start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1371137169 | 1371242662 | null | t5_2to41 | 24 | leoclancy: TIFU By trying to drink away a problem
My first ever post on Reddit, be kind. So I was at my,then, girlfriends friends birthday party. There were around 12 17-19 year olds at this party, with the ratio being 5 girls to 7 guys, my then girlfriend and i included. My girlfriend at the time had a tendency to fli... | 5 | 4.8 | |
1371133704 | 1371250406 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | ilikebigdots: TIFU by passing out on the sidewalk
My friends and I decided to grab a few drinks (not beers but mixed tequilas and shit) it was pretty chill at first but after a few hours I said fuck it let's get wasted so we drank from one bar to another until we pretty much got carried away and I blacked out.
The mo... | 4 | 4.75 | |
1371151345 | 1371206238 | null | t5_2to41 | 77 | Ru93: TIFU by flashing my bum to my boyfriend's sisters, mum and her boyfriend.
So we went for dinner with his family for his little sister's 6th birthday. Everything went well, when we were done they went back to their car and my boyfriend and I left by foot.
But when they watched us walk away they kept calling his n... | 4 | 19.25 | |
1371153321 | 1371165429 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | demonkleener: TIFU by being banned from r/gameofthrones
A pic was posted of someone meeting "Sansa" at their job. I commented "You should have raped her whilst shouting the Hound can't save you now!. It was only a joke and there were many other rude and perverted comments as well. I just cannot believe I was banned for... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1371168935 | 1371345494 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | GreatestOfAllTime96: TIFU by going to the dentist
Ok so I didnt fuck up by going to the dentist. I'm glad I did. But I fucked up because over the past 5 years my old dentist said my teeth were fine and I just needed to brush and floss regularly. I'll admit I didn't floss nearly enough (like none at all), but every chec... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1371172405 | 1371220643 | null | t5_2to41 | 777 | cbjaycee: TIFU At Work - Multitasking and Reddit do not work well together. I'm probably fired.
I sometimes work from home, and today was one of them.
Needless to say, I am on Reddit and Facebook, while making calls. In our work chat room (only for employees, no customers), a question was asked, which I knew the an... | 7 | 111 | |
1371176361 | 1371180615 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | aquaticdiablo8: Awkward question
canipaybycheck: Hey, would you mind reposting this with "TIFU" at the start of the title? Thanks, and let me know if you run into any problems.
aquaticdiablo8: alright
| 3 | 1 | |
1371176512 | 1371191273 | null | t5_2to41 | 230 | ColonelJustice: TIFU by texting and pooping
I was at work today when I got the urge to purge. I made my way to the guys bathroom which has about 5-6 stalls in it, all but one of which were occupied. I, needing to poop, took the open one. I was getting through my time quite peacefully when I decided to check my texts wh... | 4 | 57.5 | |
1371178723 | 1371181589 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by going to say goodbye to my Mamaw, who is living with a part of our family that stole more than 10,000 dollars from us..
Today I fucked up by letting my Mamaw leave a perfectly good hospital, and stay with drugged up people who can barely keep their eyes open
**Names have been changed to protect the ... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1371178658 | 1371305975 | null | t5_2to41 | 683 | spiderbrey13: TIFU by eating 2 whole pizzas by myself.
I can't even move. I feel like my stomach is about to explode. It felt so right at first.....but it was so wrong.
elfa82: How big were the pizzas? I've seen mini pizzas that were like Ø6" and ones that are upwards of Ø24". This makes a big difference.
spiderbrey... | 12 | 56.916667 | |
1371178553 | 1371226261 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | bagelpusher: TIFU by shaving my legs
So for a while now I've been wanting to get into some different things now that I'm single. *cough crossdressing cough* I decided I would learn how to properly shave my legs. I thought ahead and did a little test area to see how my skin reacted, and then when I noticed some irritati... | 9 | 5.555556 | |
1371180679 | 1371240898 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | aquaticdiablo8: "TIFU" Awkward Question
So there is this rich and spoiled girl in my math class that sits next to me who just seems to get whatever she wants. She seems to think she is better than everybody else. Everytime I acccidentally bump into her or hit something off of her desk and I say I'm sorry, she always sa... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1371189528 | 1371206591 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | ilikeyoualatte: TIFU by Using Scissors
I recently got a new GPS (handheld) and decided to open it today. It was in a cardboard package, but it had that awful plastic packaging around it (directly underneath the cardboard). I decided to use my trusty scissors to cut the plastic. I was making good progress but noticed th... | 3 | 7.333333 | |
1371218289 | 1371240748 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,359 | fuckityfuckfuckfuck_: TIFU by cheating
God fucking dammit. So I cheated super hard on my chem final exam (got the answers before the test), and proceeded to get a B (aka not failing the class). I was super fucking happy I hadn't failed.
