start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1375493398 | 1375507884 | null | t5_2to41 | 129 | Ex-Stripper: TIFU by tanning topless
I've been back home from university for summer holidays, spending time with my family, and occasionally tanning out on our balcony (we live in the city, no beaches nearby, but the balcony is just fine for that little bit of sunshine).
We usually all have different things to do over... | 4 | 32.25 | |
1375497471 | 1375628412 | null | t5_2to41 | 77 | thowawaypooperson: TIFU by believing my kid, then getting caught in a traffic jam.
In hindsight, the wife and I should have seen it coming. Our youngest son is a legendary pants pooper in our family. At eight and a half years old, he's on a roll to set the record for the most ruined pairs of underwear in a single child... | 8 | 9.625 | |
1375493522 | 1375500475 | null | t5_2to41 | 1 | CuntSnatcheroo: TIFU: By not knowing how to react
I emailed this to my buddy and figured I'd share it with you nice folk to rip on me about my fuck up today :(
So I was just leaving the gym now after obviously working out. I have a nice "pump" going on from lifting upper body and my supplements. As I'm walking out ahe... | 3 | 0.333333 | |
1375503084 | 1375503583 | null | t5_2to41 | -7 | Captain_whackschlong: TIFU by masterbating.
Well a little background, I'm a 16 year old with a craving for lady yummy. Well I whack my sack about 4 times a day. Yeah, I know that's alot.
Anyway, I was watching television and saw this victorious secret commercial and my willy wanted to get a little silly so I got up an... | 3 | -2.333333 | |
1375511696 | 1375536856 | null | t5_2to41 | 0 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidentally calling my ex-girlfriend immediately after a text.
This actually happened a few weeks ago.
We had been broken up for a couple months at that point, hadn't talked to her since that day, but one day she randomly texted me out of the blue just to check up for whatever reason.
My phone is... | 3 | 0 | |
1375508569 | 1375845492 | null | t5_2to41 | 56 | TresDigitus: TA(rcher)FU by cock-blocking.
So I was doing a bit of coding while my girlfriend was playing a game, and I randomly got up to stretch while watching Archer. My girlfriend got up at the same time, and we decided to give each other a hug (aw). I said something about working too hard on my project, and she ... | 4 | 14 | |
1375519082 | 1375520401 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU By slamming my dick in the side of my luxury sedan
So, I just bought a new sedan for me and my girlfriend. This is a a 4 door BMW. It is my first nice car so i was extremely excited about it.
I was coming back after picking up some groceries I was getting the bread and butter out and I dropped my phone.... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1375521909 | 1375548506 | null | t5_2to41 | 229 | tetrix_: TIFU by going on r/nsfw at work
Went on r/nsfw at work and guess what happens twenty minutes later... all of reddit got blocked. today, i sincerely fucked up. the rest of the day was very bland and uninteresting and i cringe at what next week will be like.
edit: i work a retail job that is going out of busine... | 9 | 25.444444 | |
1375524692 | 1375778268 | null | t5_2to41 | 186 | JaDinklageMorgoone: TIFU by dropping my doritos locos taco...
Tonight started like any other night for an 18 year old boy. A beautiful, brisk summer breeze folliwed by the melodious chirping of a thousand crickets. Pretty blissful right? Well I was hungry, and there wasn't too much to eat in the food department in the ... | 4 | 46.5 | |
1375535979 | 1375642613 | null | t5_2to41 | 2,514 | VagabondofFunk: TIFU by accidentally leaking a personal sex tape via LimeWire 7 years ago. [NSFW]
Okay, so it wasn't today, but today is when I found out I'd done it.
Seven years ago, I filmed my then girlfriend and I having sex. We were both 17, and I did it with the same camcorder I'd been using to record our tablet... | 15 | 167.6 | |
1375537924 | 1375577835 | null | t5_2to41 | 124 | squirtgunheadphones: TIFU by breaking both of my wrists
i was hanging out with a girl i have known for a little while and have some serious feelings for. we were shooting baskets at the park behind my house when i decided i should dunk it to show off a little bit. i missed the dunk but grabbed the rim and swung forwar... | 7 | 17.714286 | |
1375550659 | 1375624429 | null | t5_2to41 | 22 | Tug_Fugler: TIFU by forgetting to copy my dad's backup folder to a external hard drive
So.
I had my dad weasel all of his files into a folder I made called BACKUP on his desktop. I was then going to copy that to my backup hard drive, format the drives and reinstall windows 7.
However, I had just gotten my Oculus Rift... | 3 | 7.333333 | |
1375566535 | 1375827827 | null | t5_2to41 | 53 | tunguskanraider: TIFU by punching myself in the face.
