start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1338688948 | 1338761621 | t3_ui0er | t5_2to41 | 69 | fawkesmulder: TIFU by attempting to drink 79 cents
I got about 20 minutes of sleep last night. I had to commute 2 hours for work in the early morning and 2 hours back. On the drive back home, I was deathly tired. I started falling asleep at the wheel, so I got off the freeway, pulled up to a gasoline station, and bough... | 5 | 13.8 | |
1338685742 | 1338726923 | t3_uhy3e | t5_2to41 | 5 | zfriderici: T(W)IFU: Auditions + Dyslexia = Bad time
The long and short of the matter is this: I was given a phone number to call this director at for an audition at a gig this summer...I called multiple times, only for it to go to an unidentified voicemail at the time. The event coordinator emails me today saying the ... | 5 | 1 | |
1338699117 | 1338757621 | t3_ui7pd | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: There goes my self-esteem
Posted a picture online saying that I think im beautiful in my own way and that im happy with how I and my life have turned out. First comment I got was that I was ugly and had a terrible personality. Never should have posted the picture. -_-
emo_kakyo: I didn't think so
:D
Xonix12... | 4 | 1 | |
1338703310 | 1338704366 | t3_uiabr | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU: I was too drunk to spend my last night with my fellow graduates.
So my high school graduation was this morning, my family threw a party after at our house. The night after graduation, my school has a "grad night," from 7:30-4:30 A.M. I was not looking forward to spending that much time with all of thes... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1338705029 | 1338771176 | t3_uibar | t5_2to41 | 388 | Brisaster: TIFU: Caught sex skyping by grandma...
This happened about an hour ago. The setting is my grandma's house(and she has a disdain for me). I was Skyping this guy and things got a little hot and heavy. I was showing off my lady bits and he was jacking off. The house was quiet and I had assumed she had gone to b... | 8 | 48.5 | |
1338740915 | 1338821893 | t3_uipww | t5_2to41 | 4 | TheAwesomeinator: TIFU: Made a super-insensitive status about a dead kindergartner, riled up a bunch of people.
Our first day of summer, we hear about a kindergartner who had just drowned. Sad, right? So now everyone's depressed about it, and I make a status whining about how everyone's depressed on the first day of s... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1338762040 | 1340756726 | t3_uj62l | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU I got extremely drunk and threw up all over my living room
I am only 16 and my parents are away for the weekend. After thinking, wow this is gonna be great, I figured that I should get some booze and get drunk for the fuck of it. Well I had a little too much to drink and I ended up waking up in a thro... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1338763594 | 1338804856 | t3_uj7f5 | t5_2to41 | 89 | NarcoticNarcosis: TIFU: Lost the master key set at work.
I work as a housekeeper in the tourism/hospitality industry. I'm pretty new at it, and as such I'm not very good, but I've been getting better.
However, today as we were starting work, we discovered the master key set, the one that has keys for all the rooms, wa... | 3 | 29.666667 | |
1338746888 | 1338780506 | t3_uiu1f | t5_2to41 | 16 | gigermunit: TIFU and now have a large scar on my tailbone
I am about 125-130 pounds and my height is I suppose 5 foot 9 or 10.
I wanted to start getting in shape to gain some weight and muscle so I have been recently been working out every other day. My reason for working out was I was sick of being known as the skinny... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1338769711 | 1338869616 | t3_ujcjl | t5_2to41 | 55 | notarapist72: TIFU at an intersection doing 90 km/h
http://i.imgur.com/zpThE.jpg
notarapist72: stereotype woman cant drive, goes thru red light, hits me
Switchitis: So someone hit you? If that is the case, they fucked up, you did not.
notarapist72: Still a fuck up in my mind
Mech1: You should try a V8, you do not have ... | 7 | 7.857143 | |
1338789160 | 1338849652 | t3_ujsx6 | t5_2to41 | 321 | [deleted]: TIFU: Ruined a friend's 21st Birthday Party
So today saw a friend of mine, we'll call him Jay, turn 21. His family had organised a party, renting out a social club, putting on a DJ, food and whatnot. It was a good party until I fucked up big time and was pretty much forced to make a quick exit.
You see, whi... | 10 | 32.1 | |
1338792205 | 1338842838 | t3_ujuqp | t5_2to41 | 35 | Switchitis: TIFU: Took a shot up dish soap.
My friend is visiting from Washington and we headed home to drink and hang out for a while. After getting there we pulled out about 10 bottles of alcohol and decided what to try first. I pour myself a shot of some pink fruity smelling hard alcohol and faced it. I realized on... | 5 | 7 | |
1338813828 | 1338866700 | t3_uk405 | t5_2to41 | 64 | betadan: TIFU: How I broke a bathroom I wasn't using.
The following story did not occur today. However I just found TIFU.
A little insight may help explain how this happened. As far back as I can remember I have never handled humidity very well. Sadly I have never outgrown this.
