start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1360556674 | 1360808258 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | kire73: TIFU by dropping my laptop
On Friday my aunt got married. She asked me if I would do photography because it is a hobby of mine and many of my relatives suggested me because they really liked my stuff. I was flattered so I went all out snapped all day and throughout the night, reception and all. I even got my vi... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1360564242 | 1360680599 | null | t5_2to41 | 486 | [deleted]: TIFU while finally getting it on with my dream guy
So basically I have been totally in love with a mutual friend for forever. We start dating and I'm psyched. Obviously, because I care so much, I make him wait a while for sex. So three months in shit's FINALLY going down, it's totally hot, whatever. We finis... | 11 | 44.181818 | |
1360556035 | 1360597067 | null | t5_2to41 | 601 | Loborious: TIFU by going the wrong funeral and paid my last respects to a complete stranger.
My grandfather's girlfriend passed away on Friday. I intended to go to the funeral to represent my family (who are all overseas at the moment). I looked up the obit and found what I thought was the ceremony for her.
After arr... | 6 | 100.166667 | |
1360566120 | 1360727526 | null | t5_2to41 | 318 | A_Cave_Man: TIFU by trying to take care of a pesky bees nest,
I was drinking on my lawn, when I noticed that there is more bees than usual. I look around for a while and realize that the reason there is so darn many bees, is that there is a nest of bees right by my front door! [Exhibit A](http://i.imgur.com/tlk95QL.jp... | 7 | 45.428571 | |
1360580720 | 1360664012 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | Josphin: TIFU by having a cold, and thinking it was a good idea to take some NyQuil .
That sounds pretty standard, it's what I usually do when I get sick. But I haven't been sick to the point where I felt the need for NyQuil since I've been on cymbalta. I tried doing some research before hand to see if there were any w... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1360581146 | 1360596982 | null | t5_2to41 | 60 | AlvaAlv: TIFU by not checking my documents twice before printing.
i have a paper work due tomorrow.. i have been doing it since one week ago so.. no typo, wrong punctuation, no plagiarism, and such thing..
but i was too excited about giving it to my teacher so that he would say.. "good work". So sadly, i'm too hasty w... | 4 | 15 | |
1360593237 | 1360616094 | null | t5_2to41 | 75 | darkplumb90: [Meta] What happened to the Fuck Up Of The Week?
Just a minor observation...what happened to it? There hasn't been one in over a month.
MissKensington: Also, where did the counter go? I liked the counter. :(
Prepare_To_Be_Woo-ed: [Removed](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/184iz6/meta_did_you_really_fu... | 6 | 12.5 | |
1360598395 | 1360707076 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,735 | beastmode747: TIFU by having sex with my girlfriend on Christmas day.
this actually happened two years ago but i am new to reddit.
One Christmas day my parents had both sides of my family over for turkey dinner. roughly about 25 people in total. half of my family is catholic (no sex before marriage) and the other hal... | 13 | 133.461538 | |
1360612627 | 1360636187 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting drunk
So yesterday I was at a party and i don't normally drink but last night I decided to. It's been so long since I last drank so my tolerance is really low. When my mom picked me up she could tell that I had been drinking because I guess I was slurring my words or some shit, I can't think ... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1360616093 | 1361092934 | null | t5_2to41 | 79 | [deleted]: TIFU when trimming myself.
Was cropping down **there** with an electric hair trimmer. Wanted to know how well it would work on my (very hairy legs). I forgot to realize that the trimmer was on the lowest setting (1 aka skin). So there I am, with a landing strip of bare skin on my wolf leg. I get the *genius*... | 9 | 8.777778 | |
1360618830 | 1360906185 | null | t5_2to41 | 204 | thevinylgamer: TIFU by hitting the random button on reddit too much.
So apparently if you hit the random button on reddit too much, you'll get linked to r/bluewaffles. I was just looking around reddit while my dad was sitting behind me, reading a book (the subreddit has a huge picture a blue waffle that fills the page... | 7 | 29.142857 | |
1360622349 | 1360690472 | null | t5_2to41 | 15 | creepersneedkarma2: TIFU by almost burning my house down.
I have a bearded dragon and on his cage their are 2 lights a basking light and a UVB light. When I left to go to the store I forgot to lock the door to my room (locks on the inside and outside). So my cat decides to come in my room at look at the bearded dragons... | 5 | 3 | |
1360611841 | 1360656757 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | putitanywhere: TIFU by going outside without checking the door
Last night, I went to a Mardi Gras ball and ate a little too much junk. This morning, I wasn't feeling well and vomited around 6:30. My parents were leaving for work and I tried to go back to sleep when they left. About a half hour later, I felt like I had ... | 4 | 8.25 | |
1360628575 | 1360795580 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | xavi620: TIFU by opening my dad's internet browser on his phone and scarring myself for life.