Well, I was at work taking out the trash (I work at a Chick-fil-a). I'm in the back struggling to remove the bag from the can. It was so full that the bag had created a vacuum in the can making it difficult to remove. All of a sudden, a hot co-worker comes to get so... | 4 | 13.25 | |
1375577965 | 1375715306 | null | t5_2to41 | 34 | madspanyard: Tifu by changing my own oil
So for years i thought it would be cool to be able to change my own oil. I finally decided today was the day. Only i didnt drain my oil, i drained my transmission fluid.
Ok back to the store to get more trans fluid and a pump to put it in (weird angle) put it in and removed and... | 9 | 3.777778 | |
1375588222 | 1375630102 | null | t5_2to41 | 96 | Gaijinloco: TIFU by making my friend miss her international flight home from Japan
I got up on time, but was preoccupied with getting her some photos loaded onto a USB, and wound up leaving for the airport late. She got there half an hour before the flight left, but because she hadn't online checked in, she wasn't allo... | 7 | 13.714286 | |
1375595345 | 1375683609 | null | t5_2to41 | 597 | ThePotatoGods12: TIFU by going to the shittiest birthday party ever.
Ladies and gentlemen, we have a bundle of fuck-ups for your viewing pleasure tonight!
Today was my sisters birthday. For weeks could not, for the life of her, figure out what she wanted for her birthday and finally, she decided to head up to Ruidoso ... | 10 | 59.7 | |
1375634764 | 1375673439 | null | t5_2to41 | 82 | sweaterking6: TIFU by swatting at a fat ass fly in my house.
Hey all, here's a short one.
Today one of my brothers came home from college for a visit, and brought a ton of his shit with him. I was recruited to carry all of it in from the car. Several bins of filthy laundry later, I was done. Not only was my brother h... | 4 | 20.5 | |
1375634529 | 1375659694 | null | t5_2to41 | 34 | nellapoo: TIFU by leaving a candle burning
So I remembered another fuck up from my youth and this was a good one.
A friend of mine was having a "my mom is away for the weekend" party at her apartment. We were all 15-16 having a good time staying up all night, drinking the tiny bit of alcohol we managed to find/steal.... | 5 | 6.8 | |
1375643701 | 1375761545 | null | t5_2to41 | 32 | [deleted]: TIFU by losing my first pay-check.
Pretty simple really, I walked home from work late at night and it fell out of my pocket. To make it worse it fell out of my pocket at the end of a huge festival (Caribana) and the garbage vehicules quickly sucked up all the trash in the area before I could look around and ... | 8 | 4 | |
1375646997 | 1375811919 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,380 | doomtowns: TIFU exploding a hole into my ceiling with a vacuum-sealed coffee tumbler full of vinegar and baking soda.
So .. I was cleaning the lid of my coffee tumbler with about 3 tablespoons of baking soda and two cups of vinegar. Sealed it up (Contigo vacuum seals and can spray boiling steam out when you first use i... | 8 | 172.5 | |
1375636505 | 1375663047 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | [deleted]: TIFU by looking totally racist
Background: when I was 17, a mental health professional wanted to evaluate me for an autism spectrum disorder. I'm not autistic (and I didn't let him push me to get evaluated, pretty sure he just wanted money), but I *do* fuck up all the time by not remembering people's faces. ... | 3 | 16.666667 | |
1375655912 | 1376077870 | null | t5_2to41 | 284 | i_wotsisname: TIFU by sneezing mid-piss.
It's pretty straightforward really.
5am, I'm standing in front of the throne half asleep, balancing on my heels because the tiles are cold as fuck. I'm just relaxing into the relief of a nice long, early morning piss when the most horrendous and unexpected sneeze rocks me off b... | 5 | 56.8 | |
1375669911 | 1375883087 | null | t5_2to41 | 46 | CLDBL00DED: TIFU by not properly anchoring a boat
Well, here's the story.
My father, aunt, and I decided to go for a boat ride to a local oceanside restaurant. It's one of those restaurants where you tie your boat up to a mooring, and a launch boat picks you up and takes you to the restaurant.
Well today, there were ... | 4 | 11.5 | |
1375672577 | 1375712088 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: tonight I fucked up by cutting through the hedge
so I go outside at about 11 and smoke up a j around the block, I'm done, I've been done for like 5 minutes and I'm just chillin walking around the block and now I'm about 5/8 around the block fuck how many times I've said around the block and my brain thinks w... | 4 | 1 | |
1375678604 | 1375681298 | null | t5_2to41 | -7 | tehlostrogue: TIFU by cutting my hair
Well, tomorrow is senior portrait day and today my parents forced me to get my hair cut. So since I didn't have time to go to the barbers my dad cut it (as he has for most of my life cause before last year i liked it short) although I asked for it to be trimmed he kept cutting. Wel... | 8 | -0.875 | |
1375677486 | 1375699729 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | DrBurst: TIFU by organizing a guest speaker, making the professor lose confidence in the speaker because I self-deprecated, then making the guest pissed that her time was cut in half.
