start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1368817884 | 1368992982 | null | t5_2to41 | 43 | whatsonyourarm: TIFU by jerking off early in the morning
not actually today, but 2 days ago. since i woke up early on this particular morning & being a teenager, i figured i had time to jerk off quickly. i guess kind of to get it out of the way so i finished & went about my morning routine. about an hour later,... | 5 | 8.6 | |
1368838955 | 1368839645 | null | t5_2to41 | -2 | [deleted]: TIFU by ignoring a car full of black boys hollering at me
I'm a fairly nice looking, skinny, blonde girl. I get yelled at/honked at by men in cars all the time (I got to college, so I must walk everywhere) and it **drives me crazy**. I always ignore it because I have a boyfriend, you hollering at me from a... | 4 | -0.5 | |
1368839645 | 1368892821 | null | t5_2to41 | 114 | madrespect: TIFU by taking a sip of my own piss
I was going to use a throwaway for this but fuck it, I deserve to be shit on for this.
This actually happened about a week ago at a good friend's college graduation party. I was pretty drunk and decided to piss into an empty beer cup. My friend and I usually fuck with pe... | 4 | 28.5 | |
1368847354 | 1369166848 | null | t5_2to41 | 80 | currently_incognito: TIFU by playing ultimate dodgeball at school
So it's 7th period (last period) and I have gym class. Instead of playing basketball we play all by yourself dodgeball. So I'm all by myself against 20 other people. The game was really intense. Until the ball was thrown at me. The ball was thrown at my ... | 9 | 8.888889 | |
1368848846 | 1368947372 | null | t5_2to41 | 221 | [deleted]: TIFU by trusting a Chinese police officer
So, Yesterday I headed out of my apartment in southeast Beijing to go to the northeastern corner of the city. It was early afternoon (2ish) and I was going to meet a beauty that I had been chasing for the last few months. She was leaving for Hong Kong the next day so... | 5 | 44.2 | |
1368842770 | 1368922169 | null | t5_2to41 | 101 | [deleted]: TIFU by not realizing I did not have enough credits to graduate.
I, in my infinite wisdom, did not realize I did not have the required 120 credits to graduate instead I only had 112. This grand fuck up was a combination of my own stupidity in not talking to my adviser often enough and a shitty online student... | 5 | 20.2 | |
1368854139 | 1368922613 | null | t5_2to41 | 674 | thesementaster: TIFU by tasting my own ManMilk [NSFW]
I've been a virgin for so fucking long. Too long. I don't want to give numbers but, much longer than any of my friends. So naturally, when the opportunity came to have intercourse, I over thought things to a grave and dark extent.
So I was talking to this girl I've... | 7 | 96.285714 | |
1368866588 | 1368882552 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | Itz_DA_J3east: tifu by answering a phone
So I was sitting in front of my computer, plying computer games as I usually do. While I was happily shooting pixels the phone rang. Because my mother is silly and has a 10 second ring tone on the home phone and because my room is at the opposite side of the house than the phone... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1368871020 | 1368874516 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU By going on reddit while drunk
Ok . Am drunk. . I went on reddit. I think i responded to a comment or post. Ha oh yeah ask me smething. Wait no. Ooh i can voice type this . Hi reddit my name wait no ama not give you my name. Ok ok . Tifu by fucking my girlfriend while my wife was already sleepy . No tha... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1367013227 | 1368914310 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | krissee: TIFU by running into a mirrored pillar at West Edmonton Mall in front of a busy food court and then apologizing
ssjkriccolo: What a handsome fellow.
krissee: Lol the correct phrase would be what a handsome miss or what a pretty miss
ssjkriccolo: Doesn't sound like you missed at all.
krissee: Not really the co... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1368888837 | 1368919560 | null | t5_2to41 | 201 | Michealxfoo: TIFU by fapping with my phone...
So my dumb ass decides that I need to try and fap right after a fresh poo.. So, here I am, full mast, lubed up, going to town. When all of the sudden my lubed up hand starts to lose grip on my phone. Me being the idiot that I am thought It really wasnt that big of a deal an... | 9 | 22.333333 | |
1368905721 | 1369243840 | null | t5_2to41 | 602 | mistofsunshine: TIFU by putting on a pad... (NSFW)
Well its my time of the month and mother nature just knocked on the door.Behold the time that I very much despise and love at the same time! And of course the time when i get bitchy and lazy.Well lets get to my TIFU moment.Everything was going good until I woke up and ... | 10 | 60.2 | |
1368916344 | 1368927851 | null | t5_2to41 | 78 | cheapdialogue: TIFU by talking trash about an acquaintance...who was right behind me.
