag gift, and they make great toys, my whole family can’t be that prudish.
For context my family is usually very open with each other, very tight knit and loving family. That being said, I impulse bought, we aren’t THAT close.
The next day after my purchase my brother asked if we were doing real gifts this year and to my dismay the answer was a resounding yes.
Well the day came and everyone selected their presents. Before we opened my mother interrupted and told us about this game she found on the internet where you roll the dice and the number tells you to pass the gift whichever direction.
We opened our gifts and everyone was appalled at the tentacle Dildo.
I tried to defend it. It is a high quality Dildo, I figured one of them was cool enough to want it, its not like it was cheap.
My poor brother who always gets the short end of the stick kept repeatedly having this tentacle handed back to him. It felt like every other dice roll was “give brother the tentacle Dildo he is obviously uncomfortable being around.”
By the end of the game my mother stole it from him so he could have one of the other gifts.
It was a big misfire lololol.
Merry Christmas mom.
Tl;dr: I bought a gag gift that literally and unintentionally made almost everyone at the table gag or cringe.
NoReallyLetsBeFriend: "My dad can't satisfy her in the bedroom ever since he passed away" 🎶🎵
Squigglepig52: I worked for a place that sold stuff for sausage making (we actually sold everything a meat packer or butcher could need, except the meat.)
One day, this teeny little old Italian lady comes in, she had to be 90. She wanted to know how much sodium nitrate was in the sausage spice mixes.
Because, saltpeter used to be added to men's food to reduce libido, supposedly, and she was afraid her husband was being affected by it,because he ate home made sausage.
"The last few months, he doesn't want to make love anymore, and I think maybe it's the saltpeter!"
I said maybe it's because he's over 90, and just running out of energy, and she sadly agreed.
Evidently, some people never get too old to get horny.
itsyoursmileandeyes: I love that this was bothering her so much that she shlepped down there to investigate 😎
Squigglepig52: I know, right?
itsyoursmileandeyes: May we all be 90 and still actively seeking out getting dicked down by our spouses 🥰
| 6 | 22 | |
1669780651 | 1669784132 | t3_z8gim0 | t5_2to41 | 19 | RushAggravating1045: tifu by trying to pay for sex
[removed]
oscurochu: Whether you paid a scammer or an escort, by the sounds of it, that $600 was money you were willing to part with, or you wouldn't have done it
RushAggravating1045: It was a matter of circumstance. It was 2:00am and I was kind of desperate. I had a small amount of hope but it was ultimately my demise.
potatobreadandcider: JOBD jerk off before donating
Post nut clarity hits like a 20 ton truck sometimes but it's always worth it.
RushAggravating1045: I actually did that after the scam. That’s when I realized I was never getting my money back
potatobreadandcider: You deliberately skipped the BD, sorry for the L
RushAggravating1045: unfortunately yes
| 7 | 2.714286 | |
1668356367 | 1668398501 | t3_yu67zy | t5_2to41 | 3 | texas_sexranger: TIFU by showing my friends a video of me having a foursome
tl:dr they did not appreciate
Me and my girlfriend are pretty open. We like to take lots of dirty pictures and sometimes film ourselves having sex. We have some like minded friends who we like to share our stuff with. We also have threesomes regurarly. Recently we had a foursome with 3 girls and we filmed it and it was pretty amazing.
I met up with some friends I've known since high school (2 guys 2 girls) but I haven't seen them in like 6 month because they live in a different state, and we got drunk. When drunk, I told them about my foursome and insisted on showing them the video. I don't know what the hell I was thinking but I decided to connect my laptop to my 75" TV and play the full video to everyone. Everyone looked very shocked and went completely quiet. The rest of the night was super akward and everyone left in about an hour. I'm genuenly not sure if they still want to be my friends. I feel pretty dumb
r0ndy: I think it was the excess of putting it on the tv. You were only focused on you and your experience. Granted you wanted to, share it with them. But, that doesn't work like that with porn. And it was You wanting to share Your experience. Kinda forced it on them. I'd just apologize if you feel bad, and if you don't, just wait it out and move forward like an ignored mistake
texas_sexranger: Yeah I definitely went too far and should have taken the hint that they were not interested in seeing it. We have openly discussed our sex life with those friends and have kind of a dirty humor so I just assumed that they would probably be the type of people to appreciate it.
Ocean_Spice: Why would you think they’d want to see it in the first place?? Wtf?
| 4 | 0.75 | |
1668363414 | 1668381528 | t3_yu9gbb | t5_2to41 | 6 | ThrowAwayTheMask1285: TIFU by sending my nudes to a stranger online
ThrowAway Account btw, So during this morning I couldn't sleep, and something I do in those cases is go to random chat apps or anonymous chat apps. I was on one and I met a girl that was very flirty and sexty and that's rare, but me being bored and lonely continued anyway, eventually she asks to see a dick pic, so I send a picture not thinking much of it. And soon after they put together a photo that had my face (the app allows you to put a pic of yourself, I did, first mistake), the dick pic and some bits of info regarding me that they had asked me before like what city I live in, etc, and then text on those photos saying that I raped a kid.
They then threatened to send it to the media if I didn't pay them €100, me freaking out / it being the middle of the night I start worrying, since I don't have much money anyway, so I tell them I only have €6 since I live with my parents. They then start pressuring me to get the money soon and I don't know what to do so I tell them I won't be able to get that much money, so they give me a week's deadline to get it.
I looked up what I can do in cases of blackmail and I was suggested to block the person and contact authorities. So I went to my local police station and they told me there's not much they can do unless I have some way for them to track this person, so I contacted the app I met the person on and I'm now sitting hoping that they can help in that regard. Otherwise I now blocked the person since they demand some money tomorrow now and I'm hoping I don't have to worry about anything related to that image circling the internet or, God forbid, reaching my family and friends since that will be a hell of a thing to have to explain.
I just wanted to get this off my chest since I don't feel comfortable talking to anyone I know about this, for various reasons. I feel so shit since I knew I shouldn't send images and info like that to strangers, so I fucked up and I hope things don't go south.
Also I know that the blackmail part wasn't my fault, but I fucked up by sharing too much online.
TL;DR I sent a dick pic and some information about myself to a stranger online and was threatened with blackmail involving the images and misinformation, and now I'm hoping it doesn't result in a nasty image and misinformation of me getting sent out online
RandoCalrissian11: If you are under 18 just say the procession of those pictures is a felony and the reward for information leading to their arrest is $2000 so they should pay you $1500 not to turn them in.
ThrowAwayTheMask1285: Sadly I am over 18, this is one of the few cases where I wish I was younger
Jameschoral: You don’t have to be under 18, just say that you are.
| 4 | 1.5 | |
1669790221 | 1669794024 | t3_z8jx6y | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: Tifu by not paying attention to we’re I was walking
[deleted]
re-tyred: We're = we are???
captain_duckys_tits: Well crap didn’t see that before I posted and I’m not sure how to correct it
| 3 | 1 | |
1669791648 | 1669844287 | t3_z8kehc | t5_2to41 | 85 | [deleted]: TIFU by having to shit behind a gas station
I just shit behind a gas station after twelve hours of driving thanks to Rowdy Energy®
so, the title is pretty self explanatory but I think I shit out the rest of what little dignity I had left there in those bushes
seriously, i had just made it through the adirondacks without hitting any of the eight deer that jumped out at me, and my normally caffeine sensitive ass thought my sugar-free energy drink that I had decided to try out wasn't working...
so I chugged all unholy 160mg of smooth caffeinated nectar down.
all was well until literally the LAST TEN MINUTES OF MY DRIVE.
my normally trusty sphincter of steel was no match for... well let's just say they don't call it ROWDY energy for nothing.
MINUTES from home my lower bowels let out the loudest alarm cry I had ever heard from them, and so my sweat glands began weeping in unison. you know you're about to be in deep shit (literally) when u get the shit sweats.
yeah. so as I sat there white-knuckling the steering wheel, I pleaded with my own asshole, but to no avail. I knew that the runs offer no gophering grace period... I had to find a toilet NOW or my cream interior was about to turn chocolate.
I gazed into each and every sparse business I passed, hoping for a sign of life that would indicate a safe shitting asylum but not a soul was out there, as if they knew just how much damage this loaded cannon would do.
left with no choice, I searched for the nearest gas station, knowing that that it may not even be open. I drove on in pure agony armed only with a fool's hope for my poor colon's wavering control.
after minutes of gritting my teeth, i reach the gas station. on the other side of the median? no problem. I pull the most breakneck U-ie I've ever done and see that the pumps are still open, and hope surges deep within my bowels.
I screech into the small, empty parking lot, not even making it into a parking spot. I get out and barely manage to grab my keys from the ignition before I SPRINT to the door, each stride weakening the mudslide floodgates.
I nearly sob as the doorhandles to my salvation failed to budge, unlike my now-leaking asshole.
I am not even thinking, just reacting to this inevitable Code Brown. I am a diarrheal animal running feral in this deserted, desolate and forsaken gas station parking lot, with just enough human sense left within me to snatch the roll of paper towel sitting miraculously on my passenger seat. As if put there by a guardian angel of shits.
that must've been who was watching over me as I made a mad dash to the dead bushes that were half lit by a floodlight in the back, and to my betrayal, the headlights of my trusty car. I had no clue who or what awaited me back there, and I heard the hum of some machine still on.
still, I persevered INTO the bushes, moving heaven, earth, and spiky twig and branch to be as out of sight as my puking asshole could let me.
I dropped trou immediately as my feet crunched layers of litter beneath them. as I regretfully let out one of the top three most egregious bowel movements of my life, I noticed a drop-off behind me and a series of sketchy-ass warehouses and buildings. I just noticed objects and more litter all around me, and for all I knew I could be shitting right on top of someone's encampment.
mind you , I have no hangups whatsoever about shitting outdoors. I'd dare say some of my best shits hav been while wilderness backpacking. but this simply could not compare to any other shitty situation I'd ever been in.
I was simultaneously sketched the fuck out and repulsed at the idea of shitting in public to begin with, and i prayed for the continued protection of my guardian angel of shits as I make a disappointingly hasty cleanup and haul ass back to my car, hopefully never to be seen again by whoever may have seen me in my most lowest of lows.
with a damning amount of sugarfree laxative that will at least leave you with enough energy to cope with the nuclear dookie fallout, that, my comrades in caca, is my honest-to-god review of Rowdy Your Bowels Energy®.
TL;DR: i shit myself ten minutes from home behind a closed gas station cause I didn't feel anything from my *sugarfree* energy drink that I needed to fuel me on my 12 hour long drive home. all this resulted in was the death of my dignity and asshole.
sampjennings: Rowdy Energy is partially sweetened with erythritol. As with most sugar alcohols, erythritol has a laxative effect when consumed in large quantities.
Don't chew too much sugar free gum, be very skeptical of drinks containing 13 grams of sugar alcohols per serving, and don't eat too many sugar free Haribo gummy bears.
glissandont: I still remember the sugar-free Haribo Amazon reviews and every time I think about them, I lose my mind; some of the funniest reviews I've ever seen.
| 3 | 28.333333 | |
1669791597 | 1669813659 | t3_z8kdlj | t5_2to41 | 36 | Trainsistor: TIFU by proposing to my girlfriend
For the record this began years ago. I had a pretty traumatic experience in highschool that left me with complex PTSD that really activates this time of year. Not an excuse but just to provide context.
So I forgot to take my meds Saturday morning. Normally that's not a big deal, but because of the time of year it effected me pretty heavily for several days. Not the actual fuck up but just more context
I've been planning to pop the question to my girlfriend for a while and had ordered some expensive jewelry online that arrived Monday. Now because I messed with my meds over the weekend I also overspent on Christmas stuff, not thinking about what I was doing
Monday arrives and I get home and open the box. The expensive jewelry is beautiful! It's a blue ammonite abalone fossil that shimmers in the light.
I was talking to my best friend/ roommate excitedly about how I wanted to propose that night, I was so excited. The three of us, my girlfriend, roommate, and I were planning to do a household movie night of my girlfriend's favorite show, and it seemed to me like the perfect time. However, something was bothering me in the back of my mind, saying "maybe give this some thought first?" So I decided I would wait until I could afford to take my girlfriend out for dinner.
Then things get a little fuzzy. I think I mentioned I would like to get take out to my roommate but sadly couldn't afford it because I had overspent. She, not realizing that I meant to buy my girlfriend a romantic meal offered several times to treat us all to food. (She's a real sweetheart and I don't deserve her, I know) eventually she and my girlfriend who joined the conversation at that point wore me down. We all wanted food.
I think I got wrapped up in the excitement and stress and my brain made a connection. I felt I had to propose because it was a nice meal and I wasn't sure when I would be able to afford something like this. It felt like it was now or never. I'm not sure why.
My girlfriend and I hop in the car and go to pick up the food. I'm so nervous, and can't really calm down and think about what's going on.
When we're walking into the restaurant, I ask her to marry me. It was a disaster. She knows I didn't want to propose like this, I'm just stressed and confused. She tried to stop me and I wished I had listened. I was out of my mind. She tells me the answer to my question is yes, but to try proposing again because this is super hurtful.
Then I realized what I was doing. I quickly apologize. She says it's fine and we go get our food.
I think she knew how bad my mental state was at that point. She thinks it's a really funny story. I'm glad she didn't just say no, but wish I could've waited just a day or two to pop the question because I think I could've saved myself some embarrassment.
But the real fuck up was in the emotions that followed. Today I've been so distracted by my own embarrassment that I actually triggered a PTSD flashback. Now I'm exhausted and not engaged and it's only Tuesday.
I won't be proposing again until at least after Christmas. My mental state will improve eventually and then I'll re consider how I want to pop the question. I hurt us both and honestly don't know why I'm telling this story on Reddit. I just needed to get it off my chest.
God I'm so embarrassed and ashamed. I really fucked up.
TL ; DR mentally ill person (me) gets confused and stressed and tries to prematurely propose in a very unromantic way. The fallout triggered a PTSD flashback
Dart_Nephilim: She sounds amazing, absolute ride or die. I hope you get to a place where you can properly propose to her soon. Best of luck to the both of you.
Trainsistor: Thank you! This is a wonderful thing to say
| 3 | 12 | |
1669801443 | 1669848947 | t3_z8nayf | t5_2to41 | 403 | NakedByNight: TIFU falling asleep while watching porn
Last night I (17m) fell asleep in my room. It was a long day. Problem was, moments before passing out, I decided to watch porn on my phone. I've managed to avoid masturbating in November. My first attempt at NNN. I had no real reason for doing it other than to see if I could. I came close to breaking my streak last night, but before I could touch my penis, I dozed off.
