start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1426030867 | 1426092695 | t3_2ymacd | t5_2to41 | 49 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to make my children a healthy snack [NSFW] pictures inside
So my kids want a snack and are willing to eat an apple. I was visiting my mom and she had just bought a new apple slicer/corer from IKEA and handed it to me while I was looking for a knife.
I decided to just use the apple slicer e... | 10 | 4.9 | |
1426030309 | 1426083617 | t3_2ym95g | t5_2to41 | 20 | jordmoon: TIFU by putting my middle finger up at another driver
This literally happened an hour ago, and I'm still shaking. I was driving back from the gym as per usual at about 10.15pm; My usual route has a rather inconvient diversion which means I have to go back round the roundabout and through another part of my... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1426032181 | 1426082500 | t3_2ymd53 | t5_2to41 | 11 | CarnivorousGazelle: TIFU by opening my phone
My iPhone is 3 years old. So, of course, there are a few quirks that have accumulated over the years. I decided to fix the home button a few weeks ago, and it worked perfectly! Today, I noticed that the power button on the top wasn't working, so I took it apart, fixed that, ... | 6 | 1.833333 | |
1426032222 | 1426158440 | t3_2ymd8a | t5_2to41 | 40 | MikeDmorris: TIFU by inadvertently sending a picture of my genitalia to most of my co-workers
So quick background, I am pretty close with most of the people I work with and we hang out from time to time. A lot of the things we do involve promoting events, so we all have added one another on SnapChat.
So last night I ... | 9 | 4.444444 | |
1426023897 | 1426049609 | t3_2yluno | t5_2to41 | 14 | joeymorales: TIFU today I had my Well Woman Dr's appointment, (including pap smear (yay))
I used my electric razor very quickly, because I was running out of time (kids). While visiting the bathroom at the doctors office I realized; shaving your nethers in a hurry, results in a beaver that looks more like a hairy Picas... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1426029450 | 1426035369 | t3_2ym7a1 | t5_2to41 | 16 | DuhSexyAsian: TIFU by leaving sand in my gooch
This fuckup happened around last August, but after 2 hours spent in the waves at Huntington beach in So Cal, my lazy ass decided to not shower after getting home before I slipped on another pair of clothes. Little did I know, patches of sand were still stuck between my thi... | 5 | 3.2 | |
1426033718 | 1426039370 | t3_2ymge1 | t5_2to41 | 6 | Linkerz99: TIFU by answering a number I don't know.
So just recently, I was in the middle of class and a random number decides to text me. I thought it would be a great idea to do things what I've seen on the Internet. I proceed to text them and have my friends help me out with it. Things progressively out of hand and ... | 3 | 2 | |
1426035807 | 1426181231 | t3_2ymkp8 | t5_2to41 | 440 | Pee_Away: TIFU by possibly ruining my marriage by peeing into my wife
Damen_aka_Ron_Ron: No idea why people going off on the wife for.
Her reaction is understandable considering OP just pissed all over her in an attempt to fake a orgasm.
I'm sure once she calms down, she will take back her words and be more level-he... | 15 | 29.333333 | |
1426037667 | 1426039090 | t3_2ymom4 | t5_2to41 | 5 | delta_skelta: TIFU by having an imaginary conversation
Today I was going to head out to get a haircut, but decided to finish doing the dishes in the kitchen. I have a very small kitchen and I leaned over to get something when I smacked my head on the corner of the cabinet that was open. I mean right on the corner, and ... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1426038241 | 1426041271 | t3_2ymps9 | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by dropping my wallet into a toilet filled with crap.
srivas95: I think you can apply for a copy if you remember your SS number
barelyonhere: Too late
srivas95: http://www.ssa.gov/ssnumber/ You can get a replacement, no issues. Plus, read what's given there, OP >Never carry your card with you. Keep ... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1426038247 | 1426075273 | t3_2ympsq | t5_2to41 | 5,715 | InfiniteSquareWhale: TIFU by "out thinking" my kittens.
Recently my wife and I got two kittens, Harvi and Moxxie. They have been rambunctious little twerps, and they love to run around climbing on things. Their new favorite thing is climbing up our pant legs and fighting on our laps.
Tonight was the breaking point. I ... | 11 | 519.545455 | |
1426038509 | 1426101209 | t3_2ymqdu | t5_2to41 | 24 | [deleted]: TIFU by googling my teacher's name
Anyway, the other day in my English class, we were working in groups to get a skit ready to simulate a situation with a broken life boat from the titanic. But it ended up turning into a conversation about how my teacher is on dating sites and has stuff on her profiles on ho... | 6 | 4 | |
1426038430 | 1426039416 | t3_2ymq7i | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by whispering a cannibal's name in my crush's ear
Having recently watched the Actual Cannibal Shia LaBeouf music video again ([animated version](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSO0lCO3TIg) or [extended but not animated version](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0u4M6vppCI) for those who haven't seen it)... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1426038820 | 1426064646 | t3_2ymr0l | t5_2to41 | 12 | [deleted]: TIFU by leaving my IPad on and having my mom see an article about anal sex.
