start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1357170525 | 1357183563 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | bejoe905: TIFU by losing my wedding ring
I had been called in to work a little earlier than usual this morning, but thankfully it was just work in one area just outside my house. Before people start wondering, I live on my boss's property. At some point between the time I rolled out of bed and when we left to go do our... | 3 | 11.666667 | |
1357166545 | 1357301404 | null | t5_2to41 | 296 | NippyBiscs: TIFU by yelling at a customer, with my pants around my ankles.
I work at a sandwich shop with one of my really good friends, so naturally we're faffing about the whole time.
It's about 9 in the morning, so I tell him I have to go to the bathroom, which he replies "I'm gonna kick the door open when you sta... | 4 | 74 | |
1357171606 | 1357192287 | null | t5_2to41 | 230 | The-Great-One: TIFU by accidentally breaking into someone's house
Well in actual fact this was on NYE.
It starts like all good stories, at a bar. As is common on NYE for a young person I drank an amount that would most likely be considered dangerous. At about 3:00 am I got a little tired, I proceed to inform my friend... | 6 | 38.333333 | |
1357177309 | 1357179564 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by making my friends break their bathroom door.
Okay Reddit, I don't normally drink, but when I do, I try to stick to shots of tequila. Its more affordable at the local bar and I hate carrying drinks around.
After my friends and I left the bar, we went back to their house and decided to make my sober ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1357181889 | 1357247443 | null | t5_2to41 | 54 | [deleted]: TIFU by stripping to nearly naked and climbing in to a hot guy's bed.
Met a pro sports team a while ago, hung out with a few of them before the incident below (specifically John and Mike). They have the bodies to boot and the personalities you imagine of jocks. My friend got hit on, as i am not the Sportman... | 6 | 9 | |
1357174575 | 1357190212 | null | t5_2to41 | 37 | NotADeathEater: TIFU by snubbing a little girl at the library.
I was in the checkout line, concentrating on balancing a massive stack of books on my thigh so that I could pull my library card out of my wallet. A little girl was running past the line and paused in front of me and said "You have pretty hair!" I was stil... | 4 | 9.25 | |
1357188987 | 1357238249 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,268 | Nottherightone: TIFU by making an ill-timed suicide joke.
So, for a long while I've been having suicidal thoughts. I mentioned how I wanted to kill myself to a friend, and he told my parents. Next thing I know, I'm in therapy. I've been going over my issues, and I'm not the greatest now, but I'm in a calmer place than ... | 9 | 140.888889 | |
1357199002 | 1357270895 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | BenSapphire2011: TIFU by getting less-than-friend zoned.
It was actually a little while ago, but that's besides the point.
There was this girl. I hated her so much. I would explain, but it would be hideously boring.
There was this other girl. She was fucking awesome. We were friends. I didn't like her 'in that way' q... | 3 | 3 | |
1357201756 | 1357262838 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | xXDiegoDestructionXx: TIFU by accidentally ordering Domino's
So I'm on my way home from running all my parent's errands for them, and then decide to bring home some pizza. hell, I earned it. I pull out my phone and ask it for Pizza Hut's number. Gives me a number, and I dial it. The employee did not say it was Dominos ... | 5 | 2.8 | |
1357193306 | 1357260744 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | catscreatelols: TIFU my hair.
It's on the verge of being classified as *too* long (I'd say 75cm, give or take a few) and I decided the use the short-tunneled blow dryer instead of the long one with the safety attachment. For some godforsaken reason, the back of this particular blow dryer has a metal mesh-like cap over ... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1357206883 | 1357225300 | null | t5_2to41 | 29 | lickmaddee: TIFU:By getting drunk and throwing up at school.
I just got the implusive feeling to get boozed at the most eventful time of the day just for the fun. So I took a heap of booze and drank it at lunch time. I wasn't expecting to get so badly hammered so I went to physical education for my last class. So I had... | 3 | 9.666667 | |
1357211898 | 1357294224 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: tifu by falling in love
I just don't care. why do we play these games with ourselves. I know exactly what I want but its never there. I don't have the patience required I guess. but you don't want to hear that. you want to hear about abby. or maybe Whitney? blonde or redhead? there are brunettes involve... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1357224025 | 1359044128 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | kittenbrr: TIFU by being a crazy girlfriend
Okay so it wasn't today it was last night, but I was not in the emotional place to post yesterday. So my boyfriend of over a year and a half was always kinda secretive about his phone, This always bothered me a little, so while he was in the shower I got curious and decided t... | 14 | 0.142857 | |
1357222540 | 1357264051 | null | t5_2to41 | 83 | herpderpthrowawayman: TIFU by watching porn in front my girlfriend last night
We're staying at this holiday house with her family. After getting her off, she wants to stop as she's uncomfortable after hearing family moving about upstairs, which my hour-engorged guy-brain isn't happy about. After waiting for her to go t... | 6 | 13.833333 | |
1357234360 | 1358130322 | null | t5_2to41 | 81 | ThrowawaySexchat: TIFU by ruining a girls life vie Omegle.
