start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1361066879 | 1361321338 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU By falling asleep drunk in the toilet and breaking a bed.
Alcohol is evil. So basically what happened is me and a couple of my friends got hammered. It got late and I was tired so I asked my friend(the owner of the place) to find me a place to sleep. He told me that I had to sleep in his sisters room(s... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1361080542 | 1361161666 | null | t5_2to41 | 58 | Tyranichomp: TIFU by mixing Taco Bell and Arby's in one day
So today started like any other Saturday. I picked up my buddy from his house and came back to mine to play some GameCube games. We got a bit hungry around 1-ish today and decided to get something we haven't eaten in a while. I offered my dad to buy him lunch ... | 7 | 8.285714 | |
1361081732 | 1361226991 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | lloorren: TIFU by pissing off my childhood hero!
Childhood hero might be a huge overstatement, but man do I feel rotten. I'd been talking to Merle Allin for the past 3 months (The late GG Allin's brother / guitarist for the Murder Junkies) and I completely offended him with a lame joke about him looking like Dale Gribb... | 5 | 3.4 | |
1361085618 | 1361132456 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | wanderingartist: So I emailed my taxes info to a stranger. Reddit what should I do?
I tried contacting gmail and yahoo about retrieving the email. That fail. I'm so lost right now. Freaking out that this person has all my bank info, tax info,. I fuck up big time. Please help.
wanderingartist: Typo and I didn't encrypt... | 3 | 1 | |
1361084807 | 1361092179 | null | t5_2to41 | 54 | GotMyQuillWeaveDid: TIFU by not clipping my toenails
Because my nails are super thick and I have scissors instead of clippers, I tend to forget clipping them every now and then, causing them to get super long and, and some cases, super fragile.
While I was pacing around, killing time by listening to music, I stumbled ... | 3 | 18 | |
1361090539 | 1361211933 | null | t5_2to41 | -62 | SamWolf: TIFU by telling my girlfriend she could date a guy on the side.
Long story short, I'm a lesbian, my girl is bi. I've dated before, she hasn't. I wanted her to be able to experience life to its fullest, so I told her she could date a guy. I think I just fucked up...
Borr: Yeah. You fucked up thinking its ok to ... | 8 | -7.75 | |
1361082032 | 1361113419 | null | t5_2to41 | 18 | TheEternallyRustled: TIFU by not having proper names for the numbers in my phone
It's the start of a glorious weekend. Getting home from a long day, hanging out with close friends, getting the occasional call or text message to jump from one activity to the next. Early evening I receive a text from what I believed, at ... | 3 | 6 | |
1361113143 | 1361131827 | t3_18otev | t5_2to41 | 91 | OldManKamps: Ask your ex what the f*** happened last night
BrainChild95: You don't understand how many possible answers there would be to that question.
But i guess ill have to, i'll see if it can slide by first
17Hongo: "Hey (ex's name), did we have sex last night?"
If you hate her so much then you probably don't ... | 8 | 11.375 | |
1361095127 | 1361115811 | null | t5_2to41 | 28 | itllfit: TIFU by hitting myself in the balls while rolling up and extension cord.
I want to start off by saying, I live in a fairly warm and sunny area. My grass grows nearly year round. So, today I noticed some small weeds are growing next to my fence. I broke out an extension cord and my trusty electric weedeater. A... | 4 | 7 | |
1361107041 | 1361135331 | null | t5_2to41 | 80 | [deleted]: TIFU: by faceplanting on a running machine
I've recently joined a gym, nice place, and I know several people who go there and who work there. This was the 2nd time I’d been there; I go in and start a 1.5km run just off race speed for a warm up. All is going great, a fairly attractive girl is checking me out,... | 5 | 16 | |
1361132990 | 1361219863 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | [deleted]: TIFU by listening to GWaudio on Souncloud which is linked to my FB.
So I was browsing Gone Wild Audio and then eventually I find a recording I actually like. I then proceed to get the deed done. I get off the internet to watch a couple of Cowboy Bebop episodes (Sessions 19-25) I get back on the internet and ... | 5 | 6.2 | |
1361135653 | 1361144495 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting so drunk my friends had to take me to the hospital.
Last night I went to a great party and then continued my fun with friends downtown. The last thing I remember is trying to walk home and falling a lot then the next thing I know I'm in the hospital. I made a complete fool of myself, I thre... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1361141398 | 1361190951 | null | t5_2to41 | 28 | frsp: TIFU by pissing off the most easy-going teacher in my school
OK, this wasn't actually today, since today is Sunday, but I've been away from the internet.