IamCptPrice: Your mom already knows plenty about anal sex. Trust me.
Akhushal47: Op is the result of that knowledge ;)
KurisuTenshi: I think you got something mixed up there buddy...
| 4 | 3 | |
1426038596 | 1426043605 | t3_2ymqkb | t5_2to41 | 70 | cjl5108: TIFU By Not Cleaning Thoroughly
So me and a few buddies went out to stay at this beautiful house in Breckenridge. I mean this house incredible; huge kitchen, right on the gondola line, enough beds for everyone, free, and best of all, a hot tub.
Now, we all know the 'sweet green' is now legal in Colorado, so ... | 4 | 17.5 | |
1426039231 | 1426050536 | t3_2ymrv5 | t5_2to41 | 7 | 36throwaway3636: TIFU by torrenting porn.
So, I wake up at 6am and my dad tells me I've infringed a copyright via torrent and now my family's in dept for a minimum of 20K (5K per video, 4 videos). I have no idea how to pay this off, considering I make 190 a month from tutoring kids. I've fucked up so bad. My family can... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1426039827 | 1426057019 | t3_2ymt26 | t5_2to41 | 45 | Raz5: TIFU by making a sign fall on a girls head
Ok so this happened about a month ago but I'm just getting around to posting it. So I work part time at a restaurant washing dishes and doing whatever. So I came into work that day and, naturally, was looking for things to pass the time.
So they had just gotten one of t... | 4 | 11.25 | |
1426040367 | 1426047109 | t3_2ymu6q | t5_2to41 | 14 | BorNProNStar: tifu by eating fiber one bars
i know this is supposed to be a subreddit with funny stories, but im really here because i dont want people to be in the same pain im in right now
i had 4 fiber one bars yesterday. now im experiencing lots of gas.
the only problem is, well its not coming out. theres literal... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1426041047 | 1426051735 | t3_2ymvnu | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by driving over my cellphone
So today I went to pickup some weed from my guy and I had my phone playing music connected to my car. I picked this guy up from a bar and moved my phone so he could get into the car. We went back to his house, finished our business, and then got back in my car so I could giv... | 3 | 1 | |
1426042847 | 1426079440 | t3_2ymz26 | t5_2to41 | 14 | isilee: Tifu by telling my husband that I am pregnant.
Never_Guess94: Congrats... to you.
He deserves a Gibbs slap to the back of the head. Good and hard.
medievaleagle: He's standing right behind me, isn't he?
| 3 | 4.666667 | |
1426041305 | 1426120449 | t3_2ymw5m | t5_2to41 | 426 | _CreepItReal_: TIFU by flipping off a stranger.
I was in heavy traffic. "Heavy" is a variable term as I live in a very small town, but it was 12:05ish and there were more cars on the road than usual. So I'm driving down one of the main avenues that has two lanes and doing as I should, but this one guy in a jeep decides... | 10 | 42.6 | |
1426042909 | 1426065530 | t3_2ymz70 | t5_2to41 | 26 | -redditlurker-: TIFU by trying to help a friend out
So this actually happened a couple of months back.
Warning this is a long read but kind of entertaining if it didn't happen to you..
I have this friend “A” who is a bit weird and for a variety of reasons is perpetually unemployed and broke. About two to thre... | 6 | 4.333333 | |
1426041103 | 1426050627 | t3_2ymvs1 | t5_2to41 | 3 | VoltageEclipse: TIFU by leaving my piece around the house.
On mobile so excuse any typos.
So this happened today, in fact like 15 or so minutes ago at max. I'm just chilling in my room, vaping and my mom calls me and asks me to change the cat's liter box, so I go down and do that then I return to my room. I'm sitting ... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1426044155 | 1426049372 | t3_2yn1h6 | t5_2to41 | 22 | waitsfieldjon: TIFU by posting excerpts from the Constitution to r/Republican
hurtsdonut_: The most important part.
"Any citizen of the United States, wherever he may be, who, without authority of the United States, directly or indirectly commences or carries on any correspondence or intercourse with any foreign gove... | 3 | 7.333333 | |
1426036416 | 1426049944 | t3_2ymlzv | t5_2to41 | 6 | shmeedmobile: TIFU by yelling at my mom and ruining a surprise party
So this fuck-up happened literally 30 minutes ago.