Okay. I was bored so I went on Omegle and added "sexchat" as an interest of mine. On my first spin, I wound up with a girl, who we will refer to as her/she. I offered her a Tits for Dick trade after finding out we are around same age. She accepted. We chatted f... | 7 | 11.571429 | |
1357243611 | 1357429075 | null | t5_2to41 | 653 | nashgasm: TIFU Ignoring a Stomach Ache
so over the past few days i have had a building stomach ache which i thought was just gas etc. it was mild discomfort really, nothing to worry about. or so i thought.
i had a date last night, it went swimmingly, even though my stomach hurt. i had another date scheduled for tonig... | 13 | 50.230769 | |
1357236020 | 1357403289 | null | t5_2to41 | 40 | Lily_Lackadaisy: TIFU: because I'm socially awkward
1. Someone greeted me by kissing my cheek (three times, that's how we roll in The Netherlands) and I thought to myself, I should dat too and ended up kissing the person's neck.
2. I ran into someone who had recently been to a funeral and I asked him "Was the funeral ... | 3 | 13.333333 | |
1357262161 | 1357268740 | null | t5_2to41 | 37 | snarkbomb: TIFU by losing a set of keys
Master keys to a facility where my employer is doing some remediation design. I've been heading up the field work so I've been keeping the keys on me. Showed up for a field visit this morning with my boss and a senior engineer, no keys. Last time I used them was 12/21, not a clue... | 4 | 9.25 | |
1357267434 | 1357385850 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | xmasterZx: TDIF by telling an acquaintance he lived in a slave house.
A little back story: Last year, I picked up my roommate from his parent's home in his home town and he wanted to show me around a bit. One of the things he showed me was a HUGE house ([this](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_WX2PTUuQiQs/TD-eMVlvuuI/AAAAAAAAB... | 4 | 6.5 | |
1357277477 | 1357291115 | null | t5_2to41 | 163 | [deleted]: TIFU by falling down the stairs and soiling myself.
Gather around comrades and let me tell you a tale of woe.
So I recently got back from Christmas break and had yet to unpack my bags, meaning to get across my tiny room I had to climb/leap over my luggage.
So not only 30 minutes ago I was calmly browsing Re... | 3 | 54.333333 | |
1357279705 | 1357297874 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by farting in front of my girlfriend
We were fooling around on the bed, and when I grabbed her side in an attempt to pull her on top of me, I let one rip.
onmelanchollyhill: Unless you shat yourself in the process I'm pretty sure you'll be okay.
loozerr: This is story changed the course of whole TIFU s... | 3 | 2 | |
1357280478 | 1357331955 | null | t5_2to41 | 454 | [deleted]: TIFU by keeping my phone while I was drunk
Last night actually- drinking this fine ass rum called The Kraken with a friend. There's nothing wrong with this so far.
There's also a girl at work who i've been interested in for awhile.
Also, nothing wrong with that.
So, five or seven drinks in I received a... | 7 | 64.857143 | |
1357284291 | 1357388162 | null | t5_2to41 | 30 | [deleted]: TIFU things with my ex and a good friend.
So right now I'm smoking through a pack of cigs to calm my nerves from realizing the gigantic degree of fucked up I have committed. Rewind to New Years, celebrating and being drunk as fuck with a couple of my friends (including a crush and an ex [let's call her M] t... | 5 | 6 | |
1357293371 | 1357429223 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | fireflygirl01: TIFU On the Military
I was in an improv class playing the part of a soldier, and when asked where I was stationed I replied 'Al Jazeera'.
Which is a television network.
lucian_black: You were at Al-Jazeera’s broadcasting facilities in Baghdad. Sorted!
fireflygirl01: Unfortunately I wasn't that quick-wit... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1357301366 | 1357713224 | null | t5_2to41 | 34 | butteryasfuck: TIFU two desserts.
Background: 1 stick of butter = 1/2 cup. Chocolate chip cookies require 1 cup of butter. Rice Krispy treats require 1/4 cup of butter.
I was craving a nice snack, so I decided to make chocolate chip cookies. The dough was coming out a little funny but I couldn't think why. It wasn't u... | 5 | 6.8 | |
1357323817 | 1357407253 | null | t5_2to41 | 48 | illdrawyourface: TIFU and ruined my inlaw's toaster oven.
