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7
[deleted]: TIFU by talking to my ex while she was drunk Warning, this one's more sad than funny. It's currently the school holidays where I live and my ex girlfriend is back in town. Last night she texted me while she was out at town and was apparently really drunk. She has an iPhone and still managed to fail at sendi...
4
1.75
1367071732
1367170523
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181
[deleted]: TIFU by accidentally calling a girl "a fucking fat bitch" whilst having sex with her I wanted to post my favourite story of all time for ages. I have told so many people about it so I thought I would share it here. The following is typed by my friend, to whom these events occured: So me and my mate have cr...
6
30.166667
1367069956
1367080098
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26
[deleted]: TIFU by introducing my friend Me and this guy have been friends for a long time, were practically family. So when I was introducing him to my friends from school I thought it was nothing, well I was wrong. He talks to them now, but when he does it's either him insulting the sexuality of my friend, calling m...
3
8.666667
1367081819
1367108261
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5,453
[deleted]: TIFU by having anal sex for the first(and probably last) time. So this girl I had seen once the previous weekend asked if she could come over. I said ok, we ended up drinking some, then went out to dance. We got very drunk, and slept together when we came home. We did all sorts of crazy stuff and then we c...
11
495.727273
1367081253
1367546208
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72
iBleeedMetal: TIFU by trying to get on my teacher's good side Background: My English teacher hates me. I know everyone will say "oh she doesn't hate you, she just wants you to succeed" etc., but this teacher HATES me. A couple examples: she kicked me out of the class because I finished the assignment too fast; I'm 6'4...
5
14.4
1367107651
1367173718
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50
mind_maze: TIFU by calling a fat girl an ape. You know how peoples names are often shortened just for the hell of it? Like for example my names victor, but I go by Vic, a David would be Dave, a Jennifer would be Jen, etc? Well today I was roaming the mall being my happy go lucky self. I see someone I usually see in the...
6
8.333333
1367112544
1367192907
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52
Fillywhigs: TIFU by accidentally showing my friends my dick via webcam. We were playing Roll20, and I had okayed vid feed. It was only me and one other friend who had done this; the rest were doing audio only. The "do you want to allow sites x to access webcam y" bubble had bugged out and was covering where I would n...
4
13
1367115098
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17
Apotheosis91: TIFU by forgetting her birthday All month she's been subtly hinting, dropping little things to make sure I remember. She's had a really rough year and being able to celebrate this was a very big deal. Lo and behold I did not remember. And she's on her period. And we hung out today and I didn't bring it up...
3
5.666667
1367111098
1367319603
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123
relationshipsque: TIFU by trying to use a tampon. Wasn't today, but it is a fuck up story nonetheless. So I was 18 and home alone for the first time in the long time - at least, the first time I knew no one was going to come home for a few days. I had always used pads for me period, since my first time trying to get ...
10
12.3
1367115959
1367158294
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76
stones_at_the_stars: TIFU by flooding one of the most expensive pieces of machinery in my lab This isn't the most interesting story, nothing exploded into a crowd of children and nobody shat their pants (that I'm aware of) but I fucked up pretty badly nonetheless. Some back story, I work in a biology lab at my universi...
4
19
1367110237
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4
masterstick8: TIFU by choosing my words poorly. I was in a anorexia thread in r/rage and this nice girl posted about how she was anorexic but "outgrew it" and that although she had moved on, even the slightest thing could throw her back into it. You know what I replied? "I'm glad you outgrew it". They must have tho...
3
1.333333
1367126239
1367130997
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26
tiffjv: TIFU By Lighting a Bonfire Before Checking the Barrel This is a little long, sorry. :/ This evening, my uncle wanted my parents and I to help him burn his garden at his house. The garden is basically a big oval of dead leaves with a burn barrel in the center. We lit a fire in the barrel and thew some sticks and...
11
2.363636
1367121074
1367166307
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3
[deleted]: TIFU by getting black out drunk and robbed in Vegas Long story short I was in Vegas for my bosses birthday and we had a great trip until about 5 hours left before our plane leaves and insanity ensues. I was in the club and drank almost three quarters of a bottle of goose got hammered and started dancing wit...
