start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1423314555 | 1423316927 | t3_2v35po | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by leaving late for my Army drill and possibly saving someone's life
.
Insert_Non_Sequitur: How is that a fuck up?
SimB5: Just an excuse to boast basically
| 3 | 1.333333 | |
1423316837 | 1423375576 | t3_2v3889 | t5_2to41 | 442 | solarpowered_jukebox: TIFU by not packing up after my pleasure-party-for-one [nsfw]
Well this small horror actually began last night. I was laying in bed, trying to sleep but tossing and turning with too much on my mind. I was stressing about work, life, etc., and figured it was a good time to bring out my little frien... | 10 | 44.2 | |
1423317272 | 1423341405 | t3_2v38p6 | t5_2to41 | 25 | nogswarth: TIFU by trusting a fart on two separate occasions in the same location. I don't know what is wrong with me.
My girlfriend is probably going to see this. She's pretty embarrassed about this. I have no shame so I ain't gonna sugarcoat this or use a throwaway.
Last Xmas, a friend of ours - let's call her H - h... | 4 | 6.25 | |
1423319293 | 1423356459 | t3_2v3bad | t5_2to41 | 3 | EngrishStudents: TIFU By not making any friends
Throwaway for obvious reasons.
Okay, I rented out my apartment and asked my friend, whom I knew for a few years if it's okay to stay over at his place. Now, before this, I've been staying at hostels. He said "Sure, come over." So, then he calls me and says he'll be goin... | 6 | 0.5 | |
1423321349 | 1423366981 | t3_2v3e97 | t5_2to41 | 293 | nananathrewn: TIFU by saving my shit for later. NSFW?
Ok so this was not today, but a couple of years back. I was sixteen back then.
Some background: As a kid I would once in a while faint for no obvious reason, happened the first time when I was 6 or 7 if I remember correct.
We had a dog called Molly. Every day after... | 6 | 48.833333 | |
1423322092 | 1423515340 | t3_2v3fjz | t5_2to41 | 2,749 | TheMuddledMajestic: TIFU by masturbating and angering the gods
Super open-ended common title, I know. What could have gone wrong with this redditor's masturbation session.... It's a wonder any of us here at /r/TIFU even masturbate anymore..... Oh but we do.
Anyway, when I originally posted this it had happened this onl... | 11 | 249.909091 | |
1423323046 | 1423325699 | t3_2v3h6l | t5_2to41 | 13 | rood-rallec: TIFU by removing my poop from the toilet
This wasn't today, it was actually about 15 years ago when I was about 8 years old, but I'd still like to share.
I was sleeping over at my friends house and was awoken by an urge to have an early morning bowel movement. This was expected, as I typically went poop e... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1423323356 | 1423323764 | t3_2v3hny | t5_2to41 | 24 | Mr_Shrimp: TIFU by urinating in a bottle at the back of a classroom... NSFW
This TIFU was actually a few years ago when I was 15 and attending secondary school but I have only remembered now, so without further ado I'll begin.
I was in maths class where we had a teacher who was always unable to control the class and t... | 3 | 8 | |
1423324874 | 1423362878 | t3_2v3k7a | t5_2to41 | 103 | BeetsLover: TIFU by not wearing underwear
This pretty much happened two days ago.
As usual, I'm a lazy ass fuck, so laundry is left to be done until it gets really unbearable... With this said, let's just say I had run out of clean boxers, had no boxers left to use at all, for 3 days already, so I thought, "well, I'm ... | 5 | 20.6 | |
1423324396 | 1423348303 | t3_2v3je0 | t5_2to41 | 14 | privatepooper: TIFU by farting on the nurse.
I work as a dietary tech in our hospital. This morning I was in the residential dining room setting things up to serve breakfast. Sometimes the CNAs will come through to get some coffee. Well, today is a weekend so things are pretty quiet. I was certain I was alone, and ... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1423325312 | 1423331348 | t3_2v3kyo | t5_2to41 | 8 | 2SJSlim: TIFU by not screwing the lid on properly
This happened about 10 years ago when I was in college.
I had just broken up with my first real girlfriend. I thought the breakup was very mature and went smoothly. Turns out she became rather vindictive.
About a week later I was in my dorm room when I get a knock o... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1423326003 | 1423327489 | t3_2v3m7u | t5_2to41 | 29 | Pineapple__Juice: TIFU by saying my girlfriend has a wide set vagina
This happened a moment ago, and now she's watching me type this up to shame me infront of the reddit community.
I was joking and might have said "you have a wide -set vagina" and now she's with-holding sex and blowjobs...which are pretty awesome....... | 6 | 4.833333 | |
1423326024 | 1423523396 | t3_2v3ma0 | t5_2to41 | 171 | [deleted]: TIFU up by making a 9/11 joke.
Before I start, I need to make it clear I suffer from horrific social anxiety, my behavior has landed me in bad situations many times, but none like this.