For the past couple weeks, my mom has been meticulously planning a surprise birthday party for my sister, whose birthday is in late March. My sister loves surprises and my mom is trying to be extrem... | 3 | 2 | |
1426045590 | 1426046752 | t3_2yn45z | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU implying that child abuse turns me on
Some background info: I had been trying to get with a girl who was really into smashing pumpkins. I knew almost nothing about their music. We were sitting in her room listening to smashing pumpkins when:
Her: you know, some of smashing pumpkins really turns me on. ... | 3 | 2 | |
1426041272 | 1426054125 | t3_2ymw3c | t5_2to41 | 17 | Pezzinatorr: TIFU by splitting my bra into two pieces.
Well reddit. I gotta say, I think I fucked up enough to finally make a post.
It all started this weekend. When I had the bright idea to wear a "close-to-breaking" bra. Now when I say this, I don't mean a tiny hole. I mean the middle part where the two cups connect... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1426047283 | 1426065966 | t3_2yn76b | t5_2to41 | 30 | reret10: TIFU by Introducing myself to a special kid
It all started during lunch today when I saw a kid sitting alone. Now i'm not a particularly nice person but I felt sorry for the little dude and I had a while before I had to get to 5th period. So I walked over to him and ask him what his name was. He replied that h... | 5 | 6 | |
1426041142 | 1440538432 | t3_2ymvur | t5_2to41 | 12 | KittyLord0824: TIFU by trying to get rid of bed bugs.
My boyfriend's old room mates were unique souls and refused to ask the landlord to fumigate the place even after almost a year of having bed bugs, and boyfriend dearest couldn't do it because his name wasn't on the lease. We moved into a new house and, thankfully, o... | 5 | 2.4 | |
1426048708 | 1426049369 | t3_2yn9i9 | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by scratching a luxury car with a sports car.
I am currently visiting my Aunt for a couple of days while I am traveling. She is very busy at the moment, so I'm hanging around her place playing with her dogs and enjoying the sun.
As I'm leaving tonight, she suggested I drive her brand new Nissan z35. I... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1426047822 | 1426178157 | t3_2yn81v | t5_2to41 | 9 | Qazwsx838: TIFU by using the wrong shampoo...
TIFU when I decided to use a new shampoo. It worked wonders on my hair, but when I shower I use the shampoo in my hair to wash my parts beneath the equator. About 10 seconds later I start feeling this almost burning sensation. I can't figure out what's going on! That's when... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1426050857 | 1426194058 | t3_2yncvo | t5_2to41 | 4 | Gigarceus: TIFU: Browser History
Last night, I wanted to bust one out and it was late at night. I grabbed the closest thing near me which was an old iPod Touch and went onto a porn website. After finishing, I started searching around the iPod and see the stuff it has (the iPod hasn't been touched in almost a year) and ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1426050191 | 1426052741 | t3_2ynbvp | t5_2to41 | 4 | Archaea: TIFU because I'm an idiot and can't be trusted to book shit all.
So today I fucked up by accidentally changing my sleeper coach back 6 days instead of forward one, and only realising while waiting for the coach that never was.
I was supposed to be sleeping peacefully on a coach from Perth, Scotland, arriving... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1426050080 | 1426098228 | t3_2ynbpe | t5_2to41 | 3 | jimyyyy: TIFU by drinking the wrong drink on a weekday
This actually happened today/yesterday and is still "happening" as I sit here and try to kill some time until I can finally go to school.
For some reason I suddenly decided to come over to a friend and drink alcoholic beverage with him and a few other guys on a we... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1426051101 | 1426080953 | t3_2ynd7r | t5_2to41 | 12 | 9279: TIFU I called a mean but apparently well-liked woman a name and now everyone wants to kill me
I live in an apartment complex and everyone is passive aggressive and leaves notes everywhere. On cars, doors, etc.
I was being given a really hard time for a while about my parking. I'd get in super late after work and... | 4 | 3 | |
1426051712 | 1426052884 | t3_2yne39 | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by drinking orange juice after brushing my teeth
everydayispain: Go brush your teeth again.
Teddisaurus: Made sure to do so. Melted the OJ cap onto the bottle to prevent further problems.
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1426053693 | 1426111688 | t3_2ynguf | t5_2to41 | 52 | SoCoSlurpee: TIFU by typing in TIFU.....
Happened literally 30 seconds ago...
So there I was sitting on the train, bored. I decided to load up some reddit and feel like brightening up my day with the fuck ups of others. Hit up my iPhone, safari, tap the search box and I type really fast. I fat finger is sooo hard and ... | 7 | 7.428571 | |
1426053429 | 1426107018 | t3_2ynggt | t5_2to41 | 5 | Personalityprototype: TIFU by listening to Jamming by Bob Marley too intensely
There's a percussive bit in triplets that plays out of the left side speakers, and now it's all I can listen to. ruins the song, don't know why it's in there.
