start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1391238824 | 1391388682 | t3_1wppbh | t5_2to41 | 162 | shakaspeare: TIFU by telling a woman she turned her leg into a giant cock
So a woman was telling me of a problem she had...a swollen leg. She said she had hurt it a few weeks back and put a strap around the knee yesterday while she went to a party. There she enjoyed quite a few alcoholic drinks and today the single leg... | 3 | 54 | |
1391229638 | 1391239648 | t3_1wpf6p | t5_2to41 | 9 | Kelsig: TIFU by ironically copy-pasting Darqwolff's famous copy pasta to a girl I like
[This thing](http://www.reddit.com/r/gaming/comments/sf2e7/i_sent_gabe_newell_a_question_about_what_his_life/c4dmknx)
Anyway we were just being silly by insulting each other. She called me a faggot so I copy-pasted that. She read it... | 3 | 3 | |
1391226502 | 1391294392 | t3_1wpb81 | t5_2to41 | 23 | No_Fruit_Juice: TIFU by having pictures of my 1 year old cousin pooping. (non-explicit)
So I am a newly 18 year old senior in high school. Wooo go me, and I had to print out a worksheet from my email. I ask my physics teacher to allow me to use his printer and the nice guy that he is he allows me, the document is on my... | 4 | 5.75 | |
1391276025 | 1391315159 | t3_1wql2o | t5_2to41 | 3,798 | ntimmel: TIFU: I Accidentally Mocked My Fat Friend
Two friends on my Facebook list have near-identical names; they are literally only one letter off. Both are "Diana K..."
One is a fitness instructor at my gym; the other is an enormous person.
"It's Diana's birthday!" popped up in my feed, and getting confused and th... | 8 | 474.75 | |
1391284806 | 1391304081 | t3_1wqyd8 | t5_2to41 | 70 | Patchoolible: Update: TIFU by leaving all my coursework on the train.
[* Here's my original post *](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/1w1u8i/tifu_by_leaving_all_my_coursework_on_the_train/)
After I'd posted, my teacher emailed me back saying: "Hi X, oh dear! Students have always got them back pretty much. Keep pho... | 4 | 17.5 | |
1391287981 | 1391371714 | t3_1wr3d6 | t5_2to41 | 270 | alittlelamb: TIFU by popping a cyst on my lady parts.
No throwaway because I have no shame.
For the past week I've had a cyst growing on my labia, and it has hurt like a birch. I went to the doctor to make sure I didn't have herpes or something, and she just told me to wait it out until it came to a head so I could d... | 7 | 38.571429 | |
1391282742 | 1391319587 | t3_1wqv3g | t5_2to41 | 69 | ahemdownwardspiral: TIFU by making fun of Down Syndrome in front of a pregnant co-worker
Throwaway because yeah - I fucked up.
I work at a very open company. Everyone considers each other family and likes to joke around a lot and have fun. Conversations in our pod often turn dark and moderately inappropriate - others ... | 8 | 8.625 | |
1391296114 | 1391400881 | t3_1wrfsh | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU by posting a nude picture on snapchat
I was gonna send a naked picture as a joke to my friend, and I accidently double clicked on the bottom that asks if I want to add it on my snapchat timeline. Yup, and It did.
happyazngirl: You can delete snaps from your timeline.
Bagnag: This.
That_Deaf_Guy: Great ... | 5 | 3.4 | |
1391300935 | 1391372340 | t3_1wrn10 | t5_2to41 | 28 | jzoobz: TIFU by eating an entire freezer pizza
It was an hour ago and my stomach stills hurts. I ate fast enough that I didn't realize that I was full until it was too late. I want to poop so badly but I can't. Really put a damper on my evening.
[deleted]: Grow a pair! I eat whole pizzas on the regular and I'm a girl! ... | 4 | 7 | |
1391291634 | 1391437553 | t3_1wr8wk | t5_2to41 | 113 | tifff420: TIFU by accidentally watching hardcore porn with my boss.
I have a boring weekend job dispatching taxis. It's overnight in a pretty upscale suburban neighborhood, so there aren't many phone calls after like 10pm. I usually just bring my laptop to work and watch Netflix or disappear into reddit. Last night ... | 6 | 18.833333 | |
1391286608 | 1391336013 | t3_1wr17y | t5_2to41 | 21 | PleaseLoveMeMeg: TIFU by being an insensitive asshole
(Didn't happen today but I still fucked up) So a while ago I was over at my friends house (we'll call him John) for a little get together. John has a younger brother who has autism and spends the day in a room randomly clicking any video in the suggestions on YouTub... | 3 | 7 | |
1391311080 | 1391447368 | t3_1ws1i7 | t5_2to41 | 87 | BBQasaurus: TIFU by charging face-first into my roommate while naked.
tl;dr: I ran face-first into my roommate while naked, embarrassing the shit out of both of us. Holy shit.