There's a teacher at my school who lost his ability to give a shit shortly before he was born. He just teaches the class, and when his lesson is done for the d... | 3 | 9.333333 | |
1361144811 | 1361152164 | null | t5_2to41 | 717 | kinda_alone: TIFU By not updating the FUOTW in over a month (Mod Post)
As many of you guys pointed out, your humble moderators fell behind quite a bit when it came to updating the Fuck Up of the Week. On behalf of the moderators I would like to apologize to the community of TIFU, but more importantly to the poor souls ... | 7 | 102.428571 | |
1361143252 | 1361226796 | null | t5_2to41 | 546 | [deleted]: TIFU by almost killing my self retrieving a cigarette
As its half term in the UK my parents went on holiday and left my sister to look after me. So I am in my attic room rolling a cigarette (disgusting I know) and I am about to smoke it out my window. My window is very large and has a huge window sill to si... | 10 | 54.6 | |
1361145525 | 1361315022 | null | t5_2to41 | 18 | outinleft-field: TIFU by going tobogganing and breaking my tailbone
So a buddy and I decide to go tobogganing and build a jump. I am the first to try this jump and I landed right on my tailbone. I'm not sure if it's broken but it sure feels that way. Also when I hit the ground I thought shitting my pants was a real pos... | 6 | 3 | |
1361156525 | 1361305340 | null | t5_2to41 | 42 | jennifersalome: TIFU by buying $20 worth of Valentine's Day sale candy.
I was doing pretty well on my "try and not eat so much crap" diet. AND I still have Christmas candy.
Shadekitty: So just...don't eat it? give it out to your friends.
jennifersalome: You're assuming I have friends which is quite a stretch.
aliasev: ... | 7 | 6 | |
1361175258 | 1361307993 | null | t5_2to41 | 154 | NikaNuss: TIFU by slapping my husband in the balls
My husband had the hiccups, so I told him to take a deep breath and I intended to scare him out of it. So, while he held the breath, I slapped at him. Didn't work. So I pretended to slap at his junk. Only, I'm fairly drunk, so... my "pretend" slap turned into a real on... | 5 | 30.8 | |
1361183568 | 1361399035 | null | t5_2to41 | 329 | [deleted]: TIFU at the bar by not flirting back and getting slapped for it
Well let me start by saying I don't like going much to bars but this particular one I only go to because they make a great long island ice tea and thus I have zero interest in flirting or playing these lame ass games of "staring and going in for... | 14 | 23.5 | |
1361196202 | 1361245035 | null | t5_2to41 | 914 | SelectaRx: TIFU by introducing myself to someone I've known for 8 years.
I went to the club tonight to hang out with a friend I hadn't seen in a while. The club is frequented by several people I know and I was having an awesome time reconnecting with people I'd not spoken with in a long time. I went outside to grab so... | 10 | 91.4 | |
1361200360 | 1361254079 | null | t5_2to41 | 61 | ProjectOXCART: TIFU by calling my bisexual girlfriend "my sweet dyke".
Last Saturday night I had been drinking, but not so much that I wasn't in control of myself (or so I thought). Throughout the night I had been texting my girlfriend, with no issues there. The fun started when I told her I wanted to Skype. Apparentl... | 6 | 10.166667 | |
1361218145 | 1361233902 | null | t5_2to41 | 11 | zalloy: TIFU at the grocery store...
Today I went to the grocery store to do my regular shopping. I had a bunch of stuff in my cart, and was near the checkout lanes re-organizing everything into the reusable bags. I also use the self-scanner for most of my stuff, so most everything is scanned and bagged as I go along, ... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1361229962 | 1361247704 | null | t5_2to41 | 29 | [deleted]: TIFU by taking all of my newly prescribed medicine in my first class of the day.
No major meds. Just some stuff to slow down my heart, xanax and zoloft. I tried to space them about 10 minutes apart with sips of water just in case the world started to get hazy, and indeed it did. By 11:00 I was a drooling zom... | 4 | 7.25 | |
1361236388 | 1361248595 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by killing "the mood" with a girl that was interested with me.
Her and i were talking, y'know the whole nine yards. When she did something rather attractive, i started to go ona whole rant about semicolons.
WHY
WHY
WHY
WHY
SoWhen: semicolons are sexy.. uh huhh huhh huhh
A_A_A_A_AAA: ;;;;;;;;)
fox099: ... | 4 | 1 | |
1361241629 | 1361255380 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | that-one_girl: TIFU by lying and stealing.
Confession time.
- Lied and have had actual conversations pretending to be someone in order to manipulate a situation.
and ... unrelated...
