start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1359508096 | 1359533352 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | [deleted]: TIFU By running out of heating oil........... again
If this was my first, second or perhaps my third time doing this I wouldn't be so ashamed. Unfortunately its the third time THIS YEAR. I woke up this morning to a cold as fuck house and an empty tank. Due to my embarrasment I refuse to tell the oil company ... | 4 | 5.5 | |
1359545069 | 1359547961 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by admitting to everyone on my Facebook that I'm a virgin.
Title says it all.
Basically someone compared losing their virginity to losing their phone, and how we care about Technology too much.
I replied: "Probably because almost every kid in this fucked up world lost their virginity at 12 years."
To... | 6 | 0.666667 | |
1359514299 | 1359560697 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | RogueStardust: TIFU at the San Jose Sharks game
TIFU at the San Jose Sharks game by flipping my boyfriend's hat around so that it was backwards. When he proceeded to flip it around, I said (very loudly) "Oh, you're not going to be that Douchebag with the hat backwards?!" I then looked down at the people diagonal to us... | 3 | 2 | |
1359565969 | 1359650585 | null | t5_2to41 | 914 | RyCohSuave: TIFU by blasting porn in my office.
The lights were off in my room after playing a game of League of Legends with my friends, last night. After losing (it was close), I told my pals that I'd be calling it for the night. Some agreed, some stayed online - yet, I knew that my schedule for the rest of the night... | 8 | 114.25 | |
1359571534 | 1359603104 | null | t5_2to41 | 123 | WhiteRabbit13: TIFU: I ruined my brand new phone, by spitting on it
I was brushing my teeth and decided to text my SO about something. I was holding the phone in front of my face and subconsciously spit when i was done brushing, right onto the screen.
But it doesn't end there. I started to panic and then dunked my pho... | 8 | 15.375 | |
1359579567 | 1359588186 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | lshabowco: Just machine washed my iphone
I put it in my pocket while walking home from the gym, forgot about it, thought my gym kit could use a wash and....yeah. But wait! There's more! This is the third time I have had to pay for it to be fixed. First time for water damage (dropped it down the toilet) second for smash... | 5 | 1.4 | |
1359580998 | 1359605617 | null | t5_2to41 | 64 | BrianDangerMcViolenc: TIFU chatting up a girl on the bus
I fucked up bad, I didn't shit myself but still really bad. I just couldn't seem to catch a break today; I’d had a poor day with my dad again, realised that I might be late for college (English College I live with my parents). it was starting at 4PM today so I w... | 6 | 10.666667 | |
1359584734 | 1359637837 | null | t5_2to41 | 109 | snapchatsandtattoos: TIFU by ruining my shoes with mouse brain.
I left my shoes in the gym and brought them home in my bag. I never really wear them because they're slippers and I'm mostly in tennis shoes. Woke up this morning at 7 a.m. and was going to practice when I realized I was barefoot- why not just put on my sl... | 5 | 21.8 | |
1359592114 | 1359652194 | null | t5_2to41 | 944 | baldgrant: TIFU by macing myself twice
As the title suggests I maced myself twice today and neither time was on purpose. My father is a police officer and I had always been curious about the mace can on his duty belt. So today when he and my mother were out I got the mace can off of his belt and meaning to spray a bit ... | 5 | 188.8 | |
1359592012 | 1359724016 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | blobber109: [Not a TIFU, just an observation] Are all the fuck ups on here done by Brits?
Fairly well spoken ones at that. I hope I never have to contribute to this sr but seeing as I am also British it must be an inevitability.
[deleted]: What is it exactly that tips you off to it being Brits? The way it is worded?
bl... | 4 | 2 | |
1359595898 | 1359718207 | null | t5_2to41 | 691 | EyeStartledTheWitch: TIFU by wearing a tank top to the gas station
I was in a hurry threw on some pants, and the first shirt I could grab, which ended up being a loose tank top. Keep in mind, I don't have the biggest boobs. So I pulled into the gas station, and the man asked me how much I told him 20.00. As he walked a... | 11 | 62.818182 | |
1359595563 | 1359677984 | null | t5_2to41 | 95 | Winter_S: TIFU by laughing at my grandfathers funeral.
So I'm in the church, and standing in the Pew next to my brother when our 21 year old cousin stands next to us. He says to me quietly "I'm not going to sing, mainly because I can't. I would if I could though."
I respond with "oh, that's okay" and we continue stand... | 4 | 23.75 | |
1359602358 | 1359606476 | null | t5_2to41 | 28 | [deleted]: TIFU I ruined a $400.00 Alexander McQueen scarf within 10 minuets of buying it.
