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suicidewatch | H0bo_Joe | 2019/09/19 | I want to die but i'm afraid of death? To try to explain what has happened over the past while would take forever, so i'll try to keep this short as I can.
Back in June of this year the weight of all the shit that has been going on in my life was becoming too much and I was planning out my suicide every day on my walk... | 4.043211 | 4.682973 | 4.896414 | 86.605851 | 70.8509 | 8.041171 | 27.815009 | 8.13951 | 1.623767 | 1,486 | 50 | 317 | 20 | 26 | 483 | 183 | 389 | 0.152 | 0.723 | 0.125 | -0.9473 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 33 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 19 | 22 | 3 | 3 | 21 | 0 | 23 | 12 | 4 | 6 | 7 | 71 | 64 | 25 | 5 | 11 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 22 | 2 | 4 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 3 | 50 | 9 | 59 | 44 | 15 | 59 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 20 | 23 | 2 | 7 | 25 | 221 | 65 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080315 | 0.065732 | 0 | 0.05211 | 0.094411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075604 | 0.093327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087157 | 0 | 0 | 0.073637 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220521 | 0.176261 | 0.073628 | 0 | 0.177439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056462 | 0 | 0.288097 | 0 | 0 | 0.08362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13209 | 0 | 0.133986 | 0 | 0.194331 | 0 | 0.06837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151965 | 0 | 0 | 0.04698 | 0.139362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087414 | 0.18114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077153 | 0.080887 | 0.114123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188522 | 0.063386 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163209 | 0.177792 | 0.074642 | 0.089313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245391 | 0 | 0 | 0.095762 | 0 | 0.085507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086515 | 0.13624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06581 | 0 | 0 | 0.060506 | 0.091115 | 0.136536 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093506 | 0.097007 | 0 | 0 | 0.128547 | 0 | 0 | 0.078702 | 0 | 0 | 0.056792 | 0.054775 | 0 | 0.203595 | 0.049847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151263 | 0 | 0 | 0.104097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062234 | 0.086813 | 0 | 0.060726 | 0 | 0 | 0.110098 |
suicidewatch | Thrownawaylikeapaper | 2019/09/19 | I don’t think I can handle having a mental disorder like this I found out today that schizophrenia runs fairly commonly in my family along my mother’s bloodline, and I don’t know if I can handle being schizophrenic, I think I would rather take myself out of this world than find out what evil things my mind can come up ... | 3.859886 | 4.51986 | 4.983921 | 85.739884 | 71.27907 | 7.884523 | 25.990377 | 7.990435 | 1.380986 | 1,632 | 48 | 344 | 21 | 29 | 539 | 186 | 430 | 0.137 | 0.731 | 0.132 | -0.8212 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 42 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 2 | 19 | 24 | 5 | 3 | 13 | 0 | 43 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 66 | 80 | 27 | 3 | 11 | 14 | 3 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 24 | 23 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 13 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 13 | 7 | 65 | 15 | 50 | 55 | 3 | 42 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 20 | 21 | 2 | 9 | 23 | 239 | 89 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082855 | 0 | 0.187423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074461 | 0.052499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063889 | 0 | 0 | 0.066404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129353 | 0.078722 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064668 | 0.076207 | 0.077923 | 0 | 0.172101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067479 | 0 | 0.212342 | 0.084488 | 0.037964 | 0 | 0 | 0.082249 | 0.137248 | 0 | 0 | 0.164648 | 0 | 0.069412 | 0.039227 | 0.072026 | 0.085342 | 0 | 0.06005 | 0 | 0 | 0.074343 | 0.066395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166135 | 0 | 0.12379 | 0 | 0 | 0.079501 | 0 | 0.23033 | 0 | 0.330132 | 0 | 0.066299 | 0 | 0.06305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142089 | 0.050118 | 0.076122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15133 | 0.07965 | 0.075812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110388 | 0 | 0.057908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228414 | 0 | 0 | 0.16674 | 0 | 0.071674 | 0 | 0 | 0.235335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059708 | 0.150341 | 0 | 0.119662 | 0 | 0.078327 | 0 | 0.077071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190851 | 0 | 0 | 0.168097 | 0 | 0 | 0.059961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078039 | 0.056452 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099763 | 0.096219 | 0 | 0.059607 | 0 | 0 | 0.071169 | 0 | 0 | 0.050976 | 0 | 0 | 0.078163 | 0 | 0 | 0.082692 | 0 | 0.044285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076515 | 0.213345 | 0 | 0 | 0.04835 |
suicidewatch | whocaresnotme1 | 2019/09/19 | I want to jump off my goddamn roof The fall probably won't be enough to kill me but I don't care I just want to hurt myself. I'm broke, disabled and have 0 direction in life and everything fucking sucks. It genuinely feels like the end of the line for me and I just want to jump and hurt myself beyond repair because I d... | 0.470833 | 2.634503 | 2.342222 | 94.3 | 85.388889 | 5.822222 | 20.111111 | 7.168622 | 0.420911 | 266 | 8 | 60 | 4 | 8 | 88 | 49 | 72 | 0.291 | 0.571 | 0.139 | -0.9436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 15 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 2 | 9 | 13 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 37 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197975 | 0.230959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11302 | 0.159685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.413286 | 0 | 0.214423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.478571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247295 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157881 | 0.109202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.395518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | downthee_rabbithole | 2019/09/19 | You’re not alone Did you know that if you text 741741 when you are feeling really depressed or suicidal, a crisis counselor will text with you? Many people do not like talking on the phone and would benefit from the Crisis Text Line. You are not alone... | 4.39125 | 6.477962 | 4.085833 | 87.1425 | 71.916667 | 7.3 | 24.5 | 8.076483 | 1.373275 | 202 | 6 | 38 | 3 | 4 | 61 | 35 | 48 | 0.297 | 0.604 | 0.099 | -0.9374 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 8 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 25 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.651946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.271083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.319094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.344271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252974 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22358 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ShiveringEyes | 2019/09/19 | I’m currently in an ambulance car I told my girlfriend I was trying to overdose, and she got extremely worried and stuff~ eventually her parents found her crying at 1:15 in the morning so they called 911 and here I am... I regret so many decisions and actions I’ve done. This was incredibly dumb of me and ironically I j... | 0.585562 | 3.069083 | 2.859868 | 87.662646 | 90.84466 | 6.438003 | 21.92025 | 7.709487 | 1.331425 | 401 | 15 | 82 | 9 | 14 | 136 | 74 | 103 | 0.253 | 0.713 | 0.035 | -0.9778 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 19 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 14 | 1 | 12 | 11 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 57 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18186 | 0 | 0 | 0.135617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225132 | 0 | 0.379645 | 0.107275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20817 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227992 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1962 | 0 | 0.139404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121108 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208521 | 0 | 0 | 0.448988 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | nenezz | 2019/09/19 | Living out of guilt I’m 22 and this is roughly my 8th year of depression (with occasional peaks and periods of normality) and I would’ve tried more seriously to end things a long time ago if I wasn’t held back by guilt. What do you do when you know things won’t improve but you can’t bare to cause suffering? I cause the... | 0.105745 | 2.068953 | 2.386638 | 94.694 | 85.170213 | 6.313191 | 17.910638 | 7.554174 | 0.148276 | 336 | 8 | 83 | 6 | 10 | 114 | 65 | 94 | 0.258 | 0.599 | 0.143 | -0.9061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 15 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 11 | 2 | 11 | 11 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 48 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.490362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120679 | 0.170507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116603 | 0 | 0.210751 | 0.211216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.317125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169545 | 0 | 0 | 0.153696 |
suicidewatch | _Honour | 2019/09/19 | Conflicted First off, this might just get buried, or someone will recognize the name, I don’t really care.
I’ve been contemplating posting something like this a few times now, but I feel like there’s no going back this time.
I feel like I’ve had enough, and I’m back where I promised myself I’d never be again. 8 year... | 4.172353 | 3.974344 | 5.095201 | 88.244644 | 70.33515 | 7.871637 | 26.491082 | 7.168622 | 1.048859 | 1,345 | 36 | 305 | 11 | 22 | 441 | 178 | 367 | 0.125 | 0.676 | 0.199 | 0.9836 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 45 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 22 | 26 | 3 | 1 | 15 | 1 | 24 | 9 | 4 | 4 | 6 | 70 | 62 | 27 | 0 | 6 | 11 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 17 | 20 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 13 | 9 | 0 | 4 | 11 | 11 | 43 | 17 | 44 | 45 | 8 | 48 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 27 | 14 | 3 | 9 | 33 | 199 | 60 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163942 | 0 | 0 | 0.077526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073446 | 0.12022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062414 | 0 | 0 | 0.10083 | 0.161185 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069238 | 0.161546 | 0 | 0.051632 | 0.141423 | 0.065864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197632 | 0.16754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066494 | 0 | 0 | 0.060396 | 0.072269 | 0.163368 | 0.07499 | 0.088855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249649 | 0 | 0 | 0.080228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052397 | 0 | 0 | 0.077643 | 0 | 0 | 0.083685 | 0.088247 | 0 | 0 | 0.077574 | 0 | 0 | 0.081405 | 0.128885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084935 | 0 | 0.165647 | 0.190956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070554 | 0.147938 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165858 | 0.157864 | 0 | 0.062397 | 0 | 0.057466 | 0 | 0.180875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086801 | 0 | 0 | 0.10839 | 0.136515 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078194 | 0.088978 | 0.050079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088554 | 0 | 0 | 0.186498 | 0.078264 | 0 | 0.18688 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132471 | 0.060181 | 0 | 0.175016 | 0 | 0.083322 | 0.062429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05009 | 0 | 0 | 0.227915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053074 | 0.085029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159329 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050341 |
suicidewatch | suicidethrowaway1991 | 2019/09/19 | hey I had a weird life... I am almost 29 and I lost all my chances... would like some words to weigh in... I had a lot of weird experiences as a kid... Moved around a lot with my single mother, I was always lonely. Then I had some friends that I would hang out for 2 years and that was some of the happiest times of my l... | 3.244694 | 4.260639 | 4.569759 | 86.818349 | 73.018547 | 8.102983 | 23.657766 | 8.529434 | 1.231475 | 2,444 | 64 | 541 | 42 | 47 | 811 | 241 | 647 | 0.089 | 0.733 | 0.178 | 0.9964 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 100 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 5 | 28 | 42 | 2 | 0 | 24 | 0 | 66 | 16 | 1 | 6 | 10 | 116 | 105 | 52 | 0 | 6 | 20 | 5 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 5 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 16 | 33 | 35 | 1 | 1 | 19 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 20 | 13 | 1 | 2 | 30 | 4 | 91 | 29 | 72 | 70 | 26 | 58 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 7 | 47 | 21 | 1 | 25 | 37 | 380 | 124 | 2 | 0.067044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067135 | 0 | 0 | 0.053615 | 0.055786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070301 | 0.102577 | 0 | 0.199468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154658 | 0.055979 | 0 | 0 | 0.057049 | 0 | 0 | 0.11859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07668 | 0 | 0.068872 | 0.070923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044282 | 0.12129 | 0 | 0 | 0.060255 | 0.131163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064373 | 0 | 0.061277 | 0.057027 | 0 | 0 | 0.051798 | 0.061981 | 0.070055 | 0 | 0.038103 | 0.056233 | 0.053621 | 0 | 0 | 0.066384 | 0.059287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059592 | 0 | 0.069816 | 0.257919 | 0 | 0.075628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.331485 | 0.262034 | 0 | 0 | 0.059332 | 0 | 0 | 0.073186 | 0.227993 | 0.06051 | 0.063438 | 0.089504 | 0 | 0.134709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139439 | 0.11708 | 0.070046 | 0 | 0.063378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057255 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053425 | 0.122068 | 0 | 0.07574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273371 | 0 | 0.154841 | 0 | 0 | 0.047454 | 0 | 0.160624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063188 | 0 | 0 | 0.107774 | 0.117198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044541 | 0.300713 | 0.06587 | 0 | 0.117281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057904 | 0 | 0 | 0.079088 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06028 | 0.06215 | 0.060497 | 0.074852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095252 | 0 | 0 | 0.043174 |
suicidewatch | big_gassy_ginger | 2019/09/19 | Im spent... emotionally and financially spent... Every time. I think seriously about suicide. I watch a video on YouTube. The reality of suicide: Daughter crying months after father commits suicide. And can’t do that to my son. Today, every monthly bill went through and put my account at $50.00. Then my water heater ex... | 2.728755 | 5.754898 | 3.557247 | 81.284562 | 90.265823 | 5.164979 | 29.368143 | 6.816662 | 2.087632 | 350 | 18 | 56 | 5 | 12 | 111 | 61 | 79 | 0.32 | 0.668 | 0.012 | -0.9802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 34 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 10 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 30 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196988 | 0.155106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.295095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.574663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112211 | 0 | 0 | 0.102115 | 0.402553 | 0.165995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | taanbnietha | 2019/09/19 | Feeling hopeless I don’t want to hurt myself. But I’m so tired of these passive thoughts of being so overwhelmed I wish everything could just stop. I’ve been suicidal with a plan before, and I’m not that bad now. I’ve worked with people who are suicidal because of my profession. But I don’t understand why I can’t seem... | 3.372944 | 4.780083 | 4.366671 | 86.878888 | 73.22973 | 7.355145 | 25.820294 | 7.914712 | 1.386261 | 2,877 | 95 | 593 | 40 | 57 | 934 | 283 | 740 | 0.185 | 0.656 | 0.159 | -0.9862 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 66 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 7 | 44 | 63 | 3 | 14 | 20 | 2 | 48 | 10 | 1 | 4 | 9 | 153 | 127 | 74 | 2 | 15 | 40 | 0 | 14 | 7 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 34 | 39 | 0 | 3 | 36 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 20 | 39 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 18 | 81 | 24 | 89 | 97 | 22 | 62 | 4 | 8 | 3 | 3 | 29 | 24 | 1 | 23 | 36 | 397 | 115 | 5 | 0.050743 | 0 | 0.049517 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052554 | 0 | 0 | 0.126666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057325 | 0.050323 | 0.03548 | 0 | 0.041757 | 0.045172 | 0 | 0.057727 | 0 | 0 | 0.042368 | 0.061864 | 0 | 0.043178 | 0 | 0 | 0.089755 | 0.055398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103628 | 0 | 0.051736 | 0 | 0 | 0.087421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052313 | 0.043705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042389 | 0.057079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13406 | 0.0459 | 0 | 0 | 0.045604 | 0.049636 | 0.095671 | 0 | 0.359198 | 0.108752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043162 | 0 | 0 | 0.039204 | 0.046911 | 0.026511 | 0 | 0.057676 | 0.042561 | 0 | 0 | 0.055899 | 0 | 0 | 0.054016 | 0 | 0.050098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049971 | 0 | 0.054321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050354 | 0.045102 | 0 | 0 | 0.08366 | 0 | 0 | 0.053729 | 0.055132 | 0.051888 | 0.071682 | 0.173532 | 0 | 0.044807 | 0.044906 | 0.042611 | 0 | 0 | 0.086279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111905 | 0.037625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047619 | 0 | 0.097378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.034385 | 0 | 0.161981 | 0.059536 | 0 | 0 | 0.04844 | 0.316607 | 0.088613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114963 | 0.043334 | 0 | 0 | 0.203209 | 0 | 0.080871 | 0.230971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050779 | 0 | 0.085988 | 0.039064 | 0.150557 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162093 | 0.042423 | 0.058126 | 0.053047 | 0 | 0.111008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038152 | 0.16314 | 0.133054 | 0 | 0 | 0.058916 | 0 | 0.065028 | 0.149563 | 0.161136 | 0.059177 | 0.058321 | 0 | 0.048487 | 0 | 0.241156 | 0 | 0 | 0.052825 | 0 | 0.043825 | 0 | 0.041868 | 0.179576 | 0.040277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047039 | 0.091575 | 0 | 0.116703 | 0 | 0 | 0.073882 | 0.051532 | 0 | 0.072092 | 0.110958 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | lrosenberg101 | 2019/09/19 | No More Suicide Date On April 25, I met this girl who does student sports media at the station at our college. She’s currently a sophomore and I’m a senior.
