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suicidewatch | didyouknowjeff | 2019/01/16 | Second semester and I feel like I’m in a time loop I got pretty used to being alone at the end of my first semester of college. I had “friends” but they were mostly people in my clubs or who I’d say hi to passing by. I knew a lot of people, but there wasn’t really anybody I’d hang out with. I’d go to class, my room, lu... | 2.402455 | 3.603322 | 3.986031 | 89.469508 | 75.346863 | 7.228325 | 23.236865 | 7.793538 | 0.919503 | 1,000 | 28 | 224 | 14 | 21 | 334 | 133 | 271 | 0.138 | 0.734 | 0.128 | -0.7747 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 32 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 14 | 16 | 4 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 20 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 40 | 42 | 15 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 10 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 6 | 28 | 9 | 32 | 28 | 10 | 36 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 17 | 16 | 3 | 8 | 21 | 142 | 38 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115591 | 0.119556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088762 | 0.096383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096431 | 0 | 0.204482 | 0 | 0.128741 | 0.228731 | 0 | 0 | 0.110303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23347 | 0.2474 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196378 | 0.139584 | 0 | 0.356739 | 0 | 0.06031 | 0.110736 | 0.065604 | 0 | 0.184648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19032 | 0.094095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.320112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091799 | 0 | 0.116826 | 0.091987 | 0.105088 | 0 | 0 | 0.118492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201933 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091627 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082002 | 0 | 0 | 0.074336 |
suicidewatch | thrww11 | 2019/01/16 | it wasn't your fault hey there.
hey.
can you hear me?
there you are.
i'm really happy that we get to have these talks
i feel like i don't have anyone else to talk to.
just me and my cat.
and my goldfish.
but my goldfish isn't really feeling that well right now.
it's all that lady's fault.
anyway i was thinking today, ... | -1.245483 | 0.76921 | 0.540732 | 102.420497 | 100.402439 | 3.254784 | 13.624765 | 5.069623 | -1.328768 | 593 | 12 | 141 | 3 | 26 | 190 | 83 | 164 | 0.05 | 0.767 | 0.184 | 0.9676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 39 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 16 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 28 | 31 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 22 | 6 | 9 | 24 | 6 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 9 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 88 | 38 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097573 | 0.14298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141116 | 0.099691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153724 | 0 | 0 | 0.148548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15338 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068174 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117182 | 0 | 0 | 0.118636 | 0 | 0 | 0.093147 | 0 | 0 | 0.152005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178792 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.595851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.414039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092707 | 0.178829 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | PAYPAL_ME_10_DOLLARS | 2019/01/16 | I felt like I was relapsing back into depression again today Just wanted to get this out there. Felt like I was just falling back into depression again today. Felt pretty upset at a classmate giving away my homework and they gave it to someone else and lost it. Ended up finding it though but the day is too late to turn... | 3.882009 | 6.137121 | 4.222493 | 84.867375 | 73.83871 | 7.089736 | 28.208211 | 8.000946 | 1.949477 | 518 | 21 | 95 | 8 | 11 | 162 | 81 | 124 | 0.171 | 0.71 | 0.119 | -0.8102 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 10 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 22 | 29 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 9 | 5 | 21 | 15 | 3 | 23 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 72 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127585 | 0.208837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087577 | 0 | 0.233922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11344 | 0 | 0.360825 | 0 | 0.151448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.391156 | 0 | 0.124115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141896 | 0.130268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.360252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07463 | 0 | 0.153184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132686 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115059 | 0.104542 | 0 | 0 | 0.096117 | 0 | 0.108447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133419 | 0.215614 | 0 | 0 | 0.257437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147707 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ellebellewhite | 2019/01/16 | I'm so numb, maybe I'm just a phsycopath I'm 18, a girl, I have people who care about me, I'm not ugly, I have a good life. But I don't care, I want to die. I'm past the point of feeling emotions anymore. I got accepted into 8 colleges and I couldnt care less. I'm now failing all my classes because I just don't care. I... | 0.020422 | 1.895576 | 2.415698 | 94.886404 | 84.844156 | 5.408442 | 20.663961 | 6.627428 | 0.15956 | 544 | 17 | 130 | 6 | 16 | 186 | 88 | 154 | 0.196 | 0.617 | 0.187 | -0.3582 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 16 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 24 | 31 | 8 | 2 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 19 | 10 | 15 | 26 | 3 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 69 | 20 | 3 | 0.126173 | 0 | 0.123127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12513 | 0.088223 | 0 | 0.207659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.643209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083336 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.382781 | 0.180276 | 0.121146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06592 | 0 | 0 | 0.105828 | 0.100912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08912 | 0.123284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120446 | 0.087472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119274 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123253 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081251 |
suicidewatch | ZenithOfDepression | 2019/01/16 | Just lost the last thing keeping me here It might sound really, really pathetic, but I just "lost" my only friend. We played video games together, never met in real life. I have no true friends in my real life, no prospects or talents, an abusive family, no SO, pretty much everything that makes someone have a shred of ... | 6.103261 | 6.088611 | 6.813829 | 76.934946 | 66.246377 | 10.185024 | 30.77657 | 9.928628 | 2.809393 | 831 | 28 | 161 | 17 | 12 | 275 | 130 | 207 | 0.217 | 0.607 | 0.176 | -0.862 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 29 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 13 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 37 | 25 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 12 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 4 | 27 | 8 | 18 | 12 | 3 | 27 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 23 | 15 | 0 | 3 | 12 | 103 | 32 | 1 | 0 | 0.138011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12064 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120356 | 0 | 0.076935 | 0.105364 | 0.098141 | 0 | 0.209372 | 0 | 0.109808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.26998 | 0 | 0.060857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093161 | 0 | 0 | 0.23067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131283 | 0 | 0 | 0.123069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121576 | 0 | 0.103534 | 0.128869 | 0 | 0.12803 | 0.094948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11911 | 0.246823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.381459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077752 | 0.118094 | 0 | 0.126882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085627 | 0 | 0.089838 | 0 | 0 | 0.21862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157862 | 0.177179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265163 | 0.149242 | 0.119762 | 0 | 0.125057 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118738 | 0.098694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077385 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | NSFWPONGPONG | 2019/01/16 | Should I Just Off Myself If I'm.... Lazy, procrastinate, going to school when I don't know what I want to do in life. Can't concentrate on learning anything I.e. I want to learn editing, but seeing all the tools freak me out. Even when I study my arse off, I get Bs while the smarter students manage to get perfect A's. ... | 3.954592 | 5.164228 | 5.075101 | 83.129143 | 71.530864 | 8.256958 | 26.321406 | 8.694712 | 1.840087 | 3,185 | 102 | 632 | 56 | 59 | 1,051 | 340 | 810 | 0.134 | 0.721 | 0.145 | 0.938 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 97 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 50 | 46 | 6 | 8 | 29 | 1 | 60 | 11 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 120 | 122 | 53 | 2 | 18 | 28 | 6 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 7 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 34 | 37 | 0 | 3 | 26 | 4 | 17 | 9 | 20 | 20 | 1 | 7 | 12 | 8 | 92 | 27 | 102 | 93 | 15 | 80 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 47 | 44 | 2 | 15 | 26 | 430 | 126 | 29 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038188 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.032474 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.03339 | 0.048929 | 0.117891 | 0.042511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.036719 | 0 | 0.11644 | 0 | 0.081269 | 0 | 0 | 0.042234 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048762 | 0.054617 | 0.048688 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050069 | 0 | 0 | 0.076255 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08226 | 0.048469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19946 | 0 | 0.042295 | 0 | 0 | 0.157704 | 0 | 0.040234 | 0.045631 | 0.128753 | 0 | 0.495195 | 0.161208 | 0.048291 | 0.06823 | 0 | 0 | 0.043646 | 0.040619 | 0 | 0.052359 | 0.036894 | 0 | 0.124746 | 0.229048 | 0.027139 | 0.080107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047283 | 0.042228 | 0 | 0 | 0.047147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064016 | 0.050454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055101 | 0 | 0.161724 | 0 | 0 | 0.094776 | 0.084891 | 0.052832 | 0 | 0.104976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202378 | 0.09332 | 0 | 0.210836 | 0.084521 | 0.120303 | 0 | 0 | 0.040598 | 0.043099 | 0 | 0.031876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167785 | 0 | 0 | 0.035104 | 0.035409 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050856 | 0.032359 | 0.145275 | 0 | 0 | 0.053025 | 0 | 0 | 0.099319 | 0.041697 | 0.049892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137204 | 0 | 0.051486 | 0 | 0 | 0.048005 | 0.10699 | 0 | 0.047766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054095 | 0 | 0 | 0.037976 | 0.143429 | 0.144987 | 0.038053 | 0.086946 | 0 | 0 | 0.049018 | 0.118507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040461 | 0.036763 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054701 | 0 | 0 | 0.052235 | 0.05419 | 0 | 0 | 0.035905 | 0.076765 | 0 | 0.08793 | 0 | 0 | 0.158627 | 0.030599 | 0 | 0.037911 | 0.027845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052594 | 0.039402 | 0.084499 | 0.037905 | 0 | 0 | 0.042936 | 0 | 0.08618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06953 | 0.048496 | 0 | 0.067845 | 0 | 0 | 0.123007 |
suicidewatch | PhatPenguin8 | 2019/01/16 | Think I'm finally going to do it These past few months have been the hardest in my life yet. I was a depressed NEET a bit back at the start of this. I had a sudden burst of motivation and I clung to it. I went and got a job after rotting in my room for 2 1/2 years after finishing school. At first I felt better about my... | 1.615385 | 2.578113 | 3.229858 | 95.060513 | 76.948718 | 6.111681 | 20.407407 | 6.238725 | -0.122454 | 1,233 | 26 | 303 | 8 | 27 | 409 | 183 | 351 | 0.153 | 0.714 | 0.133 | -0.9227 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 25 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 19 | 19 | 1 | 3 | 21 | 2 | 36 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 39 | 66 | 20 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 19 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 14 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 22 | 7 | 42 | 11 | 38 | 35 | 7 | 48 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 16 | 19 | 1 | 4 | 22 | 197 | 61 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085952 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101674 | 0 | 0 | 0.096161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149117 | 0 | 0.059108 | 0 | 0.082508 | 0 | 0.101756 | 0.171511 | 0.211716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213018 | 0.062533 | 0 | 0.083514 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112446 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128086 | 0.087708 | 0.16339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049027 | 0 | 0.093099 | 0.106218 | 0 | 0.082476 | 0 | 0 | 0.074913 | 0 | 0.050659 | 0.093015 | 0.055106 | 0.081328 | 0.23265 | 0 | 0.106815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.288661 | 0.17237 | 0 | 0.100972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10535 | 0.099151 | 0.136975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085809 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097905 | 0 | 0.154789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065704 | 0.073744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092562 | 0 | 0 | 0.101305 | 0 | 0.091661 | 0 | 0.092863 | 0 | 0 | 0.09278 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154217 | 0.097076 | 0.098131 | 0.077267 | 0.088271 | 0.101153 | 0 | 0.099531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193253 | 0.124259 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107729 | 0.131662 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083745 | 0 | 0 | 0.057191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179771 | 0.087494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098813 | 0.068879 | 0 | 0 | 0.062441 |
suicidewatch | throwaway387101 | 2019/01/16 | Going to run in front of a car tomorrow. Hope it will at least hit and hurt me I did this 3 times today in a 40mph road and every time the cars screeched to a halt in front of me rather than actually hitting me. I guess my timing was wrong and I didn’t run into the street fast enough. Also an element of me being too pu... | 0.223743 | 1.782001 | 2.512571 | 96.132 | 82.4 | 5.619048 | 17.380952 | 6.543119 | -0.386105 | 519 | 10 | 129 | 5 | 14 | 177 | 88 | 150 | 0.148 | 0.777 | 0.075 | -0.9029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 19 | 11 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 16 | 4 | 22 | 12 | 3 | 34 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 84 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129947 | 0 | 0.163206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122741 | 0 | 0 | 0.303635 | 0 | 0.097046 | 0 | 0.123795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076765 | 0 | 0.167007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.291869 | 0 | 0 | 0.314582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108946 | 0 | 0 | 0.156261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140718 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.501908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.342703 | 0 | 0.139272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160644 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | DontForgetToThink | 2019/01/16 | How I feel in a way I know how to express (I think) If I stand up to leave and pull my teeth apart
My feet won’t move, no sound will escape my heart
I ain’t got the bravery to come clean
I’ll remain seated and fall asleep dreaming of domestic screams
I’ll stay, anemic, lack of iron, lack of sleeping
Stuck in my way, la... | 6.116737 | 5.171084 | 5.98 | 86.03 | 66.473684 | 8.863158 | 31.631579 | 7.554174 | 1.831905 | 364 | 12 | 79 | 3 | 5 | 114 | 68 | 95 | 0.226 | 0.699 | 0.075 | -0.9066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 14 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 14 | 8 | 5 | 18 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 43 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129407 | 0 | 0 | 0.249326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.428721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235637 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150878 | 0 | 0 | 0.137303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159867 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.373806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | paradoxalis | 2019/01/16 | Contemplating suicide. I don't have a reason to live anymore. 16 years of being here and all I've done is fail. There's no one I can turn to. I'm alone, stuck in a bubble. I want to die. I just want to die. I'm done with everything. | -2.147885 | -0.338585 | 1.014231 | 99.368269 | 101.115385 | 4.138462 | 14.192308 | 5.985473 | -0.876085 | 177 | 4 | 45 | 2 | 8 | 62 | 38 | 52 | 0.389 | 0.565 | 0.046 | -0.9657 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 13 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 27 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234778 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.491388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.484525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243403 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15245 |
suicidewatch | ClogsInBronteland | 2019/01/16 | Life long death wish I am 38 and chronically suicidal. I am not planning anymore. But death couldn’t come quick enough. My life won’t change anymore and will probably only get worse.