**Some background:**
Today was the first day my town has been active after a huge ice-storm hit our area earlier this week. It was my first ... | 4 | 21.75 | |
1391292107 | 1391318228 | t3_1wr9n1 | t5_2to41 | 39 | TravisL: TIFU by cooking jalapeño poppers
First off, I love spicy foods. A little while ago I decided "Hey, I'm gonna make some bomb-ass bacon wrapped jalapeño poppers." After getting everything together, I looked for some gloves to wear to prepare the peppers. Well shit, no gloves, fuck it I'm hungry. I begin to slice... | 3 | 13 | |
1391309841 | 1391403283 | t3_1wrzrv | t5_2to41 | 27 | WHY_DID_I_FUCK_UP: TIFU by not going to the movie with her
TIFU by not going to a movie with this girl. After a pretty big meet today, we all celebrated by going to a restaurant together as a team. As the meal closed, she went up and jokingly asked if anyone wanted to see a movie with them. Me being myself, I jokingly ... | 4 | 6.75 | |
1391328593 | 1391463602 | t3_1wslzg | t5_2to41 | 171 | soomanyregrets: TIFU by being screwed by genetics then making a mistake
Throw away because of obvious reasons..
So, as a bit of back story, I'm a fairly large guy (6'5", 270ish lbs) who really got screwed over in the dick department. Always been a source of embarrassment but it's rare anyone sees it unless i mean for t... | 11 | 15.545455 | |
1391337957 | 1391353911 | t3_1wsspy | t5_2to41 | 8 | Grillade: TIFU by not taking a photo with my childhood crush
I JUST came back from the cinemas, with my childhood crush.
I immediately knew I fucked up, that's why I came here.
Plus she's the **first** girl I ever picked up with a car.
We had a good time. With the Chinese new year festive season the movies were so p... | 4 | 2 | |
1391343337 | 1391371052 | t3_1wswfq | t5_2to41 | 492 | Disaresta51: TIFU by being a disgustingly perverted friend
**BACKSTORY:** This was about three years ago and recently something brought this back to the surface of my mind. At this time I was a 21 year old male and my friend at the time was a 22 year old female who we will call 'Summer'. In a very short amount of time ... | 8 | 61.5 | |
1391314801 | 1391481800 | t3_1ws6nw | t5_2to41 | 32 | highfivemyself: TIFU by almost setting my house on fire.
I got dinner started in a crockpot and then pushed it to the back of the stove where my toddler couldn't reach it, unknowingly bumping the knobby-thingy and turning on the back burner. I put my kid down for a nap and started working on other housework when I smel... | 8 | 4 | |
1391366553 | 1391398968 | t3_1wtnnn | t5_2to41 | 1,140 | [deleted]: TIFU Because I Sharted Myself LOUD In Church Today
Today, while I was in church, while the sermon was being given, I felt the urge to fart, it felt more like a fart than what it was, a shart. I thought I could just let it out quietly without anyone hearing
I was wrong...
**ruined underwear wrong**
I tried... | 15 | 76 | |
1391369103 | 1391422897 | t3_1wts1n | t5_2to41 | 1,410 | farters_friend: TIFU by laughing at a fart. A man nearly died.
I was at the bus stop with my friend today, telling her about how much I loved Pacific Rim, and how she needs to watch it and she's going to love it because it's the best. Midway through my rant, she told me "Hold on," then looked straight forward, scrunche... | 7 | 201.428571 | |
1391368683 | 1391405238 | t3_1wtrdg | t5_2to41 | 93 | poltermann: TIFU by opening a beer bottle
It's a nice sunday evening and I think it's a good time for a beer. So I grab a bottle of the cool, amber nectar. So where's the opener? No opener here, no opener there. And also I dont wanna use the edge of the furniture because that could leave ugly marks. But wait... there a... | 5 | 18.6 | |
1391376701 | 1391389949 | t3_1wu4x5 | t5_2to41 | 13 | linxmau09: Guys I fucked up really badly.
littlestlaura: I don't know your dad, but are you sure that there's a chance you'll be sent back after the trouble(?) it took to get you to the US? Is it an empty threat? If your dad normally looks after your wellbeing, I have no doubt that you will be just fine.
linxmau09: He... | 7 | 1.857143 | |
1391377866 | 1391408693 | t3_1wu6x8 | t5_2to41 | 318 | fiery-vagina: TIFU and NSFW: I come to you today to explain how I started a fire in my fiancee's vagina
We were cooking earlier, trying to make a lot of deliciousness for the game today. Everything goes well with the chili and the chicken wings. Then came the jalapeno poppers (some of you may already know where this is... | 4 | 79.5 | |
1391377864 | 1391558901 | t3_1wu6x4 | t5_2to41 | 8 | Seveness: TIFU by triggering my girlfriend, a survivor of sexual assault
short version because going into detail isn't something I want to do: College student here, lying with my gf on her bed and having a good time, I start petting her, she says that she doesn't want to do that right now, doesn't know when her roommat... | 9 | 0.888889 | |
1391349719 | 1391381919 | t3_1wt1k1 | t5_2to41 | 56 | bmoriarty87: TIFU: I fell over four rows of people 30 seconds into the Red Hot Chili Peppers
I won tickets to see the Red Hot Chili Peppers last night. I went down with my friend who I don't get to hang out with often. Chili Peppers come out, I rock out a little too hard and end up tumbling down four rows of people.
