start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1395357432 | 1395431823 | t3_20y59v | t5_2to41 | 48 | speedwithteeth: TIFU by drinking too much
Got invited to a dude's place to chill. It was a whole group of people I'd never met before, including the dude whose apartment I was at. Now, I'm not a drinker at all, but I figured I'd try to impress the guy by matching shots with him. Ended up having nine shots of brandy in ... | 5 | 9.6 | |
1395358853 | 1395419320 | t3_20y7q8 | t5_2to41 | 48 | TonySPhillips: TIFU by leaving kids behind
I help run a kids' theatre troupe. Usually there is another adult and myself running rehearsals. Today I called rehearsal early due to parent teacher conferences.
I let a few of the kids use my phone to call their parents to get rides home. One set of kids said they'd be alr... | 4 | 12 | |
1395363829 | 1395552362 | t3_20yfmr | t5_2to41 | 7 | Lycopenis: TIFU by realizing I sold my old computer that had back ups of all my virtual machines.
Yup, I didn't even know about this subreddit. I literally just googled "I fucked up" and this popped up if that shows you how fucking fuckin fucked I am right now.
I am towards the end of my semester and everything was go... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1395370593 | 1395470616 | t3_20yqir | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by telling my girl friend I'm Gay
So back story, I have this inside joke with a lot of friends, in which we tend to say "I'm Gay" in various locations. Normally if you do it in public places its like more points.
So, I had my girl friend at my apartment today, and my friend from Kansas is heading to S... | 5 | 1.4 | |
1395371522 | 1395423363 | t3_20yrwf | t5_2to41 | 29 | I_am_Tre: TIFU by fucking up typing
Thought I typed in reddit.com/r/TIFU. Typed reddit.com/r/YIFU instead. I need eye-bleach. For those thinking about checking it out. Don't. Seriously.
Thadine: I'm very curious, however I don't want to click the link.
What's there? Anyone who was brave enough to look want to explain?... | 5 | 5.8 | |
1395411540 | 1395423199 | t3_20yovw | t5_2to41 | 21 | slipuke: What if OP is Latvian
poggle101: Potatoes don't grow on trees you know. Use teabags.
Bitch_Karma: treebags
| 3 | 7 | |
1395372298 | 1395986566 | t3_20yt0p | t5_2to41 | 89 | TheJackal8: Quick reminder: Your story doesn't have to have happened today.
The sub is called TIFU but that's just a name, the story you post can be from any time. You still have to start the title with "TIFU" but other than that, your post won't be removed for not being from today. We do encourage people to post stori... | 4 | 22.25 | |
1395382070 | 1395460596 | t3_20z4z2 | t5_2to41 | 9 | Eddie07: TIFU While asking a friend about her TIFU. Who actually TIFU'ed ?
After being fascinated by the TIFU subreddit, I asked a friend over text message what was one of her TIFU's. I tell her what it stands for but she doesn't understand. Then I spoon feed the meaning. After a moment without receiving or sending any... | 4 | 2.25 | |
1395406794 | 1395493995 | t3_20zpmo | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by attempting to install a custom ROM onto my uncle's phone.
Today, I fucked up by attempting to install [Cyanogenmod](http://www.reddit.com/r/cyanogenmod) and ended up bricking the phone? (I don't know if it was actually a hard brick).
No matter what I did and tried. The phone wont turn on. I tried HE... | 5 | 2.8 | |
1395421612 | 1395525953 | t3_210cby | t5_2to41 | 11 | ThePlebScrib: TIFU By emailing my teacher an assignment with a rather inappropriate title
So we were told to make a slideshow type project in my careers class and it would be our big project. I (Generally I think all schoolwork is beneath me) laugh at its simplicity and put it off for 3 or so weeks until the night its ... | 6 | 1.833333 | |
1395421447 | 1395471907 | t3_210c26 | t5_2to41 | 2,905 | adelaideanne: TIFU by touching my junk
Ok, so this isn't actually about me, but my boyfriend.
Last night he was helping me put a salsa together for a party we're having at work today when I asked him if we had any disposable gloves so I could chop a jalapeno. He laughed and said "you don't need gloves for that!" I ex... | 14 | 207.5 | |
1395426266 | 1395504448 | t3_210k4g | t5_2to41 | 22 | Donk_Pocket: TIFU by trying to fix my speakers
About an hour ago I tried to plug in my [awesome light up dancing water speakers](http://lghttp.5804.nexcesscdn.net/8047E9/magento/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/1000x/403afce16db1dead1ca56485b7ef5a5c/b/l/black_speakers_2_1.jpg) but I realized that one of the USB port... | 3 | 7.333333 | |
1395429659 | 1395462744 | t3_210pmd | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by having a car without knowing stuff.
This is more like a week ago that it happened, but I still feel awful about it and I'm still freaking out.
