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suicidewatch | notathrowawaylife | 2019/01/07 | Worth more dead than alive I am trying my best to continue living but I am finding it very hard. I fear I am going to end my life in February. I'm losing my job and my boss is letting me stay until Feb when my stocks vest. I feel like that's the only thing I'm holding on to. I should be looking for work but I emotional... | 1.572652 | 2.987761 | 3.448171 | 91.592776 | 77.971429 | 6.220346 | 22.979437 | 6.88311 | 0.568648 | 1,899 | 58 | 431 | 19 | 44 | 640 | 214 | 525 | 0.256 | 0.686 | 0.057 | -0.9991 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 46 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 27 | 25 | 5 | 5 | 13 | 0 | 44 | 9 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 72 | 104 | 39 | 7 | 13 | 21 | 10 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 18 | 19 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 1 | 4 | 17 | 8 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 9 | 85 | 9 | 61 | 79 | 9 | 77 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 23 | 28 | 2 | 6 | 34 | 280 | 103 | 11 | 0.06277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06582 | 0 | 0 | 0.062251 | 0 | 0 | 0.051655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048266 | 0 | 0.076528 | 0.069325 | 0 | 0 | 0.065873 | 0.11103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064095 | 0.143585 | 0.191995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141216 | 0.055596 | 0 | 0 | 0.124377 | 0 | 0.105773 | 0.05998 | 0.112828 | 0 | 0.118348 | 0.211902 | 0.095216 | 0.089686 | 0 | 0 | 0.114742 | 0.053392 | 0 | 0.068824 | 0 | 0.05803 | 0.327949 | 0.060215 | 0.142695 | 0 | 0.100406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055508 | 0 | 0.11246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12458 | 0.055793 | 0.138892 | 0 | 0 | 0.102332 | 0 | 0.066465 | 0.1364 | 0.064187 | 0.088673 | 0.061333 | 0 | 0.166282 | 0 | 0.105422 | 0.140448 | 0.068521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147031 | 0.050103 | 0.13343 | 0.092287 | 0.046543 | 0 | 0 | 0.066757 | 0.058906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066848 | 0 | 0.143219 | 0 | 0 | 0.069699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107211 | 0 | 0 | 0.062844 | 0 | 0.100039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064433 | 0 | 0 | 0.125631 | 0.063986 | 0 | 0.096647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066905 | 0 | 0.052479 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141586 | 0 | 0.054864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041702 | 0.281544 | 0 | 0.049833 | 0.036602 | 0.072145 | 0 | 0.05998 | 0.06974 | 0.042617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051792 | 0.074047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091395 | 0 | 0.127936 | 0.178361 | 0 | 0 | 0.080844 |
suicidewatch | sparklingvagina | 2019/01/07 | I fucked up my life and don't know what to do anymore. I 19F have not been myself for the past 5/6 months. I had a good relationship with a loving boyfriend but I've had doubts about it for months. After a few months I started cheating. First it was only kissing which happened 3 times with different boys, then i had se... | 0.109185 | 2.096164 | 1.870551 | 98.251595 | 85.351931 | 5.273064 | 16.186953 | 6.556748 | -0.527597 | 835 | 16 | 203 | 9 | 25 | 273 | 112 | 233 | 0.173 | 0.643 | 0.185 | 0.0706 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 21 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 17 | 4 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 28 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 47 | 50 | 19 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 43 | 9 | 26 | 31 | 5 | 23 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 20 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 16 | 146 | 54 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121631 | 0 | 0 | 0.115036 | 0.081107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120385 | 0.121191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237407 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098666 | 0 | 0.254366 | 0.179236 | 0.107236 | 0.060603 | 0 | 0 | 0.194583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102574 | 0 | 0 | 0.114521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126029 | 0 | 0.081931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098615 | 0.314071 | 0 | 0.154856 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277759 | 0 | 0.08527 | 0 | 0.089463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110731 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.371548 | 0 | 0 | 0.124536 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082102 | 0 | 0.185268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101385 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154124 | 0.074325 | 0 | 0 | 0.135276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084446 | 0 | 0 | 0.0824 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | mmscomic | 2019/01/07 | please someone can i please call someone please im sorry please someone i need to talk to someone | 1.568246 | 4.284788 | 1.785263 | 93.543509 | 94.263158 | 2.533333 | 27.385965 | 3.1291 | 0.504986 | 80 | 4 | 14 | 0 | 3 | 24 | 10 | 19 | 0.06 | 0.512 | 0.428 | 0.7845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.737725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.569438 | 0 | 0 | 0.18808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | femoidgains | 2019/01/07 | F/21/5 months pregnant \-Please do not argue with me about ethics, save that for a different discussion please.
I'm 21 and I'm considering either running away and cutting all contact or just completely offing myself after giving birth. I got pregnant despite being on birth-control and taking plan B. I wanted to get an... | 5.831198 | 6.689348 | 6.496014 | 75.948164 | 66.945946 | 8.761261 | 32.173423 | 8.841846 | 2.762613 | 768 | 31 | 134 | 12 | 12 | 252 | 119 | 185 | 0.069 | 0.822 | 0.109 | 0.8194 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 27 | 32 | 15 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 24 | 3 | 25 | 28 | 3 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 98 | 30 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129103 | 0 | 0 | 0.083765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144074 | 0.148494 | 0.15412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121707 | 0 | 0 | 0.09076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134416 | 0.12954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116883 | 0.16616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287169 | 0.263637 | 0.078095 | 0 | 0.109901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146278 | 0 | 0.135666 | 0 | 0.146063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109681 | 0 | 0 | 0.203779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209017 | 0 | 0 | 0.30516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.301675 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141283 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103317 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10909 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11868 | 0 | 0 | 0.162099 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | exagagaidi | 2019/01/07 | im only 14 someone talk some sense into me. i cant take it anymore no ones taking me seriously becayse im literally a kid im so tired all the time and im ruining my life because im so fucking scared of failure and being yelled at but i wont do anything to change it and i actively avoid responsibilities .
i just want i... | -1.16 | 0.827436 | 2.785897 | 85.775769 | 102.333333 | 4.964103 | 23.948718 | 6.671995 | 1.181149 | 286 | 14 | 60 | 5 | 13 | 106 | 53 | 78 | 0.291 | 0.637 | 0.072 | -0.9421 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 34 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141824 | 0 | 0 | 0.117682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151282 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264414 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153091 | 0 | 0.772356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096905 | 0.108763 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143174 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215046 | 0.114943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083388 | 0.164365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168697 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | p4573swi | 2019/01/07 | It doesnt get better because I dont want it to get better I don't know why I come here when I get 1 comment telling me to "hang in there" every single time for the past 5 years. My entire existence has led me to seek some sort of positive affirmation of hope left in my psyche through anonymous text posts over the inter... | 5.636038 | 5.676268 | 6.671818 | 77.370804 | 67.227273 | 9.86014 | 31.468531 | 9.661875 | 2.824357 | 869 | 32 | 169 | 17 | 13 | 292 | 133 | 220 | 0.113 | 0.821 | 0.066 | -0.7893 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 17 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 15 | 8 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 22 | 30 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 30 | 7 | 29 | 26 | 6 | 37 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 14 | 0 | 5 | 17 | 118 | 39 | 1 | 0.126614 | 0 | 0.123557 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097358 | 0 | 0.154366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22396 | 0 | 0.14064 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224285 | 0 | 0 | 0.083627 | 0.11453 | 0.106678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12804 | 0 | 0 | 0.1387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198452 | 0 | 0.071958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14008 | 0 | 0.069584 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137567 | 0 | 0.089431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128367 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.364469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096296 | 0.404179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120867 | 0 | 0.110555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084117 | 0.081129 | 0 | 0 | 0.07383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149361 | 0.1005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089943 | 0 | 0 | 0.081535 |
suicidewatch | JustBarclay | 2019/01/07 | 👋 I’ve used this sub reddit for what feels like a long time on various throwaway accounts but just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has replied to my posts. You are the reason I’ve stayed alive this long so I hope you all have a nice life. Goodbye | 3.146321 | 4.376192 | 3.603915 | 92.823986 | 73.528302 | 6.809434 | 24.570755 | 7.168622 | 0.762475 | 202 | 6 | 45 | 2 | 4 | 63 | 43 | 53 | 0 | 0.709 | 0.291 | 0.9532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 4 | 5 | 8 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 25 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.26962 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142671 | 0.201578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280253 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199301 | 0.137851 | 0 | 0 | 0.499413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2437 | 0 | 0 | 0.166428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway125445414 | 2019/01/07 | Breaking a promise. I made a promise to someone I cared about a while ago not to act on my suicidal thoughts. Now that they’re gone, I don’t have much obligation to keep it. I have nothing else to live for.
I’m just tired of keeping my head up and waiting for the next time I’ll be broken again. I’m tired of this never... | 2.158844 | 4.333715 | 3.760968 | 86.503118 | 78.919355 | 7.036559 | 27.268817 | 8.076483 | 1.842975 | 485 | 21 | 99 | 9 | 12 | 161 | 81 | 124 | 0.286 | 0.629 | 0.085 | -0.983 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 11 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 21 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 12 | 4 | 18 | 15 | 3 | 15 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 59 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121895 | 0 | 0.129239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137557 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269795 | 0 | 0 | 0.082928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118941 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20613 | 0 | 0 | 0.128847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159285 | 0 | 0 | 0.13807 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154794 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155184 | 0 | 0 | 0.140011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115841 | 0.085085 | 0.670838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131196 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | PuroChanged | 2019/01/07 | better went to therapy | 2.9425 | 4.731668 | 6.62 | 54.725 | 116.5 | 11.6 | 29 | 8.841846 | 6.2388 | 19 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0.508 | 0.492 | 0.4404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.514986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.665897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.539787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TaxationIsMemes | 2019/01/07 | I could kill myself on the same couch my spirit died on To give context, I'm a child sexual abuse survivor that has been battling depression and suicidal thoughts since I was 10. I'm also a recovering self harm addict (I'll be 20 months clean on the 20th) and I'm currently 19yo.
A year and a half ago, I was 17 and dat... | 3.45821 | 4.139584 | 4.707342 | 87.279968 | 72.212996 | 8.142048 | 26.492305 | 8.371476 | 1.51029 | 1,035 | 33 | 230 | 16 | 19 | 343 | 147 | 277 | 0.157 | 0.755 | 0.088 | -0.9078 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 16 | 6 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 21 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 33 | 39 | 17 | 4 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 6 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 1 | 27 | 5 | 36 | 20 | 6 | 37 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 14 | 0 | 3 | 21 | 139 | 33 | 0 | 0 | 0.128691 | 0 | 0.118406 | 0 | 0 | 0.09628 | 0 | 0.108762 | 0 | 0 | 0.086859 | 0.180752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092423 | 0 | 0.113984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08672 | 0 | 0 | 0.070047 | 0 | 0.09355 | 0 | 0.112725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222301 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054919 | 0.077594 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083915 | 0 | 0.056747 | 0.104193 | 0 | 0 | 0.086869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.44588 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120166 | 0 | 0.059692 | 0 | 0 | 0.115007 | 0 | 0 | 0.076718 | 0.053064 | 0 | 0.095909 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115574 | 0 | 0.120604 | 0.117619 | 0.103685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113309 | 0 | 0 | 0.089847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172456 | 0.190002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256255 | 0.086213 | 0.087124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139889 |
suicidewatch | stuckinapit | 2019/01/07 | I wish I was never born I’m in my early twenties, and I’m going on my 10th year of depression. I know life gets better, and I just gotta push through, but I’m tired of trying. How am I supposed to get better when I don’t care to help myself anymore? I almost committed suicide 3 times the last couple months of 2018, I d... | 2.343238 | 3.742037 | 4.204211 | 87.043733 | 75.864407 | 7.171811 | 25.132917 | 7.854513 | 1.297647 | 880 | 30 | 189 | 13 | 19 | 299 | 124 | 236 | 0.25 | 0.594 | 0.156 | -0.9876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 12 | 16 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 15 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 40 | 42 | 13 | 4 | 9 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 35 | 8 | 30 | 31 | 4 | 29 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 20 | 122 | 46 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112337 | 0 | 0.123799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124131 | 0 | 0.07235 | 0 | 0.096625 | 0 | 0.11643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099363 | 0.115917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094521 | 0.107198 | 0.100825 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226896 | 0.16029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117224 | 0.107618 | 0.127515 | 0.094095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248232 | 0 | 0.123308 | 0.091446 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158479 | 0.109616 | 0 | 0.099061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13139 | 0.089545 | 0 | 0 | 0.083184 | 0.173048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119373 | 0 | 0 | 0.121485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122712 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065416 | 0.515761 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079693 | 0 | 0 | 0.144487 |
suicidewatch | Neither_Map | 2019/01/07 | Found my old suicide note Is it fucked up that I want to share it? Today was horrible and honestly I'm worse than last time. I won't do anything though, 'cause I'm a coward.
But fuck, after reading it I wish I had succeeded. It tied off everything nicely.