I have recently traveled out of Australia for the first time to follow my dream of seeing the USA, something that never fe... | 29 | 5.896552 | |
1423326584 | 1423523096 | t3_2v3n98 | t5_2to41 | 27 | brookington: TIFU By going on a Date with a Girl off POF
So, this happened on a few weeks ago(and leading up to it), I haven't had a SO or a FB in a while so i started to look through Plenty Of Fish(POF). For those who don't know POF is free dating app. I've been on there a while and had a few dates, and chatted to a f... | 3 | 9 | |
1423327730 | 1423423296 | t3_2v3peb | t5_2to41 | 1,422 | uggggggh: TIFU by walking in on mom masturbating
TIFU by walking in on momma masturbating. This happened in February 2013. After two years of repressing this and not telling anyone, I'm finally ready to get it off my chest. Probably not important but at the time I was a 20 year old female (I'm still female, just not 20... | 13 | 109.384615 | |
1423326261 | 1423485583 | t3_2v3mps | t5_2to41 | 401 | [deleted]: TIFU by ejaculating on a crying woman.
So, I've been seeing this girl for a little while now and it's mostly a sex thing.
One night, we are doing the business. Now, it was already agreed upon that I would finish on her chest because she was into that kind of thing. We were going in missionary so the idea w... | 6 | 66.833333 | |
1423326355 | 1423757298 | t3_2v3mvb | t5_2to41 | 137 | SpankMeSpankMeHarder: TIFU By Letting My Over-Religious Mother Know I Am Into Kinky Sex [NSFW]
So just some back story; I have been dating my boyfriend for almost a year now. We live two hours away from each other and take turns commuting to see one another on the weekends. I currently live with my parents who I love d... | 6 | 22.833333 | |
1423325893 | 1423352691 | t3_2v3lzv | t5_2to41 | 10 | Ificouldslaynoise: TIFU by watching the grudge.
First of all you need to know that i'm 16 and i have ASD.
Link for those interested:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autism_spectrum
Anyway this happened 2 days ago when I came home from school and my parents were off to some dinner and my brother and sisters were on holiday... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1423326642 | 1423443033 | t3_2v3nd3 | t5_2to41 | 90 | ChemicalGoomba: TIFU By leaving my toy guns in my apartment
Well, TIFU. A couple of days ago there was a fire in my apartment building. it didn't affect my apartment though so it was fine. Then a day or two after that, we noticed bugs. appareantly our neighbors are infested, and during the fire the pests ran to the rig... | 14 | 6.428571 | |
1423328924 | 1423360594 | t3_2v3rob | t5_2to41 | 55 | CoolHandBeats: TIFU By accidentally bringing a grinder into a courthouse
I'm a college freshman in Philadephia on a mock trial competition -- the most important one of the year. I have prepared countless hours for this weekend, and am one of the team's best members.
But today, I fucked up because I forgot I had left m... | 7 | 7.857143 | |
1423328228 | 1423411853 | t3_2v3q9i | t5_2to41 | 34 | 8818nate: TIFU by being a male nursing student NSFW (slightly)
So I'm going to try to keep this short and sweet..
I am 19, a male, a nursing student, and I have clinicals Thursdays and Fridays. This rotation we are at OB (yay babies and new mothers).
Well, as a nursing student, we do head to toe assessments (viewing... | 3 | 11.333333 | |
1423329620 | 1423415147 | t3_2v3t0b | t5_2to41 | 23 | swizzelstick2: TIFU by throwing my boyfriends ps4 at a wall
This happened last night, wasn't going to post it but it really was a royal fuck up. Also this is the first time I've posted on reddit so apologies if it's not right! Anyway.. Me and my boyfriend went out last night, nothing big just the pub, but I ended up ge... | 5 | 4.6 | |
1423329950 | 1423350463 | t3_2v3tni | t5_2to41 | 14 | Yamago: TIFU: Getting Bored and Posting this on OK Cupid
Long time lurker and first time poster. So this happened yesterday while I was bored and trying to be humorous. I joined OK Cupid just to pass the time and who knows....maybe I would meet someone cool to chat with. Needless to say, my idea of humor did not bode w... | 4 | 3.5 | |
1423331702 | 1423365785 | t3_2v3x1i | t5_2to41 | 10 | aluualuu: TIFU by thinking I could tattoo myself
It's my dream career to be a tattoo artist, but the golden rule is to never tattoo yourself. Beyond the bad results if you are looking for an apprenticeship and you've got an obvious home-brew tattoo, the chances of you being taking on are slim to none. But i'm a young M... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1423331805 | 1423384376 | t3_2v3x8m | t5_2to41 | 479 | Noxianguillotine: TIFU by accepting a BJ from my GF [NSFW]
Okay reddit, i wasn't sure about posting that one because i know my (22M) girlfriend (21F) is browsing reddit from time to time. Safe thing is i'm almost sure she doesn't browse /r/TIFU, so i got that going for me, wich is nice.