Anyways, I took a break from the station for my mental health after I had a suicide attempt in December due to being accused of something I didn’t do which turne... | 3.019815 | 4.702707 | 4.590475 | 83.791639 | 74.679012 | 8.069877 | 26.553292 | 8.769985 | 1.993661 | 1,896 | 70 | 384 | 39 | 40 | 636 | 207 | 486 | 0.072 | 0.822 | 0.106 | 0.9619 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 31 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 16 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 24 | 0 | 35 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 65 | 81 | 27 | 4 | 2 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 37 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 5 | 0 | 10 | 13 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 37 | 4 | 81 | 12 | 52 | 37 | 9 | 60 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 64 | 19 | 0 | 4 | 32 | 275 | 118 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0.164395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05728 | 0 | 0 | 0.095157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051347 | 0 | 0.071675 | 0 | 0.088395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.380255 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079406 | 0 | 0.04259 | 0.060175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287223 | 0 | 0.067367 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074485 | 0.089666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089534 | 0 | 0 | 0.056458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082951 | 0 | 0 | 0.095087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231456 | 0.137319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178485 | 0.123453 | 0 | 0.074378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084885 | 0.089356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06192 | 0 | 0.129929 | 0.081351 | 0 | 0 | 0.082529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187057 | 0.091214 | 0 | 0 | 0.073547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095417 | 0 | 0.160246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064845 | 0 | 0 | 0.119238 | 0 | 0.067267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.276406 | 0 | 0.079387 | 0 | 0 | 0.135404 | 0.073622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049116 | 0 | 0 | 0.241459 | 0.187168 | 0 | 0.091619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072749 | 0 | 0 | 0.049682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | VinylSchbee | 2019/09/19 | Anytime I bring up my depression I get shot down If I bring it up to my best friend, who mind you is one of the reasons I am depressed because she rejected me and reminds me of it weekly, I get met with "Everyone around you is depressed, we are all depressed". I feel like my own sadness is not as meaningful as people I... | 2.332146 | 3.66672 | 4.279524 | 86.755704 | 75.766169 | 7.214055 | 26.990361 | 7.865859 | 1.552714 | 746 | 29 | 160 | 11 | 16 | 255 | 114 | 201 | 0.147 | 0.768 | 0.085 | -0.8147 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 23 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 16 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 30 | 39 | 9 | 2 | 4 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 4 | 32 | 7 | 28 | 32 | 7 | 26 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 15 | 14 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 116 | 40 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0.242932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087033 | 0 | 0 | 0.110806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151753 | 0.137469 | 0 | 0 | 0.130625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.536035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118938 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125873 | 0.088922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.288499 | 0 | 0.130062 | 0 | 0.14148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137709 | 0 | 0.068406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06081 | 0 | 0.10991 | 0.110153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12568 | 0 | 0.099352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138211 | 0.13479 | 0 | 0.086293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124505 | 0 | 0.079739 | 0.255954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073416 | 0 | 0.099843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27185 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | bellboi666 | 2019/09/19 | I’m going nowhere and seriously am thinking of ending it soon. I’m 19 years old and going absolutely nowhere in life. I’m taking classes at a local community college. I used to live with my grandfather and went to a well established university. On July 12th, I woke up to find him dead. I had to move back in with my mom... | 1.023333 | 2.869421 | 3.373529 | 89.51834 | 81.101911 | 6.224883 | 23.842463 | 7.3011 | 0.929867 | 574 | 21 | 128 | 8 | 15 | 198 | 97 | 157 | 0.126 | 0.782 | 0.092 | -0.7303 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 17 | 30 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 16 | 2 | 27 | 22 | 2 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 79 | 21 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.321768 | 0.17142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238891 | 0 | 0.094693 | 0 | 0.132182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124025 | 0 | 0 | 0.10018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275167 | 0 | 0 | 0.1026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243474 | 0 | 0.264847 | 0 | 0.124238 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168776 | 0 | 0.10972 | 0 | 0 | 0.137167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132063 | 0 | 0 | 0.10369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18193 | 0 | 0.3302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163002 | 0 | 0.105261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1032 | 0.099535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134163 | 0 | 0 | 0.091623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139668 | 0.144 | 0 | 0.17343 | 0.178632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100033 |
suicidewatch | imdrawingblanksdude | 2019/09/19 | I'm tired I guess I'm depressed. I know thats real shocking coming from a post in here. But I'm used to having things hit me real hard for one night, and then I feel better in the morning, which lasts for a few months before I get bad again. Todays about the 10th day a row that I've ended wanting to disappear. I've tal... | 1.818815 | 3.738134 | 3.440692 | 89.647474 | 78.867841 | 5.909713 | 22.263268 | 6.86897 | 0.606537 | 860 | 26 | 179 | 9 | 21 | 285 | 142 | 227 | 0.189 | 0.713 | 0.098 | -0.9432 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 26 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 18 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 1 | 16 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 36 | 44 | 13 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 7 | 24 | 8 | 23 | 33 | 3 | 35 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 22 | 112 | 35 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101746 | 0 | 0 | 0.118878 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095837 | 0 | 0 | 0.09767 | 0.129319 | 0 | 0.304543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121423 | 0.098874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148048 | 0 | 0.098861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304986 | 0 | 0 | 0.227435 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103158 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290184 | 0.082 | 0.110208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059968 | 0 | 0.065233 | 0.096273 | 0 | 0 | 0.126444 | 0 | 0.1015 | 0 | 0.102821 | 0.113322 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126161 | 0.093562 | 0.129478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125297 | 0 | 0.103594 | 0 | 0.076617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088526 | 0 | 0 | 0.107714 | 0 | 0.220271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077779 | 0.087296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109928 | 0 | 0.123753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114916 | 0 | 0 | 0.104492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114864 | 0 | 0.097254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091664 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076255 | 0 | 0 | 0.091123 | 0 | 0.131924 | 0.108799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099134 | 0.126415 | 0 | 0.135402 | 0 | 0.09207 | 0 | 0.103202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081537 | 0 | 0 | 0.073915 |
suicidewatch | obabma | 2019/09/19 | I put all my strength into reconstructing my life and a gust of wind can knock it down in an instant Im so sad. I dont know what to do. Everyone im surrounded by doesnt know what theyre talking about. | 0.732333 | 2.214026 | 3.219722 | 92.01625 | 80.555556 | 7.166667 | 24.583333 | 8.076483 | 1.191333 | 158 | 6 | 39 | 3 | 4 | 55 | 36 | 45 | 0.095 | 0.83 | 0.076 | -0.2002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.364872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.672572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.342194 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.312969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Twisted_Fighrtist | 2019/09/19 | Out The world is needlessly complex. I think I want out. | 0.16 | 2.339095 | 1.573182 | 93.579773 | 103.545455 | 5.836364 | 23.681818 | 7.168622 | 1.486418 | 44 | 2 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 14 | 9 | 11 | 0 | 0.86 | 0.14 | 0.0772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.735744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.67726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | m1k3chaa3 | 2019/09/19 | im crazy,, don't be my friend.. I'm crazy. Don't be my friend
I'm crazy. Don't be my friend
I'm crazy. Don't be my friend
I'm crazy. Don't be my friend
I'm crazy. Don't be my friend
I'm crazy. Don't be my friend
I'm crazy. Don't be my friend
I'm crazy. Don't be my friend. Get Away from me
I'm crazy. Don... | -4.383413 | -4.130617 | -2.108166 | 117.754084 | 127.843931 | 1.701639 | 4.446777 | 3.1291 | -3.402424 | 1,644 | 1 | 518 | 0 | 122 | 520 | 17 | 519 | 0.354 | 0.531 | 0.116 | -0.999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 81 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 43 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 87 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 164 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 43 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 44 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 79 | 43 | 70 | 120 | 0 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 43 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 236 | 79 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.016513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.547546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.553175 | 0 | 0.304481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.017986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.014703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.548334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | shanetrey5 | 2019/09/19 | I wish I could settle on a way to view myself, I've found it really difficult to keep telling myself there's no way forward Nearly every day of the past ten years I can reflect on myself and say "yeah you're a terrible fucking person, you deserve to feel like this and the only way for you to make up for all the bad you... | 6.921368 | 4.963951 | 6.982717 | 82.759453 | 65.462264 | 10.366792 | 31.10566 | 8.841846 | 2.136998 | 799 | 21 | 177 | 10 | 10 | 257 | 120 | 212 | 0.14 | 0.769 | 0.091 | -0.8568 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 10 | 13 | 2 | 2 | 11 | 1 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 37 | 29 | 18 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 5 | 23 | 5 | 27 | 20 | 3 | 26 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 10 | 1 | 2 | 15 | 124 | 36 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154328 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10661 | 0 | 0.094744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127843 | 0 | 0.100356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181195 | 0 | 0 | 0.073179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094791 | 0 | 0.100502 | 0 | 0 | 0.074947 | 0 | 0.095604 | 0.108427 | 0.101981 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057374 | 0.081064 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096518 | 0 | 0.124415 | 0 | 0.104902 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076057 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110873 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096469 | 0 | 0.107369 | 0.378714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153782 | 0.0863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108321 | 0.157333 | 0.099079 | 0 | 0 | 0.107267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180474 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094867 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297536 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066928 | 0.360272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080607 | 0 | 0 | 0.146143 |
suicidewatch | santamuertevikings | 2019/09/19 | Cant believe I'm back here again. I'm done. I'm so tired if this cycle, I'm tired of my alters making my decisions for me. I'm tired of everyone making decisions for me. It was never me. It was my alters, my mom, even my ex boyfriend. I can't do this. This is my decision. This is for me. | -1.949812 | -0.086929 | 1.749744 | 95.381368 | 96.846154 | 5.350427 | 16.452991 | 6.937598 | 0.00394 | 219 | 6 | 54 | 4 | 9 | 80 | 33 | 65 | 0.172 | 0.828 | 0 | -0.9047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 7 | 15 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 5 | 12 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 37 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148079 | 0 | 0 | 0.214229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.77304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | JoeyMonsterMash | 2019/09/19 | Hi Keep telling myself to just kill myself as a passing thought. I dunno. | 1.582857 | 4.331824 | 2.311429 | 90.958571 | 90.428571 | 2.8 | 28.428571 | 3.1291 | 0.738971 | 58 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 13 | 14 | 0.299 | 0.701 | 0 | -0.6908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.481459 | 0.599275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.473441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.430024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | toxthefox_ | 2019/09/19 | 5 years left So i just went on a mental breakdown and burnt every bridge and relationship ive ever had
Going on a huge tyraid of just blocking and removing people
Now i finally get to be alone
Im now giving myself 5 years to see how my life pans out, if it doesn't work im gonna end it | 1.602187 | 2.650914 | 4.152 | 88.093 | 77.125 | 6.995 | 20.6125 | 7.554174 | 0.528598 | 226 | 5 | 52 | 3 | 5 | 80 | 49 | 64 | 0.079 | 0.84 | 0.081 | 0.0258 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 29 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204381 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208732 | 0.194422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12056 | 0.221362 | 0.131144 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.498512 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250717 | 0 | 0.16299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.232548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297199 |