M... | 5 | 11.2 | |
1391395937 | 1391406341 | t3_1wuy24 | t5_2to41 | -3 | linxmau09: TIFU by being a horny teenager.
(REPOSTED BECAUSE IT GOT DELETED)
So I'm 16 years old. I'm Mexican but live in Austin, Texas. My family and I came here mostly because of the current situation in Mexico and because my parents wanted a better learning experience for my brothers and I. Anyway, I have a girlfri... | 4 | -0.75 | |
1391396495 | 1391398694 | t3_1wuz0w | t5_2to41 | 2 | wikthis: TIFU by liking my friend.
This has been going on over the past 6 months, just for context.
A little bit of background for y'all. Basically I had a friend that I have liked for a long time, we will call her M. Her and I have been great friends and have always been extremely close.
Later on she started datin... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1391395190 | 1391400468 | t3_1wuwu2 | t5_2to41 | 12 | immcatulate: TIFU by cracking a wall at work.
Just an hour ago, I was working in a grocery store. I work in the produce section.
I spot an empty pallet that usually holds boxes of 50lb potatoes that are at the entrance to the produce cooler. Oh shit, I gotta go replace it with a full one.
So I run to the back, grab... | 3 | 4 | |
1391399741 | 1391402924 | t3_1wv47r | t5_2to41 | 11 | Facednectar: TIFU by accidentally mentioning a family member who passed away
Well, it's been a rough couple days for my family and I. My aunt lost her battle in the hospital on friday after being in and out of hospitals for the past few months. I called my grandparents today to see how they were doing and while I was t... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1391402507 | 1391472744 | t3_1wv8kn | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU By locking my friends phone
I was trying to lock my friends phone by entering the wrong password a bunch of times because I thought it would be funny. So it gets locked and he has to login to gmail and whatnot, but it wouldn't let him. So now his phone is locked up and I have to go to the store to get i... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1391402722 | 1391909098 | t3_1wv8wt | t5_2to41 | 97 | I_shit_sideways: TIFU and got shit all over my girlfriend.
Not today, but sharing is caring.
Ok, so I have a colostomy bag. The kind that sticks to your side and casually fills up with poo throughout the day, before being emptied. No bowel movements are involved.
Rewind a couple of months, while I was still getting us... | 6 | 16.166667 | |
1391399250 | 1391463392 | t3_1wv3fs | t5_2to41 | 20 | hahahawhatt: TIFU by having to poop
so i was at a superbowl party and I had to poop bad, so i went in the bathroom. i pulled my pants down, sat on the toilet and started to poop. then i felt my legs getting splattered with something wet. i was thinking "my penis is under the lid, i'm sure of it" and looked down. it was... | 5 | 4 | |
1391412756 | 1391521094 | t3_1wvlks | t5_2to41 | 138 | TIFU_really_bad: TIFU by losing my virginity to a prostitute
Dear reddit.
I really fucked up this time. I'm 21 years old male and I was a virgin. I'm not too bad with girls except I always seem to end up in the friend-zone. Nearly all of my friends weren't virgins and I thought it was nothing special. But I was wrong.
... | 8 | 17.25 | |
1391410255 | 1391472728 | t3_1wvj0z | t5_2to41 | 41 | maddoxfan75: TIFU by pissing the bed and projectile vomiting all over my girlfriend
I had had a lot to drink last night and I decided that I could hold in my piss until the morning (great fucking idea i know). I woke up with one of the biggest puddles of piss i have ever seen right on my bed that pooled around me and m... | 5 | 8.2 | |
1391422400 | 1391461059 | t3_1wvtab | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by not being more careful.
I'll try to make this simple as possible. Pretty much I was in Seattle this night about 2 hours ago and I had my gold chain on. A black man snatched it off my neck and ran off while I tried to catch him, I then caught up to him in an alley and he told me, "do you want to get f... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1391423178 | 1392430477 | t3_1wvtu0 | t5_2to41 | 9 | bighornsredmohawk: TIFU and heightened my creepy reputation
I've done a lot of creepy things by accident because i have depersonalization disorder and I find it difficult to restrain myself or empathize, i guess. so i'm already known as the creepy weird one in my group of friends.
Anyway, I was at a rehearsal for a pl... | 8 | 1.125 | |
1391447074 | 1391459670 | t3_1wwkmr | t5_2to41 | 958 | Ruth_Gordon: TIFU by blowing my nose when I was in a hurry.
Today is Monday, so as a mom of two that means I have to get both of my children ready while they're still trying to be in weekend mode. I have to bring my oldest to school and my youngest to gymnastics.