I was in the kitchen w/ my parents preparing dinner and I wanted to watch YouTube but I accidentally opened my dad's internet browser and was welcomed to PunishTube.com. I'll let you figure out what that is. I can't look my d... | 5 | 6.2 | |
1360631486 | 1360632188 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by drinking lemonade
Not a half hour ago this happened. I was thirsty so I went to go get a mini bottle of lemonade. Nope.
I happened to remember last night I peed into one of the empty bottles to avoid waking my roommates and replaced it back to where my lemonade stash was. When I went to get one I f... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1360625312 | 1360681532 | null | t5_2to41 | 55 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling my manager's manager that I work with idiots.
Ewalk: Well? Were they? I would have said the same thing, especially if they are idiots.
[deleted]: Lets just say that I often find non-rechargeable batteries in the battery charger.
creamersrealm: We need a better example that is curiosity not s... | 5 | 11 | |
1360637715 | 1360659350 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | capspaz: TIFU By going to Goodwill
So after school some of my friends and I decided to head by goodwill to buy some cheap clothes. I set down my back pack, which contained my (300 dollar) glasses and new, somewhat expensive jacket. Soon a mega shopping spree ensues and completely forget about my backpack.
*Fast Forw... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1360641367 | 1360715541 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | Rough_mouth_sex: Well friends, my fuck up is not just of a day but a lifetime. I realized today I am gay and have been in denial of being in denial and have wasted the past 29 years.
Well friends, my fuck up is not just of a day but a lifetime. I realized today I am gay and have been in denial of being in denial and ha... | 5 | 3.8 | |
1360643928 | 1360693108 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | [deleted]: [META] TODAY I Fucked up
People are getting it confused and I think these posts should be removed. It's not "holy shit here is my worst fuckup story." The title of the subreddit is."Today I Fucked Up"
Can the mods please step up and enforce the fact that the stories should have at least happened this week, ... | 7 | 1.714286 | |
1360652440 | 1360733981 | null | t5_2to41 | 79 | pewpoopew: TIFU by hard-shutting down a random girls computer on campus... While she probably had unsaved work
I needed to look up information on what bill collectors are allowed to do (stupid Verizon, different story.) so I went to the public computer lab on campus. These particular machines are set up in really long... | 5 | 15.8 | |
1360650732 | 1360671684 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | fatblackninja: TIFU by freezing my water
Every day I refill my bottle of water, put it in the freezer, and wait just before it gets totally frozen so it's sort of like a water slush. Right now I just got it out of the freezer at the PERFECT time. Not too watery but not too frozen. Perfection.
Well, first sip I take a... | 3 | 1 | |
1360678883 | 1360812301 | null | t5_2to41 | 928 | [deleted]: TIFU by leaving my girlfriend alone with my laptop
We've been together for a little more than 7 months and yesterday she was alone, all day at my house while I was at work. She was using my laptop for Facebook, email, etc. No big deal, until she starts deleting the history "icons" from Chrome's home page. Sh... | 14 | 66.285714 | |
1360690527 | 1360691351 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by starting a subreddit using my college's name
it was a complete brain fart. I was just trying to set up a subreddit for news about the school and its alumni and where people could post and organize meetups (not that I intend to set these up myself, I'm a redditor afterall). I used the school's name ... | 3 | 2 | |
1360690678 | 1360955090 | null | t5_2to41 | 38 | [deleted]: TIFU when eating at The Boiling Crab
I actually FU'd yesterday, but I'll explain why I'm posting it a day later.
I'm sure most of the folks in California know what [The Boiling Crab](http://www.theboilingcrab.com/) restaurant is, and I'm sure there's other restaurants like it elsewhere. It's basically an... | 7 | 5.428571 | |
1360692145 | 1361018687 | null | t5_2to41 | 24 | detectivetrap: TIFU By trying to be too PC
So i work at a desk checking in students at my university. We're expected to be as helpful as possible, so i routinely ask people who look like they are struggling if they need help. One of the residents in the building has a disability where his hand is deformed. It kind of l... | 5 | 4.8 | |
1360693672 | 1360696154 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by making a Teacher leave the school for good.
(This wasn't today, it was a couple years ago)
Anyway, we had this French teacher who didn't allow any talking or whatever, we obviously didn't like this.