While asleep, I had a dream. I was soaring through the sky on a Pegasus. The dream turned into an unexpected nightmare when my hands somehow could no longer hold on to my flying horse and I plummeted towards my death. I woke up to my mom wiggling one of my toes as if she was trying to wake me up in the least disruptive manner. She said I was screaming.
At that moment, I realized my dad was in my room too. He agreed with my mom that I was screaming and even demonstrated my scream. The sound he made was something like this: "uh ha AAAAAAHHH!" I said I had a nightmare. My dad asked if my nightmare had something to do with what was on my phone. I had no idea what he was talking about until he pointed to my phone next to my pillow and I noticed it was still playing porn. Gay porn. The video was 4 hours long with another hour left to go.
I instantly switched it off and braced myself for an awkward conversation. My parents asked if I was gay and I said sometimes I like girls and sometimes I like guys. My parents looked at each other like they were trying to figure out how to respond. My dad asked if I shared this information with my gf and I said I've never shared it with anyone until that moment. My dad said if that porn video was any indication, it would seem that I like guys a whole lot, and if that was the case, then I should consider informing my gf.
My mom jumped in and asked if I was doing the things the guys in the porn video were doing. I awkwardly said no and begged my parents to please leave my room so I could get some rest. This is not how I imagined coming out to my parents. Things are weird between us now. This morning at breakfast none of us could look the other in the eye. Even when my mom dropped me at school, no words were spoken in the car. My gf also sensed that something was off, but I have no clue what to tell her.
**Tl:dr Fell asleep while watching gay porn on my phone. Had a nightmare. Screamed in my sleep. Woke up my parents, who eventually woke me up and made me aware that my phone was still playing porn. Now my family knows the truth about my sexuality and it's made things extremely awkward.**
WhiteK1t: Wiggling your toe?? 💀
NakedByNight: Son screaming in his sleep while porn is playing on his phone... mom might have thought the toe was the safest approach.
harleyspoison267: Can confirm, partner is a combat vet. Shaking people awake is the best way to get tossed and end up disrupting them a lot more. The least disruptive way you can get their attention the better because when someone is asleep, it doesn't matter who you are because their unconscious mind won't recognize you until awake and that might be too late. Mom did the right thing.
Pixieled: When I was in the Navy I (a 5'0" female) I would have to go into male berthing to wake up my watch relief pretty often. We had one guy who would wake up swinging so I would just pull back his curtain and swish a flashlight beam across his face until he woke up. Light is the safest tool for that job IME. wholly effective and provides lots of distance.
harleyspoison267: That's a good idea! A couple times things have gotten ugly or he's been hard to wake up, I've had to throw water on him... Wakes him up every time to the real world, but never in a good mood lol.
Pixieled: Lol, now I’m just imagining you squirting him with a water bottle and him running away hissing like a cat.
harleyspoison267: Hahaha that would be funny! The one time I just wet my fingertips and flicked toward his face so it was pretty minimal, another time I put a cold rag on him, but there was a time where things were more dire and I was starting to get pissed (he was moving and speaking but not really conscious) so I did actually kinda throw water from a distance and move away. He has a very aggressive face when he first wakes up just normally (baby sis stays with us sometimes and calls it his Murder Face) but he was definitely more angry than normal those times!
| 8 | 50.375 | |
1668371302 | 1668388410 | t3_yud3og | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: TIFU by breaking up with love of my life
[deleted]
SeekingAugustine: It kinda sounds like you sabotaged your relationship. You should probably talk to a therapist to figure out any underlying issues you have. Otherwise you will keep doing it in other relationships
Alarmed-Reserve5512: yep thats what i’m concerned about. i’m pretty shocked that how easily i can (get bored? idk) that kept me from having another serious relationship and i don’t think i’ll consider one until i’m certain that i’ve fixed that issue. and thanks for optimistic/positive comment. i’m aware that, that post might’ve take tons of negative comments. so thank you for that and for the advice too
SeekingAugustine: Was it boredom or restlessness? Maybe the comfort is what freaked you out.
Still, find someone to talk to about it
OnlyNefariousness157: idk maybe both, i felt like i was trapped but i knew she was one of the best things on my life -i was not in a bright spot while all that was happening- i don't think it was boredom it's something else
| 5 | 2.6 | |
1668697615 | 1668703240 | t3_yxsmwg | t5_2to41 | 24 | MeatBicycle4two: TIFU By trying to shock a scammer/catfish
Right, so I received a wrong number text. I tried my best to catch them in their scam. This involved baiting questions and trying to be a little polite. Their English went from some of the most grammatically correct English, to absolute nonsense, to typing in Japanese. To make a long story short through my deduction I felt I should try to shock the scammers into never trying to contact me again. I used to stock photos on Google to try and placate their questions, but I got sick of it and just decided to up the shock value found a picture of a penis with syphilis and sent that. Then promptly deleted the text and block the number. I kept my girlfriend in the loop let her know what was going on while she was at a friend's house but I think she's angry at me after the fact.
TL;DR Sent a syph dick pic to a suspected scammer and made my girlfriend upset.
EDIT: Found out why she was upset. She was cheating on me. Trying to hide it by being overly mad.
Devittraisedto2: Why would she be mad at you because you sent a scammer a dick pic that isn't yours
MeatBicycle4two: It's almost certainly because I deleted the evidence
TheScruffyStacheGuy: Why does that make it worse? Did she want to see the syph dick?
| 4 | 6 | |
1669813567 | 1669867560 | t3_z8r0wt | t5_2to41 | 140 | JrtheFool: TIFU by leaving my weed in my bag at therapy.
My parents force me to go to group therapy every day 4 days a week. It is very invasive and takes up most of my time only giving me 3 hours of Freetime a day. I decided to buy some weed to treat myself because I haven't had nice things lately, you can imagine how pissed I was when I opened my bag and my weed was gone. I showed a person I thought was my friend the bag of goodies I brought hours before it was stolen and she was the only person I had told. We have to put our bags in another room when we do therapy so anyone can go through our stuff. When I tell you I was shocked to find out the weed I worked so hard for was now gone, I was pissed. I asked my plug if I could buy more today and his not answered his phone. I am going to confront my "friend" today and hopefully get revenge in some way idk.
TL;DR I got my weed stolen from me by a fake friend a group therapy. You cant trust anyone.
Reznerk: If you're a teen in therapy you really shouldn't be using weed as a coping mechanism. This is coming from someone who smoked for most of his teen years, find better ways to reduce stress. It will emotionally stunt you and is all around a bad decision.
shakana44: nothing wrong with smoking weed for stress, anxiety and depression. sometimes it helps more than medications that have horrible side effects.
Reznerk: It [inhibits](https://www.pnas.org/doi/10.1073/pnas.1920325116#:~:text=He's%20found%20that%20exposure%20to,when%20the%20animals%20are%20adults.) frontal cortex development and is widely viewed as a poor choice for people who's brains are still developing.
Edit: also I'd wager that using Marijuana for anxiety or depression has the potential to be irresponsible. Those were the same talking points I used, and frankly I don't agree with the sentiment that it's anything more than an excuse for continuing to self medicate. I've taken SSRIs, Anxiety meds, and smoked weed. Finding the right SSRI was far more effective for my depression, using prescribed lorazepam for the few panic attacks I've experienced was way more effective, and I didn't have a habit that I felt I needed to do regularly to feel balanced. Weed can totally be helpful for stress release and IMO, is less harmful than alcohol but most of the medicinal effects come from CBD which isn't the primary compound in almost all of the weed you'd buy. I don't agree that Marijuana is the miracle drug that cures common cold style mental illness that most of us experience, for me it was a crutch I clung onto for a while. These days I smoke rarely, I don't need any prescribed meds, and I don't experience debilitating depression or anxiety. It took a few years of therapy and introspection to get here, but when I look back weed was frankly something that held me back more than it helped me personally.
shakana44: everyone is different. meds help some people but not all. I've tried countless meds and nothing helps me. marijuana is what helps me. you found what works for you, that's awesome. I'll stick with what works for ne
Reznerk: Generally speaking your goal should be to develop coping mechanisms that don't involve substances. I'm not knocking people who use it but I stopped reccomending it as a healthy option for people to treat depression and anxiety, but I'd never tell a teen that it's okay.
Attempt101: I’m not asking to be smart, but what about people who are prescribed meds? Do you think that’s an issue?
My personal opinion is that meds are over prescribed and overly abused, HOWEVER, there are some people or situations where the benefits of using medications outweigh the risks. I, personally, think it’s the same with weed—despite me not smoking at all. I mean, there is medicinal marijuana so it’s technically a medication too….
Idc if I get downvoted to no end—-just curious what your stance is…
shehas649: When I was put on SSRI’s, they told me that they’re meant to be used temporarily. Only long enough for a person to develop healthier coping mechanisms. Some stay on them longer than others, but the goal is to eventually be able to function without them.
Attempt101: I’ve heard the same…that SSRIs can actually be some of the harshest things to come off of….just going through the Reddit wormhole alone has some vicious stories…I’m def scared of being dependent on any medication at all….
| 9 | 15.555556 | |
1668377381 | 1668390573 | t3_yug4h6 | t5_2to41 | 2,293 | Commercial_Low1383: TIFU by expecting my family to pay for my birthday dinner update
[removed]
MegaRadCool8: Don't assume you're overstaying your welcome if your friend's dad says you aren't; there are more people that want to help than people that don't in the world. But do ask your friend to be honest with you about the topic.
Sorry you're having to deal with this BS. I hope all future birthdays are so wonderful that they make up for this one.
BigHawkSports: Hijacking top comment to say - if you've been made to feel like a burden your whole life it can be difficult to accept genuine, well meaning help. Take people's words at face value and try not to "interpret" too much.
1_disasta: Maybe a conversation with friends dad to explain those feelings so he can try to help positively reinforce that she isnt being a burden. I know with some of the issues I have hearing it be echoed helps a little bit to fight of the negative thoughts.
BillFox86: Find ways to meaningfully contribute there. It’s easier to not be a burden if you can be considered a blessing.
Hoosier2016: 100%. I have taken in friends who needed some help but ultimately had to ask them to leave after a few months because they wouldn’t pay rent or help around the house when given either as an option. Eventually cleaning up after them felt like I was a maid service at a hotel for them and it made me resent them rather than want to keep helping.
cherenkov_light: This. This is the worst feeling. Knowing that they’re relying on you, but doing little (if any)things to help you maintain your home.
Like I get that you don’t have money to give, but you have time. Do the fucking dishes you dirtied.
| 7 | 327.571429 | |
1668380602 | 1668380925 | t3_yuhpnu | t5_2to41 | 15 | badguyrude: TIFU by wearing my hoodie at night
I was walking around last night in a hoodie because it was really cold last night. I was walking on the same sidewalk as this white straight couple. Once the guy saw me he stopped and held his girlfriend. He just kept looking at me as I was walking by. Once I walked by he said “ok let’s go.” They sounded a little tipsy but I’m not sure. Anyways, I can’t tell if they were being prejudiced or if they were being worried about something else. I just felt like something was weird about that interaction.
There isn’t anything else to this interaction but I just felt like I should post this. I don’t know if I got the wrong idea about what happened or what but it just made me feel bad. They weren’t an older couple either they looked like they were in their early twenties. I feel like I was some kind of creep or something just for having a hoodie on.
Tl;Dr I wore my hoodie at night and now people thought I was a creep
gzlovesyou: U made a reddit account just to post this?
SeizeThemMemes: In five different subs.
| 3 | 5 | |
1668612847 | 1668641578 | t3_ywwm01 | t5_2to41 | 4,979 | NazgulNumberNine: TIFU when I encouraged my roommate's dad to follow me to his son's room
Yesterday my roommate's dad decided to show up at our apartment unannounced. I answered the door and invited the dad to come inside. I was high as fuck at the time, but I did the same shit I always do when I'm pretending not to be high - I would repeatedly stop my eyes from closing at the last minute before blinking. I have no idea why I do that or how it even became a thing, but I imagine I just end up looking like I'm struggling not to fall asleep instead of looking less high. The dad could tell I was stoned and I could tell that he could tell, so to avoid prolonged eye contact, I literally turned my back towards the dad and encouraged him to follow me to his son's room.
The dad said he was willing to wait in the living room until his son was ready to see him, but I insisted that we go to the source. It was the weed talking. As we approached my roommate's room, it was obvious from the noises that he was having sex. I was aware that my roommate was having sex long before his dad showed up, but somehow I forgot to remember that until it was too late. The dad and I heard my roommate calling his gf a slut more than once, which prompted the dad to knock on the door and make his presence known with a pissed off tone in his voice. That was my cue to walk the fuck away. Even though I didn't stay to watch the fireworks, I heard the dad yell at my roommate for being disrespectful and degrading towards his gf and threatening to tell his mom.
When the dad was done speaking his mind and stormed out, my roommate and his gf had nothing good to say to me and I did not blame them. Because of me, my roommate is now gonna get regular visits from his parents every week.
TL:DR Convinced my roommate's dad to follow me to his son's room while I was high and the son was having sex. No happy ending for anyone.
Tautochrone1: Is your roommate not an adult?
Lcdent2010: The question should be, is your roommates dad paying for him to live. If he is then your roommates dad is going to want some control on what his kid does with his money. If I was supporting my son while he got a job and started his life I would not be happy and would cut him off if he was getting high and screwing his girlfriend. My son can do whatever he wants if he is taking care of himself. If not I am not going to finance self destructive behavior.
easyusername15: How is his son having sex with his girlfriend in privacy self destructive behavior?
Lcdent2010: It might not be, if they are using protection, but I am not going to finance a kid so that he can get high and have sex. He is 19, he needs to be figuring out his life not fucking around. I don’t mind him having fun, if he is diligent in his school work, or learning a skill, learning his job, or doing something useful. only getting high and screwing his girlfriend, Money immediately stops flowing. Not really sorry about it. I want my son to win in life in whatever he does. Having a drug addiction and a pregnant girlfriend at 19 is not winning. Sorry/not sorry.
SchwiftyTownshin: How...exactly did you infer all of this from what you just read in this post? Are we reading the same story? You have absolutely zero idea if this kid is in school and/or currently working...shit it didn't even state that the roommate was high, for all you know he may not smoke at all. The leaps in the assumptions you took here are Olympic caliber.
This is what happens when people don't take the time to fully read and comprehend what they are reading and then project their own morality on a situation they know fuck all about.
reevelainen: _Self-destructive behauvior_ is like a text book example of anti-weed propaganda lol.