Now I have to cancel. I suck and this is why I shouldn't talk to people or extend my neck.
[deleted]: Care to explain?
DrBurst: I saw ... | 4 | 2 | |
1375673923 | 1376071722 | null | t5_2to41 | 83 | DiabeticGypsy: TIFU by trying to piss in the sink.
I was out at a party last night and was supposed to be home by 12. That however was not the case and i ended up stumbling into my house at about 1:30. Luckily my parents were sound asleep, now came the challenge of preparing for bed without waking them. I began brushin... | 6 | 13.833333 | |
1375701976 | 1375720040 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | throwawaymate213: TIFU by blowing my chances with an awesome girl.
Ok. So I just came back from my second date with her. I took her out to a museum which she seemed to enjoy a lot. Then afterwards, I took her out to a picnic with some wraps, fruit salad, red velvet cupcakes, and some fancy berry lemondade (went a littl... | 6 | 2.833333 | |
1375707844 | 1375716632 | null | t5_2to41 | 48 | potato_dreams: TIFU by ruining my favorite panties...
... and my reputation, probably.
I guess it's technically "last Friday night IFU" but whatever.
I didn't want to share this story with anyone at first but now I just feel like I need to get it out of my head. Also, this is my first post, English is my 2nd lang... | 6 | 8 | |
1375722581 | 1375724384 | null | t5_2to41 | 6 | lilEndian: TIFU by shitting all over my bedroom and putting it in a bottle
Before anything, an album of pictures: http://imgur.com/a/mX5iQ
Here is how all of this came about. The time was last night, and I was thinking "You know what would be cool? I should shit on my floor and play with it.". It wouldn't have been th... | 3 | 2 | |
1375726708 | 1375745404 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by starting to shave my legs.
I tried to shave my legs today because I cd, and I haven't finished. I did one leg up to about an inch below the knee and it was pretty easy, aside from the back of the leg and those spots. For some reason it's harder the further up I go and I really don't feel like doing t... | 5 | 1 | |
1375730800 | 1375759212 | null | t5_2to41 | 262 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting my face covered in nettle stings
So I have an older car. The bolts holding the plastic cover that protects the bottom of the engine have gotten a bit stripped, and my mechanic just MacGyver's it on with zip ties. The other weekend we were a few hours from home when it gave way and it ended... | 6 | 43.666667 | |
1375723951 | 1375735681 | null | t5_2to41 | 90 | InMyHole: TIFU - Thought His Mom Was His Dad
Today I visited my cousin's husband's childhood home where his elderly mother still lives. I've only gotten to know him recently and think he is a great man. His mother was very nice and invited me into the house to have breakfast. I didn't get a good look at her face as I w... | 4 | 22.5 | |
1375729640 | 1375736765 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | Throwaway8513: TIFU by sleeping with my GF's best friend
The basics:
I'm in a relationship. It's semi-serious, still measuring in months rather than years though.
My girlfriend, now to be referred to as GF, is out of town for a few weeks. She is NOT the forgiving type.
We have a mutual friend, the GF's best friend a... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1375734653 | 1375758807 | null | t5_2to41 | 298 | Bason-Jateman: TIFU By resubmitting an order to sell my stock when the website was having major issues.
Logged in to my trading account through a major online trade company and sold 10,000 shares of stock. I received an error message that I've never seen (database not working etc).
I checked my recent orders and noth... | 8 | 37.25 | |
1375739364 | 1375745887 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | SoccerBopper: TIFU and kicked a weeaboo in the cooch
So I play girls' soccer, alright? This stupid girl from the other team ran into me when I was about to kick the ball hard and thrust into my leg. I couldn’t stop myself… My foot went right in her groin. She dropped, and started to roll in the grass, covering her vag.... | 7 | 4.714286 | |
1375750351 | 1375932409 | null | t5_2to41 | 929 | CharlesMonsoon420: TIFU by getting high and watching porn
Fuck guys, this just happened.
It's just another day in the Monsoon household, I'm polishing the ol' pussy penetrator, porn's playing, everything is good. When I finally finish, it goes fucking everywhere, including all over my mouse and my keyboard. Fuck!
I'm... | 14 | 66.357143 | |
1375738800 | 1375821934 | null | t5_2to41 | 45 | CiiMassacre: TIFU by Learning My Music Can Break Glass
Just last night I got back from a long day of work, so I decided to have a glass of wine and watch TV before bed. Seems like a nice way to end a day, and surely the next would be better, right? Not quite.