So, a little over a month ago I got this fantastic car. Sweet color, nice brakes, super nice sound system, fancy little switch to turn on a black light wher... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1395433678 | 1395435703 | t3_210w2s | t5_2to41 | 89 | The4aK3AzN: TIFU by getting a divorce
**This is not my personal fuck up, I suggested that the OP x-post to here but it's been 12 hours and this one... well it was made for this sub**
>My ex and I had broken up and she decided to get an apartment 30 minutes away from where our apartment was. It's probably for the be... | 4 | 22.25 | |
1395440367 | 1395452504 | t3_2116pc | t5_2to41 | 102 | syruup: TIFU by laying down on the couch
I really shouldn't have lain down. I had some work I needed to get done but didn't wanna do and the Universe made me pay for it.
My dog likes to lounge across the top of the couch and look out the window. My toddler likes to sit in my lap. Everyone looked comfy so I leaned back... | 4 | 25.5 | |
1395438240 | 1395452669 | t3_21139s | t5_2to41 | 11 | Sphigmomanometer: TIFU by standing up too quickly, passing out, and cutting my face open.
(This happened last night, but it was after midnight so technically today I guess.)
I was sitting on the couch playing [Wild Arms 3](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wild_Arms_3) and smoking some weed. I decided to get up and light ... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1395447863 | 1395470140 | t3_211hg2 | t5_2to41 | 35 | meepsiclemckitten: TIFU by trusting a fart
Today I join the TIFU club. Throwaway for obvious reasons. Before I start, let me give some relevant background. Also, I apologize for the long tale, scroll down for TL/DR.
I am visiting my girlfriend at my alma mater and staying with her in her dorm room. For the past few m... | 3 | 11.666667 | |
1395457937 | 1395466768 | t3_211v0v | t5_2to41 | 10 | gijoe383: TIFU by smoking too hard.
So a budy of mine and myself had my house to myself and since I've never smoked weed before, he thought it would be a great idea to get me high. He had his dab(?) rig with him so we were going to hit that. So it gets to be my turn and he picks me off this massive dab. It was about th... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1395461480 | 1395466561 | t3_211z4g | t5_2to41 | 19 | [deleted]: TIFU by leaving my work VPN while I watched multiple videos of porn for the last 3 hours.
I pretty much watched all of the genres, im pretty sure im fucked.
Theonlymatt: 3 minutes?
helpprogram2: 3 hours.
yellowtag: If I were your boss, I wouldn;t even be mad. That's an impressive amount of stamina
| 4 | 4.75 | |
1395471748 | 1395472998 | t3_2128tk | t5_2to41 | 21 | [deleted]: TIFU by drinking an herbal remedy
Hi Reddit, I'm a 23/m living in the caribbean, this becomes relevant later on. So my father is second generation chinese and he believes in boiling [bitter melon](https://www.google.com/search?q=bitter+melon&safe=off&rlz=1C1SKPL_en-GBTT449&espv=210&es_sm=122&... | 6 | 3.5 | |
1395480627 | 1396252340 | t3_212eei | t5_2to41 | 58 | ponchacito: Today I not only shit myself, but also peed myself.
So last night I ate Panda Express (really bad 'chinese' food) ...today I was at work, walking around when I realized I had to poop. Oh okay, I'm off in 30 minutes I can wait till then I thought. Five minutes later, no ponchacito, you're gonna poop right no... | 5 | 11.6 | |
1395470075 | 1396052029 | t3_2127hm | t5_2to41 | 44 | Omgcorgitracks: TIFU by dumpster diving at gamestop.
About an hour ago me and my sister were out so I said "hey let's stop by GameStop" so I could see if they threw away electronics as they sometimes do, as I approached the garbage can I noticed it was locked and also I had no flashlight, so I used my phone, as I'm loo... | 6 | 7.333333 | |
1395486053 | 1395597912 | t3_212hl7 | t5_2to41 | 67 | Photoasscopy: TIFU by scanning my ass and sending it to workmates, boss and family
So we had an office party the other day to celebrate the companies 20 year anniversary and drunk me decided to photocopy my ass (because apparently that is common)
At work we have this system where you have to swipe your ID card in orde... | 4 | 16.75 | |
1395487804 | 1395606727 | t3_212ip4 | t5_2to41 | 90 | radishinyourshoe: TIFU by trying to multitask in the bathroom
Well yesterday morning i FU. I thought i'd try and save time by putting away toiletries whilst peeing (they go on a shelf in the window behind the toilet). Somehow I managed to knock everything over, including the pot with the toothbrushes in. I hear a splas... | 5 | 18 | |
1395493851 | 1395498166 | t3_212n73 | t5_2to41 | 62 | PlopKitties: TIFU by brushing my teeth.
Some daily background. I've been feeling sort of sick all day. A queezy feeling I get from too much tomato based products. Anyway, I eat half a flatbread pizza from subway, and have a pie ala mode with three scoops of vanilla. Oh good god the sweet joy. I paid dearly for it, as p... | 6 | 10.333333 | |
1395494564 | 1395700120 | t3_212nut | t5_2to41 | 40 | pfeper: TIFU by not bring extra pants when taking my toilet-training son to lunch.