suicidewatch | aaaa383838 | 2019/09/19 | Don’t know what to do I don’t even know what to do anymore. I wish I was dead but I can’t kill my self. I can’t bring that upon the people who know me. I don’t want them to feel guilty, even if none of them cared. No one cared. They will only care if I kill my self. But I can’t bring myself to. Help | -2.980417 | -1.372285 | -0.162556 | 109.052 | 99.138889 | 2.88 | 8.588889 | 3.1291 | -2.533938 | 227 | 1 | 67 | 0 | 10 | 77 | 39 | 72 | 0.327 | 0.544 | 0.129 | -0.9643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 21 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 3 | 6 | 19 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 45 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.578607 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.418572 | 0 | 0.311885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128185 | 0.14387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.394686 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | _omniavincitamor | 2019/09/19 | Stuck, No Longer Wish to Live I have been in eating disorder treatment since May, with previous time spent in treatment in years past. Recovery seems impossible, especially when you haven't any prospects. I feel hopeless in all aspects of life; I no longer want to return to college, yet I know that I do not do well wit... | 5.544712 | 5.917499 | 6.26133 | 79.088785 | 67.442029 | 9.537596 | 30.728048 | 9.478462 | 2.608708 | 1,105 | 40 | 218 | 21 | 17 | 363 | 147 | 276 | 0.097 | 0.749 | 0.154 | 0.9735 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 35 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 31 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 48 | 51 | 10 | 0 | 7 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 28 | 9 | 37 | 37 | 7 | 39 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 15 | 0 | 7 | 22 | 161 | 42 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111909 | 0 | 0 | 0.089908 | 0 | 0 | 0.146958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123836 | 0 | 0.094557 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110564 | 0 | 0 | 0.191403 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054634 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114162 | 0 | 0.10732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15264 | 0.052789 | 0 | 0.190823 | 0 | 0 | 0.120882 | 0 | 0 | 0.390083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.353099 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218203 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101399 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234019 | 0.103147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102144 | 0 | 0.103484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.232014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089381 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071785 | 0 | 0.10616 | 0 | 0.126011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105551 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097151 | 0 | 0.0975 | 0 | 0.248508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139163 |
suicidewatch | XNOOLIN | 2019/09/19 | i'm going to kill myself tonight I dont want to write a long story but to summarize, i had a hell life in colorado regardless of the weed. I dont care if you like colorado you can fuck yourself because i did not have nothing good heppen to me there. I just got treated like shit and i was there for 25 years of my life a... | 3.113111 | 4.030886 | 4.305023 | 88.964745 | 73.227405 | 6.922706 | 24.789759 | 7.057929 | 0.853638 | 3,843 | 112 | 839 | 35 | 74 | 1,262 | 363 | 1,029 | 0.21 | 0.693 | 0.096 | -0.9993 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 77 | 2 | 5 | 7 | 12 | 48 | 58 | 23 | 1 | 45 | 0 | 118 | 37 | 13 | 5 | 12 | 141 | 190 | 83 | 7 | 17 | 32 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 8 | 18 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 32 | 56 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 4 | 6 | 16 | 29 | 29 | 1 | 3 | 51 | 9 | 138 | 29 | 120 | 116 | 18 | 132 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 7 | 40 | 49 | 18 | 16 | 68 | 601 | 170 | 15 | 0.032803 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.029078 | 0 | 0.032848 | 0 | 0 | 0.026233 | 0.05459 | 0.177711 | 0.199297 | 0.022307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065064 | 0.045873 | 0 | 0.026994 | 0 | 0.030666 | 0 | 0 | 0.126118 | 0.082168 | 0.199964 | 0 | 0 | 0.036958 | 0 | 0.029012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.033496 | 0.037518 | 0.167225 | 0 | 0 | 0.056514 | 0.034393 | 0 | 0 | 0.026191 | 0 | 0 | 0.042311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.034272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.033569 | 0.269115 | 0 | 0.038041 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.029054 | 0.033894 | 0 | 0.021666 | 0.059345 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064175 | 0.030924 | 0 | 0.016586 | 0.023435 | 0 | 0.107802 | 0 | 0.083707 | 0 | 0 | 0.025344 | 0.090978 | 0.068553 | 0.031468 | 0.130499 | 0.220109 | 0.131178 | 0 | 0.036136 | 0.03248 | 0.145038 | 0 | 0.05877 | 0 | 0 | 0.034868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.032904 | 0.032581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097656 | 0.058314 | 0.181459 | 0 | 0.018028 | 0.080217 | 0 | 0.069467 | 0.071281 | 0.067087 | 0.278037 | 0.08013 | 0.032877 | 0.115863 | 0.058059 | 0 | 0.036698 | 0 | 0.055776 | 0.059212 | 0.031039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035732 | 0 | 0 | 0.066116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052366 | 0.104593 | 0.048228 | 0.024323 | 0.101199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094426 | 0 | 0 | 0.034934 | 0 | 0.049896 | 0 | 0 | 0.036424 | 0 | 0 | 0.045483 | 0.057285 | 0.068544 | 0 | 0.03101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035367 | 0 | 0.038345 | 0.032976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.028014 | 0 | 0.052173 | 0 | 0.033198 | 0.05228 | 0.029863 | 0.034221 | 0.037058 | 0.404063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111176 | 0 | 0 | 0.03672 | 0.116091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.034293 | 0 | 0.035881 | 0.074449 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.026366 | 0.028671 | 0 | 0 | 0.038087 | 0 | 0.021019 | 0.032229 | 0 | 0.019128 | 0.113107 | 0 | 0.031345 | 0 | 0.066813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.028331 | 0 | 0.054132 | 0.077392 | 0 | 0.026313 | 0 | 0.029494 | 0 | 0.0296 | 0.073247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119405 | 0 | 0 | 0.093209 | 0 | 0.199297 | 0.147869 |
suicidewatch | SophiaHassan | 2019/09/19 | Nembutal Where can I find Nembutal/ Pbarbituates. In Canada? Can anyone help? Please advise.. I am really suffering | 4.405 | 4.715999 | 7.213333 | 48.69 | 137.333333 | 12.311111 | 25.222222 | 8.3441 | 6.067156 | 93 | 4 | 10 | 5 | 6 | 33 | 16 | 18 | 0.156 | 0.598 | 0.246 | 0.2422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.379828 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.496488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.364105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.596286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.347997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway112682 | 2019/09/19 | I just want this to be over I've dealt with depression for 23 years (I'm in my 30's). I get close to ending it twice, but I move forward. I drink alcohol to cope, and keep moving forward still drinking. I FINALLY FIND THE CAUSE. Depression fades as i come to terms with being transgender. I HAVE TO SUPPRESS my transi... | 0.331039 | 2.724104 | 2.278658 | 92.326948 | 90.190476 | 5.911688 | 21.525253 | 7.348243 | 0.925213 | 960 | 35 | 205 | 18 | 33 | 318 | 120 | 252 | 0.24 | 0.694 | 0.066 | -0.995 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 38 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 13 | 3 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 16 | 20 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 46 | 46 | 13 | 0 | 10 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 16 | 10 | 4 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 30 | 4 | 36 | 40 | 2 | 31 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 14 | 3 | 2 | 15 | 133 | 45 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.443998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078067 | 0.063892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084717 | 0.085358 | 0 | 0.143152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.286266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.40699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073594 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091023 | 0.075944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153633 | 0.086824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082036 | 0 | 0.088322 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073856 | 0 | 0 | 0.09133 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084967 | 0.05869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069776 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176626 | 0 | 0.246445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07932 | 0.057605 | 0.072552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066357 | 0.069468 | 0 | 0.086865 | 0 | 0 | 0.188582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.382006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053508 |
suicidewatch | banditpunk | 2019/09/19 | I love them they don’t love me My existence has meant nothing. In a few months, I’ll be forgotten by those I love who don’t care about me anymore. It’s what I deserve, I hurt people and they have hurt me. I won’t be a burden.
I’ll go to my crush’s birthday party this weekend, and before I leave I’ll see if there is th... | 1.684961 | 3.241349 | 3.476581 | 90.898276 | 78.034853 | 6.378318 | 23.720593 | 7.168622 | 0.777303 | 1,369 | 45 | 307 | 16 | 32 | 459 | 181 | 373 | 0.15 | 0.7 | 0.15 | 0.0087 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 51 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 5 | 9 | 29 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 1 | 33 | 8 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 50 | 66 | 22 | 2 | 10 | 17 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 19 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 15 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 4 | 61 | 16 | 37 | 46 | 6 | 45 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 5 | 38 | 19 | 0 | 11 | 17 | 206 | 80 | 1 | 0 | 0.116684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082227 | 0.120066 | 0 | 0.0838 | 0 | 0.10335 | 0 | 0 | 0.10939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063512 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203514 | 0 | 0 | 0.089082 | 0.082974 | 0 | 0.088508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09959 | 0.070355 | 0 | 0 | 0.09001 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152172 | 0 | 0 | 0.094472 | 0.223876 | 0.082601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097814 | 0.096984 | 0 | 0.210852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054122 | 0.16055 | 0 | 0.104277 | 0.107 | 0 | 0.06956 | 0.096226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110175 | 0 | 0 | 0.355531 | 0 | 0.065737 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078606 | 0 | 0 | 0.219067 | 0.075954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133466 | 0.074899 | 0 | 0 | 0.109351 | 0 | 0 | 0.136548 | 0.171979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110241 | 0 | 0 | 0.078647 | 0.082334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093348 | 0 | 0 | 0.066862 | 0 | 0 | 0.102522 | 0 | 0.085056 | 0 | 0 | 0.058087 | 0.078169 | 0.078995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088864 | 0.10995 | 0 | 0 | 0.106798 | 0 | 0 | 0.10036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063418 |
suicidewatch | No------4847 | 2019/09/19 | I can’t do this anymore Everyday is the same. I have nothing to live for. I’m a worthless human being who brings nothing to this world. I wish I was gone and never existed. I didn’t ask to be born | -0.371163 | 1.680145 | 2.582605 | 91.86414 | 88.302326 | 5.300465 | 22.553488 | 6.742158 | 0.687106 | 153 | 6 | 34 | 2 | 5 | 54 | 33 | 43 | 0.077 | 0.851 | 0.072 | -0.0516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 25 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.345544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.325731 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.307666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268727 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.668647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.400672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | samthedodobirdkiller | 2019/09/19 | im so alone ive lost all my friends the past few months and im feeling like I have no one, no friends and I have no one to talk to. I lost my best friend of 5 years yesterday due to family things and I doubt I will ever be able to see her again. life has been so shitty lately I don't even know what to do, I just lay in... | -2.024667 | -0.399198 | 1.133077 | 102.375256 | 91.615385 | 4.389744 | 14.051282 | 5.683918 | -1.198856 | 416 | 7 | 116 | 3 | 15 | 147 | 73 | 130 | 0.199 | 0.662 | 0.138 | -0.7325 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 16 | 21 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 17 | 7 | 13 | 14 | 4 | 15 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 72 | 19 | 1 | 0.118754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117772 | 0.083035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078436 | 0.107419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11195 | 0 | 0.060045 | 0.084838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134981 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.641371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065264 | 0 | 0.133959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083879 | 0.174051 | 0 | 0.104862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120185 | 0.189262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09545 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069246 | 0.13649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076473 |
suicidewatch | ja599 | 2019/09/19 | Help Please? I’m struggling so hard tonight. I don’t have anyone to go to because I don’t want to talk to my parents and my only friends don’t care enough about me to answer. I could use some encouragement and reasons to keep going because I just can’t find any right now. | 2.201053 | 3.988516 | 3.140211 | 92.853474 | 77.245614 | 5.261754 | 25.435088 | 5.683918 | 0.494589 | 217 | 8 | 47 | 1 | 5 | 69 | 40 | 57 | 0.078 | 0.666 | 0.256 | 0.8668 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 11 | 13 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 3 | 7 | 12 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 27 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190403 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.271061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159844 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181371 | 0 | 0 | 0.264798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203656 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205965 | 0 | 0 | 0.140658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | reinino | 2019/09/19 | I'm scared I just took ~240 atarax and ~35 Ativan pills and I'm scared. I'm scared it's gonna hurt and I don't have anyone to talk to. I might end up brain dead but I don't wanna live anymore. I called the suicide hotline but I heard them talking about calling the police. I don't want to be found... Alive at least. It'... | -1.978729 | -0.130072 | 0.313443 | 104.333189 | 100.958763 | 2.999038 | 12.652234 | 4.604125 | -1.657485 | 334 | 6 | 85 | 1 | 15 | 110 | 55 | 97 | 0.256 | 0.708 | 0.036 | -0.9572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 22 | 6 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 10 | 14 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 48 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158836 | 0.111988 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178792 | 0.327083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283709 | 0.165488 | 0 | 0.105784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175607 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.34291 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141424 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.33981 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.481045 | 0 | 0.127627 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257462 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188933 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | SerBlazealot | 2019/09/19 | I'm really trying to hold out hope I've never opened up about myself online before so this is new to me. I'm really trying to be strong, to cope as best as I can and carry on. But every day chips away at my resolve and I really don't know how long I can keep fighting.