So here begins my story. It was a humi... | 6 | 10.666667 | |
1338836183 | 1338871589 | t3_ukmtf | t5_2to41 | 167 | MrGoldenVoice: TIFU: How I Got Fired From My First Job
This was about a year ago but I was not a Redditor at the time. So, let's time-travel back one year, shall we? Okay. I worked as a Head Cashier at a local farm goods store. One of the products that the store is really careful of is Glyphosate. What Glyposate is, is... | 14 | 11.928571 | |
1338862007 | 1338867072 | t3_ulchs | t5_2to41 | 161 | canipaybycheck: 15,000!
Hey everyone,
Congratulations on reaching 15,000 subscribers! Despite being 13 weeks old, we are still in the [top thirty hottest subreddits](http://redditlist.com/hot-new). We hope that you'll continue to promote us around reddit whenever you see any fuck-ups that belong on /r/tifu.
This is a... | 7 | 23 | |
1338877332 | 1339137951 | t3_ulpcy | t5_2to41 | 80 | VelvetOnion: TIFU - I left a case of beer on the bus.
I bought a case of 4 Pines Kolsch on my way home from work, put it on the seat next to me.
Then I ran off the bus leaving it behind.
[deleted]: Did you fuck up? Or did you make someone's day that little bit better?
VelvetOnion: Nice way of thinking about it.
FromT... | 8 | 10 | |
1338838404 | 1339011312 | t3_ukp1a | t5_2to41 | 84 | Azethian1989: TIFU: Broke a toilet, Set the house on fire, Jerked off in another girls bed and wiped it on her sheets, knocked down a sign at a grocery store, took a long bus ride back to Connecticut.
I recently found TIFU and decided I would tell the story of the most fucked up occurrences to ever happen to me over th... | 4 | 21 | |
1338912538 | 1358894808 | t3_um8pr | t5_2to41 | 616 | sorepheet: TIFU accidentally gave toll booth 2 nickels sandwiched between 2 quarters. Now I have a court summons over $.40! [X-Post from /r/Maine]
http://www.reddit.com/r/Maine/comments/ulfm5/gave_incorrect_change_at_toll_accidentallthave_an/
The part that really frosts my ass is that my car in under my lady's EZ-Pas... | 11 | 56 | |
1338925154 | 1338936045 | t3_umkor | t5_2to41 | 13 | jebus_cripes: TIFU by getting caught shoplifting after successfully doing it for a year.
I started shoplifting about a year ago because my wages were being garnished and I literally had no money. I'd put a few things in my bag then buy a few other things. Today somehow I got caught, and since it was over $20 they had t... | 5 | 2.6 | |
1338907864 | 1339210881 | t3_um4q8 | t5_2to41 | 9 | br0kenr3crd: TIFU: Went abalone diving, lost my dive bag and gauge...and the abalone I had in my bag.
EDIT: Dove down through some heavy sea grass and kelp. Ran out of air and was struggling to get to the surface, got tangled up in the kelp and finally ripped free only to find out when I got to the surface that my ca... | 4 | 2.25 | |
1338930714 | 1339051224 | t3_umq5l | t5_2to41 | 17 | 11equals7: TIFU: I plugged in my tablet charger and got sparks. Result: fried tablet.
Bluebraid: Wait. What part of this is your fuck-up?
DCMFDOOM: You're supposed to plug your charger into the wall, and then into your device to prevent the unfortunate even of this happening.
11equals7: I learned it the hard and spark... | 5 | 3.4 | |
1338932398 | 1339138695 | t3_umrst | t5_2to41 | 70 | Perf1ction: TIFU: I was texting a girl I liked all day yesterday, I caused her cellphone bill to be > $160
Due to circumstances I have a phone from the US, but I live in Canada (where the girl lives). We started texting and I forgot to warn about the probable long distance charges. We ended up texting all day yeste... | 7 | 10 | |
1338933016 | 1339467864 | t3_umsd1 | t5_2to41 | 14 | bax101: TIFU: Attempted to repair a Skydrol hydraulic pump unit. Ended up with Skydrol all over me.
I was asked to fix our hydraulic mule pump because the tank was cracked at the flange. There was no way PRC could hold up to Skydrol because it is so corrosive. So with out any instructions I put the pump on a forklit a... | 4 | 3.5 | |
1338951670 | 1338983430 | t3_unabb | t5_2to41 | 31 | mcmk3: TIFY by coating myself in sticky semen
sanchezbloodrush: DUDE. I get that fucking goo shit too! Just don't fap in the shower, it seems to be some kind of chemical reaction with water.