Classic move. Out drinking with friends, acquaintance joins uninvited, but leaves to grab his taco truck food. I take the opportunity to run my fucking mouth about how much he annoys me, which he kinda does, but not to the extent my d... | 7 | 11.142857 | |
1368940516 | 1368971184 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting jealous over a picture of my (now after tonight) ex-girlfriend with a friend.
I let my own hang ups and personal issues from my life and past relationship ruin this. I have a lot of jealousy issues. And now I'm sad and a bit heartbroken. The relationship was a week old and I managed to fuck i... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1368936590 | 1369005789 | null | t5_2to41 | 57 | Barflad: TIFU By fucking up twice in a day.
THE BATHROOM INCIDENT:
So I was at Wal-Mart and I decide I need to take a piss, bad. So I wander around until I find a bathroom (THANK GOD) and I rush in. To my surprise, there are no urinals, and it is empty. I'm really nervous about being 'that guy' that pisses and then ... | 26 | 2.192308 | |
1368936044 | 1368959910 | null | t5_2to41 | 1 | 3141592652: TIFU by forgetting mothers day
So I forgot to get my mother a gift on mothers day and I though it would be fine. Although what I did forget to also do is even say happy mothers day to her. I should have said something before but now my mom's upset thinking that I don't like her. I'm mad at myself that I eve... | 3 | 0.333333 | |
1368948672 | 1368978061 | null | t5_2to41 | 20 | Anal_Torpedo: TIFU by eating molding bread
So Reddit, I think I may have just fucked up real hard. I decided to get a late night snack in the dark, so I grabbed a hotdog bun from the package. In hindsight, it did feel a little stale, but I'll get to that later. So I get back to watching a movie and eating my delicious ... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1368977164 | 1369051730 | null | t5_2to41 | 786 | [deleted]: TIFU: Let my 8yr old niece use my new $1200 laptop and she dumped an entire bottle of water on it. It's toast
daredevil82: I would be so pissed.
Have her parents pay for the replacement, though. No way you should be responsible for eating that hit to the finances.
Edit: amazing how many people are willi... | 16 | 49.125 | |
1368980239 | 1368984464 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU: Sat around super bored and looking for something to do, found out the next day there was a convention I would have loved to go to.
This actually happened a little while ago but I feel it applies here anyway.
I had the day off work/school, no jobs to get done around the house, etc. I enjoyed relaxing ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1368981651 | 1368985776 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | PaxiSnack: TIFU I found a wallet...
It's my birthday today and I'm skimming the edge of life right now. What do I mean by that? I've got two bald tires on my car and one has a slow leak. I have to pump that tire up (150 strokes) to get it to 30 lbs of pressure almost every time I have to drive anywhere. At least I have... | 5 | 0.4 | |
1369001238 | 1369009763 | null | t5_2to41 | 40 | [deleted]: TIFU by swallowing a lot of cough medicine and caught myself not breathing several times
Scared straight. Won't be doing that ever again.
thehuntedfew: call for medical assistance now -
This medication is safe, if you take it as directed. Unfortunately, many teenagers take extremely high amounts of this m... | 4 | 10 | |
1369003122 | 1369052380 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | edkisin: TIFU by using tick repellent directry on my skin
Well, today was farming day, and I was needed to do a lot of job outdoors. So I thought about applying mosquito repellent on my skin to not to be distracted by stings. There was two bottles of spray on the shelf - mosquito repellent and "do not apply directly on... | 3 | 4 | |
1369014822 | 1369042491 | null | t5_2to41 | 362 | Advancedphish: TIFU by eating pizza while nude.
So hungry, the pizza looked so good. I had managed to cook it perfectly and rushed to get a 400° (F) slice of awesome in my tummy. Instead I got it ON my tummy as well as my thigh. It actually pulled skin off of my thigh and it looks like I'm icing my vagina.
So much hur... | 6 | 60.333333 | |
1369017976 | 1369165559 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | chemman5: TIFU: By showing my mom r/spacedicks
I was talking to my mom about how nothing phases me, except spiders and r/spacedicks, thanks to Reddit. She then asked me what r/spacedicks was. Seeing as she's a lurker, and semi familiar with Reddit, she wanted to see it. I tried to convince her otherwise. But neverthele... | 6 | 4.333333 | |
1369021444 | 1369028807 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | rotorain: TIFU by smoking weed at the mall where I work
I work in an auto center at a large shopping mall, and after work today three other coworkers, one of their girlfriends, and I wanted to smoke a bowl and hang out after work. So we all drive up to the very top of the parking garage where there's no people, and sta... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1369029218 | 1369034390 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | [deleted]: TIFU by committing to a major I don't really have a future in.