It happened last month. It's q... | 7 | 68.428571 | |
1423333611 | 1423334379 | t3_2v40sw | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by sinking a ship called "The titanic"
Zoepapillon: This wasn't really offensive as much as it was unfunny, just seriously not humorous. And it's a shame because if you were really a funny guy/girl/xenoblobblefirshiwth or whatever Tumblrnoun, you wouldn't have wrecked an admittedly clever concept. Howe... | 3 | 1 | |
1423334336 | 1423346105 | t3_2v42bo | t5_2to41 | 5 | dragontsuki: TIFU by looking for sunglasses
Some background: My boyfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship because of his job. He drives about 5 1/2 hours every other weekend to come see me. This weekend was one of the weekends he drove down. About 40 minutes ago, we decided to take both of my dogs to the dog ... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1423334856 | 1423468719 | t3_2v43eq | t5_2to41 | 527 | TheOriginalSquigle: TIFU By answering a question in class while on reddit
I am currently attending my Sophomore year of High School. I was sitting in my 5th period, Bio-Med, and we were talking about the endocrine system. Now most of the time I am browsing Reddit on my phone so I hardly pay attention. We are talking ab... | 10 | 52.7 | |
1423337372 | 1423342301 | t3_2v48m6 | t5_2to41 | 17 | Jensational: TIFU by leaving my phone logged on to reddit
So I recently joined reddit after being a long time lurker, with the intention of talking dirty with people on here through kik. I'm married and have always enjoyed cyber sex and online roleplaying, since before I met my husband. I've always managed to keep this... | 8 | 2.125 | |
1423333350 | 1423338532 | t3_2v40b1 | t5_2to41 | 51 | 0valpants: 'TIFU' Thinking my son was potty trained...
You know where this is going, but it is so much worse. As a mother I've become desensitized to gross when it comes to children. So I thought.
Its been a nice frosty winter and we haven't been getting out of the house much. I decide I'm going to take my two toddler... | 3 | 17 | |
1423335153 | 1423340345 | t3_2v441h | t5_2to41 | 19 | faraway__throwaway: TIFU by keeping our marriage a secret from my wife's father, all 3 other parents knew.
So this fuck-up like many fuck-ups posted here didn't exactly happen today, but the accumulated actions crescendo'd earlier in the week. Anyways here goes...
* Several months ago, my fiancee and I decided it woul... | 8 | 2.375 | |
1423339508 | 1423343548 | t3_2v4cy1 | t5_2to41 | 10 | StJupiter: TIFU by sniffing my dads ball sweat
Oh gosh. I can still smell it. *shudders*
Before I throw up, let me tell you the story (however brief) of how I managed to heartily sniff the sweaty, stankiness that is my dads ball sweat.
My dad decided it would be a GREAT idea to buy us a pair of the same underwear be... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1423339647 | 1661667203 | t3_2v4d8d | t5_2to41 | 6 | VirgilFox: TIFU by trying to get a massage with a happy ending
This happened earlier this week.
Not even sure what to say. I'm horrified. My friend was encouraging me to go to an Asian Massage Parlor. So, while I was in Atlanta, I decided to go for it. Well, I walk up to the place and the windows are all blacked out a... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1423340707 | 1423344819 | t3_2v4f7d | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by persuading my boyfriend to try something I read on /r/sex (nsfw)
(Very new to Reddit so forgive me for any sins please)
Well TIFU... I am a frustrated, 23yo stay at home Mum with a very high sex drive. I literally think about sex alllll the time, play with my vibrator every day, have sex every night... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1423338545 | 1423398000 | t3_2v4azz | t5_2to41 | 783 | pinklyfe: TIFU by hiding in the shower.
My boyfriend was getting ready to shower and being the prankster that I am I hide in the shower before he makes it in the bathroom with the intention of scaring the shit out of him as he opens the curtain to get in. I am squatting down I hear the door lock and the toilet lid. At ... | 12 | 65.25 | |
1423341480 | 1423378655 | t3_2v4goo | t5_2to41 | 56 | [deleted]: TIFU by letting a roomba clean the house I was housesitting.
In the bitter cold state I live in, my parent's wealthy friends decided to take a nice warm vacation, and had offered to pay me a pretty penny to watch their house and dog while they were gone.
Before they left, they demonstrated their miracle cle... | 3 | 18.666667 | |
1423343027 | 1423365460 | t3_2v4jle | t5_2to41 | 12 | imdun: TIFU by groping a friend
So this didn't happen today, rather a few days ago. So the night before a couple friends came over to my house to hang out, no more than 10. So we drank, we smoked, we chilled, just like any other night. The person I groped, lets call her Sally, so Sally wanted to come too. But she was c... | 6 | 2 | |
1423343932 | 1423403776 | t3_2v4l9q | t5_2to41 | 6,339 | GalacticBanana15: TIFU by being deaf.