I don't know if I'm allowed to share it, but if someone could... | 1.168147 | 3.012825 | 3.043668 | 92.069865 | 80.621622 | 6.390734 | 22.733591 | 7.44753 | 0.820381 | 272 | 9 | 61 | 4 | 7 | 91 | 53 | 74 | 0.178 | 0.622 | 0.2 | -0.0644 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 14 | 20 | 6 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 12 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 37 | 14 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177866 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244259 | 0 | 0.4119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24486 | 0.181589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2278 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218873 | 0 | 0.129901 | 0 | 0.211162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256178 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227024 | 0.158251 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | njd102201 | 2019/01/07 | I lost another family member to suicide on Saturday This is my blog. I don't feel like retyping it all. Kind words only please
https://njd102201.blogspot.com/2019/01/another-family-member-lost-to-depression.html?m=1 | 16.058077 | 22.389301 | 9.637308 | 37.545192 | 62.461538 | 10.292308 | 25.730769 | 9.516145 | 4.163338 | 189 | 5 | 18 | 5 | 4 | 50 | 25 | 26 | 0.273 | 0.552 | 0.175 | -0.4956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274158 | 0 | 0.147047 | 0.207761 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.302843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.634927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221181 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.319232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.318109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | thisismyaltdonttell | 2019/01/07 | Does it ever get better? It seems like every day is somehow worse than the last and on the occasional good days I still know that tomorrow is going to be hell. It doesn't matter how hard I fucking try depression always wins. Some people are born to suffer and I seem to be one of them. I don't know why I haven't killed ... | 0.336961 | 2.592365 | 2.299641 | 93.662353 | 87.194444 | 4.777124 | 17.498366 | 6.227272 | -0.250107 | 536 | 13 | 116 | 5 | 17 | 178 | 84 | 144 | 0.207 | 0.577 | 0.216 | -0.3313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 13 | 19 | 6 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 23 | 32 | 5 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 9 | 12 | 29 | 2 | 15 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 13 | 68 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099504 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231367 | 0 | 0.102998 | 0 | 0.12411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078985 | 0.216342 | 0.201511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092391 | 0.331662 | 0.124956 | 0 | 0.135925 | 0.100302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1273 | 0.107124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132303 | 0 | 0.197162 | 0.097477 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116846 | 0 | 0.105595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.360417 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081034 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082905 | 0 | 0 | 0.131268 | 0 | 0 | 0.114529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119725 | 0 | 0 | 0.217731 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206566 | 0 | 0 | 0.141068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121867 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | AdryBowGaming | 2019/01/07 | I was recently academically dismissed from my college by the end of the Fall 2018 Semester. I was given the opportunity to appeal that decision. Down is my already submitted appeal letter. Please review it if you have the time. If I don’t have my student status reinstated, probably my life will end. *Start of the lette... | 10.354953 | 9.138563 | 10.5479 | 57.555121 | 58.252336 | 14.167477 | 45.138318 | 13.023867 | 6.239173 | 7,185 | 381 | 1,107 | 225 | 75 | 2,420 | 508 | 1,605 | 0.064 | 0.828 | 0.107 | 0.9971 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 182 | 3 | 6 | 9 | 42 | 44 | 55 | 1 | 8 | 99 | 0 | 93 | 28 | 0 | 15 | 8 | 165 | 155 | 89 | 1 | 16 | 22 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 40 | 77 | 0 | 3 | 22 | 5 | 6 | 30 | 13 | 25 | 3 | 5 | 50 | 6 | 193 | 30 | 246 | 86 | 20 | 210 | 0 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 55 | 95 | 0 | 25 | 83 | 808 | 233 | 103 | 0.073069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.036584 | 0 | 0.080633 | 0.08765 | 0.0304 | 0 | 0 | 0.074534 | 0.114929 | 0.027949 | 0 | 0.036232 | 0 | 0 | 0.030065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112371 | 0 | 0.111355 | 0 | 0.124353 | 0.041162 | 0.076681 | 0.064624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083571 | 0 | 0.037531 | 0.038649 | 0.062942 | 0.191529 | 0.039481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070685 | 0 | 0.22027 | 0.037082 | 0 | 0.038171 | 0.041872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194152 | 0 | 0 | 0.048261 | 0 | 0.061564 | 0 | 0.098505 | 0.035738 | 0.103324 | 0.041111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.019088 | 0 | 0.06229 | 0.061287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.032307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.34951 | 0 | 0 | 0.097953 | 0 | 0 | 0.072574 | 0.143917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.036255 | 0.032474 | 0 | 0.07609 | 0.040157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037359 | 0.180638 | 0.017849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040873 | 0.039882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039797 | 0 | 0.073609 | 0.220909 | 0.038757 | 0 | 0 | 0.029161 | 0.03883 | 0 | 0.05418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174382 | 0.025328 | 0.063801 | 0.152683 | 0.120312 | 0.034537 | 0 | 0.03499 | 0 | 0.078781 | 0 | 0 | 0.073455 | 0.040927 | 0 | 0.036544 | 0 | 0 | 0.075127 | 0.036073 | 0 | 0.041386 | 0.124801 | 0 | 0 | 0.036577 | 0.147899 | 0 | 0.03326 | 0 | 0.206368 | 0 | 0.060443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04185 | 0.114581 | 0 | 0.039963 | 0.082918 | 0 | 0.075947 | 0.219755 | 0 | 0 | 0.067272 | 0.083561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035895 | 0.087013 | 0.106518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049609 | 0 | 0.107067 | 0.076067 | 0.13184 | 0 | 0 | 0.150724 | 0 | 0.028999 | 0 | 0 | 0.098547 | 0 | 0.065933 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21278 | 0 | 0 | 0.025953 | 0 | 0 | 0.164689 |
suicidewatch | Tic-Tac-No | 2019/01/07 | Suicide Recovery Hey everyone,
A couple month ago, I attempted suicide. I was pretty “lucky,” to survive. It wasn’t my first time either.
However, although I’m still suicidal, I don’t have the urge as I used too, or at least, not enough to follow through with it again yet.
Anyways, I’ve always struggled with my de... | 2.927799 | 5.554829 | 4.097639 | 82.651977 | 78.889503 | 7.567432 | 28.310846 | 8.532817 | 2.51454 | 753 | 34 | 136 | 17 | 19 | 245 | 112 | 181 | 0.118 | 0.776 | 0.106 | -0.6198 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 43 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 14 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 25 | 31 | 9 | 3 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 18 | 6 | 19 | 23 | 6 | 20 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 18 | 95 | 24 | 0 | 0.128786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107161 | 0 | 0 | 0.087579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109588 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1425 | 0 | 0.083057 | 0 | 0.221847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133071 | 0 | 0.170125 | 0 | 0 | 0.123061 | 0.46298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195355 | 0.18401 | 0.123655 | 0 | 0 | 0.109546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102796 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252367 | 0.123574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091156 | 0 | 0.102849 | 0 | 0 | 0.134636 | 0 | 0.422615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096831 | 0 | 0 | 0.118569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082934 |
suicidewatch | Orchestrafanboy19 | 2019/01/07 | Why does everyone make my suicidal feelings about themselves? Several times now, I’ve expressed my feelings of no longer wanting to be alive to people I care about, yet every time it’s had the same result. The ones I express it to always go on and on about “Do you know what that would do to me?” “Okay do it, and I’ll t... | 0.929296 | 2.747918 | 2.303991 | 97.207034 | 81.282158 | 5.519105 | 19.191954 | 6.498294 | -0.172786 | 876 | 21 | 208 | 8 | 23 | 282 | 126 | 241 | 0.102 | 0.749 | 0.149 | 0.613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 31 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 1 | 19 | 16 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 23 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 39 | 51 | 11 | 3 | 10 | 4 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 21 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 35 | 10 | 29 | 42 | 4 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 20 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 139 | 56 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095323 | 0 | 0 | 0.077904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101318 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075665 | 0 | 0.096521 | 0.218933 | 0.102959 | 0 | 0 | 0.128911 | 0.289623 | 0.081841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119705 | 0 | 0.130213 | 0 | 0.091624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11957 | 0 | 0.101826 | 0.126743 | 0 | 0.062959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096201 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097833 | 0 | 0.182204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114642 | 0 | 0.097066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086134 | 0 | 0.20026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27028 | 0.090932 | 0 | 0 | 0.206005 | 0 | 0.103372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116341 | 0 | 0.08138 | 0.125253 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Shybie | 2019/01/07 | I didn't think I'd be here but here I am The thoughts are not going away, I keep cutting to feel better I'm almost to the edge. Help me | -2.775312 | -1.130555 | 0.181 | 105.164 | 103.0625 | 2.56 | 12.65 | 3.1291 | -1.855545 | 105 | 2 | 28 | 0 | 5 | 36 | 25 | 32 | 0.054 | 0.715 | 0.23 | 0.7684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 17 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.425957 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.399659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.376214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215085 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.378098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.272567 | 0 | 0.337704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 199dugga1 | 2019/01/07 | sick to my stomach making this post NSFW im sick to my stomach making this post and am quite scared of what people will say but im forcing myself. fuck where i begin. so when i was 16 i wanted to be a journalist and got inspired by another journalist who did a thing on pedophiles and he explored the dark web forums an... | 5.530374 | 5.994218 | 5.53897 | 83.937708 | 67.489097 | 8.351464 | 30.380218 | 8.158264 | 2.008965 | 2,581 | 92 | 509 | 31 | 40 | 809 | 294 | 642 | 0.212 | 0.693 | 0.095 | -0.9983 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 61 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 7 | 32 | 32 | 11 | 4 | 26 | 0 | 38 | 29 | 7 | 19 | 5 | 131 | 110 | 61 | 0 | 14 | 13 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 17 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 32 | 43 | 1 | 6 | 23 | 11 | 4 | 14 | 16 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 34 | 13 | 60 | 10 | 71 | 60 | 16 | 89 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 5 | 31 | 33 | 8 | 12 | 34 | 322 | 92 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141819 | 0 | 0.127124 | 0.038439 | 0.046343 | 0 | 0 | 0.047853 | 0.034678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038603 | 0.040539 | 0 | 0 | 0.16672 | 0 | 0.026434 | 0 | 0.036899 | 0 | 0 | 0.076703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.034622 | 0 | 0.047633 | 0.055932 | 0.044706 | 0.037349 | 0.044013 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101644 | 0 | 0.251441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038407 | 0 | 0 | 0.085924 | 0 | 0.036536 | 0 | 0.038973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043852 | 0 | 0.083272 | 0 | 0.039634 | 0 | 0 | 0.095092 | 0.033503 | 0.160356 | 0.090623 | 0 | 0.073934 | 0 | 0.208092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155382 | 0.042813 | 0.044504 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.327882 | 0 | 0.043032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061258 | 0.042371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072829 | 0 | 0 | 0.036866 | 0 | 0.164127 | 0.173674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046002 | 0.043785 | 0 | 0.034613 | 0.046089 | 0 | 0.064307 | 0.033445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06596 | 0.046142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060126 | 0 | 0 | 0.0476 | 0.040993 | 0 | 0.290713 | 0 | 0 | 0.082986 | 0.05069 | 0 | 0 | 0.138368 | 0.303628 | 0 | 0 | 0.044585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037032 | 0 | 0.068969 | 0.086829 | 0.087773 | 0 | 0 | 0.090476 | 0 | 0.133537 | 0.107613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122772 | 0 | 0 | 0.18127 | 0 | 0 | 0.148923 | 0 | 0.049209 | 0 | 0 | 0.065208 | 0.034854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.028809 | 0.083357 | 0.042605 | 0.034426 | 0.025286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.029441 | 0.094335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112357 | 0.047759 | 0.143118 | 0.051154 | 0.03442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200993 | 0.039129 | 0 | 0 | 0.041801 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088383 | 0.092413 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | YouLookLikeADickhead | 2019/01/07 | H Im so frustrated I keep crying to myself im on my knees I jusr want it all to end | -5.894848 | -6.765041 | -0.214545 | 103.131515 | 141.727273 | 3.284848 | 8.212121 | 5.461319 | -1.616933 | 64 | 1 | 19 | 1 | 6 | 26 | 17 | 22 | 0.316 | 0.626 | 0.058 | -0.7755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.393408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.317212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.773721 | 0 | 0 | 0.318338 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ctr1540 | 2019/01/07 | i want to die i popped hella benzos and had like 3-4 litres of beer so far. i have razorblades all around me. usually i use my blood to make art with it (not via cutting but with using syringes to extract it from my body) but now i want to cut myself open again. i even took my medication it doesnt help though. calm me... | 0.849903 | 2.615537 | 2.724749 | 94.356351 | 81.297297 | 5.850193 | 18.679537 | 6.86897 | -0.055295 | 267 | 6 | 63 | 3 | 7 | 89 | 56 | 74 | 0.198 | 0.708 | 0.094 | -0.843 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 14 | 9 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 12 | 2 | 10 | 7 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 39 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.271337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253055 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246801 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27909 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.433909 | 0.276659 | 0 | 0.296326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | DefaultFreedom | 2019/01/07 | Suicide Ideation is Treatable I used to visit a forum which no longer exists on reddit where people tried to justify suicide. I was completely on board and even posted there regularly for a time.
If you are truly suicidal, know that you are not a problem, but your thoughts are. You need to separate these thoughts from... | 3.708717 | 6.603056 | 3.933226 | 83.379064 | 77.823529 | 7.63066 | 29.370766 | 8.57599 | 2.678586 | 888 | 41 | 156 | 20 | 22 | 275 | 115 | 204 | 0.203 | 0.674 | 0.123 | -0.9685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 36 | 0 | 19 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 14 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 24 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 37 | 37 | 14 | 4 | 8 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 21 | 7 | 22 | 25 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 29 | 4 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 109 | 32 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107599 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090771 | 0.110483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.272277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069599 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059887 | 0.176766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057911 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106193 | 0 | 0.106398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156268 | 0 | 0 | 0.112067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142809 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10092 | 0 | 0 | 0.100829 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109929 | 0.119043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.461051 | 0.119578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169392 | 0.184204 | 0 | 0.120505 | 0.122348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.418278 | 0.061445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.357712 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09101 | 0 | 0 | 0.062153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | AccountToVent_92 | 2019/01/07 | I feel like I’m not allowed to be happy I’ve vented so much about the reasons why I feel this way, and I’m honestly too exhausted to rehash them all in this post.