Not really a today fuck up, but an in general and potential life fuck up. I'm a communication major in college with a focus in video editing and I'm going into my junior year now. I'm stuck in my major (which is actually a double major with theat... | 5 | 3.8 | |
1369037187 | 1369077008 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,367 | [deleted]: TIFU by pooping on Skype.
I met this really awesome guy at school. We went on a couple dates with the promise of more before returning home for the summer. I was a bit worried about losing him, but things have been great thanks to Skype. As our conversations have grown longer, we've started a little competit... | 6 | 227.833333 | |
1369041024 | 1369088420 | null | t5_2to41 | 39 | Kaiteranaway: TIFU by taking my girlfriend to the supermarket
For most people this wouldn't have been a problem, but I'm a woman who has been in relationships with men up until now. The last relationship ended not so well with me telling him that I liked girls. So today I go shopping with my girlfriend, totally forgett... | 6 | 6.5 | |
1369045314 | 1369139947 | null | t5_2to41 | 13 | Kaiteranaway: Tifu by writing a tifu post
Earlier tonight I wrote a tifu post labeld "tifu by taking my girlfriend to the supermarket" I focused on writing this for far too long. Now my girlfriend is upset and won't talk to me. While I was in the shower she took the car and went for a drive. I'm worried that she is lo... | 5 | 2.6 | |
1369028117 | 1369071982 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by putting incest in my english test
So today I had my half yearlies test, I'm year 10. We had a creative writing task to do and I read a story on r/nosleep which had a pretty good plot twist saying the sister got raped by the brother but I changed it around abit. Then, after I realized how bad it sound... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1369044630 | 1369051206 | null | t5_2to41 | 67 | [deleted]: TIFU by literally shattering my childhood
When I was a kid, people would give me all these cutesy figurines. Mostly elephants, a few angels and pigs and stuff mixed in. Never really liked them all that much, but kept them on display anyway. We moved a few times, they always survived the move okay. I waited a... | 4 | 16.75 | |
1369051955 | 1369072190 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | LoganPhyve: TIFU... my sister discovered my cup o' jizz in the fridge
My sister was over to babysit my two kids... and happened to find the semen sample I have to bring to the lab. Having had a recent vasectomy, they wanted to test me to make sure I'm sterile and stay that way.
My sister happened to see the lab sample... | 4 | 1 | |
1369062098 | 1369268013 | null | t5_2to41 | 29 | farqueue2: TIFU by baking shirtless
Well not today..
Long time listener, first time caller..
I just moved into my place back in November.. Around December, middle of summer here, I had some pastizzis baking in the oven. It was a scorching hot day, so I was just casually walking around the house shirtless wearing som... | 7 | 4.142857 | |
1369062277 | 1369099030 | null | t5_2to41 | 113 | Biggie313: TIFU by having sex with the front door open.
Left the bar and stopped at my GF's house. Her little sister was asleep, parents at work, little brother out. She was supposed to pick him at at 11, and it was only 10:20pm. So out of no where she starts fooling around with me, turns to a BJ, but I'm buzzed so I t... | 4 | 28.25 | |
1369072272 | 1369361015 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | [deleted]: TIFU by friendzoning my crush unintentionally
Okay, this wasn't today, it was awhile back but I keep thinking about it. Let me start off by mentioning my parents used to always fight and argue all night while I was home which affected little freshman me very much in school. Anyways, one Friday at school, the... | 20 | 1.1 | |
1369076717 | 1370453540 | null | t5_2to41 | 3,040 | Ask_Me_If_Im_Racist: TIFY by experimenting and exploding a glass bottle inside my ass
Let me preface this with the acknowledgement that no, I am not a genius, but I *am* a reasonably smart guy. Unfortunately, I am nontheless a *guy*, which also means when I'm horny, I'm motherfuckin *horny*.
I recently got a pretty g... | 11 | 276.363636 | |
1369072643 | 1369088520 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | [deleted]: (TIFU) Missed School
Today I was sick for the first time in months, and at the worst time. Today was supposed to be the day that I took these Standardized tests for my biology class, but now I'm going to have to probably miss easy day classes and stuff by making them up tomorrow. The worst part is that I was... | 3 | 4 | |
1369081353 | 1369151140 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | Thisisathrowawayuser: TIFU by signing my crush's yearbook and leaving a note in her locker.