So technically it was yesterday. I took my sons to lunch. My 2.5 year old son is toilet training and still accident prone. During lunch he said, "I peed." And it wasn't just a little bit.
I went to the diaper bag and found clean underw... | 10 | 4 | |
1395513706 | 1395534284 | t3_212zeb | t5_2to41 | 138 | ArrrghZombies: How do you do this?
Raticide: Just follow the intuitive Metro interface prompts and I'm sure you'll find it.
Discrete_Number: > Just follow the intuitive Metro interface prompts and I'm s
"intuitive"
Aphoristic: [Indeed](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xECUrlnXCqk)
accountofgod: what a fucking idiot... | 13 | 10.615385 | |
1395508268 | 1395528363 | t3_213346 | t5_2to41 | 3 | Throwcrastinator: TIFU by flipping the bird
I was at a debate, talking about something when, for some reason, my middle finger sort of spasmed and stuck out. The chairperson lashed out at me, and despite my claims that it was an accident, well, you know what happened.
Omgili: What happened?
lostdeceiver: He lost the d... | 3 | 1 | |
1395533823 | 1395650788 | t3_21433h | t5_2to41 | 175 | vikingnurse: TIFU by not turning off sharing on my laptop the night before, sharing porn with an entire nursing school[NSFW?]
Allrighty, this actually happened some years ago, but anyway.
I was a senior nursing student, and having just bought a new laptop a few days earlier I had to share files (including a few pornos)... | 5 | 35 | |
1395537034 | 1396036253 | t3_21477t | t5_2to41 | 64 | HoneyBearTaco: TIFU by hooking up with a drunk girl and waking up with gumballs
Early this morning / late last night a girl I know came over to mess around for a while and spend the night. We got into it, and eventually moved into the infamous 69 position. While we were going at it, the girl, who had been originally ch... | 9 | 7.111111 | |
1395550753 | 1395631012 | t3_214nzr | t5_2to41 | 1,272 | nolabella77: TIFU by opening my fiancé's certified letter from the IRS.
Nagaempress: I think that was HIS fuck up. Not that he had the kid. But that he never told you before getting as far as you have.
[deleted]: She is a fiance not a girlfriend. I have no issue with her opening that mail.
evildonald: ESPECIALLY if... | 10 | 127.2 | |
1395548759 | 1395645363 | t3_214lsb | t5_2to41 | 39 | SoylentGreenMuffins: TIFU by forgetting I had an online class
I'm currently enrolled in an online class that is one of a few classes that determine if I get into the career field I want to pursue. Unfortunately for me, I tend to forget things. After the first few units, I completely forgot that I was enrolled. Today, I... | 4 | 9.75 | |
1395553022 | 1395598854 | t3_214q7b | t5_2to41 | 94 | RandomFreakout: TIFU by not deleting my porn and my video of me and my gf masturbating
So a few months ago I gave my laptop to my cousin because it was broken and my mother insisted that my cousin should fix it so we can save money. It had this problem where the screen is just black.
Today my aunt came by to bring bac... | 3 | 31.333333 | |
1395548218 | 1395690935 | t3_214l65 | t5_2to41 | 19 | Corryvrecken: TIFU by trying to double click my heels
So last night was my birthday. I'm Phoenix for work and everyone kept saying that Mill Ave was the place to be. So a group of colleagues took me out. Didn't buy a single drink. Got hammered. All in all a great night. So as we were walking back to the car my friend s... | 3 | 6.333333 | |
1395555219 | 1395609777 | t3_214s53 | t5_2to41 | 457 | handcuffedhousewife: TIFU by flashing the FedEx driver.
I took advantage of the early spring weather on Friday. Temps were nearly 70, and after this shit winter, it felt like a mid-summer day. Kids weren't home, husband was at work, I had nothing but free time. I decided it would be a perfect time to work on an early t... | 12 | 38.083333 | |
1395548382 | 1395591171 | t3_214lcz | t5_2to41 | 103 | buttpluginmybathroom: TIFU by accidentally showing a 7yr old boy porn on TV.