Stowaway_Sandwich: Is it the kind of light, tinkly sounding percussion? I can hea... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1426054528 | 1426072316 | t3_2ynhwk | t5_2to41 | 55 | iknow2much: TIFU by teaching my dad about computers
UGH reddit haaalp! My mind is scarred right now. Throwaway because reasons... Back story, I am a female in college right now (the female part is relevant) and I needed a new laptop last year so my dad helped me buy a new MacBook. Fast forward to last summer, at the e... | 6 | 9.166667 | |
1426054162 | 1426060818 | t3_2ynhfs | t5_2to41 | 8 | joemofo214: TIFU by wanting a midnight snack
So, this happened to me just now. I'm up, and I have the munchies. My mom is chilling at her corner next to the kitchen, a fan is blowing in her direction. I get to the kitchen, and I put a pot of water on the burner and put turned the stove on high. We have a habit of dropp... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1426055229 | 1426058744 | t3_2ynirr | t5_2to41 | -2 | Classics-Gottaloveit: TIFU by sleeping with a "MILF" from my childhood who is not yet completely divorced.
Personalityprototype: Truly a king among men.
Classics-Gottaloveit: I like to think so, we will see how Tina feels after the divorce. If I can play this right I may have a queen.
Personalityprototype: think abou... | 8 | -0.25 | |
1426054463 | 1426074806 | t3_2ynhu6 | t5_2to41 | 27 | ZucchiniSky: TIFU by visiting my ex for spring break
This just happened last week.
I dated this girl for a year. We met online in the fall of 2013 playing an online game called League of Legends and, over the course of a month or so, realized we had feelings for each other, and began a long-distance, online relationsh... | 7 | 3.857143 | |
1426056821 | 1426057770 | t3_2ynkot | t5_2to41 | 8 | jaxik: TIFU by peeing too bard
Walkinix: Hey man that's not yours
https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/28epq5/tifu_by_peeing_too_hard/?sort=confidence
alfamaleisalfa: I remember reading this from some other guy also
-reddit_user-: Yeah it was funny then, but still is pretty funny.
| 4 | 2 | |
1426053759 | 1426058549 | t3_2yngxf | t5_2to41 | 84 | mwoolley88: TIFU by evacuating a wing of the Prague airport
As most TIFUs go this happened a while ago, a bit of back story I work for a software company that is based in Israel and recently I had the opportunity to fly there, as work paid for the flights i took advantage and flew from Israel to Europe for some annual ... | 3 | 28 | |
1426057980 | 1426062306 | t3_2ynlyu | t5_2to41 | 4 | sketchlives: TIFU By trying to pick up a beautiful Cambodian "girl"
ThisIsNotMyTrueForm: Lesson learned: always inspect the merchandise before purchase. Rookie mistake.
sketchlives: i wasnt trying to buy "her" "she" just seemed cool.
ThisIsNotMyTrueForm: In that case don't look gift horse in the mouth.
Entinu: I think... | 5 | 0.8 | |
1426058351 | 1426085294 | t3_2ynmd7 | t5_2to41 | 16 | fattestofalldogs: TIFU by coughing when I was peeing. [NSFW]
A few hours ago, I was peeing when I had the urge to cough. Not thinking too much of it, I coughed surprisingly hard. Immediately, I felt a sharp pain in my general ball sack/dick area, and my pee turned red from blood. Now I'm worried I fucked something u... | 5 | 3.2 | |
1426058683 | 1426072314 | t3_2ynmqh | t5_2to41 | 14 | staticthreat: TIFU by dropping a bottle of Vodka straight down a flight of stairs.
This happened tonight and I am still kicking myself for doing it.
My gf asked me to go grab a bottle of Vodka so we could have a few drinks after work. I had the bottle sitting on her desk upstairs and when she came home I was pretendi... | 7 | 2 | |
1426059022 | 1426167587 | t3_2ynn2b | t5_2to41 | 65 | MrSirBroseidon: TIFU by Putting Nair on my Balls
This is on mobile so apologies if there are some errors. Pretty much what the title says. I have a weekend with the lady friend and i figured i should get my package ready. Normally i use a razor to manscape but i always get nervous I'm going to cut myself. So, i go to g... | 6 | 10.833333 | |
1426058631 | 1426061291 | t3_2ynmoq | t5_2to41 | 9 | Me-Mow_: TIFU By almost posting in /r/unashamed
I was about to profess my unashamed, bountiful love for the song Party In The USA by Miley Cyrus (seriously, I love that song).
I quickly realized that /r/unashamed is a *different* kind of "**unashamed**" than I was thinking of. :(
Literally_Doge: This isn't a fuck u... | 3 | 3 | |
1426063476 | 1426100590 | t3_2ynrhi | t5_2to41 | 10 | 900__dollarydoos: TIFU by being a typical pervert male and putting my foot in my mouth
This happened about 3 hours ago so its still very fresh. Back ground story: I'm mid 20's and have been with my girlfriend for 5 years. My friends and i use group conversations for different upcoming events and just keeping in touch e... | 4 | 2.5 | |
1426067009 | 1426071001 | t3_2ynuwo | t5_2to41 | 10 | Kittybegood: TIFU by punching my girlfriend in the face.