Today I got out of work an hour or so earlier than usual a... | 5 | 9 | |
1375753740 | 1375797386 | null | t5_2to41 | 544 | [deleted]: TIFU by letting my boyfriend lick the bootyhole.
So this was about a week ago. My boyfriend and I consistently hang out and we don’t mind. Sometimes, being stuck in a room with Netflix running all day can get a bit boring, so you know. We entertain ourselves. With sex. And lots of it. He’s the type who loves... | 9 | 60.444444 | |
1375759364 | 1375782148 | null | t5_2to41 | 9 | pineapple_t-rexpress: TIFU; I dropped my earing in the toilet
I had taken out my metal fleshie/tunnel thingo to wash it because if you don't for about a week it begins to smell like feet and pee pee shit and stuff like that.
I took it out in my bathroom on-suite (because my room is pimp like that) which also has the to... | 3 | 3 | |
1375762300 | 1375812986 | null | t5_2to41 | 227 | Hail-Throwaway: TIFU by talking dirty to my girl in front of her brother
It's 9:30, me and my girlfriend hop in the car, leaving her house. She has two little siblings (M/12 & F/14 that get on my nerves and her nerves quite often and one used to always sneak in the back of the car and accompany us on the ride home ... | 5 | 45.4 | |
1375747899 | 1375789958 | null | t5_2to41 | 283 | Rufus2468: TIFU in the form of a haiku.
Picked my nose today.
Perforated cartilage.
Bleeding profusely.
CrazyCatLassie: Dumb question, but how many syllables is 'picked'? Would it be counted like pick-ed or pict?
Rufus2468: I'm just counting it as one. As an Australian, I'm British enough to pronounce "cartilage" as ... | 6 | 47.166667 | |
1375766505 | 1375795610 | null | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by being high and having sex
So, my SO And I smoked and went to bed, which eventually led to sex.
Everything was going awesome, it was the best sex we've had. I figured, "meh, it must be because I'm high", little did I know that the condom had fallen off at some point. And he had ejaculated into me.
S... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1375782056 | 1375929992 | null | t5_2to41 | 558 | CCgamer: TIFU by drinking tea...
Ok so this wasn't exactly today but encompasses my whole last week.
I was fairly sick and stuck with one of the worst sore throats I've had in a long while; unfortunately for me it wasn't strep throat so I couldn't just take an antibiotic and be done with it. So this sore throat makes ... | 5 | 111.6 | |
1375782102 | 1375818900 | null | t5_2to41 | 25 | JaDinklageMorgoone: TIFU by letting a huge moth survive...
Before you ask, yes I am the same person that posted the doritos locos dog shit catastrophe the other day. I thought that was the end of the fuck ups. But the fates jest, and this one is much more terrifying, but only slighlty less disgusting. Let us begin.
To... | 4 | 6.25 | |
1375803175 | 1375825535 | null | t5_2to41 | 113 | MrOwnageQc: TIFU by losing a girl's number
First of all, i'm not very good at telling stories, plus english isn't my native language, so my appologizes for the lack of grammar :). Anyway.. I was on vacation at Hampton Beach, New-Hempshire. I was on the beach, enjoying a frozen yogurt and this beautiful girl walks by. T... | 6 | 18.833333 | |
1375811014 | 1375893153 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,473 | [deleted]: TIFU by doing an interview in my underwear.
My life is a joke.
I had an opportunity for a phone interview at a great start-up and unlike a lot of the shady companies that had interviewed me in the past few days, this one seemed like a great opportunity to do something exciting. When I'm in my element and co... | 12 | 122.75 | |
1375825314 | 1375825659 | null | t5_2to41 | 2 | ThisLittleBoy: TIFU by stapling my finger.
It's a dull day in the dog days of summer and I'm idly lying down on my bed. I notice that I have a stapler on my desk next to my bed. Awesome. It was like one of those moments where you look down and you remember that you have a penis so you do what's natural and start playin... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1375827778 | 1375908633 | null | t5_2to41 | 65 | FizzPig: TIFU by making it so I'm going to be bicycling 40 miles a day when school starts
My problem actually started/happened months ago but I only just realized what I did.
I always tend to sign up for my classes at the university of New Mexico a little bit later than I should but I've never really had any problems w... | 10 | 6.5 | |
1375822661 | 1375998671 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | jodega: TIFU by wandering off drunk in Ecuador
So the SO and I are in Ecuador on vacation and we are flying out to Panama City and 6 am the following morning. We've been on a bit of a day drunk and he's tired and I'm bored. I decide to wander off to an internet cafe where I end up meeting some fun travellers and we hea... | 4 | 8.75 | |
1375833576 | 1375867440 | null | t5_2to41 | 41 | field1: TIFU by doing my hair and watching Netflix.