CaptO: It's the reaction to the hot water. Fap in a cool shower and it slides right off.
smoothisfast: Pro life tip.
| 4 | 7.75 | |
1338991036 | 1339108348 | t3_unxku | t5_2to41 | 344 | [deleted]: TIFU by drawing a penis
I was sitting next to my friend in English class and I see he has his daily planner on his desk. I pick it up, flip to a random page, and draw (in pencil) a rudimentary penis. I show him and he laughs. He then takes the planner and (with pen) adds details such as hair and shading. It ... | 15 | 22.933333 | |
1339034208 | 1339101614 | t3_up1vy | t5_2to41 | 188 | [deleted]: TIFU
Well since there isn't a subreddit for 5 years ago I fucked up... Starting with the back story, I was working at Books A Million. And anyone that has ever worked there knows that if your shift says you're off at midnight, you're probably going to be there at 3 am still cleaning up books. Well this was o... | 8 | 23.5 | |
1339036835 | 1339042211 | t3_up4d3 | t5_2to41 | 54 | Michi_THE_Awesome: TIFU: I didn't go to work b/c of bad phone habits.
I rarely ever charge my phone and I usually leave it around the house. This results in missed calls and me not checking messages for a week at a time. Those are my bad phone habits.
Work: I've got two part time jobs (in order to still have... | 7 | 7.714286 | |
1339037857 | 1339038941 | t3_up5a7 | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU and used the wrong restroom.
This actually happened about a month ago. I'm waiting outside my next class and I have to pee. Now, at this school every restroom is the same--men's on left, women's on right, back to back. I've used this particular restroom several times before. But for some reason on this ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1339049796 | 1339051791 | t3_upe64 | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling my best friend's crush not to fall for him
This happened two years ago but thought I would share. So my ex-best friend, who lets just say gets angry for almost everything, had a crush on this girl who actually had a huge crush on him first. Anyways all was going good and she told him that she... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1339047459 | 1339292704 | t3_upcrl | t5_2to41 | 20 | strongbadiophage: TIFU by getting caught watching porn.
I was in my little inconspicuous corner of the house where we always put the laptop. No one can see what you are doing but the positioning isn't sinister by any means. Anyways, as my older brother is loading some game or something on the tv, it starts skipping. ... | 7 | 2.857143 | |
1339051956 | 1340093543 | t3_upfge | t5_2to41 | 37 | throawayeaye: TIFU: I changed the amount on a customers check after they left.
Throwaway for obvious reasons, but today at work there was a lady who had came in to buy a few items. We were chatting away about life, when she wrote the check for $56. Well, she saw the total before I added tax, and I didn't notice the am... | 6 | 6.166667 | |
1339066704 | 1339802934 | t3_uplmm | t5_2to41 | 80 | hullokoala: TIFU and was sprayed by a skunk at close range.
I was in front of my house smoking and fiddling with my phone. With smoke time over, I begin my trip to the porch and up the steps, the whole time on auto pilot with my phone in my face. About two feet from the door, I notice a black fuzzy creature that resemb... | 6 | 13.333333 | |
1339075332 | 1339110050 | t3_uppxk | t5_2to41 | 3 | courtneyfightsfoo: TIFU: Looked at ex-boyfriend's reddit account.
He commented on someone's post and said I was dead to him and lied about buying me a cat. I don't know why I looked at it. I knew it would make me upset but I did it anyway.
Brisaster: Why would he lie about buying you a cat? That seems a bit pointless..... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1339069543 | 1339137530 | t3_upmtx | t5_2to41 | 23 | Infernuzz666: TIFU: Got fired from internship
Well, actually this story is from a two years ago, and I thought I'd share it now that I had found out this subreddit.
I was still in high school, where we were obligated to do an internship of 25 hours at a non-profit organisation which were helping people in a way. Me an... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1339075938 | 1339094392 | t3_upqc2 | t5_2to41 | 27 | ipitythefail: TIFU-Left my shoes at the park.
I was hanging out at the park with a bunch of friends, and then we left to go to Waffle House. I forgot that I had left my shoes in the middle of the fucking playground. I went to get them about 30 minutes later and they were gone. Fuck.
FromTheHood: People get beat up and... | 3 | 9 | |
1339076460 | 1339118742 | t3_upqpl | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU: sent a video gore video too some chick.
I had just watched this crazy video of a bear mauling some guy and I wanted to sent it too my friend on Facebook, so after writing something on the lines of "you should watch this" and adding the link at the end I sent it to him. Right after I closed the chat I r... | 3 | 2 | |
1339032112 | 1339093324 | t3_uozzx | t5_2to41 | 3 | emikokitsune: TIFU: Walking into a bathroom without knocking first, my brother-in-law was in there...
I woke up half asleep this morning and went straight to the bathroom because I really had to pee. I figure it's super early (6:50am) and no one is in there. I was staring at my feet the entire time as well (for some re... | 3 | 1 | |
1339084471 | 1339252403 | t3_upx5z | t5_2to41 | 139 | MyNewPants: TIFU and realized I lost all the sources for my 10 page research paper due today.
Really, I have no idea where they went.