We decided to put up with it for a while because we did nothing, she only ever asked 3 people questio... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1360697393 | 1360699795 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | OppsIPissedMyPants: TIFU, I warned you...
So yesterday around 5 or so I met up with a friend for drinks. Nothing to spectacular here, We drank, played pool, and did some shots....... Quite a few shots. We ended up bar hopping and probably went to 4 or so bars(I believe). We ended up on his side of town near closing tim... | 6 | 2.833333 | |
1360696618 | 1360722106 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | BestNameEverTaken: Tifu by smashing my face against the wall and possibly breaking my nose
Soo.. A few hours ago, I was at the garden terrace of my house. After throwing away some crap, I turned around to go inside again.
However, I turned around at a speed that turns out to be as dangerous as to eventually break my n... | 6 | 2.666667 | |
1360698890 | 1360808837 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | MissMusicLover: TIFU by murdering my iPhone
I was browsing reddit on my iPhone and listening to music and the battery was like 3%. But normaly when it dies it just turns off and I charge it and it workes again. my charger was upstairs and the lazy ass I am, I letted it die. When it turned off, I puted it on the charger... | 4 | 1 | |
1360703857 | 1360742480 | null | t5_2to41 | 47 | Hollyisahat: TIFU by handing in random crap to my professor
So, I have to hand in one copy of a script to my professor, and take one to a meeting with this actor. No problem, right? I print them off, hand one in. Except later that day, at the meeting with the actor, i notice there are still two copies in my bag....and... | 3 | 15.666667 | |
1360705788 | 1360783941 | null | t5_2to41 | 77 | fredskingdom: TIFU by sneezing so hard I projectile shat myself in Tesco.
I was strolling round the supermarket, as you do, completely switched off to anything that was going on around me. Happily working my way through the list, until I came to the veg isle; for it was there that out of the blue, the most powerful sne... | 5 | 15.4 | |
1360708337 | 1360708828 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by opening my mouth
Couple of female co-workers came into the office to hang out and see what was up... no problem, I welcome them.
*Veronica* notices that apparently i have a clean desk in relation to hers. I am quick to point out my desk is cluttered with personal and work items all over the place.... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1360712008 | 1360723115 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | renieri: TIFU by believing a story in /r/tifu
I'm a fan, don't get me wrong, but as I was reading my third /r/tifu story I found myself unable to suspend my disbelief.
I wonder, is there any way for us to substantiate these claims? If not, what makes this stuff different than writing flash fiction. Thoughts or a d... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1360719195 | 1361855142 | null | t5_2to41 | 116 | NakedMuffinTime: TIFU by crop dusting my office, and when our boss walked in, I blamed it on a female coworker.
Well, this morning, for breakfast I had the typical: Omelet, hash browns, pancakes...
Well, every time I eat those damn eggs, I tend to get really gaseous. I'm not talking typical farts, I mean those dread... | 5 | 23.2 | |
1360713735 | 1360808891 | null | t5_2to41 | 73 | naughtism: New job last week. Said the wrong thing to a "customer" today.
So, I just started working last Thursday at a new job with a local credit union. Today was my first day working the counter with my own cash drawer. My first "customer" (doesn't actually have an account with us. Just lives in the motel/apartment ... | 5 | 14.6 | |
1360729665 | 1360733997 | null | t5_2to41 | 141 | Ransora: TIFU by making fun of my friends dead mom
He posted a fb status that said "She is going to be so happy this Valentines Day" and I replied with "Who, your mom?" He was pissed. So many others were pissed. In my defense, I didn't know she was dead.
intestinal_turmoil: Ok, my mom passed away and I would still lau... | 4 | 35.25 | |
1360729893 | 1360781148 | null | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU by going for anal
alright not necessarily my fuck up but my friend does not have internet and wishes for me to share it with reddit. (forgive me for I have not been a redditor for long)
Well one day he was going to his friends house he and his mom lived with them at the time and she was his "special" f... | 4 | 5 | |
1360715301 | 1360732065 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by threatening my friend with a bioterrorism joke.
I'm new to this whole reddit thing so yeah.
Today I fucked up by joking with my friend at the bus stop. I'm sort of ridiculous so I make violent jokes and eventually I started quoting World War Z by Max Brooks. There's this one section of the book wher... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1360730584 | 1360770242 | null | t5_2to41 | 340 | anglegrinder9: TIFU by reading along with a friend with the wrong book, for over a week.