I'm babysitting my friends kid tonight, and before they left, they said we could watch some TV and explained that there was a movies area with stuff they've PVR'ed. Later on and thinking nothing of it, I am sitting with the kid on the couch (w... | 5 | 20.6 | |
1395562286 | 1395642749 | t3_214xjf | t5_2to41 | 14 | derpfacemcg33: TIFU by sleeping in on my mom's birthday
so for the past couple of years, i've had a really bad habit of sleeping through a lot of important things that are in the morning.. and i thought i had beat it but apparently not. my parents and i have had a great relationship for the past couple of months after ... | 5 | 2.8 | |
1395571635 | 1395573378 | t3_2152wy | t5_2to41 | 7 | threeinchesofpain: By essentially sucking off another male.
rhonx2: you didn't answer the question though... how did it taste?
threeinchesofpain: To be completely honest, whilst I was hooking up with her, I thought she had just recently brushed her teeth, although the toothpaste just tasted strange. Immediately afterw... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1395571419 | 1395618040 | t3_2152t1 | t5_2to41 | 9 | Spicypickels: tifu by not doing anything
Tonight stared off with me and my buddies and some random people drinking in a dorm and having fun pregaming. We went out to a party and everyone was dancing and drinking and it was pretty great had a blast. When we got back we were all chillin again, and these two girls , easil... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1395574969 | 1395582636 | t3_2154w8 | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by saying something creepy to a girl.
So I'm talking to this really cool girl who I enjoy talking to. I ask her what her plans for the day were and she told me and lastly she asked what I was going to do, I told her what I was going to do but I decided to throw in a joke on the last line on the list. Th... | 6 | 1.5 | |
1395579415 | 1395583434 | t3_2158ba | t5_2to41 | 22 | Torchbug: TIFU by sounding like a rapist
I was walking home from work at 12:10am. It was pitch black, and I was unfortunate enough to catch a woman walking home in front of me too. It was dead quiet and about a minute later she exclaims out of nervousness, "bloody hell, that's a fast walk". I am tall so naturally I hav... | 3 | 7.333333 | |
1395588361 | 1395590798 | t3_215hhw | t5_2to41 | 2 | KristyConfused: TIFU shaving NOT in the shower
So today I decided I'd give my Lady Remington a full-body trial. I skipped the genital region, but I got everywhere else.
Face: As good as a blade, which is to say, not as good as I'd like but nothing I can do about that. Plus side: no cuts, which I can't say for the razo... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1395594832 | 1395608639 | t3_215qeh | t5_2to41 | 9 | trappedlikeafingrat: TIFU by falling into a trap
So I live in Canada and that's kind of important. Anyway, I was at school today walking with my friends. We went down three hallways and two staircases on our way to class, then I had to go to the bathroom while everyone else went to class.
I came down the flights of st... | 3 | 3 | |
1395562212 | 1395753447 | t3_214xho | t5_2to41 | 35 | Throwatampon: TIFU and exposed my used tampon to a customer.
So TIFU and showed a customer my used tampon. First of all it was wrapped in toilet paper and I'm not 100% sure if they saw any blood. Sorry for the wall of text.
So I was at work today and I have my period. I took my lunch break and went to the toilet to c... | 8 | 4.375 | |
1395600359 | 1395615593 | t3_215ywv | t5_2to41 | 73 | leaveitbe12: TIFU by having a threesome with my friend and her boyfriend
Throwaway..here it goes.
Last night I went hangout with my friend. We started to drink at her place and her boyfriend invited us to a party. Drank even more at the party and went to a bar afterwards and drank even more. Since her bf's place was re... | 4 | 18.25 | |
1395608678 | 1395697075 | t3_2161zr | t5_2to41 | 356 | fruitellla: For real. I don't know why this option always gets thrown out so fast. Communication is like a super power once you know how to do it well.
Bodilis: Because he likely already/subconsciously knows that she doesn't reciprocate his feelings, and that a conversation about this could likely lead to the end of th... | 14 | 25.428571 | |
1395603806 | 1395607489 | t3_21649v | t5_2to41 | 29 | Raiden_Gekkou: TIFU by getting banned
This happened a few months ago. I was on /r/TumblrInAction reading a thread about Chanty Morris, the well-known, red-headed feminist activist, also known as Big Red. Someone didn't know what her name was, and was too lazy to simply google "big red feminist", or to look at her youtu... | 8 | 3.625 | |
1395616151 | 1395994037 | t3_216nna | t5_2to41 | 1,592 | virgyboo22: TIFU by trying to steal "weed" brownies from my dad
**FINAL EDIT:** I'm putting this one at the top to save all new readers some confusion: I'm a girl. Read this in a girls voice. Nobody realized I was female until they got to my first edit.
So my dad and I are both stoners. We're also both aware of our r... | 9 | 176.888889 | |
1395618071 | 1395727486 | t3_216qlz | t5_2to41 | 88 | [deleted]: TIFU by trying to defy a racial stereotype
**Context:**
When I started high school, I had never really played a sport before. I had tried out for soccer, basketball, and pretty much everything else when I was younger, however I simply could not compete because I was un-athletic. I was told by my peers that ... | 4 | 22 | |
1395619657 | 1395725591 | t3_216t1v | t5_2to41 | 213 | EPosc: TIFU by pinching my boyfriend's dick.
So I'm lying on the couch watching reddit tv, and my boyfriend decided that it would be funny to rest his dink on my head. I reached up and pinched the tip, and out of surprise he dribbled pee onto my face. It almost went in my mouth.
trav1th3rabb1: Could've been worse.