My buddy knew I had it and asked if he could have it after I used it. I didn't car... | 12 | 113.25 | |
1371221792 | 1371269172 | null | t5_2to41 | 105 | ozthegreatnpowerful: TIFU by trying to get off, but lost 2 benwahballs in my butt
Now before I start I know that benwahballs aren’t meant for your ass but I thought “Hell let’s try this. Lots of people stick things in places that shouldn’t be there, why not me too”… Bad idea!!
I went to get my little pocket rocket vi... | 6 | 17.5 | |
1371223588 | 1371225098 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | ineedtopoop89: tifu by accidentally submitting a friend request I hadn't talked to in years.
I know it's relatively minor, but tifu by accidentally clicking add friend while I was stalking one of my ex's Facebook page. We had a bad falling out.
dobtoronto: Hey, that isn't so bad. It certainly doesn't affect your life ... | 4 | 1 | |
1371225034 | 1371233072 | null | t5_2to41 | 15 | rubenpol42: TIFU fuck up of the year
Well it wasn't me,it was my friend whose name is coincidently Tyrone.Well Tyrone really fucked up this time. As we walked in to art class, noticing that our teacher wasn't there he yells,
"YES HE'S NOT HERE, WOOH!"
Jumping up and down with joy. Little did Tyrone know, our teacher ... | 3 | 5 | |
1371233656 | 1371235859 | null | t5_2to41 | 1 | Kodenhobold: TIFU denoucing my teacher before my final graduation exams
So I thought I share this story with you, because *sharing is caring* and it amused so much people over the time and I thought maybe some of you might be amused too.
And yeah, if you thought it's not a real TIFU, more likely a **"some years ago IF... | 4 | 0.25 | |
1371236722 | 1371246260 | null | t5_2to41 | -2 | [deleted]: TIFU By introducing my girlfriend to my parents by the wrong name
Well, it was the first time introducing my GF to my parents. I picked her up from her house and we went to my house to meet up with my parents for dinner. When I walked up to the door, her around my arm, I introduced her as "Mariah." Well, sin... | 3 | -0.666667 | |
1371246118 | 1371310087 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,640 | Alexi_Strife: TIFU by quoting Arrested Development
So I thought I lived in a house of like minded people who all enjoyed the same shows, in jokes, etc. Well, turns out I was wrong.
I brought home some hot and sour soup a few days ago from the take out place down the road and put it in our fridge. Mind you it was in a... | 12 | 136.666667 | |
1371258005 | 1371263912 | null | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: TIFU by visiting /r/atheism
The overzealous children in comments overwhelmed me in minutes.
Karmakerosene: I don't know why r/atheism gets such a bad rap. It's not that terrible. I visit it every once and a while because some of the stories are interesting. The only thing I find sickening about it is the me... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1371272460 | 1371275721 | null | t5_2to41 | 1 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting in the wrong car.
I was meeting a friend (I'll call her Jenny) in a grocery store parking lot to go to a concert together. I saw who I thought was her pulling into the parking lot and I got out of my dad's truck and told him to go on home. Now let me start by saying, she looked exactly like J... | 3 | 0.333333 | |
1371311498 | 1371352884 | t3_1gec1f | t5_2to41 | 339 | f40ph125: I came prepared. Literally.
[deleted]: did you mean 8pm and 730am because I am confused
f40ph125: No i watched the video/fapped at 7:30am that morning, then at 8pm that night went downstairs.
[deleted]: ^^^/s
A7XGlock: Your username... I hate it.
[deleted]: If it makes you feel better, I had no idea what Lo... | 10 | 33.9 | |
1371303808 | 1371455000 | null | t5_2to41 | 80 | bjackman: TIFU by microwaving my mum's Sharpie.