But fuck. I feel like I’m dragging myself through life watching everyone else succeed, while I’m expected to just will myself to stay around through a compl... | 4.146711 | 4.727396 | 5.282925 | 84.140746 | 70.585903 | 8.520294 | 29.23025 | 8.648137 | 2.055293 | 868 | 32 | 182 | 14 | 15 | 288 | 126 | 227 | 0.097 | 0.754 | 0.149 | 0.8361 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 11 | 17 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 14 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 27 | 41 | 14 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 28 | 10 | 31 | 36 | 3 | 30 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 8 | 13 | 1 | 2 | 14 | 114 | 39 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09033 | 0.097717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091652 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209777 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222009 | 0.235256 | 0 | 0 | 0.100327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101479 | 0.286748 | 0 | 0.124768 | 0.092069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194136 | 0.233701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155066 | 0.268137 | 0 | 0.096928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1169 | 0.074382 | 0.083484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0761 | 0.095846 | 0 | 0 | 0.207534 | 0 | 0.210256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084505 | 0 | 0 | 0.077695 | 0.233998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072925 | 0.070335 | 0 | 0 | 0.064007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074526 | 0.119397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064744 | 0.087129 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | blochmind | 2019/01/07 | PTSD?!? Years ago, I came home to my wife trying to hang herself. I went home from work early, because something felt wrong. I knew I had to get home. 911 was called. Skizofrenia was the culprit.
Years later, almost ten years, I am struggling. I thought it was depression and a small part of me was afraid that I was go... | 3.289169 | 6.165083 | 3.467386 | 86.148333 | 79.531915 | 6.134144 | 25.973658 | 7.44753 | 1.59471 | 808 | 32 | 142 | 12 | 21 | 248 | 128 | 188 | 0.155 | 0.762 | 0.083 | -0.8995 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 37 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 14 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 18 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 29 | 34 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 11 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 20 | 6 | 18 | 5 | 22 | 13 | 3 | 24 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 13 | 94 | 29 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088631 | 0 | 0.100121 | 0.20711 | 0 | 0.079959 | 0.083196 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102097 | 0.114357 | 0 | 0.102713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090443 | 0.084242 | 0 | 0.089861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050556 | 0 | 0.096002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154497 | 0 | 0.052238 | 0 | 0.056824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067018 | 0 | 0.300881 | 0.099308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048848 | 0 | 0 | 0.088484 | 0.083963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100449 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117312 | 0 | 0.108275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225438 | 0.095759 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.467512 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169435 | 0.076974 | 0.098888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114533 | 0.209053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238132 | 0.058302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067884 | 0 | 0 | 0.104089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092688 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109319 | 0 | 0.25755 |
suicidewatch | fabushiki | 2019/01/07 | School is driving me to suicide, quickly. Hello, I’m 14 and am a freshman in high school. I’ve been super depressed and suicidal from probably about 4th grade, maybe younger and I got better, then worse, better, and now worse again. I tried to kill myself when I was ten but was too young to get how it worked and failed... | 2.454691 | 3.229329 | 3.905759 | 91.750075 | 74.646766 | 6.738857 | 23.314805 | 6.803924 | 0.505101 | 1,447 | 38 | 337 | 12 | 29 | 480 | 191 | 402 | 0.168 | 0.703 | 0.13 | -0.9601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 24 | 20 | 4 | 3 | 18 | 0 | 37 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 60 | 72 | 37 | 4 | 6 | 15 | 2 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 15 | 0 | 4 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 12 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 19 | 7 | 44 | 10 | 45 | 48 | 6 | 53 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 17 | 0 | 4 | 27 | 217 | 55 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067158 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103041 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124691 | 0 | 0 | 0.08619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268021 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083221 | 0.146581 | 0 | 0.065254 | 0 | 0.078629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063289 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05004 | 0 | 0.063833 | 0 | 0.06809 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114923 | 0.162373 | 0 | 0 | 0.069245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197912 | 0 | 0.086115 | 0 | 0.181781 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066996 | 0 | 0.067868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050782 | 0.080047 | 0 | 0 | 0.07461 | 0.087419 | 0 | 0.085526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134681 | 0.083819 | 0 | 0.12491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053513 | 0.11104 | 0.075933 | 0 | 0.067047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06441 | 0 | 0.071688 | 0 | 0 | 0.076113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05762 | 0 | 0.08889 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081684 | 0 | 0 | 0.152323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.460051 | 0.060372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086785 | 0 | 0 | 0.165743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048545 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102875 | 0 | 0.074008 | 0.078871 | 0 | 0.065434 | 0 | 0 | 0.089373 | 0.180409 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084586 | 0 | 0.073032 | 0 | 0.165467 | 0 | 0.154416 | 0.053819 | 0 | 0 | 0.048788 |
suicidewatch | Polu9 | 2019/01/07 | I don't know what to do At the beginning I want to say sorry for my English.
I'm 19m
I always tried to support all my friends, but they found new friend and left me. When I want to meet with them they never have time for me.
My family doesn't give f\*ck about my feelings. When I tried talk to my mother about suicid... | 2.516702 | 4.241409 | 3.888954 | 88.10875 | 76.163121 | 6.685816 | 24.515957 | 7.492282 | 1.131728 | 541 | 18 | 111 | 7 | 12 | 178 | 81 | 141 | 0.23 | 0.638 | 0.133 | -0.9678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 21 | 27 | 7 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 24 | 4 | 21 | 25 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 70 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146929 | 0.138194 | 0 | 0.144956 | 0 | 0.155496 | 0.109849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168595 | 0.237596 | 0 | 0 | 0.147505 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167066 | 0 | 0 | 0.075122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118593 | 0.148507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146265 | 0.244559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130284 | 0 | 0 | 0.172127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.336387 | 0.17449 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24718 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098526 | 0 | 0 | 0.089661 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.417584 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | fml96 | 2019/01/07 | Need someone to talk to Life has gone from all time high to all time low,nothing's working out and it's been like that for a while,as much as I've tried helping someone or being there for people,there's no-one there and I have no idea where else to go. | 2.391429 | 3.085287 | 3.145 | 97.45 | 74.714286 | 5.6 | 22.928571 | 3.1291 | -0.237414 | 200 | 5 | 49 | 0 | 4 | 63 | 41 | 56 | 0.044 | 0.862 | 0.094 | 0.3612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 27 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189751 | 0.299103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.319577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199957 | 0.138305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208106 | 0.20991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.271635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.479727 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.330147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192201 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | spoiledmilkcoldsoup | 2019/01/07 | suicidal but afraid my mom told me I’m going to end up worse than her and if I’m so depressed now I should wait until I’m her age (40). I’m in high school but I’ve been suicidal since the 6th grade. I’ve been on and off with self harm since then. My doctor put me on antidepressants a month ago but they haven’t helped. ... | -0.408529 | 1.441323 | 1.623345 | 100.07737 | 86.379679 | 4.809519 | 14.697594 | 5.985473 | -0.986012 | 649 | 10 | 165 | 5 | 20 | 215 | 107 | 187 | 0.292 | 0.607 | 0.101 | -0.9941 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 8 | 15 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 13 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 26 | 32 | 18 | 3 | 5 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 25 | 4 | 19 | 26 | 3 | 30 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 12 | 2 | 3 | 17 | 88 | 30 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152152 | 0.125656 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172507 | 0 | 0.115193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.355371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126081 | 0 | 0.135249 | 0.191093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10333 | 0.123644 | 0 | 0 | 0.076009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089645 | 0.141307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147967 | 0 | 0.073502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130681 | 0 | 0.118098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120709 | 0 | 0 | 0.135595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134782 | 0 | 0 | 0.156639 | 0.106753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142312 | 0.156919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134449 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135355 | 0 | 0 | 0.139524 | 0 | 0 | 0.221268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.292587 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077987 | 0.153718 | 0 | 0.127798 | 0 | 0.090803 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153798 | 0 | 0 | 0.097367 | 0 | 0.136296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | pforperfect | 2019/01/07 | I don't want to fight for myself anymore. I just want to be gone I'm mentally unstable, completely unable to work, I can't maintain friendships and relationship, still a virgin, etc.
I just don't see any point in living. Pretty sure my parents turned me into a narc so even if I'm cured of all my symptoms one day I won... | 2.108026 | 3.67971 | 4.319145 | 85.247138 | 76.894737 | 7.276316 | 21.348684 | 8.076483 | 1.014184 | 355 | 9 | 74 | 6 | 8 | 123 | 68 | 95 | 0.13 | 0.747 | 0.123 | 0.0897 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 17 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 14 | 2 | 9 | 11 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 47 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193329 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217411 | 0.128757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215673 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196455 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191001 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207606 | 0.132097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184282 | 0 | 0 | 0.198325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249769 | 0 | 0 | 0.209294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155343 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18373 | 0.202618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264704 | 0.21204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141919 | 0 | 0 | 0.138481 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | demoniccvoice | 2019/01/07 | anyone up for cyber sex i know it sounds stupid but i found that talking sex with someone who is depressed as well is kinda soothing. | 2.286795 | 4.983127 | 2.766923 | 90.66141 | 82.461538 | 3.466667 | 24.051282 | 3.1291 | 0.179836 | 107 | 4 | 19 | 0 | 3 | 33 | 23 | 26 | 0.209 | 0.629 | 0.162 | -0.359 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.315641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.388804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.494954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248086 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.382483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.362831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.405877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Apeezy1991 | 2019/01/07 | Will pay someone 30k to murk me Serious. Come on over. Just going to fall asleep and you do it. Pm Me. | -2.745 | -1.945707 | 0.071455 | 102.387182 | 122.181818 | 3.578182 | 13.490909 | 5.683918 | -0.904775 | 77 | 2 | 19 | 1 | 5 | 26 | 20 | 22 | 0.119 | 0.881 | 0 | -0.1779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.645124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.425626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.634553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Triggermeelmo2321 | 2019/01/07 | Its been 16hours since my post here... 16 hours that I've been carrying around a 9mm. Forcing myself not to eat or drink anything in my last hours. It honestly just felt like a couple minutes. I just want this to be quick and painless. I dont want to die in the same pain I lived these 18 years in. | 0.34 | 2.471174 | 1.593016 | 99.671429 | 85.666667 | 4.869841 | 20.111111 | 6.182691 | -0.169565 | 231 | 7 | 55 | 2 | 7 | 73 | 50 | 63 | 0.051 | 0.741 | 0.208 | 0.799 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 6 | 2 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 33 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193025 | 0.20881 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274905 | 0.229781 | 0 | 0.240015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.461993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114595 | 0 | 0.207123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.276701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15105 |
suicidewatch | RebelliousGeorge | 2019/01/07 | About me. I just want to stop this feeling of constant anxiety and sadness. I’m in debt, in a dead end job, lost everyone I loved, and my dreams crushed.
I don’t know what to do. I can’t afford therapy or drugs so don’t even talk about that. I just want to find a reason to live, but I can’t find it. I wanted to be a w... | 0.198182 | 1.643479 | 2.407071 | 97.397273 | 82.030303 | 5.612121 | 21.10101 | 6.427356 | 0.020059 | 339 | 10 | 86 | 3 | 9 | 115 | 61 | 99 | 0.203 | 0.674 | 0.123 | -0.7742 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 19 | 19 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 11 | 1 | 14 | 15 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 56 | 18 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170569 | 0 | 0 | 0.127198 | 0 | 0 | 0.184019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.352031 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172515 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210225 | 0 | 0.173812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154789 | 0 | 0 | 0.220233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.454356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | onlytalks_inmemes | 2019/01/07 | I’m going to kill myself tonight I’m a 23M loser virgin incel. I can’t take it anymore. I’m sick of being a social reject and I’m gonna take my life today.
I have my gun ready right now and by the time this post is 8 hours old, I will be gone from this miserable life | -0.629524 | 0.794201 | 2.552619 | 95.463214 | 84.555556 | 4.834921 | 15.261905 | 5.461319 | -0.893686 | 208 | 3 | 52 | 1 | 6 | 75 | 48 | 63 | 0.308 | 0.654 | 0.038 | -0.9568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 25 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.309446 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.39512 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293498 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.420599 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163095 | 0 | 0.265123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | thatniceguy_ | 2019/01/07 | what a fucking fuck shit I am fucking done. Wow. ya i get it life. I fixed on 10th. BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOPE fuck you boiii get outta here.