So today was pretty horrible for me. Also, throwaway because some people I know at school browse Reddit and this subreddit quite frequently. And the last thing I need is someone to find out all of my dirty secrets
Today was one... | 6 | 8.333333 | |
1369081217 | 1369276168 | null | t5_2to41 | 40 | Skwirleywirley: TIFU by being a true amateur photographer.
**Story time:**
Got up today to take some pics, since I was in that mood, y'know? So I get up and head out the door with the Botanical Garden in mind. Fine. Gas on empty, but it's okay it's like a few blocks from where I live.
I get to the BG and the shit's c... | 5 | 8 | |
1369089150 | 1369174168 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | marmaladeybeget: TIFU by missing an exam worth 50% of the module.
So, my calendar starts every week showing the Sunday, not the Monday, meaning that where Tuesday is on most regular calendars, on mine it shows Monday. The exam date/time/room etc is all written in the Monday box and has been there for about six weeks, b... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1369087520 | 1369100783 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | [deleted]: TIFU UPDATE: IT'S ALIVE!!! (LAPTOP)
So, I took the laptop to my sauna and let it sit in there for a few hours, it got nice and steaming hot, booted it up and no bootable drive was found. I was happy it booted to anything. Kept it in there a few more hours and then charged it over night.
Still booted up, tur... | 4 | 8.75 | |
1369094091 | 1369120353 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by stealing my bf's phone and found out he's emailing women
I took his phone and found some emails he's been writing. I was so hurt becuase we recently broke up due to trust issues on both end. I though this time would be different and we forgave and said not again. When i confronted him about it he fli... | 3 | 3 | |
1369096702 | 1369142015 | null | t5_2to41 | 113 | soysaus: TIFU by breaking into my nude, sleeping, neighbor's home.
My neighbor asked me to dog/house sit for her family while they were on vacation. They weren't supposed to be home until late tonight so she said if I wanted to I could go check up this morning. For some reason I woke up at 5 am and couldn't sleep so I ... | 4 | 28.25 | |
1369101418 | 1369192823 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | bebe13: TIFU by nearly killing myself with insulin.
Ok, so first you may need a bit of education on type 1 diabetes. In my case I have 4 injections of insulin a day, one kind I have which is short acting I have 3 times a day, once for breakfast once for lunch and once for dinner this covers the meal I'm having but does... | 10 | 3.5 | |
1369095335 | 1369162025 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | CaptainNirvana: TIFU by telling a black guy to go back to Africa.
I was at my class before the bell rang and I was sitting there alone when I saw my friend, who is black. Him and I always send each other videos and would always quote them. So I was quoting this one really funny video (I'm too lazy to post the link but ... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1369103156 | 1369114995 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | Ninjuninju: TIFU by harming an innocent little mole, which might die now
I was on my way to bring in the trash cans this afternoon when I saw a dust ball like figuring moving on the road. It came towards me and ran away towards my neighbor. My neighbors cat was on the road and ignored the dust ball. As I kept surveying... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1369108920 | 1369158875 | null | t5_2to41 | 20 | thatgirl23: TIFU by falling asleep during the SAT's
This actually happened about a year ago now. Basically the SAT was at 7 or 8 in the morning on a Saturday but I was going to my friend's prom on the Friday before. I think we all know what happened. I slept over at a friends (let's call her Isabelle) house with one ot... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1369105372 | 1369225926 | null | t5_2to41 | 37 | iamsheena: TIFU by putting eight hundred dollars toward my phone bill.
I use online banking to pay my cell phone bill and my tuition. I finally had money after receiving my income tax and money from my employer's bankruptcy to pay for my tuition, which would then have the hold taken off my account, allowing my marks to... | 6 | 6.166667 | |
1369132430 | 1369191961 | null | t5_2to41 | 146 | Sherlockhomey: TIFU when I shifted late and blew my transmission, starting a culmination of events that inevitably left me homeless (temporarily), single and completely stripped of all my pride and belongings.
OH GOD I can't believe I'm actually mustering up the courage to tell this story. Let me just start out by sayi... | 6 | 24.333333 | |
1369148876 | 1369269727 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,145 | ChefTedLogan: TIFU by reporting my car stolen to the police when, in fact, I had just forgotten where I parked it.
I worked 36 hours in three days...but that's no excuse. After work on Sunday, I went to a bar with one of my managers to blow off some steam from the hectic weekend. I had a few too many and had my girlf... | 9 | 127.222222 | |
1369153128 | 1369157621 | null | t5_2to41 | 43 | 8plur8: TIFU by taking my sleep meds this morning instead of my anxiety meds...