Steed1000: Dude. Getting high, ruining relationships, and contributing to the lowering of quality of life is pretty self destructive behavior. Smoking weed on its own isn't, I do it regularly, but I own a home and have a job and I don't let it get in the way. Just because a term shows up in anti-weed propaganda doesn't mean it isn't a legitimate term for a legitimate thing that happens when people *abuse* drugs. Abuse is different than use, and if you are using it for the purpose of going to another planet and make shitty life decisions then maybe you should chill tf out until you can handle your shit.
reevelainen: And that is related how to OP or his roommate's life how? Don't know if it's you or whether this discussion is about something else, someone went to the deep end pretty fast. _This escalated quickly_ as they say.
The self destructive behauviour can be fine as an expression but making such conclusions about these two individual's lifes is pretty propaganda like tbh.
Atleast he's getting laid and typically drug centered no-life oriented whatever people you or someone Else might mean (you know, those practising self destructive behauviour) are not. I think.
Steed1000: Would you say damaging the relationship with the person you live with improves your quality of life?
If you don't think it is an improvement, then it probably lowers the quality of life.
Do you think it lowers the quality of your life to constantly have your parents not trust you and hover around you and in general not trust you? Do you think it is an improvement?
It isn't defined as "self destructive behavior" because of *what* the activity is, it is labeled as such because of the *result*. Drinking alcohol isn't self destructive behavior. But drinking enough that it begins to...destroy...one's self.... is self destructive behavior.
If you smoke weed and it improves your situation, that isn't self destructive.
In this case a few things were damaged. Relationships and trust between parents, friends, potentially girlfriend, all that. This person's life was not improved because dude was smoking weed that day. It literally lead to bad things happening. When you do something enough that bad things start to happen as a result, you should start examining your life choices.
If this person got high and drove their car into a ditch would that be self destructive behavior? No? Only when you are drunk? Cmon.
&#x200B;
>Atleast he's getting laid and typically drug centered no-life oriented whatever people you or someone Else might mean (you know, those practising self destructive behauviour) are not. I think.
This is literally how a child thinks and is fuckin laughable. "Hey bro at least he is getting laid!". If you think people getting high and overloading their pleasure centers *aren't* also fucking then you are a fool. You probably aren't around enough sex or drugs to understand that honestly.
voltage_drop: Dude could literally have a fantastic life and smoke weed from time to time while having a shaming kink that's consensual.
Steed1000: Based on the sub I would guess that the weed in this situation didn’t help. I mean he literally said that he fucked up by getting and being too high. I get it dude, I smoke weed too, doesn’t mean that weed is perfect or incapable of interfering with your life negatively.
Would you encourage him to keep getting high and making decisions that yield similar results? If not, why? Because it would be self destructive right? I mean the evidence is in the post OP themselves made….
And you seem to think I am talking about the roommate. Nah. He might have those things you mentioned, but his buddy’s decision to be a stoned idiot and act like a stoned idiot put a strain on his relationship with his father. His kinks and shit have nothing to do with the fact that his roommate got so fucking high that he couldn’t function like a normal adult that doesn’t damage relationships. It’s not that hard to observe.
voltage_drop: To little information given, I've spent plenty time high and done stupid things in life and seem to be doing fine. You can be a weekend stoner and still function
Steed1000: No one is arguing that you can’t do that buddy. Nobody at all. You are missing the point entirely.
Do you think OP will be doing what he did again? No? Why not? Smoking weed isn’t self destructive kid, but getting so fucking high that you start screwing up relationships in your life is. Anything done to that point is self destructive behavior. Are you beginning to understand my point?
Put the weed down man, can’t believe I had to explain that to you. Again.
And too little info given? Dude wrote out the whole story and gave every detail
And admitted it was something he did where he “fucked up”. What more information do you need dude?
These are the things people bring up in interventions. “Hey man, I love you, but you are smoking too much. You get way too high and you fuck up relationships and you really put a strain on my relationship with my dad. I think you should probably slow down”.
But this is the internet and half of you are probably literal children still figuring stuff out. So. Whatever.
voltage_drop: You just seem to be abit uptight.
Nowhere does it say he smokes to often, your assuming it's a constant occurance.
Father dropped in unannounced on ops potentially day off, being high isn't the issue in that scenario, and I'd argue the fathers reaction is the destructive part of this whole situation.
You can have a 1 day fuck up and it's not suddenly self destructive behavior lol.
Steed1000: Hahahahahahaha did you really just say that?
That you could do something that destroys ones self, but because it only happened once it isn’t self destructive behavior?? Hahahahahaha
Hey man, if I jump into traffic once is that self destructive behavior?
If I play with a gun like it is a toy and fuck up and shoot it and hurt somebody or get myself arrested is that self destructive behavior?
If I smoke weed once, piss off my parents, and get sent to boarding school, is it self destructive behavior?
If I go buy cocaine once and get caught with it and arrested is it self destructive behavior?
It’s isn’t the action. It is the result of the action. The results of these actions were bad. It is self destructive.
Hahahahahahaha
Your parents and teachers failed you my friend.
MrPhistr69: You’re a weird guy
Steed1000: Ok
| 18 | 276.611111 | |
1668421137 | 1668460914 | t3_yuv000 | t5_2to41 | 27 | SunnyBunny1209: TIFU by trying to unclog a toilet and flooding my bathroom
First, a little bit of backstory. I (19M) still live at home with my parents, but I am not a jobless neckbeard. I pay rent and help out around the house, and it's just more convenient to live at home since I go to community college nearby. My mom is the one who had the unfortunate task of dealing with my incompetence (we'll call her Moses.)
I have a poopy butthole. When I poop, I wipe a lot, for fear of poopy butthole. No one wants to be the guy with dingleberries and a skid mark, and neither do I. Due to this fear, I tend to use a significant amount of toilet paper whenever I poop. This ungodly addiction to toilet paper leads me to clog the toilet semi-regularly. Usually the clog is already down the toilet, so water backs up in the bowl and I just go ham with a plunger for a few minutes, simple as that.
When I woke up this afternoon (I have a really bad sleep schedule), I opened the toilet and was greeted with what I'd imagine the aftermath of a pipe bomb to look like. (This might break the vulgar rule in the subreddit, sorry.) The poop had not gone down the pipes, but had backed up back into the bowl, leaving an oscar worthy impression of a cartoon explosion effect. This was an unwelcome surprise, so I did what I always do, which is to close the toilet again, flush, and hope the water pressure unclogs the toilet (which works a solid 50% of the time, with the ol plungie making up the other half.) I went about my day until I had to poop, and went back to check on my lovecraftian horror. To my dismay, it was unfazed by my assasination attempt, and challenged me to a duel. I naively tried flushing one more time before deciding it was time to take on the solid brown ocean in front of me. I suited up in my armor of gloves and an N95, grabbed the plunger, and engaged in honorable combat.
After about 20-30 minutes fighting to the death, plunging as hard as I could without sloshing poop water out of the bowl, the water, while still poopy, had lowered back to normal toilet levels. Sensing its hasty retreat, I decided to finish off my opponent with a flush, and to my horror, the enemy was reinforced and began reclaiming land at Ukrainian speeds. Still needing to poop, I closed the lid with the intention of waiting for the water to lower again before continuing my war, and pooped in another bathroom. This was around 11 at night, so I was going to go to bed. I finished my poop, and prepared to go shower.
While walking over to shower, I heard the sound of water spilling. I refused to believe it for a couple seconds, then accepted the terrifying reality that poop water was coming out of my toilet and onto the floor. (I'm not a toilet expert, so I didn't know what was happening, but apparently it was because I hadn't turned the water to the toilet off or something?) I turned on the light and saw the worst possible scenario. A thin layer of poop water, maybe a few centimeters, had already pooled up and filled THE ENTIRETY of my small, approximately 144 square foot bathroom (2.5 bathroom house.) So much water had spilled out that it had escaped the bathroom, ran along the side of the wall, and spilled into MY MOM'S ROOM. Flanked by the enemy and backed into a corner, I called for my mom, since I had no fucking clue what to do.
When my mom came over to see what was wrong, she was PISSED. I've never been a homeowner or apartment leaser, so the severity of water damage was not completely understood by me. I had already ran off to grab a mop, but she persistently yelled at me to grab towels. Seeing as the only towels that needed to be washed were my two favorite towels, (red on one side, brown on the other, so I know which side to dry my hair with and which side to dry my ass with,) I was reluctant to grab her some towels, which made her even more mad. My natural reaction of coping with stress is to laugh, so while my mom was in a rage induced panic, I BUST out laughing, which angers her EVEN MORE. My mom then opened the toilet since it was spilling, saw the poo lagoon, and FLIPPED HER SHIT! Then she followed the crime scene into HER ROOM and FLIPPED HER SHIT AGAIN! (Understandably.) She then showed me how to turn off the water from the tube/pipe under the toilet (learned something new today.) I don't think she's ever been as mad as she was tonight. Her increase in anger led to a proportional increase in my towel generosity, so I accepted the fact that I'd have to buy new towels. While she (Moses) parted the brown sea, I soaked up the stream that had ran into her room. In the moment, It really struck me how severely water damages wood, since the wood soaks up water n whatnot. (We also have hardwood floors, so that doesn't really help, although i'd rather have water damaged hardwood instead of shit soaked carpet.) The sides of our walls were slightly peeled up, and some of the wood was showing as the painted washed off? Then the severity of the situation set in, which led me to laugh even harder, since I was stressed. THEN, the hilarity of the situation set in as well since we were cleaning up a shit stream and I was half naked, only covered in a towel since I was planning on showering. After drying everything while while hysterically laughing as my mom screamed at me, I started drying the walls with a blowdryer while my mom started wiping everything down. Then we started cloroxing the shit out of everything, and that ended my 2 or so hours of fighting to the death. First against my own creation, then defending against the unrelenting assualts of my mom yelling. The funny this is that I couldn't clear the pipes after around half an hour of plunging, but my mom stepped straight into poop water and successfully plunged the toilet in about half a minute. I will be training my plunging technique in the future, as well as considering investing in a bidet. (Which is kinda poetic in a way, as poop water convinced me to get a deviced that creates poop water. )
TLDR: clogged my toilet, unsuccessfully attempted to unclog, took a breather, came back to poop water filling my bathroom, had an unwelcome bonding session with my mom and water damaged our house :'^)
sg12412: Dude, if you're gonna use a whole roll every time you shit, start throwing it in the garbage and take the bag out every time. Better yet get some wet wipes. Try Dude Wipes, they're good, they smell good, pretty tough for handling the jungle down there, and then toss em in the trash. They're supposedly flushable but with the way you wipe I wouldn't risk it.
Side note, I used to be like you, but I would wipe until my ass bled. You don't need massive amounts of toilet paper to get clean, you just need to do it right, and after use a wet wipe.
fomoco94: Save yourself some money. Dude wipes are overpriced, just buy the store brand.
| 3 | 9 | |
1668381895 | 1668388632 | t3_yuiaok | t5_2to41 | 130 | yuliwen: TIFU by crashing a car wash
Today I took my partner’s car to run errands and wanted to get it cleaned as I was heading back. In the car wash, the steering wheel leaned a bit towards the left a few times and my left side mirror was pushed forward by the spinning brushes. A little scared that I was left too much and turned the steering wheel to the right and not thinking there are rails that help guide the car. This resulted in the car popping out of the railing and into one of the machines. There is a huge dent on the passenger side lights and bumper from it. The employees helped me out of the car wash and finished my wash without pressing charges luckily. I feel so stupid and so sorry…. Angry at myself that my partner was perfectly fine and just asked me to look into seeing how much it'll cost to fix.
TL;DR: Turned the steering wheel inside a car wash and popped the car out of the railing causing a huge dent in the front bumper.
Fuhgly: It's ok. Things like this happen. At least your partner is understanding. Hope your day gets better, friend.
cdn_tony: I was a car wash manager years ago. This happens once or twice a year in a busy car wash. We used bags of salt as a ramp to get the car back in the track.
| 3 | 43.333333 | |
1669819639 | 1669901078 | t3_z8tbxd | t5_2to41 | 3,765 | jackredditlol: TIFU by completely misunderstanding the Secret Santa game at work and making a complete fool out of myself
A bit of context.
I'm working in Europe and I was raised in an Arabic country so Christmas and everything else that comes with it is a completely foreign concept to me. My colleagues are awesome and I'm really enjoying working with them in the company. The only downside is that when they're extremely tired, their English tends to make less and less sense.
We are a small team of 5 and my manager brought it up to me that she wants to do this thing where we will make a "game" and choose a "name" then give that chosen name a gift. I remember I double checked if I understood correctly. I said oh so the whole team is going to buy a gift to that person? Being this conversation took place on a late Friday afternoon and her being tired, she said yeah sure. I found the concept weird. But I thought maybe it's a cultural thing so I said yeah sure I'm in.
We didn't really talk about it since. Today at work they said that they're going to finally play the game to find out who they're going to gift presents. I was like cool. We're gonna find out who's that lucky bastard getting the expensive gift. They also said secret Santa. I thought wow what a creative unbefitting name for such a game.
So my manager brought a paper bag and the names were inside written on small pieces of paper. She asked us one by one to take out one name each. I thought since we're 5, for every name there are 5 pieces of paper and the name that's picked the most will be nominated as the chosen secret Santa or whatever the fuck. I was rationalising how this is going to end up with one chosen individual to get the ultimate gift.
One girl said she'll go first and was excited. I was like wtf. Why does it matter. Weird but sure. This is my inner dialogue btw.
We all picked and then it was my turn. They're hiding the papers and reading them in secret. And I'm thinking what's with all the secrecy.
I was the one before the last. I put my hand in the bag and only notice 2 papers are left. Another wtf moment. I say nothing and pick up one of them. It's Celine. My favourite colleague. She deserves it I thought.
My manager picks up the last one and I thought it was time to vote. I get excited and wait for her to give us the mark.
Instead, she asks us to put back the papers in the paper bag and to not forget who we picked. I thought why not just put the papers on the table and see who got voted most. But whatever. At this point I started feeling that I think I misunderstood the whole thing.
We put the papers back and then I ask, "So who did you guys pick? I got Celine".
They collectively looked at me and said, "Noo! But what's the point of the whole secret Santa thing if we're gonna tell? Now we have to do it again"
I tell them we're choosing one to give a gift to right? And now we're voting? And they all look so confused and basically say... Uhh... What?
And then my dumbass finally gets it. The realisation hit like a truck. It all clicked. I go like "Wait, so the person I got in my paper is a person I'm gifting and someone else got my name so they'll gift me?"
"...yes?"
I said, "Oh, now I get it". And they all started laughing.
I feel like I have 2 brain cells left.
TL;DR: after a series of wtf moments with my colleagues, I finally get what Secret Santa is about but I had to ruin it the first time we picked up the names first.