So here I am making a sandwich, toasting the bread with cheesy goodness. I open the toaster door and suddenly realized my fatal mistake.
The sandwich bag was under the door.
No one knows I did it yet. How do I get melted plastic off a glass toaster oven door... | 5 | 9.6 | |
1357325264 | 1361666396 | null | t5_2to41 | 2,533 | digital_cake: TIFU by feeding my baby raisins
Babies little digestive systems apparently cant break down raisins. I learned this last night when I changed her diaper and noticed a couple of grapes in her diaper. Only they weren't grapes...they were raisins that were rehydrated with liquid shit.
After I fully understoo... | 17 | 149 | |
1357327803 | 1357330582 | null | t5_2to41 | -1 | dodli: TIFU by teaching a simple concept in an extraordinarily convoluted way
I work as a TA in my university, teaching math. Today i had to practice a certain concept they'd been taught by the instructor during the lecture earlier this week, a concept that is not easy to grasp. I decided to try and elucidate it using ... | 5 | -0.2 | |
1357329309 | 1357349754 | null | t5_2to41 | 41 | [deleted]: TIFU and passed out on the street.
Keriou's Drunk Installment's #2
Right, so welcome to my fail. Let's get started.
First, i'd like to mention i'm new to reddit but not to the internet. I swear to the authenticity of my stories as my life tends to sucks worse then being constipated at Disneyland (think ab... | 5 | 8.2 | |
1357340430 | 1357667758 | null | t5_2to41 | 29 | catpantalon: TIFU: Skin tags on gooch + dental floss
So recently I was browsing reddit and saw someone post how one way to get rid of skin tags is to tie dental floss around them. It cuts off oxygen until it dies basically and falls off.
About a month or 2 ago, I got what I thought was an ingrown hair right on my goo... | 6 | 4.833333 | |
1357344158 | 1357777029 | null | t5_2to41 | 134 | QuestionableOrigin: TIFU by flashing the whole Men's swim team
So today after swim practice I noticed I had a small tear in the crotch of my competition suit, there's a liner underneath so nothing was poking through or anything. So I decided to walk into the locker room and be like "Oh no, my suits ripped" and then pro... | 6 | 22.333333 | |
1357343382 | 1357460972 | null | t5_2to41 | 73 | njdeatheater: TIFU from both ends of my body. But I also joined the Reddit Family in full.
Well, I've finally become a full fledged member of the Reddit Community today via the act of.... shitting myself. No throwaway, because well for one, I am not very known, and two, after this my shame is quite lacking. I'm a 24/m.... | 5 | 14.6 | |
1357347171 | 1357373688 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU for sending accidently sending my teacher a dirty note.
So I had a science quiz and was pretty confident i would do well due to my previous excellence in science. I got a 50 on the quiz. I was really pissed, and our teacher was able to tell we were mad. She then said that we should thank her for the qui... | 3 | 2 | |
1357340427 | 1357759602 | null | t5_2to41 | 13 | novanerd: TIFU and cost myself most of my spending money for the month because I have a shitty attention span.
Pretty much in one afternoon after a long day of school, I realized that I forgot to return a DVD to Redbox for a month and now I have to pay $30 for a DVD I only watched half of. Then it gets worse. I'm in th... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1357352337 | 1357567609 | null | t5_2to41 | 52 | U_DUN_GOOFED: TIFU by trusting a flu fart.
TL;DR: Just to ahead and reset the counter...
So here I am, trying to recover from the funky funks and enjoying a wonderful cocktail of chicken broth and garlic croutons watching Alaskans yell at each other about gold. After my one and only meal of the day, I'm chilling in m... | 3 | 17.333333 | |
1357369782 | 1357524250 | null | t5_2to41 | 21 | RnRaintnoisepolution: TIFU by scratching a near mint vinyl album I just bought.
Earlier today(well technically yesterday, but it's after the last time I slept) I bought the album "Metal Health" by Quiet Riot, I played it once fine earlier but the accident happened the second time, I accidentaly dropped the needle on th... | 3 | 7 | |
1357407869 | 1357410570 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | [deleted]: Didn't take a lunch break and got written up.
alive_in_wonderland: I have no idea what you are saying.
SaraLaraJean: Yeah I couldn't understand them either..
| 3 | 5.333333 | |
1357412149 | 1357417237 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | thefreq: TIFU by biting my toe so hard that I started bleeding.
MidnightSlinks: I think we're going to need some back-story here...