3
1
1367126340
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10
[deleted]: TIFU by accidentally cutting off the car my Lola was in... Lola = the respective name for grandmother in Tagalog, the language of the Philippines. Onto the fuck up... Throughout the nice 90 degree day, I'm having a really great day of driving. Drove to downtown in the morning to help my girlfriend at her ...
3
3.333333
1367131454
1367160035
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36
IPlayTheGuitar: TIFU by cutting my hand on a loaf of bread. It had a really sharp edge. [deleted]: Bread will soon take over the world. IPlayTheGuitar: >Bread will soon bake over the world. TheRealMrMo: As long as we are allowed to still bake too, i'm okay with that.
4
9
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lookAtMeHard: TIFU and learned that a hair razor, even with a guard (no. 1) can take a gouge out of your ballsack! **I meant "HAIR CLIPPERS"**... my bad :/ I occasionally give my nether regions a well-deserved trim (usually coinciding on the guarantee of sex). My chosen style is no.4 around the pubic area and no.1 off...
8
91.875
1367162134
1367548546
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23
applepiss: tifu by slapping a girls ass This was friday but I haven't had time to post this. So I was walking through the halls and I saw this girl I always joke around with like that so I waslked up behind her amd spun my hand in a softball pitch type motion and smacked her... little did I know there was a teacher beh...
4
5.75
1367177486
1367183998
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9
HeckToTheYeah65: TIFU by telling my dad "Your Mom." He asked me "What's this?" and out of habit, I replied "Your mom." I just found out he's never been told a mom joke ever in his life and the last person he would expect it from was his daughter. He got really offended and would like to talk to me later. *Gulp...* R41D...
3
3
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[deleted]: TIFU by waiting 4 hours to introduce myself to a girl only yo spew incoherent nonsense **sorry for the typo in the title, typing this on my phone** I'm on a bus heading back home and at one of the cities we stop at, a beautiful girl gets on and asks to sit next to me since there aren't any other seats. Thi...
3
19.333333
1367181512
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122
[deleted]: TIFU by talking to a homeless person. Today I was on my way to visit my girlfriend and while waiting to get on the freeway, there was a homeless woman with a sign asking for money. I noticed she was in an Avengers T-shirt, so I rolled my window down and politely asked "Oh, so you like the Avengers?" She star...
10
12.2
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132
cringexxx: TIFU By embarassing myself infront of my crush :( I was walking on my way to the bus stop to go to school, and I was early so I was the only one there waiting for my bus. My crush catches the bus at the same place as me and then he comes over and stands there, so I am stood there by him waiting for the bus. ...
11
12
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696
mustangwolf1997: TIFU and gave myself a Hitler Hickey. Erm... Yeah. See, I like to watch videos on YouTube and drink tropical blue lemonade. I also have a nasty habit of forming a vacuum with my lips and removing all the air from the cap when I'm done with the drink. I fucking hate this habit. Want to know why? T...
8
87
1367194230
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Evolution100: TIFU by saying something really stupid Happened on Friday. So I'm walking down the sidewalk at my school when I notice a group of people I know (like 7 people). These kids are in at least one grade higher than I am. So I walk toward them all casual, when one girl says, "Hey!" as in saying hi to me. Me, ...
3
6.333333
1367196887
1367258884
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34
H00PSHER: TIFU by swallowing a half dollar... So, to start off I am 13 years old and this all happened last sunday. I was messing around, not thinking, and was swirling a half dollar in between my teeth. As unlucky as I was, it slipped in between my teeth, went down my throat, tried to cough it up, made it even worse, ...
7
4.857143
1367199365
1367290997
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15
[deleted]: TIFU by Dominating a girl who has been raped. Well, last night I did. The sad thing is, I was/am really into her. I like kinky sex, and she does too. In fact, that is how we met (through an internet personal about BDSM). We have been talking quite a lot, and we got along really well, but we finally got d...