Doing a buddy read of Mockingjay (third Hunger Games) with a good friend. I keep complaining about how much it's like Catching Fire (the second Hunger Games book). My friend keeps mentioning plot details don't seem to have happened... | 12 | 28.333333 | |
1360747053 | 1360808007 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | NotADamsel: TIFU by watching a YouTube video without checking the title.
I came back from class today a little worn out. Due to insomnia (and Reddit... grumble grumble) I haven't been sleeping well and I was just *beat*! So, I sit down in front of my computer to look at whatever the internet throws my way.
"Oh "bear c... | 6 | 0.333333 | |
1360768218 | 1361479104 | null | t5_2to41 | 3,201 | kitty_puncher: TIFU by punching my friend's cat
I am so sorry. I am a terrible person. My friend and I were hanging out and his cat was chilling on the couch between us. We paused our video gaming to watch the state of the union address and at some point we started to kung fu fight each other like best friends do. Only... | 16 | 200.0625 | |
1360774903 | 1360800491 | null | t5_2to41 | 541 | spunkythoraway: TIFU by misjudging the force of ejaculate.
Here I was, minding my own business, watching the filthiest dirtiest smut I could find, because I'm just classy like that, and I really got more than I bargained for.
It starts off so innocently, as it always does. Me sitting here nude, contemplating my next h... | 16 | 33.8125 | |
1360773839 | 1360808326 | null | t5_2to41 | 47 | Leoz_Maxwell_Jillumz: TIFU by almost shitting my pants at the gym.
This was last night, but whatever here we go. So I go to my gym everynight around the same time 6 days a week. There are about 20-30 people that I will see there on a daily basis at the same time as me. One of which is a girl my age, very attractive. W... | 6 | 7.833333 | |
1360782728 | 1360854399 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | Espousebeard: TIFU by leaving my iPod out where the dog could get it.
Long story short, over the last month or so, my dog - a basset hound - has been obsessed with my iPod. He loves to chew things, (including my erasers and rulers, which in itself is annoying), and he always looks longingly up at me when I'm listening... | 5 | 2.8 | |
1360783844 | 1360858867 | null | t5_2to41 | 782 | NoKumSok: TIFU by breaking the toilet with my new dildo.
So I just want to preface this whole thing by saying fuck Canada Post. I was home all god damn morning and their delivery still somehow failed. So I had to haul my sore ass (gaha, foreshadowing) all the way to the post office to pick up my god damn dildo of doom.... | 9 | 86.888889 | |
1360788683 | 1360791883 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | iMeki: TIFU By nearly causing my brothers death
It all started out normally, just me and my family walking into macy's. I remember me and my brother talking and laughing about some shit that happened that day. Im usually friendly with my brother, at least more than my other siblings. Only problem is he isn't the smarte... | 6 | 1.5 | |
1360785291 | 1360873447 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | Hollyisahat: TIFUpdate by handing in random crap to my professor
Original post http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/18eeze/tifu_by_handing_in_random_crap_to_my_professor/
Now before i say anything more, let me say that this is a particularly strict professor. Not mean necessarily, just strict. He doesn't like me much... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1360794872 | 1360808996 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by doing a chargeback
more like 6 months ago, but still.
DONT DO CHARGE BACKS IF YOU USE A PREPAID CREDIT CARD.
WTFisBehindYou: What happened?
A_A_A_A_AAA: i had a prepaid credit card.
i entered my date wrong on clickandbuy, which i used for steam. Used too.
I enteered my date wrong and panicked. Res... | 5 | 0.8 | |
1360795440 | 1360882143 | null | t5_2to41 | 93 | Rodolis: TIFU by letting a stinky girl sit on my lap.
It was lunchtime, and there weren't any seats left on the table, so one of my friends, asked if she could sit on my lap. I obviously agreed, since she was kinda hot. I didn't pay any mind to her, so I wouldn't look desperate. Then, I took a deep breath. BAM! The wor... | 7 | 13.285714 | |
1360799117 | 1361135201 | null | t5_2to41 | 135 | timeforchange995: TIFU by letting the neighbor kids see me naked
I just got home from work, and decided to wash my cares away with a hot, cleansing shower. I felt inclined to listen to music while I showered, but of course I didn't realize this until I had already completely disrobed. Alas! My laptop was in the kitchen... | 7 | 19.285714 | |
1360793659 | 1362271478 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | MalevolentFerret: TIFU by shutting my claustrophobic friend in a cupboard.