[deleted]: I'm so ashamed to admit this, but it just sounded like a good idea to me. You know how some people bite their fingers? Well, I do that, but with my toes. And my fingers, but al... | 5 | 3.8 | |
1357409294 | 1357424413 | null | t5_2to41 | 590 | Dovanchester: TIFU by exploding my nose.
I work part time as a cashier. Last night it was becoming increasingly slow in the store and I was becoming increasingly lazier. At around 7:30, I was helping a customer when they requested a bag. As I take one off the rack, I feel a tickle on my nose and feel a sneeze coming on... | 5 | 118 | |
1357430205 | 1357449937 | null | t5_2to41 | 87 | tlf9888: TIFU by setting the smoke detectors off at 4:30 in the morning.
Well, last night I had quite a few drink and had stayed up all night because I couldn't sleep. Anyways, my husband asked me to make him these chicken bite things, similar to Buffalo Wild Wings Parmesan garlic boneless wings, to take to work for lu... | 3 | 29 | |
1357431446 | 1357477765 | null | t5_2to41 | 27 | Frogispice1: TIFU By going for a run without any water.
This morning was really hot, but I decided to go for a run anyway, since I have a triathlon coming up in a week. Anyway, I got to around the 4km mark and started to feel really dizzy and sick in the stomach, then I realised. Shit! I didnt bring water! To make matt... | 4 | 6.75 | |
1357448589 | 1357567988 | null | t5_2to41 | 69 | EgyptStar81: TIFU by shitting my SCHOOL-ISSUED pants
In advance i apologize for resetting the counter.
So today was a parade day for our school band and waddya know im in the band. This was only my second parade and the first was only 30 minutes this one was i shit you not TWO HOURS. When we first arrived I had a slig... | 7 | 9.857143 | |
1357454123 | 1357484925 | null | t5_2to41 | 44 | Dripsauce: TIFU and Krazy-glued my phone's case to the countertop.
Today I was sitting at home watching Archer. I took out my phone to check it, and realized that part of the phone's soft plastic case had torn. So me, always wanting to McGuyver everything, went and got the Krazy Glue and tried to glue the phone's case ... | 6 | 7.333333 | |
1357448353 | 1357514544 | null | t5_2to41 | 24 | Luc20: TIFU. I meant to send a girl a link from quickmeme.com, sent a link from /b/
The link contained a thread of Wincest pictures with the 'diabeetus' guy's face photoshopped on nearly all of them...
I was sharing originally it with my /b/tard friend who thought it was hilarious.
Batmans_Cumbox: Tell us her reaction.... | 6 | 4 | |
1357455737 | 1357484739 | null | t5_2to41 | 221 | TheLambaster: TIFU by getting drunk and going for a run
This happened a little while ago actually.
A little backdrop for this story. I'm on the club cross country team at Michigan State University. This year, our national meet was at Hershey, PA. Given the 10 hour drive, we left Friday morning and got back on Sunday n... | 6 | 36.833333 | |
1357472176 | 1357474649 | null | t5_2to41 | 66 | Smasherrr: TIFU by farting in my sleep in a room full of girls
This just happened about 40 minutes ago, I was at my friends house even there since about 8pm and we just smoke out, fast forward to about 4am and my friends brother and his boyfriend come home with a bunch of there girl friends. We end up drinking a bit an... | 3 | 22 | |
1357475256 | 1357615171 | null | t5_2to41 | 47 | yaypothead: TIFU by smashing my mother's laptop screen.
Well, here's the story. I was downloading something, and because the download needed 5+ hours to be completed, I decided that it would be a good idea to get some sleep. I put the laptop near the edge of my bed (yes stupid move, I know) and go to sleep on the other... | 4 | 11.75 | |
1357490680 | 1357529685 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU, but it was finishing a first fuck up
Last year I dated a girl for about 5 months, then she broke my heart and ended up leaving me. She more or less went to start dating a mutual friend, but that's not too relevant.
Anyway, I was hurting. Badly. But she was fine, moved on without any problems. So one ... | 4 | 2 | |
1357506290 | 1357690723 | t3_162emi | t5_2to41 | 89 | ATyp3: Story?