3
5
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pepsi109: TIFU by driving my car into a pole Today I fucked up by running into a pole with my car while trying to leave work today. A stopped car was in the aisle I was driving down so I cut across parking spots, looked to my left, and drove right into a damn Handicap sign pole. My airbag deployed and the front of my c...
4
5.25
1367161176
1367269974
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34
[deleted]: TIFU by pissing on my desk During the biggest week of celebration and partying at my University I got drunk every night and did just fine. Until Saturday night... I was blacked out by 11. Last thing I remember is playing some flippy cup. Apparently I made it to bed by 12 and I wouldn't give my girlfriend (co...
5
6.8
1367201790
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19
[deleted]: TIFU by electrifying my retainer. So, literally like 2 minutes ago I was smoking my MFLB (a vaporized that uses a removable battery to light the heating element), and for some reason, I was putting the positive end of the battery to the metal of my retainer (Don't ask why, I seriously don't know). Now appare...
3
6.333333
1367216895
1367361657
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78
89568956: TIFU by jokingly proposing marriage to my best friend. We were having the best day of our lives, the funnest day of our lives. Me and her were hanging out and all the right things happened. I was so caught up in it and all that I thought nothing could go wrong. We spend so much time hanging out together that...
5
15.6
1367219690
1367290560
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536
[deleted]: TIFU and my great grandmother was there to witness, take pictures and laugh in my face..She's 98 I live with my grandmother and I took her out to go grocery shopping and my great grandmother who is currently visiting us didn't want to get up and put the dog out on his leash to pee. Upon arrival of my house I...
9
59.555556
1367237987
1367286593
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73
Okuu-Trollzy: TIFU by sitting in a shower. Let me begin by saying that I do not sit in the shower very often. However, when I am very tired or stressed, I'll sit with my knees clutched up to my chest and enjoy the water on my back. And usually, I get up very slowly so as to properly let blood flow to my head. Usually, ...
6
12.166667
1367240373
1367316856
null
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1,199
XO1cat: TIFU by doing a zombie impression in the most inappropriate situation imaginable I work in a students union in an office upstairs. My friend works on the reception, right in the middle of the main entrance foyer downstairs. We both are big fans of the walking dead and are both pretty much up to the same point i...
7
171.285714
1367212411
1367252397
null
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18
grant0: TIFU by using my sister's library account for ebooks… I use a private ebook torrent website to get ebooks. On it, people can request certain books, and you get rewarded for uploading them to the site. My little sister lives with my parents in a city with a library system that allows access to thousands of ebook...
4
4.5
1367247567
1367254139
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41
[deleted]: TIFU by trusting my mom. My parents have an appraisal/estate liquidation business. This past weekend, I helped them with an estate sale (garage sale with antiques). The deal was whomever helped them would get 50% of the profits. My cousin helped, as well, but refused to take money (she certainly doesn't ne...
3
13.666667
1367263460
1400095633
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5,067
XxgeekxX: TIFU It's my birthday, so my mum says she is going out to get something for my birthday surprise and will be back in about an hour, so I decide to shower and get ready for my birthday surprise. So I get out of the shower, and I don't have a towel but since I was home alone I walk to the dining room where ther...
76
66.671053
1367281084
1367372618
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5
[deleted]: TIFU by being positive This isn't just today but the past few days. A few days ago I got an email from Canada Post (Canadian Postal Service) saying that I had a package coming to me. It was registered with ExpressPost, which is a 5 day shipping thing, so I was wondering what it was. Figured it was from a fr...
4
1.25
1367283098
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40
[deleted]: TIFU by getting an erection Pardon the lack of detail that everyone loves in TIFU's, but I'm feeling really tired. Me and my girlfriend are 18, and we each still live at home. Today while we were at her house, her step-dad was in his chair on his computer behind us while we were on the couch. Well at some p...
7
5.714286
1367281862
1367349036
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45
TheFattestMatt: TIFU by complementing a middle-aged mans dog. I work at a liquor store, so obviously I see a plethora of people daily. I work mostly in the "Deli section" (we sell a pretty big amount of food). While customers are trying to figure out what they want to eat a lot of pointless small talk occurs. Today...