I'm partially deaf in both ears, and have been since birth.
The technology I use to get through school life consists of a receiver that connects to my hearing aid, and a microphone that teachers have to wear so I can hear them in class, it acts as a kind of walkie talkie type of th... | 16 | 396.1875 | |
1423343875 | 1423345194 | t3_2v4l5c | t5_2to41 | 19 | [deleted]: TIFU by sitting in a massage chair at Planet Fitness
Ok guys, here we go
So I was finished with a heavy workout at the gym, so I decide to go over to the massage chairs near the entrance to cool off. It's there I found this guy sitting by himself at the far end of the room, so I thought I'd keep him company... | 3 | 6.333333 | |
1423343447 | 1423353322 | t3_2v4kc7 | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to take a shower.
Well reddit so yesterday I woke up around 6pm. I work the graveyard shift, and I'm lazy so whatever. I went to go make dinner, a kinda Lame dinner. I'm on keto so I chopped up some bacon and hot dogs and cooked them up. Well after handling the raw bacon, I went to go wash my ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1423345583 | 1423354228 | t3_2v4ojk | t5_2to41 | 7 | ToTouchAnEmu: TIFU by messaging my friend on Facebook.
I heard my friend's wife had recently left him, so I wanted to write him a message asking how he was doing. We haven't spoken in a while, so I had forgotten what our last conversation was about... until after I sent the new message.
The last message between us wa... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1423344882 | 1423358850 | t3_2v4n5z | t5_2to41 | 12 | 1CH00S340U: TIFU by going to the doctor for a full check up..
So this happened years ago, but I don't think Reddit existed yet. So I would have been 26 at the time and I figure I should start going for yearly check ups. So I go the the doctors and get the full deal, and as it turns out I have phimosis. For those who do... | 5 | 2.4 | |
1423346755 | 1423347059 | t3_2v4qwi | t5_2to41 | 6 | ashkat2424: TIFU by not making my bed and washing my sheets
Saturdays are cleaning days for me and I decided to organize my closet. As many girls know, this is a huge undertaking and can take over your entire day. Somewhere along the way I realized that I hadn't washed my sheets in a couple of weeks, so I decided to th... | 3 | 2 | |
1423347090 | 1423366050 | t3_2v4rjr | t5_2to41 | 180 | ChampagneCJ: TIFU by getting pepper-sprayed.
This was late last night. After a night out drinking, one of my friends started telling us about some guy who is stalking her, calling her and just overall weird scenarios that creeped her out. This lead her to mention she bought pepper spray for protection. Of course I thin... | 6 | 30 | |
1423348393 | 1423354373 | t3_2v4u5k | t5_2to41 | 8 | AusGoss: TIFU by Watching Game of Thrones
So I have been getting into Game of Thrones recently and I have been watching it late at night before bed. Last night I just didn't get to bed until about 7am. So I put on Game of Thrones and it seems that I had fell asleep pretty quickly.
Let me also say that I am currently ... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1423349215 | 1423350074 | t3_2v4vpf | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by being a social media shitter
Well reddit, I fucked up again..
So yesterday I was over at a friends house and needed to take a dump. Also, I was wearing shorts that day (Will become relevant later). Now, I don't know about you but I don't like to be bored while I'm doing my business so I normally tak... | 3 | 2 | |
1423349522 | 1423353031 | t3_2v4w9u | t5_2to41 | 38 | Deathoftheauthor: TIFU By getting disowned by my dad.
So heres some background. I'm a 13 year old asian child who likes to pc game. Gaming is my life so to say.
However my parents aren't so keen on it. They think its the work of the devil and only "madmen" play it (even when evidence is shown that it's the consumed ... | 11 | 3.454545 | |
1423349340 | 1423499895 | t3_2v4vyh | t5_2to41 | 34 | [deleted]: [NSFW] TIFU by calling my girlfriend of 2 years by my ex-girlfriends name during sex
I'm a Senior in high school in Indiana and I fucked up bad.
Let's start off by giving some background information. My ex-girlfriend( let's call her Mary, and about 2.5 years ago) treated me terribly and I was emotionally an... | 7 | 4.857143 | |
1423349760 | 1423431461 | t3_2v4wpi | t5_2to41 | 22 | bruce_bogtraughter: TIFU by buying my girlfriend a vibrator [NSFW]
Disclaimer: the fuck up started with a Christmas gift, the consequence took place on Monday.
So I had been planning on moving about 300 miles away from my girlfriend of nearly 5 years to attend a computer programming bootcamp. In the light of my absenc... | 6 | 3.666667 | |
1423349464 | 1423356528 | t3_2v4w6e | t5_2to41 | 11 | JohnnyAD23: TIFU by mistaking the fridge for the freezer
FU actually happened last night but I learnt about my mistake today.