- stole a friends property.
cherryblahsome: and your confession is for what purpose?
lizzehness: to bore us, apparently.
| 3 | 1 | |
1361210635 | 1362271385 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | designerdy: TIFU by not moving my hand out of the way...
...of boiling hot pasta sauce. Went to transfer from a saucepan to stockpot and lava sloshed onto my thumb and wrist. One ER visit and two percocet later and I now realize how much I use BOTH hands.
[the result](http://imgur.com/b7YXf4H)
fox099: what the hell i ... | 4 | 3 | |
1361236208 | 1361362713 | null | t5_2to41 | 46 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidentally admitting to my professor and the whole class that I didn't know the main character in the book we are supposed to be reading
So my history class was supposed to have read a book for today's discussion. I didn't read it because I am a lazy college student who realized I could not read t... | 8 | 5.75 | |
1361245964 | 1383644094 | null | t5_2to41 | 2,674 | ShiShoSha: TIFU (10 years ago) by giving the worst response imaginable to "I love you"
I've had this shameful tale under my belt ever since it happened about ten years ago. It's always made a good party story, so I figured I would finally put it out there for the reddit community.
So, in 2002, I'm a 17yo guy. I hav... | 13 | 205.692308 | |
1361244158 | 1361256198 | null | t5_2to41 | 25 | jsidhom: TIFU by saying my college teacher didn't know what she was talking about in her lectures... with her standing behind me.
She specializes in African Art history, but I'm taking a class with her in Early American Art history.
I was talking with other students after class, saying all you really had to do was stu... | 4 | 6.25 | |
1361255146 | 1361854828 | null | t5_2to41 | 98 | Sohcahtoa82: TIFU by having hardcore porn on my laptop screen while sitting in the second row of class
So I'm in class, doing whatever on my laptop like I always do, chatting it up on IRC. Then, someone gives a link to some GIF with no description or context. The usual deal. Its usually something funny, but sometime... | 6 | 16.333333 | |
1361279971 | 1361300141 | null | t5_2to41 | 183 | FranklinFox: TIFUDATE2; went to work in a good mood (turns out it was best fuck up of my life)
Original post http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/17sx2k/tifu_by_going_to_work_in_a_good_mood/
First update http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/183sqq/tifupdate_tifu_by_going_to_work_in_a_good_mood/
Found a new job, an... | 3 | 61 | |
1361287438 | 1361395245 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | Sockrats: Almost breaking up a family
Happened awhile ago, yet still questions still remain.
A few years ago, I had been at a job and had a transfer. Once I saw her, I immediately got those "butterfly" feelings, haven't had those since grade school. Talked to her more and more and find out she's married.
Months have ... | 6 | 4.333333 | |
1361291335 | 1361375472 | null | t5_2to41 | 66 | Lostathebeach: TIFU by sending Staggering Beauty to my office's international counterparts over Skype.
I meant to send this:
http://www.staggeringbeauty.com/
to one of the guys in my office over Skype (we use it for quick office communication.) He's got an odd sense of humour and I think he'd get it.
I accidental... | 6 | 11 | |
1361291744 | 1361305896 | null | t5_2to41 | 11 | MidgetFetish: [meta] "In the past, I fucked up"
I've noticed an increase in these ones getting upvoted to the top lately. If we are going to allow fuck ups from the past to get such positive reception, yall should consider changing the subreddit title to suit all fuck ups.
If we aren't going to allow this, then we ne... | 4 | 2.75 | |
1361296818 | 1361337843 | null | t5_2to41 | -1 | whatnow_browncow: TIFU by buying my partner a punching bag (heavy bag+speed ball) for Valentine's Day...
It's been in the house less than a week. Ze has wanted one for a while...so I found one at a reasonable price and purchased it. It's quite large, 100 lb heavy bag. Maybe I should have opted for a 70 lb bag...because... | 16 | -0.0625 | |
1361305592 | 1361326166 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,591 | PappaCat: TIFU by RickRolling the entire hospital I work for.
I work at the local hospital. I am a ER clerk where I check patients in. They are installing a new voice intercom system to announce when visiting hours are over through the entire hospital. The engineering department did not tell us how this system will ... | 10 | 159.1 | |
1361306979 | 1361413320 | null | t5_2to41 | 134 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting my dick shit on
We were on vacation for the holiday weekend and got really drunk with friends then later at the hotel we were staying at. We went up to the room to get ready to go out later and she was taking a while to get ready in the bathroom while I was watching ESPN. When she finally cam... | 5 | 26.8 | |
1361308329 | 1361374745 | null | t5_2to41 | 57 | benevolentantagonist: TIFU by eating a Kit-Kat bar that expired seven months ago.