YaviMayan: He's a pilot who takes Xanax. What more is there?
l0ngballs: pilot is also butt naked, presumably when flying
akspa420: And he enjoys movies about gladiators
meatywood: And likes to hang out in men's locker rooms.
studio595: So, Tommy, have you ever been to a Turkish bath house?
gusset25: pri... | 12 | 7.416667 | |
1357496015 | 1357590477 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | Cyoot2boot: TIFU by seriously ruining a great night
TIFU
For a time last night, I was a hero. I am only 18 and my friends and I had plans to go to a house party last night however, those plans fell through. All of my friends were prepared to spend a night in bored until I said fuck that and planned a trip into Ybor. Th... | 6 | 5.166667 | |
1357502009 | 1357860705 | null | t5_2to41 | 321 | [deleted]: TIFU by misplacing my vibrator
So, I'm a teenage guy, and my boyfriend was staying over at my house, my parents completely oblivious to the fact that we were going out. We were out at the carnival, and missed dinner at the house, so we decided that when we got hungry we would get some pizza. Being randy teen... | 9 | 35.666667 | |
1357519727 | 1357578803 | null | t5_2to41 | 231 | Benjamanl: TIFU by farting during a blowjob
Cold, boring Sunday.
Laying in bed watching TV.
Girlfriend comes over.
She crawls into bed and goes under the covers.
Starts humming my shaft.
I'm still watching TV.
Forget she's there.
I let out a silent-but-deadly.
Dutch oven.
Girlfriend flips out.
Yells at me for disresp... | 6 | 38.5 | |
1357515011 | 1358362817 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | WoutervD: TIFU by swallowing a pop tab
Last night I was at work, and grabbed a can of coke. I have this weird habit of breaking the pop tab off of every can I drink, however this time it fell into the can. This happened before, so I didn't really think anything of it and just continued drinking. Until... GULP. I felt t... | 8 | 3.875 | |
1357512738 | 1357540346 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | TheFreakingBatman: TIFU by dropping my phone in a piss-filled toilet.
(This actually happened a few days ago, but whatever...)
Anyways, so I was over at my friend's house and I really had to take a piss. I went to the bathroom and as I was doing my business, I hear something fall in the toilet. Thinking "what the fuc... | 4 | 3 | |
1357540999 | 1357617960 | null | t5_2to41 | 64 | javi_intheair: TIFU by not checking if the condom had broke (NSFW i guess)
Pretty self-explanatory, having unusually amazing sex for a while. I constantly checked to see if it had broken due to the particular roughness of this session, but it remained in there. I felt myself about to cum and in the back of my head i th... | 8 | 8 | |
1357544251 | 1357596505 | null | t5_2to41 | 42 | bookfucker: TIFU by almost fucking a friend while she was wasted.
After a great night of entertainment and conversation, we go back to her place, we have a few drinks (mostly consumed by her), I put her to bed and start to go into the living room to sleep off my alcohol, then she grabs me and starts grinding me on her... | 10 | 4.2 | |
1357545736 | 1357612462 | null | t5_2to41 | 105 | [deleted]: TIFU by forgetting my wife's birthday and dragging her with me to buy a car.
TIFU big time by forgetting it was my wife's birthday today.
She said she wanted to stay home today, I said no. My car was broken down and I needed a replacement. My dad had only today off and I needed him to help me on the car in... | 4 | 26.25 | |
1357570596 | 1357682643 | t3_1646vk | t5_2to41 | 530 | vocalon: Beta is just an illusion.
"Beta" is having emotion.
"Beta" is liking people for who they are.
"Beta" is being in a relationship because you genuinely like the person, not because of their pussy.
There is no alpha, there is no beta. There is feeling, and unfeeling. Simple as that.
> Edit: Clarification... | 9 | 58.888889 | |
1357558705 | 1357568367 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | akdawg: By spitting a mouthful of Copenhagen on a little girls white puffy jacket. While she was wearing it!
Fidel204: What's Copenhagen
Prisonfishy: Chewing tobacco, friend.
Fidel204: I kinda figured. Thanks for clearing that up
| 4 | 2.5 | |
1357559106 | 1357630073 | null | t5_2to41 | 40 | [deleted]: TIFU by setting off the fire alarm in a retirement home...
I've done it again.
I work at a retirement home. I work from 10 pm till 6.
Theatrically people are trying to sleep.
At 3 this morning, I was making toast for a resident. A piece fell off and into the back, where it promptly began smoking. Soon aft... | 3 | 13.333333 | |
1357566864 | 1357610161 | null | t5_2to41 | 502 | [deleted]: TIFU by wearing ladies underwear [24m]
So I was visiting my friend out of of town for the weekend and everything was awesome except the fact I forgot to bring clean underwear. So, no big deal I just wear the same pair since I had JUST changed them so it was all good. However, after a weekend of drinking and ... | 7 | 71.714286 | |
1357567381 | 1357611840 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU by making everybody think I am a violence loving misogynist.
Today is my 2nd week in my new school(I do not live in America btw.) in a city I have just moved in. And i am a pretty quiet guy, often all by myself.