Years long therapy hasn’t worked. Antidepressants don’t work anymore. Self harm isn’t sufficient anymore. I take morphine to numb myself... | 2.359672 | 5.233217 | 3.100951 | 86.755359 | 85.162791 | 5.91797 | 22.934461 | 7.348243 | 1.233247 | 363 | 13 | 66 | 6 | 11 | 114 | 58 | 86 | 0.254 | 0.633 | 0.113 | -0.9419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 15 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 35 | 13 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.591982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157865 | 0.128548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154194 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21081 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103457 | 0 | 0 | 0.163809 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112202 | 0 | 0.130433 | 0 | 0.170657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171607 | 0 | 0 | 0.325922 | 0 | 0.152078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096099 |
suicidewatch | EffectiveGovernment | 2019/01/16 | UPDATE I didn't jump.
Best goddamn decision of my entire life. | 1.195 | 3.767362 | 3.466667 | 80.895 | 97.333333 | 5.733333 | 22.666667 | 7.168622 | 1.722367 | 50 | 2 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 17 | 12 | 12 | 0.242 | 0.575 | 0.183 | -0.2057 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.829596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.558364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | SauceBeUponHim | 2019/01/16 | Why do I even deserve to live? I was such a dick before. I used to have (and even still do) thoughts about killing people. I even made a post on r/foreveralone that said sometimes I have thoughts about killing people. Now I'm banned from that subreddit, and honestly I deserve it. How does someone like me, that has no e... | 3.695714 | 5.365066 | 3.660584 | 91.209091 | 72.863636 | 6.846753 | 29.616883 | 7.44753 | 1.567511 | 352 | 15 | 74 | 4 | 7 | 107 | 57 | 88 | 0.223 | 0.72 | 0.057 | -0.9504 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 12 | 15 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 12 | 9 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 50 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140279 | 0 | 0 | 0.142962 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.443868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.37175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08208 | 0 | 0.296706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158972 | 0.112146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.349425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142352 | 0 | 0.166163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.400136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | lususchrist | 2019/01/16 | I am going to kill myself I have nothing to live for. I have no friends at all, my family is small and our relationship is poor, I'm working at a place I hate with people who make me cry every night, I'm living in a town that I am so desperate to leave but cannot leave as I cannot afford it, the people I see for my men... | 3.827956 | 3.601496 | 6.334926 | 79.159828 | 71.068966 | 9.042365 | 25.192118 | 8.841846 | 1.58807 | 418 | 10 | 92 | 7 | 7 | 152 | 77 | 116 | 0.306 | 0.648 | 0.046 | -0.9846 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 24 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 16 | 2 | 16 | 23 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 67 | 20 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121133 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161127 | 0.150081 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167924 | 0 | 0.090067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137621 | 0 | 0.093065 | 0 | 0.202469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175865 | 0 | 0.189342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.377224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.314581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118902 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167161 | 0 | 0.170919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246983 | 0.31107 | 0.186106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12968 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | joaniepoot | 2019/01/16 | I fantasize about making my life perfect and ending it all First time posting in this group. I'm just coming out of a major depressive episode and for the first time in a while, a lot of things are looking up for me. I have a lot of aspirations in life and I do want to build a great life for myself, but these desires a... | 4.473507 | 5.795245 | 5.561996 | 79.702285 | 70.410256 | 8.582805 | 29.149321 | 9.007467 | 2.436843 | 945 | 36 | 177 | 18 | 17 | 313 | 130 | 234 | 0.085 | 0.693 | 0.222 | 0.9895 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 10 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 21 | 9 | 2 | 2 | 8 | 45 | 38 | 16 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 22 | 8 | 34 | 29 | 9 | 31 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 14 | 1 | 3 | 12 | 135 | 34 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0.110896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069274 | 0.125506 | 0 | 0.128033 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097878 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.301953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095746 | 0.108588 | 0.102132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114919 | 0 | 0 | 0.124487 | 0 | 0.193324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105058 | 0.059372 | 0.109014 | 0.129168 | 0 | 0 | 0.250576 | 0 | 0 | 0.100491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11399 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120328 | 0 | 0 | 0.481602 | 0 | 0 | 0.100346 | 0 | 0.095429 | 0 | 0 | 0.193225 | 0 | 0 | 0.075855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099226 | 0 | 0 | 0.107426 | 0.128112 | 0.108835 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0728 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118551 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075497 | 0.072816 | 0 | 0 | 0.132528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134055 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082731 | 0 | 0 | 0.322905 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | cocainedanceparty | 2019/01/16 | i know why i'm so alone another person left me today because i annoyed them. i didnt even notice that. did i text them too often? did my general presence annoy them? i wouldnt be surprised.
i'm gonna do the only thing i can right now and that is self harm and cry. fuck my 6 week clean streak, i NEED this right now. i ... | -1.436746 | 0.507742 | 1.075979 | 101.088333 | 93.62963 | 3.826455 | 14.195767 | 5.288315 | -1.202023 | 370 | 7 | 93 | 2 | 14 | 125 | 73 | 108 | 0.139 | 0.766 | 0.095 | -0.5189 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 20 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 19 | 2 | 3 | 12 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 57 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183309 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156761 | 0 | 0 | 0.116901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136742 | 0.163625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.384601 | 0 | 0.125014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201505 | 0 | 0 | 0.119933 | 0.134609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154541 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.302298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.335533 | 0.169122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140487 | 0.141971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159706 | 0 | 0.407061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | aragember | 2019/01/16 | a list of little big things Over the course of the past three months, whenever I thought of a reason not to kill myself, I wrote it down. So now I have this little list I always carry with me, to look at when I feel like it's the end. There's some stuff on it that maybe only applies to me personally, but I'm sharing it... | 2.748219 | 3.866545 | 4.301304 | 87.873537 | 74.355649 | 6.817387 | 22.901209 | 7.168622 | 0.694919 | 890 | 23 | 192 | 9 | 18 | 298 | 146 | 239 | 0.053 | 0.836 | 0.112 | 0.9228 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 32 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 1 | 15 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 30 | 34 | 11 | 2 | 6 | 5 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 20 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 9 | 21 | 5 | 29 | 23 | 4 | 29 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 21 | 12 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 129 | 41 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100781 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105992 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107276 | 0 | 0 | 0.079998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122483 | 0.086528 | 0 | 0 | 0.221402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206505 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13651 | 0 | 0.081184 | 0 | 0.121492 | 0.120299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123853 | 0 | 0.059173 | 0.36418 | 0 | 0 | 0.10171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080848 | 0 | 0.365042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096676 | 0 | 0.089037 | 0.089808 | 0.186829 | 0.116978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127094 | 0.128988 | 0.082074 | 0.092117 | 0 | 0 | 0.268977 | 0 | 0.115622 | 0 | 0.211513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121152 | 0 | 0.077592 | 0.124531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080466 | 0 | 0.118999 | 0.096155 | 0.070626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258119 | 0 | 0 | 0.077997 |
suicidewatch | ciaranac | 2019/01/16 | I need some advice I feel like lately everything has just been sort of falling apart, but I’ve also been making steps towards a healthier life as well.
I have an issue with school because I never feel like I’m doing good enough to impress my family or friends, same with a lot of the other stuff I do. I just never feel... | 4.746353 | 4.525503 | 5.2 | 88.06 | 69.117647 | 8.211765 | 25.235294 | 7.554174 | 0.967812 | 638 | 14 | 143 | 6 | 10 | 204 | 97 | 170 | 0.138 | 0.637 | 0.225 | 0.9507 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 17 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 16 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 44 | 30 | 12 | 1 | 7 | 17 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 16 | 13 | 17 | 23 | 8 | 15 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 13 | 11 | 97 | 24 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105354 | 0.076917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132417 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105406 | 0 | 0 | 0.260752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113401 | 0 | 0.11895 | 0 | 0.255199 | 0.360568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097485 | 0 | 0 | 0.121042 | 0 | 0.105833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131698 | 0 | 0 | 0.139598 | 0 | 0.069344 | 0 | 0.142335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089124 | 0.308222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107272 | 0 | 0 | 0.16845 | 0 | 0.126763 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18712 | 0.194633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120844 | 0 | 0 | 0.120736 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080833 | 0 | 0 | 0.135468 | 0 | 0.107756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127699 | 0 | 0.114868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097138 | 0 | 0.141247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144444 | 0 | 0 | 0.118922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | H2oguy702 | 2019/01/16 | It ends now On way now to end this pain. I caused it all. It’s true when it’s time it’s easy. No looking back. | -4.251111 | -3.204832 | -1.246963 | 113.620667 | 113.814815 | 2.16 | 9.103704 | 3.1291 | -2.640639 | 83 | 1 | 26 | 0 | 5 | 28 | 20 | 27 | 0.197 | 0.617 | 0.185 | -0.0964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 15 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.37283 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.642898 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.386184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.288078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwawaymylife29 | 2019/01/16 | Any helpful resources? I've never spoken to anyone about my suicidal thoughts or depression or anything. If I even allude to it, people automatically assume there's no way I could be feeling that way. To everyone I'm happy and caring. I'm the shoulder they cry on; the person they turn to and tell things they'd never te... | 2.302473 | 4.075277 | 3.548804 | 90.102174 | 76.907609 | 6.33913 | 24 | 7.168622 | 0.862365 | 1,405 | 46 | 298 | 16 | 32 | 457 | 167 | 368 | 0.104 | 0.792 | 0.104 | -0.7096 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 47 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 20 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 37 | 6 | 2 | 6 | 4 | 67 | 77 | 26 | 2 | 11 | 12 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 31 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 19 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 16 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 10 | 43 | 6 | 42 | 51 | 3 | 34 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 35 | 14 | 0 | 10 | 12 | 209 | 74 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078742 | 0.166552 | 0.081353 | 0.065338 | 0 | 0.148454 | 0 | 0.074597 | 0 | 0 | 0.048401 | 0 | 0 | 0.089455 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162149 | 0 | 0.080952 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253573 | 0 | 0.087215 | 0 | 0 | 0.136771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052442 | 0 | 0 | 0.075869 | 0 | 0 | 0.07485 | 0 | 0.120439 | 0 | 0.076235 | 0.086977 | 0.072569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16593 | 0 | 0.045124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087466 | 0 | 0 | 0.084521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070573 | 0 | 0 | 0.261812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056081 | 0.07758 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066675 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084557 | 0.053802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11009 | 0.138655 | 0 | 0.087156 | 0.075057 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075526 | 0.189422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065679 | 0 | 0.079456 | 0 | 0.269096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105498 | 0.152626 | 0 | 0.063033 | 0 | 0.182514 | 0.07526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086363 | 0 | 0.082657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187325 | 0.252091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071645 | 0.088645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057803 | 0 | 0 | 0.056402 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | WheresLorenzo | 2019/01/16 | My wife is suicidal I only seem to make it worse. I make her feel ignored and stress her to the point of breakdown. Our arguments sometimes turn violent. I’m so scared I’m going to lose her. I’m not mentally well myself and I’m afraid I can’t support her through this. Especially if I keep making it worse. I want to hel... | -0.505463 | 1.658951 | 2.16481 | 90.365657 | 100.392405 | 5.468744 | 20.000974 | 7.010147 | 0.767517 | 300 | 11 | 64 | 6 | 13 | 103 | 55 | 79 | 0.244 | 0.644 | 0.113 | -0.7753 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 16 | 20 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 2 | 6 | 18 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 37 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195867 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13435 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17816 | 0 | 0 | 0.110156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22424 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.401384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200675 | 0 | 0 | 0.182472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229602 | 0 | 0 | 0.219248 | 0.227456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.408529 | 0.142386 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ZakoraHatake | 2019/01/16 | I don’t know how much more I can take I’ve been depressed since my senior year of high school when my cats passed, my family started to get weaker and I lost my best friend because I was in love with her. I’m a freshman now but I just feel so overwhelmed by everything. I can’t make friends, the friends from back home a... | 1.474376 | 3.252429 | 2.996298 | 93.098603 | 79.380228 | 5.904246 | 22.365177 | 6.816662 | 0.449515 | 973 | 30 | 219 | 10 | 24 | 319 | 136 | 263 | 0.187 | 0.605 | 0.209 | 0.8996 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 23 | 20 | 2 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 17 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 44 | 50 | 24 | 1 | 3 | 13 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 13 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 9 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 35 | 12 | 26 | 44 | 9 | 34 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 15 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 139 | 42 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101088 | 0 | 0.156107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066374 | 0 | 0 | 0.110264 | 0.193592 | 0 | 0 | 0.080319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091701 | 0.150102 | 0 | 0.059498 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.307286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084066 | 0 | 0.101297 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08772 | 0 | 0.092012 | 0 | 0.148053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.37704 | 0 | 0.101987 | 0 | 0.05547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08631 | 0.103901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206246 | 0.097904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160921 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13788 | 0.047684 | 0 | 0.172371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106546 | 0 | 0.176182 | 0.092355 | 0.195453 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103737 | 0.143499 | 0.072372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092267 | 0 | 0 | 0.099298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100352 | 0.096371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195436 | 0.09878 | 0 | 0.088854 | 0.101822 | 0 | 0 | 0.080738 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138168 | 0 | 0.077946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220157 | 0 | 0.08531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057569 | 0.154946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099121 | 0.099466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062853 |
suicidewatch | NicolaNetti | 2019/01/16 | Finding reasons to live I'm looking for reads or videos of famous intelligent philosophers, scientists, about why should we live.
If somebody can prompt me in some field of philosophy or science that specifically deals with this question, would be much appreciated.