EPo... | 5 | 42.6 | |
1395605745 | 1395696326 | t3_2167em | t5_2to41 | 20 | iwaswaiting: TIFU by adopting a scarf
If you work in the kind of place that has a lost and found, you are probably aware of the fact that something like 90% of the items are never claimed. What happens to those items? Well, at my place of employment, they are either donated to thrift stores or adopted by employees afte... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1395621888 | 1395629458 | t3_216wfo | t5_2to41 | 93 | DoctorDratini: TIFU By getting a split stream
So this morning I got up really tired and having to piss. My dick being hard as a rock, I went into the bathroom and got the toilet seat up. But my cat followed me into the bathroom and hopped up onto the back of the toilet. He meowed at me, and I was used to it so I didn't... | 3 | 31 | |
1395630439 | 1395720448 | t3_21794k | t5_2to41 | 38 | Hbeeman: TIFU by thinking i was home alone
So the day started out with me sleeping in. My dad and stepbrother went to some mag con or something like that. I thought they left leaving me home alone.
Well I get a bit horny in the morning so I started watching some porn. I'm a girl so my step brother walks in my room se... | 7 | 5.428571 | |
1395638210 | 1395949034 | t3_217j0g | t5_2to41 | 113 | speedwithteeth: TIFU by making my family think I was dead
This actually happened around when I was around 8 or 9 years old, but it was a big enough fuckup that I've remembered it all these years.
I was in my grandparents' backyard playing with the hose. They had one of those attachments that goes over the nozzle of t... | 7 | 16.142857 | |
1395664831 | 1395680107 | t3_2184sa | t5_2to41 | 16 | [deleted]: TIFU by giving my 10 months year old brother brain damage.
^happend ^a ^few ^weeks ^ago
Ok, I know i fucked up hard. I was home alone and had simple instructions: take care of my ^sort-of new born baby brother. So there I was, sitting while he was on my lap, and then for some reason the little thing leans ... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1395668982 | 1395773594 | t3_2189lr | t5_2to41 | 117 | GCNINE: TIFU by going on her faceboook
Its beeeen twwwwoooo whole years! fuuuuuuuuuuuuu what happened to my conviction
Traffic_Light: Of course she's moved on with her life bro, did you expect her to be miserable and alone 2 years later? She's probably a totally different person now anyway.
Don't feel too bad though, ... | 13 | 9 | |
1395666711 | 1395721369 | t3_2186re | t5_2to41 | 36 | tilsitforthenommage: TIFU by getting soap in my eye due to my own exuberance.
While singing a slightly drunken-getting-clean-after-date-night song i punched the pump down on shower gel with enough force that the gel ricochet off the palm of my hand and into my open eye. So instead of sharing a shower with my partner wi... | 4 | 9 | |
1395679200 | 1395767982 | t3_218p9h | t5_2to41 | 2,324 | snr0n: TIFU at dental hygiene
So, I've been using a homemade toothpaste for a while now. I don't have any fluoride conspiracies for you, I just enjoy making some of my own home & hygiene products as a way to save money and live a little greener, and my teeth check out as being fine for it, so why not?
Well, I ran ... | 13 | 178.769231 | |
1395694048 | 1395823638 | t3_219fo0 | t5_2to41 | 6 | xJoltz: TIFU by getting into a argument and saying "I want to kill myself"
**So, some basic backstory first**
Me and my mum live together, my mum divorced my dad for what she said was "He is a powerfreak" This happened somewhere around 5 years or so ago and we moved into a nice flat in Ealing. My mum had to start work... | 14 | 0.428571 | |
1395699551 | 1395710293 | t3_219pjk | t5_2to41 | 79 | demosthenocke: TIFU by "kidnapping" a kid at NASCAR
I'm really happy to have stumbled upon this sub today, because I've got a doozy that JUST happened over the weekend.
My girlfriend and her parents attend the Auto Club 400 NASCAR race in Fontana every year. I would tease her (in good humor) about being a redneck NA... | 3 | 26.333333 | |
1395702418 | 1395702829 | t3_219ugh | t5_2to41 | 2 | 21skulls: TIFU by ruining my brand new /r/NoSleep shirt.
So about a month ago I bought the really sweet shirt that /r/nosleep had for sale, /r/nosleep being my favorite subreddit. I was looking forward to getting it in the mail. Today, the shirt came! Jersey knit, in my fave shade of ash grey. It was so soft, and was q... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1395699332 | 1396166602 | t3_219p5r | t5_2to41 | 43 | kleerintent: TIFU by breaking my cats leg.
BEFORE YOU VERBALLY CASTRATE ME!