Entinu: Huh. I think he should sleep on the couch just to test something. Hope your mouth feels better.
Kittybegood: Lol! To test what? It's funny! First time anything like this ever happened. I mean I get the occasional flailing arm to the face but never hard, ... | 8 | 1.25 | |
1426067071 | 1426071302 | t3_2ynuyw | t5_2to41 | 50 | sir_carried_away: TIFU by falling in love with the cute cashier from Target
...and no longer have $100 bucks for new shoes, opened a redcard credit account, and indebted myself an additional $150 on said card. Yes I kept going back for crap I didnt need only to find out she has a bf
On the plus side my skin feels fa... | 5 | 10 | |
1426067514 | 1426109834 | t3_2ynvex | t5_2to41 | 1,998 | commander9200: TIFU by texting a friend
Actually it's not just today, it's been for the last 2 years.
2 years ago, I used to work with a guy named Den. We were friends at work but never really socialised outside of that environment.
I eventually quit from that job, and a couple of months later he sent me a Merry Ch... | 12 | 166.5 | |
1426032755 | 1427167420 | t3_2ymed3 | t5_2to41 | 8 | Ultica: TIFU by thinking my parents were gone on a bike ride and getting caught sneaking out to go to friends
So Today was a normal day and my fairly strict parents said that they were going to go on a bike ride and asked if I wanted to come. Of course I said no as I was in my pajamas lying in bed and also said that I ... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1426069737 | 1426087338 | t3_2ynxns | t5_2to41 | 312 | pgh9fan: TIFU by loving my son
This eff up occurred about 10 years or so ago. My son was little and teething. I was at home and held out my arms to hug him while wearing a pair of sweatpants shorts. He runs across the living room and greets me. The little spawn of the devil (no doubt from my wife's side) runs up and bi... | 8 | 39 | |
1426071212 | 1426072572 | t3_2ynz67 | t5_2to41 | 6 | abrasivebutton: TIFU by waking up before my alarm
Normally I'm in bed by 9 pm and wake up around 5:30 am. Last night, I woke up "before" my alarm went off, got up, took a caffeine pill, and then looked at the clock. "11:00 PM"
helpfulchick: Why do you take a caffeine pill upon waking?
FunkyFlies: Abrasivebutton is a... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1425935769 | 1426466396 | t3_2yhgrz | t5_2to41 | 5 | kryptickhaos: TIFU (currently) following Arsenal Manure FA cup Quarter final at work
So currently following the game, welbeck scores I let a huge cheer out forgetting im at work.....
Symbiotic_Disharmony: It should be all good, unless you work with and your boss are United supporters.
kryptickhaos: my boss is manchest... | 5 | 1 | |
1426024541 | 1658887463 | t3_2ylw6d | t5_2to41 | 8 | palerms: TIFU by taking too much beta alanine (pre work out)
So. Bought some beta alanine which is a concentrated amino acid. Can be used on its own as a pre workout. Makes skin a little itchy but good to train with
I've never used it on it'd own. Ask my genius brother in law who uses it how much to take. Tells me 1 t... | 4 | 2 | |
1426027336 | 1426082878 | t3_2ym2jx | t5_2to41 | 7 | Paligor: TIFU by totally forgetting what I was carrying
As most of the cases here, this happened some time ago.
So, a friend of mine gave me some 12 gauge shells and I put them into my bag. Fast forward, I totally forgot about those and I got into a certain predicament and had to go to court and had nowhere to leave t... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1426074314 | 1426076708 | t3_2yo2ow | t5_2to41 | 20 | temporad: TIFU by getting a taste of my own medicine, literally (slightly NSFW)
Fl000: wtf did i just read LOL
temporad: Just a glimpse of my fucked up life. Believe it or not it only went downhill from there
Fl000: what even possessed you to put the poop in your pocket? why not dig a hole or throw it over a neighbour... | 5 | 4 | |
1426066187 | 1426086645 | t3_2ynu3s | t5_2to41 | 4 | TongaGirl: TIFU by forgetting that I owned the dirty pot on the stove
For weeks I've been frustrated by how many pots and pans are living on our stovetop. For reference, my two roommates and I share a 4 burner stove. In particular, I noticed one small silver pot that just never was moved, and rarely seemed to be used e... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1426070810 | 1426080507 | t3_2ynyra | t5_2to41 | 2 | shadwan11: TIFU by getting a sore throat
I was spending my evening procrastinating as usual (this happened yesterday evening leading up to this morning). I'm a 17 just to let you know, and happen to forgot to put my slippers on. What ended up happening is I got cold feet which lead me to develop a sore throat all of a ... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1426075759 | 1426113936 | t3_2yo4io | t5_2to41 | 10 | icoulddrawthat: TIFU by answering the door
Let's start with a bit of background.