Dean999111: Sorry if it's silly of me to think you may not have considered this, but are some of them saved in browsing history?
If not, good luck in finding your sources.
MyNewPants: h... | 11 | 12.636364 | |
1339012222 | 1339094652 | t3_uogoe | t5_2to41 | 7 | frankfurter89: TIFU: I partied with Pat Kane and pissed my bed
More like a few weeks ago I fucked up, but I was at a bar and met Patrick Kane (hockey player). We got super drunk and then I went home. In an attempt to not have a hangover for work the next morning, I drank like 10 glasses of water. I woke up in a giant p... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1339088680 | 1339104562 | t3_uq0s9 | t5_2to41 | 41 | [deleted]: TIFU: My college career may be in jeopardy due to a misunderstood Facebook post.
I'm shaking with nerves/stress/distraught right now. I can't handle this.
I'm the co-chair of the student theatre organization on my campus, and, as part of my duties, I must keep in contact with the theatre discipline to avoid... | 5 | 8.2 | |
1339031616 | 1339114075 | t3_uozjk | t5_2to41 | 15 | ohmahjah: TIFU: Peed my Pants
The title lies. It should be "TYAIFU" (Two Years Ago I Fucked Up).
This very well might be the worst moment in my life, and I hope it doesn't get any worse.
Let's flash back to 2010.
It was a sunny June. I had been out of fifth grade for about a month. I was a safety patrol at my school in... | 3 | 5 | |
1339095963 | 1339137106 | t3_uq7z0 | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU: Me vs. Wall and i won
So me and my dad haven't always gotten along, its a love hate kind of thing. Hes a technology guy so i asked him why my cell phone battery wasn't holding a charge anymore and he asked to look through it. Then he asks if he can delete a little weather updater i have and i told him ... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1339094731 | 1339664758 | t3_uq6q6 | t5_2to41 | 329 | escroto-peludo: TIFU by grabbing a fistful of man-pubes
I was post-shower when I noticed that the water level was quite high. I haven't had a problem with my shower drain clogging before, so naturally my first thought was that something had to be blocking it. I look down at what appears to be a loofah sitting on top of... | 8 | 41.125 | |
1339106103 | 1339149678 | t3_uqhus | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: TIFU: I did this to my mother's sidewalk.
[deleted]: What is that? A scratch or a scuff? If it's a scuff mark, you can just buff it out with some *goo gone*. If it's a scratch, I have no idea.
Famzilla: It was caused by the rim of a tire, and it looks like it just scratched the shiny paint on the top off..... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1339117217 | 1339212640 | t3_uqrvs | t5_2to41 | 90 | bashfulfruit: TIFU by trying to make a grilled cheese sandwich.
I don't really know how to cook, so I looked up how to make one from google. Use the wrong pan, let it heat up, and once I put butter in the pan it shot up in flames.
It was then followed by all my fire alarms going off and scaring the shit of me. I don't... | 7 | 12.857143 | |
1339107218 | 1339213914 | t3_uqivi | t5_2to41 | 25 | [deleted]: TIFU by saying "black person" instead of "blackboard" while giving a speech in Chinese
I was talking about how someone writes on a blackboard and how they hate the blackboard. It became a very interesting context.
feelsbadman.jpg
EDIT: This was in my Chinese class
Princess_Mango: Please don't write on me.
[... | 3 | 8.333333 | |
1339142054 | 1339151385 | t3_uraaw | t5_2to41 | 10 | ThePenisFish: TIFU by calling friend's brother ugly..
long story:
So, my best friend..Bob has a friend..John. Me and Bob driving home, Bob sais he need to visit John for a sec just to return smth he borrowed. We're standing at John's house and John comes..he looks...different - he's wearing stupid glasses, some strange... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1339139134 | 1339157794 | t3_ur8y7 | t5_2to41 | 75 | optomistprime: TIFU swinging on a pull-up bar
SOOooo My parent's house kinda has this pull up bar in the basement it's not like a proper bar its just some long iron/steel bar the previous owners nailed up, and put some steel cord on to keep it there. Been using it for the last few months no problems. yet tonight, I dec... | 3 | 25 | |
1339141870 | 1339504919 | t3_ura85 | t5_2to41 | 48 | Hoelt: TIFU: I accidentally poured out the gin of a customer's drink while the bartender wasn't looking, just before the bartender added the seltzer water and served it.
I work as a bus person in a bar and grill. I was taking some washed shot glasses out, and after I put them away one of the bartenders grabbed one of t... | 5 | 9.6 | |
1339161478 | 1339241643 | t3_urirh | t5_2to41 | 130 | MrGoldenVoice: TIFUpdate: After I got fired from my first job.
Okay, so after I got fired from the farm store, which honestly was not my type of store in the first place, I received a facebook message from a guy whom I had worked with at a local radio station doing sports. He tells me that there's been a new opening an... | 5 | 26 | |
1339177690 | 1339186693 | t3_urvrg | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU and lost half a percent of a file I was formatting and doing formulas on.