like, ev. Tmrw, 2.30 prolly a 10 mins approximation, i am fucking doin it. Fuckin,
Bye. this subreddit is very cool BUt bye. | -0.695067 | 0.382459 | 1.139 | 94.317833 | 121.4 | 4.066667 | 16.166667 | 5.985473 | -0.142333 | 198 | 6 | 41 | 3 | 12 | 64 | 38 | 50 | 0.175 | 0.664 | 0.16 | -0.2135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 20 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.906916 | 0.205012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138582 | 0.095853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | poopdukea | 2019/01/07 | Why do people self-mutilate? I never really understood why people do it. I'm not sure if it's an attempt at taking their life or just to see if they can still feel something in a world of emptiness. | 3.439187 | 4.5498 | 5.281463 | 81.538943 | 72.658537 | 8.393496 | 25.861789 | 8.841846 | 1.935189 | 157 | 5 | 31 | 3 | 3 | 54 | 35 | 41 | 0.125 | 0.875 | 0 | -0.5943 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 21 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209689 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228965 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.411626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236568 | 0 | 0.309701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279797 | 0 | 0.22321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.53576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | wastedkittycat | 2019/01/07 | would shooting up a syringe full of air kill me just curious | 3.8025 | 5.742981 | 4.823333 | 81.855 | 73.166667 | 8.133333 | 37 | 8.841846 | 3.5339 | 49 | 3 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 16 | 12 | 12 | 0.294 | 0.562 | 0.144 | -0.5267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.841474 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.540297 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ashfeithrowaway | 2019/01/07 | I made a promise 2 years ago to actively try. Two years ago, I promised my best friend and myself that I would allow myself two years. I would give myself two years to actively try and get better. It’s approaching my date this coming Wednesday and I feel that I have ongoing-ly kept this promise. I have been to multiple... | 5.810673 | 6.093691 | 6.007907 | 81.445671 | 66.860465 | 10.150268 | 30.49195 | 10.035473 | 2.717952 | 866 | 30 | 177 | 19 | 13 | 276 | 120 | 215 | 0.08 | 0.677 | 0.243 | 0.9884 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 18 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 30 | 32 | 15 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 14 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 2 | 37 | 15 | 27 | 21 | 4 | 30 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 121 | 48 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18035 | 0 | 0 | 0.105359 | 0 | 0.081351 | 0.084645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213513 | 0.08997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087629 | 0 | 0.109931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105112 | 0 | 0.06719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091426 | 0 | 0.095899 | 0 | 0.051436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235783 | 0 | 0.053148 | 0.097586 | 0 | 0 | 0.081361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100949 | 0.09042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071853 | 0 | 0 | 0.089827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091813 | 0.192514 | 0.067904 | 0.103136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074781 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113875 | 0 | 0.216856 | 0.08124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280971 | 0.116334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.345331 | 0 | 0.298118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144528 | 0 | 0 | 0.393054 |
suicidewatch | holyshitpuppies | 2019/01/07 | I made a promise 2 years ago. I promised myself and my best friend that I would give myself two years. In those two years I would actively try to better myself and to not kill myself. I have gone to multiple doctors and tried therapy, I have continued my studies, got a job, I was on medication for a bit over a year, i ... | 2.823466 | 3.837434 | 4.422929 | 87.47831 | 74.033557 | 7.565833 | 22.941428 | 8.000946 | 0.991881 | 553 | 14 | 121 | 8 | 11 | 186 | 79 | 149 | 0.048 | 0.575 | 0.378 | 0.9951 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 19 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 18 | 27 | 9 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 30 | 16 | 15 | 16 | 4 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 86 | 34 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100185 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124822 | 0 | 0 | 0.355822 | 0.299871 | 0.123388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106545 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261957 | 0 | 0 | 0.108419 | 0 | 0 | 0.090392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112155 | 0 | 0.25008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079829 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102005 | 0.106942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113856 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253033 | 0 | 0 | 0.090258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208107 | 0.129248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230199 | 0 | 0.331212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160572 | 0 | 0 | 0.363906 |
suicidewatch | chiahri | 2019/01/07 | I’m losing it I don’t know where to post or where to vent out. I’m really close of doing it tonight, I don’t care anymore, my mom doesn’t care anymore. I’m done, I don’t want this anymore. I’m tired of pretending to be a happy girl. I’m so tired. I can’t take this anymore | -1.901719 | -0.11408 | 1.358125 | 99.574375 | 93.53125 | 4.45 | 17.375 | 5.985473 | -0.526931 | 211 | 6 | 55 | 2 | 8 | 75 | 35 | 64 | 0.135 | 0.659 | 0.206 | 0.5267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 18 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 6 | 16 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 28 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.695575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.357549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20536 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.403063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ZoneDesigned | 2019/01/07 | I am depressed and suicidal I want to die but I can't i don't want to cause them troubles, but ik someday in a emotional unstable breakdown moment i will eventually do it. My sister and mom does not give a single fuck about my mental health and self harming myself i even talk about it, they're just done with me.I have ... | 1.370814 | 3.673276 | 3.00966 | 90.071403 | 82.691275 | 5.872651 | 22.735319 | 7.168622 | 0.828359 | 574 | 20 | 120 | 8 | 16 | 189 | 84 | 149 | 0.227 | 0.643 | 0.129 | -0.9511 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 7 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 11 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 21 | 20 | 10 | 2 | 3 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 28 | 2 | 16 | 16 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 18 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 83 | 32 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114137 | 0 | 0.137533 | 0.138453 | 0 | 0 | 0.115967 | 0.135612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087527 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124926 | 0 | 0.067005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102383 | 0.122511 | 0 | 0.127123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064742 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267094 | 0 | 0 | 0.310407 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1056 | 0 | 0.27649 | 0 | 0.136028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.303402 | 0.144953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099637 | 0.319538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Siriusbrunette | 2019/01/07 | Was improving, now I'm worse About a month ago, I wrote a will and was very serious about dying. I live about 6000 miles away from my parents, and I had a breakdown and called my mom, who flew out a day later to be with me. I got a divorce about 2 days after she left, and now I'm in a worse place than I was before. ... | 2.536753 | 3.428575 | 4.217335 | 89.147727 | 74.580808 | 7.179241 | 22.998607 | 7.503016 | 0.750443 | 1,441 | 37 | 327 | 17 | 29 | 486 | 183 | 396 | 0.169 | 0.719 | 0.112 | -0.9592 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 50 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 23 | 20 | 3 | 1 | 18 | 0 | 43 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 62 | 85 | 30 | 3 | 6 | 16 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 20 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 13 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 11 | 40 | 12 | 42 | 62 | 8 | 48 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 17 | 26 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 216 | 60 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058716 | 0.152916 | 0.17149 | 0.047987 | 0.073994 | 0.053982 | 0 | 0 | 0.049341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080279 | 0.066299 | 0 | 0.058919 | 0.129048 | 0 | 0.060046 | 0 | 0 | 0.187229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072055 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077513 | 0.091018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0625 | 0 | 0 | 0.139824 | 0 | 0 | 0.067428 | 0.06342 | 0 | 0.133046 | 0 | 0.10704 | 0.050412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184338 | 0 | 0.080208 | 0.118374 | 0.056438 | 0.155598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075118 | 0.063213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094597 | 0.149113 | 0 | 0.070088 | 0 | 0 | 0.151084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062722 | 0.156141 | 0 | 0.232686 | 0 | 0.079601 | 0 | 0.07667 | 0 | 0.049843 | 0.034475 | 0.070725 | 0.124621 | 0 | 0.059257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082646 | 0.056325 | 0 | 0.051874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095634 | 0 | 0 | 0.082794 | 0.078355 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073726 | 0 | 0 | 0.079552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070585 | 0 | 0.090412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060263 | 0 | 0.112233 | 0 | 0 | 0.112463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053057 | 0 | 0 | 0.064967 | 0.080698 | 0 | 0.328165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047909 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058224 | 0.083243 | 0.168035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.431474 | 0 | 0 | 0.17149 | 0 |
suicidewatch | depresedthrowawy1202 | 2019/01/07 | My Suicide Manifesto Throwaway account because I don't want this traced back to me, but I just want to vent. I read that writing things down sometimes make people feel better, so I want to try that.
(Also sidenote: I chose the word "Manifesto" and not "note" because I like the sound of the word, and I'm not commiting ... | 3.008004 | 4.971419 | 4.212081 | 85.278317 | 75.456376 | 7.215488 | 24.481673 | 8.089153 | 1.443826 | 2,959 | 97 | 583 | 49 | 65 | 968 | 328 | 745 | 0.253 | 0.62 | 0.127 | -0.9989 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 129 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 4 | 48 | 53 | 5 | 4 | 33 | 0 | 43 | 22 | 7 | 11 | 11 | 124 | 94 | 49 | 7 | 15 | 32 | 0 | 13 | 9 | 2 | 6 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 45 | 27 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 5 | 1 | 6 | 20 | 26 | 2 | 8 | 11 | 18 | 67 | 26 | 81 | 72 | 19 | 61 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 33 | 27 | 4 | 15 | 36 | 374 | 112 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054919 | 0 | 0.060522 | 0.043859 | 0.045635 | 0 | 0 | 0.037296 | 0.115018 | 0 | 0 | 0.054391 | 0.038348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084344 | 0 | 0.066865 | 0 | 0.046668 | 0 | 0.057556 | 0.048505 | 0.059876 | 0 | 0 | 0.061224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05634 | 0 | 0.047243 | 0 | 0.118534 | 0 | 0 | 0.060684 | 0.060244 | 0.07074 | 0.056542 | 0.188949 | 0 | 0.05692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145727 | 0 | 0 | 0.108672 | 0.148829 | 0.092417 | 0.052406 | 0.04929 | 0 | 0.051702 | 0 | 0.166385 | 0.195904 | 0 | 0 | 0.100253 | 0.04665 | 0 | 0 | 0.084745 | 0.101405 | 0.028654 | 0 | 0.031169 | 0.046001 | 0.043864 | 0 | 0 | 0.108609 | 0.048499 | 0.175148 | 0.098259 | 0.054147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048748 | 0 | 0 | 0.150705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112164 | 0.116214 | 0.241147 | 0 | 0 | 0.048535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219654 | 0.055603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080634 | 0.040666 | 0.084598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222983 | 0.041711 | 0.175074 | 0 | 0 | 0.118782 | 0.157065 | 0.114066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051845 | 0 | 0.052526 | 0 | 0.059131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054859 | 0 | 0.035135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087229 | 0.054909 | 0 | 0.043704 | 0 | 0.114429 | 0 | 0.056297 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046469 | 0.042222 | 0.054242 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041236 | 0.044082 | 0.047936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.03198 | 0.063035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111707 | 0 | 0 | 0.057095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181009 | 0.258788 | 0.043533 | 0 | 0 | 0.049312 | 0 | 0.098977 | 0 | 0.126136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077919 | 0 | 0 | 0.035318 |
suicidewatch | OddRamos | 2019/01/07 | So close Um it’s 7 in the morning still haven’t slept a wink. I just attempted to hang myself yet my clumsy ass didn’t tie the chord well enough and it slipped between itself. (Amp cable)
This is not my first attempt but this is my closet For a second my body just panicked cause I knew I was going. If I didn’t realiz... | -1.251891 | 0.793963 | 0.729385 | 102.182282 | 96.788462 | 3.542564 | 14.625641 | 5.2151 | -1.175747 | 369 | 8 | 90 | 2 | 15 | 120 | 78 | 104 | 0.067 | 0.862 | 0.071 | -0.1406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 10 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 19 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 13 | 3 | 7 | 9 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 59 | 20 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248611 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250062 | 0 | 0.159846 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244928 | 0.192851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194126 | 0 | 0.435193 | 0 | 0.218377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171917 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BobbyBao | 2019/01/07 | Hopeless alcoholic Plans to hang himself today. | 8.984286 | 13.57159 | 7.368571 | 54.701429 | 74.714286 | 8.514286 | 49.857143 | 8.841846 | 7.216829 | 40 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 7 | 7 | 0.333 | 0.667 | 0 | -0.4588 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.748128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.663554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ThrowawayAccount1326 | 2019/01/07 | Why shouldn't i do it? 24 years old, male. I’ve been planning. Specifically, go somewhere quiet and inject a shit ton of insulin. I’m aware it’s a slow and unpleasant death, but it’s a way to die, and we can’t own guns in the UK, which would be my preferred method. I have nobody to confide in or get help from for Type ... | 4.213235 | 4.789075 | 5.010219 | 86.172743 | 70.434109 | 8.706247 | 27.579571 | 8.841846 | 1.833862 | 989 | 32 | 214 | 17 | 17 | 321 | 149 | 258 | 0.152 | 0.75 | 0.097 | -0.9441 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 27 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 24 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 30 | 46 | 16 | 2 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 5 | 14 | 5 | 33 | 33 | 7 | 36 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 12 | 3 | 6 | 23 | 124 | 26 | 5 | 0.130663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135328 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144576 | 0 | 0.084267 | 0 | 0.11254 | 0 | 0.135608 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123178 | 0 | 0.066067 | 0.093346 | 0 | 0.143135 | 0 | 0.111142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120796 | 0.273064 | 0.125344 | 0.148518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147267 | 0 | 0.087581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184582 | 0.255342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125375 | 0 | 0.137109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125139 | 0 | 0.140877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134124 | 0.108086 | 0 | 0.130757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149425 | 0 | 0 | 0.083724 | 0.128376 | 0 | 0.228572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255278 | 0.136025 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103714 | 0.20962 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185639 | 0 | 0 | 0.168285 |
suicidewatch | cereus97 | 2019/01/07 | How would I go about ending my life while making it look like an accident? I guess my question is based off of my experiences throughout life... I'm a student in college and for as long as I can remember, I've always felt like (or been made to feel like) I'm basically a useless waste of space. Even when I try to make t... | 4.116312 | 4.403341 | 5.163759 | 86.014878 | 70.535581 | 8.229918 | 28.065433 | 8.124752 | 1.626304 | 1,003 | 33 | 218 | 13 | 17 | 331 | 151 | 267 | 0.149 | 0.732 | 0.118 | -0.7766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 42 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 12 | 19 | 2 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 18 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 43 | 44 | 23 | 2 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 8 | 4 | 28 | 11 | 37 | 34 | 5 | 40 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 9 | 12 | 0 | 7 | 25 | 136 | 37 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.339037 | 0 | 0.255641 | 0 | 0 | 0.069642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18141 | 0 | 0 | 0.067641 | 0 | 0 | 0.097857 | 0 | 0.100177 | 0.096543 | 0 | 0.051782 | 0.073162 | 0.09833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079122 | 0 | 0.053505 | 0.098241 | 0.058202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091027 | 0 | 0.106645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144671 | 0.20013 | 0 | 0 | 0.09063 | 0.085999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092429 | 0.096903 | 0.205079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107462 | 0 | 0.208188 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096811 | 0 | 0 | 0.104188 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102951 | 0.229446 | 0 | 0.102438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103645 | 0.081608 | 0.186461 | 0.106836 | 0 | 0 | 0.084715 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094286 | 0 | 0 | 0.136074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.347649 | 0 | 0.10004 | 0 | 0 | 0.08845 | 0 | 0 | 0.060404 | 0 | 0.082147 | 0 | 0.092079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072749 | 0 | 0 | 0.065949 |
suicidewatch | suryadevimusic | 2019/01/07 | Just took 10 grams of Ibuprofren, 25 grams of dried Blue Lotus and a half of a fresh nutmeg seed i blended 50 ibuprofren in with 25 grams of blue lotus i just bought and half of a fresh nutmeg seed into a smoothie and drank it over about 10 minutes..