Edit: while we're on the topic, how expensive/luxurious should I go with the gifts? And since it's secret, I'm gonna assume I shouldn't tell the person I picked that I left them the gift? So I just leave it on her desk?
Oh yeah, btw I got Celine again 🤩🤩🤩 we work closely together and the support on all fronts from her is immense. She deserves this and much more.
I was thinking about buying these Santa Claus socks? But they're really cheap, but they look so cool lol idk man help!
Edit 2: a few facts about Celine: loved coffee and loves cooking, honestly she makes some really good food and once she made some baked stuff... It was out of this world. Soon she's gonna start learning a language, she likes reading, and she likes biking and overall a really cool dude to be around.
Edit 3: I asked my manager what the budget is, and she said there's no limit, and I shouldn't be ashamed if I got something significantly more expensive than other people. So I'm going all out on this one, boys. We're also exchanging the gifts on a specific day we planned to have a little gathering.
I'm definitely getting her something coffee-related, a thermo mug with special beans from a special coffee shop + Santa Claus socks and some chocolate here and there.
Justinformation: You just made this years Secret Santa even more memorable :)
Candymanshook: Seriously, they are going to be talking about that endearing guy from the Middle East who didn’t get secret Santa every year around this time
jackredditlol: I'm not from the middle east 😂
Candymanshook: Right when you said Arab country I just assumed so
jackredditlol: Wrong of you to do that
Candymanshook: Maybe be a bit more detailed in your post if you don’t want people making innocent assumptions.
EverydayNovelty: Don't get so bend out of shape for being told you made an incorrect assumption.
Candymanshook: You are clearly the one who is bent out of shape, I know that I’m correct as in the west Arab countries= Middle East. Clearly it’s not just Christmas you need to learn about pal
EverydayNovelty: I'm Canadian. Maybe you really should work on not being so bent out of shape for being incorrect?
Candymanshook: You aren’t OP 😂
Buddy I literally do not care
EverydayNovelty: *cares so little he just has to reapond*
Candymanshook: I’ll take a note to not respond to your next comment since you are so triggered by me replying to your reply to my comment.
| 13 | 289.615385 | |
1669820660 | 1669898115 | t3_z8tr0v | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU by opening a joint account
[deleted]
ValElTech: What is a sahp? For me it's a Solar Assisted Heat Pump ....
Frosty_Weather_3899: Stay at home parent
| 3 | 6.666667 | |
1669821005 | 1669859497 | t3_z8tw8l | t5_2to41 | 56,053 | PresidentWeevil: TIFU by purchasing an expensive coffee machine and making a terrible discovery
I drink a lot of coffee. My mornings consist of two 300ml mugs of coffee, and I sometimes have a third after dinner later in the day.
Recently, I got far too into James Hoffmann's videos and decided to upgrade my shitty drip coffee machine for a proper precision brewer. And when I say precision, I mean that this thing comes with a water testing strip so you can calibrate the machine for the mineral content in your water supply. Serious nerd shit.
To justify the ludicrous amount of money I spent on what appears to be the Hadron Collider of coffee machines, I did some research on brewing ratios in order to maximise the allegedly life-changing potential of this equipment. Now, coffee science says the ideal water-to-beans ratio for this brew method is about 60g of grounds per litre of water. Out of interest, I decided to prepare my usual ratio from the old machine and see how close I was. It turns out, since I got the old machine just over a year ago, I've been brewing at about 20g/litre, resulting in what I now realise is pathetically weak brew.
I prepared a proper 60g/L brew with the new machine, and the resulting coffee was on another planet. The flavours were so developed it was like I could taste the touch of the Colombian farmer who picked the beans. I drank my full morning dose of two 300ml mugs in just over an hour.
And then, I discovered an unexpected side effect.
The year of drinking weak-ass brew has conditioned my body for weak coffee. And I had just drunk over half a litre of coffee that was theoretically three times as strong as usual.
It has now been an hour since I finished that first pot and I can hear the passage of time. A fly flew past me in slow motion. I made an omelette for lunch and I beat the egg so fast it turned into steam. My heart no longer beats; it vibrates. And there is something unholy brewing in my lower intestine and I am fearing the wrath of God when it is released. Send help.
TL;DR: My new coffee machine gave me the knowledge that I've been conditioning my body to piss-weak brew for a year, and two cups of the real strong stuff made me transcend the space-time continuum.
EDIT:
[Here](https://www.sageappliances.com/uk/en/products/coffee/bdc450.html) is the machine I bought, for those who have asked, although it appears to be sold out at the moment. Did I get the last one?
And [here](https://youtu.be/HfkdkZRv6Mc) is the James Hoffmann review that convinced me to ruin my life in this particular way.
EDIT 2:
To everyone accusing this of being some kind of viral ad, it's true. Sage paid me, and in fact specifically requested I include the details of me plastering the inside of my toilet bowl following the intestinal catastrophe their product gave me. Aggressive shitting is exactly the kind of PR exposure they want for their brand.
Cant_think__of_one: One time I was out of coffee at home, and decided to brew a pot using instant coffee instead of regular grounds.
Don’t ever do that.
HowsTheBeef: Wait why cus it's gross or what? Too much caffiene?
OutAndABoot: It'd be fine if they used the proper ratio. I bet they just used the same volume of instant coffee as they do with normal grounds.
some_clickhead: Also there is no need to brew using instant coffee, it dissolves in water.
CLE-Mosh: Used to eat a straight spoon full when I was hungover and late for work...
je_kay24: I feel like this is a good time to mention that a person can overdose on caffeine so be careful dry scooping
ares395: It's pretty hard though, unless you take 50+ cups a day you should be fine. You'll shit yourself among other things beforehand though
Edit: Wikipedia states that a lethal dose is around 75-100 cups
je_kay24: With dry scooping it is much easier to get to dangerous levels of caffeine since it’s more concentrated
Here’s a great video that details the dangers of excessive caffeine: https://youtu.be/sylqJ0NEVJw
Now instant coffee may not be nearly as potent as in this video, but 400 mg is recommended max amount of caffeine and around 1200 mg side effects can begin to get dangerous
itzjmad: >400 mg is recommended max amount of caffeine
*looks at 300mg can of energy drink that I've definitely had 3 in a day before*
I'm in danger
absinthangler: I once washed dishes by Vibrating because the chef had to leave to avoid 40 hours and I had brought 6 of the huge red bull cans.
And I consumed 4 of them during my shift.
I ended up working around 20 hours to clean up after a banquet, finishing the prep and running the banquet as the only cook and dishwasher.
Top it off, after I had finished all the dishes and cleaned the machine the lead server wheeled in a cart of crusty cake plates after promising me that all the dishes were in.
Take down and fill up for that machine was like an hour each.
itzjmad: How'd you know it was food service 🤣
absinthangler: There are certain tells.
Like drinking dangerous amounts of caffeine.
TrinititeTears: I would just buy adderall or cocaine at that point.
absinthangler: I was making $8.35/hr and less than 40 hours a week.
Couldn't afford that shit.
TrinititeTears: Yeah, my local drug dealer is my doctor, so my insurance covers it.
| 16 | 3,503.3125 | |
1669822105 | 1669905331 | t3_z8ucq9 | t5_2to41 | 24 | Lovethecreeper: TIFU by letting my S/O get me some gifts on Amazon.
Me (20F) and my girlfriend (21F) have been in a relationship for a little over a year now. Because of that and the current proximity to Christmas, my girlfriend decided to get me a some (combo Christmas/anniversary) gifts that were on my Amazon wishlist taking advantage of the Black Friday deals that were available. She and I thought it would be cute to send me some, well *very personal* gift messages.
I was a bit afraid to let my mother know of the relationship, I guess it’s a somewhat irrational fear that stems from my childhood when my mother would snoop around at everything I did during those early years.
While playing Minecraft, my sister comes up to my room and said “You’ve got a package from \[girlfriend’s name\]” and I was a bit dumbfounded, some of the gifts had arrived two days earlier than Amazon predicted.
The package included new panties, garter belts, a webcam, and some mineral oil, which are seen on each of the gift messages. Considering the nature of the gifts, the messages were very intimate and slightly lewd in nature, something only meant for mine and my girlfriend’s eyes to see. When the package came in, 3 out of 4 of the gift messages were sticking out a bit, and my mother pulled them out and read each of the messages according to my sister’s description.
I couldn’t have known what her reaction to reading them at the time was, although she did give me a little tease about the panties earlier. Now she almost certainly knows I have a partner considering the nature of the messages before I was ready to tell her.
There’s at least 3 more packages coming to my knowledge between now and December 13th and they also have intimate gift messages, so she’ll inevitably read more intimate messages assuming she hasn’t learned her lesson.
TL;DR: My partner decided to give me some gifts on Amazon and sent some intimate gift messages, which my mother found and read when the package came in.
drucieJ: You're a grown ass woman. Who cares if your mom knows about your girl.
soundguynick: Read a little closer. (OP is not a man.)
Also, they're a grown woman. They get to decide when and how people know things about their private life.
drucieJ: Shit...your right.....still....
Mode-Klutzy: If your mother(well any mother/parents) love you, they will support you. Regardless. In agreement with many others, you’re an adult. If people (no matter who they are) can not respect you for you and who you are, forget them. (Candy coated response!)
Side question/rant. Is it just me or as time goes on, anything social as a whole is digressing. Like, sensitivity is skyrocketing and you can’t hardly talk about shit anymore without someone cowering in a digital corner upon the sight of a word being remotely “intimate”?!
| 5 | 4.8 | |
1668389118 | 1668451440 | t3_yul0d8 | t5_2to41 | 20 | madfickle_: TIFU by using a insecticide surface spray on my house
It’s spring in Australia, I live in a rural city so I get a lot of bugs and spiders. I bought my first home in July, and the outside is covered in spiderwebs. My dad suggested I use a surface spray for long-term prevention. So I did, and within about 10 minutes I identified:
- Several black and brown house spiders
- Several red back spiders,
- Several white tailed spiders
- Several daddy long legs spiders
- Several earwigs
- One funnel web
I assumed that the surface spray would also kill anything it hit like normal bug spray, but apparently it just repels them, bringing them inside.
I’m currently sitting at my back door spraying the spiders as they literally attempt to take refuge inside my home. I’ve killed about 20 spiders in the last 20 minutes.
I’m never going to relax again. There was a HUGE red back spider on my window just now. All my windows and external doors have spiders now.
If I don’t die from a spider bite, I’m going to die from bug spray fumes.
TL;DR: I used a surface spray to prevent spiders, but it’s actually just made the problem seemingly worse.
Squigglepig52: Fucking earwigs.
madfickle_: i was more concerned about the spiders that are lethal without treatment but ok
Squigglepig52: I mean, yeah, that's reasonable, but for me, earwigs trump spiders.
| 4 | 5 | |
1668389973 | 1668410307 | t3_yulb45 | t5_2to41 | 18 | cumvilenecklace: TIFU by wearing a cum filled necklace to bed.
TIFU this morning i (F 18) woke up by a loud popping noise, i look around and i smell something that smells like rotten eggs or even mouldy cheese. im looking around for the source of the noise. i then feel something wet on my bed and do what everyone else would do smell it.
i have a heart shaped vile necklace filled with my boyfriends children. and the lid had popped off and it was genuinely very bad
i GAGGED it was awful.
i cannot begin to explain how awful it was and i had had it for less than a week. it was truly the worst smell i have smelt ever.
how you may be asking yourself who do they have a cum filled necklace. long story short im just a borderline weirdo.
i took half my bed to the laundry to be cleaned. and thank God i have a male cat (not dessexed) so i could play it off as cat pee.
now i don't think i have ever had such a terrible start to a morning.
life is short. don't wear cum necklaces to bed
TL;DR.
Downtown_Report1646: How’d you get it
cumvilenecklace: he nutted into a container and i used an eyedropper to put in into the necklace..
Downtown_Report1646: Who did?
AcrobaticSource3: What do you mean “who did”? The only other character in this story was the *male cat* and that would somehow make this story even more disturbing
Downtown_Report1646: What’s the glove next to your name?
Master_Maniac: It's for the cat
| 7 | 2.571429 | |
1669828352 | 1669829371 | t3_z8wza8 | t5_2to41 | 25 | Chronicmatt: TIFU by sleeping on a decomposing rodent.
So I just read a TIFU here that made me remember this horrible TIFU from my youth. When I was in tenth grade I went to my first concert ever. Long story short it was a ton of fun and I spent the night in the first row gripping the handrail watching the band play. This occurred on a school night and I didn’t get home until the wee hours of the morning. When I finally got to my room beyond exhaustion I smelled a horrible stench, being a 15 year old boy I assumed I was the cause of said smell and decided I would take care of it in the morning. When I woke up for school the smell was even worse, and it definitely wasn’t coming from my pits. I turned over my entire room looking for the source. I literally took every single thing out of my room except the mattress and fitted sheet. When I returned home from school the stench had reached a new level. It was penetrating like a hot iron in my nose. Still I could not find the source. I slept that night in the living room. The next morning my mother had enough and decided she would look. Since all that was left was the mattress ( sitting on the floor) she decided to start there. She removed the fitted sheet and to my horror there was the smooshed decomposing corpse of a chipmunk, it was very bloated and the eyes had fallen out of its head…Most likely my cat had brought it in alive and it hid there to die. Either way I definitely slept directly on top of it only separated by a thin fitted sheets.
TLDR: mistook the smell of decomposition for my pubescent armpits and slept on top of a dead chipmunk for a night.
EDIT: a word
lskerlkse: your cat was like
Chronicmatt: Lil bastard bring em in alive to play with them. All except the baby bunny I found eviscerated in the dining room one day :(
| 3 | 8.333333 | |
1668392835 | 1668395799 | t3_yumc4p | t5_2to41 | 17 | FuelTankGone: TIFU by ruining a ten year old friendship over a confession
I (24M) have been friends with A (22F) for nearly ten years now. We meet online almost a decade ago back when we were both still in school and although we live quite far from one another we became close friends as we had similar interests and we both struggled with bullying back then.
We have been there for each other in our worst moments, there's been times when she's been the only one to wish me a happy birthday when not even my own family would bother to remember, we've talked over the phone and text messages for hours from the moment when I wake up all until she goes to sleep (6hr time difference).
I developed feelings for A. I'm not exactly when it started but it did. I never acted on these feelings since we're both so far away it probably would never work and my own insecurities get in the way. Still, I tried to remain a loyal friend and even as she started seeing other guys and got in relationships I always supported her through them.
This year, I managed to save up some money, plus got a job that pays considerably better, so my first thought was to finally buy some plane tickets so I could meet A in person. She was extremely happy when I gave her the news and showed her the tickets, even called her mom to tell her she wanted to drive me to her place so I could meet her and her family.