For example is there is there any speech about, for... | 10.27278 | 9.17967 | 8.68139 | 70.479054 | 58.324324 | 11.159846 | 43.440154 | 9.957138 | 4.406978 | 664 | 33 | 111 | 10 | 7 | 201 | 103 | 148 | 0 | 0.917 | 0.083 | 0.9001 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 15 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 29 | 23 | 10 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 10 | 1 | 18 | 16 | 7 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 10 | 7 | 78 | 18 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.315982 | 0.354363 | 0.099159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.272635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163544 | 0.116422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150329 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205987 | 0.071238 | 0 | 0.257515 | 0 | 0.122448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107191 | 0 | 0 | 0.140829 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.326693 | 0 | 0.145855 | 0 | 0 | 0.149922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147573 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131576 | 0.162798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207166 | 0 | 0.354363 | 0 |
suicidewatch | DramaKlng | 2019/01/16 | Friend Thread So many people here are lonely and want just a friend. Why is there no thread for that ? Would help a lot of people. Maybe they can meet up in person if they are near to each other and have a chat. Or maybe I am just too "blue eyed" and it's a opportunity for bad-minded people, don't know but maybe it's w... | -0.076303 | 1.983193 | 1.499419 | 100.119833 | 86.887324 | 4.11338 | 10.283451 | 5.148861 | -1.837438 | 255 | 1 | 63 | 1 | 8 | 82 | 53 | 71 | 0.05 | 0.792 | 0.158 | 0.6369 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 10 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 7 | 9 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 42 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.322858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211836 | 0.629735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.434565 | 0.182441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148427 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | LocalPhoenix | 2019/01/16 | Just a Rant Sorry I don’t have anyone to let out too and this is me writing on the edge so my words maybe jumbled and I’m just done with life. Throw away account.
You try to be this new you everyday seeing what could be better seeking, wishing and trying for the opportunity to be that guy your friends will remember ... | 4.736412 | 6.200225 | 4.498706 | 87.032176 | 69.941176 | 6.969412 | 26.982353 | 7.24862 | 1.263273 | 2,796 | 91 | 543 | 26 | 50 | 852 | 277 | 680 | 0.114 | 0.759 | 0.127 | 0.7128 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 65 | 0 | 62 | 5 | 11 | 38 | 38 | 3 | 2 | 31 | 2 | 44 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 115 | 83 | 44 | 2 | 13 | 32 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 6 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 41 | 25 | 0 | 11 | 15 | 6 | 3 | 4 | 10 | 15 | 0 | 5 | 12 | 12 | 75 | 23 | 79 | 53 | 16 | 79 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 2 | 95 | 34 | 0 | 11 | 45 | 368 | 116 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060369 | 0.046543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.031036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083405 | 0.136522 | 0 | 0.135288 | 0.147064 | 0.03777 | 0 | 0 | 0.078513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045255 | 0 | 0 | 0.038235 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106317 | 0 | 0.048757 | 0.085877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037079 | 0 | 0 | 0.045863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112193 | 0.042413 | 0 | 0.086837 | 0 | 0 | 0.089773 | 0 | 0 | 0.048623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.034293 | 0 | 0.04638 | 0.04258 | 0.025226 | 0 | 0 | 0.048936 | 0 | 0.04395 | 0 | 0 | 0.039762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100054 | 0 | 0 | 0.046897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.276169 | 0 | 0 | 0.048787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045388 | 0.031352 | 0.108425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049657 | 0 | 0 | 0.040061 | 0 | 0.059257 | 0.045001 | 0.312146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044818 | 0 | 0.035429 | 0 | 0.065258 | 0.032912 | 0.034234 | 0.042869 | 0.047206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090232 | 0.033758 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123088 | 0.038757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044399 | 0 | 0.028435 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251406 | 0 | 0 | 0.035298 | 0 | 0 | 0.070741 | 0 | 0.046305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225651 | 0 | 0 | 0.049687 | 0 | 0.04731 | 0.141789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107029 | 0.387958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147442 | 0.056882 | 0 | 0.070476 | 0.232939 | 0 | 0.084146 | 0 | 0 | 0.421897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.02618 | 0 | 0.035604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040052 | 0 | 0.051042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.031531 | 0 | 0 | 0.028583 |
suicidewatch | FatOrangeTabby | 2019/01/16 | Another day, another rejection from job interviews I know I’m not entitled to a job. I probably lack some kind of technical skills to get attention from companies, or maybe I lack people skills. But after so many “thank you for applying to company xyz, but we decided to move on with the process” type emails, I just don... | 5.884805 | 6.764596 | 6.353662 | 76.939065 | 66.835498 | 10.315844 | 34.880519 | 10.355216 | 3.745464 | 962 | 45 | 176 | 24 | 15 | 312 | 144 | 231 | 0.175 | 0.736 | 0.089 | -0.9694 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 26 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 11 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 37 | 31 | 11 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 22 | 6 | 35 | 24 | 8 | 25 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 16 | 12 | 2 | 3 | 8 | 110 | 32 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087627 | 0.270235 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090099 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110999 | 0.135104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143709 | 0 | 0 | 0.108567 | 0.123128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065154 | 0.092055 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199108 | 0.119126 | 0.134644 | 0 | 0.146464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.383611 | 0 | 0 | 0.134184 | 0.070816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131765 | 0.273046 | 0.062953 | 0.129148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086013 | 0.13064 | 0.129454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14308 | 0 | 0 | 0.089333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138929 | 0.246597 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145969 | 0.110043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13041 | 0.102682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132269 | 0.106591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118634 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082979 |
suicidewatch | Callme_Dave | 2019/01/16 | Idealizing Suicide Recently I've been on a slippery slope and have lashing out at my family members for minor things. I've completely disassociated from everything and everyone. I noticed on my Facebook feed today that a 55 year old man had committed suicide and not left any kind of clues as to why he did it. Nothing r... | 2.108281 | 4.182183 | 4.146949 | 84.181106 | 78.606299 | 7.067979 | 26.331365 | 8.076483 | 1.759258 | 492 | 20 | 99 | 9 | 12 | 168 | 89 | 127 | 0.205 | 0.717 | 0.078 | -0.9674 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 23 | 21 | 9 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 11 | 4 | 16 | 11 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 59 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13954 | 0.131244 | 0 | 0.137666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152592 | 0 | 0.082993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15207 | 0.160511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158664 | 0.149328 | 0 | 0.071344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.294902 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14308 | 0.140122 | 0.166259 | 0.153236 | 0 | 0 | 0.111064 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093552 | 0 | 0.144189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112423 | 0 | 0 | 0.103362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.479206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097017 | 0 | 0 | 0.231866 | 0 | 0 | 0.138421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148819 | 0 | 0.159663 | 0 | 0.09404 |
suicidewatch | brokenmanual | 2019/01/16 | I see no way out of my depression, please someone talk to me. I am divorced at 32 after 1.5 years of a marriage I couldn’t handle. Left everything with my ex. A week after the divorce, I was let go from my job. I moved in back to my parents three months ago. I thought it would be fine, I could rest for a bit and start ... | 0.875114 | 2.588168 | 2.961217 | 92.949362 | 80.987578 | 6.032464 | 20.050104 | 7.031649 | 0.207067 | 579 | 15 | 136 | 7 | 15 | 196 | 95 | 161 | 0.1 | 0.828 | 0.072 | -0.7227 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 22 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 16 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 28 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 3 | 27 | 2 | 23 | 18 | 3 | 28 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 90 | 29 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108764 | 0 | 0 | 0.087853 | 0 | 0.117329 | 0 | 0.141379 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114774 | 0 | 0.122429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077419 | 0.114258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139805 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074865 | 0 | 0.153666 | 0 | 0.148008 | 0.139298 | 0.192438 | 0 | 0 | 0.120288 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217465 | 0.144784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15126 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136384 | 0 | 0.325658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230844 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160697 | 0.216256 | 0.218541 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09677 | 0 | 0 | 0.175447 |
suicidewatch | david1619911 | 2019/01/16 | i just wanna die i hate life. im nothing and feel like i dont have a future and it makes me sad and depressed all the time, currently work with family which is depressing as hell, have plans to become a lorry driver this year it was my goal but after researching alot ive found the pay to not even be close to what i was... | 4.209952 | 5.156489 | 5.447529 | 81.684164 | 70.676301 | 8.772447 | 27.13343 | 9.075115 | 2.106045 | 677 | 22 | 134 | 13 | 12 | 226 | 111 | 173 | 0.254 | 0.631 | 0.115 | -0.9775 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 10 | 15 | 3 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 18 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 34 | 31 | 12 | 3 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 11 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 4 | 22 | 6 | 14 | 18 | 3 | 17 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 93 | 33 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102575 | 0 | 0 | 0.082854 | 0 | 0.33196 | 0 | 0.133334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16971 | 0 | 0 | 0.122761 | 0 | 0 | 0.121113 | 0 | 0.194879 | 0.275343 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281728 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277545 | 0 | 0 | 0.114193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090744 | 0.188296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115952 | 0 | 0.085757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109715 | 0 | 0.102167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281057 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085352 | 0 | 0 | 0.101993 | 0.074914 | 0 | 0.121777 | 0 | 0.142738 | 0.087225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280589 | 0 | 0 | 0.091263 | 0 | 0 | 0.082732 |
suicidewatch | BladeMLG | 2019/01/16 | I thought it couldn't be worse, then it got worse So my last post was about friends not being nice and stuff and if you want to read it, you can check my profile and stuff and click it.
I am feeling bad every single day. Every day is the same. I wake up feeling neutral, I think I'm having a good day at school and when... | 1.849296 | 3.604169 | 3.039191 | 93.329928 | 78.169884 | 5.894309 | 21.49253 | 6.70267 | 0.273841 | 1,941 | 53 | 433 | 18 | 46 | 625 | 214 | 518 | 0.107 | 0.704 | 0.189 | 0.9908 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 49 | 9 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 21 | 41 | 3 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 53 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 94 | 106 | 46 | 0 | 11 | 18 | 2 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 31 | 33 | 0 | 2 | 26 | 3 | 1 | 6 | 15 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 33 | 8 | 91 | 28 | 39 | 64 | 6 | 54 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 60 | 17 | 0 | 11 | 35 | 297 | 122 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122499 | 0 | 0 | 0.048915 | 0.101791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121322 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051072 | 0.149147 | 0.067554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069958 | 0.062364 | 0 | 0.129413 | 0.05269 | 0.064132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06768 | 0 | 0.31558 | 0 | 0.052683 | 0.062083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257678 | 0 | 0.054973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216494 | 0.087395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.330801 | 0 | 0.031957 | 0 | 0.034762 | 0.153911 | 0.097841 | 0 | 0.067382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061355 | 0.060752 | 0 | 0 | 0.06548 | 0.06905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063696 | 0.268925 | 0.099718 | 0 | 0 | 0.132916 | 0 | 0.043204 | 0.149415 | 0.12261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066771 | 0 | 0.110411 | 0 | 0.040829 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067918 | 0.066238 | 0.058391 | 0.084811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122367 | 0 | 0 | 0.06289 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101196 | 0.068754 | 0 | 0 | 0.051826 | 0.047089 | 0 | 0 | 0.043294 | 0 | 0.097696 | 0.051138 | 0 | 0 | 0.140043 | 0 | 0.069411 | 0 | 0 | 0.04599 | 0.147491 | 0.053462 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081273 | 0.11758 | 0 | 0.194238 | 0.142667 | 0 | 0 | 0.175342 | 0.067959 | 0.083056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052828 | 0 | 0 | 0.144311 | 0 | 0.049064 | 0 | 0 | 0.113404 | 0.055193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124668 | 0.043451 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | dudewhynot | 2019/01/16 | Feel so lonely it physically hurts my chest I have friends i talk to occasionally, but it feels like there’s this huge void making me feel so so so lonely. Like I I’m torn between wanting to be so alone that i just end up finally getting it over with and holding onto hope that i meet someone I can talk deeper to. Idk p... | 3.819886 | 6.164728 | 4.522727 | 82.229091 | 74.340909 | 7.127273 | 29.181818 | 8.076483 | 2.152041 | 369 | 16 | 67 | 6 | 8 | 118 | 63 | 88 | 0.268 | 0.584 | 0.148 | -0.9042 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 14 | 13 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 4 | 12 | 12 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 43 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.37061 | 0.174544 | 0 | 0.267643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188763 | 0 | 0.127648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242667 | 0 | 0 | 0.261552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238727 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207013 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.392754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144108 | 0.193932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ToastyAlligator | 2019/01/16 | I feel so empty I feel so empty and emotionally drained. I have friends but I know they don’t care. I have one friend who says he’ll be there for me but he always makes excuses to get out of seeing me. I irritate people and I’m insensitive towards them. I just want everything to stop. I want to disappear for a while to... | 1.013529 | 3.430705 | 3.111275 | 87.895735 | 85.666667 | 6.929412 | 22.22549 | 8.076483 | 1.372867 | 394 | 14 | 83 | 9 | 12 | 133 | 67 | 102 | 0.251 | 0.557 | 0.192 | -0.8006 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 22 | 23 | 13 | 2 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 17 | 6 | 11 | 19 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 54 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178404 | 0 | 0 | 0.15073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181602 | 0.182818 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167201 | 0.157261 | 0 | 0.164956 | 0 | 0.176951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.405569 | 0 | 0.09142 | 0 | 0 | 0.146765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116801 | 0.177403 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139152 | 0 | 0 | 0.418311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112121 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.309624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | yyy3456g | 2019/01/16 | Back in September last year I tried to kill myself because of social anxiety around girls which left me in coma for two weeks in a half and hospitalized for in total of a month and a half. And I'm already feeling suicidal again. Pretty much the title. I tried to kill myself using antidepressants, because of my social a... | 8.354286 | 6.06236 | 8.564786 | 73.605032 | 62.949045 | 11.773976 | 33.256597 | 10.290406 | 3.073337 | 619 | 17 | 123 | 11 | 7 | 205 | 88 | 157 | 0.165 | 0.777 | 0.058 | -0.9575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 27 | 18 | 13 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 18 | 2 | 29 | 15 | 2 | 23 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 89 | 26 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142587 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099355 | 0 | 0.157531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285905 | 0 | 0 | 0.105324 | 0 | 0 | 0.140388 | 0 | 0.091265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086249 | 0.392998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103135 | 0 | 0.094985 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106885 | 0 | 0 | 0.263428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.282671 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175451 | 0.140544 | 0.12622 | 0 | 0 | 0.111597 | 0 | 0 | 0.076212 | 0.205123 | 0.103645 | 0 | 0.116176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083208 |