So I work at McDonald's in a mall food court. Yesterday was the same as most days, extremely hectic, tons of orders, running around, etc, etc. So closing time came around and we were restocking... | 4 | 2.75 | |
1423350821 | 1423363741 | t3_2v4yox | t5_2to41 | 137 | The_Guy_Downstairs: TIFU by being a 3 year old boy
*as told through the eyes of my 3 year old son... short and sweet.
Unlike a good amount of TIFU stories, this actually happened today... so being a 3 year old, i have many interests, from riding bikes and eating grilled cheese... to peeing outside and and busting my l... | 5 | 27.4 | |
1423348806 | 1423434543 | t3_2v4uxx | t5_2to41 | 18 | ScorpioEverlast: Tifu and got kicked out of Tractor Supply Co.
Once a month, a local pet adoption association sets up at TSC and does nail trimming for dogs for $5. My Fiance' and I took out dachshund out to get her nails trimmed.
We were in line and a lady a few people in front of us at the front of the line had a C... | 5 | 3.6 | |
1423351846 | 1423372639 | t3_2v50m1 | t5_2to41 | 1 | Varlario: TIFU by getting a flu shot.
Disclaimer or whatever you call it: I am not an anti-vaxxer, I get all the shots. Anyways, this happened back in October, I know T means today. Pardon me. So it was late October when this flu season's first flu vaccines became available. Now, I had no clue this would happen but I k... | 6 | 0.166667 | |
1423351560 | 1423354194 | t3_2v502c | t5_2to41 | 5 | GOD_DOESNT_DO_SHIT: TIFU by trying to have sex with a lesbian chick (NSFW)
TLDR: Jizzed too early, made a girl a lesbian
Lemme just start out by saying that this girl was bi to say the least.
Now, I met her around 2 days ago and we got along pretty well and she started texting me a good amount afterwards. Fast forwar... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1423352564 | 1423386813 | t3_2v51yx | t5_2to41 | 64 | DankCorgis: TIFU by blowing up "balloons"
This happened years ago, but its probably the best story I have.
Me and my friend ( 6-7 y/o ) were playing on the playground and suddenly we found blue balloons lying on the bench! We began blowing these balloons up, giggling and having a jolly good time as we did so. My frien... | 4 | 16 | |
1423332891 | 1423429986 | t3_2v3zdu | t5_2to41 | 9 | AssertiveCollective: TIFU and drank a jar of ants
I've been getting really bad dry mouth at night recently, so instead of having to get up and walk to the kitchen multiple times; I thought I'd save myself some sleep and fill a large mason jar with water. Woke up 6-7 times, and chugged the water from the jar.
Last summ... | 3 | 3 | |
1423353481 | 1423361016 | t3_2v53pc | t5_2to41 | 135 | lizmaebrooks: TIFU by using the Lord's name in vain at work.
I'm a seventeen year old girl who is attempting to save up for the immense cost of a college education by working at my local McDonald's. I live in a tiny town where employment options for students are limited. This morning when I was at work, everything was ... | 7 | 19.285714 | |
1423352907 | 1423361040 | t3_2v52me | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by keeping a old milkshake on my desk for 3+ weeks
This happened literally 10 minutes ago so, yay, a real TIFU
So almost every night I go out and eat Brusters Ice Cream milkshakes, no idea why but holy hell I love it. Well on my desk I put one I was drinking at the time down, but ran to go run errands ... | 3 | 2 | |
1423353297 | 1423399550 | t3_2v53bt | t5_2to41 | 169 | MrDub72off: TIFU by being labeled the creepy guy who jerks off to deaf girls, all because of my taste in music.
I've posted this before on a different sub so here I go. This was a very long time ago but a couple of weeks ago I met up with a friend I've known since Junior High and he was more than happy to retell this s... | 8 | 21.125 | |
1423352532 | 1423367476 | t3_2v51wq | t5_2to41 | 2 | F-Tip: TIFU by not trying to look like a racist
i already submitted something about this earlier but it didnt have the full story so here we go.
last night i was walking home from a party. unfortunately the party wasnt in the best neighborhood in my city so i had to walk through some pretty bad areas for about 15 mi... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1423354578 | 1423355753 | t3_2v55ou | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by confusing things in my relationship
Okay, I've been in a relationship for nearly 4 months. In the beginning, I was madly in love with him, don't get me wrong I still love him, but I just never felt this way about a guy before.
Well, lately, things have changed, and we don't talk as much, I... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1423354721 | 1423418515 | t3_2v55xx | t5_2to41 | 325 | jackaloper92: TIFU by borrowing an SD card from my parents' bedroom.
Like many of the posts here, this didn't happen today, but about 3 years ago.
I had just bought a new tablet around Christmas time and wanted to put some videos, e-books, ROMs, and such on it from my computer. My computer has an SD card slot and so ... | 11 | 29.545455 | |
1423355593 | 1423356112 | t3_2v57hr | t5_2to41 | 3 | PureSmoulder: TIFU by underestimating the strength of my penis
I always thought shooting cum like a meter away was just a myth from porn flicks. And I couldn't exactly confirm this since asking a Bro how far he comes is kind of weird.