I can't express how happy I've been in these past few weeks. Unfortunately, the feelings I had for her never went away. I wasn't planning on telling her, but yesterday we were texting when she suddenly told me she hooked up with a guy she meet the day before and how she's hoping to see him again. That's when the problems started. We never talked about anything like that, not that there's anything wrong with it, but the realization that she would tell me about it so casually as if talking to a family member made me realize she'd never think of me the way I think of her.
A few hours after that conversation, I had been feeling a heavy burden inside of me the entire time, this is where I fucked up, I texted her and told her everything. I told her that I've liked her for a long time and how that conversation had destroyed me with the realization of her not feeling even remotely close to how I do. I told her I'd rather not go visit after all for it would be too painful to do so.
She understood, confirmed that she did in fact saw me as a friend and said she understood my decision. I told her I'd need some time as well. It was one of the most miserable days of my life, I ended up telling one of my best friends who took me out to try to cheer me up, after a night of sorrow and self-pity, the realization hit me hard the next day, I probably just lost the best friend I've ever had.
I texted her later on during the day apologizing for coming out so suddenly yesterday, she seemed understandably upset. I told her I still haven't canceled the flight or anything and I'd still love to finally meet up if possible, but that the decision was hers to take and if she feels uncomfortable after what happened yesterday I'd understand and will either cancel my flight or just take a second flight to another city further away or to a nearby country.
She said she wasn't sure, she said she can't stand that indecisiveness of mine as to just cancel my trip out of nowhere and then tell her I changed my mind, which in all honestly, she's right. She also said it hurt her how I could just abandon the idea of meeting up after a rant and tell her I want to distance from her. But in the end she said she had to think about it before she gave me an answer.
I realized that she didn't deserve my harsh words and I'm scum for giving in to my feelings and possibly ruining the longest friendship I've ever had. Now I'm just waiting for her to tell me her decision even though it's pretty clear at this point. I hurt the best friend I've ever had, I'm scum and she's in her right to tell me not to come anymore.
TL;DR: I decided to meet irl with my long-distance friend whom I've got feelings for and ruin it before even going by having an emotional breakdown.
Agreeable-Peace6482: Take a deep breath. It’s going to be ok. It’s going to be weird for a bit sure but you two have been friends for so long I’m sure you’ll be friends again. Give her some time to collect her thoughts. You are not scum! Be kind to yourself. You deserve it! Good luck!
FuelTankGone: Even if it is okay, I can't help but to feel that I blew up the one chance I had of finally meeting up in person. Which has been my dream for a long time and according to what she said, hers as well. But now it probably won't happen
| 3 | 5.666667 | |
1668394271 | 1668396309 | t3_yumu2j | t5_2to41 | 24 | sliquidbrain: TIFU by thinking I had an STI
I spent last weekend working during a convention, met a lot of people, busy hotel, lots of folks coming in and out. At one point I wasn't feeling too good, I did what I normally would never do, I had a bath in my hotel room. I return home and a couple days go by....
My dick starts burning. And then I had the sudden and increased urges to pee. What the fuck, did I get an infection?
I started taking a shit, I feel like I needed to pee really bad and I'm forcing it pretty hard, nothing is coming out. Next thing you know some white stuff squirts out and then piss starts flowing after it. And I'm like what the \*FUCK\*. Everything I look up is pointing to an STI at this point. Burning dick, increased urge to pee, and white discharge.
So I tell my girlfriend... "I know what this is going to sound like, but I think I have something... like a UTI... or maybe gonorrhea, maybe chlamydia". She surprisingly handled it pretty well and tried to downplay my symptoms and tell me it's probably just a UTI and we need to get cranberry juice and call the doctor.
But my anxiety at this point had gone through the roof, I was convinced I had a really fucked up infection because I saw that discharge.
Couple days later I go to my doctor's appointment. I explain all my symptoms to the doctor. Oh and this is the doctor that's replacing my current one when he retires. So keep in mind this is my first time meeting her. She checks my dick and balls, nothing looks off. I'm instructed to do a urine test, and I go about my day.
Next day, I'm taking a crap again, same feeling as last time, boom, huge blob of white stuff comes out my dong again. What the fuck?! I scoop some up this time...
I sniff it...
...its cum, it's fuckin' cum.
A few days later, I get the results, the test was negative. I had heightened anxiety for a week straight, was on edge and even started arguments with my girlfriend over stupid shit. I was paranoid, because I didn't know what kind of reaction I'd get if I came back from Toronto with an STI, because that absolutely sounds like I cheated.
Well it turns out it was the new body lotion I started using. I didn't associate with that because I never purposely put it on my dick. However, we recently got a second cat and I've been playing with the kitten more, which has been triggering my allergies. So I've done quick 2nd showers in the evening, and the body lotion was sometimes not fully soaked in and would run down my body and burn my dick.
The cumming while pooping thing, well, it's apparently more common than you'd think. It's not actually an orgasm, it's just excess ejaculate. Why this is happening, I'm not sure but I'll be getting my prostate checked.
TL;DR - Thought I caught an STI in a hotel bathtub, but it was just a new body lotion irritating my dick, and I also cummed while pooping, thinking it was discharge from an infection.
iaincaradoc: I don't think you've gotten to the right answer yet.
Try reading up a bit on "[retrograde ejaculation](https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/retrograde-ejaculation/symptoms-causes/syc-20354890)."
I'm not a doctor, but that'd be my bet if you're having an initial "difficulty" urinating, and then getting semen in your urine.
sliquidbrain: No I really dont think this is it because I don't get any of those other symptoms. And the burning is gone now that I'm more careful with that lotion. The increased urge to pee is gone too. My guess is I was more itchy closer to my bladder area than burning, which maybe was mistaken as a feeling to pee. Either way, I'll bring it up with the doctor. It could be this, could be enlargened prostate. Shit's weird regardless.
mikeyHustle: It's also possible (not saying it is or isn't) that you have problems with your pelvic floor muscles. That can make everything down there burn and itch and make it hard to go until the muscles relax. Wouldn't necessarily explain the cum, but when those muscles get confused, all bets are off with what those areas try to do.
| 4 | 6 | |
1668395063 | 1668396622 | t3_yun3te | t5_2to41 | 34 | emmaleebee2910: TIFU by telling my very close friend that I'm in love with him
We use to mess around about 4 and a half years ago, when I tell you it was the most amazing sex we'd ever had. We just flowed together.
I wanted to date him back then but we had su h completely different lives.
He got me through a really rough breakup and had help me through an addiction that got out of hand.
So last night he was supposed to come over and we were gonna have drinks and watch movies and then go for breakfast. But he got called in to do snow removal over night.
So I decided to go out for a few whiskey sour and then that led to having Jameson neat for the rest of the night.
I got home and I was terribly drunk.
I guess I messaged him a ton of messages about how he was my surrogate boyfriend and I can't date anyone while we are together like this.
I told him about how I wanted to have sex and live together and just make it like a fairy tale.
Just love each other until he leaves me again.
Just a side note, he's extremely handsome and has an amazing body, tall and strawberry blonde with a deep voice.
I am non of those things
I'm over weight and I am very strong
Average height and after 3 pregnancies, my beautiful tits aren't very nice.
I think sometimes he wants me but is ashamed of my large belly and stretch marks.
I come to peace with what I look like.
He called home today and asked me to explain all the tiktok and all the things I've said.
I had no words. I was messed up.
I just needed to get out of my head.TL;DR
jacantu: I told my friend when I fell in love with him. I did because I’ve always believed that if you feel so strongly about someone that you should let them know bc it’s such a beautiful thing. I was drunk as shit but really the booze facilitated my confession. Anyway, at the end of the day I never have to worry about the “what if’s” of the situation. Take it stride.
emmaleebee2910: I just feel like I ruined a great close friendship
I don't want to loss him
And he's not messaging me back
jacantu: I was in the same boat. Eventually we got back to our friendship. It just takes time because there’s a little tension.
emmaleebee2910: We are so close and it's sometimes confusing for me where the line is
| 5 | 6.8 | |
1668396624 | 1668398256 | t3_yunnco | t5_2to41 | 105 | wantmymilk: TIFU by touching my mom's sex toy
Yep. I was using my mom's bathroom to take a shower because my little sister was using the main one.
I turn around to get the shampoo that's behind me, and on my right I see this small pink thing that looks like chapstick. Exact same size as a usual one. It's a bit heavy, so I'm thinking "that's odd, chapstick is never this heavy." And as I'm looking at it, I see it has a small black button. Out of curiosity, I pressed it. And this little thing has a strong vibration.
I finish up, scrub my hand, and tell my sister about it. Her reaction was a wide mouth and quiet "she has one?" I go show her, and she just goes "Bro if that were me I would kms."
My mother used the bathroom before I went in, and probably forgot about it or something. But god I feel gross now
TL;DR took a shower, touched a vibrator
ETA forgot to say it's not something you'd expect a 45yr old to have out in the open. She made sure to tell me to hide mine so my sister doesn't find them, so I expected her to do the same
carlybarleypants: So? Your mom is a human being.
wantmymilk: I know, but it's the fact of I touched something that was near, if not *in* her vagina.
threedogcircus: You mean like... You?
wantmymilk: I should've added "recently"
AnonoMussChick: Ha ha HA!
| 6 | 17.5 | |
1668392754 | 1668990571 | t3_yumb4f | t5_2to41 | 415 | slt125: TIFU by showering my eyes with crazy glue
First ever post, I figured this FU warranted it. On mobile, please forgive formatting, yada, yada….
So today I decided to fix a pair of stud earrings whose front part had come apart from the backing. Husband grabs the crazy glue from the shed and leaves me to it.
Now, we can’t remember the last time we used said crazy glue, so inevitably the top part is hardened. I gently squeeze the bottle and find there is still liquid in there, so I figure I just need to make a small cut to the end to get rid of the dried part.
I make said cut and squeeze, but the direction that I’m pointing the open end in is straight towards my face. Suddenly, a good amount of glue is sprayed INTO both of my eyeballs and about 1/3 of face. I scream so loudly that my husband hears me in the shed about 50 feet away and through two closed doors.
He runs in to see me showering my eyes with the kitchen faucet.
“What the hell happened?!”
“I got crazy glue in my eyes!!! 😭😭😭”
“How the hell did you do that?!”
“CAN YOU NOT ASK ME HOW RIGHT NOW AND JUST HELP ME?! 😫😫😫”
Husband springs into action. There was about 5 minutes of fear wherein we both thought I was inevitably going to go blind. Alas, after about 15 minutes of rinsing with saline, dunking my eyes in warm water, and a couple of calls to medical professionals, our fears were alleviated. And here I am, half a day later able to see my screen and share with all of you. Yes, I will be seeing my optometrist this week. No, I am no longer allowed to use crazy glue unattended.
TL;DR : Old crazy glue sprayed into my eyes. I thought I was going to go blind. I did not.
Dumpythefrog: This is so scary. Happened to me once but with bleach toilet cleaner. It burned so bad I felt like someone stabbed my eyeball out. Was so terrified I was going to go blind I was crying hysterically and my mom and dad just laughed and said to rinse.
Anyways I’m fine now
Elgatee: Fortunately enough, eyes are quite resilient. It takes a decent amount of damage to permanently alter vision.
Which is also frightening when you consider how many people hurt their eyes on the daily watching a screen (me included)
simcityfan12601: Lol my eyes got ruined by lasik. Take care of your eyes.
EtherealPlagued: Same with my bf, I kept trying to urge him towards PRK instead but no dice. Now he’s got constant dry eye and his vision is much worse than when he originally had glasses. Plus they’re extremely sensitive to light and wind.
nachtgespenst: FWIW, I had PRK and had a very bad experience as well. Shitty vision and my eyes are dry and never comfortable.
EtherealPlagued: Well shit lol looks like a lose lose then.
| 7 | 59.285714 | |
1669831237 | 1669900598 | t3_z8y7ug | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by drugging my friends
[deleted]
YoghurtSafe1577: they need to calm down - it was an accident. no one died, no one got truly hurt. They must be pretty shitty friends to drop you over a slipup
realtors-suck: Lol a slip up…think about that. What if you were there with a significant other who isn’t a user and they 250mg.
Just laugh that off?
You’re just as bad as OP!
YoghurtSafe1577: they'll recover it isn't mdma
shadesofwolves: And if they lost their job?
YoghurtSafe1577: keyword: "if" probably don't get tested or nothing u would think OP would've mentioned it if they did
shadesofwolves: Oh of course, just deny being tested by a job that requires it, that'll help.
Your awareness is staggering, it's the principle of the matter. Even if it didn't cause that, it *could* have.
YoghurtSafe1577: didnt mention anything about denying to do a drug test at work.
yes, it could have, but it probably didn't and OPs friends overreacted to the extreme by cutting them off for a mistake that I can almost guarantee didnt affect them for very long
shadesofwolves: Just say you advocate for spiking as long as it's "almost guaranteed" to be fine.
YoghurtSafe1577: if it was genuinely accidental i don't see a problem - accidents happen literally all the time.
shadesofwolves: Did you read the post?
Choosing not to think or have any kind of conscience about it isn't an accident.
And just because there *might* not be any awful ramifications, doesn't mean there isn't a problem. Again, your awareness. Outstanding.
| 11 | 0.909091 | |
1668404404 | 1668511926 | t3_yuq4vm | t5_2to41 | 19,112 | Artistic-Resolve3493: TIFU by leaving my dildo in the shower
A little background info: 18F here and my family all shares 1 bathroom to shower. My parents are super strict when it comes to relationships and such.
Long story short I was doing my thang in the shower and left my dildo in the bathroom. It was completely out of my head so I didn't pick it up when I left the bathroom. My dad took a shower after me and that's when I realized the fucking dildo is still in there. I ran back into the bathroom and it's GONE. When I tell you my heart dropped to my ass... Maybe if it were my mom that found it I would feel a little less embarrassed, but MY DAD???? bro.
How am I supposed to get it back? Matter of fact what do I even do in this situation?? I feel like ripping my hair out of my head yall. I gotta face him at the dinner table too. Dawg I feel like I've committed a crime.
TLDR: Dad found my dildo in the shower. help
\[UPDATE\] woke up to see my dildo on my nightstand yippee!!!!
let me address some things:
1. It was a small 6 incher silicone suction dildo so pls stop asking me about the size.
2. No, (to my knowledge) my dad did not lick, sniff, or Use my dildo!! Stop drilling that into my head!!!
3. Dinner was normal. We talked like nothing happened just 30 minutes ago. I'd rather that be the case than vomit the food out from embarrassment.