I just got done setting up my living room and surround sound comfortably in my tiny apartment. So I turned my music on (JBL surround sound) and started doing my dishes. about an hour goes by, I'm jamming out in my bedroom, listening to t... | 7 | 6.142857 | |
1395698365 | 1395711566 | t3_219nge | t5_2to41 | 19 | GravityPhone: TIFU by falling asleep at work
I work in a computer repair shop, there was nothing to work on and I was really tired. I'm the only one here. Took my glasses off and shut my eyes just rest them for a minute. 25 minutes later I woke up with my boss in front of me. He didn't seem that upset but I texted ... | 3 | 6.333333 | |
1395710805 | 1395844184 | t3_21a8e8 | t5_2to41 | 33 | ughhhtifu: TIFU by ruining my chance at my dream job.
I have an interview tomorrow for literally my dream job. The interview is four hours away from home, so I rented a hotel room, drove all the way here, etc.
I have to bring proof of citizenship and I cannot find my motherfucking passport in the hotel room anywhere.... | 6 | 5.5 | |
1395731324 | 1395966762 | t3_21az5w | t5_2to41 | 90 | NoFlyingSolo: TIFU by sucking myself off (TL;DR at the end)
Dear Reddit... So I thought I had gotten my life pretty much together. Got a decent apprenticeship (might even turn into a full-time job), made into Senior Year with nice grades + GPA, began kicking ass at aikido (this one is important, I'll elaborate later on... | 5 | 18 | |
1395723652 | 1395735490 | t3_21ari2 | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by liking my best friend's best friend.
*back story* So I met my best friend almost two years ago. I started liking her shortly after. She was really my only good friend at this new school. She was there for me through everything and we understood each other greatly. We would flirt and stuff but I didn'... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1395767559 | 1395772516 | t3_21c3xn | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU By throwing away my brothers check
Are gameroom was looking pretty dirty so I decided to clean it. So I was cleaning, filling garbage bags with trash and papers and acadently threw away my brothers tax refund check worth $150 and I don't know what to do. I apologized via text and plan to in person when ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1395767401 | 1395797960 | t3_21c3n8 | t5_2to41 | 1,779 | 2009845: TIFU by being a drunk, horny young man.
On Friday night I went home from university for the first time in a few weeks to go on a night out for my friend's birthday. Over the course of the night, I noticed that another friend of mine, who we'll refer to as L, was a little, shall we say *flirtier* than usual. As... | 15 | 118.6 | |
1395771642 | 1395776273 | t3_21cb54 | t5_2to41 | 619 | [deleted]: TIFUpdate on having my wife arrested after church in front of our kids
Hey guys, a few of you have been asking for an update and I had been too busy since last few weeks, but finally got the time.
If you dont remember, I fucked up 22 days ago, [you can read about it HERE](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/commen... | 5 | 123.8 | |
1395770109 | 1395909995 | t3_21c8fd | t5_2to41 | 149 | mretzloff: TIFU by eating an orgasmic cookie
I have a lot of food allergies that make it very hard to enjoy treats with my friends that we all make together. I am allergic to peanuts, eggs, sesame seeds, kiwi and peas. I have many seasonal and dog allergies as well.
So last night, my neighbours decided to be the lovel... | 9 | 16.555556 | |
1395773801 | 1396021125 | t3_21cexm | t5_2to41 | 158 | TheJizzonator: TIFU by having an hour long meeting with a professor with a huge dried jizz stain on the back of my laptop
Title pretty much tells it. It wasn't an inconspicuous stain by any means, either. Does this count as a power move? I'm trying not to be completely embarrassed by it, so I'm just going to say I was ... | 5 | 31.6 | |
1395778416 | 1395930290 | t3_21cn6n | t5_2to41 | 83 | [deleted]: TIFU by shitting my pants at work.
I feel some pressure building up in my stomach after Lunch so i went to my work's bathroom. All 3 of the toilets were taken by other people so i decided to pee instead in an urinal. The pressure came back a few seconds later and I was like : "Oh let me fart it might help" B... | 5 | 16.6 | |
1395779322 | 1395802126 | t3_21coso | t5_2to41 | 18 | [deleted]: TIFU by botching my easiest final.
So actually I tucked up last week, but grades came out today, so today I found out I fucked up. I was taking 3 classes last quarter, 1 very difficult upper division programming class, an upper level circuits class, and a pretty basic engineering class. Well I spent all fina... | 3 | 6 | |
1395783478 | 1395847728 | t3_21cwd2 | t5_2to41 | 59 | [deleted]: TIFU by pooping on my carpet
Around 9am this morning I was peacefully waking up in that semi-conscious feels-nice kinda state. I got out of bed, naked, and stood surveying my room while thinking about my day to come. Like any reasonable person does when alone and at home, I let out a little fart. As soon ... | 7 | 8.428571 | |
1395785802 | 1395786345 | t3_21d0t3 | t5_2to41 | 28 | BlindMusician: TIFU by rubbing my penis on a (probably) 14 year old girl
I'm 17, which makes this situation a little less worse than what you may have been suspecting. Anyways:
I went to our school dance just last Friday with my a few of my friends. This is the most informal of our school dances. As usual for my 6' 6"... | 3 | 9.333333 | |
1395779902 | 1395804134 | t3_21cpvz | t5_2to41 | 12 | [deleted]: TIFU by not being able to math or use common sense.