That half a percent is almost a million dollars of info. Oops. I will have to find it before my boss finds out I lost it.
Edit: I had lost more that than in pure dollars. I misplaced 3 mil... I should find it soon enough.
[dele... | 9 | 1 | |
1339184794 | 1339377689 | t3_us24p | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU my acting test
My English teacher is testing us on our ability to act. We started a couple weeks ago, and I get the act/scene that I want in Romeo and Juliet. I memorize all my lines and me and my partner make ours into a great comedy, basically mocking Romeo and Juliet. This goes over with my English t... | 5 | 4 | |
1339198720 | 1339215211 | t3_us9e4 | t5_2to41 | 36 | DykeButte: ಠ\_ಠ
wheresmyhouse: Well, he's technically not wrong.
DykeButte: Nor is he correct.
wheresmyhouse: Well he is... technically correct.
DykeButte: But at the same time, he is incorrect.
wheresmyhouse: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NuEIsqeRR1o&feature=youtu.be&t=5s
DykeButte: No.
w... | 15 | 2.4 | |
1339192089 | 1339216846 | t3_us8re | t5_2to41 | 8 | Xonix1234: Dog vomit on my wall
So today I was lying on my bed with my jack russel dog beside me, when all of a sudden he started heaving. He was getting ready to vomit so I picked him up and ran to my bathroom with him so he wouldnt puke on my bed or carpet floor. I had almost made it to my bathroom when all of a sudd... | 7 | 1.142857 | |
1339199180 | 1339206335 | t3_usejn | t5_2to41 | 31 | yout1014: TIFU by trying to go golfing during a ThunderStorm and hail strike.
Me and my brother were going to do some brother bonding before he goes to college. We tee'd off and al seemed normal, until my brother got hit in the head with a 1 inch chuck off ice hit his head, in the middle of summer. Me and him doubled i... | 3 | 10.333333 | |
1339203581 | 1339461946 | t3_ushug | t5_2to41 | 81 | Purecheetodust: TIFU and trusted a fart.
Was at work in my cubicle when I was hit with what I thought was just gas. Released my sphincter and proceeded to shit my pants. I had to walk halfway across the building, afraid that the turd that had just tricked me would fall out of my fucking pants. Made it to the bathroo... | 8 | 10.125 | |
1339213358 | 1339458633 | t3_usp1v | t5_2to41 | 25 | [deleted]: TIFU: Gave a stranger a ride and got robbed
So this actually happened about a month ago but I didn't think of posting until now.
My brother and I wanted to go out to some bars and what not for the usual 21st birthday celebration(his). His wife was our DD, driving my car. Anyway my brother and I are feeling ... | 4 | 6.25 | |
1339232834 | 1339550659 | t3_uszct | t5_2to41 | 79 | Kabibbles: TIFU: Getting in a knife fight with a bug
Just happened, this flying roach bug or something came running down my wall (We dont have roaches so I was freaked) and I was just chillin lookin at redit. I am barefoot and had my pocket knife right next to me so I whip it out and start stabbing at it. but he was re... | 10 | 7.9 | |
1339263294 | 1339532798 | t3_utdxb | t5_2to41 | 214 | [deleted]: TIFU: I stabbed myself in the pubes
Earlier today I was playing with one of my knives, an assisted opening knife with a damaged torsion bar. For those of you who aren't knife enthusiasts, that means the knife stays closed until you push on a part of the knife blade and then it springs open, and the damaged t... | 7 | 30.571429 | |
1339304522 | 1339462134 | t3_uu808 | t5_2to41 | 23 | fawkesmulder: TIFU by eating Jalapeno Poppers for breakfast and getting food poisoning
I have to drive from Los Angeles to Bakersfield and back every Saturday to work at the farmer's market. Like a fool, I only got a couple hours of sleep again. [Last time I almost swallowed my change.](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/com... | 4 | 5.75 | |
1339333769 | 1339396029 | t3_uujc2 | t5_2to41 | 370 | Gibs_is_anim_dom: TIFU: I pissed in the bin at the hospital.
Yesterday I had an incredible brain fart that I'm still trying to understand.
I badly needed a piss and rushed into a bathroom in the hospital where I work. I had a wrapper in my hand that I planned to throw in the bin after. Somehow my thoughts got scramble... | 10 | 37 | |
1339338528 | 1339383652 | t3_uuljr | t5_2to41 | 157 | [deleted]: TIFU with a terrible hookup.
This didn't happen to me today, but I just discovered this. Not for weak stomachs.
I was drinking. All of the best/most terrible things happen when I drink. This particular time, I was at a small get together with some friends. Everything was fine and dandy until there was a kno... | 7 | 22.428571 | |
1339344814 | 1339368478 | t3_uupcy | t5_2to41 | 25 | eskiimo: TIFU: and lost $500 on the ground. Now some lucky twat gets to have it.