I'm staying at my mum's for the summer. She's moving house. She had a viewing this morning, which means you have to put absolutely everything away and have the house spotless. My mum hid loads of stuff in the microwave because fuck cupboards, right? Later I decided to mic... | 6 | 13.333333 | |
1371302604 | 1371316710 | null | t5_2to41 | 93 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to recycle a newspaper
So in Sydney we have these free newspapers for distribution on the train networks that you read on your journey home. These are only usually handed out at major stations, and mostly the CBD at that. Now there's an unwritten law that if you're done with it you can leave i... | 4 | 23.25 | |
1371310942 | 1371733541 | null | t5_2to41 | 915 | turdphone: TIFU. By crapping on my new Samsung Galaxy S4
Throw away due to odd hobby. So the only thing I use the recorder feature on my phones for is to catalouge my farts. Today while lying in bed, naked I could feel a big one coming. So to get maximum recording quality I hit record on the phone arched my back to lif... | 7 | 130.714286 | |
1371312655 | 1371342840 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | Dollaz: TIFU by smoking weed
So I get up this morning hungover as shit. I'm pretty sure no one is awake so I put on a t-shirt and proceed to load the bong and get some fluids in me. Now my stomach was already feeling a little funny but I was thinking I would be fine in a few minutes. So I take a nice big rip off the bo... | 5 | 10 | |
1371275594 | 1371404187 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by recording a 35 GB video.
I just recently bought Project: Eden off of gog.com after hearing replies to a comment I made on a YouTube video. After I got the game downloaded, I decided to make a video for my "Bringing Back the Classics" series. Note: This is my first real video. I tweaked out the settin... | 5 | 1.4 | |
1371324039 | 1371326299 | null | t5_2to41 | 59 | Soccadude123: TIFU by: jogging in the park with a scumbag anus
So at the time (this happened like in 2008) I worked for a small family owned pizza restaurant. Well one night I was working with the owners son and we decided to go for a jog in the park the next morning. Fast forwarded to the next morning. It's a beautifu... | 3 | 19.666667 | |
1371326740 | 1371335662 | null | t5_2to41 | 27 | [deleted]: TIFU by ordering my first vibrator
So I'm a teenage girl, and being the hormonal teenage girl I am, I decided to order my first vibrator on eBay. Well. That didn't go turn out so well, because post from China can be very sporadic and random. And so then it turns out that the package for the vibrator arrives ... | 3 | 9 | |
1371327187 | 1371349062 | null | t5_2to41 | 99 | mangopie101: Tifu by basically handing my dad my porn
Alright so the night before I was gracefully fapping late at night to a nice pov video of an attractive blondes ass bouncing up and down using my video player app. After I was finished I immediatly fell asleep, when I woke up I closed the page and my dad drove me to... | 8 | 12.375 | |
1371321747 | 1371333791 | null | t5_2to41 | 59 | ShitHisDamnPants: TIFU by trying to force out a fart (Continued)
http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/1g8hej/tifu_by_trying_to_force_out_a_fart/
So, a day after I threw my shit-stained boxers into the recycling bin, there was a terrible storm. With the wind slinging recycling and garbage bins around outside, I knew I... | 3 | 19.666667 | |
1371331417 | 1371366042 | null | t5_2to41 | 211 | [deleted]: Tifu by leaving my webcam on
This didn't happen today, but rather, today is the first time that I noticed it.
About a year ago, I bought a new laptop, which has 1 tb of ~~memory~~ disk space and is the shit if I do say so myself.
One the amazing features it came with was a webcam that could record in 1080... | 5 | 42.2 | |
1371333356 | 1371353584 | null | t5_2to41 | 37 | snugglepea: TIFU by getting a spray tan
I took after the Italian side, even if I am a little lighter-skinned... but I wasn't happy with my coloring. I just wanted a nice summer "glow" without the side of skin cancer.
I've been experimenting with some foam self tanner and all is good, but I want a more economical way ... | 3 | 12.333333 | |
1371313094 | 1371425586 | null | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by driving my moped on a dirt road.
Well. First of all I'll have to tell you a few things:
1. I didn't shit myself
2. I drive very carefully
3. Here in Finland you can get a moped driver's license at the age of 15.
4. I didn't FU bad, but still thought I could post it here...
5. This actually happened ... | 4 | 3.5 | |
1371338556 | 1371372066 | null | t5_2to41 | 206 | solipsistic_gnu: TIFU by leaving LSD in my fridge
For the past few weeks, I have had my apartment to myself. my roommates have gone home for the summer (we are in college). Well, I recently acquired some LSD on blotter paper that I was planning on ingesting sometime in the next week. This isn't something that I norm... | 12 | 17.166667 | |
1371340715 | 1373132586 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | wikisaiyan: TIFU by attempting to swim... with out knowing how to swim....
...and breathing in a sh*t-ton of water and burning the crap out of my brain.
ErasmusDarwin: Make sure you get checked out by a doctor ASAP. A near drowning incident can cause damage that leads to death later.
wikisaiyan: yeah Ive learned that ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1371345770 | 1371410703 | null | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU I took a dump and dropped my phone into the toilet, destroying and crappifying my phone.
lord_darrel_the_MEH: Put it in rice?