Out of boredom, I decided to curl my hair while I watched a movie.
I absentmindedly grabbed the wrong end of the curling iron. Pain...lots of pain, ensued.
I am currently a lefty with the (temporary) inability to use my left hand, as it is burned and blistered by ... | 5 | 8.2 | |
1375838744 | 1375839233 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | oscarzr: TIFU by babysitting.
So there I am, looking to impress the little four year old I'm babysitting. I get up to the diving board, and I plan on doing a front flip like I have performed a million times. But alas, today is no normal day my friends, for fate had another idea in mind. I load up, and take a mighty ... | 4 | 8.25 | |
1375851391 | 1375894040 | null | t5_2to41 | 50 | [deleted]: TIFU by relapsing
I started attending a Narcotics Anonymous group exactly 30 days ago, and now I found myself once again drinking booze and snorting coke like I promised myself, God, and others that I would never do again. 30 amazing days down the drain by using again, and I'm feeling really shitty about it.... | 4 | 12.5 | |
1375851869 | 1375855669 | null | t5_2to41 | 34 | Wirley: TIFU by having a threesome.
This fuck up was actually a few says ago, the weekend more precisely.
it began with me and my best friend just hanging out waiting to go to a fair with these girls. One of the girls has been like a sister to me and ive talked with her everyday for months. so anyway we go and pick th... | 7 | 4.857143 | |
1375845737 | 1375929716 | null | t5_2to41 | 97 | linusvp98: TIFU by kicking myself in the balls.
This isn't a long story, but it still qualifies as a certifiable fuck up in my opinion. Let's begin...
So, I had just returned from a run, and I was obviously tired. I lay down in my bed after stretching for around five minutes. I try to just stretch out a little bit in ... | 4 | 24.25 | |
1375854966 | 1375896059 | null | t5_2to41 | 40 | [deleted]: TIFU By giving my brother my amazon information so he could use my prime benefits.
I ended up having to open a new amazon account to order myself a vibrator and i didn't get to use free two day shipping.
scrndude: ICANSEEYOUVIBRATING
ICANSEEYOUFAPPING: [(┌ -‿-)┌](http://imgur.com/IeGU4jR)
ICanHearYouPoop: I... | 5 | 8 | |
1375868766 | 1375934313 | null | t5_2to41 | 26 | csdeadboy1980: TIFU by using my leg as an ashtray...
So, this actually happened a few years ago, but I was reminded of it by reading another TIFU post and thought is was worthy of this sub...
I was a college freshman at the time, and was leaving a marching band rehearsal when my car broke down. I managed to limp it to ... | 3 | 8.666667 | |
1375890932 | 1375893628 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | [deleted]: TIFU by not properly configuring the set up between my client's online payment form and their Authorize,net account. It took 2 months to notice.
Turns out in Wordpress there's a 3rd (obscure) setting which connects Gravity Forms to Authorize.net: the "Authorize.net Feed". Building a form and successfully co... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1375893915 | 1375934123 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,378 | kicksmalone: TIFU by making my extended family listen to me rip ass. [probably NSFW]
So I'm visiting my grandparents and uncle today for a sort of nice family get-together. They live downtown in a fairly small appartment; about 3 rooms, a kitchen, and a bathroom.
The problem is, I had eaten two entire buckets of extre... | 10 | 137.8 | |
1375894347 | 1375915107 | null | t5_2to41 | 148 | ElleEmEnnoPea: TIFU by leaving the title of my new car in the glovebox...
I recently got a new job, so I cashed in my savings and bought a little used car (my first ever!) so I could make the commute back and forth. I had the car for exactly four days before it was stolen. And thanks to leaving the title in the glovebo... | 7 | 21.142857 | |
1375896020 | 1375997687 | null | t5_2to41 | 397 | Fecesofwar: TIFU by trying to piss while biking
*I've posted before here. Karma's a bitch.*
A couple days ago we were set for a big rainstorm, so I decided to ride my bike. It's always nice to get out in warm rain. So I went out for a few miles up along a forest preserve path, and once it started drizzling, I turned a... | 9 | 44.111111 | |
1375900553 | 1375936564 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | sonicbird: TIFU by saying the wrong thing to a girl
So I was texting this girl that I'm interested in, and everything's going as it usually is, we're just texting back and forth, no problem. Then she starts giving shorter answers, and the way she was texting I could tell something was wrong. So, naturally, I asked what... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1375923058 | 1376088049 | null | t5_2to41 | 73 | Farts_Smell: TIFU by not removing an Obama-Biden 2012 bumper sticker from a used car I recently paid off.