4
11.25
1367285976
1367293574
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38
unicornsaretuff: TIFU and forgot a guest's birthday... At one of my tables. Her husband wrote, "You forgot my wife's birthday! Booooooo!!!!!!" on the check and left a dollar on $60. I'm not even upset about the tip. I feel really, really bad. [deleted]: I'm so sorry -- did he tell you about this beforehand, though? (So...
4
9.5
1367291627
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29
jwpark05: TIFU by quitting my internship I had finals coming up and I knew I couldn't do both, so I called my boss and told him I had to quit. He said he was disappointed by not letting me know ahead of time, especially since I built good relationships with everyone at the job. How should I respond back? JamesonRx: Why...
6
4.833333
1367309695
1367361691
t3_1de2po
t5_2to41
6
EVILGR33NRNGR: The real question is why the fuck would guys WANT to play organized volleyball, I've been out of highschool for awhile but uh....that sounds like the anti-poon. TreeLove520: It attracts lot of volleyball girls. And everyone knows, volleyball girls tend to be hot. Mal3man: Spandex and large butts. TreeLo...
4
1.5
1367285577
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Professor_Derpsalot: TIFU when an attempt to be silly went HORRIBLY wrong. So today in my highschool chemistry class we had an lab to do. So last night I emailed my teacher and asked if, just to be silly, I could bring in a gas mask to wear instead of safety glasses. She emails me back and gives me the OK as long as I ...
3
14.666667
1367304559
1367305681
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yaypothead: TIFU by bleeding all over my favorite pair of pyjamas and drinking a bit of my period blood (NSFW) So okay... bit of a backstory here: I'm a late bloomer and I haven't gotten my period yet. And I'm at home because there's no school in April or May (I live in the Philippines). The last two days I've been h...
3
16.333333
1367307705
1367376958
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55
Cmethvin: TIFU by trying to replace my wives broken Galaxy S3 glass. "Here goes nothing"... Is something I really shouldn't say, ever. My wife broke her screen by dropping it from her pocket (without the case I bought her, mind you), so I got the brilliant idea to try and replace it. I went and bought a replacement ...
7
7.857143
1367293710
1367320173
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17
aliaschick559: TIFU in the shower Long day of teaching was finally out of the way and I decided to hop in the shower before correcting. I get in the shower and everything is going swell. Arms: check. Legs: check. Downtown: check. My uptown girls: check. Then I go to shave. I grab the razor in a haphazard motion from th...
3
5.666667
1367309209
1367445571
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digitalyss: TIFU by almost drowning myself in mid-air I smoked a little weed with my husband about an hour ago and was sitting here watching Bloopers from *The Big Bang Theory*. I had some minor air-chuckles, was taking some sips of water, and all the sudden [Wolowitz lays this one out](http://youtu.be/VPDkgFNFtxg?t=6m...
4
30.25
1367304178
1367335710
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14
EsotericVerbosity: TIFU A Final Project for which I had all semester... Teacher gives us all semester on the final online HW. No help in class, he has been saying this whole time that we "have no reason not to get a 100%." All my classmates told me, "I *have* to get to work on it ASAP all semester," I finally take the...
3
4.666667
1367325729
1367362235
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8
Saljooghi1: Handed in an assignment 9 weeks ago, teacher finally got around to marking them, turns out he can't find mine Just got this e-mail " Hi Saljooghi1, I have been marking IPT assignments and realised that yours is not here. Can you email me it today please. Do not modify it as I need to see the last modifie...
6
1.333333
1367337481
1367385570
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1,400
flatmop: TIFU by accidentally flashing my dick at the window cleaner So I got home and the window cleaners were in the neighbourhood. I really needed a piss, so as soon as the guy had been paid I went upstairs to the bathroom to relieve myself. The blinds were open (you can see where this is going), but I thought; "meh...
5
280
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[deleted]: TIFU Okay so me and my friend are playing minecraft and me being the dumbass I am, I decide to make a fireplace. Not a bad idea right? Wrong. It set the next house and a whole tree on fire. Now he's pissed and i have to rebuild all of it. (It's a big ass house, and tree) Thecobra117: This isn't really that b...