Angrypirate54: I did! However no results came back negative. The phone is dead.
lord_darrel_the_MEH: Shitty, man. Put it in the microwave? For experimental purposes? Post resul... | 6 | 2.5 | |
1371348106 | 1371424487 | null | t5_2to41 | 113 | trajectorys: TIFU by wanting a pepperminty bath.
Today I was going to have a bath after a long day of painting kids faces at a carnival. All would go well, except being the genius I am, I put in some epsom salts (I always do for my bath), and I grabbed my bottle of peppermint essential oil.
Lately, I've been on a diy... | 4 | 28.25 | |
1371353047 | 1371366514 | null | t5_2to41 | 48 | [deleted]: TIFU by fapping
I was home alone while my mom was at work. It was 2:30 and my mom didn't get off until 4. I thought it'd be a good time to just go for it, so I did. I was watching a porn video that I had downloaded to my ipad while using my parents sex toy to maximize the experience. Little did I know my mom... | 4 | 12 | |
1371355174 | 1371356355 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | JordansOnMyFeet: TIFU by pushing the wrong button.
The other day me and my brother were playing Black Ops 2 and he had the mic and a girl came into the lobby we were in. He and her started talking while we were playing. They became friends on xbox and facebook. A few days later I told her who i was and sent her a frien... | 6 | 1.333333 | |
1371360423 | 1371600643 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | FoxtrotZero: TIFU by taking off my shirt
Alright, Reddit. Gather round and hear of my shame.
First, you must know, that I am white. Very white. Fucking blindingly white. I can handle sun - even have a tan - in places that are usually exposed (e.g., my forearms), but not in others.
Like my back and shoulders.
Well, I... | 5 | 7 | |
1371366072 | 1371367506 | null | t5_2to41 | 29 | SEGnosis: TIFU by giving money to a "homeless" man
I was in line at KFC and he was counting pennies in his hand in front of me. He turned around and said if I could spare some money for his lunch since he recently became homeless. The situation seemed genuine so I gave him $10.
Right after he said bless you and walked... | 4 | 7.25 | |
1371359944 | 1371379925 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by breaking a plate
I woke up late this morning, home alone with only a few minutes to get ready for work, so I rushed around the house eating and getting dressed. As I rushed towards the front door performing the compulsory morning reddit check my phone slipped out of my hands and I watched with dread... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1371367478 | 1371409660 | null | t5_2to41 | 862 | PurpleTrainRide: TIFU by eating stale skittles
So it's 2:17 in the morning and I'm playing some COD, yep no life. So I see a pack of sour skittles across the room. Craving that shit I venture over to grab some. Noticing they don't display the new Green Apple flavor
on the package I realize these things are old. I am... | 9 | 95.777778 | |
1371379761 | 1371415182 | null | t5_2to41 | 75 | jesusofseks: TIFU: I was deveeted...
So I had the brilliant idea to use Veet hair removal gel as the ol' danglies were in need of a trim and I had heard that Veet leaves them smoother for longer. Well I guess thats right when the skin has to grow back first.
Pre-Story: I tried this before and the results were great b... | 4 | 18.75 | |
1371389191 | 1371449594 | null | t5_2to41 | 76 | [deleted]: TIFU by ejaculating all over my face
So everyone's gone away on holiday whilst I have exams and I have the whole house to myself. I did a bit of studying and got bored so I went downstairs. Shit happened I saw some tits on TV and I ended up really fucking horny.
Seeing as nobody was home I could watch porn... | 16 | 4.75 | |
1371391332 | 1371438635 | null | t5_2to41 | 30 | foreverwindblown: TIFU by telling my Dad that I love him.
It was last October, but I'm feeling the fall-out from it the most today.
After my mom died from cancer last year, I started looking for my estranged father. I had only known him for a short time when I was 6 and barely remembered more than his name. I neve... | 4 | 7.5 | |
1371402643 | 1371458333 | null | t5_2to41 | 893 | snicklefritz81: TIFU by breaking off 3/4 of a someone's manhood.
Technically not me but seeing as my mom does not reddit I decided I'd share one of my favorite stories that I've heard from her.
Back when she was still in school to become a nurse practitioner she was seeing a patient; however, this man was special beca... | 9 | 99.222222 | |
1371411313 | 1371439431 | null | t5_2to41 | 56 | GJPD: TIFU: By having the girl I like clean my puke
So my friends and I went to a party I drank a heap, mixed booze.