In typical Monday fashion we all rushed to get out th... | 8 | 119.75 | |
1391449362 | 1391455331 | t3_1wwoj2 | t5_2to41 | 5 | Ryuzaki702: TIFU by letting a relationship go
I'll give you a background the last Sunday i broke up with my gf and two days later i got into a relationship with a amazing girl (i'll call her X) anyway so today i was texting her in class she said we needed to talk i don't lose my cool but i almost did she felt weird abo... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1391452526 | 1391538673 | t3_1wwu4g | t5_2to41 | 430 | [deleted]: TIFU by losing my virginity while blackout drunk
I would like to preface that this actually happened last friday.
I am a girl and I'm nineteen years old. I go to university and I never really felt bad for still having my vcard, never felt the urge to lose it. Then, on friday, me and a couple of friends deci... | 12 | 35.833333 | |
1391457464 | 1391482957 | t3_1wx2vt | t5_2to41 | 4 | Creamballman: TIFU by cheating by accident
the teacher said we can use the answers on out sheet to refer to during a reading check, I thought he said we can refer to the article. I know, I'm a dumbfuck
WPBDoc: Now here's the big question....will you do the honest thing and let the teacher know or will you hide it?
"Ri... | 9 | 0.444444 | |
1391479755 | 1391528789 | t3_1wy5tt | t5_2to41 | 55 | x2doublelift: TIFU by masterbaiting in my brother's room
I am home alone. So I am doing work in my brother's room, which used to be my room before I moved out to college, because that's where the desktop is. 2 Hours into my work session, I get the sensation to release my sexual tension. So I pull up my local porn websi... | 8 | 6.875 | |
1391490674 | 1391567353 | t3_1wy9pi | t5_2to41 | 14 | Foobzy: I bet that kid is thinking, "Mein Kampfy pants!"
dralcax: He's wanted them ever since he was nein years old.
Hawkeye7696: Uh.... Nazi jokes.
| 3 | 4.666667 | |
1391479741 | 1391486377 | t3_1wy5sz | t5_2to41 | 13 | twobobsworth: TIFU changing my passwords to 15 year old E mail accounts while too drunk to remember them.
Dear Yahoo, I know this is going to sound good and stupid. I changed passwords to two old e mail accounts that I hold dear to me, and in each instance my secret phrase is a question that I think I jotted down bla... | 3 | 4.333333 | |
1391488710 | 1391536237 | t3_1wyk41 | t5_2to41 | 163 | [deleted]: TIFU by sending nudes through iCloud to my mom...
So i'm a 16 year old guy who got kinda bored one night. With nothing to do I would normally just head over to reddit, but instead I thought to myself "wouldn't it be a great idea to take some nudes of myself right now?"
Great idea, right guys?
I didn't rea... | 9 | 18.111111 | |
1391489370 | 1391490903 | t3_1wyl3z | t5_2to41 | 5 | sadjkn: By parking in the wrong spot
Foobzy: First world problems. Women are crazy. Etc.
sadjkn: Women are THE first world problem. I wonder if African tribesmen have to deal with woman troubles, that would be a great documentary if they did.
| 3 | 1.666667 | |
1391488398 | 1391573752 | t3_1wyjms | t5_2to41 | 31 | Josh_a_J: TIFU by sticking my finger in my ear.
Well this happened yesterday, but obviously I was not in the mood to write it yesterday considering the situation.
Anyways, my mom works late nights and comes back in the morning, so It's up to me to watch my little brother on weekend mornings. So I decided that we shoul... | 8 | 3.875 | |
1391490317 | 1391568175 | t3_1wymj4 | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by listening to Dre in the shower.
So I live in a pretty modern house with my parents. The whole house has speakers that are hooked up to a central port in the living room so you can listen to the stereo wherever you please. One of the rooms with a speaker is the main bathroom, which I tend to use becau... | 5 | 0.6 | |
1391490292 | 1391573996 | t3_1wymhq | t5_2to41 | 727 | throwawayforgetful: TIFU by forgetting a pad.
All my life I've suffered from horrible periods. I'm talking "murder scene" level and pain galore. Last night I'd been up for 36 hours, was dead tired and just wanted to sleep the pain away.
I went about my night business, brushed my teeth, took something for the pain, pe... | 7 | 103.857143 | |
1391497374 | 1391990629 | t3_1wyvan | t5_2to41 | 169 | cuhrisay: TIFU by putting icy hot on my nipples
TIFU. I dislocated my shoulder a couple days ago snowboarding and right before bed I was put icy hot on it to relieve the pain.
My nipples started itching so naturally, without hesitation, I scratched them. A few minutes later I realize why that was really fucking dumb ... | 7 | 24.142857 | |
1391550962 | 1391551870 | t3_1wz3tp | t5_2to41 | 3 | LRats: The difference is you knew you had to take it with you. I'm pretty sure nothing like that was said between the two. He has been in college for a few years now. It seems like his mom just got tired of taking care of it and gave it away.