3
1.333333
1367346265
1367436535
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Bryguy9: TIFU By listening to a lesbians problems Alright so I'm in Spanish class and the girl who sits next to me is a very open lesbian (not that I have any problem with that we're actually pretty friendly) So she began talking to me about her HOMOSEXUAL relationship problems, and as I'm just sitting there listening ...
5
10.4
1367351886
1367429291
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2,045
damonx99: TIFU By walking in on Office Sex I work in medium sized office as a web designer/ what ever else is needed. I had to go to the server room to grab a few cables...then I hear it. This heavy thudding noise coming above the cabinet. It's steady and a bit muffed. My first thought was that something was bein...
16
127.8125
1367352479
1367912304
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216
[deleted]: TIFU by getting fired for "talking about sex" This was almost a week ago. I was a vet tech at a very busy veterinary clinic in my area. A couple of girls that were not busy at the time and I were taking a short break in the office. We started talking about movies and if we'd seen any good ones lately. Now,...
8
27
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kingofkomedy23: TIFU by mowing the grass So today as i was mowing the grass at my house (note: I live on a lake with a large hill leading into it) I began like any other time by putting in my Ipod. I Finished the top half of the yard and was moving onto the hill oblivious to everything when suddenly my legs began to f...
4
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jawntron: TIFU by calling my girlfriend a bumpkin I thought that bumpkin was a nice thing to say... until I looked up the definition later. She is pissed. Noun 1. bumpkin - a person who is not very intelligent or interested in culture Don't be fooled by the cute nature of the word. Stick with something lame like "hon...
3
9.333333
1367357418
1367451799
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29
[deleted]: TIFU by hitting myself in the face with a stick. So earlier today, I was in powerfit class, which is basically just workout class. On leg day, one third of the class is on the basketball court and supposedly doing various leg workouts, but really just fucking around. Today, we had a sub teacher, which meant...
3
9.666667
1367360815
1367450160
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3
[deleted]: TIFU Saying "let's break up" one too many times to my girlfriend :( Background Story: Basically I was going out with my ex for around one and a half years. This is the girl of my dreams and I love her a lot, but just recently we began fighting a lot because of my jealousy issues, where she would be talking ...
6
0.5
1367360204
1367430000
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Alfaa123: TIFU By not looking and hitting a woman with my car. Me and my Girlfriend were just leaving a restaurant and I was making a right turn onto a major road. I was looking left to see the traffic, see and opening and start rolling. Suddenly the lady was there. I hit the brakes, but it was already too late. Tod...
5
15.8
1367360623
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r0baj0b: TIFU By forgetting to wash my hands... So, I have this chilli plant in my Kitchen, and these bastards are hot. The day I bought it I tried one just as I was about to drive home. It blew my face off and I felt like I was driving drunk. When ever I use them, I have to scrape the seeds out...unless I want nuclear...
3
19.333333
1367362209
1367432127
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194
randomAnonymousThing: TIFU by not checking my Yoga pants So after a long winter I finally decided to get my ass off the chair and exercise for a bit. I put on some old white yoga pants I have and went off. After walking for about a block or so, I start having the strange feeling everyone is staring at me. I keep goi...
7
27.714286
1367293531
1368226077
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4
VAL3R13: TIFU by spilling a concoction of gross old milk literally ALL over and around my bed, right before i was gonna get in it. i'm in college and sometimes i can be a lazy slob. so i was making my bed just now, exhausted from a hard day's work, and when i went to spread out my comforter, a huge cup of days old milk...
3
1.333333
1367374772
1367376318
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30
Flannapel: TIFU by shitting on myself I went to take my usual morning shit, and the fiber I've been having more of did what it does. I'll spare the details but let's say it was a mess. I cleaned myself up, or thought I did, and then went to class. What I missed is that some shit got on the inside of the back of my shir...
3
10
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For_fucks_sake_man: TIFU by trying to leave my gf. If you read my last post you know I just can't win. So its been while since the last tale I posted so I filled you good folks in on the latest development. Me and the crazy 'ol lady been having problems. Shit just ain't been right since I smashed her in the face with h...