I'm sitting in class waiting for our first break of the day and I think to myself "A Kit-Kat would totally redeem this awful day.". So when we are dismissed to break I proceed to procure a tasty treat from the vending machine upstairs.
... | 6 | 9.5 | |
1361309046 | 1361332295 | null | t5_2to41 | 81 | tripsyfag: TIFU by getting in Reddit
Today, I was bored in class so I opened up Reddit on my phone. However, by doing this I also opened the board I last browsed, which happens to be r/pegging. I was in full view of five or six other students and at least two were very close. To make matters worse, my phone froze for a... | 6 | 13.5 | |
1361322291 | 1361328656 | null | t5_2to41 | 64 | tlf9888: TIFU by gluing my ass to the tub.
I'd like to start out by saying this is not my story but one that a friend had shared on facebook, either way I thought you all would enjoy it none the less.
My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, play with the kids. I then had the thought that w... | 3 | 21.333333 | |
1361328831 | 1361554509 | null | t5_2to41 | 37 | hypotyposis: TIFU by using my MMA skills on a mentally ill person (Long)
This happened about 4-5 hours ago. So here it is, several days after Valentines day and I'm walking on my college campus with my girlfriend to go pick up a package her mom had sent her containing lots of Valentines day candy and such.
Well we pic... | 11 | 3.363636 | |
1361330356 | 1361592526 | null | t5_2to41 | 57 | psychonautchris: TIFU by unbeknowingly smoking marijuana covered in trinidad scorpion juice.
Decided to have a cone, completely forgot that a week previously my workmate and I used the smaller pair of scissors (that are never really used for anything) to chop apart a number of ferociously hot Trinidads. Misplacing this... | 6 | 9.5 | |
1361255195 | 1361343209 | null | t5_2to41 | 29 | [deleted]: TIFU By Not Knowing My Professor's Name When She Asked Me During an Activity
This was actually about a week ago, but we'd still been in school for well over a month this semester. We were doing some silly activity or another (it's a Theater 101 class that I'm taking to fulfill a requirement on my way to an ... | 3 | 9.666667 | |
1361333014 | 1361605566 | null | t5_2to41 | 41 | DecayedCandy: TIFU by masturbating
I'm a teenage girl, okay? It was around 10:30 at night. I was talking kind of dirty with my boyfriend and was starting to get turned on. I took my clothes off in bed and began to fap. I rubbed a bit, then i wanted to find something to use as a dildo. I looked around and saw my nightma... | 12 | 3.416667 | |
1361339892 | 1361375529 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | ranshack: I drank my friends beer
He left his two beers in the fridge, and I drank one.
joosha: To abide by the brew code, you owe him a six pack now.
JamesonRx: I thought it was a 1:2 ratio.
joosha: Generally I would say it would be closer to a 1:2 ratio, but it was the guys 2nd last beer. The amount of beer left in t... | 6 | 2 | |
1361342988 | 1361440208 | null | t5_2to41 | 62 | proman3: TIFU by saying I had meningitis instead of the normal run of the mill flu (which I actually had) and got fired.
Last week, I had become sick with the flu and had to miss out on a few days of work. My boss was very understanding of the situation, especially considering that my job was a cashier at my town's com... | 6 | 10.333333 | |
1361345437 | 1361381486 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | Rapsca11i0n: TIFU by eating two full packages of sugarfree gum.
Today I ate two packages of sugarfree gum. Little did I know they act as laxatives. Shit. Literally. A waterfall of shit. It hurt so much. And it still does.
(sorry if I am horrible at writing)
Sir_Dude: I am confused, do you mean you chewed two packs?... | 3 | 16.666667 | |
1361365718 | 1361452289 | null | t5_2to41 | 892 | larholm: TIFU by changing my door handles
I was changing the door handles on the doors to my living room and my bath room, so I start out by unscrewing the old ones completely.
Suddenly I remember that I have to pee, so I head for the toilet in my bath room
- and slam shut the door behind me.
I realized in an ins... | 7 | 127.428571 | |
1361346229 | 1361482337 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | KantoRedFTW: TIFU By Shouting Profanity Near A Popular Deli
So, it wasn't a today actually, more like a few days before last week, that I was having a conversation with my friends as usual. Now, in my school, we go outside to eat lunch, so we're in the neighborhood walking down the street as I already stated, and we... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1361372633 | 1361429823 | null | t5_2to41 | 277 | [deleted]: TIFU by nearly burning my dick off
So...living in an apartment with two other roomates has it's perks. Privacy is rarely one of them, at least as far as masturbation is concerned. To make matters that much difficult, one roomate has a girlfriend who practically lives there, making her the third person who co... | 7 | 39.571429 | |
1361380309 | 1361417697 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | sadtastic: TIFU by telling my boss I did ecstasy.