TIFU because I was supposed to buy 200 regular stamps for our wedding invites, or 300 if they were too heavy for regular postage. (At my mom's behest -- she is helping us with wedding planning)
The woman at the post office said that the weight of the invit... | 3 | 4 | |
1395795228 | 1395813776 | t3_21dgqm | t5_2to41 | 31 | [deleted]: TIFU by pissing before a random drug test
I am in highschool and my school does random drug tests. They give you the note right before lunch and I happen to always piss right before lunch. I only ever have to go like twice a day and ended up having to sit awkwardly with the lab guy and the dean of disipline ... | 4 | 7.75 | |
1395788614 | 1395938261 | t3_21d5kl | t5_2to41 | 21 | diggerB: TIFU at Roll Up the Rim to Win!
Well, actually, TIL that I've been fucking up the whole time...
So I've been getting my daily coffee or two at Tim Horton's since they started the RUtRtW promotion this year. Every day it's the same thing... go to Timmie's, get a double-double, drink it, and roll up the rim. "P... | 3 | 7 | |
1395795425 | 1395801649 | t3_21dh49 | t5_2to41 | 4 | znyk: TIFU By eating a lot of salt.
I wasn't really hungry, but I wanted the taste of delicious food in my mouth. My solution was to taste a bunch of spice mixes that I've got lying around. One of them was the naturally delicious taco seasoning, so I kept licking some off my hand. Now I've eaten about three days' worth... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1395792963 | 1395815536 | t3_21dcxo | t5_2to41 | 12 | Akasa_Fox: TIFU by listening to GWAR.
As many of you know, Dave Brockie, the lead singer of GWAR passed away the other day, and after hearing the tragic news, I decided to honor the band, and his legacy by blasting GWAR during my drive to school.
When I parked, I switched to my headphones, and walked across campus to... | 3 | 4 | |
1395802146 | 1395817667 | t3_21dsmr | t5_2to41 | 97 | TheScrotumSlicer: TIFU by slicing my scrotum...
Reddit, today I fucked up by slicing my scrotum…
Background
I’m not a very hairy person, little chest hair, can’t grow much facial hair, etc. However, for some reason, I got the pubic hair gene and I can grow that shit like crazy. Sort of disappointing, honestly.
Now, ... | 5 | 19.4 | |
1395810706 | 1395893957 | t3_21e474 | t5_2to41 | 13 | failedaclass: TIFU by failing a class
It was a tough class. It was the last one I needed in order to graduate from college. Now, I have to stay back another semester. This will cost me $4000 in tuition plus whatever money I could have earned by working.
j00sr: > plus whatever money I could have earned by working
We... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1395808809 | 1395975217 | t3_21e1vd | t5_2to41 | 37 | Lewan72: TIFU by talking about my sexual frustrations in the staircase.
At school today, me and my friend were walking down a staircase afterschool where its usually empty. Of course as guys left alone we began to start talking about girls and in particular these two girls that we were friends with. I said something al... | 4 | 9.25 | |
1395816989 | 1395857461 | t3_21eaaq | t5_2to41 | 22 | Cats_n_Porn: TIFU by letting some asshole steal my phone, practially right in front of me
I work pizza delivery. I tend to leave my car unlocked and my phone in my car. I know, stupid. I also like to think people aren't such pieces of shit that they would go into my unlocked car and steal my shit in broad daylight, ... | 4 | 5.5 | |
1395823016 | 1395948508 | t3_21eeu7 | t5_2to41 | 2,583 | Abondben: TIFU by trying to dry my nuts
So I spend a lot of time in compression shorts, because I play sports, and work out at the gym. Today I had to do some errands after going to the gym so it took me a while to get to a shower, which bugs me because I have a fear of getting jock itch...It isn't something you want t... | 18 | 143.5 | |
1395846432 | 1396058762 | t3_21erzl | t5_2to41 | 8 | Banhammer40000: Like I don't feel bad enough about it already saying these dumbass things to a guy I'm working for, I gotta be berated by you?
This sub is called "Today ***I FUCKED UP***", right? It's not "I made a socially unacceptable mistake come kick me in the ass while I'm feeling bad enough about it already",... | 9 | 0.888889 | |
1395801186 | 1395932648 | t3_21dr3o | t5_2to41 | 22 | IceGlow: TIFU by waxing
I've been a long time lurker on this sub, but the day finally came that I screwed up enough to have a post here.
I've grown tired of shaving and decided to start waxing unwanted hair instead. I did my legs, and underarms, then I went for the bikini area. I decided to would be a good idea to jus... | 3 | 7.333333 | |
1395846599 | 1397840823 | t3_21f3ao | t5_2to41 | 44 | Ru93: TIFU by not noticing a typo in my Master's application
"...I wish to complete my studies the Scotland." IN Scotland. :(
Just after I said that English wasn't my first language as well. Just great. This is for my absolute first choice as well. Now I'll definitely not get in.