its been close 30 minutes maybe a bit more...? i cantremeber how ... | 2.009282 | 3.950565 | 2.931795 | 93.417175 | 78.362101 | 5.026443 | 21.384118 | 5.57742 | -0.029463 | 2,037 | 56 | 434 | 9 | 49 | 645 | 283 | 533 | 0.164 | 0.735 | 0.101 | -0.9932 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 55 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 3 | 18 | 26 | 10 | 2 | 23 | 0 | 31 | 15 | 7 | 3 | 4 | 65 | 68 | 46 | 4 | 5 | 13 | 4 | 7 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 25 | 31 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 5 | 15 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 19 | 73 | 11 | 65 | 49 | 12 | 44 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 3 | 32 | 24 | 5 | 14 | 13 | 278 | 98 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079451 | 0.065025 | 0 | 0.051549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07479 | 0.184644 | 0.093932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258656 | 0 | 0.089458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074899 | 0 | 0 | 0.055854 | 0 | 0.071249 | 0 | 0 | 0.08272 | 0.079719 | 0 | 0.213791 | 0.060413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156356 | 0.044181 | 0.081122 | 0.04806 | 0 | 0.270534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075753 | 0.166979 | 0.173574 | 0 | 0.09531 | 0.100209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089541 | 0 | 0.086472 | 0.05973 | 0.123941 | 0 | 0.074672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076322 | 0 | 0 | 0.171469 | 0.084956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089709 | 0 | 0.09904 | 0 | 0.089878 | 0.124329 | 0 | 0.065221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088736 | 0 | 0 | 0.192944 | 0 | 0.099218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080989 | 0.086032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072217 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065102 | 0 | 0 | 0.059855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112361 | 0.054185 | 0.166168 | 0 | 0.04931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281861 | 0.114827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069774 | 0.049878 | 0.067123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054456 |
suicidewatch | rowezo | 2019/01/07 | Why do I want to kill myself? I had a pretty good 2018. I had a loving girlfriend which was the best thing that’s happened to me. I was in my final year of school and school captain, had great friends around me and lots of support, overall I was doing well. At times I felt depressed and more often towards the end of th... | 3.086571 | 4.358359 | 4.025893 | 89.575982 | 73.738095 | 6.77381 | 24.553571 | 7.168622 | 0.860643 | 1,601 | 48 | 344 | 16 | 32 | 516 | 198 | 420 | 0.204 | 0.665 | 0.131 | -0.9926 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 33 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 24 | 30 | 4 | 1 | 16 | 0 | 41 | 6 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 74 | 87 | 27 | 6 | 7 | 14 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 3 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 16 | 25 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 10 | 11 | 2 | 1 | 22 | 11 | 56 | 19 | 53 | 54 | 10 | 50 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 24 | 16 | 1 | 7 | 28 | 238 | 72 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072768 | 0.077533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073673 | 0 | 0 | 0.069679 | 0.098254 | 0.143978 | 0 | 0.062546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10805 | 0 | 0.04283 | 0 | 0.059786 | 0.079158 | 0.147466 | 0.062139 | 0 | 0.078042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080358 | 0.143268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077177 | 0.045312 | 0 | 0.121029 | 0 | 0.072918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117386 | 0 | 0.062229 | 0 | 0 | 0.092811 | 0 | 0 | 0.067136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142101 | 0.100387 | 0.269841 | 0.153932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054282 | 0 | 0.036708 | 0 | 0.07986 | 0.05893 | 0 | 0.154923 | 0.077399 | 0.139136 | 0.06213 | 0 | 0.062939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140952 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233195 | 0 | 0.231677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099253 | 0.137301 | 0 | 0.186121 | 0.124355 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059732 | 0.063412 | 0 | 0 | 0.071232 | 0.070585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074534 | 0 | 0 | 0.05608 | 0.224024 | 0.051649 | 0 | 0 | 0.067857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067416 | 0 | 0 | 0.074824 | 0 | 0.053436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048709 | 0.061348 | 0 | 0.077124 | 0 | 0.079207 | 0.067289 | 0.071479 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04501 | 0.072238 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213319 | 0.111975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07212 | 0 | 0.078975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07865 | 0.04973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153705 | 0.07973 | 0.066219 | 0 | 0.052826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093355 | 0 | 0 | 0.111556 | 0.122907 | 0 | 0 | 0.134272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165763 | 0.055769 | 0 | 0 | 0.126343 | 0 | 0.126797 | 0 | 0.080795 | 0.067728 | 0 | 0.05115 | 0 | 0.0716 | 0.04991 | 0 | 0 | 0.09049 |
suicidewatch | GreenishRainbow | 2019/01/07 | I Wish My Family Was Normal I haven't had a depressive episode in a while since starting my new medication but this one hit me like a ton of bricks and I just cant stop thinking or shaking. I have school tomorrow and its nearly 6 am. I just wish my family went back to how it was and everyone was happy again, I just wan... | -0.558243 | 1.492662 | 1.861651 | 96.649386 | 89.366972 | 5.555681 | 16.641496 | 7.010147 | -0.157037 | 386 | 9 | 94 | 6 | 13 | 131 | 72 | 109 | 0.101 | 0.628 | 0.27 | 0.9583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 11 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 24 | 24 | 13 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 17 | 4 | 8 | 18 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 69 | 24 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126664 | 0.137539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141878 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157403 | 0 | 0 | 0.310578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175354 | 0 | 0.162633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080477 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159094 | 0 | 0 | 0.161397 | 0.158059 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166712 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136263 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116594 | 0 | 0 | 0.137718 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218874 | 0.10555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198145 | 0.142271 | 0 | 0 | 0.291479 | 0.130752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152703 | 0 | 0 | 0.378854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | CaponeAl49 | 2019/01/07 | I dont understand these others, but my reason hell ya These people om here whining about this and that...they can change their lives its within them. Ive not 100 percent commited yet im waiting to see how some things pan out. Heres the deal i am almost like one of those sick people that need assisted suicide. Basically... | 1.963211 | 4.194278 | 3.398621 | 88.549669 | 79.902613 | 6.194797 | 23.325472 | 7.356606 | 0.973546 | 1,643 | 56 | 336 | 23 | 42 | 538 | 241 | 421 | 0.227 | 0.662 | 0.111 | -0.997 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 31 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 21 | 25 | 11 | 0 | 18 | 0 | 29 | 17 | 5 | 5 | 11 | 62 | 58 | 32 | 3 | 5 | 13 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 21 | 19 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 11 | 16 | 2 | 2 | 18 | 6 | 46 | 9 | 45 | 33 | 15 | 50 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 5 | 29 | 17 | 9 | 10 | 26 | 222 | 67 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067554 | 0 | 0.076312 | 0.078929 | 0.084098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079911 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143201 | 0 | 0.063631 | 0.046456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080619 | 0.065647 | 0 | 0.082354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083712 | 0 | 0.078568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066691 | 0 | 0.089316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078744 | 0.084993 | 0.10067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281814 | 0 | 0 | 0.043311 | 0 | 0.060951 | 0.08402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07505 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.576228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084314 | 0 | 0.041882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077928 | 0.269142 | 0.111695 | 0 | 0.067294 | 0 | 0 | 0.085258 | 0.083191 | 0 | 0.068781 | 0 | 0 | 0.077264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056508 | 0.17633 | 0 | 0 | 0.071517 | 0 | 0.073124 | 0 | 0.079968 | 0 | 0.051641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076611 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078355 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065082 | 0 | 0.121208 | 0 | 0 | 0.121457 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075372 | 0 | 0.107882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16672 | 0.172961 | 0 | 0 | 0.057299 | 0.061254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101259 | 0.048831 | 0 | 0 | 0.088876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103481 | 0 | 0 | 0.079336 | 0 | 0.06582 | 0 | 0.06288 | 0.04495 | 0.060491 | 0 | 0 | 0.137041 | 0.070646 | 0 | 0.085084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054136 | 0 | 0 | 0.098152 |
suicidewatch | 293idhe10 | 2019/01/07 | February 3rd February 3rd is going to be my 16th birthday, I plan on shooting myself in the head with my uncles handgun. I've been depressed for 4 years, and have had 2 suicide attempts. I have mild autism, I have problems from an abusive family member as well. I'm failing every single one of my classes in school. I j... | 2.072582 | 3.148867 | 4.262418 | 87.657582 | 75.978022 | 6.958242 | 25.087912 | 7.44753 | 1.093765 | 657 | 22 | 146 | 8 | 14 | 228 | 111 | 182 | 0.143 | 0.772 | 0.085 | -0.9348 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 18 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 29 | 35 | 10 | 4 | 7 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 20 | 5 | 24 | 26 | 5 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 92 | 23 | 6 | 0.109453 | 0.129684 | 0.213621 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094272 | 0 | 0.227191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.513114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113095 | 0 | 0.216879 | 0 | 0.092219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103183 | 0 | 0.166029 | 0.156387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12001 | 0 | 0 | 0.057185 | 0 | 0.12441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16042 | 0 | 0.096649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110968 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116564 | 0.074168 | 0.083244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075881 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110773 | 0.08722 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074312 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120547 | 0 | 0.258234 | 0.260637 | 0 | 0 | 0.098412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070484 |
suicidewatch | MrRandomUnknownpp | 2019/01/07 | Turned 26: I know how silly it is to kill myself, but don't see any reason not to. I haven't done anything great. I've inherited bad anger issues from my dad. My girlfriend doesn't want to be with me anymore.. Our relationship is toxic.
My friends are done dealing with my mood swings (fair enough) so I don't talk to t... | 1.661061 | 3.897968 | 3.204619 | 89.493356 | 81.046512 | 6.141649 | 20.935518 | 7.348243 | 0.670814 | 831 | 24 | 172 | 12 | 22 | 273 | 128 | 215 | 0.265 | 0.621 | 0.115 | -0.9904 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 30 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 16 | 4 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 23 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 33 | 42 | 10 | 3 | 5 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 14 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 27 | 6 | 20 | 36 | 9 | 13 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 7 | 108 | 34 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121267 | 0 | 0 | 0.100625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137766 | 0 | 0 | 0.133496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195258 | 0.135299 | 0 | 0.078859 | 0.126063 | 0 | 0 | 0.126906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108302 | 0.379038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103025 | 0 | 0.109896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069494 | 0.102561 | 0 | 0.134812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130901 | 0 | 0 | 0.127627 | 0 | 0.108687 | 0.135283 | 0 | 0.067201 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084772 | 0 | 0 | 0.134225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078335 | 0.125722 | 0 | 0.131281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130332 | 0 | 0.10223 | 0 | 0.127832 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098283 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162472 | 0.156702 | 0.120138 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133004 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Cosmikitty69 | 2019/01/07 | Im so done I am a lesbian, I've it known for a long time but for some stupid reason I dated my only (at the time) male friend. I was desperate to be happy I thought he was the only person that could love me and that I was unlovable and unwanted and this was my only chance to have someone that liked me. I wasn't attract... | 0.931482 | 2.667706 | 2.865627 | 93.590166 | 80.906615 | 5.995396 | 20.43596 | 6.996648 | 0.282437 | 928 | 25 | 214 | 11 | 24 | 311 | 122 | 257 | 0.25 | 0.564 | 0.186 | -0.9739 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 27 | 4 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 26 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 40 | 39 | 18 | 1 | 6 | 10 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 4 | 37 | 14 | 24 | 21 | 4 | 24 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 22 | 6 | 1 | 5 | 23 | 140 | 45 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104866 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106171 | 0 | 0 | 0.100414 | 0.212392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061722 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161682 | 0 | 0 | 0.130598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088606 | 0.103616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084583 | 0.113894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066876 | 0.091588 | 0 | 0.193501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153588 | 0.144668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23468 | 0 | 0.1058 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107784 | 0 | 0.099965 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.433568 | 0 | 0.109369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071517 | 0.247332 | 0 | 0 | 0.089604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088409 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.343161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099479 | 0.080382 | 0.177122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091364 | 0 | 0.116434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | salmonasparagus | 2019/01/07 | Im on the verge of ending my life I don’t know how to cope with my problems that I face,...I’m tired, I’m hurt, I’m sad and most of all I don’t know what I should do about it. I’m tired of living my life and have to face endless problems that I can’t seem to find an answer or solution for it. | 0.709286 | 0.98534 | 3.018571 | 98.356429 | 78.285714 | 6.171429 | 19.714286 | 5.683918 | -0.459629 | 225 | 4 | 63 | 1 | 5 | 78 | 43 | 70 | 0.253 | 0.714 | 0.033 | -0.9371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 12 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 10 | 11 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 37 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254516 | 0 | 0.256811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.33586 | 0 | 0 | 0.209938 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.45499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.546518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | MichaelJordanOfDumb | 2019/01/07 | I want to die I'm sorry this won't be too coherent, it's I don't know what time and I've been asleep for what seems like a week and I'm too sad to put sentences together well. I honestly just feel like throwing up and crying but I can't do either. I've lost everything and I don't know what to do. I've been depressed fo... | 0.551932 | 2.609171 | 2.605285 | 93.229057 | 84.089606 | 5.288427 | 19.851892 | 6.537328 | 0.104559 | 2,044 | 58 | 457 | 21 | 59 | 686 | 229 | 558 | 0.168 | 0.711 | 0.121 | -0.9843 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 61 | 2 | 2 | 10 | 6 | 24 | 31 | 2 | 3 | 18 | 0 | 58 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 4 | 80 | 123 | 26 | 2 | 11 | 10 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 32 | 22 | 0 | 4 | 18 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 26 | 13 | 1 | 2 | 15 | 8 | 72 | 18 | 61 | 93 | 12 | 46 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 39 | 13 | 2 | 4 | 25 | 296 | 104 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0.056429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060635 | 0 | 0 | 0.114694 | 0.040433 | 0 | 0 | 0.051477 | 0.108117 | 0 | 0 | 0.044464 | 0.096563 | 0.070499 | 0 | 0 | 0.065149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046169 | 0 | 0.063518 | 0.037292 | 0 | 0.049805 | 0 | 0.120027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048305 | 0 | 0.051216 | 0 | 0 | 0.076386 | 0 | 0.04872 | 0 | 0.05197 | 0 | 0.054512 | 0 | 0.116953 | 0.082621 | 0 | 0.063345 | 0 | 0.049186 | 0 | 0 | 0.223378 | 0 | 0.030211 | 0.055471 | 0.230044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057256 | 0 | 0 | 0.0518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102795 | 0 | 0 | 0.317792 | 0 | 0 | 0.061228 | 0 | 0.05913 | 0 | 0.084751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064692 | 0.063123 | 0 | 0 | 0.164147 | 0.038599 | 0 | 0.058093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058387 | 0 | 0.046155 | 0 | 0.085016 | 0.042877 | 0.044598 | 0.111696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039184 | 0.043979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055201 | 0.040089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062345 | 0 | 0 | 0.05813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046079 | 0.052642 | 0 | 0 | 0.118713 | 0 | 0 | 0.115734 | 0 | 0.146985 | 0.044517 | 0 | 0.258922 | 0 | 0 | 0.046179 | 0.048344 | 0 | 0.060451 | 0.066196 | 0 | 0.262477 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185911 | 0 | 0.106475 | 0 | 0 | 0.038416 | 0.074104 | 0.113626 | 0.045907 | 0.101155 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039259 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049942 | 0 | 0 | 0.136427 | 0 | 0.046384 | 0 | 0.051992 | 0 | 0.417426 | 0.06456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042097 | 0.058724 | 0 | 0.041077 | 0 | 0 | 0.111712 |