My boss and we employees have a pretty casual rapport. Just so long as the work gets done, it's fine to joke around and be off the cuff. However, employees who say, smoke weed tend to hide that fact from him.
I was talking to him and somehow let it slip that I'd done e... | 4 | 5.5 | |
1361389638 | 1361391335 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | [deleted]: TIFU by drunk-texting my crush
Well, actually it was last night. I was out drinking with a couple of friends because we were trying to get a friend through hard times. After a number of drinks, I whipped out my phone and texted her, saying that I liked her. I haven't heard back yet.
Fake update: Still nothi... | 5 | 4.6 | |
1361383710 | 1361416837 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | I_am_also_a_Walrus: TIFU by trying to stay up late and study.
Actually this was from last year but I have a lot of fuck ups from my freshmen year of college. Who doesn't?
So it was my first quarter in college and I had an exam in my business law class which was at 8 am (I had no choice in taking the class). I decide... | 5 | 4.4 | |
1361400506 | 1361456914 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | styler_moses: TIFU by running through wet cement. (This was a few years ago)
Okay so I'm walking along a pavement on the way to a cinema and I get to a section that is being re-done. They have traffic cones and tape set up stopping people from going on it.
I step onto the road and keep walking but theres a lot of traf... | 6 | 8.333333 | |
1361410617 | 1361457134 | null | t5_2to41 | 771 | noketchup-plzhalp: TIFU by putting on a hoodie with the hanger still in it.
At 10 this morning I grabbed a red hoodie out of my closet. My clothes hangers also happen to be red. I'm yelling down the hall to my husband that I have to run out and to watch the baby. Then I shove my arms up the sleeves and push my head th... | 9 | 85.666667 | |
1361419675 | 1361475902 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | pinkiemcpink: TIFU by telling off the professor before submitting my final project
I have 2 classes left until I get my bachelors degree. The one I am in now is over next week and I have the same professor for my last class. After a tough day at work yesterday, I decided to have a glass of wine while finishing up my ... | 8 | 2.875 | |
1361423349 | 1361441847 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by not crying because of my father's death
I posted something like this on r/self, but I think it applies here. My dad died this morning and I did not feel upset or sad and I haven't even cried. I know my family and friends are expecting me to feel *something* but I can't. I think the reason is because ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1361432507 | 1361538639 | null | t5_2to41 | 772 | Zacharias3690: TIFU by trying to look cool in front of my girlfriend
Today, my girlfriend and I were walking up to my house, and I see a screwdriver lying in the grass. I decided to pick it up and try to throw it down in our garden with the sharp end in the dirt so I could go back for it later. The only problem is we h... | 9 | 85.777778 | |
1361431246 | 1361535929 | null | t5_2to41 | 74 | xxsmokealotxx: TIFU by making my coworkers think I stuffed
This was actually years ago, but as a teenager who didn't care about separating my laundry, I washed and dried my Mcdonalds uniforms with whatever I happened to have dirty, an experienced the most embarrasing kind of static cling.. as apparently, one of my sock... | 8 | 9.25 | |
1361454856 | 1361496873 | null | t5_2to41 | 264 | climate_change: TIFU by not going to the doctor.
I was supposed to take three internships, 4 month each, in labs in the U.S., Australia and Scandinavia. I am a top of the class student and got these internships by rank, but one requirement was to get a doctors note that I got all the necessary vaccines and that I got n... | 9 | 29.333333 | |
1361461081 | 1361594152 | null | t5_2to41 | 58 | Supdog300: TIFU by spamming everyone
So I woke up this morning and my phone notified me that ten emails, saying message not delivered. I was kind of confused, but I was more focused on getting ready for the day, so I pretty much forgot about it. Around 9 o'clock I got an email asking "is this real or spam?" This was wh... | 9 | 6.444444 | |
1361487093 | 1361497500 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by also missing a deadline.
I read on here earlier today that some guy missed a deadline with a doctor's note, and it inspired me to write this.
I'm a junior in high school, and lucky to be one of the 20 or so kids with a weighted GPA of 4.0 or higher. This qualifies me to be in the National Honor Soc... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1361490421 | 1361492562 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | [deleted]: TIFU:Being the irresponsible person I am...