She went in to get something. I, being an asshat, totally forgot and decided to barricade the door. She cried when she got out. I left in shame.
fox099: moar description pls
Bacon_nommer: Holy fuck man I talked to you on omegle yesterday
fox099... | 4 | 2 | |
1360809554 | 1360879176 | null | t5_2to41 | 287 | kimchi11: TIFU by trying to rub "dirt" off someone's forehead
Here I am thinking I'm being all nice when I truthfully don't know what the fuck lent is all about. I work front desk at a salon and a woman checked in today with black shit rubbed all over her forehead. I immediately start laughing and walked around my des... | 6 | 47.833333 | |
1360810922 | 1360986531 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | NorthAve: TIFU by passing out into a bucket of my own vomit.
No, I wasn't drunk. I have had a really nasty stomach virus that didn't allow me to keep any liquids down for almost 3 days. Today, I started getting light headed and decided it was time to go to the ER. I'm at check in and comment that I'm about to puke, so... | 5 | 4.4 | |
1360813539 | 1360872548 | null | t5_2to41 | 32 | [deleted]: TIFU by letting the Tech Support see my search history...
So today the tech-support guy was working out a wi-fi problem my phone was having, no big deal. (My phone doesn't have support for proxies and stuff, so we were sorting that out)
It all goes fine, and he goes onto the phones browser to check if the c... | 5 | 6.4 | |
1360815713 | 1360915234 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | gibstergg: TiFU by drenching my mom with gasoline on her favorite dress and boots.
My mother is a professional singer, so we were driving to where she was preforming. We had to stop for some gas and she wanted $20 worth. When it was at $20 I pulled out the pump... while it was still pumping gas. It sprayed on me a litt... | 5 | 3.8 | |
1360819051 | 1360894082 | null | t5_2to41 | 66 | obpeacemaker9: TIFU by inadvertently calling a Girl Scout fat
I was at the grocery store today and there were Girl Scouts selling cookies. One of the girls was eating a box of Thin Mints and there where open boxes of cookies all around her. She asked me if I would like to buy any cookies, to which I replied " No thanks... | 8 | 8.25 | |
1360819515 | 1360907056 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | [deleted]: TIFU by swearing in church
I'm catholic, and had to go to church for ash wednesday. After we had gotten our ashes but before the mass ended, I rubbed my face. I then realized I had rubbed my ashes all the way across my forehead and then scrubbed them back. My palm was covered in it. I decided to counter this... | 4 | 8.25 | |
1360808562 | 1360959591 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | stickbait: by using the dog's toothbrush.
I've been dog-sitting. My current charge is an arthritic, old sweetheart of a yellow lab who requires medication and whom I must watch carefully lest he eat his own poop. When I stay with him, I camp out on the kitchen floor with him because he gets a little nervous when his fa... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1360834323 | 1360901549 | null | t5_2to41 | 106 | LooseGround: TIFU by leaving sissie porn open on laptop
Throwaway account: Today I fucked up...yet I don't know how badly yet. I'd left a porn window open on the laptop my wife and I use, and the porn site just happened to be of the 'sissie' variety. After we'd both come home from work, had dinner, and talked a litt... | 4 | 26.5 | |
1360819389 | 1361679340 | null | t5_2to41 | 21 | Blackwolf66: TIFU by not choosing the right boots
TIFU at making smart decisions. This probably wont be terribly exciting, but this morning my unit had a ruck march scheduled. Its a 5 mile and 50 lbs ruck. When I woke up and got dressed, I looked between my newer more comfortable boots and an older and heavier pair. I ... | 6 | 3.5 | |
1360845500 | 1360864268 | null | t5_2to41 | 42 | [deleted]: TIFU by not clearing my browser history
Was home all day, bored, a porn hole ensued. My girlfriend took the opportunity of me leaving the house at night to check out my browser history. She is not pleased, actually quite disgusted. Happy Valentines day honey!
SaintDale: Figure out what incognito mode is.
t3... | 3 | 14 | |
1360847039 | 1360951297 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,087 | LJ2003: TIFU by burning my fiances testicles...
...*sigh*. The title pretty much says it all, but Ill explain a bit.
Start the story realizing that I got up at 530am to get ready for work, and am still a little groggy from my Ambien I took the night before. To top that off I had dental work done yesterday, so the fir... | 8 | 135.875 | |
1360822495 | 1361146021 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | lostintime2004: TIFU by sending my classmate/good friend a message telling her how I felt in Swedish, while high on Ambien...