I've felt suicidal thoughts come on before, and I... | 2.675884 | 4.149106 | 4.021086 | 88.390394 | 75.141479 | 7.291113 | 21.764759 | 7.976526 | 0.874164 | 1,181 | 29 | 253 | 18 | 25 | 389 | 157 | 311 | 0.079 | 0.744 | 0.178 | 0.9883 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 33 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 16 | 26 | 4 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 54 | 43 | 23 | 2 | 2 | 14 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 14 | 0 | 3 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 9 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 29 | 17 | 44 | 33 | 9 | 47 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 16 | 22 | 0 | 3 | 21 | 177 | 47 | 2 | 0.095374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158717 | 0 | 0 | 0.064857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084903 | 0 | 0 | 0.089607 | 0.146673 | 0.159266 | 0 | 0.105333 | 0.243468 | 0 | 0.100089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09724 | 0 | 0 | 0.082156 | 0 | 0.103065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083462 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084473 | 0.098547 | 0 | 0.062994 | 0 | 0.080357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08991 | 0 | 0.048224 | 0 | 0.183148 | 0 | 0.08717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147371 | 0 | 0 | 0.182983 | 0.054203 | 0.15999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101527 | 0.085436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094728 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094644 | 0.084773 | 0 | 0.099317 | 0.10483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046595 | 0.09559 | 0 | 0.168806 | 0 | 0.106699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076126 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147116 | 0.092113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.323139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083277 | 0.199291 | 0 | 0 | 0.10752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081449 | 0 | 0.075845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099705 | 0 | 0.208647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109068 | 0 | 0.190086 | 0.061112 | 0 | 0.151432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105964 | 0.129505 | 0.103739 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122835 |
suicidewatch | throwaway229883879 | 2019/09/19 | I feel like a disgusting human being and I can't see a way out i used to pretend to be into all kinds of fucked up sexual shit for attention because i thought it made me look cool. i pretended to be into hardcore bdsm, blood, amputation, needles, latex. and i just feel sick to the stomach when i think about it. i talke... | 2.626351 | 4.010862 | 4.439756 | 85.701116 | 75.097561 | 7.485178 | 24.810507 | 8.13951 | 1.423744 | 618 | 20 | 129 | 10 | 13 | 210 | 90 | 164 | 0.192 | 0.695 | 0.113 | -0.9539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 12 | 5 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 12 | 8 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 30 | 34 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 13 | 26 | 7 | 26 | 19 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 7 | 8 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 91 | 34 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27462 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.455572 | 0.214558 | 0.144183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156375 | 0.082528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252204 | 0 | 0 | 0.127666 | 0 | 0.284182 | 0.100237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154144 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.362094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096221 | 0 | 0.238431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129696 | 0 | 0 | 0.088572 | 0.119195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | pppeanutbbbutter | 2019/09/19 | I'm just going to take my anger out on here. Just talk about everything I hate and why I want to fucking die. I hate my school. Everyone there always makes fun of me for being fat. Now, I have a eating disorder. I just want the world to go away. There's a girl named Skyler and she's fucking retarded. Yeah Skyler, I don... | 0.534808 | 2.781868 | 2.133428 | 95.311193 | 86.005208 | 5.053409 | 21.227273 | 6.464625 | 0.261856 | 1,435 | 48 | 317 | 15 | 44 | 466 | 176 | 384 | 0.166 | 0.72 | 0.114 | -0.9765 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 51 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 20 | 26 | 11 | 2 | 23 | 4 | 19 | 12 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 50 | 69 | 13 | 4 | 8 | 15 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 7 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 16 | 16 | 0 | 6 | 9 | 2 | 53 | 10 | 40 | 56 | 3 | 42 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 23 | 23 | 5 | 3 | 10 | 187 | 60 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076371 | 0 | 0 | 0.063371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144703 | 0 | 0.064298 | 0.187773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061484 | 0 | 0 | 0.049664 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239766 | 0 | 0.088258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157596 | 0.06433 | 0 | 0.068206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069658 | 0 | 0.220753 | 0.06921 | 0 | 0.072596 | 0 | 0.038937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.355962 | 0.2414 | 0.073873 | 0.175061 | 0 | 0 | 0.084901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228088 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072867 | 0.051403 | 0 | 0 | 0.083884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059393 | 0 | 0.081899 | 0 | 0 | 0.073891 | 0.175348 | 0 | 0.082011 | 0.313095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087235 | 0.131528 | 0 | 0 | 0.077098 | 0.233808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080505 | 0 | 0.084234 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115801 | 0.061896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181685 | 0.061125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069488 | 0 | 0.088555 | 0.074233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | prettyhoneybee | 2019/09/19 | Ugh. *Sunlight upon my eyelids*
*My eyes flutter open*
*Sleep lifts from my head*
*Great - *
*another morning I wish I were dead*
Idk something about actually thinking about and writing words like that scares me and I rationalize I don’t actually want any of that. Why am I constantly plagued with these feelings. I... | 0.262294 | -0.840178 | 1.447453 | 89.785552 | 150.746032 | 4.320058 | 25.085859 | 5.852545 | 1.478403 | 271 | 14 | 49 | 5 | 22 | 85 | 51 | 63 | 0.235 | 0.671 | 0.095 | -0.8622 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 8 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 2 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 26 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.469772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163683 | 0.252392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260108 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.26537 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247025 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240871 | 0 | 0 | 0.185301 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.276646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14197 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217192 | 0 | 0.27679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | FizzJamVan | 2019/09/19 | Don't let it eat you Don't cower from your Demons. Even when you think they may overwhelm you, let it. Cry, feel like shit, want to die. Ride your wave, but please remember how great it feels once the wave is over. Relish the good when it happens, learn from the bad in retrospect. Your feelings, everyone's feelings, al... | 2.424731 | 4.665642 | 2.650753 | 94.462796 | 78.354839 | 5.853763 | 22.16129 | 6.937598 | 0.476497 | 369 | 11 | 78 | 4 | 9 | 112 | 67 | 93 | 0.174 | 0.635 | 0.19 | 0.431 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 23 | 22 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 13 | 4 | 7 | 17 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 49 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14347 | 0.104745 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113491 | 0 | 0 | 0.16419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.434408 | 0.122754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144122 | 0 | 0.378883 | 0 | 0 | 0.151947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.351413 | 0 | 0.083947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162588 | 0.114697 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182992 | 0 | 0.130683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101349 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Mindopali | 2019/09/19 | How do I prepare my family for my suicide? I'm in a psych ward right now, but after fighting depression and a shitty head for over a decade, I'm just tired of putting that little effort in that everyone asks me to do.
I took the decision to end it, I don't want tot fight anymore, I prepared my exit, I'm just waiting ... | 4.377586 | 3.855478 | 6.251172 | 81.236069 | 69.91954 | 9.258851 | 31.193103 | 8.841846 | 2.379452 | 316 | 12 | 68 | 5 | 5 | 111 | 55 | 87 | 0.23 | 0.716 | 0.055 | -0.9543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 13 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 14 | 12 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 46 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222246 | 0 | 0 | 0.438523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121517 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233814 | 0.26055 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198627 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267324 | 0 | 0 | 0.258412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137185 | 0.184616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | GoGetTherapy | 2019/09/19 | My last post on reddit. The pain of losing a friend, the pain of losing a loved one. The last thing I was told was I don’t want to hurt you again. Sad thing is, everyday I’m hurt by you. Thinking about you vs thinking about ending my life is much easier. 🌹 | 0.023697 | 2.03205 | 1.930455 | 97.549015 | 85.909091 | 5.121212 | 14.621212 | 6.427356 | -0.725606 | 197 | 3 | 47 | 2 | 6 | 65 | 37 | 55 | 0.31 | 0.529 | 0.16 | -0.8885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 7 | 8 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 29 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.419429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.319368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.438323 | 0 | 0 | 0.176807 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132747 | 0 | 0.416902 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260294 | 0.251049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 12july1804 | 2019/09/19 | This is my fucking life Imagine you’re unmotivated, alone and miserable but that you think that everyone is out to get you, and even if they weren’t, you don’t have it in you to change yourself because you’re trash and stupid and dumb but then you just kind of give up and hate everyone ? Of course everything flips over... | 3.960734 | 5.601601 | 4.228831 | 87.516718 | 72.128492 | 7.572386 | 27.869513 | 8.192908 | 1.722827 | 722 | 27 | 147 | 11 | 14 | 225 | 108 | 179 | 0.207 | 0.637 | 0.156 | -0.9224 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 14 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 10 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 11 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 36 | 26 | 25 | 1 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 17 | 3 | 18 | 22 | 1 | 21 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 22 | 10 | 3 | 1 | 9 | 93 | 27 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115308 | 0 | 0.182826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152892 | 0 | 0.158635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099046 | 0 | 0 | 0.429873 | 0.134772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277267 | 0.078347 | 0.143853 | 0.085224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14881 | 0 | 0.165906 | 0.156158 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158783 | 0 | 0 | 0.105919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157355 | 0 | 0.101615 | 0.11405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164608 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169873 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192174 | 0 | 0 | 0.087441 | 0.344708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088449 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096568 |
suicidewatch | Marsplanetbars | 2019/09/19 | I can't handle it I'm going to be 18 in March. I'm not ready for the big world. I'll never be ready. I overreact to such small things. I probably don't even have an anxiety disorder. I'm probably just fine and just stupid. My stepfather finally knocked some sense into me. I just need to calm down. Just brush it off. Ju... | -0.812325 | 1.308477 | 2.280846 | 92.120772 | 93.0625 | 6.136765 | 17.685662 | 7.510576 | 0.504933 | 458 | 13 | 106 | 10 | 17 | 162 | 77 | 128 | 0.221 | 0.733 | 0.046 | -0.9661 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 21 | 18 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 2 | 14 | 13 | 2 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 63 | 15 | 0 | 0.205285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171489 | 0 | 0.181822 | 0 | 0 | 0.135589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189783 | 0 | 0 | 0.116668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152216 | 0.158329 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.442664 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.467319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | platonicpenpal | 2019/09/19 | But who do you talk to? The depression has isolated me. I keep writing messages to people I haven’t spoken to in years and erase them. I text the help line. I share a self deprecating meme on Facebook. How do you reach out and say *please just sit with me*. I am so broken that I can’t think straight and I just need som... | -0.748821 | 1.408954 | 1.480394 | 97.411414 | 94.038168 | 5.048516 | 16.438083 | 6.691623 | -0.281743 | 474 | 12 | 114 | 7 | 18 | 158 | 89 | 131 | 0.205 | 0.7 | 0.095 | -0.954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 14 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 21 | 22 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 19 | 3 | 11 | 20 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 12 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 76 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239459 | 0.14059 | 0 | 0.18776 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143985 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113894 | 0.209123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.323284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228751 | 0 | 0.14772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151132 | 0 | 0 | 0.239295 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17336 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279367 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280766 |
suicidewatch | spaceface1123 | 2019/09/19 | I've been suicidal for most of my life and i seriously think im ready to kill myself I've seen therapists, im working with a psychiatrist, i have an extremely supportive family and boyfriend, i have a bright future ahead of me. But i still think about suicide constantly. I either feel like im walking through the fog wa... | 5.91309 | 5.5609 | 7.129528 | 75.651146 | 66.696629 | 10.266067 | 34.653933 | 9.888513 | 3.310598 | 697 | 30 | 136 | 14 | 10 | 238 | 106 | 178 | 0.225 | 0.652 | 0.123 | -0.9734 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 15 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 13 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 25 | 28 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 9 | 20 | 8 | 25 | 17 | 7 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 7 | 8 | 91 | 24 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0.096208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098722 | 0 | 0.108794 | 0 | 0.082033 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100517 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09294 | 0 | 0.249245 | 0.211294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076169 | 0.091143 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10554 | 0 | 0.532459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218146 | 0 | 0 | 0.080362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069636 | 0.144495 | 0 | 0.17411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083816 | 0.088979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110817 | 0 | 0 | 0.083533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.431357 | 0.111876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114468 | 0 | 0.126342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TeenGohanruto_SS2 | 2019/09/19 | Is there a painless way to commit suicide? Is there?
I'm ready to bow out. It's been a very bumpy ride and I've had enough.
I've had enough of feeling inferior to everyone else in life. I've had enough of feeling unliked and unloved and unwanted. I'm tired of going thru life having few friends. I'm tired of going t... | 0.324586 | 2.6409 | 1.973434 | 95.417368 | 88.298246 | 5.362406 | 20.423559 | 6.86897 | 0.34403 | 428 | 14 | 96 | 6 | 14 | 139 | 66 | 114 | 0.175 | 0.636 | 0.189 | -0.7149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 20 | 25 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 6 | 5 | 16 | 20 | 6 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 49 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143059 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117214 | 0 | 0 | 0.579927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134076 | 0.126105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.354735 | 0.10024 | 0.134723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297324 | 0.137101 | 0 | 0 | 0.124173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093661 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089889 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.32254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115774 | 0.165522 | 0.111375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | My_Final_Stand | 2019/09/19 | Final Stand I wish I would shot myself two years ago. | 2.053636 | 3.959783 | 2.645455 | 95.688182 | 78.090909 | 4.4 | 11 | 3.1291 | -1.711255 | 42 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 10 | 11 | 0 | 0.748 | 0.252 | 0.4019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.389414 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.481233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.429133 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.505174 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.312067 | 0 | 0 | 0.282895 |
suicidewatch | samedude131216 | 2019/09/19 | I wish I was an only child with neglectful parents so I have no one to upset when I kill myself. Just really want to end it without affecting others around me. I'm so dead on the inside, there nothing left of me anymore. I can't live any longer when all I want is death but can't do anything about it. | 2.338125 | 3.56964 | 4.152 | 88.093 | 75.5625 | 6.995 | 23.7375 | 7.554174 | 0.985004 | 236 | 7 | 51 | 3 | 5 | 80 | 50 | 64 | 0.218 | 0.713 | 0.069 | -0.8639 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 10 | 5 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 8 | 9 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 38 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263837 | 0 | 0 | 0.218926 | 0.236829 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180273 | 0.202333 | 0 | 0 | 0.295402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.313831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.305929 | 0.25645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway76402 | 2019/09/19 | I hold no purpose in this life. I made the worst mistake of my life in February 2018. At the time, it was the middle of my junior year of high school, and I suffered a mental breakdown and had to leave school. I was #1 in my class at the time and possibly could’ve been valedictorian if I stayed.
I started doing onlin... | 0.882756 | 2.835935 | 3.219532 | 89.884982 | 82.141361 | 5.487021 | 21.570956 | 6.596605 | 0.423706 | 701 | 22 | 151 | 7 | 19 | 241 | 99 | 191 | 0.17 | 0.7 | 0.13 | -0.7487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 12 | 5 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 19 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 18 | 40 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 25 | 4 | 25 | 29 | 4 | 32 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 12 | 2 | 1 | 13 | 108 | 33 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095234 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113975 | 0 | 0.116677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184308 | 0.220541 | 0 | 0 | 0.203365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10602 | 0 | 0 | 0.065552 | 0 | 0 | 0.252596 | 0 | 0 | 0.421248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.482863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168851 | 0.127135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110572 | 0 | 0 | 0.137164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153622 |
suicidewatch | plzHelp4442 | 2019/09/19 | What’s the most effective way of doing it I’m not going to give a story. If anyone can reply with the most effective way of killing oneself I’d appreciate it. I want to die and I don’t want any chance of surviving. Whether or not it is painful isn’t necessarily important as long as the method will kill me. Any tips are... | 1.929006 | 4.2057 | 4.500663 | 80.351739 | 80.304348 | 8.000828 | 25.799172 | 8.841846 | 2.197317 | 270 | 11 | 55 | 7 | 7 | 95 | 50 | 69 | 0.153 | 0.566 | 0.281 | 0.6996 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 13 | 12 | 7 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 11 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 36 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.339786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23966 | 0.141984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.5528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.294712 | 0.396607 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | jfsuuc | 2019/09/19 | I brought up being suicidal to my mom Im 22 and still live with my mom, have been depressed for at least 10 years now and attempted it 3 times, after the last failed attempt i finally said something about it to my mom, she told me that i could drive head on into a bus or drive off a cliff those would work and that "wha... | 3.705721 | 3.778106 | 4.856224 | 88.616379 | 71.376682 | 8.165151 | 27.139334 | 7.957252 | 1.367898 | 813 | 25 | 187 | 10 | 14 | 269 | 127 | 223 | 0.146 | 0.817 | 0.037 | -0.974 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 8 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 23 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 31 | 35 | 15 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 3 | 33 | 4 | 30 | 21 | 6 | 29 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 13 | 0 | 4 | 12 | 136 | 46 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083674 | 0 | 0 | 0.067587 | 0 | 0.180527 | 0.106369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094797 | 0.176596 | 0.20028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080968 | 0 | 0.054753 | 0 | 0.05956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223122 | 0.09388 | 0 | 0.107554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.339604 | 0 | 0.207994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.368219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077707 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142029 | 0.079705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099688 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078796 | 0.168467 | 0.274798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122219 | 0 | 0.099337 | 0.10014 | 0 | 0 | 0.113992 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15259 | 0 | 0 | 0.074446 | 0 | 0 | 0.067487 |
suicidewatch | player1116 | 2019/09/19 | Looking for hope I’m desperately trying to cling to some hope. Has anyone been able to pull themselves out of this space successfully? It’s been a perfect storm of things happening and most recently, my financial life came crashing down to the point where I haven’t been able to afford groceries or a haircut in over a m... | 4.679413 | 5.762613 | 5.510163 | 81.160897 | 69.695652 | 8.532609 | 30.896739 | 8.841846 | 2.458326 | 462 | 19 | 90 | 8 | 8 | 151 | 75 | 115 | 0.118 | 0.747 | 0.135 | 0.2555 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 16 | 19 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 8 | 5 | 18 | 13 | 2 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 60 | 16 | 1 | 0.414475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173035 | 0.12633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237025 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183259 | 0 | 0 | 0.204604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.411667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225164 | 0.211914 | 0.146378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216519 | 0 | 0.195906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Eeehhhhhhhhhh | 2019/09/19 | Not much time left. I don't really think things are going to look up from where they are now to be honest. I used to hold myself back by thinking about what my death would do to my mum or what stumbling upon my body would inflict upon who finds it. But those ideas have been losing more power as time goes on.