I've read and re-read this document so... | 12 | 3.666667 | |
1395851780 | 1395854401 | t3_21fc4m | t5_2to41 | 6 | ReihEhcsaSlaSthcin: TIFU By Trying To Give My Granddaughter Money
Tht1nick: This is what hapened in breaking bad not your life... This is from mikes perspective
Quatzecoatl: Thank you so much, I never would have been able to figure that out... /s
| 3 | 2 | |
1395863098 | 1395871687 | t3_21fwb7 | t5_2to41 | 26 | throwaway109109: TIFU by accidentally bringing my katana to school
(Not actually today, but last year)
So I go to a high school in Georgia, and I was walking down the hall to my first class when some kid walks up to me and shoves me. I get picked on a lot (seeing as I'm the kind of guy who spends his time on Reddit a... | 4 | 6.5 | |
1395863920 | 1395935833 | t3_21fxu8 | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidentally making a Malaysian Flight 370 Joke
I work with some very conservative, very serious people. As in, no joking around permitted, and morbid/offensive jokes are beyond the pale.
Anyway, last night I left my phone charger at work. When I got home, my phone was low on battery so I set it int... | 6 | 2.833333 | |
1395864277 | 1395922073 | t3_21fygr | t5_2to41 | 98 | [deleted]: TIFU and flung dog poop high into the air, onto my house, and onto my sweater
So I'm taking the little guy (3 month old pup) for a walk and he takes a big poop. Good job buddy!
I picked it up like a good citizen and was headed back to my apartment. There is no garbage can nearby so I usually collect it in ... | 4 | 24.5 | |
1395873307 | 1396038482 | t3_21geg1 | t5_2to41 | 73 | ipeedthrowaway1: TIFU by wetting the bed
I am so ashamed. It's 3:49 am here, and I am writing this cause I can't sleep no more...
**Backstory**: I am 28 yrs old. My house was fumigated yesterday for bed bugs, so me and my husband couldn't sleep at our place cause of the smell. We went to our neighbour's house for the ... | 4 | 18.25 | |
1395805008 | 1395886726 | t3_21dwtx | t5_2to41 | 16 | eewwee: TIFU by eating ice cream for dinner
graphic poo story to ensue. you have been warned.
my college campus has a convenience store where you can use your meal plan money to buy various necessities and snacks. lucky for me this store is right across from my residence hall, and they sell Ben & Jerry's. nearing... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1395874988 | 1395880756 | t3_21ghb2 | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by having sex with a banana peel
just kidding, it was awesome!
TL;DR: go fuck a banana peel.
KristyConfused: I have a business installing styrofoam nuns. Fuck a fruit basket.
itislaboeuf: I don't get it
KristyConfused: look up Day Job Orchestra on Youtube. Find their video "Happy in Paraguay" - it's o... | 4 | 1 | |
1395876491 | 1396099817 | t3_21gjrz | t5_2to41 | 6 | LadyGrizabella: TIFU at work by burning my arm with boiling water
I work in a kitchen (well, several actually since I get shifted around quite a bit) and on the menu today was mashed potatoes.
We make the potatoes with hot water and while our sinks produce water hot enough (per guidelines) for the mashed potatoes, the... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1395877744 | 1395881350 | t3_21glw0 | t5_2to41 | 9 | shagadociousthekoala: TIFU by falling in love with my best girl-friend who is in love with one of my best guy freinds who has a girlfreind whom he is in love with
So I have liked her for a really long ass time like at least 3 years and tonight at youth group she was really upset about the situation with my guy friend w... | 6 | 1.5 | |
1395879076 | 1395928777 | t3_21go2b | t5_2to41 | 17 | TIFU12345: TIFU by clicking a link on 4chan
As I was browsing /b/ on 4chan and came across a thread that provided a link. Without thinking I clicked on it and it brought me to a Google search witch asked hot to kill the president and acquire illegal pornography, and now I am nervous as fuck. Is there possibly be reperc... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1395900240 | 1396211617 | t3_21hhnv | t5_2to41 | 128 | pesh527: TIFU by slapping my boyfriend's balls
I only connected the dots of the situation recently, and wow did I fuck up.
Back in 2011, I was away at college, and drunk with my boyfriend one night. I think we were going to have sex, and therefore were naked, and on my bed, which was raised higher than normal for st... | 8 | 16 | |
1395909744 | 1396056758 | t3_21hp6f | t5_2to41 | 11,295 | Bagatell: TIFU by showing my dick on Chatroulette
Actually yesterday. I couldn't sleep, so I wanted to kill some time on chatroulette. I met this cute girl from Morocco (She was white, but I didn't think about it. She could've moved there later or something, right?), and one thing lead to another and she's masturbating... | 19 | 594.473684 |
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