So I am a big insomniac and take Ambien CR to sleep, and apparently last night I sent my psudo crush a message telling her how I felt entirely in Swedish via iMessage. I just noticed it, and rea... | 6 | 3.833333 | |
1360871270 | 1360878607 | null | t5_2to41 | 54 | mankstar: TIFU by gesturing too much with a burrito
I have a huge presentation this afternoon and was eating a chipotle burrito, when I was telling a story to my co-worker. I gestured rather vigorously and spilled the contents on my stomach/lap. I have no idea how to get this stuff clean again and I'm too far to just g... | 3 | 18 | |
1360869982 | 1360900039 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to win back my lost love.
HAH, So here's a little backstory. Back when I moved to Toronto, ON I met this amazing girl on the bus, the way I broke the ice was talking shit about her shitty BlackBerry(this thing was welllllll past it's due) but it was nice, she wasn't about accessories, it showe... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1360880982 | 1360921035 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to give myself blue balls... twice
So it's Valentine's Day, and I wake up with morning wood. I text my girlfriend to inform her of my situation and that I couldn't wait to see her tonight, so that she knows I want to have sex tonight.
Normally when I wake up with morning wood, I'll fap and co... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1360886244 | 1360986756 | null | t5_2to41 | 270 | [deleted]: TIFU by attempting to talk to my crush
Definitely not as good as the scalding hot balls TIFU from earlier this morning, but here is my own
DISCLAIMER: I apologize for the lack of horrific anal injuries
So anyways I figured since today was Valentine's Day I would actually just go up to my crush during our l... | 12 | 22.5 | |
1360884551 | 1360975940 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | Royale_wCheese: TIFU by sleeping through my Valentine's date with a man I've been really hoping would ask me out.
I went to bed at about 6 AM last night and woke up at about 8 this morning, only getting two hours of sleep. I don't have school or work today, so I went about being lazy with the day. I ate breakfast, bro... | 7 | 3.714286 | |
1360888980 | 1360988684 | null | t5_2to41 | 156 | magicaxis: TIFU by showing a girl who's friend had just been killed by a drunk driver a .gif of a man being run over
Hooooo boy here we go.
A friend of mine messaged me on facebook, telling me why she didn't make it to rehearsals today. Her friend had been killed by a drunk driver yesterday. She was engaged to her boy... | 6 | 26 | |
1360885498 | 1360894153 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU by backing into my housemates new car.
I was in a rush to leave for class, and had forgotten to ask him to move his car the night before. While he was backing up i started to go too, i thought he was going to back into the street like we always do, but instead he stopped and pulled forward to take the s... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1360909448 | 1360916642 | null | t5_2to41 | 30 | wikthis: TIFU by breaking my dick
Well this didn't happen to me, but to a close friend of mine. He is currently in the hospital.
So today, he goes over to his GF's house, to the promise of sex. Well you see, its his first time, and he rarely watches porn, like maybe once or twice a month. He goes over, things get hot... | 6 | 5 | |
1360904575 | 1360975710 | null | t5_2to41 | 47 | wingman16: TIFU by not taking advantage of Qdoba's BOGO deal
So Qdoba had this deal today, it being Valentine's Day and all, it was BOGO if you kissed someone else in line.
So cut to about 9pm. I was on a bus with this extremely attractive girl that I had a thing for last year. She brings up this BOGO deal seemingly jo... | 3 | 15.666667 | |
1360908061 | 1360935451 | null | t5_2to41 | 78 | NISCBTFM: TIFU by posting a stick it note on someone's back...
This was a while ago, but I still feel horrible about it.
I was working as a server in a national park for the summer, so we were all away from home. The game started innocently enough posting stick it notes on people's back that said things like "I'm d... | 4 | 19.5 | |
1360913129 | 1360951595 | null | t5_2to41 | 53 | thatsuperperson: TIFU by trying to kiss a girl
I recently moved away from this town I had lived in for a few years, and before I moved I decided I wanted to spend one final movie night with this girl who I had a major crush on.
So she comes over to my house and we are having a great time (at least I thought so) and I... | 4 | 13.25 | |
1360922807 | 1360989808 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,967 | Disgruntled_Fridge: TIFU by peeing in my girlfriends mouth
This was actually last weekend.
I've been going out with this girl for a couple of weeks, and last week she invited me up to her cousins holiday house for a weekend. My parents said it was cool, assuming that there would be some form of parental supervision. S... | 30 | 65.566667 | |
1360926537 | 1360927083 | null | t5_2to41 | 1 | [deleted]: TIFU by replying to a reddit post while drunk
today/last night I had a university valentines day party. The people I went with are new friends I don't really know that well and they got me drunk really quickly (Pouring my drinks for me). Sometime before we ended up at the tavern where the party was being hel... | 3 | 0.333333 | |
1360940673 | 1360984617 | null | t5_2to41 | 86 | [deleted]: TIFU by breaking my girlfriend's toilet.