There's o... | 3.094553 | 4.119567 | 3.842439 | 91.856016 | 73.390244 | 6.76748 | 21.796748 | 6.937598 | 0.355514 | 462 | 10 | 103 | 4 | 9 | 147 | 90 | 123 | 0.051 | 0.817 | 0.132 | 0.8519 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 17 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 18 | 27 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 11 | 6 | 20 | 19 | 3 | 18 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 74 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205653 | 0.145283 | 0 | 0 | 0.18587 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200272 | 0 | 0 | 0.229572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165768 | 0 | 0 | 0.220955 | 0 | 0 | 0.099353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170774 | 0.227511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149495 | 0.150791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137804 | 0.154667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270211 | 0.260614 | 0 | 0 | 0.237165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17564 | 0 | 0.167796 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.288927 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | NukaColaFreak | 2019/09/19 | Its not getting any better Ive been through all the anti depressants. All of them. None of them worked. There are no more left to try. The last options i have left are some medical clinic shit. I dont want to go to the hospital again for any reasons. I have no money. My biggest fear is if i fuck it up, ill be sent to t... | -0.957546 | 1.108724 | 1.57 | 97.507308 | 92.7 | 5.076923 | 19.692308 | 6.671995 | 0.155554 | 353 | 12 | 85 | 5 | 13 | 120 | 65 | 100 | 0.326 | 0.652 | 0.022 | -0.9841 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 12 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 13 | 20 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 12 | 2 | 11 | 16 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 58 | 15 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.377239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144642 | 0 | 0 | 0.181101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297571 | 0.084084 | 0 | 0.091465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.347684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131187 | 0 | 0 | 0.349721 | 0 | 0 | 0.078627 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162129 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.369951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | something-here123 | 2019/09/19 | Loneliness and worthlessness has killed me Idk what to say except I’m dead inside... I hate the constant loneliness and feeling of being worthless...
I’m generally just someone people don’t like... my existence brings nothing good to anyone and everyone would be better of with me dead....
I’m selfish for even staying... | 2.862833 | 5.926441 | 4.12 | 77.398333 | 89.5 | 6.666667 | 28.333333 | 7.793538 | 2.804833 | 267 | 13 | 40 | 6 | 9 | 87 | 46 | 60 | 0.349 | 0.558 | 0.093 | -0.9602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 12 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 23 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246911 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.301693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184395 | 0 | 0 | 0.266767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236547 | 0 | 0 | 0.312518 | 0 | 0.297567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198321 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | hissingcobra | 2019/09/19 | You know you're really a fuck up when you can't even kill yourself correctly Right now as im writing this im trying to slit my wrists. I CANT EVEN FUCKING DO IT. I keep cutting them but I cant fucking go deep enough. I guess I really am a failure. | -0.233212 | 1.711331 | 2.574091 | 92.93447 | 86.454545 | 5.848485 | 21.893939 | 7.168622 | 0.688394 | 194 | 7 | 45 | 3 | 6 | 68 | 41 | 55 | 0.171 | 0.782 | 0.047 | -0.7307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 12 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 12 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 27 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221017 | 0 | 0.282559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.593243 | 0 | 0 | 0.121565 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.462099 | 0 | 0 | 0.190125 | 0.236649 | 0 | 0.117554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | panda_duvet | 2019/09/19 | I have told myself I won't ever kill myself I'm pretty sure I'm going to die by suicide. I've told my friends that this is likely the case. My therapist doesn't like to hear it. | 0.055 | 1.819947 | 2.765 | 93.05 | 84 | 5 | 17.5 | 5.985473 | -0.3625 | 140 | 3 | 32 | 1 | 4 | 49 | 30 | 40 | 0.215 | 0.532 | 0.253 | 0.2091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 18 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273644 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.291707 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.288408 | 0 | 0.248502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.306137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.503888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | MyHatedLife | 2019/09/19 | Today I told my mom ....that I wanted to kill myself, she asked me if I wanted to go to the hospital, I said no, they would just sit there and listen to me bitch and moan about my problems. They would try to stabilize my mood to send me back into the world just for my problems to keep being there, and ultimately for m... | 6.883673 | 5.331335 | 7.438828 | 78.161636 | 65.266667 | 10.670707 | 31.121212 | 9.573947 | 2.531 | 864 | 24 | 179 | 14 | 11 | 287 | 119 | 225 | 0.167 | 0.793 | 0.04 | -0.9531 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 27 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 14 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 22 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 37 | 35 | 12 | 2 | 16 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 30 | 2 | 32 | 20 | 4 | 24 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 129 | 39 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0.101023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09678 | 0 | 0 | 0.079603 | 0 | 0.126213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105708 | 0 | 0.105549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10744 | 0 | 0 | 0.10596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102731 | 0.092016 | 0.114533 | 0 | 0.056893 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111615 | 0.39623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220683 | 0 | 0.08655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118387 | 0.120198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098128 | 0.098921 | 0 | 0.281141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183181 | 0 | 0.08304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105499 | 0.588318 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | NegativeEnds | 2019/09/19 | Killing myself before 18 I've already made my notes and I'm ready to send it to my family I'm 17 I will turn 18 in 8 months my mother died when I was a young age so all I had was my sister and my dad my sister recently moved away with her boyfriend, my dad has picked up drinking and comes home at 6 am and bursts into t... | 2.135043 | 3.286482 | 3.490176 | 92.95668 | 75.943005 | 6.182936 | 21.674957 | 6.427356 | 0.192213 | 702 | 17 | 161 | 5 | 15 | 230 | 113 | 193 | 0.201 | 0.728 | 0.071 | -0.98 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 15 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 20 | 28 | 13 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 11 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 28 | 4 | 23 | 20 | 1 | 27 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 95 | 35 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262274 | 0 | 0.116541 | 0 | 0 | 0.237539 | 0 | 0 | 0.123444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120217 | 0 | 0.144859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107837 | 0 | 0.21877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140007 | 0 | 0 | 0.322106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124062 | 0.308842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111409 | 0.148348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158909 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092729 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203227 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | laverju | 2019/09/19 | Im scared My depression and anxiety keeps getting worse. I can barely function in my daily life, its too painful. I may really kill myself, im scared. | 1.522241 | 4.245856 | 3.513362 | 82.786595 | 89.344828 | 7.037931 | 24.491379 | 8.076483 | 2.2072 | 119 | 5 | 21 | 3 | 4 | 40 | 23 | 29 | 0.552 | 0.448 | 0 | -0.969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219689 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.551032 | 0 | 0 | 0.226715 | 0.282194 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.271409 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.510733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | timtamthebest | 2019/09/19 | Post Post Post
Months of failure has rotted me, made me a literal retard, unable of thought. Only able to comprehend his sad existence as something that is sometimes good. Oh, that feeling- good- how relative a word. I would go into the many examples about how good changes depending on perspective, but I really... | 5.796897 | 7.097372 | 5.798333 | 79.3175 | 67.275862 | 9.018391 | 33.657088 | 9.299571 | 3.097752 | 1,107 | 50 | 199 | 21 | 18 | 348 | 153 | 261 | 0.11 | 0.757 | 0.133 | 0.6893 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 30 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 22 | 3 | 1 | 9 | 9 | 62 | 44 | 17 | 1 | 7 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 16 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 4 | 21 | 8 | 34 | 30 | 11 | 25 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 5 | 8 | 144 | 37 | 2 | 0.107135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118322 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109397 | 0 | 0.109232 | 0 | 0.113335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055974 | 0 | 0.060887 | 0.26958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075673 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304122 | 0.214541 | 0.108618 | 0 | 0.116702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085514 | 0 | 0 | 0.079439 | 0.082629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.307818 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.487774 | 0.068634 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120425 | 0.107213 | 0 | 0 | 0.082478 | 0.10596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100974 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068648 | 0 | 0.340214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104656 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1232 | 0 | 0 | 0.077996 | 0 | 0 | 0.076106 | 0 | 0 | 0.068992 |
suicidewatch | LoveEliza | 2019/09/19 | Overdosed last week. Got back from the hospital and I have some hope now. So I overdosed Thursday night. Was pretty stupid, even ignoring the whole "suicide is bad" thing. Was never going to be enough pills to kill me. I guess I wasn't thinking clearly to have done it. The whole night is really foggy.
Woke up having a... | 3.83835 | 5.81653 | 4.819173 | 81.761994 | 73.16185 | 7.662587 | 27.537971 | 8.433252 | 2.075534 | 1,418 | 54 | 261 | 25 | 29 | 462 | 188 | 346 | 0.186 | 0.679 | 0.135 | -0.9719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 51 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 18 | 27 | 6 | 0 | 25 | 0 | 39 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 51 | 65 | 19 | 4 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 11 | 14 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 10 | 15 | 2 | 1 | 24 | 3 | 36 | 12 | 40 | 34 | 14 | 51 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 20 | 1 | 6 | 23 | 201 | 47 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080624 | 0.26394 | 0.07165 | 0 | 0 | 0.073021 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098147 | 0 | 0 | 0.090779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087817 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088668 | 0.095704 | 0.170036 | 0.155246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251825 | 0 | 0 | 0.130169 | 0.061305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089668 | 0 | 0.146309 | 0 | 0.137265 | 0 | 0.094533 | 0 | 0.075884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086078 | 0.085232 | 0 | 0 | 0.091865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189879 | 0.089361 | 0.094321 | 0.069949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08775 | 0 | 0.083848 | 0.344029 | 0 | 0.075942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063629 | 0.066184 | 0.082879 | 0 | 0.16106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058149 | 0 | 0.091311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081121 | 0 | 0 | 0.174606 | 0 | 0.082112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173695 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187731 | 0.19476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099636 | 0.114021 | 0.164957 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081341 | 0 | 0 | 0.058262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068115 | 0.068834 | 0 | 0.077156 | 0.07955 | 0 | 0.191615 | 0 | 0.082721 | 0 | 0.062473 | 0 | 0 | 0.182878 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Egoisticalwastaken | 2019/09/19 | I’m sorry, everyone. I’m just such a fucking failure. My mom spent hundreds of dollars on tutors on me and yet I’m still failing my Algebra class. I just betrayed my best friend, somebody who’s been supporting me for so long. I’m going to off myself before I hurt anybody else I care about. I’m usually talkative but tod... | 1.754032 | 3.639543 | 4.248233 | 83.942632 | 78.934211 | 6.711278 | 25.988722 | 7.709487 | 1.63913 | 573 | 23 | 112 | 9 | 14 | 201 | 92 | 152 | 0.204 | 0.697 | 0.099 | -0.9512 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 14 | 30 | 12 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 20 | 6 | 18 | 20 | 3 | 18 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 73 | 23 | 3 | 0.162113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137946 | 0 | 0.170127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.330569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135424 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125248 | 0.14987 | 0 | 0 | 0.184265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173545 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143148 | 0.143465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189864 | 0 | 0 | 0.238343 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184566 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124802 | 0 | 0.362943 | 0 | 0 | 0.129463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.307327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177245 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway72774 | 2019/09/19 | I’m done I can’t do this anymore. I’m so tired of waking up and living like this. I need to die. My boyfriend doesn’t love me anymore. My friends don’t love me anymore. No one wants me here. I’m a terrible fuckin person that deserves to die so I’m done. I’m tired of being used. I can’t take this pain anymore. | -1.714143 | 0.215929 | 0.794286 | 101.835714 | 97.428571 | 3.371429 | 18.428571 | 4.935629 | -0.748743 | 241 | 8 | 60 | 1 | 10 | 81 | 39 | 70 | 0.29 | 0.545 | 0.166 | -0.8875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 19 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 4 | 5 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 32 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.635588 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.33257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.327925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078276 | 0 | 0.141479 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.289213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118803 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108571 | 0 | 0.170487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1399 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.368303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13838 | 0 | 0 | 0.094503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | iam_yoshi1 | 2019/09/19 | My last request... My name does not matter. My age does not matter. I live in America. Where can I purchase an exit bag online? | -0.8436 | 0.860368 | 1.936 | 90.088 | 110.6 | 3.6 | 17 | 5.683918 | -0.063 | 96 | 3 | 18 | 1 | 5 | 33 | 19 | 25 | 0.093 | 0.907 | 0 | -0.0382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.82438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.383942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.415916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | AJ0TA | 2019/09/19 | I don’t know what to do I’m lost. I feel like I don’t belong anywhere anymore. I’ve lost my closest friends because I got this urge to just be alone and now I feel like my life doesn’t matter. I truly believe I won’t survive the next 10 days and I don’t know wether accepting that is a good thing or a bad thing anymore.... | 0.608427 | 2.045374 | 2.403834 | 97.929367 | 80.772152 | 5.020615 | 22.678119 | 5.288315 | -0.08018 | 275 | 9 | 68 | 1 | 7 | 91 | 49 | 79 | 0.13 | 0.644 | 0.227 | 0.7579 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 18 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 10 | 5 | 3 | 12 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 37 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21081 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.403721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169951 | 0.124078 | 0 | 0 | 0.229324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205836 | 0.290823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170723 | 0.162793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143769 | 0.198882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.444384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 16-934NorthwoodXt | 2019/09/19 | I'm going crazyyyyyyyy Been at college a month, I still don't know anyone. What hurts the most is seeing literally everyone around me in a group or with at least one other person. Everytime I see someone else eating alone if I wait a few minutes their friend comes and sits with them. Every day I watch them and I get an... | 0.533031 | 2.611468 | 2.581662 | 93.239536 | 84.337079 | 5.545121 | 19.480781 | 6.836019 | 0.190501 | 653 | 18 | 146 | 8 | 19 | 219 | 109 | 178 | 0.135 | 0.795 | 0.07 | -0.7906 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 26 | 32 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 7 | 11 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 4 | 21 | 2 | 18 | 24 | 3 | 26 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 10 | 15 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 90 | 28 | 2 | 0.136156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.282032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092591 | 0 | 0.104159 | 0 | 0 | 0.095203 | 0 | 0 | 0.363622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279739 | 0 | 0.117286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133381 | 0 | 0.139321 | 0.113741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229434 | 0.260205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105194 | 0 | 0.142271 | 0 | 0.07738 | 0 | 0.108896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157105 | 0.145757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184525 | 0.103553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094393 | 0.118886 | 0 | 0 | 0.128711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138794 | 0.115364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155866 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Dalos_ | 2019/09/19 | Tonight’s the night I do t know what will happen if I take all these pills but I’m going to. Thanks anyways | -0.74875 | 1.325258 | 0.805 | 103.54 | 91.083333 | 3.2 | 16.333333 | 3.1291 | -1.317817 | 85 | 2 | 21 | 0 | 3 | 27 | 22 | 24 | 0 | 0.824 | 0.176 | 0.5927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.295433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.459687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.487828 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.39085 | 0 | 0 | 0.478592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | sobij749 | 2019/09/19 | Why do people suicide before trying meth? Like just Go to fucking Fresno CA and do some meth first. You'll find motivation to live again real fast. Even if you don't, feel the happiest moment in your life times 100 before leaving. Why the fuck not? you deserve it and you have nothing to lose anyway.