I proceed to vomit, a lot, not into the toilet but onto the floor. Being the good guy that I am I try to clean some of it up but my only lift home was leaving and everyone told me it was fine to just go.... | 5 | 11.2 | |
1371410211 | 1371430028 | null | t5_2to41 | 21 | guruchild: TIFU by drinking a beer
I tend to leave half-drank beers in my garage. Usually no more than a day old, often I'll end up finishing them off the next day. Last night there was a millipede outbreak. Little buggers were everywhere, including my beer when I drank it today. Burned my mouth, firehosing it all over... | 4 | 5.25 | |
1371412309 | 1371471414 | null | t5_2to41 | 150 | gh0stfl0wers: TIFU by gender-stereotyping
This actually happened a couple of years ago. I grew up in Germany where I went to a German secondary school that went from 5th to 13th grade (we still had 13 grades then, they have since changed that). My school was named after Anne Frank and we had a club that I was very acti... | 6 | 25 | |
1371426179 | 1371440700 | null | t5_2to41 | 82 | zecheeseking: TIFU by forgetting to pull my underwear down before I pooped.
I was on Skype on my tablet as I went to the toilet IMing a friend. I don't multitask very well, so I forgot one of the most important things to do before pooping. I think the best part was when I realised and told my mate who just freaked out ... | 3 | 27.333333 | |
1371428511 | 1371477834 | null | t5_2to41 | 151 | TheNearedge: TIFU by riding on the back of my friend's E-bike
This was actually yesterday but I was in hospital for much of the afternoon, so here you go:
My friend and I are both English teachers in a small (relatively) in China. Neither of us speak particularly good Chinese. Just a bit of context.
So yesterday afte... | 8 | 18.875 | |
1371435629 | 1371494608 | null | t5_2to41 | 612 | [deleted]: TIFU by touching an electric wire in a lion enclosure at the zoo
The other day I was dragged to the zoo by my family. I really don't care for the zoo but went anyway. I brought my cousin with me,who is around the same age as me, in hope that his company would bring a little more excitement to this so called ... | 5 | 122.4 | |
1371433663 | 1371494165 | null | t5_2to41 | 104 | BuzzsGirlfriendWoof: TIFU by not securing items on a boat
Today my friends and I started the day out by wakeboarding in the morning. We finished the day early so that we could get back and start prepping dinner for father's day, we load up the campsite in the truck and all the ski gear into the boat. On the long stre... | 4 | 26 | |
1371459872 | 1371579365 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | billieandted: TIFU by drinking coffee
So I react poorly to coffee. I'm not entirely sure why, but I do. Depending on the day, that reaction will range somewhere on the spectrum between fairly harmless to my very own circle of hell. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to figure out why exactly my level of coffee related ... | 4 | 3 | |
1371460665 | 1371477040 | null | t5_2to41 | 39 | [deleted]: TIFU by putting wax strips on my face.
**TL; DR I used wax to get rid of peeling skin and pulled off my eyebrow instead.**
To start this story off I have insomnia and very dark eyebrows in comparison to the rest of my features. The things I come up with to entertain myself when it's four am and I'm awake g... | 3 | 13 | |
1371468707 | 1371572598 | null | t5_2to41 | 129 | BumbleBadger: TIFU by fainting during an exam
I was about halfway done with my oral exam when my eyes rolled to the back of my head, and my face slammed against the floor. I was out cold for almost 10 seconds, when I woke up with the examiners shaking me and shouting.
A few minutes of mutual panicking went by before ... | 5 | 25.8 | |
1371476161 | 1371497058 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | ktkoolkat: i sucked the wrong dick
a few months ago my best friend's, sister's ex-boyfriend kept running into me at the grocery store. we've known each other for awhile because we're always hanging out since my best friend, and her sister, and i are all friends. the ex-boyfriend told me that him and the sister were no ... | 3 | 1 | |
1371443202 | 1371477512 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | yab-yum: TIFU by wiping wiping myself with an ant covered rag
Living in a tropical climate can be a lot of fun at times, but the heat really gets to you. My roommate left for the weekend so after a shower I decided it was a great opportunity to go clothes less and enjoy the breeze of a fan on my nether regions.
One thi... | 3 | 6.333333 | |
1371471893 | 1371498957 | null | t5_2to41 | 336 | [deleted]: TIFU by crushing a can of spray paint next to my face (pic in comments)
Yep. At work I was told to bring a jack hammer to the truck. The jack hammer is heavy. I put it right down on a can of black spray paint which caused the can to be crushed and explode. Luckily I closed my eyes in time and I'm alright. Ho... | 5 | 67.2 | |
1371478130 | 1371486470 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | Emartyr: TIFU by not realizing that there was not a doorknob before I closed the door
Tifu… by not realizing that there was not a doorknob before I closed the door to take a shower. I ended up finishing my shower and putting on my boxers and shirt on. I am on my way out and I realize the door is closed and it has no d... | 3 | 4 | |
1371450623 | 1371489370 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by using expired eye drops.