We're both 17. Late last night/early this morning, we decided to drink a little bit. Eventually we both get pretty drunk and are feeling pretty good. For some reason, I think it's a good idea to see how much of a 40 ounce bottle I can fill up with my pee. I tend to do... | 5 | 17.2 | |
1360952639 | 1361134835 | null | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: TIFU By sleeping with my boss who is in fact secretly sleeping with her boss...
The is the craziest thing that has happened to me in a long time. I asked my boss, a 33 year old fox over to my 22 year old out of town parents house to smoke some trees last night as we were getting off. She tells me to follow... | 3 | 4.333333 | |
1360951740 | 1361044622 | null | t5_2to41 | 141 | gumtosser: TIFU by throwing my gum on someone thinking they were a trashcan
I was walking out of one of my morning classes, still not fully woken up and pretty oblivious to my surroundings. My gum had run out of flavor during class so I needed to dispose of it. I exited class and rounded the corner, where I know there ... | 3 | 47 | |
1360956342 | 1363193600 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by breaking my brand new touch screen laptop while i had a gentleman caller
so picture this, im in my hotel room waiting for a gentleman to come pay me a visit. im sitting at the desk watching the golden girls, as you do, on my brand new touch screen 17" laptop, waiting for this man to come have his wa... | 7 | 1.428571 | |
1360966263 | 1361030917 | null | t5_2to41 | 32 | andimnotamormon: TIFU by staying at my friend's house for too long while her parents were away.
This was last night, but I went ahead and posted it anyways.
So it was Valentines Day. My friend invited me over for Valentines dinner, because she and I both have long distance relationships. Let me just note here, that he... | 4 | 8 | |
1360978946 | 1360986704 | null | t5_2to41 | 45 | SonofNeckbone: TIFU by asking a widow how her Valentine's Day was
So, I'm a shampoo girl at a hair salon. I was getting a client ready for one of the stylists - she looked to be in her late sixties. As I'm shampooing her hair, I'm going through the typical small talk. Asked how she was, asked about the weather, asked h... | 3 | 15 | |
1360995369 | 1361020656 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,795 | snugglycthulhu: TIFU by letting my boyfriend finish in my mouth...
For Valentine's Day my boyfriend and I went on a beautiful date and ended up finishing off the night back at his place. For quite while I have been trying to convince him to let me give him a blowjob. I know it's weird that a guy would refuse but he say... | 15 | 119.666667 | |
1361038193 | 1361133423 | t3_18n06s | t5_2to41 | -1 | SomeoneNamedLexie: Are you religious?
Falroy: Guys, come on. He asked a valid question and you downvote him?
SomeoneNamedLexie: Who are you talking about?
Falroy: You.
SomeoneNamedLexie: Oh! Yeah. I sound ignorant, but it seems like Milo2caesar would say that if he was religious... I mean, why is this a "shitty sense ... | 7 | -0.142857 | |
1361031401 | 1361210052 | null | t5_2to41 | 562 | Supert0d: TIFU by trying to rescue some tits. [with pictures]
Earlier today I went on a walk to make the most of a lovely day. I'm walking along, minding my own business, when I come across this colourful fluffy mass on the ground. I look a bit closer and I see the most adorable, yet tragic, thing I've ever seen. Two l... | 9 | 62.444444 | |
1361034300 | 1361166086 | null | t5_2to41 | 275 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting wasted and leaving my dirty fleshlight in the bathroom sink while my grandma was staying at our house.
So this happened last week but yada yada yada you know the story.
I recently got a pocket-pussy type thing (not the actual fleshlight). It looks like [this](http://www.shopinprivate.com/r... | 6 | 45.833333 | |
1361010779 | 1361269033 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | DemonicTaco: TIFU by trying to hit an itch
Not much to say except me having a small tingling itch right in between my man jewels. Because I was wearing smooth pants, scratching on the surface would be tricky so rather than being a normal lad by reaching in there and scratching the fuck out of that itch, I began punchin... | 3 | 8.666667 | |
1361033251 | 1361105247 | null | t5_2to41 | 99 | KingKee: TIFU by 'asking' someone to be my Valentine the day after Valentine's Day in the weirdest possible way. Yay.
There is this girl I really like, and we've been texting/talking and flirting for about a month or so.
On Valentine's Day, I thought, "Hey, why not? She likes me, I like her, so I'll ask her to be me... | 3 | 33 | |
1361047370 | 1361055919 | null | t5_2to41 | 25 | InfernoTurnip: TIFU by getting stuck in a lift.