*Backstory:* I take a lot of meds for a variety of reasons (migraines being the main issue) throughout the day, so I have a green afternoon pill case, a purple evening pill case, and since I only have to take an anti-anxiety pill in when I ... | 7 | 6.142857 | |
1369168030 | 1369246330 | null | t5_2to41 | 83 | Chicken_Pocks: TIFU by cutting my boyfriends penis.
So we were standing as he was doing me from behind. Felt great, so hot, we were going wild. He commenced dirty talk and told me to touch myself while he fucked me. I start rubbing my love button and moaning but the change of angle causes his penis to pop out as he is ... | 6 | 13.833333 | |
1369161862 | 1369452216 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | TheWierdSide: IFU a couple of years ago by locking my car while it was running.
/u/ChefTedLogan inspired me to submit my also car related fuck up. this happened a few years ago while i was still in college.
When i first got my drivers license it became a habit for me, that when i turn off the car to get out, i lock my... | 8 | 1.75 | |
1369162423 | 1370372029 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | possiblethyroidissue: TIFU by wearing light gray shorts on a hot day
It's hot today. It's 85 degrees, but the humidity is oppressive. I have these pair of light gray shorts, sort of dressy. I like them. But TIL *not* to wear them in heat.
I go walking daily. I do this for exercise (I've lost a lot of weight recently),... | 4 | 2.5 | |
1369175341 | 1369284482 | null | t5_2to41 | 147 | goddangdangit: TIFU by Getting semen everywhere [NSFW Language]
Been single for quite a while now and going on close to year without sexy times. This has resulted in some pretty epic hour plus fap sessions every few days.
So I'm sitting in bed about 4 AM this morning doing the five knuckle shuffle (insomnia) while wat... | 10 | 14.7 | |
1369180549 | 1369182525 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | SeniorHuevos22: TIFU Started a fire in my garage loft.
Today I decided to play with fire in my loft in the garage. I mixed about a quart of water with a little bit of gas thinking okay maybe it won't burn for very long. I WAS WRONG! The container I was using was made out of clay the fucker burned for at least an hour a... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1369184401 | 1369202475 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | NotJustKneeDeep: TIFU by coming in late to work, while on probation, and might be on the verge of losing my job. Shit!
So,
I moved from one state to another to pursue a job. This is not only a very great stepping stone into what could potentially be my dream job, but the job is very, very easy. It pays well and it's ... | 4 | 4.75 | |
1369183733 | 1369211634 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | lukedarooster: TIFU ice cream
Just like five 30 minutes ago, i came home from work and stopped at the store and decided to get two tubs of ice cream cause i'm cool like that. i walk in my house and my brother is talking to me about something he read online so i set the bags down and after his conversation I was distrac... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1369195294 | 1369248242 | null | t5_2to41 | 15 | SubvertedAI: TIFU by sending a message to the wrong person.
Me and my friends like to play games with Skype open.
This evening we were playing, and one of my friends (let's call him jake) was not making the best decisions, so I tried to give him some advise, then he got defensive and started blaming other people.
My ot... | 4 | 3.75 | |
1369197860 | 1369286232 | null | t5_2to41 | 27 | farqueue2: TIFU by locking myself in my garage.
Getting ready to leave for work yesterday.. I'm walking into the garage (through the access door in the adjoining house) with my hands quite fill.. Lock the door on my way out of the house, and once the door is shut I realised that I left my keys in the house.
I could g... | 9 | 3 | |
1369209013 | 1369547120 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | ssjkriccolo: TIFU by using Steam
I love Steam. I love their awesome deals. I just got the new Tomb Raider for like 20 bucks the other day. So when I saw Dead Space 1 and 2 I figured, "wow people say great things about that game" and it's only 10 bucks for both. So I purchased em... and then saw that they were released ... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1369210598 | 1369252727 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | daemonikskr: TIFU by tripping over my teacher
She tripped and lost two teeth because of me :(
totallynotmyalterego: Could you elaborate on this? Why, etc.
daemonikskr: Well she was walking to the back of the room to have a conversation with another teacher but I got up at the same time and I mustve kicked her leg or so... | 5 | 5.2 | |
1369220285 | 1369350162 | null | t5_2to41 | 181 | [deleted]: TIFU by letting my grandmother find one of my used condoms in my dog's poop
Great way to start my Wednesday morning.
This past weekend I was lucky enough to have my family gone for the whole day, so I invited my girl over. We had sex and I threw the condom wrapped in a tissue into my trash can. Fast forwar... | 6 | 30.166667 | |
1369227262 | 1369460264 | null | t5_2to41 | 2,474 | jana007: TIFU by taking medical advice from my mom.