Firstly: I have 6 diagnosed medical conditions, the worst two being fibromyalgia and Chronic fatigue and they are thinking I have a seventh: lupus . So I'm at a stage where I spend a fair amount of my days bedridden.
Second: I am an artis... | 5 | 2 | |
1426075650 | 1426083932 | t3_2yo4dx | t5_2to41 | 3 | hunglowstayhigh: TIFU by subjecting myself to McDonald's shitty serve
ShinobiGinger: Not sure what area of the world you are in, but pretty much all McDonald's sell breakfast burritos, and hot cakes all day long
Source: McDonald's employee
VoteForAmWorks: > McDonald's sell breakfast burritos
Please, tell me they ... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1426077516 | 1426144041 | t3_2yo6vt | t5_2to41 | 218 | not-a-prince: TIFU by overestimating my bravery
So, background. I am a teacher in junior secondry school ( children between 11-15 mostly) and today during break the boys were playing with a dead lizard and scaring the girls, I heard the commotion from the common room where I was trying to take a 15 minute nap, the girl... | 6 | 36.333333 | |
1426077672 | 1426082599 | t3_2yo73h | t5_2to41 | 9 | gib_me_monny: TIFU by discovering THAT part of reddit(probably nsfw)
this just happened
so i was reading TIFU and i was reading "tifu by not bringing my gfs tampon" by u/hooked_shot
after having a good laugh, i decide to read the comments, and this guy post some subreddit that i never knew, he post 5 subreddit that i... | 7 | 1.285714 | |
1426075607 | 1426166275 | t3_2yo4bt | t5_2to41 | 12 | speedupankita: TIFU by missing an important office meeting
TIFU moment can occur at anytime and anywhere with anyone. This time it happened with me. As usual I go to bed every day at 4 am after completing my work. I can understand what you people are thinking about me. Am I suffering from insomnia? No, it is not. Actua... | 7 | 1.714286 | |
1426079297 | 1426095522 | t3_2yo9n7 | t5_2to41 | 135 | [deleted]: TIFU by being friends with my ex.
CavedogRIP: Had a similar thing happen to me with a different ending. I knew this girl for around 7-8 years but wasn't ever really close friends with her. Anyway we ended up dating after an interesting new years party, we were together for maybe 3 months. It was long dis... | 8 | 16.875 | |
1426082127 | 1426224541 | t3_2yoeg5 | t5_2to41 | 6,549 | CarlosWeiner: TIFU by picking up a drugged girl in a slutty nurse outfit off the bathroom floor and taking her home safe and sound.
It was Halloween at Western University in London, Ontario, and my friends and I were hitting up an amazing burger join just outside of the bar we'd been drinking at.
I go for a piss afte... | 20 | 327.45 | |
1426082237 | 1426087212 | t3_2yoenk | t5_2to41 | 6 | andyspark: TIFU by looking for my wife's coffee cup
disambiguated: >So the surprise part is ruined and I guess I should have told her I wanted an Apple watch.
No, you don't - the battery life is pathetic.
I've been using a Pebble for the last two years, first with rooted Android, now with the iPhone 6 Plus. It ... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1426081985 | 1426109777 | t3_2yoe5k | t5_2to41 | 17 | ThrowawayTIFU4: TIFU My response to a question in a job interview.
The question was "Tell us about yourself."
So I go on and say, "Uhmm... well I casually go out with friends, catch a movie, chill or do whatever and just relax." Until I realised what I have done. There was no turning back. I should of said something l... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1426083130 | 1426090373 | t3_2yoga7 | t5_2to41 | 10 | suftum: TIFU by not being able to get over a girl
A bit of a backstory, I’m 23, she’s just turned 20. We knew each other from school a bit, I was always interested from an early stage, but the age gap back then was probably more important then as it is now. Skip on a couple of years and she would come into my old work... | 6 | 1.666667 | |
1426082922 | 1426137989 | t3_2yofvh | t5_2to41 | 441 | littlmanlvdfire: TIFU by staring at Lady Gaga's genitals
Not today, but you might remember back in 2009-10 there was a bit of a controversy about Lady Gaga's lady parts, or lack there of. Gossip was going around that Lady G. might have a disco stick of her own. Actually, as a freshman in college, the word going around ... | 9 | 49 | |
1426081121 | 1426087561 | t3_2yocmy | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by having my hangover fart in a cafe
danmayzing: Never trust a fart.
Kaankaants: ESPECIALLY after a night on the piss!
| 3 | 3 | |
1426085160 | 1426087029 | t3_2yok2j | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by spending £1000 on nothing.
I've really messed up. Over 4 months I've spent £1000 on nothing. I have nothing to show for it. Somehow I've got to get it back. Let's hope I can do that.
downvotemeufags: What a cryptic/vague TIFU, I don't even know wtf you're talking about.