4
6.75
1367379308
1367443598
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[deleted]: Today, I got fired for going to work high. I really fucked up, and I only blame myself. The real reason I am writing it is just to make my voice and remind myself of how stupid I am. I went to work high multiple times and I finally got fired. I honestly thought that I was being sneaky and nobody knew. But ap...
4
17
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jwpark05: TIFU by inviting my ex-girlfriend to my graduation dinner. Not sure if this was the right move. But she supported my ass the last semester and even though she kicked me out, she helped me through it. She moved on with her ex-bf (they got back together), I still think about her from time to time. Don't know wh...
6
1.333333
1367383834
1367439143
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11
Bryguy9: TIFU by drinking tequila well actually this was a few years ago So I was a sophomore in high school and I went to a school that had a real deal soccer team, who happened to be playing our rival school in the state finals one fine friday evening. So because I think I'm cool hanging out with some of my uppercl...
3
3.666667
1367287413
1367443236
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4
Sneak_Stealth: TIFU by getting super glue in my laptop's display port and having to spend 6 hours with acetone trying to clean it our The other day I accidentally messed up my audio jack and I went to super glue it, but in the process I accidentally got super glue into the display connector. I then had to spend 6 hours...
3
1.333333
1367386357
1367462060
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xXFLAVORSXx: TIFU by seeing my best friends grandma naked So the whole thing starts out with me helping my friend move into his new apartment. We leave for a while to get stuff from his moms house who his grandma lives with, well she is like a mom so we were in her room talking to her and i hear his grandmas door open ...
4
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candypaint: TIFU by leaving my car unlocked I came home late Sunday night from volunteering at the Nikes Women's Half Marathon in DC. I ate some dinner and went to bed. It was raining all day on Monday so I spent the day home applying to jobs. I just recently finished up my last class over the weekend and I am gradu...
4
13.5
1367416961
1367436030
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t5_2to41
7
TheRealRobMonty: TIFU by deleting my main account I have used reddit for roughly 18 months on /u/Pheenixm and today my friend announced my username for the entire soccer team to hear. I get a lot of crap on soccer, and not wanting to give my teammates any more ammo, I snapped and deleted the account. Impulsive and stup...
4
1.75
1367420402
1367541448
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247
unicornrage: TIFU by almost drowning and possibly flashing a bunch of children and old people at the pool Today I went to the community pool with my SO in hopes of learning how to swim. Our side of the pool was filled with old ladies and there were a bunch of children having a swimming class on the other side of the po...
11
22.454545
1367429118
1368104877
null
t5_2to41
5,514
stupid-enabler: TIFU by agreeing to have sex with my boyfriend's "best friend" This happened Saturday night/Sunday morning but I only just found out what really happened so the TI part still applies right? My (22F) boyfriend (25M) and I have been seeing each other for almost two years and living with each other for mo...
10
551.4
1367433976
1367596201
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35
ThrowawayPooper2: TIFU By drinking coffee.. Due to the fact that this is super fucking embarrassing I had to make a throwaway account.. So our entire apartment complex was notified of an inspection that was going to take place today. And as normal I procrastinated cleaning until this morning at 7am an hour before my l...
5
7
1367438380
1367588175
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24
Elrey007: TIFU by trying to play sports No throwaway because everyone already knows. So I'm in high school taking a team sports class and I'll be the first to admit that I suck at sports. All semester I've been doing fairly well, participating, even scoring two goals once. Then comes the end of the semester, the fin...
4
6
1367439081
1367525524
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160
ebenhaim: TIFU by dropping multiple condoms while on a date - borrow a blazer from a friend for this date party at some bar. - be pregaming at my friends place. friend gives me a condom. i put it in the jacket pocket. - meet my date (blind date, meeting her for the 1st time) at the venue. - have a good time. getting d...
6
26.666667
1367448045
1367524228
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34
lemonhead75: TIFU By forgetting that its Wednesday Okay, so I have very few friends. I rarely hang out with anyone. Except on Wednesday, when my friend Luke and his sister visit so we can hang out in my sisters room and play video games. His sister usually texts my sister to let us know when they are coming over, and ...