TIFU I bought a $400.00 Alexander McQueen scarf, brought it home, tried it on with a cheap hoodie. Scarf is now entangled in the zipper. I can't tell my friends because I don't want them to know I ruined that expensive scarf. Any... | 3 | 9.333333 | |
1359603085 | 1360336368 | null | t5_2to41 | 42 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling a police officer to go away
Work, tired as all hell after a twelve-hour work day previous and half my usual amount of sleep, running off a sip of caffeine. I'm working the till of a certain Canadian coffee-and-donut shop that's pretty well known for absurdly friendly service. Two hours from t... | 6 | 7 | |
1359602863 | 1359665615 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | crypticblizzard: TIFU by raging at my best friends.
Well, not today, about a week ago.
A little backstory.
Person A, I met him at a concert, fast forward one year, I was his best friend and helped him through his tough times.
Person B, I met on Facebook, hang out when we have time with person A, have some drinks and... | 7 | 1.285714 | |
1359607466 | 1359686088 | null | t5_2to41 | 81 | MarriottPoopStory: TIFU Pooping In Marriott Lobby
First off this is an old story, happened about 4 years ago when I was 16, but my cousin always brings it up and he thought I should post it here so here it goes.
So, 4 years ago my family and I took a road-trip to a wedding that was about 5 hours away. I went with my c... | 5 | 16.2 | |
1359611849 | 1359667227 | null | t5_2to41 | 66 | viperex170: [Suggestion] Make the counter count hours instead of days.
This would make it a lot more interesting IMO
Levait: The counter is fake guys. One of the mods once changed it to 1 but it doesn't really work.
JamesStabsGames: True, it's just a picture.. but we can try!!
Levait: With the power of our minds comb... | 10 | 6.6 | |
1359619947 | 1359625818 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | full_of_awe: TIFU I shoved a dildo up my SO ass
I was giving her quite the giving with our favourite dildo, I managed to slip on re entry and got the wrong hole.
Daiephir: Haha, more details, what was her reaction?
full_of_awe: A loud scream, followed by a punch to my stomach... Then tears
Daiephir: Yeah ... she defin... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1359616046 | 1359727010 | null | t5_2to41 | 74 | Taciturn_desultory: Tifu by reading reddit for too long.
I was using my galaxy tablet reddit app as a newspaper while I was dropping the kids off at the pool, for those who might not get the last half of the last line, I was taking a dump. I got so tuned into reading all sorts of stuff from the front page that a good l... | 9 | 8.222222 | |
1359620770 | 1359644884 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | lordriffington: TIFU by forgetting to cook the bacon.
Made fettucine carbonara for my parents, but forgot to cook the bacon before I added it. It was still edible, but nowhere near as good as it should have been.
BabyFetusMuncher: Nearly as bad as shitting yourself.
lordriffington: I'd almost rather shit myself than e... | 5 | 1 | |
1359633928 | 1360063420 | null | t5_2to41 | 578 | Engineer_Man: TIFU by being TOO honest with my wife.
I usually have the end of day run down with my wife and kids at the dinner table, a time to catch up on what happened in their day. Normally it consists of my wife complaining about things at her work, my son replying "I don't know" to questions about what he did at ... | 17 | 34 | |
1359655318 | 1359830244 | null | t5_2to41 | 2,924 | hogtiemydignity: TIFU by spilling bondage equipment all over my math class
Throwaway for decent enough reasons.
Last weekend I went to visit my girlfriend of about 4 years. We've spent the last year getting pretty into bondage, so when I went I brought a few of our toys from my place in my school backpack. When I left... | 12 | 243.666667 | |
1359664048 | 1359675750 | null | t5_2to41 | 66 | Digikaze: TIFU By spraying leather waterproofing on my arm pits
TIFU by spraying leather waterproofing on my armpits. Woke up this morning, went and took a shower before work, got out, dried off, grabbed the "black can of deodorant" sprayed armpits thoroughly and realized immediately something was wrong. The burning st... | 4 | 16.5 | |
1359664966 | 1359736756 | null | t5_2to41 | 81 | HeadsOrTailsIWin: I tried to hand him the dollar and he was like, "No, no, man, it's OK...."
When I went to the grocery today there was a guy in a ripped-up blue parka standing out front. "Can you help a homeless man?" he asked. I walked right past him.
On the way out there he was again. "Help for the homeless?" I ign... | 5 | 16.2 | |
1359663007 | 1359724891 | null | t5_2to41 | 93 | DudeManBr0: TIFU by taking a nap during what I THOUGHT was a free period but was actually a class I was supposed to be teaching.