Chrisbyy: Well, like it says... | 5 | 1 | |
1426085132 | 1426100422 | t3_2yok0f | t5_2to41 | 135 | Needstohavemyname: TIFU by brushing my teeth right before blowing my fiance'. (NSFW)
downvotemeufags: Confused...
Why would you brush your teeth BEFORE putting a dick in your mouth? Sounds like you got the order mixed up there.
SomeDumBetch: Improves the taste; means you're not basking in breath sautéed in whatever ... | 6 | 22.5 | |
1426084612 | 1427467274 | t3_2yoj0r | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by hanging out with my friends
We were all driving around a neighborhood out of boredom. It was getting dark. but we decided to stop and chill at an unfinished, abandoned house. It only had the walls and some pipes, mind you. Well we were hanging out, not doing ANYTHING against the law besides appar... | 8 | 0.875 | |
1426086054 | 1426176663 | t3_2yolw8 | t5_2to41 | 8 | Duthos: TIFU by being poor
Apparently my bank balance was ten bucks short for my insurance payment. And before I was aware there was an issue the bank charged me 90$ in fees dropping my account into the red, and ICBC has tacked on 40$ to my bill on thier end. 130 bucks owed, negagive balance, and my insurance is unpaid... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1426086435 | 1426097617 | t3_2yomny | t5_2to41 | 85 | [deleted]: TIFU by creeping on a random Chinese boy
So this happened after I finished my undergrad in the states a couple years ago. (not today, I apologize).
I went to China to teach English in a group of about 30 other Americans for about a month. The students were anywhere between 8-13. The school would take every... | 4 | 21.25 | |
1426086374 | 1426174839 | t3_2yomjy | t5_2to41 | 2,236 | koreaneon: TIFU by commenting on my gf's mom's tattoo
So this was a while ago, around two years ago. I had recently got together with my girlfriend of now, everything was new and exciting and I hadn't been around her house to meet her mom yet. When she invited me around her house to have dinner I was shitting myself be... | 14 | 159.714286 | |
1426086024 | 1426141045 | t3_2yoltv | t5_2to41 | 1,149 | The_Hippopotamoose: TIFU By getting outsmarted by an autistic 9 year old.
So I babysit this autistic kid from time to time. Lets call him Rick. It's actually not all that hard I just have to make sure I have my eye on him all the time so he doesn't get into medicine cabinets and junk. He just replays the same 10 second... | 9 | 127.666667 | |
1426087397 | 1426114882 | t3_2yoolc | t5_2to41 | 13 | AlmostCircus: TIFU Underwear
Strict religious parents found women's underwear in my (M) bed. They think I'm having sex with my friend (F) that comes around often. Actually, I just forgot to hide the pants I like to wear...
Tell the truth or keep up the illusion?
(created account for this)
Kataphractoi: Keep up the il... | 7 | 1.857143 | |
1426087573 | 1426157897 | t3_2yooxb | t5_2to41 | 4,729 | Azor-Azhai: TIFU with the worst save ever
This happened just like 10 minutes ago, I'm still shaking and terrified to go downstairs.
Okay, so in the U.K it's Mother's Day on Sunday.
Earlier I went to get my mum [a few chocolates etc.](http://i.imgur.com/9TQJgrA.jpg) to go with her presents, and as she was at work, I ... | 10 | 472.9 | |
1426088407 | 1426100387 | t3_2yoqny | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by being a dick on shark week.
I was getting on to my girl for wiping blood from her vagina and "putting it in the fucking trash can, please flush that shit". She then informed me (and proved) that it was nail polish.
Ask me if she's happy with me.
Edit: this was my first TIFU post. Tough crowd...
apa... | 3 | 2 | |
1426087534 | 1426090451 | t3_2yoouk | t5_2to41 | 13 | tecknomarco: Tifu by engaging in playtime with the wife without first washing my hands.
After cutting up Habanero peppers for the following days lunch. Oops.
Kataphractoi: So how long before she decides to talk to you again?
tecknomarco: It took many, many apologies and the promise to use gloves when cutting up spicy t... | 3 | 4.333333 | |
1426088777 | 1426092067 | t3_2yorg2 | t5_2to41 | 9 | throwingfarfarrraway: TIFU by bullying and stalking a college crush
So, this didn't happen today (sorry), but I was hoping people might learn from my cringe-worthy college mistake from a few years ago.
To start with, I'm a girl who had a crush on a guy that lived a floor or two above me in a large college freshman dor... | 4 | 2.25 | |
1426088410 | 1426147587 | t3_2yoqo7 | t5_2to41 | 3 | Fghtffyrdmns27: TIFU by brushing my teeth
This just happened. I was brushing my teeth getting ready to go to school. When I brush my teeth I like to walk around the house(don't know if that's normal). Well I started playing with my dog. I started chasing her around the house as what we usually do when we play, when I s... | 3 | 1 | |
1426089912 | 1426154589 | t3_2yotwo | t5_2to41 | 597 | QueenVisaCunt: TIFU by telling a couple of drunk customers to lay off our mentally ill, regular customer [NSFW-ish]
I hope this doesn't break rule 3 of bodily discharge but here it goes.