I was just outside in front of my trailer playing with my two year old son and I got an unpleasant, drive-by shouting. He screamed:
>Good job voting for Obama!
>Maybe he can get your family out of that trail... | 7 | 10.428571 | |
1375921863 | 1375928323 | null | t5_2to41 | 1 | [deleted]: TIFU By ending up at a drug dealers house.
So it all started out like a normal night, hanging out with some close friends at a car/bike show. We were all having a good time till the Vagos and Hells Angels got into a bit of a fight and we decided to leave. A random guy pulls my friend and I aside asking us if... | 3 | 0.333333 | |
1375925569 | 1376011816 | null | t5_2to41 | 31 | willdapod: TIFU by nearly breaking my spine
So I went to a party and after about 5 hours some people were really drunk, I don't drink so I found it all hilarious and around this point someone had the brilliant idea to go the park. It had been raining so everything was slippy and I being the only fully sober one thought... | 5 | 6.2 | |
1375932547 | 1375948645 | null | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU This may be more of Did I Fuck Up? I don't think there is a sub for that
I Gorilla Glued my broken crown into my mouth that I've had repaired a few times now by my dentist. It keeps breaking off and I'm tired of paying to have it fixed. The Gorilla Glue seems to be working. Three days. So, did I fuck up... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1375931937 | 1376034812 | null | t5_2to41 | 20 | karmajuney: TIFU by locking myself outside of the house overnight
his didn't actually happen today, this happened about a year ago. I lived in the middle of nowhere and I had only one neighbor who spoke Russian so I had no communication with anyone. I'm just having an ordinary day and my parents are out at some work pa... | 6 | 3.333333 | |
1375940597 | 1375994703 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,026 | elfa82: TIFU by trying to bug my wife
I had just got out of the bath while my wife was in bed using the laptop. As I walked to the cupboard to grab a towel, she whistled at me in a taunting cat call kind of way. Since I was soaking wet, I decided that I was going to go and give her a big hug and get her wet. As I ha... | 14 | 73.285714 | |
1375942190 | 1375991900 | null | t5_2to41 | 167 | TheBigDsOpinion: TIFU and got my testicles stuck. Out of curiosity, I removed the screw on top to one of those 60 pieces of gum containers, and put my testicles inside it to jack off. Now its stuck, and hurts too bad to pull it off. Help me please.
UPDATE: Well, it's free. Sank my junk into a mop bucket of COLD water, ... | 10 | 16.7 | |
1375942697 | 1376016185 | null | t5_2to41 | 42 | MrMeatScience: TIFU by decorating the trees with turkey
Strictly speaking, this happened quite some years ago, but I think this will be appreciated here.
I was out camping with some friends in Virginia when I was about 16 years old. We had packed in our food, which in this case happened to be various canned things (no... | 3 | 14 | |
1375954758 | 1375960614 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | NinetyTwo92: TIFU by getting up too fast.
So as I was laying down on the couch in the living room after a full meal I started to doze off and ended up falling asleep. I was woken up by my parents telling me to get up and that some of our family was in the drive-way. I was still pretty much sleeping and really didn't wa... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1375943668 | 1375976700 | null | t5_2to41 | 8 | ScottBancroft1: TIFU by eating too quickly
So this isn't necessarily *today* but about 4 months ago. I was sitting down to eat lunch at school with my friend and a girl that I like. That day we had turkey and gravy over mashed potatoes for lunch. I fucking love turkey-gravy day so I was eating quickly as I usually do. ... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1375964054 | 1376184252 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,211 | kingofvodka: TIFU by trying to meet a friend for lunch
So yesterday I was chatting to my friend on facebook. We hadn't met up in a while, so we made plans to go get lunch together at 12 the following day (today).