So the school at which I am employed uses a rotating schedule wherein classes rotate one period later every day. Yesterday I taught a class during 4th period and so today that class was supp... | 6 | 15.5 | |
1359668740 | 1359734131 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | [deleted]: TIFU by breaking a friendship in a moment of depression.
Today, for some reason. I don't know why, I decided to end a friendship. The girl I ended the friendship was probably one of the nicest, most beautiful person in terms of both looks and personality I have ever known. She was there for me when I was de... | 7 | 3.714286 | |
1359661634 | 1359692021 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | techman993: TIFU by opening by big mouth.
First time posting in this subreddit, but here goes nothing. So on Saturday, I went on a blind double date with my best friend, his girlfriend, and one of her friends. Me and my date come from a similar background of bad breakups and we were both finally ready to start dating... | 5 | 0.8 | |
1359671033 | 1359700131 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | my-throwaway384928: TIFU by sending the "Internet Tough Guy Copypasta" to someone who called the police.
My friend and I pretended I lost my phone. We texted another friend of ours, and then sent her the copypasta.
Pretending I lost my phone and "pranking" the girl was his idea. Copypasta was mine.
I was notified in ... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1359672338 | 1359738278 | null | t5_2to41 | 42 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidently ejaculating all over my keyboard, monitor, and everywhere else on my desk. Story inside.
I came home from seeing a girl I really like. We teased each other all night. Hours and hours. All night till 5am for when I usually get up for work. I had to leave for home and was not going anywh... | 5 | 8.4 | |
1359659917 | 1360393575 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | nathan_white: TIFU by breaking my motorcycle while working on it.
So I was given a upgraded rear suspension unit for my bike the other day (hell yes!) The last couple of days have been fiddling around getting it installed and working correctly .
So today I see two washers leftover on the workbench. They, I thought wer... | 6 | 2 | |
1359677993 | 1359741131 | null | t5_2to41 | 73 | TimesWasting: TIFU by not looking at a hot girl
I was walking out of walmart, and it was decently crowed, a few people going in and coming out. As I walked out, I saw a really attractive woman walking across my field of vision from left to right, wearing a short skirt and high heels. I only saw her once in that initia... | 5 | 14.6 | |
1359679005 | 1359733007 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | ifailatmassage: TIFU by getting a massive erection during a massage.
So I have a really hot massage therapist. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't keep going to her if she weren't really good and skilled at what she does, but I also happen to think that she's really freaking gorgeous.
As a *result* of her being hot and my ... | 5 | 10 | |
1359660431 | 1359906774 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | DudeItsDev: TIFU by breaking my dads bong bowl.
A frient and I were doing what frients do. Well since our location was sketch we were on high alert. About halfway through the session my dad gets home. Thats when shit got real. My frient had already cleaned everything up except for the bong. So I snagged it and ducked m... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1359680741 | 1359732562 | null | t5_2to41 | 312 | [deleted]: TIFU by giving myself a facial (NSFW)
I'm in a long distance relationship and though we've been Skyping frequently and otherwise showing each other our junk via webcam, last night was the first time we tried to really have Skype-sex (aka mutual masturbation via Internet). I should also mention that she'd bee... | 3 | 104 | |
1359683335 | 1359754150 | null | t5_2to41 | 182 | MurielDaylight: TIFU by losing my pants and lactating in public
I was at Babies'r'Us picking up some of the furniture for my son's nursery, very pregnant. I was wearing maternity jeans that went under my belly, not over, which was my first mistake because I have no ass.
So there I was, in the middle of a busy stor... | 8 | 22.75 | |
1359684534 | 1360176655 | null | t5_2to41 | 115 | TheFrankTrain: TIFU by hooking up with a girl and not wearing underwear (with public indecency special feature!)
This actually happened about a year ago.
This is the story of why I started wearing underwear again. Why I had stopped to begin with is beyond the scope of this tale.
It was fall semester, senior year, a ... | 5 | 23 | |
1359688172 | 1359739428 | null | t5_2to41 | 53 | vociferus: TIFU by pissing myself in my boss' car.