You can find meth a... | 2.230187 | 4.975621 | 3.174757 | 87.217957 | 83.477612 | 4.54403 | 20.315299 | 5.985473 | 0.260076 | 277 | 8 | 49 | 2 | 8 | 88 | 49 | 67 | 0.151 | 0.758 | 0.092 | -0.7629 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 10 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 5 | 9 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 29 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.32678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097088 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.350995 | 0.163327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.355028 | 0 | 0 | 0.109126 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203315 | 0 | 0 | 0.135625 | 0.093808 | 0 | 0.169552 | 0 | 0 | 0.214815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.437108 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111965 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.346526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Cosmostravler | 2019/09/19 | Looking for a free global suicide hotline or even a chat platform believe it or not, there's not a single suicide hotline in my beloved country "Tunisia", not even a chat platform.. And what makes it worse, we don't have any international payment method.. Any help is appreciated.. Thank u ❤ | 5.634623 | 7.482528 | 5.83033 | 76.861722 | 68.245283 | 6.809434 | 39.665094 | 7.168622 | 3.0904 | 230 | 14 | 39 | 2 | 4 | 73 | 40 | 53 | 0.195 | 0.614 | 0.191 | -0.3182 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 24 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.375254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.310854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.364469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.603597 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281174 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | eclipsed419 | 2019/09/19 | A close friend of mine just admitted he is feeling suicidal Like the title reads..
I am no stranger to depression and have experience the suicides of two people that were close to me in my life. I am absolutely terrified for my friend and although I am honored he is confiding in me, I desperately don’t want to say the ... | 4.154147 | 5.618049 | 5.324762 | 80.55 | 71.365591 | 9.185253 | 29.414747 | 9.606745 | 2.708952 | 374 | 15 | 74 | 9 | 7 | 124 | 63 | 93 | 0.218 | 0.544 | 0.237 | -0.2135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 18 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 14 | 7 | 9 | 17 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 50 | 18 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186851 | 0 | 0 | 0.096584 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.295158 | 0 | 0 | 0.183241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128034 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134921 | 0.186642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264854 | 0 | 0 | 0.209679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151904 | 0 | 0 | 0.152216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.417883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.417694 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | beepboop1997 | 2019/10/05 | Doing it again I tried about two weeks ago. Gonna try again. Feel so fucking trapped in my life. I try to reach out for help and it’s just not there. Wish I was stronger but I just don’t have it anymore. Why does it get better for everyone else except me? I’m sure it’s my fault somehow - it always is. I try to do bette... | -2.570524 | -0.975464 | -0.254308 | 107.238538 | 106.741935 | 2.755108 | 12.264113 | 4.557287 | -1.81186 | 315 | 6 | 84 | 1 | 16 | 103 | 57 | 93 | 0.107 | 0.698 | 0.194 | 0.8144 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 13 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 3 | 11 | 11 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 52 | 16 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.35516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185625 | 0.104903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.545286 | 0 | 0.19614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159376 | 0.16106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181179 | 0 | 0.230896 | 0 | 0 | 0.146176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | saamii_xx | 2019/10/05 | One step forward, 15 steps back. I'm tired of existing. Tired of overwhelming emotions. Tired of feeling nothing. I want the suffering to end but I don't want to die.
Every time I make progress with my mental health, it flips again and I'm worse than before. It's hard, almost not worth the effort and pain.
Yeah, peo... | 1.243939 | 3.59963 | 2.660067 | 92.021212 | 83.747475 | 5.754882 | 19.43771 | 7.106946 | 0.383571 | 1,146 | 31 | 240 | 16 | 33 | 371 | 161 | 297 | 0.203 | 0.657 | 0.14 | -0.9604 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 45 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 12 | 18 | 1 | 1 | 14 | 2 | 24 | 12 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 46 | 41 | 19 | 3 | 5 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 7 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 21 | 8 | 46 | 30 | 5 | 34 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 16 | 0 | 5 | 13 | 156 | 38 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07941 | 0 | 0 | 0.08381 | 0.137184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100342 | 0.079008 | 0 | 0 | 0.058918 | 0 | 0.075158 | 0.170476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137837 | 0 | 0.186421 | 0 | 0.101393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094959 | 0.079909 | 0 | 0 | 0.09482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087848 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189022 | 0 | 0 | 0.078769 | 0.078943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084407 | 0.059544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120894 | 0 | 0.094919 | 0 | 0 | 0.096599 | 0 | 0.432899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089268 | 0.181864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084074 | 0 | 0 | 0.143397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052015 | 0.410107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097028 | 0.087139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105229 | 0.141612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064941 | 0 | 0.090906 | 0.190104 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | SK136 | 2019/10/05 | Happy deathday! My birthday is coming soon and I’m planning to kill myself the night before so it becomes my deathday. I was always betting that if my death would have more of a meaning than my life had, I would kill myself in my 18th birthday because I just can’t live another day. It’s unbearable, I feel totally empty... | 2.655116 | 3.920864 | 4.534023 | 85.532198 | 74.813953 | 7.020465 | 26.853488 | 7.554174 | 1.456764 | 483 | 18 | 100 | 6 | 10 | 165 | 79 | 129 | 0.218 | 0.673 | 0.108 | -0.9576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 18 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 25 | 25 | 8 | 5 | 9 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 21 | 4 | 7 | 16 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 80 | 30 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14713 | 0 | 0 | 0.120245 | 0.185413 | 0 | 0 | 0.175359 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107789 | 0.195286 | 0.300924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141178 | 0 | 0 | 0.114035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166692 | 0 | 0.089406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.391254 | 0 | 0.097177 | 0.144133 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124894 | 0 | 0 | 0.156137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192611 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193414 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208588 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.376827 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | marvtheslumpgod | 2019/10/05 | I really think that I‘ll soon be ready. Nothing more to add. I guess it‘s soon time. I feel that strange calmness inside me. I just got all my favorite photos out of my shelf and put them together with the letter that I‘ve written for my family. Let‘s see. | 1.670867 | 4.285723 | 2.528 | 91.780667 | 84.8 | 5.733333 | 20.333333 | 7.168622 | 0.619733 | 201 | 6 | 40 | 3 | 6 | 63 | 42 | 50 | 0.035 | 0.808 | 0.158 | 0.7506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 9 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 27 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.338185 | 0 | 0.181388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.286914 | 0 | 0.395189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.366833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.344217 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.360629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285867 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229864 | 0 | 0 | 0.209182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Eudald_X | 2019/10/05 | I hate the feeling I get from this but I'm better now 14 y/o here, this might get deleted, never posted on this sub, but I just want to share this and hope to help at least one person.
I was talking to this friend who was aware of my suicidal thoughts. I told her how I felt jealous about another friend that gets along... | 4.844342 | 5.609299 | 5.18348 | 84.814134 | 69.110294 | 8.544444 | 29.449346 | 8.680891 | 2.063747 | 1,081 | 39 | 221 | 17 | 18 | 343 | 154 | 272 | 0.252 | 0.556 | 0.192 | -0.9798 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 34 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 19 | 23 | 5 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 50 | 55 | 21 | 6 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 10 | 0 | 4 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 10 | 1 | 3 | 28 | 5 | 37 | 13 | 27 | 26 | 2 | 23 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 29 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 142 | 51 | 1 | 0.09167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055881 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100695 | 0.05912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09381 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092702 | 0 | 0.088018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100512 | 0.283296 | 0 | 0.143682 | 0.087938 | 0 | 0 | 0.146634 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081064 | 0.097585 | 0 | 0.181011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061445 | 0 | 0 | 0.091049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081481 | 0.101419 | 0 | 0.05038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064749 | 0.044785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097248 | 0.092561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070702 | 0 | 0.097492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186354 | 0.069719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063553 | 0.080043 | 0 | 0.100626 | 0 | 0 | 0.087795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078286 | 0 | 0.1458 | 0.091778 | 0.092775 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073208 | 0.153281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.401089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117477 | 0 | 0.363879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054069 | 0.072763 | 0 | 0 | 0.082422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186191 | 0 | 0 | 0.200454 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BreakYourDamnBack | 2019/10/05 | I just want to tell you: it's okay. If you're in pain, please read this, and know that the words come straight from my heart, and go out to yours.
It's okay to be sad.
It's okay to be hurt.
It's okay to not want to get up.
It's okay to cry.
It's okay to be angry.
It's okay to shut down for a bit.
It's okay to j... | -2.405455 | -0.646963 | -0.082732 | 107.727687 | 100.065574 | 3.366849 | 10.876138 | 5.033349 | -1.921756 | 405 | 5 | 113 | 2 | 18 | 133 | 59 | 122 | 0.175 | 0.545 | 0.28 | 0.56 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 22 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 13 | 7 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 14 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 19 | 10 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 60 | 19 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210086 | 0 | 0.218555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104591 | 0 | 0.227544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152253 | 0.213016 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167367 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174974 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.407746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236154 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.406604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Lurkerman18 | 2019/10/05 | Getting intoxicated and hanging the easiest way? Surely the easiest way to leave this shitty world is getting just intoxicated enough to be able to set up a hanging rope standing on a step ladder and kicking?
The alcohol would be to give you the guts to actually go through with it as long as you prepared properly the... | 3.366835 | 5.626154 | 4.405476 | 82.9425 | 75.405229 | 6.985808 | 28.57563 | 7.957252 | 1.962453 | 628 | 27 | 119 | 10 | 14 | 204 | 90 | 153 | 0.128 | 0.757 | 0.115 | -0.6325 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 13 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 17 | 21 | 12 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 1 | 21 | 14 | 4 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 80 | 16 | 1 | 0.143493 | 0 | 0.140029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127739 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.296533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224908 | 0.275303 | 0.08155 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151938 | 0 | 0 | 0.101353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157512 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15001 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.569491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104465 | 0 | 0 | 0.203867 | 0.313774 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | thomas-white-boi | 2019/10/05 | I’m fucking done, 14 and I just want to die I grew up surrounded by problems with my dad being an abusive asshat towards my mum and I, he would strangle me, hit me and all that shit...just glad my mom didn’t go through it but that was the final straw. About 2 years ago we moved from London to New Zealand and well I’ve ... | 2.018386 | 3.932608 | 3.378813 | 90.351217 | 78.229209 | 5.923804 | 23.125941 | 6.841164 | 0.674294 | 1,881 | 60 | 393 | 19 | 45 | 614 | 231 | 493 | 0.183 | 0.657 | 0.16 | -0.9218 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 43 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 20 | 35 | 9 | 2 | 19 | 0 | 32 | 17 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 75 | 79 | 29 | 3 | 13 | 13 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 21 | 29 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 10 | 19 | 3 | 3 | 26 | 3 | 69 | 16 | 66 | 44 | 12 | 86 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 9 | 34 | 36 | 6 | 5 | 34 | 266 | 90 | 7 | 0 | 0.07795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058318 | 0 | 0.131757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054742 | 0 | 0 | 0.044739 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065245 | 0 | 0 | 0.108278 | 0.058567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050588 | 0.054931 | 0.080209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144533 | 0.127286 | 0.067826 | 0.056664 | 0 | 0.068279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057573 | 0.067325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067319 | 0 | 0 | 0.11654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118255 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063168 | 0.144138 | 0 | 0.111921 | 0 | 0 | 0.050829 | 0.304106 | 0 | 0.063111 | 0.224338 | 0 | 0.052618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058177 | 0 | 0 | 0.064953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044097 | 0.13902 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058477 | 0 | 0 | 0.072312 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07148 | 0 | 0.185876 | 0.096424 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143634 | 0.055932 | 0.23751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066276 | 0 | 0 | 0.066429 | 0.077052 | 0.052512 | 0.139847 | 0.048363 | 0 | 0 | 0.12708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044581 | 0.050036 | 0 | 0 | 0.146103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068736 | 0 | 0.062192 | 0 | 0 | 0.066931 | 0 | 0.188855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056184 | 0 | 0.052318 | 0 | 0.332912 | 0.052426 | 0 | 0 | 0.074323 | 0.067532 | 0 | 0 | 0.065837 | 0 | 0 | 0.050648 | 0 | 0.073646 | 0.093132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06057 | 0.075236 | 0 | 0.087415 | 0 | 0 | 0.052229 | 0.038362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108566 | 0.194021 | 0.156662 | 0 | 0 | 0.177458 | 0.060987 | 0 | 0.073452 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047895 | 0 | 0 | 0.09347 | 0 | 0 | 0.127099 |
suicidewatch | lolikittenv | 2019/10/05 | Homeless I very well may be going homeless soon. I have no fallback family that did encourage me to be raped. Im at a friends I lost someone who meant so much to me. I cant find a way to live anymore. If I'm on the street I know for a fact I won't tell anyone and just jump off a bridge. I'm terrified im so scared. I'm ... | 0.606809 | 2.694469 | 2.888766 | 91.094 | 84.106383 | 6.029504 | 23.584397 | 7.3011 | 0.990439 | 519 | 20 | 114 | 8 | 15 | 177 | 93 | 141 | 0.225 | 0.671 | 0.104 | -0.9559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 11 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 12 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 21 | 29 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 15 | 4 | 12 | 21 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 70 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151218 | 0.106617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12847 | 0 | 0.137038 | 0 | 0.143743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117805 | 0 | 0.159327 | 0.438814 | 0.086657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151446 | 0 | 0 | 0.163231 | 0 | 0.329406 | 0 | 0 | 0.13553 | 0 | 0 | 0.167596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1077 | 0 | 0 | 0.134641 | 0 | 0 | 0.341169 | 0.166448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125811 | 0 | 0.12103 | 0.122309 | 0 | 0.137097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BIGRESE | 2019/10/05 | Indecisive Today is the one day in a long time that I actually want to slit my wrist vertically rip out my veins and arteries and drown in a bathtub filled with my agony and blood. To long have I been holding these feelings in and not exprès them I don’t even feel like writing works for my anymore like it once did.