Well, I was on Alien Blue (iPhone app that allows you to post on Reddit) and on my way to the ATM. During this time, I was posting comments in /r/new when all of a sudden I began to have an argument with some Redditor about some stupid lit... | 4 | 6.25 | |
1339350777 | 1339438951 | t3_uutjd | t5_2to41 | 2 | _acheron: TIFU: By falling asleep on a train.
Well, not so much today as a little while ago, but I just found this subreddit not long ago so I thought I'd share it with you all.
Here's a little backstory on how this wonderful event happened:
I don't get much sleep, due to bad habits and an enjoyment of reading/video ... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1339352001 | 1339380153 | t3_uuui4 | t5_2to41 | 223 | [deleted]: TIFU: Urinated on my keyboard
So, I was having this really intense dream this morning, the kind that feels more real than real life, and for some reason I felt like it was vitally important that I pee on something. In my half-asleep state I apparently got up, threw back the covers, and pissed directly and fr... | 7 | 31.857143 | |
1339364289 | 1339422177 | t3_uv4b0 | t5_2to41 | 75 | [deleted]: TIFU: Tried to masturbate, ended up peeing all around the house.
This is 4 or 5 years old, but the bin and keyboard threads reminded me of it.
You have to keep in mind the computer was temporally in the hall, don't ever make this to your teenage children please.
There was noone on the house, and I had mast... | 4 | 18.75 | |
1339356590 | 1340092918 | t3_uuy5j | t5_2to41 | 45 | ATierney: TIFU Made reservations for Fathers Day brunch, showed up today...It's not Fathers Day.
The lady laughed pretty hard for at least 5 minutes...
[deleted]: I feel youre pain. I called my dad today thinking it was Fathers Day... Dad probably wishes I wasnt his son...
Panderian109: Hopefully he's not that mad. It'... | 3 | 15 | |
1339379783 | 1339406268 | t3_uvgku | t5_2to41 | 28 | Metalhead62: TIFU my eye.
So I was playing the drums. While putting my hair behind my ear (There's got to be a better way to say this and it's just completely slipped my mind...) I jabbed the drumstick into my eye. As painful as it was initially, now I'm pretty sure I have a splinter in my eye. I cannot see out of it v... | 4 | 7 | |
1339386568 | 1339389550 | t3_uvm6g | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU: I won an argument with my wife.
So my wife decided to paint her and our daughter's finger and toe nails. She left the nail polish down and told our four year old daughter who like pretty colors not to touch them. Yea as you can imagine that didn't work at all. So my kid spilled the nail polish all ove... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1339387113 | 1339389093 | t3_uvmlp | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU Pissing everywhere in my bedroom
This wasn't today but it was a long time ago give or take 7 years old. One day I was watching tv, alas I felt the need too piss. Of course there was the bathroom, but I didn't feel like going to the bathroom. so I turned and walked straight into my bedroom and whipped it... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1339394095 | 1339455525 | t3_uvrdg | t5_2to41 | 45 | iTrollYhu: TIFU (Yeah, really original, I know.)
It was a couple days ago as school ended a while ago. I decided to do a prank on this last day of school. What could be my consequence if I get caught? So I had a spare water bottle, and a pin. I proceeded to poke a hole in the bottle. I squirted people with it for o... | 5 | 9 | |
1339410543 | 1339447810 | t3_uvyos | t5_2to41 | 290 | MissRippit: TIFU and accidentally deleted my friend's Skyrim character (he was level 54)
I feel so awful. I also realise that for gamers, this is a floggable offence and I was hoping you lovely peeps on Reddit may have an idea as to how I could make it up to him in any small way. The problem is there isn't really the i... | 18 | 16.111111 | |
1339434193 | 1339480929 | t3_uwdp4 | t5_2to41 | 33 | finallypoopedonketo: TIFU by severely overdosing on Mylanta
Two weeks ago I started doing keto to lose weight. At first it seemed too good to be true, bacon and eggs for breakfast, not really having to exercise, etc. and I was losing over a pound a day, but four days ago that all changed. In short I stopped pooping ... | 3 | 11 | |
1339442378 | 1339603956 | t3_uwl82 | t5_2to41 | 75 | Hovertac: TIFU: I took my iPod out of my pocket for and put it on my desk.
Back one day: I was having some problems with my iPod going slow, so I disabled location services, which disabled "Find my iPhone".
Today: Towards the end of my 9th period class, we were being dismissed 10 minutes early to go clean out our lock... | 7 | 10.714286 | |
1339399955 | 1339632127 | t3_uvuq2 | t5_2to41 | 17 | tricky5903: T(Someone else)FU- Gave himself a black eye by stepping on a rake.