My best friend awhile back let me "borrow" is iPod touch. It's obviously mine now, but back to the story. I get done with practice, go to my car and as I'm leaving the parking lot this guy starts backing up. So I panic and come to a near miss stop. I am now saying ... | 3 | 4 | |
1361490911 | 1361525036 | null | t5_2to41 | 571 | jazzyd38: TIFU by trying to stick my navel in the shower handle
Today was a real WTF moment for me, while taking a shower, i, for some reason decided I wanted to try to stick my navel in the shower knob type handle. It was a little higher than i thought so i kinda stood on my toes and tried to put it in. While doing th... | 6 | 95.166667 | |
1361494361 | 1361671326 | null | t5_2to41 | 133 | canipaybycheck: 75,000!
Congratulations /r/tifu, we've reached 75,000 subscribers! On March 4, we'll be a year old, but we're still growing at a high rate. A big thank you to everyone who fucks up on a daily basis- we wouldn't be here without you.
As we do at every major subscriber milestone:
Your friendly mod team ... | 5 | 26.6 | |
1361509084 | 1361582976 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by sexting my mom
so my girlfriend and i where sexting and i accidentally told my mom "ill do you so good you wont remember how to bake" so not only did i say something incredibly embarrassing to her but also sexist to a degree. but somehow i played it off like i ment to say it. lol like why god
Sir_Div... | 4 | 1 | |
1361512933 | 1361670072 | null | t5_2to41 | 135 | [deleted]: TIFU by fapping in the shower while sick
Today I fucked up when it happened: I shit myself.
So it began with me starting a new medication which I take before bed. I have a sensitive stomach, so I spent the night alternating between throwing up and shitting my guts out. I woke up on the bathroom cold tile of ... | 11 | 12.272727 | |
1361516574 | 1361521469 | null | t5_2to41 | 77 | [deleted]: TIFU by spooning a girl and ask if I could 'touch her boobies'.
What the fuck, man. I mean jesus we're kissing I'm playing with her hair blah blah blah. At that point I just need to do it and stop being a pussy.
She said 'nope'.
I'm 26 years old.
Anonymousthepeople: Man...That's almost cringe worthy.
no... | 10 | 7.7 | |
1361513136 | 1361567348 | null | t5_2to41 | 122 | [deleted]: TIFU by not following directions
Yesterday I bought some contact solution, the type where you need to use the provided lens container when soaking them in the solution. In my negligence, I threw it away and had my contacts soak in the solution for nearly 9 hours overnight. Woke up today, proceeded to try and... | 5 | 24.4 | |
1361520197 | 1361526854 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | applejuicemonster: TIFU by almost getting some with a girl.
I'm pretty sure we were about to have s@x but i told her that it was my first time and think i blew it.
p.s. sorry for the grammar mistakes.
Anonymousthepeople: Hahahahah. Well you might have blown it, but we know for sure one thing you didn't blow!
*sorry... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1361532506 | 1361594332 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,243 | [deleted]: TIFU - Microbiology
I take a microbiology class and in the lab we work with live bacteria. I was chewing on my pen and then I set it down and my lab partner accidentally grabbed it and shoved it into a Bunsen burner, thinking he had picked up the metal loop (you use this to move bacteria) so he could steril... | 9 | 138.111111 | |
1361260030 | 1361633686 | null | t5_2to41 | 25 | SyntaxEmulator: TIFU by not taking 4 minutes to verify a list and possibly screwing over about 15 people.
I am in the Navy and am in charge of ordering Advancement Exams (taking this exam is part of how we get promoted) for the 2,500+ people onboard my ship. We have a listing of every Sailor onboard and what job they w... | 4 | 6.25 | |
1361512243 | 1361939895 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | ArcticSonata: TIFU by dropping my camera
I went out to take some long-exposure pics, so I brought my tripod with my camera. I noticed a crack on the tripod, where the legs meet the body, but I didn't take any heed of it. I just latched my camera onto the tripod, and decided it was good.
It wasn't. My tripod decided t... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1361540230 | 1361567434 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | iwishitwasnt: TIFU by skulling all of our group work's ginger beer
today, in my science class, we were finally allowed to drink our ginger beer after the yeast has fermented for days. Having had a smaller bottle than the other groups, and with the ginger beer tasting like joan river's shit, I decided to make a bet that... | 3 | 8.666667 | |
1361553257 | 1361686019 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,169 | VaginaFlyTrap: TIFU by getting my bf sick with my toxic vagina.
My SO has been sick on and off for the last few weeks and I just realized that it is me who is making him sick.
I am a Strep carrier and I have also been tested for Group B Strep when I had my son a few years back and that came back positive. GBS is a fo... | 9 | 129.888889 | |
1361551368 | 1361759471 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | thatguyoverthere202: TIFU by mixing up class policies.