So 12 arrives, I'm at the meetup place, she's not there. So I decide to send her a text. But I made a typo... | 10 | 121.1 | |
1375978555 | 1375998741 | null | t5_2to41 | -67 | TiFu_Prairie: TIFU at my promotion meeting for a high salary position..[NSFW]
So my me,my boss, my manager, and 8 others being promoted were sitting around our big conference table, the meeting felt like it was taking hours and I was just waiting for someone from FUCKING HEAD OFFICE to get around to reading my promotio... | 12 | -5.583333 | |
1375977923 | 1375990963 | null | t5_2to41 | 91 | merchantco: TIFU by saying "I love you" to a girl I barely knew
For the first fourteen years of my life, I had very little social interaction. I was home-schooled, lived in a second world country, and had one true friend: my computer. One might call me a nerd, or perhaps a geek, but to me, I'm just socially inept. Howe... | 3 | 30.333333 | |
1375981723 | 1375985316 | null | t5_2to41 | 37 | pesh527: TIFU by spilling deer piss on myself
I was reminded about a fuck up of mine from a year ago by a [comment] (http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/1jw8gy/tifu_by_trying_to_piss_while_biking/cbjfm4l) on the [TIFU by trying to piss while biking] (http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/1jw8gy/tifu_by_trying_to_piss... | 4 | 9.25 | |
1375984780 | 1376619721 | null | t5_2to41 | 35 | jurlol12: TIFU by no paying attention while pooping
So my story begun early this morning. It was around 2 am when it happened. I was still using my laptop and my phone chatting with friends because I just returned from a 3 week vacation. Suddenly I felt the urge to poop. Not that uncommon but still. I decided to take m... | 4 | 8.75 | |
1375997861 | 1376005548 | null | t5_2to41 | 113 | The_Lolbster: TIFU by telling my boss, "you're a big boy, you can do it"
I... I just don't know what came over me. It was totally innocent context, but he was mocking me for something, so I mocked back.
Instant regret.
belatwk76: Hey, if he was being condescending, he deserved it!
The_Lolbster: He was mocking me about... | 5 | 22.6 | |
1375996727 | 1376019433 | null | t5_2to41 | 153 | Lahmfan31: TIFU by raging too hard
For Context, whenever my phone rings, I lose internet. I really should get it fixed, but am too lazy.
Anyways, I was playing League of Legends when someone decided to call. I didn't know the number, so I just let it ring. Nbd, I just waited a minute and continued my game. They co... | 8 | 19.125 | |
1375990957 | 1376036125 | null | t5_2to41 | 52 | MasterFasth: TIFU by greeting my neighbour
So I've been to Switzerland for a week, and got home yesterday, and we didn't give them much warning that we were leaving.
Well, today I went out to buy some groceries, and I took my bike as I'm wont to do when I go shopping.
When on the way home, just on on the slope up to... | 6 | 8.666667 | |
1376002467 | 1376018234 | null | t5_2to41 | 73 | kinger97: TIFU by taking a break
So I work at a small nursery. There are usually 3-4 guys working outside, and 3 girls working in the store. During the springtime, this is a pretty cool job, loading plants, trees, shrubs, mulch, whatever. I don't get a lot of boring down-time. But come summer, those words could not be ... | 3 | 24.333333 | |
1376005550 | 1376016680 | null | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by having D as the hotkey for taking screenshots
Well this started about late March but I only noticed it today, I constantly use fraps to check my framerate in games and even when I don't use it I forget to turn it off.
Today I was going to check on my old screenshots and noticed that there are littl... | 3 | 1 | |
1376011473 | 1376070285 | null | t5_2to41 | 122 | sertanli: TIFU by bringing a bag of skittles and arizona iced tea to a work party
We were celebrating bosses birthday and a couple of us were going out to buy some snacks for the party. I went in and bought a huge bag of skittles, some beer and a big, plastic cheezeball barrel. While I was going up to the front, I real... | 5 | 24.4 | |
1376008944 | 1376064695 | null | t5_2to41 | 834 | DramaDramaLlama: TIFU by pissing on my boyfriend
My boyfriend dislocated his knee over the weekend while he was out visiting me (we have a long-distance relationship). Since his knee is mostly okay and we're not about to let some quality bang-time go to waste, we've been coming up with creative positions for sex so tha... | 12 | 69.5 | |
1376017748 | 1376981455 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | yellowsnowstorm: tifu by accidentally stealing a customers meth
I work retail. I hope he doesn't complain.
Duderino316: We need more details.
yellowsnowstorm: There was a guy trying shoes on. He left his keys sitting on the bench the whole time he was shoe shopping and then he disappeared elsewhere in the store while I... | 5 | 0.8 | |
1376029889 | 1376153413 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to clean my keyboard.
So I started to clean my keyboard's insides by taking keys off one-by-one. [The only keys that couldn't somehow come back on were...](http://imgur.com/KXhXAe6)
This is saddening. No more games for me.
(legit, not made up.)
hxcrichard: Line them up properly, press reeee... | 6 | 1.166667 | |
1376022975 | 1376072045 | null | t5_2to41 | 4 | DrAvatar: TIFU by forgetting to change a word in my Cover Letter
I forgot to double check and left the wrong company's name in the body of the letter. Maybe they won't read it closely?
caged_for_ever: aaaaand you're not getting that job.. sorry pal...
DrAvatar: Maybe I didn't want the job subconsciously?
| 3 | 1.333333 | |
1376056505 | 1376093980 | null | t5_2to41 | 919 | heylookbillsonline: TIFU by trying to save 2$ on airport parking
My sister recently took a trip to Cape Cod, but could only find a flight out of a nearby city which was about 2 hours away. She needed a ride because she doesn't have a car so I figured no problem, I'll drive her.