Ow.
Looked at the expiration date after a few minutes of pain.
Blue_Footed_Booby: I put ear drops in my eyes once
MountainPercussion: I put nose drops on my eye once.
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1371478405 | 1372097392 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,013 | urbanbourban: TIFU by vomiting all over my best friend's brand new car.
This dude has been my best friend for 13 years. He is a music major at a very pristine school, known for it's incredible music program, and he is the best musician I know. He recently got a 2012 Subaru Impreza, and he has has it for less than a wee... | 8 | 126.625 | |
1371485581 | 1371499856 | null | t5_2to41 | 85 | premedfuckup: TIFU by not studying for MCATs
Throwaway, because I am so ashamed. Anyway.
Awhile back, I signed up for an online "on demand" MCAT course. It was expensive ($1700!) but useful because I could study on my own time. I was slowly plodding through the material because I had other schoolwork, and I figured, ... | 4 | 21.25 | |
1371497095 | 1371498593 | null | t5_2to41 | -1 | TheAlecsander56: TIFU When my Gf's Kitten bit my dick
So, my girlfriend's kitten was so freaking annoying. It meowed to the point that it kept me and her up, and I'm a heavy sleeper. Anyways, this was about 3 in the morning on a Monday and i had to get up at 5. The kitten had kept me up until about midnight. So as i... | 4 | -0.25 | |
1371500133 | 1371971627 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | Perception_The_Night: TIFU by falling in love with my best friend.
I only wish I deserved to have a romantic involvement with her. If I did I might try to purse such a thing.
HydrofoilGoat: I've had a similar thing happen to me, and I pursued it a few years ago. Looking back I probably could have done it a lot better ... | 4 | 1 | |
1371509525 | 1371576461 | null | t5_2to41 | 559 | [deleted]: TIFU and wrecked my car because I watched a cow pee
Today I wanted to avoid traffic and took the back roads home. Admiring this scenic route I rarely take, I catch glimpse of a lewd heifer, all peeing out in the open. Udderly shocked by it's lack of prudishness, and mesmerized by such a continuous stream... ... | 9 | 62.111111 | |
1371508887 | 1371839657 | null | t5_2to41 | 19 | mintlydisturbed: TIFU by parking in a handicap space.
This is actually my mom's fuck up, but since she doesn't reddit, I asked her permission to write this here.
She went into town to get some Chinese takeout for dinner, and the parking lot was completely full. Well, all except for a handicapped spot. She weighs the o... | 5 | 3.8 | |
1371495557 | 1371524488 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | pepperminteapatty: TIFU by pooping at work.
Read a lifehack on reddit before about pooping at work, and so once I started my shiny new office job I proceeded to try it out. It soon became a shameful habit that I'm trying hard to get rid of.
Fast forward to today, after doing the buttclench as I waited for my superviso... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1371522517 | 1371650633 | null | t5_2to41 | 73 | kervin2112: Tifu by narrowly avoiding shiting myself... And wiping my ass with poison ivy instead.
Alright. So I went out today with a girl I've been seeing the past few years for a photo shoot- she's a model and I had never seen her work before. I was pretty excited. I took her out for a burger and everything went gre... | 5 | 14.6 | |
1371521481 | 1371525564 | null | t5_2to41 | 20 | kendroeger: TIFU by always running away from my problems
So a bit of background. I went to college for a year, the first semester was absolutely horrible. I hated it there and developed severe depression. I was convinced that I could do better my second semester, but if I didn't I knew there would be consequences.
I ... | 5 | 4 | |
1371524962 | 1371615141 | null | t5_2to41 | 28 | dnld: TIFU by accidentally squashing a coworker's boob.
We were moving furniture into an office and the back of my hand pressed against her breast squashing it good then the door slammed shut. I apologized, she said nothing and left the room. I just made a workplace friendship that much more awkward.