Tiny bit of backstory - I'm taking Intro to Physics, Intro to Bio, Ethics, and Spanish. All of which are known to be anything but an easy A.
At the beginning of the semester all of my professors handed out syllabi as most professors do, laying out their class po... | 4 | 5.5 | |
1361572296 | 1362024654 | null | t5_2to41 | 140 | ItsMonty: TIFU - by creating a nice fuck up combo
This happened to me last summer, but I thought I might as well share this chain reaction fuck up. So they day started off as normal and I decided to take a run at the local trail. After my run I decided to drink my Gatorade and sit on the bench right next to the parking... | 6 | 23.333333 | |
1361576970 | 1361578122 | null | t5_2to41 | 15 | Notlebronjames2: TIFU by telling a rape joke to my crush
Well today I tried to explain the 'full on rapist' joke from It's Always Sunny and it didn't seem to go down well. She didn't get it and it caused an awkward situation as she already thinks I'm quite creepy for some reason. @___________________@
Nemo_S: It *might... | 3 | 5 | |
1361582564 | 1361670744 | null | t5_2to41 | 25 | FioraRose: TIFU by rubbing my eye
I laugh now about it. I was making dinner tonight when my eye itched. Like any normal human I rubbed it with the back of my hand. The problem: my hands were full. In the one was uneatable vegetable matter, in my dominate hand were some green onions. I somehow managed to rub my eye not ... | 4 | 6.25 | |
1361581770 | 1361592397 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | jaktheripper: TIFU by giving my mom a chocolate bar from a dispensary...
Let me start this post with giving a little context to the situation at hand. My mother and I often have debates and conversations about controversial matters. She is conservative, but open minded, and I am a liberal, quasi-crazy and intense indiv... | 3 | 4 | |
1361571295 | 1361728576 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | Vanoonah: Tifu by eating chocolate
So it started off as one of my usual after school days. I love chocolate so when I see it...i eat it. I live in a 4 generations house hold with my Great gpa, gramma, mom, and sister. My great grandpa left a box of "chocolates" on the kitchen counter so i decided..."what the hell" and ... | 5 | 10 | |
1361595348 | 1361645204 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | ZondaX15: TIFU by punching someone
I posted this in a very dead thread a while back. It took me a fuckin' ages to write, so I'm posting it here too. So it actually happened two years ago. But it was a pretty big fuckup.
It all happened in 2011. I was just learning to ride a skateboard, so my buddy and I took his $500 ... | 4 | 6.5 | |
1361599306 | 1361676521 | null | t5_2to41 | 56 | HighPressureGoatDork: TIFU by getting a silly tattoo on a whim.
inspired by the poster artist from hyar.
http://imgur.com/a/ICHyM
My family used to watch The Princess Bride quite often when i was young and it reminds me of a simpler time.
edit: my bad, here is the picture [Imgur](http://i.imgur.com/nZcWhQG). TIFU withi... | 4 | 14 | |
1361597058 | 1361649612 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,374 | [deleted]: TIFU by asking how the new baby is :(
I have a customer who is a regular.. Last time I had seen her she was very, very pregnant about to pop. I haven't seen her in well over a month. She came in, no longer pregnant and I asked in a very cheery British voice "So how's the baby??" And my boss' wife gave me th... | 8 | 171.75 | |
1361642126 | 1361658622 | null | t5_2to41 | 98 | throwawayisneeded: TIFU by inviting two women I've slept with to hang out with my GF while I'm at work.
Today, while I'm at work, I asked two girls I used to sleep with to hang out after work. We are all still friends, and its not awkward at all. My girlfriend has Hung out with all of us before. Although, I'm always th... | 12 | 8.166667 | |
1361650351 | 1361652996 | null | t5_2to41 | 38 | [deleted]: TIFU my $500 camera and tripod.
I'll start off with some background info. So I got this camera in mid-November, it's a Canon eos 1100D. I absolutely love it, it's fantastic for amateur photographers wanting to learn the basics. Anyways, I finally got around to getting a tripod for it yesterday. I've been wa... | 7 | 5.428571 | |
1361651473 | 1361828072 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,537 | jazzillaa: TIFU by giving a boy in my class a CD with a track of me peeing
Okay to clarify so it's not AS weird, I record my lectures in class and one day I forgot to turn off voice memos and I went to the bathroom. This one guy wanted to go over my notes (because they are fabulous) so I decided to be nice and burn him... | 13 | 118.230769 | |
1361659181 | 1361733512 | null | t5_2to41 | 89 | Winter_S: TIFU by centering all my rage into a newspaper article, whilst my mother was present.