After work today , myself and some colleagues went out for a few drinks. Afterwards, one of my (sober) supervisors offered to drive me 1 hour home. During the ride, we had some great conversation, but nearing the end of the ride, I really needed to use the bathroom. I ... | 4 | 13.25 | |
1359683886 | 1359700518 | null | t5_2to41 | 13 | LimpPlacenta: TIFU by clicking on a racist link in class
Well today in history class we were talking about English Imperialism and how some statements of senators were really racist. Thinking I would be funny reading this website WhiteMilkPower.com in front of my friend I brought it up and started reading. Being the id... | 3 | 4.333333 | |
1359705898 | 1359707227 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | WPEO: TIFU by not sleeping
As of late, my sleep schedule has been super wonky. I mean that in I generally go to bed around 4 and I often have work or class at 7 or 8 am. I'm sick of being a half a zombie anymore, so I stayed up the entire night last night and went through my day (one accidental nap less than an hour ... | 4 | 3 | |
1359698194 | 1359881854 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | Rubius0: TIFU: You know you spend too much time online if you try to use your mouse to scroll down when you get to the end of a page in the hardcover book you are reading.
JamesStabsGames: Wrong subreddit i'd guess.
definitely_a_human: I'm not wrong.
JamesStabsGames: I think OP is though.
definitely_a_human: My mam an... | 11 | 1.090909 | |
1359663375 | 1360547585 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | blasikyle: TIFU by missing a job interview oppurtunity
I received a voice mail to go online and finish my application for the royal bank of scotland, as there were only a few application slots left. I received the message at around 11 am this morning. I went back online and finished the application around 12 pm, stoppi... | 3 | 3 | |
1359726174 | 1360046285 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | nicko68: TIFU pulling out my video card
I had no idea PCI-E slots had a plastic retaining clip holding in the video card. I unscrewed it, tried to pull it out and it wouldn't come out. I couldn't see what was going on thanks to the giant heat sink. Kept pulling (which I knew was wrong but I was frustrated) and snap! Ca... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1359734566 | 1359767797 | null | t5_2to41 | 499 | Sir_Dude: TIFU by causing a gas leak and an evacuation.
This actually happened about 10 years ago, but my parents keep reminding me about it, so I figure it is worth a post.
Back in 2002, I was taking a summer school class on sign language (I wear hearing aids). The class was offered at University of Wisconsin Milwuke... | 10 | 49.9 | |
1359740552 | 1359776350 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,062 | ella1993: TIFU by making a stupid bet with a guy I barely know and now I have to clean his apartment in the nude.
[Update here](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/17vta5/tifupdate_tifu_by_making_a_stupid_bet_with_a_guy/).
So there's this guy I'll call Roger who is a regular at a coffee shop I go to quite a bit. Rog... | 10 | 106.2 | |
1359734568 | 1359793994 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | weezierocks: TIFU: By fainting in public
Technically it was last night. I fainted in public...again. I knew it might happen so I attempted to find a chair. Still passed out, face to the floor. Woke up from a "dream" to blood pouring out of my face from everywhere, on the floor of a famous art gallery. Managed to almo... | 5 | 3.4 | |
1359754025 | 1359838524 | null | t5_2to41 | 826 | nylon_carpet: TIFU by laughing during a video about starving children.
So today in class we are watching some video about a viola player, when a nervous looking girl comes in. Our school is doing a fundraiser for starving children. So she starts her presentation with a badly made video and everything is going fine.
S... | 8 | 103.25 | |
1359759902 | 1359760795 | null | t5_2to41 | 78 | smallsemple: TIFU by pushing a shit so hard it gave me a nosebleed.
BabyFetusMuncher: I like the part where you gave us some detail about the story.
smallsemple: There really isn't any more detail give. I pushed too hard, my nose started bleeding... a lot.
BabyFetusMuncher: Fair enough
| 4 | 19.5 | |
1359766951 | 1360006000 | null | t5_2to41 | 57 | sillyasswench: TIFU by telling my fiance that women "always say your penis is big whether it is or not."
Actually it was over 2 weeks ago but I'm still feeling the consequences. We were having some cocktails at home and I don't even remember saying it; however, the next morning he seemed positively heartbroken as he t... | 8 | 7.125 | |
1359768464 | 1359781170 | null | t5_2to41 | 252 | MrWiggles2: TIFU by possibly sending my boss dick pics.
So, late last year I started working with a new company as a sort of trainee to take over my direct boss' position when he decides to retire. A couple months later (before Christmas) he bought himself the iphone5 and gave me his old iphone4 so I would have all of... | 3 | 84 | |
1359776209 | 1360017858 | null | t5_2to41 | 53 | Th3Whiz: TIFU by not realizing a girl was flirting.
I was at a friend's birthday party, and we were all just hanging out playing some guitar. There was only one at the party, so it was just sort of getting passed around to all the people who play. My turn comes, and I start off with Wonderwall, bitches love Wonderwall... | 6 | 8.833333 | |
1359783191 | 1360001534 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | redd_hott: TIFU right before i got an interview..