suicidewatch | UsefulJaguar5 | 2019/01/16 | loneliness hurts Just hit 20yo last week. what's the point of my birthday if nobody cares. Sure i still live with my old parents but whatever, if i spent most of my free time alone in my room. playing computer games just to skip the evening and go to sleep. no friends, no gf, no plans for the future. Always standing i... | 2.309115 | 4.105757 | 3.193722 | 92.548986 | 76.961165 | 6.519525 | 23.09493 | 7.38713 | 0.758608 | 394 | 12 | 86 | 5 | 9 | 125 | 73 | 103 | 0.192 | 0.624 | 0.184 | -0.0141 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 13 | 7 | 15 | 7 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 55 | 16 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214267 | 0 | 0 | 0.172142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.421859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183236 | 0 | 0 | 0.136643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217088 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220137 | 0 | 0.229718 | 0 | 0 | 0.143426 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19557 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207031 | 0 | 0.17529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194984 | 0 | 0 | 0.166284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120634 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122024 | 0 | 0.165948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | AshyDay | 2019/01/16 | I don’t want to die but I don’t know whether I can stop myself from hurting myself, I need someone to talk to me, please... One of the closest and only friends I have doesn’t want to move in with me. My boyfriend, the only person I really trust, lives in another city. I don’t even know how to explain things properly, I... | 1.335911 | 3.086048 | 3.014693 | 92.936157 | 79.698925 | 5.666793 | 23.844402 | 6.522977 | 0.527107 | 683 | 24 | 155 | 6 | 17 | 226 | 99 | 186 | 0.169 | 0.68 | 0.151 | -0.8228 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 17 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 28 | 35 | 15 | 3 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 29 | 2 | 23 | 31 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 99 | 34 | 2 | 0.116442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120599 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089537 | 0 | 0.141964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.362547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076909 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134359 | 0.124654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103499 | 0 | 0 | 0.191981 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233412 | 0.102821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12376 | 0 | 0.086341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078904 | 0.177119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080727 | 0.101673 | 0 | 0.511275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0926 | 0.116579 | 0 | 0.09279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08755 | 0.280776 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077359 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | little-kid-loverr | 2019/01/16 | Having a tough year - Talk some sense into me Last year i owned 4 businesses. This year I own none. I found out last night my wife has had multiple affairs, one of which was with one of my best friends (a groomsman at our wedding). I have life insurance to help take care of my final expenses and maybe help my son for a... | 2.621837 | 4.163341 | 3.516071 | 91.672679 | 75.428571 | 7.34898 | 22.454082 | 8.076483 | 0.911873 | 373 | 10 | 83 | 6 | 8 | 119 | 72 | 98 | 0.059 | 0.741 | 0.2 | 0.9313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 14 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 14 | 5 | 13 | 8 | 5 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 53 | 17 | 1 | 0.184788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202427 | 0.168893 | 0 | 0 | 0.202611 | 0.142767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105019 | 0.154992 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164248 | 0.204441 | 0 | 0 | 0.301254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250435 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174161 | 0 | 0.138938 | 0.148526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.475991 |
suicidewatch | ButtonyCakewalk | 2019/01/16 | I'm just so alone and so tired i don't see how things will ever change it feels like it's always been this way. I have too much on my plate, and when I take something off of my plate I feel like a failure. I am lucky enough to have some people who i consider close friends, but i feel like i'm failing socially, too. i d... | 1.00766 | 3.194882 | 2.051887 | 97.094 | 83.255319 | 5.17844 | 21.456738 | 6.427356 | 0.16363 | 531 | 17 | 120 | 5 | 15 | 167 | 81 | 141 | 0.161 | 0.707 | 0.132 | -0.7882 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 13 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 26 | 22 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 18 | 6 | 10 | 20 | 6 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 5 | 9 | 74 | 24 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142669 | 0 | 0 | 0.114621 | 0.149254 | 0.167384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.284669 | 0 | 0.181968 | 0.124605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.278606 | 0.39364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139412 | 0.10977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1414 | 0 | 0 | 0.137851 | 0.140421 | 0 | 0.106048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080324 | 0.316651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08125 | 0.109341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100285 | 0.139894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167384 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 1randomperson11 | 2019/01/16 | Worthless I really should kill myself | 6.69 | 10.627188 | 6.416667 | 59.745 | 85.666667 | 9.066667 | 22.666667 | 8.841846 | 3.879867 | 32 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 6 | 6 | 0.724 | 0.276 | 0 | -0.835 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.86539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.501098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | odd_thoughts34 | 2019/01/16 | Want to kill myself but can’t. Does that mean I’m fine? I’ve had an accident take everything away from me. I face a long road and I’m getting there slowly, and I’ve felt like it would be easier to just kill myself. My girlfriend has been with me through everything and I’m thankful for her; I just feel like I’m weighing... | 0.061584 | 2.242319 | 2.354864 | 93.318812 | 87.687783 | 5.752941 | 20.264706 | 7.168622 | 0.517376 | 809 | 26 | 182 | 13 | 26 | 274 | 105 | 221 | 0.149 | 0.681 | 0.17 | -0.6474 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 27 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 43 | 57 | 16 | 4 | 12 | 12 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 34 | 6 | 23 | 41 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 123 | 45 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099242 | 0 | 0.136536 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082098 | 0 | 0 | 0.118772 | 0.223422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062849 | 0.088799 | 0.119346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064941 | 0 | 0.070641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110482 | 0.412552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087795 | 0.121452 | 0 | 0.109758 | 0.11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135962 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186913 | 0 | 0.108642 | 0.114437 | 0 | 0.14432 | 0 | 0.079645 | 0 | 0.296036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107354 | 0 | 0 | 0.439885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264893 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | RyRyWright | 2019/01/16 | The world would be a better place if I was gone. I can't sleep at night when I think of all the bad things I've done. I don't want forgiveness, or to be presented with well rationed arguments to the contrary. All I hope and yearn for is the strength and sensibility to end my life to bring justice for all those people I... | 5.147609 | 4.895597 | 5.502717 | 86.334946 | 68.275362 | 9.218841 | 30.293478 | 8.841846 | 1.9792 | 263 | 9 | 60 | 4 | 4 | 84 | 50 | 69 | 0.16 | 0.648 | 0.192 | 0.521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 13 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 9 | 7 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 39 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.271365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200473 | 0 | 0.30212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.289378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192111 | 0.185288 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205417 | 0.316161 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BasedStickguy | 2019/01/16 | Maybe I can just add to the statistics About everyone I know, that I’ve shared my writing and thoughts with, have told me that I’m a very smart and talented person, that I have so much creativity and that I’m a phenomenal poet.
Maybe I should just kill myself, be one of the statistics that everyone reads over, thinks... | 6.335238 | 5.981531 | 6.414127 | 81.136429 | 65.825397 | 10.374603 | 29.111111 | 9.957138 | 2.412378 | 502 | 14 | 104 | 10 | 7 | 160 | 80 | 126 | 0.122 | 0.713 | 0.165 | 0.7036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 19 | 11 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 2 | 11 | 6 | 11 | 10 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 74 | 23 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160325 | 0.113038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137562 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135594 | 0 | 0.178233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143692 | 0.178855 | 0 | 0.088845 | 0 | 0 | 0.171176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.324822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.328639 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.282314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.323411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103586 | 0 | 0.128341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | IrreverentConsumer | 2019/01/16 | Waiting around to die Another day at work, crippling pain in my glimpsed ass leg from working here, no love in my life and so deep into drug addiction there's no turning back. Some of us weren't made for this earth, I'm so over it. I see flickers like the streamer Ice Poseidon who grew up rich, had a nice family life w... | 5.824429 | 5.79668 | 5.845714 | 83.685 | 66.833333 | 9.190476 | 33.809524 | 8.841846 | 2.611202 | 476 | 20 | 98 | 7 | 7 | 150 | 92 | 120 | 0.109 | 0.755 | 0.136 | 0.6626 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 17 | 17 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 7 | 6 | 19 | 14 | 3 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 10 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 58 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214238 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129801 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151833 | 0.181682 | 0.102675 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209202 | 0.176045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277619 | 0.096011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177369 | 0.185954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184423 | 0 | 0.188569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133426 | 0.21376 | 0 | 0 | 0.236392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.286141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | SecretAardvarkThief | 2019/01/16 | Needed someone to listen My dream used to be that I wanted to end up being a counselor. More specifically, I wanted to help people who felt hopeless and suicidal. It was always something I felt so passionately about when I was in my early 20s... and, in some way, I still do.
But, now, everything feels hopeless for me.... | 2.469132 | 5.01594 | 3.051838 | 89.945809 | 80.125 | 6.264706 | 23.161765 | 7.510576 | 1.05496 | 652 | 22 | 129 | 10 | 17 | 203 | 107 | 160 | 0.167 | 0.673 | 0.16 | -0.4869 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 36 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 11 | 11 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 12 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 23 | 27 | 8 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 5 | 23 | 6 | 18 | 18 | 4 | 20 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 12 | 90 | 34 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121674 | 0.158439 | 0.177684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14909 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160626 | 0.094306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122156 | 0.164488 | 0.129516 | 0.151094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123204 | 0.139728 | 0.131421 | 0 | 0.275704 | 0 | 0.073938 | 0 | 0.280806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196029 | 0 | 0 | 0.145239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129975 | 0.161781 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107495 | 0.108427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147001 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1239 | 0.112574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159951 | 0 | 0.137819 | 0 | 0 | 0.117533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097148 | 0.093698 | 0.143669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126295 | 0.161051 | 0.120654 | 0.1725 | 0.11607 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177684 | 0 |
suicidewatch | abouttoendit | 2019/01/16 | I have had enough of it all I have no idea where to begin, might need a new beginning actually. My life as it is right now can end and if something doesn't happen soon i'll do it myself. I know what you're going to say: "you have to do someting yourself, things don't just happen". But everything i have tried has failed... | 2.012728 | 3.214596 | 3.751863 | 90.755547 | 76.344398 | 6.069535 | 22.227779 | 6.339386 | 0.319493 | 875 | 23 | 195 | 6 | 19 | 294 | 141 | 241 | 0.144 | 0.773 | 0.083 | -0.9192 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 36 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 16 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 31 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 32 | 53 | 12 | 1 | 5 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 35 | 7 | 25 | 41 | 4 | 25 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 15 | 143 | 51 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0.119982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12734 | 0.135679 | 0.098324 | 0.102305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101178 | 0.109452 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217796 | 0.127041 | 0 | 0.081208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124335 | 0.087836 | 0 | 0 | 0.112375 | 0 | 0 | 0.134809 | 0.094991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069876 | 0 | 0.098335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21745 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138796 | 0 | 0 | 0.244019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086844 | 0.180203 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103248 | 0 | 0.134215 | 0.104528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091166 | 0.094827 | 0.118747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187019 | 0 | 0 | 0.136522 | 0 | 0 | 0.085239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123599 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139945 | 0.078765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104999 | 0 | 0.097775 | 0 | 0.248865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139523 | 0.11588 | 0 | 0 | 0.098823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163366 | 0.157564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08951 | 0 | 0 | 0.174681 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway34097828474 | 2019/01/16 | I tried to kill myself yesterday Throwaway.
I tried to kill myself at 8.30 am yesterday morning. I have a chronic illness, I’ve been depressed since I had to leave work. I’m pregnant. I feel like I’m drowning all the time. I’ve never had panic attacks before but I have them a lot lately.
My husband and I had a fight... | 2.935062 | 4.531673 | 4.059906 | 87.868114 | 74.714286 | 7.0887 | 27.081355 | 7.793538 | 1.513618 | 1,570 | 60 | 327 | 22 | 33 | 511 | 183 | 406 | 0.241 | 0.714 | 0.045 | -0.9982 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 51 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 13 | 24 | 8 | 1 | 16 | 0 | 48 | 12 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 51 | 73 | 22 | 6 | 4 | 7 | 11 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 16 | 21 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 10 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 37 | 6 | 56 | 6 | 36 | 28 | 5 | 40 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 36 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 22 | 207 | 72 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06767 | 0.179195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.363822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174709 | 0 | 0 | 0.068495 | 0 | 0 | 0.083087 | 0 | 0.162794 | 0 | 0.325527 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164341 | 0 | 0.052525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04021 | 0.056813 | 0.076356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090392 | 0 | 0.063603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263948 | 0 | 0.08741 | 0 | 0.089708 | 0.168411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194259 | 0 | 0 | 0.070377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084522 | 0 | 0 | 0.061335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16924 | 0.093305 | 0.088303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063919 | 0.139017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101913 | 0 | 0 | 0.046372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088355 | 0.323953 | 0 | 0 | 0.082788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086948 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheLifeisgood72 | 2019/01/16 | I don’t even feel like a human anymore I Justin t feel like a sack of flesh. A burden to even move around. I’ve conpletely dehumanized myself. I’m not human anymore, I’m a dysfunctional animal trying to voluntarily put itself out of its misery. A mistake in nature. | 1.486593 | 4.187993 | 4.78022 | 74.021923 | 88.615385 | 6.817582 | 20.89011 | 7.957252 | 1.709749 | 212 | 7 | 36 | 5 | 7 | 77 | 36 | 52 | 0.234 | 0.668 | 0.098 | -0.7845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 21 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.548186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.36509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27949 | 0.394889 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Boneco_De_Neve | 2019/01/16 | I'm sick of this meaningless life. I've never asked for a perfect life, I just wanted a regular one. Having good friends, relationships, a job, basic things that would make me want to wake up in the next day. But this is too much to ask. I'm almost 30 and at this point I just want to rest, I'm tired. | 2.04375 | 3.20215 | 3.598875 | 92.058625 | 76.1875 | 6.995 | 20.6125 | 7.554174 | 0.375316 | 232 | 5 | 55 | 3 | 5 | 77 | 48 | 64 | 0.179 | 0.694 | 0.127 | -0.6703 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 8 | 11 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 32 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.420077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.317386 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16516 | 0 | 0.173281 | 0 | 0.238942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.397553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159601 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | couldibemorechandler | 2019/01/16 | I know I'm going to do it someday The more I think about my life, my choices, myself and the world, and the more I see other people around, the more certain I become that suicide is inevitably for me.