4. Clearly, a large number of you don't know what its like living with POC parents. I know I didn't touch on it too much but if I explicitly said "my parents are super strict", wouldn't that give you a hint that I can't simply ask for it back. DAMN
And to the grown 30+ year old men in my dms, leave me alone!!! I'm fresh outta highschool and you're old enough to be my dad! What makes you think I wanna get down with a dad after experiencing this WITH MY OWN DAD!!
Reading the comments is giving me a brain aneurysm but honestly what was I excepting from reddit. Nonetheless, I'm glad some of you are getting a good laugh out of my fuck up.
SarielvonLith: I can't stop laughing!
In all seriousness, could he have thrown it out in the rubbish? Can't imagine he's kept it...
ooMEAToo: Sometimes parents like to keep little things from their children as memories of growing up. Umbilical cord, first shoes, lock of hair, first tooth, first 12 inch dildo.
Minilychee: There’s somehow weirder shit on that list than the dildo
evilstarlegacy: I insisted on keeping my twin daughter's ombilical cord because I thought it was a neat reminder of the pregnancy but turns out when it dries up it looks like a black miniature pebble. I don't know what I expected.
TJlovesALF1213: I'm 34 and my mom still has my umbilical cord. Last time I saw it (several years ago), it looked like a small stem from a dead plant.
randomdude2029: We kept my son's umbilical cord but it's in cryo-storage in case he needs the stem cells in later life!
StayFrostyRMT_: Wait what that actually makes so much sense, I wish my parents did this with my little brother's cord
Unl0vableDarkness: I feel like there's a sad story here.
StayFrostyRMT_: No not really, my parents just wanted to keep it also we didn't know this was a thing at the time, my little brother is as healthy as a kid his age can be but thank you for your concern :)
Unl0vableDarkness: Oh I'm so glad.
| 11 | 1,737.454545 | |
1669833044 | 1669869901 | t3_z8z0xb | t5_2to41 | 87 | kinyodas: TIFU By Ruining My Wife's Christmas Gift
My TIFU didn't happen this Christmas or even last season. I still feel bad about it to this day and for me it has served as a life lesson on how read your significant other and take a hint. I didn't realize it at the time, but she is an absolute messiah with knowing exactly people need or want; she has a sixth sense for gift-giving like a magical Santa at the end of a made-for-TV Christmas Special.
A few days before Christmas we were out spending the day shopping for our families. This particular mall was much longer than wide so we probably walked a few miles easy. By evening we were dog tired and discussing where to go out eat when I started thinking that I had just enough Christmas cash to get something I really wanted but never had. My family grew up poor - (how poor were you?) - so poor, I never had a really warm and fancy coat (it was always one or the other, never both) although we live in the south and the necessity of having one was far a few between seasons.
As we were passing by a store I saw something that made me swell with joy: a beautiful, fancy, leather, double-breasted coat reflecting the mall lights into my dilating pupils. I reached into my pocket and realized I had just enough left to get it.
I excitedly looked at my wife with a child's grin and had a dialogue something like this:
"You know, I have just enough cash left to get that coat. I think I'm going to get it - I never had one and I really like it."
"What? You don't need that - you have one already."
"Yeah, but I never had a really nice, warm one. I really like that one over there."
"Your coat is fine. You don't need another one. You're being silly."
At this point she is getting aggravated and I'm oblivious as a kid fixated on a new toy. I just stared at the display and said, "I've always wanted something both nice and warm to wear like that one. I think I'm going to buy it - yes, I'm definitely going to get it."
I start bee-lining towards the display like a moth to a streetlamp. She physically blocks me from walking towards the storefront and her voice suddenly becomes uncharacteristically panicked, angry, and demanding, "You don't need that. The one you have is fine. You're being rash. Stop behaving like a child."
I was now getting upset and thought," I'm shocked by her fortitude. She is being unreasonable. I have the money. The coat is right there. I'm not going to be bullied like this. I'm in the right here. She's out of line."
I took a deep breath, stood tall, looked her in the face and said, "I'm getting that coat."
She doubled down right back and sternly said, "No... you're... not."
I lost it. I put on my biggest big boy pants, stepped closer to her, inches away, pointed at the display and said in my most matter-of-fact voice, "Dammit, <wife>, I'm going in that store, I'm walking out with that coat, and there isn't a God-damned thing you can do about it."
Standing face-to-face, I saw her eyes turn glassy, eyebrows furled in anger now relaxed as she stepped back, covered her face with her hands and deafeningly cried for everyone to hear, sobbing between each word,
"YOU... RUINED... YOUR... CHRISTMAS... PRESENT!!!"
I stood shocked. The shoppers froze with all eyes on me. The mall fell silent sans the low-fi Christmas music from speakers high in the ceiling and the distant sound of child having a tantrum. My brain was working overtime registering what just happened. I just added two and two together and now it hit me right in the pills. I stood there like a dork, bags in hand, wife inconsolable and me petrified with no idea what to do - how to even start rectify my obliviousness turned Christmas spirit-killer. I felt so low I wanted to melt and disappear into the crevices of the floor, never to be seen or heard again.
I was in a state of shock, I don't remember exactly what happened next; I recall a lot of apologizing and ass-kissing with a well-deserved pranging about how I can't read a room or take a hint.
Despite my epic failure, I learned how to better understand my wife and read between the lines. I speak like a realist and she an impressionist - Logos and Ethos I suppose.
So if there's something you really need or want, and someone says you don't need it, and a birthday or holiday is near, maybe dwell on it a bit before acting.
FYI - When I opened my present on Christmas morning, it was that coat.
TL;DR - I ruined my wife's Christmas gift for me by trying to buy it for myself and not taking a hint.
P4INKILL3R_GER: actually i dont think thats a tifu
the wife could have taken so many different ways to subtly give a hint someone may actually understand.
between angry voice "you dont need it and wont get it" and "you ruined your christmas present" there should have been a more subtle middleway
For example "Please dont buy it for now, theres a reason why im asking this of you"
While at that point it might click already or not, but everyone keeps face and gift is still a surprise for the most part.
Ocean_Spice: >between angry voice "you dont need it and wont get it" and "you ruined your christmas present" there should have been a more subtle middleway
I think you missed part of the post? Cause she’d already had to tell him twice before the two you mentioned, brushing it off as “You already have one, your coat is fine, you don’t need a new one.”
RexElectoribus: As someone who also grew up poor, usually with only one coat and not a nice one, “you don’t need that. You’re being silly. You have a coat and it’s fine.” Sounds, and sounded while reading, like “we don’t have the money for that we need to save what we have instead of spending it on something you do not absolutely NEED.” So no the wife saying that in that way was not good hinting and she absolutely should’ve said something more direct and should NEVER have said “you’re acting like a child”
| 4 | 21.75 | |
1668404906 | 1668417391 | t3_yuqad5 | t5_2to41 | 29 | nachocheesetriangle: TIFU by confessing my feelings to my best friend the day after he broke up with his girlfriend
This is a throwaway because I dont want him to find this. I (23 M) have had feelings for my best friend, J (24 M) since high school. Im not very open about being gay as I live in a very conservative area and hes one of the few people that know along with my mum and my sister. My dad is a very devoted christian and is extremely vocal about his hatred of the LGBTQ community, so I haven't come out to him. (This becomes relevant later in the story) When J got with his girlfriend, E (24 F) I was obviously very happy for him, but deep down I was devastated. I know its selfish, and trust me I hated myself for it, but I couldn't help being upset. A few weeks ago, E broke up with him and he was very distraught (understandably), but honestly I think it was good for him, she seemed really toxic to me. Obviously I'm biased but I like to think I'm pretty good at recognising those kinds of people. Anyway, he called me and asked if he could come over to my place for drinks because he was feeling "really shitty and I need to talk to someone who I can trust." Of course I accepted, I wanted to be there for my best friend when he was going through something. So he came over that night and we got absolutely wasted. We talked for a bit, and then one thing led to another and we ended up having sex. The next morning I woke up and he wasn't there. I kept trying to call him but he wouldn't pick up. I decided to confess my feelings over text, because he wasn't picking up his phone and I couldn't ignore what had happened the night before. He's always told me he was straight, but there was definitely feelings there. I texted him about my feelings and how I've felt about him for the past few years. Then for the rest of the day my phone was blowing up from friends and family telling me how much of a bad person i was. I even got messages from my dad telling me how disappointed he was in me and how upset he was that I was gay and didn't tell him. J has told everyone in my life about this and my relationships are being destroyed.
TLDR: My best friend broke up with his gf and I confessed my feelings to him the next day. He then outed me to all of my friends and family because of it.
Plenty_Intention1991: Wait though... were talking about consensual sex right? I don’t see why that makes OP the bad guy like some people are saying. Based on what you said you didn’t actively sabotage his relationship with the ex and only you know if you did anything predatory but you didn’t say that you did. As a straight man I’ve gotten drunk af with best friends after breaks ups and one thing never led to another. Sure as far as I know my friends aren’t gay but even if they were I wouldn’t end up f-ing them the day after a break up.
Am I missing something?
threequartertoupee: You go to a close friend for emotional support, you don't expect them to take advantage of your vulnerability.
OP has been (I suspect deliberately) vague on how 'one thing led to another'.
Plenty_Intention1991: Yeah there are still some big question marks there. I guess my point though is that if the story we heard is true and if we gave OP the benefit of the doubt then maybe homeboy wasn’t as straight as we were lead to believe. According to OP is was straight guys idea to drink with him. Maybe it just went further than he expected and now his form of denial is to attack OP. I’m thinking about this situation too much for having to stake in it lol. I just can’t wrap my head around “accidentally” having sex with a male friend.
threequartertoupee: I don't think sexual preference really comes into it. As a guy, I wouldn't go hook up with a female friend after she'd broken up with a partner and reached out for support.
| 5 | 5.8 | |
1669825215 | 1669904361 | t3_z8vndz | t5_2to41 | 22 | FlatulentWallaby: TIFU by testing out the zoom function on a basketball team's camera
Obligatory this happened 15 years ago.
I got a job being the cameraman for our basketball team for game film which doesn't sound as fancy as it really is, it was basically just me with a camcorder following the players around and getting footage of the game that they could then watch later.
This is back when camcorders only used tapes and you couldn't delete anything you shot which was my first mistake.
My second mistake was getting bored during halftime and trying out the zoom function on the kids in the stands across from me who happened to be some of my friends and the girl I had to crush on at the time. So I'm zooming in and out with the camera for probably 3 minutes when I realized that it was still recording. I knew that the team was going to rewatch this footage for game footage and I desperately tried to find a way to delete or go back over the footage with game footage, but unfortunately there was no rewind function on the camcorder.
The basketball coach happened to be my math teacher as well and thankfully we had a pretty good relationship since I played on his team earlier, but that also means he called me out in front of the entire class during math and basically said " did you have fun with the camera last game FlatulentWallaby?" And I knew immediately that he had seen the footage, which was probably one of the more embarrassing moments of my life.
TL;DR When filming a basketball game for the high school team I forgot to stop recording when I was playing around with the camera and ended up looking like a creep spying on my friends from across the stands.
AcrobaticSource3: So while the camera was zooming in on your crush, was there a little zooming happening in your pants?
Mode-Klutzy: You’re not wrong. People and “social sensitivity and over reaction” put you in the negatives (and soon to be me as well)
| 3 | 7.333333 | |
1668854734 | 1668909515 | t3_yz94w0 | t5_2to41 | 2,718 | NotGoodAtBreathing: TIFU allowing a dog to sniff my pockets
[removed]
Howsyourbellcurve: Bit of advice. Most dogs will get very interested if you sit or lay on the ground around them. Better luck next time I guess.
lilsmudge: Yes. Definitely don’t chase; chasing only leads to “yay, we’re running!” Or “holy shit it’s chasing me!!!” Responses from the dog. Dogs are faster than you.
slitlip: As a fed ex driver. Show them th back of your hand underneath the face. Also If the dogs an asshole keep your eyes on them.
HotAndSexyZebra: This isn’t a good idea for every dog. A lot of dogs will take a hand moving towards their face as aggression so do it very slowly, make sure it’s in the dogs direction but not close enough to look like you’re touching their face or just wait for the dog to come to you and sniff you (won’t work for dogs that just won’t come over though)
Nivekian13: That is why it is the back of your hand, not the palm, and hold it for the dog to get your scent. If the dog is aggressive, don't move toward it, win it's trust. If you cannot, don't trust it.
HotAndSexyZebra: The rest of your comment has a point but it doesn’t matter what part of your hand it is. Any part moving towards a dogs face could make it snap, it doesn’t even need to be an aggressive dog, just a scared one.
Ken1drick: You never seen anyone do this or what ?
Theyre not talking about shoving their hand in the dog's face, usually this gesture is slow, and you dont go all the way, half the distance, rest is the dog or whatever animal coming to it.
It is the single best way to greet a dog or a cat or I guess many other domestic animals you dont know beforehand, it is very similar to what they would do themselves when meeting another dog
HotAndSexyZebra: I have seen it before and it can seem aggressive at times. Idk why you’re talking to someone with a zoology degree about animal behaviour.
Maybe go back and read my comment? You’re starting to sound like a parrot because I’ve already said exactly what you’re saying.
Ken1drick: Oh you have a zoology degree then youre clearly an expert sorry for bothering your indeniable truth.
I bow before your immense knowledge lord of the animals
HotAndSexyZebra: It’s funny how you’re so intent on calling me wrong when you were literally just repeating exactly what I said in my first comment.
“This gesture is slow” “you don’t go all the way” is the exact same as “do it very slowly” “make sure it’s in the dogs direction but not close enough to touch their face”
Sorry I’m just trying to give advice to stop people getting bitten lmao. And yes, I do know more about animals than you because I have a zoology degree (the same way I’m an expert on it), the exact same how someone with a computer science degree knows more about computers than me or someone with a physics degree knows more about physics.
Get a grip lmao
Ken1drick: I really dont care about proving you wrong or anything.
Just answering a rude insulting and provocative comment the same way.
Youre never going to educate anybody about anything with your behavior, maybe you should reflect on your demeanor instead of calling me out for no reason, because yes, you started this gig bro not me....YMMV
have a nice life
HotAndSexyZebra: Please explain any part of my comment that was rude.
Ken1drick: The whole
| 14 | 194.142857 | |
1668412268 | 1668415826 | t3_yusc32 | t5_2to41 | 37 | Sweaty_Fun_6366: TIFU by starting a chain reaction of throwing up
Preface, this happened two days ago.
Also TW for emetophobia.
With that out of the way, onto the fuck-up. I'm currently a University Student living with 13 other roommates. We all share a social space, and occasionally hang out or watch movies in there. Being University students, we also have alcohol.