KrogerKing: It's... | 6 | 4.666667 | |
1371527139 | 1371580751 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | Michael_J-Caboose: TIFU by cutting 75% though my pinkie
I fucked up not today but awhile ago last month to be exact, anyways I was cutting wood with a chop saw, the piece was to long so I being stupid tried to support by putting my finger in a odd position and cut the board which proceeds to kick and throw my finger in... | 5 | 4.6 | |
1371559444 | 1371588327 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | MrFace1: TIFU by not going to the bathroom before my morning run
I clearly wasn't thinking this morning when I was preparing for my morning run. Usually I go to the bathroom before every run to ensure no...surprises creep up on my in the middle of the run. Well today I apparently decided it would be a fantastic idea to... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1371536595 | 1371588535 | null | t5_2to41 | 13 | Dillinjer882: TIFU by stepping in puppy shit...BAREFOOT. Innocent mistake?...
So we just got a new puppy, a rat terrier that we love to death despite all his late night yapping. He's getting adjusted very well, but we sometimes haven't gotten him out to the grass to shit soon enough. Now here's why it's an innocent mis... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1371570572 | 1371667608 | null | t5_2to41 | 40 | [deleted]: TIFU by comparing cancer to picky eating.
A little bit of background info: When my girlfriend was 11 years old she was diagnosed with melanoma- the most dangerous form of skin cancer. She beat the cancer and is now a beautiful, blonde, fair-skinned 20 year old. Unfortunately she can't be out in the sun for v... | 5 | 8 | |
1371571885 | 1371573782 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU by driving while suspended and having my plate ran
Today while doing a coffee run for work, I got pulled over. I was not speeding, I was doing everything legal except for being unlicensed. My license was suspended in May, unbeknownst to me, and I went to get my motorcycle license 7 days ago and went thr... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1371573214 | 1371577673 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidently pepper spraying myself and pouring rotten milk in my eyes
This was yesterday but due to being a little blurry eyes i couldnt write .The day started with me at my friends house and ended with me going home at night. Before i continue, my mom is terrified of frogs, absolutely hates them. Wh... | 4 | 12.5 | |
1371575075 | 1378731934 | null | t5_2to41 | 892 | [deleted]: TIFU by falling off a roof onto a moose and attacked by a baby deer in the same day
This wasn't actually today but I was thinking about all my fuck ups through out my life and I thought you guys would enjoy this story. I was doing some work for a lady who helped baby animals get back into the wild after they... | 7 | 127.428571 | |
1371579576 | 1372706312 | null | t5_2to41 | 52 | pimpwhopees: TIFU when ordering at Moe's, I asked for a Joey Bag O' Dicks, instead of a Joey Bag O' Donuts.
By God that burrito was superb though, the rest of the walk to the register however was quite awkard.
NightHawk877: Great. You made me shoot everclear and fruit punch out my nose. This really hurts.
SneerfulWizar... | 4 | 13 | |
1371586329 | 1371614955 | null | t5_2to41 | 162 | Entalt11234: TIFU by using cheesy pickup lines on an elementary school teacher.
Today was my little brothers elementary school graduation. Part of the graduation was that the parents can go roam the school and take pictures with their children and their classmates. So I ended up walking around, and being the hormone ri... | 5 | 32.4 | |
1371587560 | 1371606514 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | chuckychub: TIFU by cleaning my hamster's cage
I have a hamster, and her name is Cocoa. My brother and I got her and another hamster named Oreo last week, as a present for our doing good in our final exams and classes. I have had a hamster before, but I was maybe 8 years old and couldn't take care of him well. We ended... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1371592986 | 1371853020 | null | t5_2to41 | -39 | throwaway_shitpoo: TIFU by leaving my butt toys under my mattress
I am a straight male. I enjoy anal play. I have a plastic bag with two (rather large) toys and two containers of lube. I put this under my mattress and today my grandpa and I were putting carpet in my room. We move the bed and I realize my mistake right ... | 23 | -1.695652 | |
1371598171 | 1371645501 | null | t5_2to41 | -9 | [deleted]: TIFU by making fun of a girl.
So I was talking to this girl and I'm a guy and our conversation went something like this:
Girl: "Ha, ha your'e so flattering Life-Is-Sudy"
Me: "Ha! The only thing flat around here is your chest."
Girl: =( "I'm never talking to you again"
I'm know so stupid for saying that a... | 4 | -2.25 | |
1371604860 | 1371645555 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | SkyrimNerd117: TIFU by shouting Lydia off of High Hrothgar
JustLetMeComment: She's useless anyway.
Identify_the_feel: Not if you have the animated prostitution and CBBE mod.
SneerfulWizard: Way?