So everytime I masturbated, it always just spurts out a little and coats the tip w... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1423354684 | 1423362168 | t3_2v55v1 | t5_2to41 | 27 | Finsceal: TIFU By flashing my landlord
This is a real TIFU because it happened 10 mins ago.
I'll set the scene. I'm a photographer and I just did a full day wedding job which isn't something I'd usually take on. Thats 10am to just before midnight, on my feet and herding people around etc etc. Obviously for a wedding ... | 5 | 5.4 | |
1423356341 | 1423359222 | t3_2v58tc | t5_2to41 | 37 | teetole: TIFU by telling a dirty joke in front of my whole family.
My parents, my niece, nephews & my son were all gathered around the TV tonight watching some fun illusion videos.
So I remembered one I read on the Internet...
"If you act like you're sprinkling salt on your tongue, your brain thinks it can actua... | 3 | 12.333333 | |
1423342865 | 1423433024 | t3_2v4j9y | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: Today I fucked up by liking a photo on Instagram
So I don't really use Instagram... But I have one. Usually I use it to see what's going on. I stumbled upon a really pretty girl, and her profile contained a picture of her and her friends at the beach in swim suits. Let's get a closer look I thought, double t... | 4 | 2 | |
1423356959 | 1423425631 | t3_2v59y0 | t5_2to41 | 484 | Biggie_G: TIFU by telling a seventh grader I wanted I wanted to have sex with her mom
I am a middle school teacher and we have a school newspaper which conducts numerous polls. The following question occurred as a potential poll.
Two seventh graders walk up to me in the morning and ask, "Mr. biggie_g, as a single per... | 6 | 80.666667 | |
1423359868 | 1423373377 | t3_2v5f66 | t5_2to41 | 102 | xVoloVx: TIFU by having a bad password
Hey guys, I just had a rather embarrassing moment that I would like to share with you all.
So the story all starts off with Apple ID's password making system, where you have to have at least 1 capital letter in the password.
Now, I have one password that I use for (mostly) eve... | 6 | 17 | |
1423350646 | 1423361085 | t3_2v4yde | t5_2to41 | 21 | foeman: TIFU by locking my house
This happened literally 10 minutes ago and as I started writing this I was sitting in McDonalds waiting for the clerk to finish her lunch break
I came back from my volunteer program orientation meeting, my parents are not home, I want to access my household by going through the balcony... | 3 | 7 | |
1423360752 | 1423361717 | t3_2v5grj | t5_2to41 | 18 | [deleted]: TIFU by having an inopportune nosebleed
This actually happened today unlike most other posts. For clarity, I'm a guy lol.
Anyways, today I was at this massive waterpark having a complete blast. Just before I was about to go get changed and leave, I decide to go in the hot tub quickly. I'm enjoying the water... | 3 | 6 | |
1423362908 | 1423405900 | t3_2v5kji | t5_2to41 | 3,781 | Reideas: TIFU by trying to have a daugther.
frigofflayhey1: I would get dna done before i jump to conclusions. My husband and i were both told we would never have children and that he doesnt produce sperm. We have 3 kids all of which are his. I confirmed by dna to him for peace of mind. Just because a doctor says its ... | 9 | 420.111111 | |
1423359197 | 1423415229 | t3_2v5dxl | t5_2to41 | 21 | HWTneub68: TIFU by trusting a hot pocket fart
I will never doubt Jim Gaffugan again. This happened Wednesday.
Let me set the scene. I get home from work. I decide to get a little snack. 2 pepperoni hot pockets. They're fucking delicious. Boiling hot, but delicious. Then I decide to settle in for the night. Freshly sho... | 5 | 4.2 | |
1423363520 | 1423592646 | t3_2v5lln | t5_2to41 | 6 | sempiternal_cow: TIFU by trying to be supportive
Today I fucked up by telling a suicidal girl to "just hang in there." Before realising how badly I had fucked up. I should have used different words. She didn't miss it either, she thought I was being rude rather than supportive.
CasualHello72: Listen, I don't want to s... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1423363466 | 1423386509 | t3_2v5lii | t5_2to41 | 8 | HighTreason25: TIFU by eating at Denny's. NSFW?
This was a good one. For some context on the status of my stomach, I had a cup of coffee, loaded with creamer, at around 8:30. That's it. Me, my mom, and my grandpa all go out to eat at Denny's. I get the Philly Cheese Steak Skillet meal. It's got eggs, potatoes, peppers,... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1423363007 | 1423414114 | t3_2v5kp5 | t5_2to41 | 168 | Nobody_Has_3_Dicks: TIFU by drinking tea incorrectly.