Yesterday I had lunch with my mom and I told her about my back pain and how it had been a few days and I think I might be dying... bla bla bla. She pulls out her prescription bottle of "muscle relaxers" and says "Go ahead and take one of these, it'll help make the mus... | 17 | 145.529412 | |
1369236584 | 1369247352 | null | t5_2to41 | 36 | [deleted]: TIFU by spitting in the water i was about to wash my face in
I was going out for dinner and wanted to wash my face, unfortunatly I also had to spit, so why not combine the two?
So naturally, i filled my hands with water, spat in the water and splashed/rubbed it all over my face.
Have in mind, this wasn't o... | 8 | 4.5 | |
1369242688 | 1369244646 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | evilsforreals: TIFU and almost got fired
Alright, I'm a Student Manager of Campus Summer Services at my University for the Summer with three other students, two girls and one guy.
I told my roommate that it wasn't possible to room with him since he's not a Student Manager (some weird reason)
Yesterday was my day off... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1369243643 | 1369321298 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | [deleted]: TIFU by quitting my job.
I didn't show up for work yesterday or today. I didn't call either. I just don't feel like doing it anymore.
Of course, that leaves me with no income, and the first is quickly approaching. I just can't anymore, you know?
dobtoronto: It's okay that you fucked up.
You *can* ... | 4 | 8.25 | |
1369253053 | 1369275485 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | do-it-live: TIFU by closing an elevator door on an old lady's finger.
My work has this shitty elevator, like it creaks and stops working for no reason all the time. Also apparently the door does not have a sensor, or at least a WORKING sensor. I was late to work, and my office is on the 5th floor of the building. I run... | 6 | 3.833333 | |
1369254168 | 1369255198 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | handcoughed: TIFU by ingesting a lot of cough syrup
So about 24 hrs back I was smoking some weed and playing some FIFA with a couple of friends. It was all going pretty good before friend no. 1 decided he wanted to go to sleep and I had the random urge to ingest some cough syrup. Friend 2 actively encouraged me and I d... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1369257422 | 1369260918 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | Duhe25: today I f***** up by tripping and dropping my brand new Galaxy s4 before it was even out of the box into a bucket of water!
eternalflowers: This post makes me very angry for two reasons.
Reason number one: Did you rip all the punctuation keys off of your keyboard?
Reason number two: A FUCKING BRAND NEW S4 IN ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1369252289 | 1369281527 | null | t5_2to41 | 38 | theBCSsucks: TIFU by taking phenylephrine hcl
I've been feeling under the weather for the past couple of days. Things are crazy with work so I don't want to take any more time off. I'm feeling miserable and then in my desk, I remember I have some cold medicine. It says that it's for common colds.
So I pop one down the... | 4 | 9.5 | |
1369263782 | 1369398894 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,790 | Teeklin: TIFU by trying a "69" for the first time
So me and the new girlfriend have recently started exploring a bunch of new "firsts" for us in the bedroom. She has always been very anti-blowjob in her life, but she wanted to try it out with me and found that she actually loves it and now can't seem to get enough of ... | 15 | 119.333333 | |
1369265607 | 1369554408 | null | t5_2to41 | 21 | deano_frinko: TIFU by sticking my legs out
Today I had an exam, had a seat at on the very front row in a very large sports hall with about 200 people in it. Exam goes smoothly, invigilator calls to put our pens down and prepare our paper for collection. I decide to stretch out, the exam was three hours and my legs were... | 4 | 5.25 | |
1369274607 | 1370286552 | null | t5_2to41 | 27 | x420xNOxSCOPExBEASTx: TIFU by laughing at a gory picture in front of people.
So I'm at Starbucks, and I am sitting on a table. I am facing the window and my laptop screen (obviously) is facing the other direction, which is in view of the people who are behind me. I am viewing a gore thread (I'm not a sick, it was an as... | 6 | 4.5 | |
1369273046 | 1369538390 | null | t5_2to41 | 51 | nachtzeil: TIFU by raising my leg to fart
To preface this, I walked out of my kitchen, and I ripped one hard, perhaps too hard. So as I said, I walk out of my kitchen and then feel a fart coming up, and I decide to make this one known throughout the house. I raise my leg and put it on the ottoman next to me like [this.... | 6 | 8.5 | |
1369286204 | 1369286928 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | TonightsWhiteKnight: TIFU by scratching myself then getting distracted.
By no means is this my worst screw up, but definitely one of the stupidest.