We were out working in the garden at school, when this one guy decides to see if a rake will really smack you in the face if stepped on. He didn't have the common sense to hold out a hand, and the handle promptly hit him straight in the eye.... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1339446454 | 1340152401 | t3_uwp46 | t5_2to41 | 274 | beenhard33: TIFU and drank diesel fuel
At work today, while filling up a machine, I unknowingly let a substantial amount of diesel find its way into my jug of water. It's one of those rubbermaid gallon jugs and was only about a quarter full when the overflow from our skid-steer must have found its way down the drinkin... | 8 | 34.25 | |
1339421065 | 1339450085 | t3_uw3kl | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU important stuff in my browser
I just had my main computer and my old laptop running at the same time because a friend wants to borrow the laptop and I wanted to make it ready for him. I tend to save all kinds of important stuff in my browser, such as passwords, personalized links to websites and so on, ... | 4 | 1 | |
1339451143 | 1339470454 | t3_uwtlp | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU: Accidentally sent an email to 1275 students, professors, and faculty.
Whoops.
Edit: Content of the email included a lot of things which were not ready to be released yet. Planning for the future students mostly. So I'm bracing for the shit storm of potentially 1275 confused emails tomorrow when nothin... | 3 | 1 | |
1339453912 | 1339455298 | t3_uww1g | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by quitting fake weed
I'm fearful of the upcoming ban, so I decided to quit before it goes into effect so that way I don't have to go stone cold sober. This way I can allow my body time to adjust to sober life.
But now, I hate everything, and nothing in life is fun or rewarding. I think I made a huge... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1339476570 | 1339487433 | t3_uxfuq | t5_2to41 | 75 | neogrotesque: TIFU: I microwaved macaroni salad.
I've never had macaroni salad, okay?
This is the most awkward meal right now.
Michi_THE_Awesome: Don't. Don't eat it. This bodes of multiple toilet visits. None of them voluntary.
neogrotesque: That macaroni salad is long gone.
It was awkward at first, and by the t... | 3 | 25 | |
1339470838 | 1339609951 | t3_uxazz | t5_2to41 | 41 | khenson1283: TIFU: Got thrown out of my house, bit of a long story.
[deleted]: I don't even know what to say... You FUCKED your SISTER. How do you even make such a mistake? Drunk or not, there's no way in hell I would even consider being remotely sexual with any of my siblings. Good luck I guess? I'm not sure you can ... | 9 | 4.555556 | |
1339510862 | 1339715777 | t3_uxych | t5_2to41 | 332 | Cookies_nom_nom: TIFU by putting sperm in my ear.
So last night I was enjoying some alone fappy time while my girlfriend was playing skyrim in the other room. I was using headphones, but only one so I could hear her coming if she did, which she didn't. No, instead I got to fully enjoy my fap and finished up, had my pos... | 11 | 30.181818 | |
1339524132 | 1339616667 | t3_uyalm | t5_2to41 | 24 | dat_penguin: "T"IFU: Blacked/passed out after tailgating before DMB, woke up in hospital with parents 4 hours later
I only just found this subreddit, so in truth this fuck up actually took place on May 25th (my sincerest apologies).
I'll begin by stating the fact that I have never been to a concert before in my life. ... | 6 | 4 | |
1339522648 | 1339535956 | t3_uy93t | t5_2to41 | 153 | Bumbling_idiot: TIFU: May not be able to graduate from college
Well, here it is. 2 years ago I switched colleges within my university, from engineering to life science. I intended to major in Biochemistry. I failed dynamics (DAMN!), it was my own fault. Well I transfer, and meet my new advisor, who tells me that I am f... | 3 | 51 | |
1339545890 | 1339732183 | t3_uyvrj | t5_2to41 | 61 | Hovertac: TIFUpdate: I took my iPod out of my pocket for and put it on my desk.
I looked around to see if I could figure out who stole my iPod, I asked my friend if he accidentally took it, but to no avail, it was not found. So I'm pretty sad, but oh well, I guess it was just lost and my private contents won't be compr... | 6 | 10.166667 | |
1339555372 | 1340031823 | t3_uz4is | t5_2to41 | 44 | booksandpowertools: TIFU banged a "friend's" gf and bout a pack of cigarettes
This may not be the place for this particular confession but I want to get this off my chest, and as I'm not Catholic, this seems like as a good a place as any.
I've been trying to do me better lately (eating better, quit smoking, excersic... | 8 | 5.5 | |
1339558730 | 1339610797 | t3_uz7mg | t5_2to41 | 628 | CallMeCatman: TIFU by falling face first into boobs.
Kinda self explanitory. I was walking in the halls, talking to my friend, when I tripped on whateverthefuck. Little did I notice the girl infront of me. I fell face first into her chest infront of a hallway full of kids. Accidental Motorboat. I have never been so del... | 5 | 125.6 | |
1339571631 | 1339617982 | t3_uzh6o | t5_2to41 | 10 | rainbow-ostrich: TIFU by accidentally giving my friends consent to have sex at my house.