This fuck up happened last week. I was drinking tea and talking with the guy I've just started dating, Kevin, at his apartment and it was going great. The tea was imported and it was very strong.
So usually after drinking tea, I take my spoon and squeeze the last bi... | 6 | 28 | |
1423348610 | 1423392776 | t3_2v4ukg | t5_2to41 | 9 | wasabi4breakfast: TIFU by wasting money >->
So I was casually strolling through the Steam community markets when I remembered that I was going to buy some Duck Tokens (ikr wtf was I thinking). These add levels to Duck Badges on TF2 or some shit. So I bought about 3 of these for about £1.92. Alas, to add to the in... | 3 | 3 | |
1423366409 | 1423441202 | t3_2v5qfv | t5_2to41 | 894 | screweduprealgood: TIFU by trying to quietly masturbate in a room that I share with a room mate.
I attend an ultra-conservative christian school (I do believe the religion whole heartedly but I got into a bad habit). I am also female.
Part of the agreement of my eligibility to attend this school was that I refrained... | 13 | 68.769231 | |
1423366430 | 1423367546 | t3_2v5qgw | t5_2to41 | 7 | goldendecorations: TIFU for not realizing that I was on a date, and made it seem like I wasn't interested.
TIFU for not realizing that I was on a date, and made it seem like I wasn't interested. Warning: Sorry for the wall of text.
First, a little back story to explain my situation. I've been on a dating hiatus for w... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1423365985 | 1423381096 | t3_2v5pql | t5_2to41 | 15 | avsfantrumpetman: TIFU by telling students about a dream
This occurred in November.
I am a high school band director, and right before thanksgiving break I was definitely feeling stressed. This showed itself in a dream I had the Thursday night before break where my trumpet section was kicking me mercilessly as I lay ... | 3 | 5 | |
1423367089 | 1423437161 | t3_2v5rlm | t5_2to41 | 14 | YakiOniGiri: TIFU by refusing to say no to a 13yo salesman
I opened my door to this little kid supposedly selling newspapers for his college scholarship. For some reason, I actually consider the proposition (guess I showed weakness) and he stepped into my doorway further pressuring me. I never said no the kid and just ... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1423369314 | 1423370642 | t3_2v5v88 | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting wasted and punching a plate
This happened a few months ago but i thought i would share it, i was pissed out of my face and me and my missus started having a massive row. I have a tendency to do stupid shit when im drunk and she started giving me lip and for some reason i just punched the pla... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1423369966 | 1423419774 | t3_2v5waj | t5_2to41 | 432 | [deleted]: TIFU By giving my really drunk boyfriend a 9v battery
So, my boyfriend came home tonight completely obliterated, and after he spent half an hour on the back deck puking his guts out, he came in (crawled in) and apologized because I'm a month preggers and he tells me he feels like shit. I laughed at him and t... | 6 | 72 | |
1423369743 | 1423373326 | t3_2v5vxk | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by winning a game battleship
So I somehow ended playing battleship with the girl who I've had a crush on for the past year... So I
thought that it would be an excellent idea to confess by arranging all my pieces into a heart... But then I randomly get super luck and start hitting her ships left and rig... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1423369988 | 1423435881 | t3_2v5wc1 | t5_2to41 | 12 | JooshBeextin: TIFU by leaving a pervy friend unattended.
*Actually happened when I was 12 years old, but it still makes a good fuck up story.*
I was bored at home, so I decide to invite a friend over. Friend comes over, and we hang out. At one point, we were watching videos on the internet. I have to leave the room... | 5 | 2.4 | |
1423369884 | 1423384452 | t3_2v5w61 | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by sharting in the shower in front of my girlfriend
Sorry about gumming up TIFU with another shit story, but it's the best that I've got.
I love shower farts. I don't know what it is about them, but I just can't get enough. If someone would like to weigh in on why shower farts smell, feel, and linger ... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1423372209 | 1423436340 | t3_2v5zsn | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by lying about my student's grades
TIFU reddit
I am a first year high school math teacher. My administrators told me I was failing too many students and pressured me to fudge the numbers in my gradebook by essentially threatening to fire me.
I caved and gave my students essentially enough extra credi... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1423371222 | 1423384978 | t3_2v5ybs | t5_2to41 | 16 | rouges: TIFU by telling my roommate his breath stinks
This happened a couple of weeks back and it all started when my roommate started giving me rides back from school since my car decided to stop working.
So on a tuesday around 6 pm me and my roommate, lets call him Frank, met in front of his building and started w... | 6 | 2.666667 | |
1423372368 | 1423373458 | t3_2v601f | t5_2to41 | 42 | TigersFan01: TIFU by not wanting to listen to my friends feelings...
Oh reddit, this could perhaps be the biggest fuck-up that I will ever encounter. I've never been good at "reddit-ing" and making TIFU's so, bare with me. This is my fuck-up.