The perplexing part is why did OP just seem to be like ok mom. Of course I d... | 3 | 1 | |
1391509531 | 1391527549 | t3_1wz5aa | t5_2to41 | 19 | Eyes_of_ibad: TIFU by venting about my Mom
So last night a dear friend of mine 'Jim' and I are exchanging "parent stories". You know the stories about our parents that drive us nuts and we can't help but talk about it. When it was my turn to share, I focused on my mother and how she tries to put on a mask of perfectio... | 4 | 4.75 | |
1391525569 | 1391569657 | t3_1wzl4z | t5_2to41 | 25 | Twatbag3000: TIFU by trusting a fart.
So... let's restart the counter guys. Sorry.
Let me just note that I've been ill for the past few days as well.
Anyway! Let's got back to 20 mins ago. I've just woken up and I'm fumbling around to find my glasses and phone to have my morning browse on Reddit. Fast forward 5 mins,... | 10 | 2.5 | |
1391530626 | 1391579730 | t3_1wzt1i | t5_2to41 | 251 | sparticle601: TIFU by sitting in Rosa Parks' bus seat
I've been riding the bus to work lately. It all started with my car being stuck in the shop for days waiting for a part. But keep riding since I like not having to deal with the snow and driving in general.
This morning I gave the driver my punch ticket and sat in ... | 6 | 41.833333 | |
1391535726 | 1391566066 | t3_1x01vf | t5_2to41 | 291 | Alexiel17: TIFU by leaving a condom inside a girl
Actually, this happened on saturday (sunday past midnight), but she told me today, I couldn't find the condom the next day, and she said she didn't have it inside (apparently) and today she told me she found it when she was showering, and she's freaking out big time, I'... | 12 | 24.25 | |
1391532826 | 1391945331 | t3_1wzwtp | t5_2to41 | 29 | OneManGOONsquad: TIFU by indirectly getting poop in my mouth
Okay, so I was in the shower, and I was cleaning by butt crack. The thing is, I don't like the idea of contaminating my shower puff so I use my left hand. My logic is that I can wash my hand, so that's all good, right? So anyway, like I said, I was cleanin... | 17 | 1.705882 | |
1391530762 | 1391551632 | t3_1wzt9u | t5_2to41 | 1,344 | kevando: TIFU trying to multi-task
swoosh around mouth wash..
wash my face in the sink
eyes closed, rinse face with water
spit the mouthwash in my hands
rinse face with filtered mouthwash
did I just?
Open eyes
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tl;dr I type with 1 eye this morning
Zib559... | 5 | 268.8 | |
1391540480 | 1391575432 | t3_1x0a9s | t5_2to41 | 41 | sith_macfarlane: TIFU by doing a jig while taking a piss.
Not today, but yesterday nonetheless. I was extremely hyper after finishing my dinner from mcdonalds which included a large soda. I never really drink soda so i'm assuming that is the cause of my hyperness. Either way about 30 minutes after eating i had to piss.... | 3 | 13.666667 | |
1391549212 | 1391613544 | t3_1x0ps3 | t5_2to41 | 29 | [deleted]: TIFU by swimming when I don't know how
In gym class. I was to pre occupied with getting my fat ass body acceptable to take my shirt off, I forgot I didn't know how to swim. I never learned. I'm fucking stupid. The worst goddanmed part is that I struggled right in front of the girl I've been trying to work up... | 4 | 7.25 | |
1391568845 | 1391574639 | t3_1x1ojz | t5_2to41 | 4 | Kaigu3: TIFU by sending my ex-gf hurtful song unintentionally. Proceeded to apologize with second fuck up.
The other day I found a pretty catchy song and it sounds pretty snazzy and I wasn't listening to the lyrics but it's actually condescending.
So, knowing my girlfriend that I had just recently broke up with, I se... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1391569326 | 1391611759 | t3_1x1pek | t5_2to41 | 34 | Boner4Boss: TIFU telling my boss I'm in love with him
So this was actually Saturday, but things are just starting to mull over now, three days later.
I have a HUGE boner for my boss. Major crush. Major major crush. He's 10 years older than me, single, funny, attractive, creative, caring, driven...the whole 9 yards. Ba... | 3 | 11.333333 | |
1391545150 | 1391579129 | t3_1x0if0 | t5_2to41 | 17 | MyCarSmellsLikeBacon: TIFU by kicking a girl in the teeth.
Not really today, more like a few years ago. I used to learn tae kwan do and we were learning some moves. Well there was this move where if someone comes to grab you, you push their body down and kick them in the face. Obviously we didnt really kick them, just ... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1391572659 | 1391576949 | t3_1x1v2d | t5_2to41 | 2 | MikeDJonali: TIFU By Walking into my Teen Son's Bedroom...
It was a normal day, and I got home from work early, so I went to my son's room to see if he was home (he is 14 and takes public transit home). He was not, I assume he was out with friends or something.
Well, I walked in and saw some stuff I wish I hadn't. For... | 5 | 0.4 | |
1391571706 | 1391797151 | t3_1x1tha | t5_2to41 | 19 | nachonaco: TIFU by cleaning out my car.
I almost never clean my car. Horrible, I know, but I never have anyone IN my car and so on and so forth.