She was set to arrive back yesterday at... | 7 | 131.285714 | |
1376068020 | 1376147937 | t3_1k0vvn | t5_2to41 | 6 | Sykotron: That's my opinion. Unless it's a brand new car or looks like it, I'd just make sure it's road legal and say fuck it. Just bullshit your mother until you're back at school and deal with it next time you're home (bullshit more.)
I don't know your situation, but I wouldn't want to waste so much money on somethi... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1376064029 | 1376075856 | null | t5_2to41 | 20 | ottoscorzato: TIFU by trying to update my company's website
Oh God. There are so many layers to this story. It all started because my boss refuses to accept that our website is relatively easy to navigate and instead insists on trying to search for whatever he's looking for each time he gets on it. But because it's a W... | 4 | 5 | |
1376062630 | 1376318861 | null | t5_2to41 | 17 | kuntslayer: TIFU by blowing pot smoke directly into someones face
So I got a awesome dugout which helps with my public smoking. I like to smoke omw to work, I take the bus. So while I'm walking down the street maybe around 7:40ish am. Bust out my dugout and take a nice long drag, hold it for a few, and blew it out in ... | 11 | 1.545455 | |
1376068120 | 1376261748 | null | t5_2to41 | 86 | this_raccoon: TIFU by implying I have sex dreams featuring Jennifer Lawrence
On a regular basis, I have pretty vivid dreams with a plot and characters and all.
Last week, I had this incredibly complex dream in which I (I'm a girl) had been kidnapped by an underground network that provided sex slaves to the rich and p... | 4 | 21.5 | |
1376073171 | 1376184639 | null | t5_2to41 | 42 | emmattack: TIFU opening my mouth
This happened last night as I was walking home from a friend's house.
There is a trail that leads almost door-to-door to our houses and after a couple of beers, I started my walk home. We had smoked a joint before i left, so i had a good case of dry mouth going on. My nose is a bit stu... | 6 | 7 | |
1376088676 | 1376374081 | null | t5_2to41 | 33 | 132131541654: TIFU by making it very clear to my friend that I have a massive stash of porn
So let's just give a bit of background here, I, like a lot of people, watch porn. The thing is, I have this nice sharp 1080p so I'm not going to watch some crappy low quality video. Instead, I am a member of a couple private tor... | 6 | 5.5 | |
1376091965 | 1376620545 | null | t5_2to41 | 163 | Queen_Of_Farts: TIFU by snarting in class
So I was in chemistry class today, and I was stoked because it was my first class as a senior! Class of 2014, woo! I was all prettied up and dressed in my new school uniform, like in the animes. I was gonna make my last year of high school one to remember!
The teacher gave us ... | 8 | 20.375 | |
1376079791 | 1376340445 | null | t5_2to41 | 7 | edgward: expecting my first business trip to go okay
So I've been working with this company for over 2 years. Almost everyone in my office goes to see clients in different states, I only ever made conference calls, so last week end my boss calls me after 5 on Friday to let me know that I would be going to Connecticut ... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1376094259 | 1376142209 | null | t5_2to41 | 23 | grayspectre: Chatting to my future father in law, made it sound like I was getting in shape to properly decimate his firstborn daughter on our wedding night.
And again on our honeymoon.
>FIL: "You're in good shape! Have you been working out?"
"Yeah, started about 6 months ago. I'm looking to be in the best shape o... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1376095826 | 1376166576 | null | t5_2to41 | 1,496 | BrickTheif: NSFW. tifu with a picture of a seal
WARNING: NSFW
_____________________________________________________________
Okay so today, i was jerking off, and i had just "finished". i exited out, and on the tab below, i had the picture of the seal born at the new england aquarium. (this one: http://i.imgur.com/6Hy... | 12 | 124.666667 | |
1376103005 | 1376148408 | null | t5_2to41 | 59 | rachelraenoel: TIFU... By petting a cow.
Earlier today, I was at the local county fair in the lovely county of Adams in Wisconsin. I was there to enjoy the fair, help out and have a wonderful day. However, later in the afternoon, I found myself in the Rabbit, Chicken, Duck, Goose and Dairy Barn. I was behind a row of r... | 9 | 6.555556 | |
1376102730 | 1376144901 | null | t5_2to41 | 143 | AGameForLosers: TIFU by selling out my son
[Throwaway]
After a long day at work, I came home to my family being gone--cooling off at the public pool. Being the normal "home alone dude", I decided that it's been a while since I've had a good fap. I opened up Chrome, had a decent experience, closed off the tabs, and sat ... | 8 | 17.875 |
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