I ... | 5.643732 | 5.251168 | 5.736256 | 85.551144 | 67.262911 | 8.790141 | 27.139671 | 8.076483 | 1.39557 | 823 | 20 | 178 | 9 | 12 | 260 | 119 | 213 | 0.217 | 0.621 | 0.161 | -0.9676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 8 | 20 | 3 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 16 | 9 | 4 | 5 | 3 | 47 | 34 | 17 | 4 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 18 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 28 | 10 | 30 | 26 | 2 | 22 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 13 | 122 | 42 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0.124931 | 0 | 0 | 0.125102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134352 | 0.226451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082564 | 0 | 0.110265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129464 | 0.091459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09891 | 0.118355 | 0.066886 | 0 | 0 | 0.107379 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085811 | 0 | 0 | 0.25431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141638 | 0 | 0.070358 | 0.104355 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180852 | 0.187636 | 0 | 0.452184 | 0.226592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121138 | 0.085456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094927 | 0.098739 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13634 | 0.086751 | 0 | 0.27245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074651 | 0 | 0.12135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11057 | 0 | 0 | 0.151022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186404 | 0 | 0 | 0.090943 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 1426farr | 2019/10/05 | Thoughts i had two weeks after a suicide attempt So hopefully i can write this in a way to help people that are in the same boat. I wont state my name because i dont want people to contact me or mainly my family. Otherwise this post is about depression an suicide.
Ive tried to kill myself 3 times once by hanging when ... | 2.825274 | 3.934382 | 3.937415 | 90.592914 | 74.152838 | 6.645966 | 22.655672 | 6.905105 | 0.486696 | 5,130 | 128 | 1,139 | 45 | 103 | 1,668 | 440 | 1,374 | 0.201 | 0.67 | 0.129 | -0.9992 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 72 | 8 | 55 | 10 | 19 | 61 | 88 | 15 | 8 | 101 | 1 | 128 | 53 | 9 | 17 | 11 | 207 | 212 | 78 | 12 | 25 | 56 | 0 | 17 | 7 | 1 | 19 | 31 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 87 | 37 | 8 | 5 | 41 | 14 | 1 | 15 | 35 | 54 | 2 | 8 | 23 | 25 | 142 | 34 | 162 | 161 | 34 | 151 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 6 | 114 | 61 | 7 | 38 | 71 | 778 | 229 | 10 | 0.026687 | 0 | 0.026043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.028521 | 0 | 0.08292 | 0.0589 | 0.021342 | 0.044412 | 0 | 0 | 0.018148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037321 | 0.027344 | 0.021961 | 0.023757 | 0.024949 | 0 | 0.125368 | 0.041042 | 0.066848 | 0.065073 | 0.058948 | 0.022709 | 0 | 0.028007 | 0.094411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.029792 | 0.054501 | 0 | 0.027209 | 0.05483 | 0.056463 | 0.022989 | 0 | 0.028839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120477 | 0.055027 | 0.022986 | 0 | 0.027697 | 0 | 0.030586 | 0.027316 | 0 | 0 | 0.156386 | 0.130717 | 0.092846 | 0 | 0.066881 | 0 | 0.165459 | 0 | 0 | 0.123387 | 0.07242 | 0.022485 | 0.051002 | 0 | 0.026105 | 0.050317 | 0 | 0.188914 | 0.057196 | 0 | 0.029235 | 0.024392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.020618 | 0.098688 | 0.097601 | 0 | 0.045501 | 0 | 0.021344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.023599 | 0 | 0.07172 | 0 | 0.109555 | 0 | 0 | 0.031625 | 0.089439 | 0.028197 | 0.026769 | 0.079519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.345922 | 0 | 0 | 0.047442 | 0.147627 | 0.027791 | 0.044 | 0 | 0 | 0.028258 | 0 | 0.054579 | 0.05655 | 0.091266 | 0.053495 | 0.047131 | 0.047235 | 0 | 0.029856 | 0 | 0.090754 | 0.048173 | 0 | 0.035628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.028364 | 0.058855 | 0.098941 | 0.061749 | 0 | 0.028382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170526 | 0.09042 | 0.101484 | 0.425956 | 0 | 0 | 0.0289 | 0 | 0.259022 | 0.069907 | 0 | 0.058589 | 0 | 0 | 0.025559 | 0.027151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.026828 | 0 | 0 | 0.080083 | 0.121504 | 0.034193 | 0.054878 | 0 | 0.028652 | 0.030231 | 0 | 0 | 0.042446 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054788 | 0.066228 | 0.059995 | 0 | 0 | 0.045224 | 0 | 0 | 0.029874 | 0.018889 | 0.028445 | 0.042625 | 0.044623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100327 | 0.064351 | 0.046652 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053189 | 0.085501 | 0.02622 | 0.042373 | 0.140054 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.029651 | 0.181189 | 0.029028 | 0.02607 | 0.083347 | 0.064203 | 0.046098 | 0 | 0.02202 | 0.078704 | 0.127099 | 0.021407 | 0 | 0.04799 | 0 | 0.024081 | 0.029795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.019429 | 0.027102 | 0 | 0.018958 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | skypedy | 2019/10/05 | hello everyone ı am here to listen your problems and cheer you up 7/24 ı am ready for helping other people just dm to me if you want talk | 3.523103 | 4.258824 | 5.120172 | 84.179569 | 72.103448 | 7.17931 | 24.844828 | 7.168622 | 1.077676 | 109 | 3 | 22 | 1 | 2 | 37 | 25 | 29 | 0.079 | 0.647 | 0.274 | 0.6808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.493277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.346016 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.357887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.493959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.414924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheWTFIDK | 2019/10/05 | Life or Death Hey who ever is reading this. So I've been thinking of killing myself for about 2 years now. I'm indecisive. I am, or I used to be depressed. About 4 years ago I started to feel fucking awful all the time. All my hobbies gradually became torture and everything I used to enjoy became harder and harder. It ... | 3.30809 | 4.605218 | 4.932625 | 83.191793 | 73.223827 | 7.58666 | 28.713942 | 8.115594 | 1.947054 | 1,067 | 43 | 213 | 16 | 21 | 361 | 143 | 277 | 0.209 | 0.675 | 0.116 | -0.9825 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 35 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 16 | 16 | 5 | 1 | 10 | 2 | 17 | 10 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 47 | 50 | 19 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 8 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 29 | 6 | 31 | 38 | 7 | 27 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 6 | 7 | 2 | 6 | 16 | 138 | 45 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065231 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058474 | 0 | 0.081623 | 0 | 0.100665 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10971 | 0.0978 | 0 | 0.202947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165237 | 0 | 0.099553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080131 | 0 | 0.084959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086768 | 0 | 0 | 0.086209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177358 | 0 | 0.092018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100119 | 0 | 0 | 0.212249 | 0 | 0.052717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.406519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105295 | 0 | 0.108139 | 0.091868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095949 | 0 | 0.122901 | 0.197249 | 0 | 0 | 0.108662 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073846 | 0 | 0 | 0.203684 | 0 | 0.076604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.314772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061464 | 0 | 0.152304 | 0.055933 | 0 | 0.090924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24854 | 0 | 0 | 0.113156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123542 |
suicidewatch | shoot_me_ | 2019/10/05 | I can’t anymore It’s not that I want to die is that I can’t bare to live , I have a few reasons to stay but it’s so painful to get up every morning without telling my family I’m cutting up my skin and feel like a steaming pile of shit .
My friends try , they’re trying to get me to stop SH but now I’ve just had an arg... | 1.811359 | 2.883752 | 3.645193 | 91.839893 | 76.632509 | 6.276197 | 22.050916 | 6.574016 | 0.252796 | 1,010 | 26 | 239 | 8 | 22 | 341 | 143 | 283 | 0.223 | 0.631 | 0.146 | -0.9758 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 26 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 13 | 20 | 5 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 21 | 6 | 3 | 6 | 2 | 49 | 54 | 19 | 4 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 15 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 12 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 38 | 13 | 35 | 45 | 8 | 21 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 10 | 7 | 2 | 3 | 14 | 155 | 52 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215842 | 0 | 0 | 0.08955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120184 | 0.092599 | 0 | 0 | 0.096243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225878 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.366746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205174 | 0 | 0.220093 | 0.155484 | 0.104485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084075 | 0.100603 | 0.113709 | 0 | 0.061846 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108084 | 0 | 0 | 0.23299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120394 | 0 | 0.11961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111277 | 0 | 0.265822 | 0 | 0.096091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102969 | 0.145278 | 0 | 0 | 0.237076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115891 | 0 | 0 | 0.115793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122679 | 0 | 0 | 0.117327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123862 | 0.069714 | 0.111886 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115989 | 0 | 0.090979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069728 | 0 | 0 | 0.190363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Psilocyborgg | 2019/10/05 | Pointless. I’ve completely lost my will. Last night I slept outside just hoping that a panther or an alligator would eat me, as I’ve had recurring dreams (not nightmares) of such a thing happening. Last week I sat in my car while it was running in the closed garage, and sporadically revving the engine for nearly 20 mi... | 4.623591 | 5.345029 | 5.406692 | 83.173073 | 69.584795 | 8.296503 | 27.563869 | 8.405096 | 1.727129 | 2,016 | 64 | 413 | 29 | 34 | 657 | 258 | 513 | 0.157 | 0.662 | 0.181 | 0.9421 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 44 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 8 | 19 | 29 | 6 | 0 | 25 | 0 | 43 | 21 | 9 | 8 | 4 | 72 | 71 | 36 | 4 | 9 | 12 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 17 | 22 | 2 | 8 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 19 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 26 | 7 | 66 | 17 | 60 | 37 | 6 | 71 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 38 | 33 | 0 | 5 | 25 | 272 | 83 | 4 | 0.080758 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089118 | 0 | 0.067197 | 0 | 0 | 0.109836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062098 | 0 | 0.049229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08475 | 0 | 0 | 0.179408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069566 | 0.084673 | 0 | 0.090577 | 0.064479 | 0 | 0 | 0.052082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05334 | 0.07305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078997 | 0.152263 | 0 | 0.040834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068693 | 0 | 0 | 0.18718 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045897 | 0.135472 | 0.064589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071414 | 0 | 0.072343 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095699 | 0.108261 | 0 | 0 | 0.160422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08014 | 0.215344 | 0.178693 | 0 | 0.044382 | 0.197485 | 0 | 0.085511 | 0.175487 | 0 | 0.285209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142936 | 0 | 0 | 0.088157 | 0 | 0.072887 | 0 | 0.107813 | 0 | 0.081132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059366 | 0 | 0.124571 | 0 | 0 | 0.075786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054724 | 0.3071 | 0.257796 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084375 | 0 | 0.076342 | 0 | 0.077344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09192 | 0.051736 | 0 | 0 | 0.086704 | 0 | 0.068967 | 0 | 0.064222 | 0 | 0 | 0.128707 | 0 | 0.084248 | 0 | 0 | 0.066804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086077 | 0.128987 | 0.067517 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088336 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109659 | 0 | 0 | 0.084072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066634 | 0.047633 | 0.128204 | 0.064779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072871 | 0 | 0.092868 | 0 | 0 | 0.117585 | 0 | 0.082299 | 0.172104 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Tinyghoul08 | 2019/10/05 | I want to take ten 25mg tablets of hydroxyzine What do you think would happen? | 1.115625 | 3.652699 | 1.5425 | 98.2525 | 87.125 | 5.7 | 20.5 | 7.168622 | 0.431975 | 63 | 2 | 14 | 1 | 2 | 19 | 16 | 16 | 0 | 0.909 | 0.091 | 0.0772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.547325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.465364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.39659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.365066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.439676 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | worriedaboutquitting | 2019/10/05 | There's no point. I fail to see any reason to continue my pathetic life outside of not wanting to make my parents sad or briefed. Is that a reason to continue a life of suffering ? | 3.148333 | 4.926335 | 5.151111 | 79.505 | 74.555556 | 9.244444 | 34.222222 | 9.725611 | 3.711122 | 142 | 8 | 27 | 4 | 3 | 49 | 27 | 36 | 0.366 | 0.634 | 0 | -0.9393 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 17 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.441421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.346967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.642554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | michigangirl77 | 2019/10/05 | There’s so much we can’t control in life but yet tonight, I can choose to live or kill myself I’m 25. Female. I failed out of my dental hygiene program my family still thinks I’m in. ( I also don’t want to clean teeth for the rest of my life so it’s fine)
I’ve never had a serious boyfriend, only stupid flings. I want ... | 1.144232 | 3.135424 | 3.344895 | 89.12993 | 81.434211 | 6.421754 | 20.001754 | 7.554174 | 0.641859 | 565 | 15 | 121 | 9 | 15 | 193 | 97 | 152 | 0.264 | 0.627 | 0.109 | -0.9894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 16 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 22 | 19 | 13 | 5 | 4 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 23 | 1 | 17 | 16 | 5 | 16 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 81 | 25 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.276002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.305773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160581 | 0.143413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.358851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229102 | 0 | 0 | 0.286412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137878 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18994 | 0 | 0 | 0.119219 | 0 | 0.125081 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109896 | 0.246687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129515 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186399 | 0 | 0 | 0.180185 | 0 | 0 | 0.158424 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28697 | 0 | 0.130089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Lord_of_Virgins | 2019/10/05 | I feels like no matter what I try to do it backfires No matter what I try to do It always backfires , like if I try to socialise i get laughed at or if I try to do something nice i fail.