Well today after being unemployed for about 3 years i stubbed my ridiculously ingrown toenail. It looks like a horn growing on my big toe. SO i decided to ask my friend for a couple of his painkillers and took them since the throbbing wouldn't stop. Then about an hour l... | 7 | 2.714286 | |
1359797909 | 1359800888 | null | t5_2to41 | 28 | [deleted]: TIFU by walking around all day with cum in my hair.
So earlier in the day, my boyfriend and I decided to partake in the sexy times, which ended in him...ahem...finishing on my face. We cleaned up and went about our daily business. I worked a full shift, shopped, went to a movie with said boyfriend and friend... | 4 | 7 | |
1359803476 | 1359805050 | null | t5_2to41 | 131 | greenbowl: TIFU by being an asshole on a date
It was date night. Everyone took a date and pregamed at someone's house. Drank too much, and we all went to a sushi place.
I wanted to get to know her better by asking ice breaker questions, but was too drunk to remember anything. So apparently she told me I keptasking her... | 3 | 43.666667 | |
1359831177 | 1359869505 | null | t5_2to41 | 582 | caques: TIFU by sneaking onto a hotel rooftop with my girlfriend and then breaking my ass.
My friend was in town the other day who stays at the hotel directly across the street from my apartment. My girlfriend had come over and we went across to say hello and have some drinks. After closing down the bar, we went with ... | 12 | 48.5 | |
1359832745 | 1360005153 | null | t5_2to41 | 76 | SamLenz: TIFU by vomiting on my laptop
I had just come home from a big night out. As a precaution I put a bucket next to my bed just incase I felt like I was going to be sick during the night.
Several hours later I wake up, lean over the side of my bed and grab the hard object on the floor (I thought it was my bucke... | 4 | 19 | |
1359833054 | 1359834233 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | dhsgunner: I see your starving child FU and give you my Special Education FU
In High school freshman year i was sitting in health class listening to the teacher lecture. the health class was located in the same building as the special education classes. Well needless to say a wondering special needs student mistakenly ... | 4 | 7.75 | |
1359833019 | 1359848658 | null | t5_2to41 | 11 | [deleted]: TIFU by letting an abusive relationship continue for 8 months
Obviously this is more like 8 months ago I fucked up, but that is neither here nor there.
To summarize, we met at the end of last May (the 27th) and were instantly attracted to eachother. That week we had sex, and the first time was terrible (she... | 5 | 2.2 | |
1359836481 | 1359885364 | null | t5_2to41 | 250 | [deleted]: TIFU and I sent my gf flowers with my ex gfs name on them.
I was on the phone with my ex gf while I was ordering flowers for my current gf and I completely did not realize this until I sent a text to my gf asking her if she received my gift. She simply replied: Enjoy the Superbowl because after that you're g... | 6 | 41.666667 | |
1359836821 | 1359844437 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by letting my best friend's recent ex kiss me..while she was a few feet away.
Yesterday, there was a regional swim meet that my best friend and I qualified for, so we went (duh), and just so happens that her boyfriend from our cross-town rival's school went too. So, being the cheap school system we are,... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1359839771 | 1359869291 | null | t5_2to41 | 21 | [deleted]: TIFU by unintentionallly insulting a friend of mine.
So some background: my friend, let's just call him X, grew up with divorced parents. I am known to dislike kids.
So X is talking about how he hates this one teacher in school. He says that the only reason why he wouldn't wish her dead is that she has lit... | 3 | 7 | |
1359823274 | 1360005359 | null | t5_2to41 | 54 | Need_More_Dinosaur: TIFU by shitting myself on my neighbours lawn
It was my bucks night... shat myself after walking from a cab, on my neighbours front lawn at 3 am then proceeded to try and get into my house dripping shit from my ass while my pants were around my ankles.... then had to throw out my pants and clean mys... | 5 | 10.8 | |
1359844840 | 1359888451 | null | t5_2to41 | 153 | [deleted]: TIFU by putting instant noodles in the microwave and forgetting to add water.
the (plastic?) container burnt completely and i got a good waft of chemical-smelling smoke. had to scramble together all the fans i own and open all my windows and doors and it's -5 degrees C. my apartment still stinks hours after ... | 4 | 38.25 | |
1359842415 | 1359910162 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | throwawayyyyyy_: TIFU by thinking my friend was going to suicide
TIFU!
Throwaway.