All my life, I've just waited for the next exciting thing to happen in my life: weekends, seeing (now ex) girlfriends,... | 4.352133 | 5.708887 | 5.204484 | 82.016634 | 70.743119 | 6.183945 | 31.973624 | 5.985473 | 1.797962 | 439 | 20 | 78 | 2 | 8 | 143 | 69 | 109 | 0.113 | 0.771 | 0.116 | -0.1434 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 14 | 19 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 15 | 4 | 12 | 18 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 59 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.390831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120117 | 0.217621 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108291 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.417536 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186449 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20956 | 0 | 0 | 0.18907 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136606 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.314039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261816 | 0.126258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | lightntangy23 | 2019/01/16 | Anger lost control Hey guys, I've lost all feeling. I broke up with my girlfriend because I lashed out her little sister out of anger. I feel like a monster, my pent up anger taken out on someone that didn't deserve it. I've got nothing to live for now. I am gonna drive away on Saturday and just end everything there. N... | 0.673333 | 2.697897 | 2.285747 | 95.892299 | 83.367816 | 4.786207 | 22.310345 | 5.822114 | 0.119772 | 319 | 11 | 72 | 2 | 9 | 104 | 65 | 87 | 0.27 | 0.665 | 0.065 | -0.9607 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 8 | 1 | 17 | 6 | 1 | 16 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 41 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21417 | 0 | 0 | 0.138959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230521 | 0.16285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182316 | 0 | 0 | 0.22571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111367 | 0.22847 | 0.201287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.497677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218728 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Guiltg | 2019/01/16 | I hate myself because of what I've done and can't change that Long story short, I'm 19 and twice when I've been intoxicated I've sexually harassed women. I've never done it deliberately and am cutting down on the alcohol to prevent it from ever happening again. The problem is I hate myself for doing it and nearly every... | 4.316889 | 5.005689 | 6.605185 | 74.423333 | 70.259259 | 9.555556 | 29.074074 | 9.725611 | 2.731963 | 523 | 19 | 101 | 12 | 9 | 187 | 77 | 135 | 0.268 | 0.683 | 0.049 | -0.984 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 11 | 8 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 14 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 16 | 25 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 13 | 1 | 14 | 19 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 71 | 22 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14805 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.425303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125311 | 0 | 0.264749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122505 | 0 | 0 | 0.547092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244655 | 0.122598 | 0 | 0 | 0.151226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106846 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264492 | 0 | 0.241924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09841 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BigMck19 | 2019/01/16 | There’s No Point Anymore. I can’t stand another day of crippling loneliness or the feelings of disappointment I leave in others. Too many times I’ve tried to imagine that things will turn around, that my friends and family won’t loathe my existence, that maybe I’ll become a productive human being.
But it all comes to... | 2.705368 | 5.284974 | 3.889737 | 84.095658 | 79.421053 | 7.589474 | 25.289474 | 8.548687 | 2.081716 | 391 | 15 | 73 | 9 | 10 | 127 | 72 | 95 | 0.191 | 0.725 | 0.083 | -0.8193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 16 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 9 | 8 | 4 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 48 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223503 | 0 | 0 | 0.211384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183607 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137462 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.407341 | 0 | 0 | 0.200935 | 0 | 0.107773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216097 | 0.214134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20452 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2386 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144712 | 0.231842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | plasticanimals | 2019/01/16 | i might just do it tonight:) i don’t see the point in living anymore when i’m constantly miserable. | 2.1745 | 4.465879 | 3.65 | 86.705 | 79.5 | 8 | 30 | 8.841846 | 2.71 | 79 | 4 | 16 | 2 | 2 | 26 | 17 | 20 | 0.176 | 0.824 | 0 | -0.4939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.419643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.457266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.373642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.448886 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.400006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.337189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | NGC_Phoenix_7 | 2019/01/16 | Almost lost someone I love As the title says, I almost lost my girlfriend. She got into a car accident. A week earlier she was so depressed she told me she wanted to kill herself. And after today she realized wanted to live because of how quickly life can be taken away. So just be careful of what you wish for. Cause wh... | 4.243333 | 5.553677 | 5.569268 | 79.475528 | 70.95122 | 7.905691 | 29.520325 | 8.3441 | 2.293359 | 328 | 13 | 59 | 5 | 6 | 110 | 64 | 82 | 0.169 | 0.682 | 0.149 | -0.5934 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 20 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 14 | 3 | 10 | 10 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 43 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.379113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177853 | 0 | 0 | 0.115395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193004 | 0.194463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095716 | 0 | 0 | 0.207369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107583 | 0.158776 | 0.1514 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133708 | 0 | 0 | 0.167155 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.413286 | 0 | 0.17085 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110382 | 0 | 0.179434 | 0.180884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.334962 | 0 | 0.151845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | yungdeadpopstar | 2019/01/16 | It's getting harder and harder There's something wrong with me. I don't know how to explain it. I feel like a mistake. I'm not supposed to be here. I should be dead. | -0.9525 | 1.159318 | 1.312444 | 98.477 | 94.833333 | 2.88 | 21.088889 | 3.1291 | -0.503938 | 129 | 5 | 29 | 0 | 5 | 43 | 28 | 36 | 0.27 | 0.661 | 0.069 | -0.8074 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 19 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275525 | 0.389287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.284696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.419502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.595779 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | HopeIsAnIllusion20 | 2019/01/16 | 1 hour and I will be dead. Throwaway account because I don't want my friends and my brother to find out that way.
Years have passed full of sadness anxiety and depression. Nothing has helped... nothing has changed... Everyday is worse then the one before it. Only thing that kept me going was my family and friends, but... | 1.602983 | 4.032482 | 2.424759 | 93.813021 | 82.831169 | 5.181971 | 24.643239 | 6.522977 | 0.760609 | 605 | 24 | 125 | 6 | 17 | 189 | 95 | 154 | 0.225 | 0.592 | 0.183 | -0.6214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 20 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 18 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 22 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 22 | 32 | 13 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 23 | 11 | 8 | 24 | 4 | 15 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 88 | 33 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118772 | 0 | 0.307949 | 0 | 0 | 0.127764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094644 | 0 | 0.132113 | 0 | 0 | 0.137313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133724 | 0 | 0.161134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146364 | 0 | 0.078503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239904 | 0.143534 | 0 | 0 | 0.088237 | 0.130223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104066 | 0 | 0 | 0.154207 | 0.152898 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140127 | 0 | 0.103636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105207 | 0.118081 | 0.165206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107637 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091575 | 0.246474 | 0 | 0 | 0.139596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099981 |
suicidewatch | bobthebuilderx25 | 2019/01/16 | Goodnight world, its time to sleep now Its been real. I tried my best but just couldn't cope. Oh well, it was worth a shot right? Now Im ready for the infinite sleep waiting for all of us :) Take care guys
| 0.066977 | 2.227108 | 0.936093 | 103.668791 | 87.372093 | 4.370233 | 15.576744 | 5.683918 | -1.04801 | 157 | 3 | 39 | 1 | 5 | 48 | 38 | 43 | 0.042 | 0.645 | 0.313 | 0.9358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 23 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265197 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.289306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228728 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.536053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.32217 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240814 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ianratman | 2019/01/16 | lol what's up fuckers, i'm gonna kms with a mix of painkillers, alcohol & benzos in a few hours lmao. adios. unless i even fail at suicide (will update, dw) | 1.482727 | 3.247074 | 3.00303 | 93.124545 | 79.30303 | 5.612121 | 23.121212 | 6.427356 | 0.44723 | 122 | 4 | 27 | 1 | 3 | 40 | 31 | 33 | 0.293 | 0.542 | 0.165 | -0.7351 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.481872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.488547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.444043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.493208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | hoagie123 | 2019/01/16 | I don’t know how to kill myself I’m 53, HIV+, had a stroke about 9 months back which caused significant memory loss and now I suffer from seizures. My partner of 18 years wants out of the relationship and has a boyfriend. I don’t have a job and can’t really find work due to health issues. I can’t afford to leave and I... | 0.481224 | 2.180833 | 2.552619 | 95.463214 | 82.197279 | 6.104762 | 19.343537 | 7.168622 | 0.101688 | 520 | 13 | 128 | 7 | 14 | 175 | 90 | 147 | 0.171 | 0.752 | 0.077 | -0.936 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 11 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 16 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 23 | 28 | 9 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 20 | 1 | 20 | 23 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 82 | 26 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138442 | 0 | 0.219506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094065 | 0 | 0.102323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191378 | 0 | 0.213352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187918 | 0.178665 | 0 | 0.199191 | 0 | 0.296841 | 0 | 0 | 0.19064 | 0 | 0 | 0.25434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11534 | 0 | 0 | 0.193299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191902 | 0.143783 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144712 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.318583 | 0.14291 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131074 | 0 | 0 | 0.127898 | 0 | 0 | 0.115942 |
suicidewatch | CapricaCorn | 2019/01/16 | I fucked up I recently graduated in December 2018 and landed my dream job; however, in order to secure that dream I need to take a board exam. I’m not scared of failing the exam, I know I’ll be okay at that..my problem comes from my own mistake I made in 2017. I was pulled over and arrested for running a stop sign with... | 4.984828 | 6.083605 | 5.959397 | 78.162759 | 69 | 9.248276 | 30.448276 | 9.516145 | 2.748926 | 1,888 | 74 | 360 | 40 | 32 | 625 | 226 | 464 | 0.146 | 0.746 | 0.107 | -0.9659 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 56 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 12 | 20 | 4 | 1 | 21 | 2 | 30 | 8 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 69 | 66 | 25 | 1 | 12 | 13 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 23 | 22 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 10 | 6 | 12 | 0 | 5 | 22 | 5 | 58 | 8 | 49 | 33 | 6 | 67 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 17 | 24 | 1 | 7 | 29 | 228 | 81 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0678 | 0 | 0.087894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082855 | 0 | 0 | 0.068149 | 0.074 | 0.108053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101366 | 0 | 0.091045 | 0 | 0.076345 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070762 | 0 | 0 | 0.171472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078497 | 0 | 0 | 0.058537 | 0.080168 | 0 | 0 | 0.238957 | 0 | 0.08355 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097087 | 0 | 0.075386 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081934 | 0.138912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078373 | 0 | 0.158785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176054 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175898 | 0 | 0.098053 | 0 | 0.048707 | 0.072243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1252 | 0.043299 | 0 | 0 | 0.156865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07999 | 0.167723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089488 | 0 | 0.070741 | 0 | 0 | 0.131432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180168 | 0.067405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077386 | 0 | 0 | 0.167563 | 0.099914 | 0 | 0 | 0.095555 | 0.084804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088731 | 0 | 0.141249 | 0.080683 | 0 | 0.100124 | 0 | 0.073313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11776 | 0 | 0 | 0.14072 | 0.103359 | 0 | 0 | 0.254061 | 0.098468 | 0.120344 | 0 | 0.086576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129043 | 0 | 0 | 0.062958 | 0 | 0 | 0.057073 |
suicidewatch | venVin | 2019/01/16 | I seriously don't think I'll ever be happy again, no matter if my life gets better or not I wish I was brave enough to just down these pills and get it over with. I don't want to suffer anymore. I don't want to fight it anymore. I want to lay down and die. | 1.898966 | 2.231289 | 3.899483 | 92.931293 | 75.551724 | 6.489655 | 19.672414 | 5.985473 | -0.265083 | 198 | 3 | 50 | 1 | 4 | 68 | 39 | 58 | 0.257 | 0.545 | 0.198 | -0.194 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 12 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 8 | 10 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 33 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.507625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264443 | 0 | 0 | 0.231502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.272441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.452861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.294306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 4655434b594f55 | 2019/01/16 | Considering suicide to be the least scary and painful way to go This already started for me, whole planning, I started being very generous, giving away money, buying gifts, and reason is that it will be the easiest, the most honor keeping, way to go.
The reasons:
- Soon, world war will start and I will be forced to die... | 8.780799 | 8.958283 | 7.931384 | 70.512913 | 60.653543 | 9.776828 | 41.764904 | 9.236283 | 4.226832 | 570 | 30 | 86 | 8 | 7 | 177 | 88 | 127 | 0.262 | 0.605 | 0.133 | -0.9695 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 13 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 15 | 24 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 1 | 13 | 16 | 5 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 63 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151894 | 0.110074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237106 | 0 | 0.285706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071914 | 0.264082 | 0.156453 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163109 | 0.09226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143665 | 0 | 0.122345 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104685 | 0.146463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.424564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.389702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227142 | 0 | 0.218511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153675 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | FrikFrakILikeSnacks | 2019/01/16 | I don't know how to help my friend. So my friend is very guarded. I've known her for around 3 years and she's never really opened up, but I think she's depressed. Sometimes she says things like "I get so disappointed when I wake up." or "I don't understand what the point of living is, no one cares about me."