The past four months have been kind of stressful and busy and just plain *crazy*.
I, however, decided to get my shit together.
And clean out my car.
I thought I had moved... | 4 | 4.75 | |
1391578544 | 1392185676 | t3_1x242r | t5_2to41 | 17 | ScaryFatMan: TIFU: By leaving my girlfriend's underwear in the living room
So I am finally making progress with my gf's parents, getting to know them, getting friendly, and overall not being seen as a sexual predator who is trying to frisk their daughter...
But one thing led to another, and we did the naughty naughty ... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1391582964 | 1391583376 | t3_1x29xn | t5_2to41 | 115 | [deleted]: TIFU by masturbating with pepper spray
This happened about 6 years ago, but it's still a true story and hope it does well. Anywho..
This was back when I was a junior in HS and I lived with my mom at the time in a town home/neighborhood. I get home from school one day and the door to get from the garage to i... | 3 | 38.333333 | |
1391586629 | 1391617726 | t3_1x2e25 | t5_2to41 | 15 | Not_Reliable: TIFU by committing one of the worst accidental instagram likes possible
Allow me to set the scene
Middle of the afternoon, alone in my room, and my best friends mom uploads a picture to instagram. She is totally like 50 but whatever it gets me in the mood.
So I'm choking the chicken looking through a... | 4 | 3.75 | |
1391586559 | 1391657985 | t3_1x2dy9 | t5_2to41 | 97 | kirbygay: TIFU by fucking up cream puffs......
I work at a bakery in a grocery store, doing packaging. Today, my boss left me a case of cream puffs to package and store in the freezer. She left a binder with details on how to make it.
Apparently, you are supposed to slice the pastry in half (the god damn book said ... | 3 | 32.333333 | |
1391600985 | 1391696383 | t3_1x2q8k | t5_2to41 | 1,836 | evaumanex: TIFU by blowing air on a spider.
This morning I woke up to see a pretty sizeable spider chillin on my ceiling. I wasn't sure if it was alive or not, so I huffed and I puffed and I blew my morning breath all over that fucker. Worst idea ever.
Next thing I know, the little bugger dropped from its web DIRECTLY... | 18 | 102 | |
1391602991 | 1391816831 | t3_1x2s3x | t5_2to41 | 59 | boardgamejoe: TIFU by going grocery shopping.
This morning my wife wanted me to go get some groceries, so I loaded up our 2 year old and headed to our Walmart Supercenter. It had recently sleeted and snowed on top of the sleet, but the roads were pretty clear so I decided it would be ok to drive.
As I turn into the Wa... | 17 | 3.470588 | |
1391605351 | 1391615230 | t3_1x2uf6 | t5_2to41 | 85 | shitonmydickandnips: TIFU by eating some beans.
I'm currently writing this bed-stricken, cold, and shaky after what can only be described as the lowest point of the last 5 years, if not 10.
It all began with food, as you'd expect. This particular food was leftover taco meat in a tortilla with some refried beans that I... | 5 | 17 | |
1391607491 | 1391709258 | t3_1x2wrx | t5_2to41 | 47 | MikeyMunnyshot: TIFU making breakfast
So I was making breakfast. Sunny side up eggs, toast, bacon, and sausage. I cracked the first egg and from moving my hand from the plate I cracked it on to the skillet, the egg slips out and lands on the stove. Of course I didn't see this happened and had a mind fuck moment where I... | 4 | 11.75 | |
1391601425 | 1391648775 | t3_1x2qm2 | t5_2to41 | 4 | roberta60: TIFU being mean to a blind person...
I rode the bus to work this morning. It was almost full. the woman sitting in front of me made no attempt to move her purse and move over for people who needed to sit down. I thought she was just a self-absorbed selfish person. I pondered the psychology of self-ab... | 4 | 1 | |
1391613947 | 1391717878 | t3_1x35v4 | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by having a great night out with the girl I'm in love with. Or so I thought. (warning: long rant)
**Just noticed the second part of the title doesn't really make sense. Whoops!**
I was (am) pretty much in love, I think, with this girl. We had some history, we dated, then I fucked up after which, unexpe... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1391616504 | 1392001443 | t3_1x3a93 | t5_2to41 | 101 | Dende1127: TIFU by talking to my now Ex GF's parents about us moving into our own place.
Ok so this didn't happen last night, it was on 2/1/14. Back story is two weeks ago my best friends 15 year old little brother who I have known since he was 8 hung himself with a necktie. I am 23 years old and this news absolutely c... | 9 | 11.222222 | |
1391622671 | 1391759472 | t3_1x3lgt | t5_2to41 | 100 | squirt-verduras: TIFU by sneezing on my period
I am on my period and have a cold. I was in the bathroom getting ready to take a shower so I was completely naked. I sneezed and blood (the mucus kind) basically shot out of my who-ha and went all down my legs and all over the rug. Kind of horrific, mostly impressive.
skat... | 7 | 14.285714 | |
1391637605 | 1391878056 | t3_1x4dq2 | t5_2to41 | 30 | ODSTALCAPWNED: TIFU by wearing a neon green shirt.