suicidewatch | alexaxelalu | 2019/01/07 | Killing myself Hello. I want to kill myself. I’m thinking slit wrists, because really that’s the only option I have. I know it will hurt, but will it actually kill me? | 1.392273 | 3.954086 | 3.718409 | 83.097614 | 85.666667 | 5.724242 | 20.371212 | 7.168622 | 0.871067 | 131 | 4 | 24 | 2 | 4 | 45 | 26 | 33 | 0.372 | 0.598 | 0.03 | -0.9343 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.271603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.842081 | 0 | 0.139433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | adri_js | 2019/01/07 | There is hope... When I was 17 years old my bf of 3 years died in a tragic car accident. I didn’t know how I could live without him. I attempted suicide, I hated life. I thought there was no hope for me.... I went into a deep depression. Well 4 months later my mother committed suicide, again I fell like life was pointl... | 1.079301 | 3.297853 | 2.751987 | 91.990821 | 83.213836 | 5.502183 | 20.044765 | 6.794906 | 0.274409 | 602 | 17 | 129 | 7 | 17 | 198 | 105 | 159 | 0.12 | 0.626 | 0.254 | 0.9701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 27 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 11 | 18 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 10 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 25 | 27 | 12 | 5 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 31 | 13 | 14 | 17 | 2 | 18 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 14 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 13 | 84 | 34 | 2 | 0.135711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120025 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116888 | 0 | 0.281693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127936 | 0 | 0.06862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.383427 | 0.132603 | 0 | 0.239671 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.367453 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142406 | 0.144528 | 0 | 0.103214 | 0.144406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108144 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096057 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.296892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102038 | 0 | 0.118617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107739 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12202 | 0.125805 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174787 |
suicidewatch | aLeXbOi9699 | 2019/01/07 | Can I talk to someone? I know it’s different from talking to someone professionally. I already have a therapist but I just feel like I’m psychotic in her eyes. I’d want to talk to someone who feels like the world and everyone around them has been wronging them, or someone who can give me advice through this. I’m just s... | 2.208541 | 4.288987 | 3.117868 | 91.649598 | 78.311927 | 6.272007 | 23.248825 | 7.3138 | 0.808029 | 1,696 | 55 | 361 | 22 | 41 | 538 | 203 | 436 | 0.193 | 0.689 | 0.117 | -0.9928 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 53 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 19 | 27 | 3 | 2 | 18 | 0 | 32 | 14 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 65 | 71 | 26 | 1 | 5 | 12 | 3 | 10 | 7 | 4 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 27 | 22 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 9 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 15 | 55 | 14 | 46 | 57 | 9 | 50 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 35 | 23 | 4 | 8 | 25 | 227 | 82 | 1 | 0 | 0.087601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060842 | 0.065818 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056851 | 0 | 0.04507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080718 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150992 | 0 | 0.075382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077246 | 0 | 0 | 0.064701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048833 | 0 | 0 | 0.070648 | 0 | 0 | 0.139399 | 0 | 0.336454 | 0.264096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057122 | 0.068352 | 0 | 0.14185 | 0.084038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073434 | 0 | 0 | 0.079149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121898 | 0.060267 | 0 | 0.078286 | 0 | 0.075604 | 0.156667 | 0.252846 | 0 | 0 | 0.06543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125714 | 0.133458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223527 | 0.078433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069383 | 0 | 0.070943 | 0 | 0 | 0.157477 | 0 | 0 | 0.078672 | 0 | 0.082096 | 0 | 0 | 0.051257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18942 | 0 | 0.117592 | 0.074022 | 0 | 0.058917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075893 | 0.12232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.313224 | 0.056919 | 0.073124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059045 | 0.061813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080873 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11118 | 0.178278 | 0.064622 | 0 | 0.084551 | 0.085844 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129336 | 0 | 0 | 0.070648 | 0 | 0.100394 | 0 | 0.072224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130826 | 0 | 0 | 0.090033 | 0 | 0 | 0.066715 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080179 | 0 | 0.075085 | 0 | 0 | 0.080836 | 0 | 0.095223 |
suicidewatch | WenchOLama | 2019/01/07 | Just numb I hate my relationship. I hate my job. I hate how stuck I feel. And worst of all I’m with someone who makes me feel so shitty and alone. I did something tonight that I haven’t done in year; I took a blade into the bathroom and went nuts on my legs. It was great to be rid of the self loathing feeling for that ... | 1.657887 | 3.445696 | 3.217669 | 91.679436 | 78.857143 | 5.944862 | 24.862155 | 6.836019 | 0.822952 | 783 | 29 | 172 | 8 | 19 | 258 | 129 | 210 | 0.195 | 0.726 | 0.079 | -0.9647 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 20 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 14 | 7 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 14 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 31 | 42 | 17 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 9 | 25 | 3 | 24 | 29 | 6 | 26 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 14 | 108 | 33 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114772 | 0.08092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0924 | 0 | 0 | 0.074635 | 0 | 0.099677 | 0 | 0.240216 | 0.120912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076438 | 0 | 0.097506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234063 | 0.082677 | 0.111118 | 0.25355 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120927 | 0 | 0.065771 | 0 | 0 | 0.127591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.457032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114843 | 0.102865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07725 | 0 | 0.116265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170148 | 0 | 0.089257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184441 | 0 | 0.12073 | 0 | 0.118794 | 0 | 0.130084 | 0 | 0 | 0.196113 | 0.089093 | 0 | 0 | 0.081913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093018 | 0.101152 | 0.106547 | 0 | 0 | 0.076885 | 0.074154 | 0 | 0.091876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128579 | 0 | 0 | 0.11305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09186 | 0.09283 | 0 | 0 | 0.107282 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149051 |
suicidewatch | LordXMonster | 2019/01/07 | Done with life I'm just so tired of it. Every night I just lay in bed thinking about how little people care about me. I just stay there hoping I don't fall asleep because when I sleep I dream about good stuff I want to happen and then my alarm just wakes me up back in this miserable world and I realize that all the stu... | 3.66539 | 4.63256 | 4.217713 | 89.921114 | 71.967742 | 7.184751 | 22.478006 | 7.348243 | 0.596355 | 594 | 13 | 129 | 6 | 11 | 188 | 92 | 155 | 0.132 | 0.752 | 0.116 | -0.6689 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 11 | 5 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 31 | 26 | 12 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 11 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 19 | 6 | 14 | 17 | 4 | 25 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 91 | 30 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129831 | 0 | 0 | 0.151692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225243 | 0 | 0.089283 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14933 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116939 | 0.162059 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096738 | 0 | 0.123402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113158 | 0 | 0.153043 | 0 | 0.083239 | 0.122847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.388552 | 0.155913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080493 | 0.119388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103452 | 0 | 0.146795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225924 | 0 | 0 | 0.274893 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148229 | 0.116713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.335332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093848 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168426 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094318 |
suicidewatch | SadAndDysphoric | 2019/01/07 | Goodbye! It is not going to get better. This is it for me! Goodbye :D | -3.227 | -3.307262 | 0.819167 | 95.86875 | 134.333333 | 1.5 | 17.083333 | 3.1291 | -0.916667 | 52 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 4 | 19 | 12 | 15 | 0 | 0.634 | 0.366 | 0.8185 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.753372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.445045 | 0 | 0.484113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | aliforer | 2019/01/07 | things will never get better I'm really really tired of hearing people say "it gets better". When? When is that supposed to happen. I've been hearing that literally my entire life. I'm almost in my mid 20s now. Maybe at...40? 50? When. I don't want to suffer just for the off-chance one day I won't want to die. I've act... | 1.576461 | 4.026426 | 3.895166 | 83.085223 | 83.162437 | 7.033595 | 22.660129 | 8.150884 | 1.646159 | 775 | 27 | 146 | 17 | 22 | 267 | 121 | 197 | 0.099 | 0.773 | 0.128 | 0.6519 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 32 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 11 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 19 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 19 | 36 | 9 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 19 | 7 | 18 | 26 | 0 | 22 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 88 | 29 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115461 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141942 | 0 | 0 | 0.13117 | 0 | 0.41187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100289 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257612 | 0 | 0 | 0.189802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082234 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234656 | 0 | 0 | 0.136354 | 0.092928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242141 | 0.101657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092585 | 0 | 0 | 0.18555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133141 | 0 | 0.077347 | 0.0746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133812 | 0 | 0.111248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074973 |
suicidewatch | dankathena | 2019/01/07 | Insomnia, up again. Thinking about killing myself for almost four years now. I think an ponder why haven’t I done it yet. Why haven’t I. This would be the perfect time. No job, no love life, I feel absolutely useless my city doesn’t have any good therapists and I just feel the constant depression and anxiety of being a... | 0.619111 | 2.81961 | 2.604444 | 92.42 | 85.074074 | 5.97037 | 20.851852 | 7.3011 | 0.624985 | 503 | 16 | 111 | 8 | 15 | 168 | 92 | 135 | 0.276 | 0.641 | 0.083 | -0.983 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 15 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 27 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 16 | 3 | 11 | 18 | 0 | 17 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 4 | 6 | 2 | 2 | 11 | 69 | 25 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.335684 | 0.173598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113984 | 0 | 0.128225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148457 | 0 | 0 | 0.110708 | 0 | 0.141223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154957 | 0.087572 | 0 | 0 | 0.140587 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166332 | 0 | 0.185441 | 0 | 0.092117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157295 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178504 | 0 | 0.127478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116203 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194613 | 0 | 0.214801 | 0 | 0 | 0.097737 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.453738 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119069 | 0 | 0 | 0.107938 |
suicidewatch | onionofanxiety | 2019/01/07 | When I have enough pills saved up I’ll die. I’m thinking around 6-9g of my Wellbutrin is good enough. I don’t know how the process will be. I wonder if it’s painful. I don’t want to go into detail as to why. The same shit over and over again. I’m tired of explaining. | -1.089742 | 0.756871 | 0.96267 | 103.681803 | 89.491803 | 4.141452 | 16.911007 | 5.288315 | -0.986004 | 207 | 5 | 55 | 1 | 7 | 68 | 47 | 61 | 0.213 | 0.674 | 0.112 | -0.8074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 14 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 10 | 12 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 32 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.557823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153408 | 0.226406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277081 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.310247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.292729 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway295601 | 2019/01/07 | hurting everyone i love, no redemption My life is in shambles i'm so close to dropping out of college due to failing grades while all my friends have great jobs and i have no hobbies and i'm fat and i don't have the time for anything because i work overnights full time at a job i despise so i can pay off my loans. i ge... | 1.520802 | 3.04015 | 3.136191 | 93.322326 | 78.393939 | 5.668925 | 24.273321 | 6.227272 | 0.490166 | 720 | 25 | 164 | 5 | 17 | 238 | 113 | 198 | 0.225 | 0.678 | 0.097 | -0.9745 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 11 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 13 | 6 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 26 | 26 | 17 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 33 | 6 | 22 | 21 | 5 | 27 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 11 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 112 | 38 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0.116907 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092118 | 0 | 0.146057 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.526376 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158253 | 0 | 0 | 0.34342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092557 | 0 | 0.12518 | 0 | 0.068085 | 0 | 0 | 0.132079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.384743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237765 | 0 | 0.13254 | 0 | 0.065839 | 0.097652 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084618 | 0 | 0 | 0.105785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216247 | 0 | 0.079967 | 0 | 0.120354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125709 | 0 | 0.081179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209568 | 0 | 0 | 0.114473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070661 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087215 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throaway314159265356 | 2019/01/07 | I am depressed (obviously). I do not see a future for myself, I get bad grades at school and have very few friends. I am 15 at school I am constantly bullied but I am not a nerd (my grades are literally the worst out of the whole class), i am also far from being a popular kid. I don't know what category I fall into. I ... | 4.36428 | 4.861868 | 5.52633 | 82.886808 | 70.061947 | 8.641512 | 28.683427 | 8.710501 | 1.988391 | 1,302 | 45 | 273 | 21 | 22 | 434 | 180 | 339 | 0.128 | 0.734 | 0.138 | 0.6651 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 41 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 22 | 1 | 1 | 20 | 0 | 30 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 55 | 56 | 26 | 0 | 6 | 16 | 9 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 17 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 10 | 12 | 52 | 13 | 34 | 42 | 10 | 40 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 22 | 19 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 191 | 59 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071385 | 0.074276 | 0.193437 | 0.216933 | 0.060703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083867 | 0.068639 | 0.149065 | 0.054415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093593 | 0.096464 | 0 | 0.071271 | 0 | 0 | 0.057569 | 0 | 0.076884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07521 | 0.085297 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09027 | 0 | 0.085708 | 0 | 0 | 0.075929 | 0 | 0 | 0.137932 | 0 | 0.139912 | 0.085631 | 0.152194 | 0.149742 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095024 | 0.079964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049058 | 0 | 0 | 0.094519 | 0 | 0.091279 | 0.06305 | 0.04361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07496 | 0.099865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087461 | 0.085652 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.396473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089289 | 0 | 0.057185 | 0.091779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076232 | 0 | 0.070987 | 0 | 0.361364 | 0.213398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084131 | 0 | 0.067116 | 0 | 0.078022 | 0.082183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057197 | 0 | 0 | 0.104102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24078 | 0.248249 | 0 | 0.099661 | 0.10265 | 0 | 0 | 0.064986 | 0 | 0 | 0.063411 | 0 | 0.216933 | 0 |
suicidewatch | kiana_keke | 2019/01/07 | A Not So Funny Joke//Looking For Advice The idea of this chat is genius. An Anonymous online forum where I can finally say the things I’ve been thinking for so long without feeling the societal repercussions and the drama that tags along with feeling this way.