So we had to write some short stories and we got some good ones, some bad ones. But all of... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1357582109 | 1357602433 | null | t5_2to41 | 65 | wingman16: TIFU by eating extremely spicy wings
Ok, so my stomach doesn't like when I eat chicken wings. In fact, it usually makes me pay...a lot. So last night, I decided to go out with some buddies. We stopped at Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner. That was mistake #1. Mistake #2 was letting my buddies convince me to try ... | 6 | 10.833333 | |
1357583566 | 1357689825 | null | t5_2to41 | 36 | philelias: TIFU reminding my depresseed dad that he's unemployed
Little background here: long story short, my mom kicked my dad out this summer (I'm 17) for reasons that don't pertain to the story. He's physically disabled (broke both ankles) and very depressed. My dad was working at his buddy's auto shop doing compute... | 4 | 9 | |
1357609608 | 1357667433 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | darkrock: TIdnFU by pooping in the toilet, where I'm supposed to, but it was really, really close.
I didn't feel sick today, but I did have a couple of farts that I trusted coming home. Once in the house, I dropped off stuff in the kitchen, and announced: "I've got to poop."
I headed to the bathroom, and did a sli... | 4 | 0.5 | |
1357613906 | 1357658057 | null | t5_2to41 | 51 | DarkestBirds: TIFU by accidentally sending a text message
For a long while I've really liked this girl at my school. Over the last couple of months we've become pretty good friends. We've stayed up all night talking online, we've talked each other through horrible family dinners, and since we sit next to each other in ... | 5 | 10.2 | |
1357629027 | 1357673717 | null | t5_2to41 | 502 | drtbttn818: I slept with my friend's sister
NWnats14: You must now let him fuck your sister.
Charlzy99: Plot hole, there is no sister. :O
Clung: Then, he has to become the sister.
novanerd: Whoa
thatguyoverthere202: If he was a true bro he'd let you suck his dick a little.
Earlier_this_week: Why! Why ! Why did you p... | 10 | 50.2 | |
1357619445 | 1357704953 | null | t5_2to41 | 42 | [deleted]: TIFU- by pressuring a really close friend to date me.
Worst part... this is not the first time I do this.
My thoughts were that if we're great friends and close, why couldn't it work itself into something more, like a relationship? But he doesn't feel we'd be compatible.
I didn't read into anything, he neve... | 3 | 14 | |
1357639586 | 1357666305 | null | t5_2to41 | 65 | transparentfruitslav: TIFU :Green tea and piss are the same color...
So I am in my room redditing and all of a sudden I have to pee. Too lazy to leave my fortress and go downstairs I begin looking for something to piss in . I finally find an empty green tea bottle , I do my business put on the lid then place the bottle... | 3 | 21.666667 | |
1357641194 | 1357667922 | null | t5_2to41 | 64 | slash_k: TIFU by taking a shot glass full of MadDog357 hot sauce...
#fml
Fuck. I really mean fuck.
"You need to try it" etc etc.
Gets a shot glass, fills up, necks it, inserts finger to make sure I have the glass empty.
2 seconds later my mouth is on fire. Like hell fire.
My throat burns, my insides burn.
Idiot.
... | 8 | 8 | |
1357662867 | 1357677536 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,254 | Turbosky: TIFU by unknowingly wiping my ass with the back of my tee shirt.
So...I used to laugh at "the idiots" in tifu. Today I have joined the club with a delux membership. I am at home at this moment. I will go "back" to work and face a barrage of ball busting after I tell my tale....
So I had a few beers while wat... | 6 | 209 | |
1357666814 | 1357676140 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | [deleted]: TIFU by taking back an ex boyfriend.
I was dating this guy for like 9 months. I broke it off with him because there was so much more I wanted that he wasn't giving me. I was seeing someone else for the few months we were broken up. He just turned out to be an alcoholic gambler.. which made my ex look so good... | 4 | 5.5 | |
1357664859 | 1357711303 | null | t5_2to41 | 21 | [deleted]: TIFU By showing my recent ex who I'm working things out with my OkCupid account.
I showed it to him because he was using my phone and I figured that him seeing that and *not* reading my profile would be worse than showing it to him since I assume *he* would assume that I'm already hooking up with people (I'm... | 9 | 2.333333 | |
1357675055 | 1357777454 | null | t5_2to41 | 169 | SaintDanie: TIFU by trying to fart silently
First, I'll start off by saying I am a girl, this is important. I'm in French class and I reaaaaaally need to fart (come on, guys, we do it too) but my teacher is busy with another student to go up and ask her to use the ladies room. By now my stomach is getting the rumbly tu... | 7 | 24.142857 | |
1357675112 | 1357798832 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by attempting to record my conversation
I live in Ohio, where it is legal to record phone calls with the consent of one person in the conversation (me). I was using Google voice, and talking with someone, and the conversation started to touch on some sensitive topics. I got nervous about what they were ... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1357685308 | 1357736681 | null | t5_2to41 | 625 | oiledbathtub: Today I fucked up my roommates face.