About six months ago, I met this guy while playing Call of Duty on PS3. He ... | 3 | 14 | |
1423372965 | 1423390468 | t3_2v60ye | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: tifu by having sex while wearing a cheerleading costume (nsfw)
This happened a few months ago, right after Halloween.
I work at a party store and soon after Halloween, we were having a clearance sale. All of our costumes were 50% off. I wanted to get a sexy little treat for my boyfriend, so I decided on a ... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1423373115 | 1423392195 | t3_2v614w | t5_2to41 | 14 | thisismysub: TIFU by trying online dating
I've had a "summit girl" for way too long and have fooled myself for too long that something would happen there.
Finally work up the willpower to create a profile and get myself out there. I start chatting up a few girls and really start clicking with one, while initially s... | 5 | 2.8 | |
1423373334 | 1423375518 | t3_2v61gi | t5_2to41 | 3 | ajaen: TIFU by accidentally sharing my purchase
-Glitterous-: it could have been [worse.](http://www.amazon.com/Passion-Natural-Water-Based-Lubricant-Gallon/dp/B005MR3IVO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1423373908&sr=8-1&keywords=55+gallon+drum+of+lube)
Knot_My_Name: Omg the reviews are priceless!
-Glitterous-: I k... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1423372954 | 1423380788 | t3_2v60xr | t5_2to41 | 11 | [deleted]: TIFU by breaking a girl with my dick
Well it wasn't actually today, it was last night but anyways, yesterday I was a little bored and messing around on tinder trying out terrible pick up lines. I started messaging one girl I matched with, and she invited me to come over that night. We met up for food at a ... | 10 | 1.1 | |
1423362239 | 1424393201 | t3_2v5jcs | t5_2to41 | 8 | vompton: TIFU by not moving into a crackden share house, ruining my chances of hooking up with a hot Swedish girl.
TIFU by not moving into a shitty share house that had a really hot roommate.
Yesterday I went looking for a share house to move in to. I arrived at this place that was really dingy and gross. The girl tha... | 8 | 1 | |
1423374080 | 1423381630 | t3_2v62i0 | t5_2to41 | 12 | Fatass_McGee: TIFU By almost dying ... twice
This fuck up begins at about 10 am this morning when me (14 M Asian) and my dad (36 M White) are driving to his office About 10-15 minutes away from where we live, to meet his coworker and get a safe from some guy in the newspaper classifieds. Me and my dad are 5 minutes int... | 3 | 4 | |
1423376032 | 1423377094 | t3_2v656m | t5_2to41 | 4 | tiredguyistired: Tifu by not being a little proactive for my mom's birthday.
Boiled_Potatoe: Dude, it's not your fault that you forgot since you were stressed.
tiredguyistired: If it's not than I just feel left out for no reason. My family isn't the passive aggressive type or anything. We're all close. I'm just dumbfo... | 4 | 1 | |
1423375722 | 1423377360 | t3_2v64qe | t5_2to41 | 3 | KikiFlowers: TIFU by using hair dye.
So I finally decided to use this "SPLAT Lusty Lavender" Hair Dye. As it so happens, I managed to not completely dye it. There's some bits of my natural hair sticking out, along with the bleach blonde. Along with the stained scalp, and bits of dye on my forehead. I'm going to have to... | 3 | 1 | |
1423377174 | 1423413117 | t3_2v66n4 | t5_2to41 | 32 | RidleyConfirmed: TIFU by giving free WiFi to my entire apartment complex.
TL;DR = I broadcasted two WiFi signals for two years, one of them unsecured, without realizing it.
I moved into my apartment two years ago and took with me a Linksys wireless router I had obtained through illegitimate means ( I suppose this is a... | 3 | 10.666667 | |
1423379724 | 1423399238 | t3_2v69lo | t5_2to41 | 19 | notmyrealaccount120: TIFU by trying to squirt.
This actually happened last weekend during the big game and this is a re-post because I posted it on a Monday. As everyone knows the super bowl was last weekendand I was at a super bowl party with family and family friends. Well a guy friend of mine (who I've recently been... | 3 | 6.333333 | |
1423377986 | 1423432792 | t3_2v67lg | t5_2to41 | 15 | Superman621: TIFU by thinking my Mom's dog was eating my cats.
** Disclaimer** This happened a few weekends ago (of course) and I've been meaning to type it up, but have been busy. Well yesterday I had a vasectomy, so today I am just sitting here hopped up on hydrocodones, with a bag of frozen peas on my boys, and all ... | 4 | 3.75 | |
1423380086 | 1423415351 | t3_2v6a06 | t5_2to41 | 177 | _Do_A_Barrel_Roll_: TIFU by farting myself awake in a quiet university library
Long time lurker, first time poster. Never felt a reason to post before.
Context: I'm a third year medical student (age 24) and have a tough exam coming up.
To maximize my focus, I decided to go the undergraduate library. I generally despi... | 4 | 44.25 |
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