Identify_the_feel: WAY.
| 5 | 1.8 | |
1371605562 | 1371783068 | null | t5_2to41 | 135 | [deleted]: TIFU by agreeing with my GF when she said she was getting fat
TIFU by agreeing with my GF when she said she was getting fat and ended up have to hug her for a few minutes after she started crying standing in front of the food pantry holding a box of cheese its. I had to take them out of her had and couldn't ... | 6 | 22.5 | |
1371607629 | 1371657069 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | DollaBillMontgomery: TIFU by roadkilling a turtle
I was out driving with a friend this evening and we were out on a quiet country (ish) road. I was going 60 or 70 and I came over a hill. I saw what almost looked like a cat but a split second later knew it was a turtle of some sort. Thing was way too close for me to try... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1371608786 | 1371650937 | null | t5_2to41 | 151 | ButthurtWhiteGirl: TIFU by twerking
So I was having a really fun night, drunk and goofy with my friends. At some point a few of us decided to try twerking. I was doing a really kickass job for a first-timer... until I backed up without looking, and took a sharp counter edge in my butt/vag area. Everyone did a big sympa... | 6 | 25.166667 | |
1371614131 | 1371667805 | null | t5_2to41 | 55 | Throwaway_account134: TIFU by trusting a fart when I've been having diarrhea all day.
That trust was misplaced.
Pointy130: Reset the "Shit self" timer again.
its_not_funny: Does the timer ever get a chance to move off of zero?
taking214: it hit two, yesterday.
| 4 | 13.75 | |
1371617537 | 1371651240 | null | t5_2to41 | 81 | [deleted]: TIFU by letting a girl with a tongue piercing give me a blow job, now there is a cut on my dick
I got a text from a super slutty girl I know, saying, "How's it going?". I jokingly replied, "Good, just super horny." She said, "If you can drive over I can take care of that." Then I proceeded to drive over to h... | 5 | 16.2 | |
1371617698 | 1371711313 | null | t5_2to41 | 53 | garbledcatlake3000: Today I fucked up by giving residents at a nursing home nacho cheese sauce instead of actual soup.
I gave two residents cups (coffee cups) of nacho cheese sauce (hot), instead of cream of potato soup. I didn't realize what had happened until after they had left the cafe, and I was dipping up a bowl ... | 3 | 17.666667 | |
1371621454 | 1371650180 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | RainBubble: TIFU by not paying attention to what I was eating
Actually yesterday I fucked up, but now I am finally being punished. I know that this story is fairly typical, but this is my first rodeo with food poisoning and unfortunately it's all my fault.
I had just gotten off a 9 hour shift and I was famished. I kne... | 5 | 1.4 | |
1371652747 | 1371768471 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,151 | Stuck_in_the_VCR: TIFU by microwaving cat food.
I read an artificial about how cats like their food warm as though it were freshly killed so I thought "Hmm, I'll microwave my kitty's wet cat food and she'll enjoy it 10 times more!" Worst idea I've ever had. It was the worst smell ever. It filled the entire house up wit... | 10 | 115.1 | |
1371656603 | 1372747963 | null | t5_2to41 | 81 | [deleted]: TIFU and ate a dingle berry.
so I was down in my shed working on some art work after a while I tend to get hungry and will come up to my house and raid the pantry and fridge. so I got some chips, a sparkling cherry soda, some cookies and a bag of chocolate chips. after re checking the fridge two times I was ... | 4 | 20.25 | |
1371656818 | 1371826836 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | MQRedditor: TIFU
Well this didn't happen today it was a month or so a go but I didn't think of posting it so here it is
So we were having a sleepover at my uncle house the "cool" kind of one and it was me and some other cousins just chilling out till late at night watching movies like always and then I got tired. Sinc... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1371647617 | 1371683101 | null | t5_2to41 | 12 | okan931: TIFU spilling my cola on my computer desk and than the damn curtain falls on my head
I was going upstairs with a glass of coke and i put it on my desk so i could start up the computer, i frickken knocked the damn thing all over my desk with my elbow! I went to the bathroom to get a bucket of water and a towel ... | 4 | 3 | |
1371673094 | 1371682095 | null | t5_2to41 | 11 | sonicx2218: TIFU by believing CommonApp
Applied for transfer to my top choice of college. Did all the visible steps and paid money, which then brought me to a confirmation page that I had completed everything. There were no options left, just the Completed text. So weeks pass and I get accepted to all the colleges BUT ... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1371690994 | 1371741809 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU: by being a belligerent drunk wench and embarrassed myself.
The chaos began when my friend drops me home from a night of drinking. I'm completely inebriated at this point, and called my ex. Lets call him Tom. We had already argued beforehand and he turned his phone off to avoid talking to me. This creat... | 4 | 2.25 |
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