4
8.5
1367468583
1367542236
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34
confessiontimeisnow: TIFU my vigina lips got streached out and now my v looks messed up This actually happened when I was 7? About. I have super sensitive skin and sometimes my v would itch a bunch so an easy way to make the itch go away is to pull on them. ( I think I just needed to take a shower more often because of...
8
4.25
1367470227
1367556910
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25
imessedupsomuch: TIFU by making my boyfriend think I want to have sex with other guys I asked him if he ever wanted to have sex with other people, I was wondering because he lost his virginity to me and both of us are fairly young and have been together for 2 years. I didn't make it clear that I seriously do NOT want...
8
3.125
1367469842
1367615459
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113
turkeyclub337: TIFU by laughing mid-blowjob. It wouldn't have happened if we weren't 69ing. Nothing good ever comes when you 69. Nobody ever comes. Something about the way his legs were laying there like a weird, floppy, frog made me laugh hysterically and it was SO awkward. My laughter totally ruined the mood for like...
8
14.125
1367471477
1367592841
null
t5_2to41
23
friendscanbecrazy: TIFU by accidentally seeming to come on to a friend (both girls) and she freaked out. Have you ever done this? We're pretty close friends. We've had a kind of intense friendship recently because I've been around a lot while she's been breaking up with a really physically and emotionally abusive boyfr...
6
3.833333
1367482870
1367547242
null
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68
Just_a_tree: TIFU By not charging my cellphone Hey there my fellow TIFUers. Long time lurker, first time poster. I fucked up majorly. Here's what happened. Let me start with this morning. Er, yesterday morning. Took breakfast to my parents, whom I take care of as my father has Alzheimer's. He's back to forgetting me. ...
5
13.6
1367501678
1367889510
t3_1djngm
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18
[deleted]: /r/spacedicks.... why??? why???? Doom2508: For teh trolls. And as a fellow Yr11 student with a school that blocks alot of stuff, please tell me how you avoided the schools blocks, it may not work for me cause I live in Australia, but its worth a shot [deleted]: We're on the east coast USA, we installed a ho...
11
1.636364
1367500713
1367531428
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98
aMalfunction: TIFU by picking up a shift for a coworker. So, this actually happened on 3/30/2013. I had been working for a few months as an Assistant Manager at a local convenience store, let's call it Casie's, and as such it was my responsibility to fill in for sick/unavailable coworkers. Now there was another Assi...
5
19.6
1367510498
1367518672
null
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4
Boogidy: TIFU by leaving for work 5 minutes late. I didn't think it'd be a big deal to leave 5 minutes later than normal, since I normally get to work about 25 minutes early. *WRONG* I arrived just a couple of minutes before clock-in time. Leaving 5 minutes late = Spending 20 more minutes in traffic. Just... nope. j...
3
1.333333
1367499744
1367863659
null
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1
[deleted]: TIFU by listening to dubstep Hello again. Minor Fuck up but decided to post this anyway. I had to plug my laptop in and I had headphones with music playing. Now usually when his happens I pull my head back a little and the earbuds come off my ears. Not today. I pulled my head back hard and the damn thing unp...
3
0.333333
1367503851
1367596956
null
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30
BlueLinchpin: TIFU by diverting my cat's vomit It's 7 AM and I'm woken up by my cat mewing and pawing at me. I am half asleep and giving him confused "Fuck do you want?" looks and trying to get him to shut up and cuddle me when he suddenly starts getting ready to throw something up. In my dazed, half-awake state I re...
5
6
1367503252
1367557704
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37
mungboot: TIFU by waking up my kids way too early I have two toddlers, they have a tendency to wake up before me and go to the playroom to entertain themselves until I get up to deal with them. This morning I just assumed they did that, so I called them as soon as I woke up only to discover they were both still in thei...
6
6.166667
1367521648
1367935155
null
t5_2to41
749
Moosemaster21: TIFU for a number of reasons... All because I didn't do my laundry. To set the background, I dated a girl for a year and a half and we very recently broke up. She at one point bought pink spandex for running, but they were too big for her, and since I wear compression shorts for underwear, I told her I'd...