Last night I crushed a lot of medicine into powder to commit suicide myself. I mixed the powder with water and drank it all. Before this I was texting the girl I love and I sort of hinted at it in my last text to her. I vomited a lot th... | 5 | 1 | |
1359857155 | 1359877072 | null | t5_2to41 | 79 | Identify_the_feel: TIFU and gave the pizza delivery guy a 19 dollar tip.
He comes to the door, pizza is 31 bucks, I hand him 50, take the pizza and close the door. I meant to tip the guy 7 bucks, so it was a great fuck up for him. Pizza was tasty though.
*Edit, removed "accidentally", I knew I handed him 50 dollars b... | 5 | 15.8 | |
1359865259 | 1359906807 | null | t5_2to41 | 68 | Locrian_DM: TIFU by making sure the counter stayed at 0000
In a Walgreens, while picking up Advil for a raging headache and what seems to be a mild case of the chills. I was at the front counter and began running my credit card for the advil and breath mints (I had just eaten Sushi). I go to let out a little far (sur... | 4 | 17 | |
1359870383 | 1359950719 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | yarnybarny: TIFU by playing with a catfish
In my excitement I went to fuck around with a palm-sized catfish my friend's dad caught so that I can scare my friend's niece and nephews, and it fucking stabbed me with its venomous spike. 2 minutes later I've got my friend rushing me to the hospital after I passed out, and t... | 4 | 6.5 | |
1359878512 | 1359897635 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | [deleted]: TIFU by believing my best friend was truly into me.
So, I'm a dumbass ... I was under the impression (based on actions that im not going to get into) that my best friend liked me for more than a friend. Until tonight when we hung out -- he had a girl over -- and sent me home (drunk) so he could hook up with ... | 3 | 7.333333 | |
1359889583 | 1359969667 | null | t5_2to41 | 3,009 | FranklinFox: TIFU by going to work in a good mood.
Got accused of being drunk, got sent home after 45 minutes, had to get breathalysed, had to ring and talk to the big boss to prove I was sober, got told I could be fired on the spot (even though my BAC was 0, so that would be unfair dismissal).
Lesson I learned toda... | 14 | 214.928571 | |
1359907451 | 1359962996 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | NickB402: TIFU and lost the greatest girl i know over some old nudes pictures I had received.
Let me explain further. When i was younger, my friends and I had a sort of game, a bigger dick contest in a way. The goal was to get nudes from girls and see who had the most. I have had these pictures for about five years now... | 6 | 3.833333 | |
1359906619 | 1360017595 | null | t5_2to41 | 67 | Paiste402: TIFU by forgetting my room mate has asthma with a smoke machine prank where he thought his room was on fire and broke his bedroom window trying to escape
I have a room mate named Mike and hes a cool dude but a lot of fun to do shit to. Walk past and say "Mike, your family hates you. You were a blow job taken... | 6 | 11.166667 | |
1359926245 | 1360011637 | null | t5_2to41 | 85 | Sharkictus: TIFU by masturbating with spicy hands
There's this delicious frozen pepperoni pizza costco sells. I always add a shit ton of a crushed red peppers, before it goes into the oven So when it comes out it spicy delicious pizza.
Well after eating, I was on Reddit, and I saw a certain NSFW gif in /r/gaming regar... | 4 | 21.25 | |
1359926937 | 1360113224 | null | t5_2to41 | 59 | throwawaypuke: TIFU by vomiting in front of a hot girl
This did not actually happen today, it happened in the fall, but it warrants retelling.
I was about to be a freshman at a large public University and had made friends with a girl off of the Facebook group of said university. We chatted over the summer every day, ... | 3 | 19.666667 | |
1359934536 | 1359949681 | null | t5_2to41 | 55 | edc2012: TIFU By my friend video taping me peeing in my fridge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zLbVKTBdWc
Last night got pretty crazy which started out with many many shots of good old plastic handle vodka that continued to lead into slapping the wine bag (That bitch got slapped all night). Arriving at our friends p... | 3 | 18.333333 | |
1359942890 | 1360066657 | null | t5_2to41 | 0 | [deleted]: TIFU by ordering online gold.
I used my mother's credit card number (I am under 18 so still live with my family) to order 20m gold for RuneScape, which cost about $10. I was wondering why it was taking so long, and then checked my email to see this:
Dear [name]:
Thank you for your recent order and payment a... | 6 | 0 | |
1359945052 | 1360029776 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,041 | unipsych: TIFU by letting my mom rummage through my room
So today my mother was in a mood. A certain mood I know well, a mood that drives her to clean. So after deciding my room as her target, she begins to tear in with me by her side. She was going full honey badger, digging through everything, but I believed I had no... | 18 | 57.833333 | |
1359937186 | 1360089471 | null | t5_2to41 | 48 | DavidnFresh: TIFU by hitting the wall.