Me and three friends were walking home from school and stopped for about twenty minutes on the corner where we part ways when my one friend said that if you stare at someone in the eye for seven seconds it means that you either wan... | 5 | 2 | |
1339603492 | 1339679045 | t3_uzzb2 | t5_2to41 | 117 | momoney181: TIFU and pissed in some random chicks dorm
So this particular event didn't happen to me just now, it occurred about 3 or 4 months ago during my spring break.
Me and another friend of mine were back in town from college for spring break, and had planned to go up to Madison, Wisconson and visit some friends... | 3 | 39 | |
1339600112 | 1339736991 | t3_uzwdp | t5_2to41 | 15 | captainpungent: TIFU my espressomaker & my right hand
I put my fairly new espressomaker on the stove and then got lost in fixing my bike. When the smell of the molten plastic hit my room I rushed over and, out of pure stupidity, grabbed it to throw it into the sink. Ouch.
kingdavecako: It's called a "moka pot"; gra... | 5 | 3 | |
1339618360 | 1339651331 | t3_v0dql | t5_2to41 | 181 | PaleHorse94: TIFU: Spilled Nacho Cheese All Over My Man-Parts
Well, I work at Taco Bell and we have to have all our Nacho Cheese on line at once. This is usually about 4-5 bags. They don't always fit in the front and the one that I tried to bring forward had been sitting in the back of our heated line for about 3 hours... | 7 | 25.857143 | |
1339618442 | 1339872021 | t3_v0dtn | t5_2to41 | 184 | yout1014: TIFU by going on reddit with my school laptop.
So I was bored when doing some homework and decided to go on reddit. Being the derp I am I clicked on a couple of nswf links. Now my school has a very strict policy about going on sites like reddit and about pornography. Well, I haven't gotten called to the tech ... | 10 | 18.4 | |
1339619130 | 1339653287 | t3_v0eii | t5_2to41 | 47 | asnof: TIFU passed out instead of having sex
Well last night was my best friends 20th birthday. Drinks were had and it was an amazing night, except I dont remember too much of it. I woke up in her bed and we had clothes on so if we did do it I certainly cant remember. DAMNIT!
Chainmail_Danno: Was expecting a story. ... | 6 | 7.833333 | |
1339611840 | 1339701689 | t3_v07di | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: sent office wide e-mail and included a different office.
AyoChoice: Helpdesk giveth and helpdesk taketh away
[deleted]: i do enjoy the "taketh away" part.
| 3 | 3.333333 | |
1339638587 | 1339690428 | t3_v0wih | t5_2to41 | 113 | Assaultman67: TIFU: Had my employee review, talked my way down in efficiency
I had recently been hired on as a new engineer out of college.
My boss was giving me an employee review and marked me as "100% efficient".
When He got to that point he said something along the lines of "I'm very excited as to how well you're... | 7 | 16.142857 | |
1339647070 | 1339702752 | t3_v1478 | t5_2to41 | 23 | CanFace: TIFU Set fire to the carpet in my house.
Was walking through my house with a long strand of toilet paper I had been using to blow my nose (no tissues were present). Decided to lit some incense in my room so grabbed some and a lighter. Tried lighting the incense while walking to my room and accidentally set fir... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1339636377 | 1339741430 | t3_v0uib | t5_2to41 | 57 | SweetJimmyK: TIFU: Switching internet companies results in having to deal with the real world
So I switched out my ISP yesterday, and was using their email system. I forgot to update my Battle.net account email before hand. Got a message saying my account is locked, tried to unlock it and it sent an email to the acco... | 6 | 9.5 | |
1339673886 | 1339688654 | t3_v1idm | t5_2to41 | 63 | [deleted]: TIFU by waking up late for work, calling in saying I'll be 30 minutes late then calling in again out sick.
Why? Because my alarm didn't work, oh right, and I'm fucking retarded to call in twice.
TheByteBandit: "The doctor said it was the worst case of the shits he'd ever seen."
No one will question it.
[de... | 3 | 21 | |
1339684219 | 1339726988 | t3_v1ojn | t5_2to41 | 286 | ClairdeWhimsy: TIFU by going 21,000 miles without an oil change and SURPRISE! my car gave up the ghost.
My car has been making this weird noise for a couple of weeks, you see, and when I was Advanced Auto with my husband yesterday buying a new battery for his vehicle, I asked the nice man if he wouldn't mind taking a ... | 11 | 26 | |
1339683442 | 1339720645 | t3_v1nxr | t5_2to41 | 58 | bebemaster: TIFU when attempting to replace honda brake rotor...
So I had a few hours and the weather was nice so I decide that I can go ahead and put new pads and rotors on (which I had previously bought) my car. I was having a tough time getting the rotor off the hub. The usual method of breaking it loose with a hamm... | 6 | 9.666667 |
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