Today as I was playing some Dota2 with friends online, I began to have that feeling most of us men have. That feeling of a deep and strange itch growing on the outer layer... | 4 | 5.5 | |
1369287573 | 1369311323 | null | t5_2to41 | 58 | oldmanriver1: TIFU by texting my boss instead of my brother.
I went to work - boss wasnt there. He's a really nice guy, but he's often late, doesnt pay me by the hour, and because it's just me and him, I cant get into the office to do any work if he's not there. And if I cant work - I cant get paid. I text him about wh... | 3 | 19.333333 | |
1369291171 | 1369471286 | null | t5_2to41 | 27 | ShakeTheLutece: TIFU and lost my job by being stubborn
I work(ed) in a furniture factory doing employment agency work on a temporary contract.
The manager is always getting on at me for having my hands in my pockets and I usually ignore him. Today though whilst I was looking for a trolley to stack some seats on he yel... | 9 | 3 | |
1369301122 | 1369332545 | null | t5_2to41 | 83 | TheMadHatterOnTea: TIFU by attempting to confess my like for my crush.
I arranged to meet my crush for coffee at 12 today so I could tell him about my feels. Surprisingly he accepted my offer and all seemed swell. However the class I was in ran waaaaay over time and as a result I was over 20 minutes late for my own mee... | 6 | 13.833333 | |
1369307885 | 1369363009 | null | t5_2to41 | 161 | notepad20: TIFU by making one tiny typo.
I put a decimal point one spot to the right of where it should have been.
This mistake is worth $600,000
[deleted]: Seriously? You 'lost' someone $600k? Details sir/ma'am!
notepad20: a rate in a multi million dollar contract, used for loans, investors, contractors, every thing.... | 5 | 32.2 | |
1369319646 | 1369321958 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | Joekite: TIFU by farting and shitting my pants
So today I got a little bit of diarrhea. So I started drinking liquids and all of the sudden I want to fart.
BAD IDEA. If you have diarrhea chances are. You're gonna end up popping yourself. Good thing I work at home
slider162: It is called a shart.
Joekite: a shart?
Ro... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1369322840 | 1369419094 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | NapalmUrethra: TIFU by wanking with chilli oil
This story starts with something I'm sure many redditors can relate to. Earlier today while browsing the internet during my day off I started to feel a bit horny. None of my housemates were in and because I've been so busy with coursework recently I hadn't beaten the meat ... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1369317818 | 1369399635 | null | t5_2to41 | 890 | Scotch_Rawks: TIFU by making the wrong joke at the wrong moment
So I was walking through a parking lot with my older brother, when I noticed a hilariously shitty parking job. I pointed it out and made a comment along the lines of "wow, how does somebody like that acquire a license?" to which my brother replied, "hey no... | 9 | 98.888889 | |
1369335971 | 1369344881 | null | t5_2to41 | 36 | MrUmibozu: TIFU by thinking my English final was on Friday.
It was Monday. Looks like I'm retaking that next semester.
Fuck me.
UPDATE
Today I did NOT fuck up. Final is actually tomorrow, just some misinformation.
SO relieved.
doctorku: I'm there with you, I missed my chem final by an hour got a zero on my 200 poi... | 4 | 9 | |
1369334948 | 1369411487 | null | t5_2to41 | 75 | austac06: TIFU by accidentally sending my college into shelter-in-place.
I work for a small, private liberal arts college in Albany, NY. Today, the weather was looking iffy, so I decided to bring my umbrella with me when I went to lunch. Unfortunately, my umbrella happens to look like [this](http://data.uncommongoods.c... | 6 | 12.5 | |
1369338955 | 1369340301 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | goddamnedkegels: TIFU by misfiring my love gun and engaging in friendly fire
I dont know why i am posting this. More as a PSA for fellow men. Here it goes.
I got home early and saw no one was home. I did what any young man with free time and a free house would do. I took my phone and sat down on a lawn chair we have a... | 3 | 2 | |
1369337313 | 1369348138 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by being inadvertently racsist.
My first day after returning to work after a 2 year LOA my immediate manager told me to go help Wayne outside. So I go outside, my store manager is outside with Wayne. I walk up, say hello the store manager and Wayne, he asked me what I was doing. I explained I was outsid... | 3 | 1 | |
1369352977 | 1369403394 | null | t5_2to41 | 930 | Gumby2369: TIFU by having a sudden urge to play Pokemon
So I was procasturbating as I normally do on my summer vacations and I stumbled upon a Pokemon meme. First mistake. I had the strong urge to throw Pokemon Ruby in the old Nintendo DS and train those little bastards till they could be trained no more. So began my e... | 7 | 132.857143 | |
1369357346 | 1369411595 | null | t5_2to41 | 462 | Oriva: TIFU by eating "hippie food" that caused me to shit on my boyfriend and myself.