Why even wake up if it’s the same bullshit everyday | 1.546698 | 2.379261 | 3.603915 | 92.823986 | 76.924528 | 6.054717 | 26.457547 | 5.985473 | 0.703796 | 184 | 7 | 44 | 1 | 4 | 63 | 30 | 53 | 0.196 | 0.586 | 0.218 | -0.1779 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 6 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 30 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146547 | 0.207056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283194 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223126 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.787106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | hamiifan | 2019/10/05 | Things have never gotten better Hey y’all. It’s been a while since I posted here. I just wanted to get some thoughts down since I don’t have anyone in my life who wants to be around me anymore. I’ve always had a traumatic life and everyone I’ve ever tried to vent to from childhood until now (age 20) has told me to just... | 1.663241 | 3.626606 | 3.124902 | 91.508665 | 79.551181 | 5.178215 | 17.669948 | 5.985473 | -0.304049 | 480 | 9 | 100 | 3 | 12 | 157 | 84 | 127 | 0.21 | 0.768 | 0.022 | -0.9732 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 14 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 19 | 26 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 11 | 4 | 14 | 17 | 3 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 67 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273798 | 0.096521 | 0 | 0 | 0.122885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.366257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124866 | 0.116305 | 0.131904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.48751 | 0 | 0 | 0.121892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202951 | 0 | 0.212931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091708 | 0 | 0 | 0.109589 | 0 | 0.158657 | 0 | 0.131904 | 0 | 0.09372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088894 |
suicidewatch | froost1999 | 2019/10/05 | Hey you, yes you! Don't you ever leave me, don't you ever go. | -3.55 | -2.106222 | 0.708333 | 103.3425 | 99 | 3 | 7.5 | 3.1291 | -2.455 | 45 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 17 | 9 | 15 | 0 | 0.727 | 0.273 | 0.4836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.832972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261673 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.48753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | kelzeysback | 2019/10/05 | I don't want to live anymore if it means I have to do stuff I have ADD and depression, which together make my life a living hell. I've lost all motivation-- just writing this post is really hard for me. All I want to do is sleep but everyone around me makes me do stuff. I have a huge workload in school and I'd rather o... | 3.877115 | 4.64018 | 4.737682 | 87.144471 | 71.307692 | 8.243162 | 28.300214 | 8.472885 | 1.790642 | 447 | 16 | 97 | 7 | 8 | 145 | 78 | 117 | 0.153 | 0.735 | 0.111 | -0.0458 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 13 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 25 | 21 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 18 | 2 | 13 | 17 | 4 | 10 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 68 | 24 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134594 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144471 | 0 | 0 | 0.142531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116811 | 0 | 0.078992 | 0 | 0 | 0.126813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106792 | 0 | 0 | 0.267012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.33009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201845 | 0 | 0 | 0.164693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165964 | 0 | 0 | 0.144801 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151302 | 0 | 0 | 0.116396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126404 | 0 | 0 | 0.346159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.364569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178355 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Moccamasterrrrr | 2019/10/05 | I am so tired (I suck at putting my thoughts into writing so sorry about the formatting and the awkward pacing and all that)
I don't know how else to put it. I'm tired of failing at everything I try.
I'm tired of watching my friends rush through life from accomplishment to accomplishment while I'm stuck in the mud.
I... | 2.654707 | 3.836424 | 3.940491 | 90.12051 | 74.681063 | 6.962357 | 24.050412 | 7.423996 | 0.822275 | 1,121 | 33 | 253 | 13 | 23 | 368 | 159 | 301 | 0.188 | 0.668 | 0.144 | -0.8219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 19 | 23 | 5 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 22 | 16 | 6 | 4 | 6 | 41 | 42 | 23 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 12 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 29 | 10 | 44 | 34 | 13 | 36 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 17 | 3 | 4 | 15 | 160 | 38 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066544 | 0 | 0.164136 | 0.069163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065328 | 0 | 0.069264 | 0.080803 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210848 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060419 | 0 | 0.081715 | 0 | 0 | 0.065592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083247 | 0 | 0.077208 | 0.080258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085955 | 0.063745 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055236 | 0.076411 | 0 | 0 | 0.069206 | 0 | 0 | 0.085367 | 0 | 0 | 0.073997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091589 | 0.06242 | 0 | 0.114975 | 0.057986 | 0.060314 | 0.151056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.314458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050098 | 0.080405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160546 | 0 | 0 | 0.078258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087541 | 0 | 0 | 0.062452 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153666 | 0.062084 | 0 | 0.719053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159282 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055552 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ZrOneDeep | 2019/10/05 | Anyone neat san antonio who can give me some substances to get this done? I'm ready to go but my physical will to live is apparently still going strong. Self strangling with belt did not work out my body just won't let me do it but my body can fuck right off as far as I'm concerned. So yea if you're in or near San anto... | 1.634884 | 3.530517 | 3.009477 | 92.633052 | 79.348837 | 6.625581 | 21.215116 | 7.645422 | 0.552981 | 323 | 9 | 75 | 5 | 8 | 105 | 69 | 86 | 0.048 | 0.749 | 0.203 | 0.936 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 20 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 12 | 13 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 46 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.530195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220637 | 0.12469 | 0.228944 | 0.271272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203814 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190594 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173747 | 0 | 0 | 0.169537 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Slummed | 2019/10/05 | I am not really sure what to say here. But i feel this is the place to say it. I assume this sub is mostly teenagers, not saying this insultingly, but just my assumption. I used to be that suicidal kid too. And places like this wouldve been a perfect place to vent then (im only 21 now)
I regret almost everything that... | 0.330272 | 2.452188 | 2.413645 | 93.834806 | 85.618076 | 5.243179 | 18.938852 | 6.596605 | 0.011664 | 1,256 | 34 | 283 | 14 | 38 | 421 | 201 | 343 | 0.198 | 0.684 | 0.117 | -0.9897 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 55 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 14 | 17 | 2 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 29 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 46 | 52 | 22 | 2 | 5 | 11 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 20 | 11 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 12 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 12 | 5 | 42 | 9 | 31 | 33 | 8 | 42 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 15 | 1 | 5 | 24 | 186 | 62 | 10 | 0 | 0.235798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088207 | 0 | 0.099641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076514 | 0.083084 | 0.060658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085716 | 0.104331 | 0.107531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110976 | 0 | 0.090009 | 0 | 0 | 0.08943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100627 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25994 | 0.095456 | 0.056552 | 0 | 0.079585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097994 | 0.344452 | 0 | 0 | 0.214968 | 0.103859 | 0.098745 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054686 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070284 | 0.048614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094156 | 0.132843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095479 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202285 | 0.075679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237395 | 0 | 0.100706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102142 | 0.082313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076605 | 0 | 0 | 0.070431 | 0 | 0 | 0.083192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108844 | 0 | 0.093784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066108 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058023 | 0 | 0 | 0.190166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085942 | 0 | 0 | 0.058692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089468 | 0.092244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144884 | 0 | 0.101406 | 0.141373 | 0.108795 | 0 | 0.128158 |
suicidewatch | Gmicgjjiggethnvdfhbf | 2019/10/05 | I'm so tired I just want to be important to somebody. | -1.945 | -0.152539 | 1.5 | 94.995 | 104 | 5.733333 | 22.666667 | 7.168622 | 1.177367 | 42 | 2 | 10 | 1 | 2 | 15 | 10 | 12 | 0.236 | 0.516 | 0.248 | -0.2094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.889687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.45657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | letmediepleasethanks | 2019/10/05 | I'm sad and tired and I want it to stop I'm 24. Had depression and anxiety since I was 12. Half my life wasted.
Struggling through my grad program. I'm not doing enough work to keep afloat. Everybody knows more than me.
Engaged to a man who loves me more than anything in the world. He has stood by me through hundred... | 0.071332 | 2.000315 | 1.881966 | 98.468631 | 85.041131 | 4.617744 | 18.742304 | 5.652569 | -0.481235 | 1,384 | 36 | 332 | 8 | 41 | 454 | 184 | 389 | 0.153 | 0.685 | 0.162 | 0.4075 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 48 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 18 | 23 | 6 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 21 | 16 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 53 | 63 | 27 | 2 | 9 | 7 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 13 | 23 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 13 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 12 | 53 | 9 | 51 | 52 | 5 | 42 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 4 | 31 | 17 | 2 | 0 | 20 | 196 | 66 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098866 | 0.072128 | 0 | 0.18701 | 0 | 0 | 0.155177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088584 | 0.072499 | 0 | 0.057475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166774 | 0 | 0.104729 | 0 | 0 | 0.096275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075279 | 0 | 0.103567 | 0.060806 | 0 | 0.081207 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190693 | 0.067357 | 0 | 0 | 0.086175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072844 | 0.17433 | 0.19704 | 0 | 0.107168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167609 | 0.208624 | 0 | 0.051816 | 0 | 0 | 0.199668 | 0 | 0.096413 | 0.199788 | 0.046063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072718 | 0 | 0 | 0.08848 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077993 | 0 | 0.188706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133471 | 0 | 0.225888 | 0.078826 | 0 | 0.098567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074852 | 0.054978 | 0.108367 | 0 | 0.27028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.389281 | 0.074839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108423 | 0 | 0 | 0.06864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060716 |
suicidewatch | bubble_4 | 2019/10/05 | i dont know i guess i just wanted this out of my system. this is the first time ive ever thought of this with how tough everything is going sometimes i think it would be easier if i didnt exist. no one would be hurt, not me not the people i love and this pain would go away.
im so so broken right now. and it hurts so ... | -0.801884 | 1.012684 | 1.708476 | 99.066276 | 87.767123 | 4.74589 | 13.234589 | 5.985473 | -1.108204 | 249 | 3 | 63 | 2 | 8 | 85 | 51 | 73 | 0.242 | 0.699 | 0.06 | -0.9362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 18 | 18 | 7 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 5 | 11 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 47 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182491 | 0 | 0 | 0.181317 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.431948 | 0 | 0.217921 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136709 | 0 | 0.214673 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139866 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129271 | 0 | 0.160164 | 0.11764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.429945 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | megamind233 | 2019/10/05 | Carbon monoxide Just curious here but I spent a total of 10 hours with a tarp over the exhaust of my car while I slept to try to end it but I still woke up fine? Curious as how that happens I figured that long was way more then enough to do the job | 0.891111 | 2.583542 | 2.607185 | 95.606333 | 80.851852 | 5.801481 | 21.911111 | 6.742158 | 0.302982 | 194 | 6 | 46 | 2 | 5 | 64 | 43 | 54 | 0.052 | 0.821 | 0.127 | 0.4588 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 9 | 2 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 34 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.332384 | 0.387762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.331857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.369573 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.372405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.332109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299697 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297878 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | InnocentIchigo | 2019/10/05 | Fuck it all I wish I would have just offed myself when I was younger when I had the damn chance
Everything was fucking perfect for it to cause the least amount of damage
But if I do it now then I'm just going to ruin my mother with the debt of a funeral and throwing my college loans onto her when she barely has money... | 11.269821 | 6.486916 | 10.360952 | 70.650714 | 60.011905 | 12.628571 | 41.095238 | 8.841846 | 3.704695 | 667 | 22 | 128 | 6 | 6 | 214 | 106 | 168 | 0.249 | 0.589 | 0.162 | -0.9697 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 17 | 7 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 14 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 31 | 28 | 17 | 3 | 7 | 14 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 5 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 14 | 5 | 20 | 19 | 6 | 18 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 8 | 5 | 6 | 8 | 97 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167025 | 0 | 0 | 0.138593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189447 | 0 | 0.17402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.622797 | 0.175982 | 0 | 0.095716 | 0 | 0 | 0.185681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.334553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237917 | 0 | 0 | 0.148716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119639 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | failuresoul | 2019/10/05 | I’m not good enough and I never will be. I hope I’m posting to the right subreddit, not sure exactly where to put this.
I will never be good enough for anyone. I’m a failure. I’ll never do anything worth while in my life. I’m constantly getting yelled at and pushed around and no one understands what it does to me. My... | 1.007113 | 3.019452 | 3.017401 | 91.181041 | 82.043478 | 5.725797 | 21.003456 | 6.88969 | 0.406644 | 1,108 | 33 | 243 | 13 | 30 | 373 | 155 | 299 | 0.232 | 0.683 | 0.085 | -0.9944 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 37 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 18 | 3 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 22 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 9 | 54 | 56 | 18 | 2 | 8 | 10 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 9 | 15 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 6 | 18 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 4 | 29 | 12 | 30 | 44 | 9 | 41 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 10 | 16 | 2 | 2 | 17 | 148 | 38 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186338 | 0 | 0 | 0.074852 | 0 | 0 | 0.061174 | 0.094329 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062901 | 0 | 0.074028 | 0.080082 | 0 | 0 | 0.084518 | 0 | 0.075111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077491 | 0 | 0.097212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078723 | 0 | 0 | 0.088124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159352 | 0.371802 | 0 | 0 | 0.081372 | 0 | 0 | 0.161697 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069501 | 0.083165 | 0.093999 | 0 | 0.051125 | 0.150905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079959 | 0.099525 | 0 | 0.049438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097739 | 0 | 0.12708 | 0.043949 | 0.090161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180143 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277524 | 0.086882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095802 | 0.182873 | 0.068417 | 0 | 0 | 0.099888 | 0 | 0.085875 | 0.311827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086155 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14337 | 0.081894 | 0.093846 | 0 | 0.09234 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078627 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122151 | 0 | 0 | 0.093649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265297 | 0.071404 | 0.072159 | 0 | 0.080883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063903 | 0 | 0 | 0.05793 |
suicidewatch | Glass_Egg | 2019/10/05 | I can’t sustain happiness and I feel the most comfortable nestled deep in my depression. I don’t want help anymore. I try. I try to find things that make me happy or are productive. I was diagnosed with depression when I was sixteen but I’ve felt this emptiness all of my life. Every up comes with a fast, hard down. I s... | 0.13275 | 2.413846 | 2.229539 | 93.454004 | 88.955752 | 5.175474 | 19.575853 | 6.709753 | 0.260649 | 841 | 26 | 183 | 11 | 28 | 281 | 121 | 226 | 0.237 | 0.614 | 0.15 | -0.9791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 18 | 5 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 19 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 34 | 46 | 12 | 2 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 27 | 10 | 25 | 36 | 7 | 22 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 8 | 2 | 2 | 12 | 112 | 34 | 0 | 0.105224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104354 | 0.073575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089538 | 0 | 0 | 0.093062 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090641 | 0 | 0.113709 | 0 | 0 | 0.116428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181258 | 0.1068 | 0.218411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217448 | 0 | 0.069499 | 0 | 0.177311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106408 | 0 | 0.101031 | 0 | 0.096172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081295 | 0.097278 | 0.10995 | 0 | 0 | 0.176513 | 0 | 0.232019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224025 | 0.09426 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118595 | 0.12469 | 0.070529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222968 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070238 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083988 | 0 | 0 | 0.078022 | 0.243465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145898 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108011 | 0 | 0 | 0.1053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074478 | 0 | 0 | 0.087972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084575 | 0.18394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061357 | 0.120939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.372382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094609 | 0 | 0.094948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
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