7
107
1367528111
1367598535
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17
erock0546: TIFU (this year rather) by failing two classes. That brings the grand total to 4. Wanted to be a chem major. Got to spring semester of sophomore year, fucked up major, failed (F) two high level classes. Junior year switched to computer science. I love it, but this year (almost like clockwork) I have failed ...
4
4.25
1367534533
1367593077
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21
kimantor1: TIFU by mentioning the word jockstrap in a swimming changing room. I'm a year 11 student in England aside from doing your regular P.E. activities my school and is fortunate enough be paired with a leisure center and swimming pool. So what happened was: I had swimming in PE and our teacher lets us muck a...
4
5.25
1367535464
1367540318
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61
unsafespeeds: TIFU by cutting jalapenos and then taking a leak. Yep. Didn't even think about it. A few minutes later the bottom of my tool was burning like fire. I called my mom (a nurse) who laughed and then told me to take a shower, which seems to have done a good job of making it go away. Not a good day to be ...
4
15.25
1367529768
1367597308
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12
[deleted]: TIFU by trying to cut my own hair. Now, I've cut my own hair, er, trimmed it, a few times before. Last night I decided my hair was too long for my liking and clipped away with the scissors. I get out of the shower, go to bed, then I get up and look in the mirror again. Then, I decided that my bangs were stil...
6
2
1367529262
1367586029
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30
unicornmaster19: TIFU by playing a game. This didn't happen today, but a few weeks ago; however, it is still one of the most embarrassing things that has ever happened to me. In class, I sat down by some of my friends and they were playing would you rather. Like all would you rather games, the questions range from nor...
4
7.5
1367552583
1367594801
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26
[deleted]: TIFU because I freaked out and overreacted to my girlfriend My girlfriend is going through some stressful stuff right now and while she was talking to me about it I tried making a lighthearted comment to hopefully cheer her up. Didn't work and she got upset with me and claimed that I wasn't paying attention ...
3
8.666667
1367583386
1367583743
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5
[deleted]: Asshat School Drivers I'm writing this in first period of the day, and this happened less than an hour ago. So I go to a big high school and thus, we have a big parking lot. In order to leave the school parking lot at the end of the day, we use the zipper method, where one car in one of the lines leaves the...
3
1.666667
1367582029
1367588469
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7
[deleted]: TIFU by giving my folks my old Roku box, and sharing my Netflix acct with them BEFORE editing my instant queue. Actually yesterday I TIFU. My Mom called me up this morning and was like "son, we need to talk about your movie selections." iknewyoubackinnam: My Little Pony and Cannibal Holocaust?? [deleted]: My...
4
1.75
1367580011
1367597847
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172
[deleted]: TIFU by eating Chilli Ok so lately I've been eating spicier and spicier Chilli and I decided to make my own chilli sauce. I blended Ghost Chilli, habanero extract and pure capsaicin with vinegar and it was beautiful. I decided I would have more than usual on my dinner last night and it has reacted badly with...
6
28.666667
1367592898
1367628071
null
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21
Throwthatshitaway101: TIFU by revealing my sexual perversity So I got this girl's number through work. She's nice. She's fun. She's cool. We're texting, shooting shit, when she says she is a fluffophile. Naturally, I have no idea what that is. A fluffophile is a person who has sex with furries. Like she was saying she ...
17
1.235294
1367595245
1367643431
null
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810
[deleted]: TIFU by going commando and forgetting to zip my fly So I was out of a clean underwear supply, and as uni was beckoning I decided to let myself hang loose for the day, with a plan of washing the clothes tomorrow. The jeans that I usually wear are basically the type that really widen in the crotch area when I ...
16
50.625
1367590210
1368179510
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7
[deleted]: TIFU by accidentaly making fun of a kid with bad grades Today I found a grade report with zeroes everywhere. It had a 36% in the class. This is extremely low where I live, so as a joke I went up to all my friends and said, "Hey look, I found your grades!" and then laughing. But apparently, with one of my fri...
3
2.333333