Sorry for wall of text, I typed this on my IPod. Though this happened around three weeks ago, I'll believe this is probably one of my dumbest fuck ups I had ever made. There were only a few days left of my strength training class before first semester ended so my teacher had decid... | 4 | 12 | |
1359950940 | 1360020526 | null | t5_2to41 | 28 | [deleted]: TIFU by drunk texting.
It was Saturday night and I was out with friends making the rounds and some college house parties. I am comfortably drunk at this point and decide to hit up our local bar/dancing spot. While on the dancefloor, I notice a guy I had met there the previous week.
Last week, I met him at ... | 20 | 1.4 | |
1359953623 | 1360020954 | null | t5_2to41 | 20 | thecreator666: TIFU by telling a kid Santa isn't real.
This actually happened friday after school not today
So theres this legend at my school (high school) that everyone's favorite coach had sex with this girl who was possibly the hottest girl to have come through our town EVER. this was said to have happened 4 years... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1359958303 | 1360045591 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | Locrian_DM: TIFU by keeping the counter at 0000 for the second day in a row
Sushi made me shit myself again! Didn't eat anymore, but it was the same thing as yesterday. This time I was doing some yardwork and I tried to rip a fart. Juicy, squishy mess plopped out. Again, I felt it coming and I clenched up tight. M... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1359964284 | 1360034012 | null | t5_2to41 | 274 | poor_decisions: TIFU and now I'm bleeding from the butthole.
Earlier today I was trying to get to my car, which was on the other side of a navel-high fence. Of course, in my divine wisdom, I decided to try and step over the fence rather than jumping over, or (better yet), walking the extra 20 yards around the fence. I... | 5 | 54.8 | |
1359968532 | 1360081763 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | James010: TIFU- cooking fail.
My housemate and I are also coursemates at uni, and sometimes I'll cook for both of us (no homo) in return for him tutoring me. I was making pork chops with mash potatoes. Spuds are done so I go to mash them and they need a little milk to soften... Get the milk from the fridge, check the b... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1359978198 | 1359979631 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | DevilSmiley666: TIFU by pouring petrol in the oil tank of the lawn mower
i had just come home after school expecting that my older brother to have mowed the lawn like he said he would the night before. Surely enough nor the front and back yard had been done, so i told my dad and mum that i would do it. So i begin to pr... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1359981212 | 1360042686 | null | t5_2to41 | 116 | theroob85: TIFU by wearing skinny jeans.
(This was a couple months ago but I just found this sub-reddit and wanted to share.)
I came back home to visit my friends and family from being stationed in Europe for a year. The family threw a welcome back party for me and invited relatives and friends over for food and drink... | 6 | 19.333333 | |
1359983221 | 1360074653 | null | t5_2to41 | 311 | roltrap: TIFU by not thinking straight after being cheated on
A few weeks ago I found out that my now ex-girlfriend sucked her best friends dick. I was hurt and mad, but I love(d) her, so I made her promiss not to hurt me anymore and be faithful. I gave her another chance.
I noticed though that she kept playing with h... | 8 | 38.875 | |
1359991755 | 1360008600 | null | t5_2to41 | 68 | _____rs: TIFU by eating beans that expired in 2009.
I've got stuff coming out my butthole that I've never seen before. But at least I haven't reset the counter.
SgtSausage: Beans don't ”expire”
Childwood: Dried beans don't but the ones in a can will, granted it can take 2 years+ depending on how you store them.
I don'... | 7 | 9.714286 | |
1359993369 | 1360011760 | null | t5_2to41 | 46 | rubsnick: TIFU by eating to many nuts and pissing my own underwear and pants.
On Friday me and the wife got these awesome nuts from Walmart, has cashews and all the good ones. I'm addicted to nuts so I ended up eating all of them over the weekend. big mistakes since I've had the runs all weekend. So today I arrive to w... | 8 | 5.75 | |
1359995933 | 1360004522 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling someone who just got me a gift-card for christmas that I think gift-cards are bad presents.
So it was my best friend's mom's birthday. Our families are very close since we have been best friends for so long and live very near to each other.
I went to the craft store to get her a birthday g... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1360001261 | 1360784103 | null | t5_2to41 | 272 | m00sician: TIFU by destryoing a very high payed web project that was supposed to go online tomorrow
So yeah. Due to NDA's 'n shit I can't really talk as openly as I want about this, but I think I can explain the idiocy that is me.