My entire life has felt like one big mistake. Like someon... | 1.051477 | 3.035771 | 2.806905 | 92.901149 | 81.721519 | 5.637418 | 21.477511 | 6.761326 | 0.373951 | 1,755 | 54 | 390 | 19 | 47 | 581 | 216 | 474 | 0.112 | 0.677 | 0.211 | 0.995 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 51 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 31 | 32 | 6 | 1 | 18 | 0 | 42 | 10 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 88 | 83 | 42 | 1 | 11 | 27 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 22 | 21 | 2 | 0 | 19 | 6 | 1 | 7 | 21 | 10 | 5 | 5 | 8 | 9 | 39 | 22 | 41 | 62 | 11 | 37 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 14 | 14 | 4 | 12 | 20 | 246 | 61 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07875 | 0 | 0.059379 | 0 | 0 | 0.097058 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049898 | 0 | 0.11745 | 0.063528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059585 | 0.043502 | 0.078814 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072759 | 0 | 0 | 0.061472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074063 | 0.074559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069908 | 0 | 0 | 0.059614 | 0 | 0 | 0.147473 | 0 | 0.141403 | 0.064551 | 0 | 0.20457 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144332 | 0 | 0.068519 | 0.078174 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055134 | 0.065973 | 0.074568 | 0 | 0 | 0.179566 | 0 | 0.078677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095665 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161119 | 0 | 0 | 0.070816 | 0 | 0 | 0.074313 | 0.117657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151216 | 0.17432 | 0 | 0.063014 | 0.18946 | 0.119853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066969 | 0 | 0.068474 | 0 | 0 | 0.151997 | 0.193428 | 0.054274 | 0 | 0 | 0.07924 | 0 | 0 | 0.049474 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071382 | 0 | 0.045717 | 0.073372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1135 | 0 | 0 | 0.056867 | 0.064966 | 0.148893 | 0 | 0.146505 | 0 | 0.160429 | 0 | 0 | 0.060465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062374 | 0 | 0.081609 | 0 | 0.04741 | 0.182905 | 0 | 0.113308 | 0.083224 | 0 | 0 | 0.13638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069711 | 0 | 0 | 0.061634 | 0 | 0.117763 | 0.084183 | 0.113288 | 0 | 0 | 0.320817 | 0 | 0.064393 | 0 | 0 | 0.068791 | 0 | 0.207811 | 0 | 0 | 0.202775 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BeanTherDunDat | 2019/01/07 | Tired and almost done Hi. I'm not in imminent danger, but I'm having trouble seeing or even desiring life paths that don't end in suicide. I figured it might help me get a little clarity talking with some experienced people anonymously. I have a therapist, but talking to her about self harm is a no go. I have no intere... | 4.955034 | 5.361872 | 5.994876 | 80.368007 | 68.730135 | 8.931092 | 29.074356 | 8.909455 | 2.16019 | 2,612 | 88 | 526 | 43 | 42 | 870 | 290 | 667 | 0.145 | 0.696 | 0.159 | 0.8639 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 79 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 4 | 13 | 33 | 3 | 0 | 36 | 0 | 64 | 31 | 3 | 8 | 7 | 104 | 104 | 52 | 3 | 13 | 25 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 9 | 27 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 21 | 28 | 1 | 4 | 14 | 3 | 4 | 9 | 20 | 15 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 6 | 65 | 18 | 72 | 73 | 18 | 67 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 33 | 28 | 0 | 19 | 30 | 334 | 86 | 4 | 0.053343 | 0 | 0 | 0.058152 | 0 | 0 | 0.047286 | 0.057008 | 0.213663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044386 | 0 | 0 | 0.108826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041018 | 0 | 0.032518 | 0 | 0.045391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058237 | 0.059252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055929 | 0.057645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.034402 | 0 | 0.045945 | 0.054142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054589 | 0 | 0 | 0.123723 | 0 | 0.044562 | 0 | 0.094493 | 0 | 0 | 0.070466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100575 | 0 | 0.026972 | 0.038108 | 0 | 0 | 0.048755 | 0.045374 | 0 | 0.058488 | 0.082426 | 0 | 0.083609 | 0 | 0.121265 | 0.178967 | 0 | 0 | 0.058764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107265 | 0.05636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16703 | 0 | 0.142242 | 0.059016 | 0 | 0.087948 | 0 | 0 | 0.056483 | 0 | 0 | 0.301424 | 0.052122 | 0.106928 | 0.047103 | 0.047207 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048144 | 0 | 0.035607 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177757 | 0 | 0 | 0.113178 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039553 | 0.041142 | 0.103039 | 0 | 0 | 0.052265 | 0 | 0 | 0.055975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283805 | 0 | 0 | 0.057766 | 0 | 0.073963 | 0.046577 | 0 | 0 | 0.050427 | 0 | 0 | 0.217077 | 0 | 0 | 0.062356 | 0.053625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060716 | 0.034173 | 0.164537 | 0.05267 | 0.057271 | 0.060428 | 0 | 0 | 0.042421 | 0 | 0 | 0.042508 | 0 | 0.055649 | 0.060263 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041066 | 0.052758 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040108 | 0.085751 | 0 | 0 | 0.061003 | 0.061936 | 0.106317 | 0.03418 | 0 | 0.042349 | 0.06221 | 0.429172 | 0.050563 | 0 | 0 | 0.10865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092143 | 0 | 0.044014 | 0.031463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047962 | 0 | 0 | 0.059556 | 0 | 0.051421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227361 | 0 | 0 | 0.068703 |
suicidewatch | narwhaleicorn | 2019/01/07 | Hey guys, back to this again.. I've posted here before and was..sorta? kinda? doing better for a few months before this. I left my horrible treatment program (Ive been to another one before, this one just really didn't work) in November and was genuinely relieved, and making more efforts to take care of myself. I could... | 2.591094 | 4.452237 | 4.283114 | 84.763337 | 76.345455 | 6.910606 | 23.458333 | 7.793538 | 1.237852 | 1,068 | 33 | 209 | 16 | 24 | 359 | 154 | 275 | 0.159 | 0.706 | 0.135 | -0.88 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 13 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 15 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 45 | 42 | 19 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 11 | 10 | 26 | 9 | 34 | 29 | 11 | 34 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 15 | 0 | 3 | 17 | 136 | 35 | 7 | 0.093815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098373 | 0.071768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072138 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.319318 | 0 | 0 | 0.082972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104728 | 0.095796 | 0 | 0.095651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074904 | 0 | 0 | 0.060503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096936 | 0 | 0 | 0.084861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.426921 | 0.201064 | 0 | 0 | 0.085745 | 0.079799 | 0 | 0 | 0.072481 | 0 | 0.049014 | 0.089996 | 0 | 0 | 0.075032 | 0 | 0 | 0.092892 | 0 | 0 | 0.08404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202672 | 0 | 0.093097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20386 | 0 | 0 | 0.1375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078781 | 0.20991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062622 | 0 | 0.09425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072356 | 0 | 0.099773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127143 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101592 | 0 | 0.065039 | 0 | 0.098017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.300501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077605 | 0 | 0.093883 | 0.095633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105018 | 0.066403 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070537 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148957 | 0.054704 | 0.107826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127388 | 0.102044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081026 | 0 | 0 | 0.055334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | candycornday | 2019/01/07 | I've had so much hope, but I'm seeing that it's for nothing. Happiness is a delusion for me. I've tried again, over and over, but when youre fundamentally what's wrong, and have to live with yourself... you're stuck. And you have nothing left. Because people don't want something broken. It's idealistic to think anyone ... | 0.65472 | 2.803175 | 2.308144 | 94.949121 | 84.418719 | 4.873175 | 19.079489 | 6.112484 | -0.253087 | 753 | 20 | 172 | 6 | 22 | 246 | 102 | 203 | 0.185 | 0.662 | 0.153 | -0.2756 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 36 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 23 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 38 | 44 | 17 | 1 | 11 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 21 | 8 | 24 | 32 | 3 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 113 | 36 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125073 | 0 | 0 | 0.099886 | 0.10393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087336 | 0 | 0.102785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117351 | 0 | 0 | 0.304561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110452 | 0.132963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.372173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239697 | 0 | 0 | 0.133019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082981 | 0.160067 | 0 | 0 | 0.072832 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084802 | 0.13586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107877 | 0 | 0 | 0.368358 | 0.099143 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266184 | 0.409688 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ____Depressed____ | 2019/01/07 | All I hear is "It'll get better", but it still hasn't got better yet. I used to post here a lot, and all I would hear is: "It'll get better", but it still hasn't got better. I don't think it ever will. Thank you all, you gave me hope. Months ago (around August), I made a post here, and wrote a suicide note, and was pla... | 2.423902 | 3.501419 | 3.995441 | 89.910927 | 75.101083 | 7.153447 | 22.215747 | 7.623865 | 0.693986 | 1,015 | 25 | 230 | 13 | 21 | 339 | 127 | 277 | 0.207 | 0.651 | 0.142 | -0.9704 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 49 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 8 | 21 | 22 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 24 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 55 | 63 | 20 | 4 | 8 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 6 | 39 | 15 | 16 | 44 | 12 | 30 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 19 | 6 | 0 | 9 | 15 | 150 | 53 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089898 | 0.303048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077487 | 0 | 0.163709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066183 | 0 | 0.089511 | 0 | 0.194737 | 0 | 0.137025 | 0 | 0.094368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084575 | 0 | 0 | 0.193097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.340331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090705 | 0 | 0 | 0.302532 | 0 | 0 | 0.075642 | 0 | 0.071935 | 0.19167 | 0 | 0.072828 | 0 | 0.081056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058048 | 0 | 0.091152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118776 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080979 | 0 | 0.164083 | 0 | 0.092359 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085686 | 0 | 0.164634 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073156 | 0.081485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121266 | 0 | 0.136821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098064 | 0.281104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073985 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060853 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheCapedGamer | 2019/01/07 | I feel lost and broken For the past year and half, I’ve felt my life unraveling infront of me. I was in a serious committed relationship with my college girlfriend and we had just moved into together into our apartment. Everything was supposed to be great. Why is is that five months later we broke up, I caught her chea... | 2.425071 | 3.127286 | 3.692857 | 93.522143 | 74.642857 | 7.171429 | 21.857143 | 7.365786 | 0.3838 | 1,002 | 22 | 245 | 11 | 20 | 328 | 142 | 280 | 0.186 | 0.659 | 0.155 | -0.871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 27 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 20 | 21 | 5 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 18 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 64 | 51 | 25 | 1 | 6 | 12 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 23 | 0 | 3 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 7 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 12 | 55 | 9 | 27 | 34 | 5 | 41 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 30 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 24 | 166 | 65 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09034 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095751 | 0.078365 | 0 | 0 | 0.112556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.412245 | 0.218422 | 0.097853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05792 | 0 | 0 | 0.11236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108489 | 0 | 0.201237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090586 | 0.112752 | 0 | 0.112018 | 0 | 0.114963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143969 | 0.14937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.333753 | 0 | 0.183962 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081347 | 0.216636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108386 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106941 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097288 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065289 | 0 | 0 | 0.109417 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081046 | 0 | 0 | 0.081212 | 0 | 0.106318 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162777 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067707 | 0.065302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096602 | 0.292149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091961 | 0 | 0.117196 | 0.098241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072397 | 0 | 0 | 0.065629 |
suicidewatch | bpmixedthrowaway | 2019/01/07 | It feels different. I have bipolar disorder with mixed episodes and severe anxiety. I'm just so done feeling like this all the time. My husband will find someone who will love him as much as he deserves and my children will hopefully get a mom who doesn't yell all the time and try to escape from home as much as possibl... | 2.976935 | 4.542226 | 4.281484 | 86.452226 | 74.537634 | 7.433118 | 27.184946 | 8.131152 | 1.675162 | 1,438 | 55 | 300 | 23 | 30 | 474 | 187 | 372 | 0.064 | 0.813 | 0.123 | 0.9532 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 39 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 13 | 18 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 36 | 8 | 4 | 4 | 5 | 61 | 70 | 25 | 1 | 11 | 8 | 4 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 18 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 10 | 48 | 14 | 41 | 55 | 8 | 35 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 16 | 16 | 0 | 4 | 14 | 199 | 66 | 4 | 0.216636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090129 | 0 | 0 | 0.07366 | 0 | 0.082863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113169 | 0.124142 | 0 | 0 | 0.110847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.328613 | 0.077382 | 0 | 0 | 0.099001 | 0 | 0 | 0.118765 | 0.083686 | 0 | 0.113183 | 0 | 0.06156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072603 | 0 | 0.217304 | 0.107584 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238115 | 0.176587 | 0 | 0 | 0.117688 | 0 | 0 | 0.052919 | 0 | 0 | 0.095858 | 0.09096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195523 | 0 | 0.072303 | 0 | 0.10882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126861 | 0 | 0 | 0.159253 | 0.160633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115355 | 0.073399 | 0.082381 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113169 | 0 | 0 | 0.122112 | 0.103739 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122369 | 0 | 0.089602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091778 | 0.083389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122918 | 0.102089 | 0 | 0.081442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071962 | 0.138812 | 0 | 0 | 0.189483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.294163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089374 | 0.127778 | 0 | 0.173772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078857 | 0 | 0 | 0.076946 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Narcoticnurse | 2019/01/07 | Third time is the charm... except I have a dog. What to do? The first time, I took an overdose of propranolol, diazepam, and codeine. I went to ED because I got scared. They monitored my heart for ten hours and then sent me to psych for a week. I decided then that I would never go back to a psych ward.