I've boug... | 1.601002 | 3.529746 | 2.879549 | 93.362168 | 79.598291 | 6.647708 | 20.892774 | 7.686295 | 0.568528 | 440 | 12 | 101 | 7 | 11 | 142 | 74 | 117 | 0.121 | 0.67 | 0.209 | 0.8672 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 22 | 17 | 14 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 21 | 6 | 11 | 15 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 65 | 27 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127764 | 0 | 0 | 0.162662 | 0.170821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111386 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186298 | 0 | 0.193296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145889 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157379 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.282342 | 0 | 0.095465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.367425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089269 | 0 | 0.161347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123817 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168226 | 0.208959 | 0.212155 | 0.242785 | 0.117081 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117667 |
suicidewatch | Merk_N_Cheese | 2019/01/16 | I just don't know Im sitting in my old highschool bedroom thinking about how I hung myself in this exact room last April and failed. I am 473 days sober from drugs I finished my first semester of college on the deans list. I have a very good source of income. I should be living the time of my life but instead im sittin... | 2.525048 | 4.221592 | 3.7565 | 89.189342 | 76.064677 | 5.724437 | 23.763828 | 6.227272 | 0.561446 | 770 | 24 | 158 | 5 | 17 | 251 | 119 | 201 | 0.138 | 0.795 | 0.067 | -0.9477 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 20 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 29 | 39 | 11 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 25 | 3 | 22 | 30 | 2 | 32 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 11 | 2 | 4 | 17 | 100 | 29 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175789 | 0 | 0 | 0.071833 | 0 | 0 | 0.119334 | 0.104759 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068124 | 0 | 0.090981 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.367499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093559 | 0.109146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19531 | 0 | 0 | 0.060033 | 0.177198 | 0.168967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112447 | 0 | 0.10429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.342302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116866 | 0 | 0.058053 | 0.086104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074611 | 0 | 0 | 0.279825 | 0.093481 | 0 | 0.118175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101357 | 0 | 0.110843 | 0.112495 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.338424 | 0 | 0 | 0.12319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273697 | 0 | 0.174315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068024 |
suicidewatch | OMGoose | 2019/01/16 | Abused as a child, chronic crippling depression and chronic pain condition combined with loneliness I can't make friends, I've tried. I hate my job and corporate culture, I'm trapped in a bitter sexless partnership I'm too afraid to end, my closest family are dead, I live hundreds of miles from friends and family I act... | 7.1708 | 8.568443 | 7.094667 | 70.914 | 64.2 | 10.8 | 43 | 10.793553 | 5.2758 | 336 | 21 | 53 | 9 | 5 | 107 | 54 | 75 | 0.466 | 0.522 | 0.012 | -0.9916 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 9 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 27 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 0.253117 | 0.208473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.402784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.330101 | 0 | 0.111613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1426 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.454636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | shirayuki2195 | 2019/01/16 | it's my birthday and i still wanna die pls help me | -3.73 | -3.598121 | -0.263333 | 104.075 | 130.666667 | 1.6 | 12.333333 | 3.1291 | -1.850367 | 40 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 12 | 12 | 0.262 | 0.47 | 0.268 | -0.2263 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.705484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.455629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.542858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | NEONVORE | 2019/01/16 | Fat, ugly with no friends I’m 16, ‘male’ - and I honestly don’t think I have much of a purpose. I constantly have the urge and itch to give in, because I know how easily I can just end myself. And no one would be the wiser, but I’m terrified.
I have Bulimia and Anorexia (EDNOS) But I’m still an overweight fat fuck, I ... | 0.779014 | 2.928575 | 2.619388 | 92.906565 | 83.897959 | 5.77415 | 21.578231 | 7.071269 | 0.591554 | 730 | 24 | 160 | 10 | 21 | 242 | 113 | 196 | 0.311 | 0.613 | 0.076 | -0.996 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 25 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 12 | 3 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 15 | 9 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 31 | 34 | 18 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 22 | 5 | 13 | 23 | 3 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 97 | 27 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16664 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.284424 | 0 | 0 | 0.106051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081186 | 0 | 0.154167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248103 | 0.148439 | 0 | 0.154028 | 0.091252 | 0 | 0.128418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161059 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088242 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164187 | 0 | 0.078443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128161 | 0 | 0.118033 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160752 | 0.324998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113648 | 0 | 0.128227 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14034 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132482 | 0 | 0.127448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11406 | 0 | 0 | 0.103398 |
suicidewatch | chelowl | 2019/01/16 | Changed my mind halfway through. Just took 6 665mg Paracetamol. My stomach feels weird. Do I go somewhere or wait until I have bad symptoms | 2.109231 | 4.975896 | 1.921923 | 92.860577 | 92.076923 | 4.138462 | 33.423077 | 5.985473 | 1.932569 | 112 | 7 | 20 | 1 | 4 | 33 | 24 | 26 | 0.206 | 0.794 | 0 | -0.6369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.348835 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.441964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.421846 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.434241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.464177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | FScottFitzfuck | 2019/01/16 | Fuck it I've just had enough | -4.204286 | -4.934802 | -2.425 | 118.6825 | 141.857143 | 1.4 | 3.5 | 3.1291 | -3.5598 | 23 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 0.412 | 0.588 | 0 | -0.5423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.745248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.666787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | LatterBite | 2019/01/16 | No girls like me. No career. Not good in anything. I want to give up. I'm fucking done with this life. So Ive been rejected for 22 years straight. Yeah i hugged tons of girls, snapchatted witht hem. Never got a kiss. Never had a girlfriend. Never had success. One made fun of me for sliding in the DMs (yeah dont message... | 2.094659 | 4.694031 | 3.094194 | 88.681373 | 82.285372 | 5.467401 | 23.980254 | 6.855685 | 0.931765 | 1,690 | 63 | 327 | 20 | 47 | 538 | 198 | 417 | 0.208 | 0.72 | 0.071 | -0.9967 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 52 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 14 | 33 | 15 | 0 | 21 | 2 | 41 | 28 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 56 | 85 | 24 | 0 | 10 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 16 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 4 | 6 | 18 | 20 | 0 | 9 | 24 | 7 | 43 | 13 | 46 | 55 | 8 | 46 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 20 | 24 | 14 | 16 | 7 | 25 | 222 | 59 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070793 | 0 | 0.083316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207217 | 0.355975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044836 | 0 | 0 | 0.133743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090992 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.025596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043059 | 0 | 0 | 0.078222 | 0.701995 | 0.026448 | 0.097123 | 0.02877 | 0.04246 | 0.080975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045348 | 0 | 0.051953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055001 | 0 | 0.143025 | 0.024732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056634 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0479 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037536 | 0.117129 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043231 | 0.096307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038062 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.029518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089575 | 0.040182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110695 | 0 | 0.195595 |
suicidewatch | randomguy_39659926 | 2019/01/16 | Long Annoying Whine-Rant of a Disaffected Loser I'm 27 and I feel like my life is slipping through my fingers.
I went to college for art, but as soon as the going got tough I stopped improving and just sort of gave up. Something I wanted so badly now just seems so far out of reach. It's been five years since we gradua... | 2.811607 | 4.583873 | 4.266346 | 85.51436 | 75.468254 | 7.317593 | 26.098214 | 8.127753 | 1.60751 | 2,943 | 108 | 601 | 49 | 64 | 977 | 302 | 756 | 0.2 | 0.659 | 0.141 | -0.9938 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 104 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 15 | 43 | 47 | 4 | 5 | 26 | 2 | 64 | 10 | 2 | 4 | 11 | 102 | 125 | 55 | 0 | 16 | 25 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 3 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 39 | 32 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 7 | 3 | 11 | 22 | 20 | 3 | 5 | 21 | 14 | 75 | 27 | 89 | 82 | 13 | 86 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 33 | 40 | 0 | 18 | 35 | 392 | 114 | 29 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048711 | 0.071126 | 0.064431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093158 | 0 | 0 | 0.150496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119403 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048735 | 0 | 0.051671 | 0.06028 | 0 | 0.077065 | 0 | 0.098307 | 0 | 0.209726 | 0 | 0.164991 | 0 | 0.117992 | 0.083355 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135218 | 0 | 0.182879 | 0.055964 | 0.066311 | 0.048932 | 0.046659 | 0.192958 | 0 | 0 | 0.051589 | 0.18631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065753 | 0 | 0.117311 | 0.061639 | 0.058519 | 0.057944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064123 | 0.047554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059656 | 0.12362 | 0.085505 | 0 | 0.051515 | 0.051628 | 0 | 0 | 0.063684 | 0 | 0.052653 | 0 | 0.077884 | 0.059147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058792 | 0 | 0 | 0.068326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134984 | 0 | 0 | 0.054747 | 0 | 0.167934 | 0 | 0.061217 | 0 | 0.118596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16178 | 0.05094 | 0 | 0 | 0.110299 | 0 | 0 | 0.059352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058355 | 0 | 0.074747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049821 | 0 | 0.231968 | 0 | 0.118085 | 0 | 0.10622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096518 | 0 | 0.058381 | 0 | 0.049431 | 0.134737 | 0 | 0.065306 | 0.041293 | 0 | 0.04659 | 0.048774 | 0.26731 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116274 | 0.074763 | 0.114636 | 0 | 0.034018 | 0.134105 | 0.055299 | 0 | 0.064817 | 0.039609 | 0 | 0 | 0.060733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13764 | 0.046307 | 0 | 0 | 0.157362 | 0.162243 | 0.052642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063266 | 0.25483 | 0 | 0.059453 | 0.082885 | 0 | 0 | 0.150274 |
suicidewatch | tmax-400 | 2019/01/16 | I seem to get further away from the idea of suicide every day and it's making me feel very uncomfortable I was always thinking that I'll never make it to 20 and I'm 22 now. Every day I become more conscious of the fact that suicide can never be an option for me because there are people who love me and I don't want to r... | 2.036778 | 3.797833 | 3.757018 | 88.366509 | 77.64 | 6.145455 | 23.363636 | 6.980633 | 0.76556 | 472 | 15 | 99 | 5 | 11 | 158 | 77 | 125 | 0.211 | 0.687 | 0.102 | -0.9436 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 28 | 25 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 16 | 3 | 12 | 23 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 66 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127567 | 0 | 0 | 0.104257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14404 | 0 | 0 | 0.093457 | 0.16932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197745 | 0 | 0.132046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.310074 | 0.109525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13627 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108288 | 0.1498 | 0 | 0.135376 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138369 | 0 | 0.204672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098215 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172328 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.335394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098235 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252995 | 0.090427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.312473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | GalacticStarX | 2019/01/16 | It feels horrible to continue to go on day after day while having to deal with the fact that nothing will ever get any better. It hurts to continue going on day after day while knowing that nothing will get better. I just wish I had the courage to kill myself and get it over with. Nothing will get any better so what wo... | 6.278108 | 5.642543 | 6.614189 | 80.592635 | 66.027027 | 9.021622 | 30.662162 | 8.076483 | 2.061308 | 290 | 9 | 57 | 3 | 4 | 94 | 42 | 74 | 0.147 | 0.691 | 0.163 | 0.1119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 17 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 17 | 12 | 0 | 19 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 43 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.431891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.419913 | 0.167817 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147242 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.340179 | 0 | 0.277531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18009 | 0 | 0.089458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.468569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115633 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | slinkydoge | 2019/01/16 | How do I stop being suicidal I lay here day after day night after night wishing that I could just kill myself. I romanticize killing myself. Is there a way to stop this?
I’m thinking the only way out is to give in | 0.953636 | 3.287345 | 3.128364 | 88.307545 | 84.909091 | 5.338182 | 20.163636 | 6.742158 | 0.422951 | 168 | 5 | 34 | 2 | 5 | 57 | 32 | 44 | 0.335 | 0.577 | 0.088 | -0.936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 9 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 25 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176496 | 0 | 0 | 0.285127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212058 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.489134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.414895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.369628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241801 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.35093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Throwaway89u928289 | 2019/01/16 | Clearing my head.
Throwaway for obvious reasons. I guess I am writing this out to clear my head.
Ever since a young age (Maybe 8 or 9?) I have had the urge to self-terminate even going so far as to just test the water. My family has never found out although I fear now that I am older (23) they are starting to sus... | 4.276445 | 5.782792 | 5.03977 | 82.546126 | 71.122905 | 7.761804 | 28.063729 | 8.28583 | 1.930188 | 1,450 | 53 | 276 | 22 | 27 | 469 | 191 | 358 | 0.111 | 0.802 | 0.087 | -0.8572 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 36 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 3 | 15 | 16 | 3 | 2 | 20 | 0 | 29 | 14 | 2 | 4 | 11 | 62 | 48 | 24 | 6 | 3 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 28 | 12 | 3 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 36 | 7 | 46 | 40 | 9 | 43 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 16 | 22 | 0 | 10 | 15 | 207 | 64 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091968 | 0 | 0 | 0.073447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111974 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285957 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106509 | 0.187958 | 0.076723 | 0 | 0.081346 | 0 | 0 | 0.121324 | 0.166155 | 0 | 0.08776 | 0 | 0.089841 | 0.173164 | 0.103349 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083943 | 0 | 0 | 0.100702 | 0.070958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052197 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101176 | 0 | 0 | 0.097769 | 0 | 0.090676 | 0.188516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.389231 | 0.04487 | 0 | 0.162199 | 0.081279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078082 | 0 | 0 | 0.122612 | 0 | 0.092269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092736 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070835 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062236 | 0.139702 | 0.195456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063673 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260465 | 0.10354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058837 | 0.09443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073187 | 0 | 0.095813 | 0 | 0 | 0.075974 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155637 | 0.070706 | 0.090836 | 0 | 0.065007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100462 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061017 | 0.176549 | 0 | 0.072913 | 0.053555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062356 | 0 | 0 | 0.191225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054172 | 0.218703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066863 | 0 | 0.093596 | 0.130486 | 0 | 0 | 0.059144 |
suicidewatch | ratzy88 | 2019/01/16 | I’ve never wanted to kill myself more than I do right now It all started last March when I bought the new MLB game (terrible purchase, the popular game mode is very micro transaction marketed).
Over the year I spent $7200 of the 16k I made in the summer on video games
Come September I knew I would need to pick up sh... | 4.627545 | 5.994423 | 5.166136 | 82.514205 | 70.090909 | 8.590909 | 28.295455 | 9.017664 | 2.278955 | 896 | 32 | 170 | 17 | 16 | 287 | 140 | 220 | 0.106 | 0.775 | 0.119 | 0.2206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 7 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 13 | 1 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 20 | 21 | 7 | 2 | 8 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 11 | 3 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 28 | 5 | 31 | 12 | 4 | 48 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 18 | 1 | 0 | 26 | 107 | 34 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116643 | 0 | 0.146875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.291403 | 0 | 0 | 0.214699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096811 | 0.097651 | 0.101572 | 0.254385 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08924 | 0.300481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.412781 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266566 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093215 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108663 | 0.077677 | 0 | 0.211276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287628 | 0 | 0 | 0.280658 | 0 | 0 | 0.084808 |
suicidewatch | gajeelisname | 2019/01/16 | Suicidal thoughts Not sure if I should be posting on this or r/depression but I’d figured I’d ask you guys.