Today I had a sexual experience that is comparable to a video on efuckt. I have never felt the need to throw up from being so embarrassed.It's going to be pretty long, just a heads up.
I should give you the preface; I have always ha... | 8 | 57.75 | |
1369362592 | 1369404692 | null | t5_2to41 | 16 | Garbagemn: TIFU by not checking for mosquitoes.
So I'm in an area of china that has a HUGE problem with (malarial) mosquitoes. I was lucky enough to find a really good mosquito net thing that goes on a bed. I drank a lot of beer and was a little tipsy. After listening to music for a few hours I decided to retire withou... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1369347986 | 1369427336 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | [deleted]: TIFU Sending a co-worker a message about what erotic costume i would buy, meant to be for my partner
Send my co-worker 3 pictures of costumes i was considering buying. Princess Leia in the gold bikini, R2-D2 dress or a gameboy style dress. Was meant to go to my partner to pick which one he wanted.
jorwyn: E... | 4 | 3 | |
1369365010 | 1369603619 | null | t5_2to41 | 13 | bencil: TIFU by getting hot sauce in my eye.
The scene: a crowded mall in NOVA. I'm wearing a coat and formal clothes and glasses because I'm coming straight from work.
It was a long day and I decided to treat myself to some fast food. I went to the mall right by my train station and get some taco bell. As I'm sitting... | 3 | 4.333333 | |
1369367578 | 1369371380 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by cutting myself until I bled, just like I promised I wouldn't.
Promised friends and family who care for me deeply that I'd stop. Guess not.
[deleted]: I hate these posts. They all remind me of this chick i used to be friends with that would cut herself because LIFE IS JUST SO FUCKING HARD! No, I kne... | 5 | 0.6 | |
1369373391 | 1369374553 | null | t5_2to41 | 60 | Rebarbative_Sycophan: TIFU, I fucking zipped my dick, and now it's bleeding.
I was drinking, celebrating the wings game, and the wings win tonight.
Went and took a piss, and zipped the tip of my fucking dick in my pants. It hurts like a bitch, don't do this. I can't wear pants/underwear, or it hurts way too much. It's... | 6 | 10 | |
1369355949 | 1369414343 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | eMaddeningCrowd: TIFU by attending a muay thai class just 24 hours after recovering from a case of minor food poisoning
I'm still new to Muay Thai and only just getting back into working out after two years of lazing around.
Over the Victoria Day long weekend, I ate a LOT of food, some of it questionable. Much of i... | 6 | 5.5 | |
1369379529 | 1369559097 | null | t5_2to41 | 37 | [deleted]: TIFU by lying to my boss.
I had an 8 hour shift planned for Saturday but decided I would call in with an excuse as I was going skateboarding a few hours away at a brand new skatepark. Very keen and I felt like I deserved a Saturday of after a week of exams. Now to get rid of a shift you need a decent excuse ... | 5 | 7.4 | |
1369384018 | 1369409957 | null | t5_2to41 | 1 | flare561: TIFU by throwing away my cigarette.
Today after finishing a lovely smoke break, I went to place my cigarette but in the trash like I always do. The only exception is in this instance I forgot to put it out. I then went inside to play Minecraft. About half an hour later my room mate walks past the window and n... | 3 | 0.333333 | |
1369400912 | 1369488373 | null | t5_2to41 | 2,016 | Saxophobia1275: TIFU by not paying attention to my surroundings
I (a male) was walking across campus at my university past our big clock tower. I hear a girl yelling through a megaphone about her experience with date-rape, and I think "uh oh, there's one of the feminists meetings here". I only say uh-oh because this is... | 13 | 155.076923 | |
1369377304 | 1369412415 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | Emphursis: TIFU by putting on a sock
This happened not five minutes ago. I was getting some socks out of the drawer, and realised that one of them was slightly balled up.
So, as you do, I started flicking it through the air to unball it.
I wasn't paying attention and the ball hit me in the balls.
Ouch.
[deleted]: W... | 3 | 1 | |
1369404051 | 1369552355 | null | t5_2to41 | 37 | JonnyRingo03: TIFU by not locking the restroom door at work.
Back story Yesterday I didn't eat much . except what I did eat was pretty shitty through the day I had about six glazed donuts two sausage and cheese kolaches and a big plate of mashed potatoes for dinner. So today I was expecting a soft nasty shit. now to cu... | 5 | 7.4 |
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