I was getting dressed. I just woke up and was still pretty tired, and didn't feel like picking out an outfit. So I just grabbed the first things I saw, which was a pair of sweatpants and an ugly, bright neon green shirt. Were there other shirts? sure, and if I felt lik... | 5 | 6 | |
1391649586 | 1391651895 | t3_1x4yyq | t5_2to41 | 12 | Archdemonic: TIFU By Getting Mildly Intoxicated With Alcohol and Getting Into An Altercation, This Was Last Night, but It's Pretty Big, Mostly Because The Cops Intervened A Little
You see, normally, I don't drink alcohol, usually. My best friend from freaking Junior High, well he just got dumped and he was upset, it wa... | 3 | 4 | |
1391652727 | 1391789072 | t3_1x54b9 | t5_2to41 | 447 | [deleted]: TIFU by screaming "NO" to my girlfriend.
Alright, so, my girlfriend and I are into some pretty kinky play. We're both versatile so sometimes she's the dominant one, other times I'm the dominant one. It's turned out to be very good for our sex life.
Now, we both moved in together two weeks ago and the house ... | 13 | 34.384615 | |
1391635314 | 1391731895 | t3_1x49f9 | t5_2to41 | 37 | Roark_Laughed: TIFU trying to remove cookie crumbs from my keyboard.
Today is Wednesday which also means it's cheat day so as a reward to myself for working out all week and sticking with my cut diet I purchased myself a nice delicious warm peanut butter cookie from my favorite bakery.
Normally I eat snacks while dri... | 3 | 12.333333 | |
1391658095 | 1391664370 | t3_1x5dgy | t5_2to41 | 11 | rocketman500: TIFU by microwaving a bag of hot cheetos
Hey reddit I f'd up. I bought a bag of hot cheetos earlier. I live in a dorm if that adds any context, but I digress. I put the cheetos in the microwave just for storage because you don't put them in the refrigerator . So just about thirty minutes ago I come back ... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1391666560 | 1391819114 | t3_1x5q8d | t5_2to41 | 283 | [deleted]: TIFU by spilling paint in my girlfriend's car.
I helped my girlfriend buy her first car recently, and I'm teaching her to drive. I've been borrowing the car for the past month for a few reasons.
She's a very clean person. She throws a fit when I leave crumbs on the floor. I can't even leave a damned gatorad... | 7 | 40.428571 | |
1391687602 | 1391696610 | t3_1x68wg | t5_2to41 | 253 | Rodondo1: TIFU by reading a dream journal of a classmate
HardKnockRiffe: Why did you continue to read it aloud? You got through all three dreams aloud before realizing maybe you shouldn't have done it? You didn't fuck up, you're just an asshole.
Rodondo1: They told me to continue, it was either me continuing or they'd... | 10 | 25.3 | |
1391716864 | 1391735325 | t3_1x7fvo | t5_2to41 | 212 | CrystalValkyrie: TIFU with ether
So this is my boss' and my TIFU. Not all my fault.
It is very cold in Wyoming right now, -35* this morning. I work on a ranch, and our work trucks are old. I got there at 8, and went to start the hay truck we use to to feed the horses with. It turned over, but wouldn't catch. My boss ... | 5 | 42.4 | |
1391716808 | 1391800004 | t3_1x7fra | t5_2to41 | 1,294 | porcubot: TIFU realized an hour late I was scheduled to work today
I work part-time at a retailer, and somehow I had convinced myself that I was scheduled to work tomorrow, not today. I always take pictures of the schedule on my phone, so when I checked to see when I was working tomorrow I realized my mistake an hour t... | 13 | 99.538462 | |
1391721434 | 1391731555 | t3_1x7o7s | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU, I Made The Cliche Mistake They Make in Horror Movies of Going Into the Woods AT NIGHT It REALLY Hit the Fan
Me and my friend were just hanging out, and I swear we heard a really loud, **"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH"** coming from the woods, we both were startled, and of course we were curious. It sounded like a wo... | 5 | 0.4 | |
1391731594 | 1391883701 | t3_1x86gr | t5_2to41 | 341 | TipMeDogeCoin: TIFU: by standing in line behind a mannequin
So today I went shopping at my local mall. I saw a Hollister store and since I've never been to one I decided to try it out. I was immediately surprised by the lighting of the store and was slightly confused. I picked out a couple of items and went to the chec... | 4 | 85.25 | |
1391734777 | 1391825823 | t3_1x8bru | t5_2to41 | 24 | momsdayprepper: TIFU by posting a nude to Snapchat Story instead of having it deleted it.
So to preface this, me and this girl have been talking for about a month or so. She's pretty great, although she's very sensitive about her body. Not that she isn't confident, just that she's very touchy on pictures and doesn't li... | 4 | 6 | |
1391735724 | 1391744970 | t3_1x8ddb | t5_2to41 | 58 | shouldoffinishedhim: TIFU by smacking-down a co-worker.
Throwaway account.