As I'm typing this right now I'm sitting on my bed, clean out of the shower, writing every detail of what just happened at work befo... | 8 | 74.625 | |
1426085195 | 1426092129 | t3_2yok5o | t5_2to41 | 31 | Disorientedpossum: TIFU by not making a personal phone call and sending an email instead
kyewtee: YOU did not fuck up. I am so sorry for your loss but this was not your fault.
Disorientedpossum: I get told that often by people who know the whole thing, but I can't help but feel had I JUST picked up the damn phone.. MA... | 3 | 10.333333 | |
1426091483 | 1426092241 | t3_2yoxc9 | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU just by being myself
Am tired of being controversial and being socially alone. But the high I get from it is unlike anything else I can find no replacement for it. Besting someone is my drug and I hate it.
downvotemeufags: Cool story?
But, why the fuck is this in TIFU? This isn't a fuckup, it's a sho... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1426092455 | 1426100582 | t3_2yoziv | t5_2to41 | 90 | CRFyou: TIFU By MMA sweep kicking a young blonde college girl...
First let's establish my physique so a context for damage can be established. I'm 6'5" tall and 237 pounds. My legs/thighs have always been my strongest feature. Throughout my life people have talked about my speed skater thighs and I'd joke that I used t... | 6 | 15 | |
1426092925 | 1426098226 | t3_2yp0jq | t5_2to41 | 3 | dumdumbd: Tifu? by doing exactly what my dad told me not to do
This is my first post and a throaway account so...
This just happened several hours ago and i am still in my dad's car. I just paid over 1k as capital for a business where i sell a product which is exactly what my dad tell me i should not do!!!
Praying t... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1426091616 | 1426169908 | t3_2yoxn5 | t5_2to41 | 91 | XL_Miro: TIFU by using Hover Zoom on NSFW subreddits at work.
(Sorry in advance for my english.)
Normal day, like many others.
During a boring time of the day, I was browsing on Reddit (You know, like we all do). I subscribed a couple of NSFW subreddits, and the top ones of every hour are on the front page, like in e... | 6 | 15.166667 | |
1426093883 | 1426095043 | t3_2yp2o9 | t5_2to41 | 7 | nedrudt: TIFU by pocket dialing the police
So as I was making my way to school this morning I received a call from an unknown number. I hesitantly answered my phone as I don't like taking calls from people who withhold their number. A woman started to talk to me, telling me that I had phoned the police and asked if eve... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1426094069 | 1426097240 | t3_2yp34l | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by being impatient and thinking my phone was broken
raise your hand if you are an impatient idiot like me and assumed it was your iPhone 5s acting up so you decided the only thing to do was to reset your iPhone because hey, think of it like spring cleaning amirite? Only to realize that it's [master Appl... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1426094658 | 1426127942 | t3_2yp4id | t5_2to41 | 823 | Handsome_Fry: TIFU by ripping ass in a patient's room
pocketful_of_grudges: Wow I've never heard 'ripping ass' before so I came in expecting an FU that involved an actually ripped ass. I even pictured the horrific image in my head for a second. Glad this was a good ol' farty FU.
Handsome_Fry: Having seen a literal rip... | 8 | 102.875 | |
1426095019 | 1426096514 | t3_2yp5ab | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by masturbating before going to Burger King
myrptaway: You fap to big black women?
KungFuMonkeyDickSlap: You don't?
| 3 | 1 | |
1426091051 | 1426097687 | t3_2yowdg | t5_2to41 | 15 | doodlesnickers: TIFU by having zero fashion sense.
I'm tall, so finding a shirt like a tunic is almost hard to find when I'm being frugal. Went to a yard sale this past weekend that had tables upon tables of mixed, brand name, clothing for $2. I found this awesome J Crew shirt that would work great with navy leggings. ... | 5 | 3 | |
1426095399 | 1426101194 | t3_2yp65o | t5_2to41 | -2 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to impress a girl
MalachiDraven: That's the wrong use of the word "hustler". You're still failing at trying to look cool...
Westmang: Do you take everything this seriously?
| 3 | -0.666667 | |
1426096844 | 1426145358 | t3_2yp9i4 | t5_2to41 | 0 | ogunquitme: TIFU by sending email to ex bf
Antizer: I wonder what his reply would be.
ogunquitme: I doubt will ever hear from him again.
Antizer: I assume it's a good news. Cheers mate.
Edit: 10 years though. It's impossible for you to stop loving him so suddenly..
ogunquitme: I know. That's why it felt so good wr... | 6 | 0 |
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