*I apologise for the generic 'stuck in a lift' scenario.*
Admittedly, this was from a couple of years ago - but still, a story is a story. I was on holiday in Austria. There I am, just walking out the hotel with my family , when I thought it'd be a great idea to take the... | 3 | 8.333333 | |
1361059681 | 1361111347 | null | t5_2to41 | 220 | realfuzzhead: TIFU by not backing up my data
Catastophic mechanical hardrive failure out of fucking no where. Just using my laptop, laptop freezes. No choice but to force restart. Oh great, no hard disk detected.
what I lost
3 physics programs I had designed to create gifs for my physics professor to use in his phy... | 6 | 36.666667 | |
1361050362 | 1361083412 | null | t5_2to41 | 216 | urasoul: TIFU by texting my father-in-law: I've fashioned a sling for your penis...
My f-in-law lives 2 states away & was here for yet another of his many 7 day visits. (nice guy, but still.. 7 days? grrr..) No making of the beast with 2 backs while he's here...no way in hell. On day 6, I typed this text from my ... | 5 | 43.2 | |
1361060201 | 1361157533 | null | t5_2to41 | 934 | szekeres81: TIFU by going to the gym
I used to go to the gym lots in high school. I was on the football team, and it was a basic requirement. Fast forward five years, and while I'm not fat, I'm definitely not in shape. So, I found a gym by my house, got a three month pass and went for my first workout today.
I figured... | 9 | 103.777778 | |
1361058424 | 1361135708 | null | t5_2to41 | 49 | pancake_smuggler: Tifu by failing one of my final exams [in college].
:(
dr_walrus: ***:(***
ThatDerpingGuy: :(
dank_hank: :(
[deleted]: :(
coreclick: :(
ifidietellmywifehllo: ):
| 7 | 7 | |
1361064736 | 1361067186 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | jmf101: TIFU by realizing that my college tuition was due two days ago.
Yeah, procrastination at it's finest.
creamersrealm: Dumbass
jmf101: Yup. In every sense of the word.
creamersrealm: It's quite funny though I have been doing the same thing with my homework.
| 4 | 3.5 | |
1361064822 | 1361106096 | null | t5_2to41 | 107 | [deleted]: TIFU in a London hotel.
So me and a group of people are in London for some dance classes in PinApple studio. We are staying in some 4-star hotel. And early today when we came i went to talk to receptionist for our reservation and check in. Behind the counter there was a beautiful young woman. When i was apro... | 3 | 35.666667 | |
1361067260 | 1361119377 | null | t5_2to41 | 142 | [deleted]: TIFU by almost having sex with a friend who has a girlfriend.
After a night of drinking we crashed in his bed. We cuddled to sleep and I woke up with him spooning me from behind. We've had a thing for each other for years, and his morning wood got me going. So I grind on him. We wind up naked but both know i... | 5 | 28.4 | |
1361030242 | 1361155372 | null | t5_2to41 | 38 | NarwhalAttack: Tifu by lighting my hand on fire
Today I cleaned my oil rig (water pipe used to smoke concentrated marijuana) and being low on hash I wanted to smoke the reside within the pipe. Being impatient, I thought I could evaporate the alcohol using my torch, and just keep it far enough from the alcohol everythin... | 7 | 5.428571 | |
1361067294 | 1361137803 | null | t5_2to41 | 43 | Curiousguy12: TIFU by getting in a car accident.
So some fucker is dancing between a two lane road whenever a lane gets fucking clogged (and by clogged I mean he can't fucking brake and wait like a normal person), thinking he'll get to his destination 4 minutes quicker. My previous two attempts to block him from gettin... | 6 | 7.166667 | |
1361070032 | 1361087976 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | thomasatnip: TIFU By Hitting on my Burrito Girl
so there's this girl who works at a burrito place i like.
cool chick, we're friends, have been for a while.
so i'm thinking i'll go here for lunch.
she's working, and i starting talking to her, hitting on her, cuz she's hot and i'm a guy so fuck it, why not.
turns out, ... | 8 | 2 | |
1361078844 | 1361079680 | null | t5_2to41 | 28 | JohnnyBravoThrowaway: TIFU by showing my girlfriend my gay porn.
So I've been dating a girl for about 6 months. I'm bi, and she doesn't know that. I'm more sexually attracted to men, but I have more of an emotional attraction to her. Anyway, today, we were sitting around bullshitting like we usually do. I decided I wan... | 4 | 7 |
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