So a couple of people from my work have been bullying me for a while, A lot of verbal abuse mostly, picking on me for my age, previous jobs, my height. (I'm smaller than the average guy yea but I'm no midget for fuck sake!!) Unfortunately there... | 6 | 9.666667 | |
1391735594 | 1391887211 | t3_1x8d5f | t5_2to41 | 106 | nexisfan: TIFU by counter-sexually harassing my boss
Should probably use a throwaway, but eh, living on the edge.
Today as I walked past my boss, who is the owner of the firm I work for, I heard him kind of mumble out loud to himself, "I will slap your ass" ... as in, slap my actual ass. Not "I WILL slap yo ass" if y... | 5 | 21.2 | |
1391735577 | 1391800542 | t3_1x8d42 | t5_2to41 | 220 | stevierar: TIFU by inventing a rule in "King of Drinking"
(You may know it as "King's Cup" (there is an /r/AskReddit thread that reminded me; this happened a few months ago but I didn't know /r/tifu existed then) or by another name; a drinking game where each card has a different rule you must complete if you draw it).... | 6 | 36.666667 | |
1391742570 | 1391815883 | t3_1x8omv | t5_2to41 | 1 | [deleted]: TIFU by not recognizing my Redditor friend.
Earlier today I told a friend of mine about a subreddit I was starting (shameless /r/whiteblack promotion). He browses Reddit frequently. I totally forget about this happening.
Later that day, while browsing reddit, I refresh the subreddit to see a new post. This ... | 3 | 0.333333 | |
1391762850 | 1391766631 | t3_1x9d7j | t5_2to41 | -12 | Ghost17088: TIFU by not migrating my E-mail account to Office365
I'm a graduate student and a grad assistant at a university and while this fuck up happened a month ago, I only realized it today.
A couple months back, the school sent out an E-mail to everyone stating that they were migrating all school E-mail accounts... | 6 | -2 | |
1391752553 | 1391975727 | t3_1x9376 | t5_2to41 | 519 | themadhetter: TIFU when I ran over myself
Today I went to stop my car real quickly and I put it into reverse instead of park got out. i thought It was rolling so I tried to stop it, I got pinned to the car behind me and made a dent in his car, tore my calf, and all my friends think I am a shitty driver
a_magic_wizard:... | 9 | 57.666667 | |
1391787589 | 1391831478 | t3_1xa08r | t5_2to41 | 749 | MyButtIsCold_AMA: TIFU by being a commuter student
I am a freshman in college, currently in my second semester. I go to the college of my hometown, roughly a 10 minute drive, so I'm still living at home with family to save money. I travel to school by the town's bus, which offers free travel to students with their IDs.... | 6 | 124.833333 | |
1391793855 | 1391901732 | t3_1xaa89 | t5_2to41 | 39 | stufoor: TIFU apparently its not ok to say gay people shouldn't be assaulted
Last night my nut job father "eliminated" me from his Facebook, as he put it, and said that I was going to hell, god was going to kick my ass, and that I didn't know what the word pervert even meant.
Really fucked up this time guys. /s
Edit... | 6 | 6.5 | |
1391802172 | 1391825884 | t3_1xaob5 | t5_2to41 | 33 | throwawaywhathtefuck: TIFU by telling a very close friend whos in love with me to kill themselves
Throwaway for obvious reasons.
So last night I came home after nearly getting into a car accident twice. I was shaken up and upset, plus dealing with other friends had already upset me. My dad had also been yelling a ton ... | 3 | 11 | |
1391807689 | 1391837385 | t3_1xaxqw | t5_2to41 | 92 | [deleted]: TIFU by doing meth again.
A week ago I tried it at a friends house, and ended up hating it because of how bad it made me feel afterwards. Then again, today, I tried it again after getting drunk. I don't even know why I tried it.
TheUprightMan: Because you're developing an addiction to meth maybe?
gartloneyr... | 6 | 15.333333 | |
1391808947 | 1391817334 | t3_1xazwb | t5_2to41 | 116 | thislifeisanew: TIFU by trying to be attractive
There I was, about to go out dancing. (Context) I have three wood steps going down from my front door, it was raining. There are apartment buildings in front on my town house. One of my neighbors (very attractive group of guys my age) has a balcony that looks right at my ... | 5 | 23.2 | |
1391815685 | 1391853622 | t3_1xbay0 | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU buying audio equipment.
TL;DR- I blew $250 on the wrong speaker and It's all my fault.
I'm still living with my parents, and, if I want to buy anything, I have to come up with the money myself. I'm a pretty square guy, so any quick and dirty (read: illegal) options are out of the window.
I did some ve... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1391814639 | 1391887000 | t3_1xb9d4 | t5_2to41 | 15 | Noceus: TIFU got caught by cops with weed, and now I need to tell my parents
So me and my friend were caught today by two cops with under a gram of weed, and got a 40€ citation. Since I'm only 18 and still life with my parents I need to tell them. How do I even begin to approach them so I can tell them? Can you please ... | 6 | 2.5 |
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