I've had a pretty bad couple weeks.
And today was a great day to just relax, so, naturally I took a long steamy shower and decided to masturbate. Normally I'm a dry guy, but today I decide to try out the feels with some Olive Oil.
That might have been the end o... | 7 | 89.285714 | |
1357686296 | 1357696916 | null | t5_2to41 | 30 | [deleted]: TIFU by reading reddit poop comments while my boyfriend was in the bathroom.
Spent the day having a Netflix marathon and pigging out on fast food and cookies with my boyfriend. Hours into in, he pauses the tv to go take a shit, making comments on his way to the bathroom about how I'm a "freak of nature."
For... | 10 | 3 | |
1357692255 | 1357756838 | null | t5_2to41 | 71 | [deleted]: TIFU and shat myself..3 times.
So today I had a day off from work, and I haven't really browsed reddit in a while so I decided to get some lunch and just chill out.
So I go on down to taco bell, get a bunch of those supreme tacos, and then I go home and browse reddit for a half hour. I've finished my tacos,... | 4 | 17.75 | |
1357693258 | 1357777729 | null | t5_2to41 | 280 | [deleted]: TIFU, by accidentally asking my dr to fuck me.
Today I went to a consultation with an ophthalmologist since I am considering getting LASIK. He was taking a particularly long time to "refract me" (check the refraction of my eyes)
Him "Sorry for being so anal"
Me "No problem, ANAL ME UP"
It just slipped out.... | 10 | 28 | |
1357691327 | 1357778872 | null | t5_2to41 | 20 | cyberaltair: TIFU by erasing my dads phone
My dad has been using ios 4.shit on his iPhone 3GS since forever and whatsapp stopped working sometime last month and after being bothered everyday since then I decided to update his phone and install that damn thing. It all goes fine until after I install the program I realiz... | 6 | 3.333333 | |
1357695889 | 1358200191 | null | t5_2to41 | 29 | TDIFU: TMI situation or how I got my dildo cleaned
So I was house-sitting once (it's when somebody with a fancy house leaves on a vacation and asks you to stay at their place, water their flowers, dust their silver spoon collection and what not).
2 weeks into it, I got pretty comfy, and, when getting ready for work i... | 8 | 3.625 | |
1357716738 | 1357762723 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | Kameko4Real: TIFU, I Cannot Believe I told him that....
So my boyfriend and i have been together for almost two years and a little over a year ago we broke up for a couple weeks. During that time i met someone who i just saw this weekend. Well he's very attractive and such and so I was talking to him and made the mista... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1357722554 | 1357847999 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | thuddy1855: TIFU by calling a girl I like fat
I was skyping with this girl I like and her friend for a couple hours before just talking on the phone with both of them. I was looking through my facebook and came across a picture of Jessica Simpson over the years and her weight gain. I said "whoah Jessica Simpson sure ... | 6 | 5.5 | |
1357743509 | 1357810977 | null | t5_2to41 | 3,922 | [deleted]: TIFU: Didn't listen to the doctor and forced...
So, this happened two weeks ago, but I'm only getting out of the hospital yesterday.
Here goes, with a throwaway cause you'll see..
Here I am, day 6, the pipes are clogged, not even gas is able to escape this. Doctor (on day 5) said to take some laxatives, no... | 12 | 326.833333 | |
1357748665 | 1357851789 | null | t5_2to41 | 307 | [deleted]: TIFU and got the worst handjob ever from my cat.
I'm wearing gym shorts today, as I just woke up and wore them to bed. On these shorts there is a drawstring that hangs out over the front. For some reason this one is oddly long. It hangs perfectly to the very end of my cock tip.
My cat is still a baby and he... | 6 | 51.166667 | |
1357747941 | 1357809554 | null | t5_2to41 | 60 | ANUS_CONE: TIFU: I did something unspeakably horrible (xpost from r/confession)
I have to get this off my chest. Only my best friend knows about this, because he was there when the event happened. I'll start with a little background information:
I was extremely athletic in high school. I played football (I was actuall... | 4 | 15 | |
1357752452 | 1357762994 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | DrShio: FREE Depends Real Fit Underwear (x-post from /r/freebies, figured TIFU would find these useful)
ikma: TIFU by passing on such a great deal!