21M
Been struggling with Depression and Anxiety for a while. This past year was the worst. My car got wrecked (completely to weather), lost a lot of friends, went through a break up with a girl who was way too go... | 1.943602 | 4.065012 | 2.841075 | 93.09828 | 79.376344 | 6.283871 | 26.462366 | 7.38713 | 1.259991 | 719 | 30 | 155 | 10 | 18 | 227 | 117 | 186 | 0.221 | 0.688 | 0.091 | -0.9855 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 11 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 11 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 33 | 28 | 10 | 2 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 17 | 4 | 36 | 13 | 5 | 32 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 14 | 1 | 4 | 10 | 102 | 23 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129242 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08777 | 0 | 0.098736 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114897 | 0.12066 | 0 | 0 | 0.198489 | 0.107766 | 0.078678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.333496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073352 | 0.108255 | 0.206453 | 0 | 0 | 0.255593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173022 | 0 | 0.129465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140892 | 0.109728 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137178 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087459 | 0.098161 | 0 | 0 | 0.143314 | 0 | 0.123209 | 0 | 0.112696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123611 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134929 | 0 | 0.282357 | 0 | 0.121644 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082701 | 0 | 0.307395 | 0.07526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175256 | 0.280776 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076127 | 0.102447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091686 | 0 | 0 | 0.083115 |
suicidewatch | At-LowDeSu | 2019/01/16 | Hey, I don't know if I want advice, comfort or something else but I wanna talk a bit Like the title says, I don't know what I really expect or want from you guys that I can't find somewhere else on the internet. Maybe it's validation that i'm making the right choice? Maybe it's advice or suggestions? Maybe it's just so... | 3.681075 | 5.565565 | 4.225224 | 86.252743 | 73.362245 | 7.375636 | 24.051334 | 8.13951 | 1.328169 | 3,176 | 94 | 624 | 50 | 65 | 1,004 | 310 | 784 | 0.149 | 0.704 | 0.147 | 0.7402 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 107 | 4 | 2 | 55 | 12 | 39 | 47 | 1 | 2 | 32 | 1 | 61 | 26 | 0 | 8 | 4 | 141 | 122 | 65 | 4 | 12 | 39 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 1 | 3 | 35 | 31 | 7 | 0 | 36 | 8 | 4 | 4 | 31 | 16 | 1 | 6 | 22 | 18 | 98 | 31 | 74 | 90 | 17 | 64 | 0 | 11 | 1 | 11 | 98 | 24 | 1 | 31 | 36 | 410 | 133 | 4 | 0 | 0.053051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087507 | 0.079381 | 0 | 0.044836 | 0 | 0 | 0.035807 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041859 | 0 | 0 | 0.034429 | 0.037385 | 0.109178 | 0 | 0.0381 | 0.050446 | 0.046989 | 0.0792 | 0.048883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04572 | 0.051211 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196733 | 0.057752 | 0.138483 | 0.077129 | 0 | 0.139408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04582 | 0 | 0.043863 | 0 | 0.137448 | 0.074808 | 0 | 0.079315 | 0 | 0 | 0.177441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040924 | 0.038086 | 0.054142 | 0 | 0.034593 | 0 | 0.116966 | 0 | 0.025447 | 0.037555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044334 | 0 | 0.095328 | 0.160439 | 0 | 0 | 0.142781 | 0 | 0 | 0.060024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046626 | 0.270679 | 0 | 0.050508 | 0 | 0.048648 | 0 | 0.094878 | 0.021875 | 0 | 0.079074 | 0 | 0.0376 | 0.250459 | 0 | 0.038066 | 0.242468 | 0 | 0.089663 | 0.045395 | 0.134948 | 0 | 0 | 0.045106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178695 | 0 | 0.032915 | 0 | 0.034533 | 0 | 0 | 0.084037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091022 | 0.10216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090023 | 0 | 0.047624 | 0 | 0.101928 | 0.14342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202886 | 0.076475 | 0 | 0.178035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163046 | 0.09342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100658 | 0 | 0 | 0.075876 | 0.03447 | 0.132851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035757 | 0 | 0.05129 | 0 | 0.051257 | 0.048977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.033665 | 0.107966 | 0.039135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08924 | 0.11476 | 0.087983 | 0.142186 | 0.078326 | 0 | 0 | 0.042785 | 0 | 0.030399 | 0 | 0 | 0.046612 | 0.053859 | 0 | 0.049313 | 0.147777 | 0.105638 | 0.03554 | 0.035916 | 0.054524 | 0.040258 | 0 | 0.040403 | 0 | 0 | 0.043162 | 0 | 0.032597 | 0.045471 | 0.04563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | iStillFeelAlive | 2019/01/16 | I just wish something would fuckong kill me already I'm a fucked up crazy demented hermpabridote freak. I get no fuckong joy out of life. I cant fuckong at and having to fucking alive all I want is to fuckong die every time I get money I try to kill myself but I'm such a stupid retarded faggot freak that I cant even fu... | 3.500378 | 4.361571 | 4.586112 | 87.522753 | 72.258786 | 6.713273 | 29.562736 | 6.574016 | 1.406899 | 1,184 | 48 | 247 | 8 | 22 | 388 | 143 | 313 | 0.403 | 0.524 | 0.073 | -0.9994 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 20 | 38 | 27 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 29 | 21 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 29 | 61 | 16 | 13 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 36 | 3 | 38 | 49 | 2 | 31 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 17 | 5 | 15 | 17 | 2 | 13 | 154 | 44 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05399 | 0.043963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040748 | 0.056471 | 0 | 0.032914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045203 | 0 | 0 | 0.033709 | 0.046165 | 0.043 | 0.048767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.754915 | 0.159986 | 0 | 0.029005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.034209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050646 | 0 | 0.395248 | 0 | 0.028048 | 0.041601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104376 | 0.036048 | 0.024934 | 0 | 0.045066 | 0.045165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035382 | 0.044563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087169 | 0 | 0 | 0.051096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.03929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.032702 | 0 | 0 | 0.02976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230261 | 0 | 0.117378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072509 | 0.0558 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | FadingFriend | 2019/01/16 | I’m able to ignore sadness, but it feels so comforting to embrace it. Life is indifferent to how I feel so why not go to where I’ll end up anyway. In my family, I am the favorite. I was the one everyone could ignore because I was the youngest. I was also the one who defended my siblings so I could somehow change how my... | 1.600239 | 3.625824 | 3.874625 | 85.742225 | 80.052632 | 7.303349 | 25.275917 | 8.296473 | 1.737975 | 864 | 34 | 180 | 18 | 22 | 298 | 118 | 228 | 0.095 | 0.699 | 0.206 | 0.9849 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 16 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 26 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 38 | 41 | 15 | 1 | 7 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 4 | 37 | 6 | 20 | 31 | 2 | 20 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 10 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 135 | 46 | 3 | 0.114586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126448 | 0.091634 | 0.190689 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139701 | 0 | 0.097504 | 0 | 0.12025 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116828 | 0 | 0.121216 | 0.098705 | 0.120141 | 0 | 0 | 0.365949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095722 | 0 | 0.304466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.328474 | 0 | 0 | 0.216042 | 0 | 0.115876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138557 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109921 | 0.065122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080935 | 0 | 0 | 0.101181 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103418 | 0 | 0.076487 | 0.116172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100052 | 0 | 0.125781 | 0.216641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073406 | 0 | 0.113139 | 0.246044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115967 | 0.18262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077796 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098965 | 0 | 0 | 0.135171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103396 | 0 | 0.131768 | 0 | 0 | 0.166839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | amitheassholegf | 2019/01/16 | The revolving door of bipolar disorder is almost over I don’t want to be alive anymore. You know,all the other times I’ve tried to kill myself I’ve always thought about what would happen if I survived because I guess there was always a part of me that wanted to. I don’t feel that way this time. I’m not planning for wha... | 0.857647 | 3.054282 | 2.367179 | 94.540157 | 83.968153 | 4.458449 | 23.248033 | 5.528933 | 0.232007 | 589 | 22 | 126 | 3 | 17 | 191 | 90 | 157 | 0.122 | 0.718 | 0.16 | 0.4574 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 18 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 18 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 21 | 35 | 5 | 2 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 23 | 3 | 13 | 26 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 81 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150004 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.445687 | 0.104744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273952 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.378719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138489 | 0.078265 | 0 | 0 | 0.125646 | 0 | 0 | 0.165023 | 0 | 0.264937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165733 | 0 | 0.24698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118925 | 0.1747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176713 | 0.118905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15213 | 0 | 0.106414 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | silencedalarms | 2019/01/16 | how should I end my life jumping off a building, tylenol overdose or slitting my throat? I just want the fastest way. | 3.980455 | 6.365177 | 2.645455 | 95.688182 | 74 | 4.4 | 38.272727 | 3.1291 | 1.826018 | 93 | 6 | 18 | 0 | 2 | 26 | 20 | 22 | 0 | 0.933 | 0.067 | 0.0772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 11 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.58899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.469707 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.392233 | 0.527844 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | EnderCjh | 2019/01/16 | Why though? Again? Hey, I’m just gonna cut to the chase. Why am I suicidal again. Everything is good in my life, I haven’t got anything wrong and yet I’m still broken. On antidepressants and it works but then it doesn’t. I hate having BPD and Everything else. Now all I wanna do is die again.
Ps. Think I’ve had 6 OD’s | -1.762826 | 0.016529 | 0.675688 | 100.45962 | 105.521739 | 4.618841 | 12.996377 | 6.427356 | -0.742875 | 246 | 5 | 61 | 4 | 12 | 82 | 53 | 69 | 0.269 | 0.703 | 0.027 | -0.9532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 14 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 11 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 34 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192479 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.294588 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.420428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196184 | 0.187071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186792 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255848 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149873 | 0.229805 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.422116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170282 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255732 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | twcatatonic | 2019/01/16 | Absolutely terrified right now So I may have to leave my current place in which case I have a friend who says I can stay with him and for as long as I need. Even with his assurances, I can't help but be terrified I may have to move back in with my parents.
My parents have another kid, who I refuse to associate with an... | 6.120341 | 5.411963 | 6.826479 | 79.181941 | 66.373737 | 10.253283 | 32.367214 | 9.673873 | 2.766899 | 1,152 | 41 | 238 | 21 | 16 | 382 | 164 | 297 | 0.167 | 0.728 | 0.105 | -0.9717 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 32 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 17 | 12 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 31 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 54 | 48 | 26 | 2 | 4 | 14 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 16 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 40 | 8 | 40 | 34 | 4 | 41 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 30 | 15 | 0 | 11 | 17 | 175 | 58 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102186 | 0 | 0.115433 | 0 | 0 | 0.092186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107768 | 0 | 0 | 0.177281 | 0 | 0.070271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098054 | 0 | 0 | 0.178124 | 0 | 0 | 0.110584 | 0.196543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122533 | 0 | 0 | 0.077267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102463 | 0 | 0 | 0.063353 | 0 | 0 | 0.122061 | 0.125248 | 0.117878 | 0 | 0.056318 | 0 | 0.203582 | 0.102016 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116171 | 0.12229 | 0 | 0.13501 | 0 | 0.245041 | 0.084741 | 0.085476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087673 | 0 | 0 | 0.256002 | 0.124833 | 0 | 0.079918 | 0 | 0.120439 | 0 | 0.108973 | 0.129957 | 0 | 0.117278 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196891 | 0 | 0.183345 | 0.115412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131964 | 0.252187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076584 | 0 | 0 | 0.091517 | 0.067219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125012 | 0 | 0 | 0.117476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148468 |
suicidewatch | Minimuffin1 | 2019/01/16 | Help this man https://reddit.app.link/6ReOjoz2vT | 33.5575 | 42.9507 | 12.52 | 12.425 | 51.5 | 11.6 | 29 | 8.841846 | 5.4213 | 45 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0.526 | 0.474 | 0.4019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | goosesandducks | 2019/01/16 | Notes I have my note written, it’s in my bedside table. I don’t know when or if I’ll use it any time soon but it comforts me knowing it’s there. I think about it more every day and I don’t know what to do to stop it | -2.679945 | -1.013413 | 0.468681 | 104.933462 | 97.461538 | 2.971429 | 15.120879 | 3.1291 | -1.527943 | 166 | 4 | 46 | 0 | 7 | 58 | 36 | 52 | 0.058 | 0.855 | 0.087 | 0.3291 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 10 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 9 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 30 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.26669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.330421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.646581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.327873 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251287 | 0 | 0 | 0.228678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.33871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 28293948 | 2019/01/16 | Goodbye People say that it gets better but it fucking doesn't, not for me at least. I'm so tired of failure and rejection. I'm going to take my shotgun and go out into the woods and just blow my fucking brains out. It's not like I matter in any way. If anything I'm just a detriment to society and I'll be nothing but a ... | 1.426307 | 3.285433 | 3.141114 | 91.615069 | 79.856031 | 5.52847 | 21.99238 | 6.427356 | 0.360219 | 955 | 29 | 206 | 8 | 24 | 317 | 145 | 257 | 0.159 | 0.63 | 0.211 | 0.9554 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 26 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 2 | 15 | 22 | 7 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 12 | 8 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 49 | 43 | 25 | 2 | 7 | 12 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 17 | 17 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 9 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 32 | 13 | 28 | 38 | 5 | 29 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 22 | 13 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 139 | 49 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088785 | 0.096045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09542 | 0 | 0.119842 | 0 | 0.120441 | 0 | 0 | 0.220003 | 0 | 0 | 0.185876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097593 | 0 | 0.103094 | 0 | 0 | 0.10171 | 0 | 0.054553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19722 | 0.091772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.398972 | 0.112737 | 0.103498 | 0.122633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108223 | 0.321479 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095898 | 0.119365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079312 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103524 | 0 | 0 | 0.1149 | 0.073109 | 0.082056 | 0 | 0 | 0.1198 | 0 | 0 | 0.149595 | 0 | 0.112723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103329 | 0.109763 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10792 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196439 | 0 | 0 | 0.110748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08112 | 0.173436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106002 | 0 | 0.062912 | 0.124004 | 0 | 0.103094 | 0 | 0.073251 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063637 | 0.085638 | 0 | 0 | 0.097006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | lady509 | 2019/01/16 | Today pushed me close to the edge My grandpa died and all of my self worth went out the door so I started pushing hate on the ones I love and making people close to me not realize that I was worth it
I broke...