On the night in question, we had, between 5 of us, some odd 40 shots of (somewhat) diluted vodka. Now I'm not a heavy drinker, and have only begun drinking very recently, so those shots hit me like a truck. At some point, I began to feel like I was floating a foot off the ground. It felt like my stomach was doing flips around my body.
At this point I (think) I blurted out something about going to the bathroom to be sick. I received some chorus of "Don't be sick, or I'll be sick". I get up to head to the bathroom...and was promptly sick all over myself, the ground, and the girl sat opposite me. She then, quite understandably, instantly threw up. The guy next to her? Spewing like a fountain.
It kinda gets blurry past this point, but from what I've read in the groupchat, 4 of us were sick all over the room. Some brave soul took pictures after hearing us retching from downstairs, and posted the aftermath. You couldn't see patches of the ground where the \*forbidden soup\* had pooled into large puddles. The walls looked like we tried to give them a new paint job, and the roof wasn't spared either.
I've been avoiding talking to anyone so far. The shame is too great. If anyone has any other comforting (and similarly embarrassing) stories, share them so I can take some solace in our shared suffering.
Socially fucked people, strong together.
&#x200B;
TL;DR- I threw up. She thew up. He threw up. We threw up. We threw up everywhere. May God bless whoever has to clean it up.
grinning_imp: “…this happened two days ago.”
“May God bless whoever has to clean it up.”
…
Is it still not fucking cleaned up?
Sweaty_Fun_6366: Someone reported it to staff, and they've locked the door. We think they're getting professional cleaners to take care of it lmao
| 3 | 12.333333 | |
1669835969 | 1669839425 | t3_z90eet | t5_2to41 | 1 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling my enemy she was perfect!
[deleted]
ThatKaleidoscope8736: lol you were a "playboy" at 13. You need to learn how to cope about things. If this almost drove you to suicide seek therapy
thedisoriantedwhale: well my friends always said i dated over 39 girls
but it isn't that. she was always harassing me and called me names not to mention almost got me expelled for dating her friend
ThatKaleidoscope8736: At your age it's not dating. Maybe stop focusing on females and focus on yourself
thedisoriantedwhale: ya thats what i recently have done. i changed my name and stopped chasing girls and started chasing good grades. which is prob why what she said hurt me so much
| 5 | 0.2 | |
1668418768 | 1668437155 | t3_yuu6hz | t5_2to41 | 5,449 | Throwaway19197777: TIFU by accidentally hooking up with my mate's dad
So the interesting part of this story all happened a number of months ago. I (18m) had just turned 18 at the time and had already spent a while coming to terms with my sexuality. As I grew more comfortable with myself I started to do slightly more experimental things like shower completely naked in the open showers at my local pool when I was sure I was the only one left late at night (something I would have been far too anxious to do when I was younger).
On one occasion where I had just finished training and was completely nude in the shower, I happened to be joined by an older guy. He was probably in his early-mid 40s and was also not wearing his bathing suit in the shower. I remember immediately feeling my face heat up because it felt like I'd been 'caught' by this older guy (even though what I was doing is relatively normal). This dude also chose to use the shower head immediately next to the one I was using, despite this open shower being pretty large.
As a curious lad, I couldn't really help but try to take a look at what this dude was working with whenever I got the chance. Naturally, it didn't take him too long to realise what I was doing, and before long he invited me to take a closer look, so to speak. One thing led to another and I ended up on my knees losing my oral virginity right there in that shower. Two weeks later he was there again. And again two weeks after that. We would repeat the same process of showering next to each other then heading into a cubicle together and me getting to work.
Eventually he started to show up less and less until it just kinda stopped happening altogether. Fast forward a few months up to now. Final exams for high school are coming up and me and my friends are all "studying" (but really just kinda goofing around) at this one guy's house and after a while his dad gets home. As you probably figured out by the title, in walks the guy from the pool who I used to fool around with. Again I feel my face heat up and I nearly die from embarrassment on the spot (and I'm sure he felt the same way). Neither of us said anything and after a brief inner-debate I decided this is a secret that goes with me to the grave.
Suffice to say I haven't really been able to look my friend in the eye since.
TLDR: Got down and dirty with an older guy a bunch of times, later on figured out the older guy is my buddy's dad which may have ruined my friendship if I can't stay chill.
askewboka: Are you open about your sexuality to your friends?
Is your friends dad married? If you answered yes to both of these questions, let me tell you about extortion
Throwaway19197777: Haha that is an interesting point but I can only answer yes to one of those questions
askewboka: You really only need to answer yes to one.
Is that why you’re concerned? Because you’re still in the closet? His dad won’t out you. Imagine that conversation!
Throwaway19197777: I mean that's always a concern. I'm worried that somehow this will all get out and I'll be outed and lose a good friendship (probably a few tbh)
SciFiChickie: Um OP… is it really a good friendship if they stop being your friends because of your sexuality?
Throwaway19197777: I mean it's one of the best ones I have... Idk
SciFiChickie: I ask because my best friend came out after high school. We are still best friends 23 years later.
Throwaway19197777: You must be a damn good friend then
SciFiChickie: He’s a damn good friend worth keeping.
PIN360: Umm I think he’s more worried about losing his friend due to him hooking up with his dad. All the tolerance in the world won’t matter when it comes to a broken home due to your dad and friend having a go in the shower.
SciFiChickie: That shouldn’t be told, that’s definitely go to the grave shit. And I don’t see friends dad ever letting it slip, since he’s married.
PIN360: “That shouldn’t be told” and that’s what he’s worried about. TF you think is the point of this?
SciFiChickie: Go back to the 1st comment I replied to and read it again he specifically stated he hasn’t told his friends his sexuality because he’s afraid they’ll stop being his friends.
PIN360: Yeah I’m sure that’s the ONLY thing he’s worried about.
| 15 | 363.266667 | |
1668420012 | 1668425625 | t3_yuuls3 | t5_2to41 | 14 | Downtown-Forever-479: TIFU. Not today, but def think about it everyday…
She was such an amazing woman. She was everything to me. I was happy, she was happy. But then I decided to be a dumbass and let my mind wander off after 2 years of being with said girl. I ended up hurting the only person I truly love. C if you ever read this, just know, I regret every decision I made and wish I could redo our time together, because I only understand now how stupid I was and how loyal, understanding and committed you were to me. I am sorry, I am sorry for all the lies and the deceit. I was a fuckin stupid piece of shit. I had absolutely no fuckin clue about absolute most perfect partner I had right in front of me. I have never loved anyone as much as I have loved you. I have sought after what I felt for you in others. I hope you find your Prince Charming…
TL;DR: I cheated and I regret it every single day of my life.
switchbreed: Sorry that you did this to yourself and her. The grass is never greener on the other side.
Don't cheat people. It destroys the person being cheated on. I was cheated on and I know it's not my fault but it still feels like it was my fault. It gave me ptsd and made me very fragile. 2 and a half years later and it still haunts me. I'm doing better but I still get reminded of it now and then. Don't do it.
soup___nazi: Perfectly said, I will never recover from that and no matter how much time passes it still hurts like a dagger to the back. It's been almost a decade and the images and pain creep up on me time and time again, out of nowhere I find myself completely gutted in tears. As much as it's not my fault I found myself internalizing what happened and placing the blame on my looks or what I did or did not do instead of placing the true blame on my partner and realizing what a piece of disgusting shit he was for it. It completely destroyed my self worth and how I go about relationships and trusting others in general. Cheating really does ruin people and they carry that with them forever. Not going to feel bad that OP is suddenly remorseful, she deserves so much better and I hope she sees that now and finds her true happiness like she deserves, without him..
switchbreed: A very sad and familiar story. I'm 100% with you. I wish you the best in life, you deserve good things.
soup___nazi: Thanks friend, right back at you ❤️🩹
| 5 | 2.8 | |
1668420158 | 1668462921 | t3_yuunrk | t5_2to41 | 58 | LeChonkPerfection: TIFU by making my dad think I am depressed
Alt account cause reasons.
So I (26m) live with my parents cause housing in the Netherlands is a total bitch at the moment.
I was making my morning stroll with my dad and the dog and we were talking about me buying I a house. I graduated recently and got some savings.
My dad advised me to become a bit more stable before moving out since you never know what might happen in the future, and I agree. He was ofcourse talking about financial stability and not mental but I decided to joke about it. Turns out people who are 30 years older don’t always understand our jokes.
I told my dad:” Stable? What do you mean? I consider myself stable since I didn’t cry myself to sleep for atleast 3 nights in a row”
He looked at me with a weird face but didn’t comment. We walked and the day went on.
Two days later he texted me with a phone number telling me I should call her. Me thinking it was a financial advisor or something related to buying/renting.
I called, turns out it’s his old therapist (he went through a burnout 15 years ago)… she wanted to make an appointment but I had to explain that I am not in need of one.
Had to explain it later to my dad, most awkward talk of my life.
Tl;Dr: made a joke, dad thought I was depressed
murr77: He's a good dad.
wabamad: A very good dad
| 3 | 19.333333 | |
1669837919 | 1669935004 | t3_z919t2 | t5_2to41 | 10 | TIFUIncelThrowAway: TIFU by accidently standing up a real date... my (27M) first date ever.
I (27M) am an incel and have never had any luck with women. But I always hopelessly go on a bunch of dating apps. I am not a very attractive guy 5'8 , overweight, and most other men mog me. I am use to catfish and scammers on them and don't believe I ever talked to someone genuinely interested until I met her who I will call "Z".
We matched and she messaged first. I figured it was just another scam or catfish. Not only from experience but she was very attractive and the fakes always use attractive girls pictures. But sometimes they have nudes of the pictures that they stole and I could use that for personal use. So we begin to chat and she doesn't ever ask for anything like money or joining her only fans. Instead Z, just talks to me about so many subjects and I find that I am having a real good time talking to them.
I figured it was a catfish but I'm lonely and could use someone to talk to. We talked about our jobs and families. It was so odd because catfish tend to want to get sexual fast to lure in. But instead we talked about our hobbies which she shared many of mine like gaming. I figured by this it had to be another man I was talking to who was just being honest about their hobbies. We even talked about our families and jobs and it felt like I was really getting to know "her" but of course it was a man right?
This went on for four days. I never connected to someone like this before in my life. Until she messaged me mid-day and asked if I'd like to meet her. My heart felt crushed by this because I knew this was just a lure to stand me up. It wouldn't be the first time I fell for a catfish years ago. I knew it was fake but it felt so real and I would wake up everyday wanting to talk to them more. I hesitated and said I would be busy for the next few days just to buy myself more time as with this person I didn't feel so alone and wanted to extend it.
She accepted that and told me whenever I am free and said she prefers to not go to expensive places for first dates. I thought this was a lure to entice me to get catfished easier. But I had to give a response so I told her in a week we could meet for lunch. She asked me to pick the place and I chose a diner that I actually go to sometimes and like it was the first thing that popped into my head. She accepted and we continued to talk everyday. But the date day came and I just figured I was going to get an insulting message and mocking me for being catfished or just be ghosted... instead she started messaging.
She told me she was there. Asked if I am there already too. About 10 minutes go by and she says she is still waiting and hopes I at-least text her back. I didn't know what to make of this. I've never had a catfish call me out for not being there before don't they just have to assume I went? I'm freaking out and couldn't bring myself to text her back because I thought maybe it will just be a guy who actually went there and that's how he knows I'm not. 5 minutes more passed and she gets upset and accuses me of standing her up and seems genuinely upset and I just remained silent and then she blocked me. At this point I don't know if I fucked up or dodged a bullet and it was a guy there.
Now, I have an alt account that I catfish women with using stolen pictures of chads that I take off of instagram. Three days later I see her again and she matches with my alt. I look at her photos again for personal use and the newest one is a picture of her sitting at the very diner I told her to meet me at. She was real and I just stood up the only woman her has ever given me a chance in my life. Who I actually liked too and felt like I connected with.
TL:DR I thought she was a catfish and too good to be true. It turns out she was real and I stood up the only woman ever to show interest in me.
Wynotboth: You need therapy.
TIFUIncelThrowAway: Therapy is a scam and even it if wasn't it cannot fix my height and looks. So it will solve nothing. I will never be a chad.
PaleFollowing3763: Just grow some balls and get confidence. You could try and message her. But you probably don't have the balls to do that either
TIFUIncelThrowAway: You're right and I am going to take your advice. I'm going to use my alt account to secure a date with her again and just show up. Even though she may be expecting the chad maybe she will take a moment to listen to me and hear me out.
If she rejects then it would be nice to actually speak my mind straight to a woman's face over rejection rather than online. You convinced me, thank you.
CanIHaveASong: You stood her up, and now you're going to catfish her for a second date?
Dude... you're messed up.
TIFUIncelThrowAway: I'm not a chad the fact that one woman even spoke to me let alone wanted to go on a date is someone like me is something I could never believe. The top 20% of men take all the women so I don't think you are in any place to judge me for doing what I need to when I finally have a chance.
RavynRydge666: Quit watching Andrew Tate, grow up and get help. At this point it's your own fault you're an incel.
TIFUIncelThrowAway: Andrew Tate's the reason why I am both working and going to college right now. The man has radically changed my life, I use to sit home and just be on incel forums and play video games before. The man saved my life.
RavynRydge666: Just be mindful that he's selling a product, he's selling his point of view. And his point of view can be incredibly toxic and destructive. If all you want is to be a fuckboi and sleep around, then keep on. But if you want a long term, long lasting relationship with a woman that cares about you and listens, I'd give up Tate. Just my two cents, from an older and wiser man than Andrew.
| 10 | 1 | |
1668424844 | 1668426780 | t3_yuwbqc | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by pushing my digestive system to its (apparent) limit
[deleted]
JustKidding0818: Fart can't activate smoke alarms...
Brandanpk: Unless the smoke alarms also work as gas leak detectors?
| 3 | 3 | |
1668426517 | 1668483175 | t3_yuwy91 | t5_2to41 | 1,442 | chunderilla: TIFU by being a dumb husband and not paying attention to my wife (or anything else for that matter)
So we just bought a new house and moved in. The movers were a bunch of thieves that refused to take anything that wasn't a large piece of furniture claiming that it wasn't part of the deal (it was, and it's on the contract we signed, but that's another story and a battle for later), so when we moved, I needed to basically move everything myself and unload everything into our cellar whilst they were simultaneously loading stuff upstairs.
We've been slowly unloading stuff in the cellar in the last few weeks, but there's still a bunch left for us to do. In addition, there's also a lot of junk from the old owner still here and it's been piling up in our cellar as we unpack so this weekend, I thought I'd just rent a van, gather all of this stuff and take it to the dump. My wife's parents were visiting so they helped with loading the van. Quite honestly, the amount of stuff was so overwhelming as it is, I didn't bother checking anything, I just wanted it all gone so I put all the stuff in the van, drove it off to the dump, got rid of it all and came home.