I was reading the newspaper, as I usually do, and I start to read an article about two teenage youths, terrorising an entire hospital by riding their bikes through the hallways.
This got me really pissed off, and I noticed ... | 9 | 9.888889 | |
1361680850 | 1361683695 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | ThrowawayFuckUp07: TIFU by deciding to have some sexy time with my girlfriend.
This happened today, my parents were going out and my girlfriend wanted to come over after our plans to go to her house had failed. My parents knew she was coming over, everything seems perfect, right? Wrong. My cousin, who has been staying ... | 3 | 1 | |
1361711372 | 1361774759 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,061 | buffalocoinz: TIFU by waking up hungover and proceeding to chug 2 liters of water
I had really bad cotton mouth so I grab my water bottle, fill it, drink it all, and then fill it again and drink it again. I go back to bed and I start feeling nauseous. I went to the bathroom because it was inevitable I was going to vomi... | 13 | 81.615385 | |
1361722192 | 1361725513 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | ferocity562: TIFU by scaring the crap out of myself as I was trying to go to sleep.
So it was the middle of the night. I woke up and was laying in bed with my SO and our dogs (the only living creatures that should be in the house). I am slowly starting to drift back to sleep when a thought suddenly flashes across my br... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1361735443 | 1361830688 | null | t5_2to41 | 148 | MtotheSpain: TIFU by going to the same party as my fuck buddy
I'm currently having awesome sex with this guy who I know is not serious about me at all. I'm not an insanely jealous person, but there's still a bit of it there.
Here's the part where I fucked up: I know he's a man whore and I went to a party where I kne... | 9 | 16.444444 | |
1361736125 | 1361753695 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | Sharkictus: TIFU by spending all day redditing instead of studying
I have two big tests tomorrow, and quiz. And yet I can't cocnetrate and keep coming here.
The only break I had was to fap..
packmuler: "cocnetrate"
[deleted]: Better hope it's not a spelling test.
| 3 | 7.666667 | |
1361739426 | 1361753789 | null | t5_2to41 | 361 | [deleted]: TIFU by sending a picture of me nearly naked to a female co-worker
So, r/tifu, today I fucked up. Big time.
I work in a relatively big company, but that doesn't seem to stop everyone from knowing eachother. I happen to know a pretty boyish female secretary, who's pretty friendly and fun to be around. We hav... | 4 | 90.25 | |
1361746926 | 1361819551 | null | t5_2to41 | 54 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling a girl that her ex-boyfriend "upgraded"
So last night me and my gf invited some friends from school to a party at my friends house. They were two couples and my gf's friend, Nicole.
After playing beer pong for a few hours we decided to smoke. While we were standing around smoking a joint, my... | 6 | 9 | |
1361747520 | 1361839570 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | Gevits: TIFU by allowing my friend's drunk GF grind on me at a party.
We were both fucked up and I don't know if she remembers it (I think she does). As it was happening, I was uncomfortable, but I kinda froze up. It's an awkward situation, but I feel like something needs to be said. Wutdo?
Is it that big of a deal... | 4 | 2 | |
1361750467 | 1361750979 | null | t5_2to41 | -4 | [deleted]: TIFU my buddy at a frat party the pic says it all
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BDxcrcECcAEU9ur.jpg
MustangSallie: So which one in that photo are you?
STLR043: i personally am not but i fucked up in the fact i allowed the red haired guy to kiss that tank lol
| 3 | -1.333333 | |
1361752774 | 1361793432 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | mrsmagneon: TIFU by using a nasal irrigater without cleaning it first
My son has a cold, and as a 16 month old, you can't really get him to blow his nose. So my husband found a version of the netipot for kids, which actually worked really well to clear the backlog of snot from the poor guy's nose. Then I had a thought,... | 3 | 3 | |
1361759084 | 1361784083 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | jakeswife: Bikini Wax or Super Glue (x-post from Funny)
Jack_Vermicelli: I love the easy-to-read paragraph structure.
useless-knowledge: What is with people's obsession with paragraphs, length of stories and yelling TL;DR constantly, etc. Just read it or don't, and if you have such a big problem with the format or the... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1361765871 | 1361821116 | null | t5_2to41 | 938 | Deracinated: TIFU by going commando to yoga class.
My girlfriend is a yoga instructor, and often invites me to her rigorous classes, including one for Sunday morning. I agreed to go the the early 9 am class, and ended up forgetting to set my alarm, or to do my laundry (she asked quite a few days ahead of time). SO ther... | 15 | 62.533333 |
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