I went to a place I haven’t been since high school
The closest thing to me that brings me happiness was try... | -0.26173 | 1.761993 | 1.547453 | 99.701242 | 87.396226 | 5.042767 | 16.380503 | 6.427356 | -0.557972 | 377 | 8 | 93 | 4 | 12 | 123 | 66 | 106 | 0.207 | 0.635 | 0.159 | -0.7834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 14 | 22 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 22 | 4 | 10 | 15 | 2 | 19 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 61 | 26 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157688 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161742 | 0 | 0.450024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165859 | 0 | 0.411392 | 0 | 0.10142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112661 | 0.117184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105335 | 0 | 0.158744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15377 | 0 | 0 | 0.158505 | 0 | 0 | 0.125685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100941 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14402 | 0 | 0 | 0.103156 | 0.165266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281697 | 0.274202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | KitKatMahGamblin | 2019/01/16 | Why am I like this I know it's just a panic attack and possibly a depressive episode but that voice is there just screaming! Noone actually likes you. Everyone in your field of work is advancing way past you. Youll never be beautiful or special. You're. It going to be happy in the life you're choosing. Just end it now ... | -0.018128 | 2.334243 | 1.925556 | 93.588077 | 94.222222 | 5.435897 | 19.145299 | 7.010147 | 0.469094 | 343 | 11 | 74 | 6 | 13 | 113 | 62 | 90 | 0.182 | 0.642 | 0.176 | 0.2437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 12 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 5 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 50 | 15 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0.2284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241297 | 0.201588 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165317 | 0.228691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173546 | 0.180515 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274609 | 0 | 0 | 0.223428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway198012122 | 2019/01/16 | I’m gonna do it soon I’ve only had one home that has always been in my life. That’s my grandparents house, and it is being sold in a few weeks. This is the only place I’ve ever felt at home over all these years.
I really haven’t wanted to live for awhile now, but I have a kid that has kept me from pulling the trigger.... | -0.300571 | 1.204857 | 1.653571 | 101.908929 | 83.857143 | 4.961905 | 13.357143 | 5.683918 | -1.338829 | 354 | 3 | 95 | 2 | 10 | 117 | 68 | 105 | 0.014 | 0.958 | 0.028 | 0.3291 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 14 | 24 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 10 | 16 | 4 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 63 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.603797 | 0 | 0 | 0.23152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212457 | 0 | 0 | 0.141723 | 0 | 0 | 0.177175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.294998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135964 | 0.305203 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209634 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236694 | 0 | 0.160947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12921 |
suicidewatch | gridmatos | 2019/01/16 | I just wanna fucking die I try so damn hard to be okay, but I wake up thinking about death and go sleep thinking about it again. I am sick of people saying that is hard to deal and talk with me ( I have borderline disorder). I TRY SO HARD TO MAKE PEOPLE RESPECT my promouns (going though transition). I feel guilty for n... | 1.754022 | 4.183034 | 3.004522 | 89.90787 | 82.152174 | 5.41913 | 21.156522 | 6.742158 | 0.496175 | 363 | 11 | 72 | 4 | 10 | 117 | 64 | 92 | 0.253 | 0.642 | 0.105 | -0.942 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 16 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 16 | 3 | 10 | 11 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 50 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188488 | 0 | 0 | 0.189747 | 0 | 0.209538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169022 | 0 | 0 | 0.207812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181029 | 0 | 0 | 0.491336 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20301 | 0 | 0 | 0.253501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204662 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234299 | 0.179628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Budmike54 | 2019/01/16 | I just feel like the world wouldn't even blink an eye if I wasn't here Yeah I get good grades and yeah I am in Honor Society, but what does it matter if my life feels like its crumbling around me? If I delete this post, that means I changed my mind. If not, well thanks for trying to help. | -0.538226 | 1.624815 | 0.374435 | 106.181653 | 91.580645 | 3.745161 | 12.58871 | 5.148861 | -1.645813 | 224 | 3 | 57 | 1 | 8 | 68 | 50 | 62 | 0.102 | 0.665 | 0.232 | 0.7633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 8 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 6 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 34 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267445 | 0.37787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138173 | 0 | 0 | 0.221822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186801 | 0.25841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.288082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | pleasekillmern-_- | 2019/01/16 | I’m crying myself to sleep tonight I’ve officially lost all hope at this point
I’m 16m going on 17 have super bad anxiety think everyone hates me and lost motivation
My anxiety is always through the roof. I used to get breaks from it but its constantly present and degrading my mental state; I don’t know a way I can r... | 4.886862 | 5.053774 | 6.091083 | 80.457004 | 68.832869 | 9.64705 | 30.245758 | 9.573947 | 2.536603 | 1,384 | 50 | 289 | 28 | 22 | 466 | 171 | 359 | 0.13 | 0.71 | 0.16 | 0.9441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 13 | 19 | 4 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 29 | 8 | 2 | 9 | 3 | 52 | 66 | 15 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 24 | 13 | 2 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 40 | 9 | 44 | 58 | 8 | 38 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 17 | 15 | 2 | 6 | 15 | 183 | 64 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0.085978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073311 | 0 | 0 | 0.059915 | 0 | 0.337002 | 0 | 0.087377 | 0.061605 | 0 | 0.145007 | 0.156865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147129 | 0.161125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186408 | 0 | 0 | 0.095211 | 0.098818 | 0 | 0 | 0.09678 | 0.170462 | 0 | 0.075885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058193 | 0 | 0 | 0.084189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080527 | 0.074942 | 0 | 0 | 0.13614 | 0.162904 | 0.092063 | 0.084519 | 0.050072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077911 | 0 | 0.078925 | 0.086986 | 0.090422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11811 | 0 | 0.088377 | 0.087509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062231 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192355 | 0 | 0.079519 | 0 | 0.058811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08879 | 0.093466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084107 | 0.122162 | 0.07693 | 0 | 0 | 0.166576 | 0 | 0 | 0.089635 | 0.094993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070065 | 0 | 0.089167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225818 | 0 | 0 | 0.154125 | 0 | 0 | 0.084189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228284 | 0.097036 | 0 | 0.103934 | 0.209802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128284 | 0 | 0.089787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | billsimpson289 | 2019/01/16 | Alone What do I do? I literally have nothing and no one. My best friend divorced me after 20yrs, traded in for a younger version. I have no friends. I have no immediate family. I am injured. I have no money. I have no home. I have no job. I have no transportation. I want to end my suffering but I'm also afraid... | 0.567762 | 2.784834 | 3.097511 | 88.679453 | 85.493506 | 6.151249 | 22.737429 | 7.468242 | 1.030724 | 861 | 32 | 186 | 15 | 26 | 298 | 120 | 231 | 0.143 | 0.694 | 0.163 | -0.7272 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 32 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 24 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 38 | 11 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 8 | 13 | 4 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 32 | 5 | 32 | 32 | 5 | 22 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 134 | 39 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143071 | 0 | 0.11047 | 0.114943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155636 | 0.144969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116389 | 0.131998 | 0 | 0 | 0.130226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213453 | 0 | 0.072172 | 0.132516 | 0.078508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092592 | 0 | 0.138565 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137082 | 0 | 0.152831 | 0 | 0.151836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195144 | 0.067488 | 0 | 0.12198 | 0 | 0.116003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139212 | 0 | 0.139482 | 0 | 0 | 0.146821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.530195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141798 | 0 | 0 | 0.138239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091774 | 0.088514 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162957 | 0.109649 | 0 | 0 | 0.124204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheForsakenNinja | 2019/01/16 | Would it be considered suicide if I plan my death? I want to die in 10 years and was thinking of letting a random person shoot me.Would that be considered suicide if I let someone else kill me?
| 3.547692 | 4.990359 | 4.608205 | 85.178462 | 72.846154 | 7.251282 | 30.948718 | 7.793538 | 2.103472 | 153 | 7 | 30 | 2 | 3 | 50 | 31 | 39 | 0.462 | 0.514 | 0.025 | -0.9775 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 20 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254426 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.271221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.501363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214055 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.536307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.348294 | 0 | 0 | 0.157868 |
suicidewatch | ZonalBread | 2019/01/16 | No hope I’m not in danger right now but I’m afraid I might be soon. After my CPTSD diagnosis my suicidal ideation has only gotten worse. Recovery is going to be very difficult and it’ll pretty much take up the rest of my life. I don’t want it. I don’t want to fight. I don’t think it’s worth it. There’s no hope for me. ... | -1.394496 | 0.602384 | 1.48084 | 97.422353 | 95.372549 | 4.87507 | 15.128852 | 6.543119 | -0.480162 | 355 | 8 | 87 | 5 | 14 | 123 | 67 | 102 | 0.231 | 0.611 | 0.158 | -0.9267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 26 | 4 | 2 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 2 | 12 | 18 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 54 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135881 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.408668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145312 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151234 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.312931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194479 | 0 | 0 | 0.209299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225033 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177683 | 0 | 0.169747 | 0.485374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209654 | 0.146143 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | wallflower4598 | 2019/01/16 | Apricots Is it true apricots and other fruits seeds contain cyanide? Online says they do but idk of that includes the everyday store bought fruit? Could any science people inform me on a lethal dosage and how many seeds/pits I need to hit the dirt. Thanks | 3.91383 | 6.822875 | 2.637702 | 92.894 | 77.085106 | 4.611064 | 24.293617 | 5.683918 | 0.465829 | 206 | 7 | 37 | 1 | 5 | 58 | 43 | 47 | 0.093 | 0.787 | 0.12 | 0.3421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 19 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.315757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.370726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.470753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.344291 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.321905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.36925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.427488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TegansTeaTime | 2019/01/16 | Laying on that grassy knoll wishing for eternal rest I feel like I’m failing everyone in my life. The pain is too much to bear at times. I try not to be the victim of my destiny, but how can I not when the world is beating me to the ground. My support system is non existent. My Love was taken for granted and shattered ... | -0.704985 | 1.418059 | 1.217025 | 100.121356 | 91.977528 | 3.994529 | 16.727894 | 5.51148 | -0.772703 | 637 | 16 | 152 | 4 | 23 | 208 | 108 | 178 | 0.135 | 0.614 | 0.251 | 0.9828 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 11 | 2 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 19 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 24 | 32 | 7 | 0 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 3 | 23 | 5 | 23 | 23 | 5 | 22 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 8 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 108 | 32 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143812 | 0 | 0 | 0.124481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134297 | 0.126313 | 0 | 0.132493 | 0 | 0.071064 | 0.100405 | 0 | 0 | 0.256911 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099271 | 0.068663 | 0.140863 | 0 | 0.248755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.380541 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103317 | 0.104212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28571 | 0.106891 | 0.299099 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159489 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169058 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165794 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.323239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | plantlady420 | 2019/01/16 | I almost did it tonight Last night I had the worst panic attack I’ve ever had. It sent me in a spiral today, I was completely on autopilot all day. I came home from work and couldn’t stop crying. I sat on the kitchen floor and just thought about bashing my head in. I even tried hitting my head on some sharp corners. It... | -0.386514 | 1.582496 | 1.108143 | 103.0205 | 87.4 | 4.211429 | 17.728571 | 5.288315 | -0.861103 | 440 | 11 | 112 | 2 | 14 | 140 | 81 | 125 | 0.164 | 0.767 | 0.069 | -0.9119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 10 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 22 | 25 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 3 | 14 | 3 | 13 | 10 | 3 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 67 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189149 | 0 | 0.193792 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177653 | 0 | 0.190039 | 0 | 0 | 0.18612 | 0.218547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223824 | 0.153266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171346 | 0.121047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.347785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16996 | 0 | 0.166862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114816 | 0 | 0 | 0.198799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270627 | 0.141658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.26903 | 0 | 0 | 0.160607 | 0 | 0 | 0.115037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139804 | 0.099939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152345 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | StairwaytoHeaven11 | 2019/01/16 | Going to a psychiatric hospital? Need advice. I've been contemplating suicide for about a week now. Like seriously considering it. Now it isn't something I want to do but I'm terribly unhappy and it seems like the only way to stop being so helplessly sad. So with that being said I guess I'm passively actively suicidal ... | 2.925578 | 5.16295 | 5.218849 | 76.690221 | 76.697842 | 9.456779 | 27.958495 | 9.85127 | 3.18779 | 561 | 24 | 105 | 18 | 13 | 196 | 85 | 139 | 0.255 | 0.566 | 0.179 | -0.9202 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 24 | 30 | 6 | 4 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 9 | 5 | 18 | 24 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 10 | 62 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142495 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128968 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.341804 | 0 | 0.169107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076186 | 0 | 0.165748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.321278 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195483 | 0 | 0 | 0.144834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16133 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116394 | 0 | 0 | 0.21625 | 0 | 0.140836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123554 | 0.112261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.478516 | 0 | 0.137435 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172019 | 0.115747 | 0.116969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 1030pmtonight | 2019/01/16 | Maybe I am wired differently up here... The last 48 hours, I have been in an overwhelming agony that I have never experienced before, I have never felt more lonelier, and I have never wanted to kill myself more... In the last 48 hours, I have tied my belt around my pull up bar and put my neck around for 2 times now... ... | 2.420954 | 3.950864 | 3.591874 | 90.968916 | 75.940789 | 6.969263 | 19.396842 | 7.699297 | 0.350751 | 1,147 | 22 | 257 | 16 | 25 | 372 | 147 | 304 | 0.067 | 0.775 | 0.158 | 0.9823 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 58 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 15 | 10 | 3 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 41 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 54 | 62 | 25 | 3 | 14 | 15 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 14 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 11 | 52 | 5 | 27 | 42 | 5 | 41 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 13 | 0 | 5 | 20 | 186 | 66 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153366 | 0.08053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073299 | 0 | 0 | 0.228553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068776 | 0 | 0.189242 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076295 | 0.089006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130666 | 0 | 0.082708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057738 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190603 | 0 | 0 | 0.140432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060844 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057499 | 0.174666 | 0.08654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065514 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150429 | 0 | 0.094556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098047 | 0.275919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064767 | 0.069236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114456 | 0.110391 | 0 | 0 | 0.301375 | 0 | 0.081651 | 0 | 0 | 0.116967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101616 | 0 | 0 | 0.104896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.428342 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
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