I'm a webdesigner and I work at a pretty good advertising company. We landed a big deal ... | 6 | 45.333333 | |
1360007378 | 1360091708 | null | t5_2to41 | 2,548 | ella1993: TIFUpdate: TIFU by making a stupid bet with a guy I barely know and now I have to clean his apartment in the nude.
[Original post here](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/17pdc2/tifu_by_making_a_stupid_bet_with_a_guy_i_barely/). **TLDR**: I bet an acquaintance of mine that Ian McKellen had been on the TV s... | 10 | 254.8 | |
1360009505 | 1360027133 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | hellopterodactylface: TIFU I unknowingly peed/sat on a poisonous plant that made my ass burn and itch for a good 2 hours.
I'm studying abroad and not at all familiar with plants here. There was no bathroom so I asked the locals where to go and they pointed to this massive cliff/hill with a single tree separating me fr... | 3 | 11.666667 | |
1359948402 | 1360024092 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | malakon: TIFU by exploding the engine on my snowblower.
I'm so pissed at myself for doing something I damn well know better not to do. Haven't had any snow here in Chicago for a damn long time until .. yesterday. Ok, so really i fucked up yesterday not today. So I went out to the shed - to start a snowblower that hadn'... | 3 | 4 | |
1360012410 | 1360033197 | null | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU by making a bad joke about an old teacher of mine
I just found this sub today and the actual event happened a few months ago. My cousin sent me a link to a police website where there was a report about an ex-teacher at my high school who was being accused of rape. The teacher was super nice and no one e... | 5 | 3 | |
1360021185 | 1360083716 | null | t5_2to41 | 257 | meowmeowbuttsex: TIFU by NOT shitting myself.
No, the title is not sarcasm.
I had a tough quiz today, and I did well. So I decided to treat myself to some Taco Bell, as I haven't had any in ages. I figured I'd be spending the night in, studying for my upcoming midterms anyway, so it didn't matter if I got the Taco Bel... | 6 | 42.833333 | |
1360024229 | 1360116462 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | unassumingname: TIFU by accidentally sending a link of nude photos to a friend
I did some nude photography/modeling a few years back, and while I love the pieces I did and do not regret them in the slightest, I don't particularly want seeing my friends, especially male friends, seeing me nude, mostly because I have *bo... | 5 | 3.8 | |
1360026215 | 1360071717 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by leaving an obscene /b/ thread open on my dad's laptop.
My dad's computer is the only one that our printer recognizes so I had to use it earlier. He doesn't like me using it otherwise, but I jumped on 4chan while I was doing my printing and closed it without thinking when I was done. Lo and behold, my... | 7 | 2 | |
1360024831 | 1360186212 | null | t5_2to41 | 45 | mrsblackberrykush: TIFU by not knowing the parameters of my webcam
Yesterday I was chatting on google hangout with my long distance boyfriend and a mutual friend. We were just chatting when the friend had to go run an errand. While he was gone I took the opportunity to show my boyfriend a really cute dress I bought rec... | 8 | 5.625 | |
1360028974 | 1360045237 | null | t5_2to41 | 374 | motke_ganef: TIFU by the drunk decision to go home
So there was this exam but I'm out of money but my buddies pay my beer.
After I drink the umpteenth glass I am out of my wits and my buddies advise I should really *go home*. Now I could have walked but walking makes me dizzy so I trod to bus stop, take the next bus t... | 6 | 62.333333 | |
1360027816 | 1360082074 | null | t5_2to41 | 91 | CreamWafers: TIFU by laughing so hard I shat myself
I have been sick with the flu lately so I have mostly just been lying around browsing the web all day. Well, today I was feeling a bit less nauseous so I decided I was ready to eat an actual, decently sized meal. That was my first fuckup. I was pleasantly surprised... | 4 | 22.75 | |
1360030212 | 1360110241 | null | t5_2to41 | 72 | thebornotaku: TIFU by using a lock on my locker at the gym.
It's been a couple weeks since I'd been to the gym. I got sick, I started a new job, life was generally being shitty and in the way. After some gentle encouragement from my girlfriend, I agreed that I really did need to get back on it and go back to working ou... | 3 | 24 | |
1360030437 | 1360047887 | null | t5_2to41 | 61 | [deleted]: TIFU by being the other man
It all started with me breaking up with my girlfriend of two years. I felt like we were growing apart, and eventually we started arguing about everything and anything. This led me to break things off three days ago. So, in an attempt to cheer me up, one of my friends, also a cowor... | 5 | 12.2 |
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