DrShio: TIFU morally by resorting to karmajacking
| 3 | 8.666667 | |
1357756189 | 1357763695 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | GeekyCivic: TIFU and had a salad dressed with Ranch and Iced Tea for lunch
I wasn't paying attention and poured my Iced Tea into my bowl of salad instead of my glass. Interesting taste, that's for sure.
JamesStabsGames: That.. really doesn't sound bad..
GeekyCivic: It wasn't... after I strained out most of the Iced Tea... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1357761237 | 1357848493 | null | t5_2to41 | 95 | DontShaveEverything: TIFU by shaving my ass
Prolouge:
Some of you may have ran into the posting of a young man that lived through the agony of shaving the hairs on his ass some time ago. I only ran across that post after having tried it myself and wanting to see if there was some way to get over the agony and utter de... | 4 | 23.75 | |
1357763370 | 1357771209 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU: Lost a girl who would've changed my life...
I just need to get this off my chest and frankly Reddit is the place I know someone might listen and might have something helpful to say.
My relationship of two years was falling apart day by day, fight by fight. The girl was a bitch but she was also a reall... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1357771304 | 1357799366 | null | t5_2to41 | 40 | [deleted]: TIFU by just realizing I may have lost the love of my life for good.
It all started about two months ago. I had been with my girlfriend since the beginning of college (roughly 2 years). We were pretty serious and had major plans for the future that we were very excited about, like spending our first thanksgi... | 3 | 13.333333 | |
1357774318 | 1357848384 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | ampedd_up: TIFU by buying $270 worth of contacts that I can't even wear
I went to get my eyes checked out about a week ago at Cohen's Fashion Optical and it turns out I have slight astigmatism, -0.75 cycle. They didn't have any glasses I liked so I decided to give contacts a shot. They tell me that I could buy various ... | 6 | 2.666667 | |
1357779441 | 1358137829 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | HSOWA: TIFU: Made the girl I like cry
Brief summary of the situation: I am a junior, she is a freshman. I am in a leadership position in junior ROTC (high school military program), and I go in her class to help the freshmen.
Today we were marching the freshmen around, and I was teaching them how to lead by getting eac... | 5 | 1 | |
1357784089 | 1357881195 | null | t5_2to41 | 131 | tantricorgasm: TIFU by drunkenly skeeting on my girlfriend's disabled mother
Yesterday night, I fucked up in one of the worst ways possible.
First, some back story: my girlfriend is now the primary caregiver of her mother after her mother had suffered a fairly severe stroke that has left her paralyzed on the left side... | 9 | 14.555556 | |
1357789296 | 1357792562 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU: Spent 4 hours revising for an exam, image of type of questions asked attached.
The sort of questions asked
http://imgur.com/MlIuS.jpg
T.T 4 hours wasted
mastermeatlock: A. It's A.
laosimerah: I think it's D...
mastermeatlock: Damnit, re-reading it you're right. Tools must always be polished and in... | 4 | 3.5 | |
1357788730 | 1357874755 | null | t5_2to41 | 41 | stonebridge33: TIFU by putting weed in the wrong car...
So today I picked up a nice half ounce of dank. After acquiring this package I decided to go ahead and sell a few grams so I could get some money back. So I called up my friend Kyle to see if he was interested. He, of course, was very interested. Unfortunately he ... | 6 | 6.833333 | |
1357785275 | 1357840329 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | steph1cleveland: TIFU by not making sure the bathroom door was shut all the way.
So there I was taking care of business when one of the cats decides to push her way in and see whats up which at first I don't think much of. Until she comes up to me looking like she is about to rub up against my leg.....but no she decide... | 3 | 10.333333 | |
1357797988 | 1357855980 | null | t5_2to41 | 27 | therealsdf: TIFU With A Mailbox.
This happened about 3 months ago.
I was at my friends house usual Halo and Cheez-Itz routine, when he decide the weather is nice. And suggests we go out and throw the football.
Mind you I am enjoying being lazy and really not wanting to lift my lazy ass from the couch, but after some... | 6 | 4.5 | |
1357826962 | 1357846265 | null | t5_2to41 | 172 | TapPrancer: TIFU by texting the wrong person.
We had a manager at my work who was worse than useless, he was universally hated to work with as he was that bad, he was a nice enough guy, just really fucking lazy.
One day he was giving me a lift into town and he told me he was leaving, inside I was jumping for joy. He dr... | 4 | 43 | |
1357817630 | 1357829477 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | peeinmyblackeyes: TIFU: I am not a smart man
Today I was running late trying to get out of my house to work. I knew i had to bring something for lunch during my 10 hour shift but I didn't have time to make the sandwiches I had planned on preparing before I left.
So I did what any responsible fat person would do and j... | 5 | 2.4 |
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