So today, my wife asks me "Do you remember those 3 boxes I kept near the staircase that I told you that I put aside specifically to not get chucked? Where did you put them?"
I have no idea what the fuck she is talking about. I never heard her telling me this, but her mother backs her up telling me where I was, what I was doing and when I was told this and that I acknowledged what she was saying at the time. I've obviously been told and I do vaguely remember the moment in question but I cannot recall what exactly I was told at all. I just got rid of all the boxes of junk I say.
Her eyes widened, and her jaws drop as she loudly utters the words "Are you serious?" to me rather incredulously. Now I'm panicking. What the fuck did I throw away?
Well, nothing of importance, you know. Just all the folders in our old office. You know, things like our tax records, our birth certificates, ALL of our daughter's documents, all of our job contracts, our banking documents, my wife's degrees and education certificates, and a lot more.
We're currently looking, but I've also just recently become a citizen of the country we live in and I think the passport was meant to surrender was also part of the casualties as it was in the folder with all the documents pertaining to this entire process which was also in these boxes.
Gentlemen. Give me a medal. I'm a fucking moron and I don't know what to do anymore.
**tl;dr: Was told to not throw away stuff. Threw away the stuff.**
I should also add for clarity: When we found those particular boxes after the whole moving company fiasco, we had stored them to be accessible just in case we needed to access those documents. The office is still a bit of a construction site, so they have no place to go right now. They were in the way of everything else and my wife thought she would do me a favour and move them out the way so I could get the rest of the stuff out without any bother. She apparently told me and I did not hear this, even though I apparently affirmed to her that I heard her and that I wouldn't throw them out, but somehow I wasn't paying attention or something. **They were even fucking clearly labeled**. I don't know how this happened, but this is entirely my fault.
Edit: Just wanted to mark out a part some people seem to have missed in the OP. There's also [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/yuwy91/comment/iwbn58n/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) when it comes to clearly marking stuff. I just fucked up.
Edit2: I’m trying to respond to everyone but this keeps coming up. I watched the boxes get crushed. They needed to make room for more paper waste. I cannot go to the dump and find them again. Even if I did, they’d be nearly impossible to take apart without damaging them if they weren’t already completely destroyed.
Here’s some[ footage of what happens to paper in a hydraulic press](https://youtu.be/qTz7aKEJLV4).
# UPDATE
First of all, I just want to thank a lot of you for the helpful advice, the kind words and comfort. The jokes helped a bit too even though it's still a bit of a sore spot right now. I especially liked that one comment that just said "hahahahahahaha". That was my wife's favourite one, so kudos to that person. Also, sorry to [this guy](https://imgur.com/a/siRQcY1) who messaged me that was especially upset.
Anyway, we've had some time to reflect on what's happened, her parents have just left as well and we've all had a chat about it. Just want to preface this with; none of this really matters and we aren't putting the blame on anyone.
I think we may know how they ended up in the van. My Mother in law saw the boxes my wife moved aside and moved them upstairs and my father in law thought those boxes were from me and loaded them in the van whilst my mother in law thought that my wife moved them completely out the way. Now the boxes are labeled in English and my in-laws do not speak English, so they wouldn't have have been able to tell. All in all, there were no ill intentions on anyone's part. A miscommunication, poor planning, and many other factors have come into play here. We've decided to not start pointing fingers because it isn't very conducive.
My wife and I have talked about this ourselves last night and we made a list of everything that we think is missing and this morning we got in touch with as many people as we could get a hold of. The good news is that my Wife and Daughter's documents are mostly recoverable. Apparently this happens a lot (with individual documents rather than the whole motherlode) so it's just a matter of money and time and getting in touch with various departments, but most of their documents are recoverable. She's waiting on responses from the educational institutions about her educational documents. We have digital copies of everything apart from 3 documents, so that has been quite helpful.
My documents are a bit trickier. I mean, quite a few are recoverable, especially now that I am a citizen, but things like my Birth Certificate will require quite a bit of bureaucracy to be attested and so on. Either way, we're working through solutions together.
I didn't really want to bring my marriage into this, but I told my wife about this post and she's read through the comments and insisted that I mention this because some of these comments about us getting a divorce or comments speculating how she feels has really bothered her. She wants to be clear that she knows this was a FU and that she has never felt like I have ever ignored her on purpose ever before. She does not blame me (even though I still blame me), and to jump from this to a divorce is not exactly the route she'd go like to go. To quote her directly "I'd much rather constantly torture you about this for hot chocolate in bed and flowers every week until we get everything back"
We're not splitting up, we're not angry with anyone, we're moving on and trying to sort it out.
Thanks again for all the lovely comments!
superthrust123: Hope you find them, that must be horrible. Somehow my grandma managed to put a nickname on her social security card 80 years ago, and just fixing that is a nightmare.
I learned the hard way when I was younger. Take all the really important stuff and put it in one box. Doesn't matter if it's unrelated stuff in this case. That box then gets treated like the president's football. My wife and I had someone physically hold that box until they moved in the safe.
apcolleen: I have ADHD and this is what I made
https://imgur.com/gallery/Hr2q0ch
xenophilian: You probably know this, but these locks are dead simple to pick
apcolleen: We watch lock picking lawyer in this house too.Heck, Amazon drivers are scared to drive up our driveway, we have no kids, great friends with healthy attitudes and uhh good luck finding it in my office which generally looks like a bomb went off cause r/adhd... I know where it is and I can grab it in a fire if need be.
This is mostly just a tool for managing a huge issue for my ADHD which is smol more important papers. I also[ use this](https://imgur.com/kXk9RLQ) which is an old wall mounted ash tray from the 70s or 80s for my keys and pocket detritus since I don't use a purse .
beefknuckle: but do you have ADHD
apcolleen: Oh yeah it sucks. AND Im going through perimenopause which a lot of women who have never had any symptoms mirroring ADHD suddenly get to be like us for a few years but they get to go back to normal after they reach full menopause. Im going to my gyno tomorrow actually because Im dropping things again and Im forgetting things even if I write them down and thinknig through concepts and processes is like trying to hammer warm brie to a tree.
| 7 | 206 | |
1668426423 | 1668497008 | t3_yuwx1w | t5_2to41 | 487 | Bigsam411: TIFU by nearly melting in my hotel room while on a business trip in Brazil.
So I'm currently on a business trip in Brazil. I got here last Wednesday and i leave on Friday. It's really hot here. Also this is my 6th time being here since 2016 but my first since 2019.
When I got here I noticed a few lights in my room wouldn't come on and the AC wouldn't work. I looked at the weather and decided it would be cool at night so it wouldn't be too bad if I left windows open. Now I should have immediately complained. The first couple nights were not that bad though. By then I had been there too long and felt weird complaining several days in.
The last two nights were especially hot and I was pretty miserable. Yesterday I was even in the room most of the day. I literally slept naked instead of just complaining about the room.
Well this morning my coworker and I are working out of the hotel due to a holiday and the office we normally work out of being closed. I suggested we use his room cause the AC worked. When we got into his room though a light bulb went off in my head.
In his room he inserted his card into this panel next to the door. The AC and some lights then came on. I realized that's how I keep myself from melting every night. I went to my room and tested this out and realized how dumb I was. 5 nights could have been way cooler.
Worst part is that I remember doing this now the last times I was here. I had just forgotten because I don't think I have encountered a hotel in the states that does this.
TL:DR: I melted in my hotel room for like 5 nights and realized this morning I could have not been melting by inserting a room key into a thing.
Lymantria24: Isn't that how every hotel works tho? I feel like the US is being weird again
Bigsam411: Not in the states. I don't think I have ever encountered one like that there. I do think it's better of course because it saves energy when I'm not in the room. I just forgot about it.
Fenixstorm1: I've travelled extensively for 3 years in the states....they absolutely have this.
Polkadot1017: I live in the US and have used plenty of hotels and I've never even heard of this. It's definitely not super common.
ShinkuDragon: maybe not in the US, but it seems to be fairly common in LATAM. i know some Sheratons and Hiltons do.
| 6 | 81.166667 | |
1669839559 | 1669841979 | t3_z91zrf | t5_2to41 | 2 | Kolbenfresserle: TIFU by losing weeks of a BIG number of people's time, energy and partially money in the last 24h.
I am SO fucked rn!
In a nutshell: I was working on my first ever film. It wasn't big, but tricky. I got so into it, I wrapped in countless people. Including my friend who had an exam a few weeks later. The movie wasn't finished, because some very important scenes were missing, but couldn't be shot now. Time passed an now is finally the time where I could work on the shots.
Well......a week ago, my laptop flatlined. I had backups of basically everything and thought that at least the project was saved in the Adobe Cloud automatically. There are no backups on my SD cards, because I have the stupid habit of "wiping them clean" to not get cluttered.
But no worries, I thought. I send them to my cousin's husband who's a tech guy. He looked my hard drive up and could pull some files. However, when he got to the only important cases, he got error messages. Copying the folders, but without the content. He tried to restart the hard drive. Suddenly it showed no files at all. Now he's letting a special program run over it. It looks what's still saveable. It will take hours and I'll get new news tomorrow. After that, the only thing that is potentially possible is to pay for a really expensive hard drive saving in a lab. But -as my relative said - the chances look pretty bad.
And here's the thing: I -of all people - am not that attached to that movie. It was done hasty -lots of it looks like shit.
However, a lot of other people are waiting on it. They spend time and partially money (bus etc.) to help me. If I tell them that everything is lost, I. AM. DEAD. I'm *not* going to have friends anymore after this! Mind you; I'm already a screw-up. Not in the way of "stole from them", but enough. I'm not having the benefit of "best friend" or "childhood friend". I was happy I had some people that liked me enough. They won't kill me (though they should tbf), but that will be the last straw.
And obv. besides them are all the other people. Because my fucking ass told half the world about this shit!
TLDR: Made a movie, lost all of it in a hard drive crash, hard drive in limbo -most likely done for, cue back to being a lonely screw-up, instead of social screw-up.
MichaelHammor: Calm down. I have had this happen to entire chapters of novels I have written. Guess what happens if the files can't be recovered? You get to reshoot those scenes, fix mistakes, and refine the quality of your work. The second time I wrote those chapters I wrote faster and ended up with a better story than if the originals were never lost.
The story is in you. You don't need the hard drive. Tell people you had an epiphany and are going a different direction with the project.
Kolbenfresserle: No dude. EVERYTHING is gone! Those were special shots in special places! Not your local park! I had to pay roughly 200 bucks for one, for the one I had a friendly teacher vouch for me.
This is not a "guys, I changed my mind for CookieCutters 3 lololol". This is a serious project that I fucked up!
xiam007: wow good luck 😂
Kolbenfresserle: Thanks for the empathy
| 5 | 0.4 | |
1669839378 | 1669879332 | t3_z91wzd | t5_2to41 | 38 | shiraah: TIFU by consoling a friend after breakup!
I (19F) am best friends with Myra (20F) and friends with her now ex bf, Pat (20M). Myra and Pat broke up around 5 months ago, at least that's what they told us. Ever since the break-up, I have no contacts with Pat, who was a friend and classmate of mine even before he got together with Myra.
A couple days ago, I got to know from another friend that Pat has not been very well and that he hinted on how Myra's friends just cut him off after the break-up despite being friends with him as well. Me being the stupid person I am thought to myself how wrong it was of me to abandon a friend just like that. (Me and Pat had good platonic relation where we used to share our problems with each other quite often).
Yesterday, feeling bad for my actions, I texted Pat asking him how he has been. He started complaining, talking depressive, things like 'nothing is good in life anymore' basically begging for sympathy for his break up and I tried to encourage him by reminding him all the good things about him and that things will get better soon; we were having a pure platonic talk and I am pretty sure I refered to him as "bhai" (brother) once or twice while texting as well.
Now, when I was sitting with my girlfriend (I am bi) received a text from Myra saying "Please spare Pat from your filthy flirting"; apparently Pat had texted her " Please ask (my name) to stop flirting with me". Now Myra, my supposed best friend of 5 years is slut shaming me and calling me "characterless" as well as throwing homophobic insults at me for flirting with Pat.
Worst part- my girlfriend read her text and thought I was cheating on her.
FML
Update- I let my gf go through the chat and she is very pissed at both Pat and Myra. She told me how neither of them are my friends, for the way they acted. Since I was too hurt and numb to argue back or convince Myra that nothing happened. My gf, from my phone, with my consent texted both of them to "F*ck off" and blocked them. She is the best thing in my life rn and really supportive through everything. I love her.
TL;DR
Tried consoling a friend after his breakup with my bestie. He bitched to bestie misunderstanding my consoling as flirting and now my so called bestie is slut shaming and throwing homophobic insults at me.
Worst part- my gf read besti's texts and now thinks I was cheating on her.
FML
Jumanjoke: Okay so you should tell Myra a few things in this order :
- You felt bad for Pat as he was still depressed after their breakup.
- You were not flirting, as you have a gf right now. You friendzoned him as clearly as possible by calling him "bhai".
- He probably texted Myra the "tell her to stop flirting" to make her jealous. It must have been a desperate and deplorable attempt to win her back somehow.
- Tell her you won't talk to him anymore, as he clearly is manipulating both of you.
- Myra should apologize for the slutshaming and the homophobic insults.
If she doesn't believe you, you can send her the conversation with Pat, and tell her to f*ck off until she apologize.
In the same time, you should tell this to Pat :
"Did you mistake my pity for interest ?
I was never interested in dating you, i considered you my friend, no more, no less.
You tried make Myra jealous, thanks to that i might loose my best friend, my girlfriendAND my reputation.
I want you to apologize to me, and to Myra for your pathetic behaviour.
Have a good life."
Then with your gf : she is an unfortunate casualty of Pat's manipulation. Tell her you only like/love her, and ask her if she wants to read the conversation. Whatever she choose, screen her the last message you sent to Pat.
Sorry this was long, hope this gives you ideas. Good luck.
I hope thinhs with your gf will get better, and i hope Myra will apologize.
shiraah: Thanks!!! I took your advice. Iet my gf go through the chat and she is helping me so much through this. My priority was to save my relation with my gf. I have given up on Myra as this is not the first time she has done something like this. Thanks!
Jumanjoke: I'm glad that helped. Still, checking your messages shouldn't become a habit, but it can help in last resort.
A healthy relationship needs boundaries, but given the circumstances, checking the convo was acceptable and necessary.
Yeah i guess you should give up on your friendship with Myra, but before that you should make it clear that you didn't flirt in order to prevent her from hurting your reputation. And make it clear to Pat too, so he may stop spreading the word that you flirt with him (he probably does this to make Myra jealous).
| 4 | 9.5 |
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