The second time... | 3.156181 | 4.804576 | 4.34941 | 85.805546 | 74.238095 | 7.052989 | 27.996619 | 7.753152 | 1.664606 | 1,397 | 56 | 282 | 19 | 29 | 458 | 181 | 357 | 0.147 | 0.767 | 0.086 | -0.9833 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 45 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 14 | 13 | 0 | 3 | 24 | 1 | 37 | 10 | 4 | 2 | 5 | 39 | 62 | 18 | 4 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 11 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 14 | 5 | 46 | 6 | 47 | 44 | 5 | 41 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 17 | 15 | 0 | 4 | 19 | 201 | 59 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105643 | 0.074484 | 0 | 0.08766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08191 | 0 | 0.064936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094211 | 0 | 0.118324 | 0 | 0 | 0.217545 | 0 | 0.108608 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109031 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110067 | 0 | 0.070358 | 0.192713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215446 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090609 | 0.128809 | 0.116798 | 0.0823 | 0 | 0.166962 | 0 | 0.06054 | 0 | 0.170393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126231 | 0.0714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058543 | 0 | 0 | 0.112793 | 0.231476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081016 | 0.113349 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101689 | 0 | 0 | 0.111294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107086 | 0.119331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213297 | 0 | 0.084885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.349558 | 0 | 0.200794 | 0 | 0.080092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251321 | 0 | 0.085447 | 0 | 0 | 0.098748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075671 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | lemon-on-trees | 2019/01/07 | Am I selfish? Am I selfish for living? The amount of oxygen I take up could go to someone deserving. I am a burden to everyone I know. My own family cant deal with me. The *"love of my life"* looked me in the eyes and told me, "I can't deal with you. You're too much and I cant handle it."
I constantly pour out love t... | -1.178121 | 0.661434 | 1.970783 | 96.339643 | 89.867052 | 5.078497 | 15.586416 | 6.508806 | -0.48687 | 585 | 12 | 145 | 7 | 20 | 208 | 93 | 173 | 0.198 | 0.717 | 0.085 | -0.967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 26 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 16 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 18 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 25 | 37 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 25 | 6 | 25 | 31 | 5 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 9 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 101 | 33 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154566 | 0 | 0.114199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.442377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273345 | 0 | 0 | 0.134837 | 0 | 0.072321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137209 | 0.162576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158243 | 0 | 0.157213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101027 | 0 | 0 | 0.126299 | 0 | 0.12011 | 0 | 0.156136 | 0 | 0.258183 | 0 | 0.095475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096922 | 0 | 0.304391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136673 | 0 | 0.097109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Away_Yesterday | 2019/01/07 | Hanging 100%? My plan is to take a lot of xanax and then hang myself shortly after. my only issue is failing. | 0.220303 | 2.614907 | 2.824545 | 87.873485 | 91.727273 | 2.933333 | 20.969697 | 3.1291 | -0.109776 | 84 | 3 | 15 | 0 | 3 | 29 | 20 | 22 | 0.142 | 0.858 | 0 | -0.5106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.60708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.494489 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.442363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.43732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Revrendoni | 2019/01/07 | 8 months in 8 months i will be close enough to 40 and then i will make the the final decision to continue or end it. I've done a good job of isolating myself and others adapt rather quickly to me being gone and after a conversation with some one I'm close to it's very apparent I'm not worth much. | 2.338125 | 3.56964 | 4.336375 | 86.771125 | 75.5625 | 8.245 | 22.175 | 8.841846 | 1.284847 | 236 | 6 | 53 | 5 | 5 | 81 | 47 | 64 | 0.029 | 0.919 | 0.051 | 0.3036 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 8 | 3 | 3 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 36 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.316385 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27383 | 0.319452 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.338677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.3068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.493548 | 0 | 0.227273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | soapylobster | 2019/01/07 | Tonight is hard Tonight is becoming really hard for me, I’m laying in bed and I only see my self ending my life in the future (I’m 14) not because I don’t think I couldn’t get a job and have a family or anything it’s because of myself. I’m abusive to most people in my life and I also have abandonment issues but I just ... | 1.751858 | 3.404554 | 3.639477 | 89.377883 | 78.127273 | 6.183333 | 22.003788 | 6.996648 | 0.590361 | 1,019 | 29 | 218 | 11 | 24 | 344 | 142 | 275 | 0.17 | 0.672 | 0.158 | -0.4411 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 17 | 2 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 26 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 43 | 48 | 23 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 11 | 19 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 35 | 9 | 35 | 31 | 3 | 40 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 14 | 16 | 1 | 4 | 17 | 152 | 46 | 1 | 0 | 0.31708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167622 | 0.068593 | 0 | 0.217514 | 0.19704 | 0 | 0 | 0.093615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071223 | 0 | 0 | 0.05753 | 0 | 0.230497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078064 | 0.091288 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158018 | 0 | 0 | 0.058919 | 0 | 0.075159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075878 | 0 | 0 | 0.206759 | 0 | 0.186424 | 0 | 0.101395 | 0 | 0.142691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078884 | 0.189921 | 0.159821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088601 | 0.087849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093107 | 0.088522 | 0.07929 | 0 | 0 | 0.049025 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.315041 | 0.043581 | 0 | 0 | 0.078944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090072 | 0 | 0.071203 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135689 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071085 | 0 | 0.372242 | 0 | 0.091568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090933 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103574 | 0.059264 | 0.114318 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057445 |
suicidewatch | jahmon808 | 2019/01/07 | I wish I could Soul Swap I don’t want to live as a human on earth anymore. But I don’t want this body and life to go to waste. I wish I could just leave this body and let another soul take over. I think any other soul could live this life better than me.
I feel pathetic and that I make everything worse. I don’t belie... | 1.563715 | 3.406054 | 2.741418 | 94.726154 | 79.35461 | 5.473213 | 20.066012 | 6.297961 | -0.064963 | 1,052 | 26 | 237 | 8 | 26 | 337 | 147 | 282 | 0.178 | 0.647 | 0.176 | 0.3432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 33 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 27 | 2 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 17 | 13 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 43 | 44 | 21 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 23 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 32 | 11 | 28 | 33 | 5 | 14 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 13 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 9 | 141 | 55 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148809 | 0 | 0 | 0.182426 | 0.093765 | 0 | 0 | 0.088681 | 0.062525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149324 | 0.05451 | 0 | 0 | 0.100746 | 0 | 0.158169 | 0 | 0.297976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182339 | 0.091859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154035 | 0 | 0.092804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100585 | 0 | 0.092395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080365 | 0 | 0 | 0.100622 | 0.090427 | 0.063882 | 0.171714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069086 | 0.082667 | 0.046718 | 0 | 0.101639 | 0 | 0.071517 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095189 | 0 | 0.088284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191452 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094683 | 0 | 0.091438 | 0.37896 | 0.131058 | 0 | 0.157919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16141 | 0 | 0.059689 | 0.090658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085801 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068008 | 0.095149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096004 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07111 | 0 | 0 | 0.071256 | 0 | 0.093285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114593 | 0.087855 | 0.07099 | 0.052142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057584 |
suicidewatch | smolmeatbol | 2019/01/07 | Goodbye I just took all my antidepressants and a couple of acetaminophens and I hope it’s enough to end my life | 9.052273 | 7.175522 | 8.008182 | 76.832273 | 61.272727 | 10.618182 | 35.636364 | 8.841846 | 2.776127 | 91 | 3 | 18 | 1 | 1 | 28 | 19 | 22 | 0 | 0.854 | 0.146 | 0.4404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 13 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.459591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.367888 | 0.429181 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.412549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.461484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Sagadegeminis1 | 2019/01/07 | Why isn't euthanasia due to depression legal in the USA? I know that it is legal in Europe, why not here? If people don't want to live anymore they should have the right to die with painless and peaceful dignity. | 4.522143 | 5.745219 | 5.322381 | 81.839286 | 70.190476 | 8.457143 | 28.285714 | 8.841846 | 2.209371 | 169 | 6 | 32 | 3 | 3 | 55 | 34 | 42 | 0.172 | 0.605 | 0.223 | 0.1625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 21 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.336248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.292025 | 0 | 0.351882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.289548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.611883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | gul9uz | 2019/01/07 | Unknown trigger caused flashbacks and déjà vu of my suicide attempt - after months of recovery... Today, out of nowhere, I experienced a sudden sense of déjà vu; I was watching TV and I got the sense that I was suicidal again. I wasn't actually suicidal, but it felt like I had been transported back ten months to the ti... | 5.912906 | 7.242196 | 5.875837 | 78.761835 | 67.029557 | 8.361576 | 34.697044 | 8.63404 | 2.92743 | 866 | 41 | 154 | 13 | 14 | 272 | 115 | 203 | 0.18 | 0.735 | 0.085 | -0.9771 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 26 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 1 | 15 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 30 | 33 | 10 | 8 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 17 | 8 | 21 | 4 | 28 | 14 | 3 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 19 | 108 | 32 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0.106587 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112203 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087207 | 0 | 0 | 0.07044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106842 | 0 | 0 | 0.220908 | 0 | 0.104872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077148 | 0.053361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110285 | 0 | 0.261545 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.71684 | 0.123946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260135 | 0.127379 | 0 | 0.103532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | istherelifeafterlyme | 2019/01/07 | Cease to Exist (Idle No More) in 1969 the Carrion ceased to exist (Manson, Helter Skelter; **Little Girl, Cease To Exist**) giving rise to the Council which Is where my Story begins. On the Attack. The SOUL-EATING Violence of the Spiritual Messengers (Du Yu Follow, Little Girl?) gave Birth to the Great Hng Hng Which Be... | 3.469333 | 6.584231 | 2.723233 | 86.037556 | 93.285714 | 4.857895 | 23.454261 | 6.596605 | 1.057356 | 1,566 | 59 | 261 | 21 | 57 | 456 | 201 | 336 | 0.144 | 0.765 | 0.092 | -0.9838 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 105 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 25 | 0 | 14 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 24 | 12 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 13 | 16 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 17 | 3 | 40 | 18 | 3 | 33 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 21 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 128 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 0.31759 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140025 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070021 | 0.128567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.295521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109247 | 0 | 0 | 0.145616 | 0.137047 | 0 | 0 | 0.402978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.588467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151822 | 0 | 0 | 0.10658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146599 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | coldbuthot | 2019/01/07 | My mom has depression I'm 17f and sleeping at my mom's house tonight. I usually stay at my dad just because it's closer to school, but my grandma called me at 9pm and told me to get over to my mom's because my mom was all worked up over something and was putting all of her Bible's in her car as well as throwing things ... | 4.746545 | 4.785097 | 4.86197 | 89.592955 | 69.121212 | 7.812121 | 30.439394 | 7.168622 | 1.523376 | 628 | 23 | 139 | 5 | 10 | 196 | 89 | 165 | 0.104 | 0.816 | 0.08 | -0.7351 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 9 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 18 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 18 | 22 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 25 | 3 | 25 | 10 | 2 | 25 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 28 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 94 | 33 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150227 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125821 | 0 | 0 | 0.12658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.721567 | 0.098353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123364 | 0.124705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123309 | 0 | 0 | 0.189721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131336 | 0 | 0 | 0.141148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117742 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269116 | 0 | 0 | 0.087532 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | supacat70 | 2019/01/07 | This is so bullshit Just tried to hang myself with and hdmi cable. Apparently I was choking so loud I woke up everyone in my house. Now I gotta explain why. fuuuuuck me | 0.394412 | 2.848719 | 4.067882 | 78.009471 | 94 | 6.249412 | 24.447059 | 7.554174 | 1.853725 | 133 | 6 | 25 | 3 | 5 | 49 | 31 | 34 | 0.219 | 0.781 | 0 | -0.8345 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.509332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.615043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.361891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.480975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Mtndew71 | 2019/01/07 | Future plans I am planning on commiting suicide in the next few months. I am not sad all the time. I am on antidepresants, work full time, and see a therapist. Knowing my life will be coming to an end helps me enjoy taking walks, working, eating, my family and sex. I have a gun on layaway, paying a little bit a month t... | 2.878689 | 4.575741 | 4.171698 | 86.586264 | 75.094183 | 6.69699 | 24.221699 | 7.429499 | 1.047444 | 1,402 | 44 | 285 | 17 | 30 | 461 | 183 | 361 | 0.23 | 0.714 | 0.057 | -0.9975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 48 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 10 | 15 | 4 | 2 | 28 | 1 | 24 | 9 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 40 | 41 | 26 | 7 | 2 | 8 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 21 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 10 | 5 | 12 | 0 | 6 | 15 | 3 | 58 | 3 | 44 | 22 | 6 | 63 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 35 | 23 | 0 | 1 | 30 | 202 | 65 | 6 | 0 | 0.111233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106803 | 0 | 0.072188 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095717 | 0.096441 | 0 | 0.16174 | 0 | 0 | 0.105295 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194866 | 0 | 0.107595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096063 | 0 | 0 | 0.08315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265507 | 0 | 0.094938 | 0 | 0 | 0.102842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075085 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096348 | 0 | 0 | 0.111249 | 0.062926 | 0 | 0.09417 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103865 | 0 | 0.051594 | 0.076525 | 0 | 0.198812 | 0.306004 | 0 | 0.198932 | 0 | 0.094093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299738 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099843 | 0.088101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142801 | 0 | 0.110149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066449 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273712 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104305 | 0.063739 | 0 | 0.091708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055373 | 0 | 0.075305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104814 | 0 | 0.090497 | 0 | 0.205038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120912 |
suicidewatch | methmatical_ | 2019/01/07 | 2019 started awfully I’ve spent as long as I can imagine, just chasing something that apparently other people feel. Knowing that there is this beautiful feeling that is to be felt and it never experiencing it, sucks. It almost feels like everyone is lying to you for the sake of keeping on.
I remember my godmother tell... | 3.267503 | 4.681294 | 4.402292 | 86.492836 | 73.507042 | 7.135467 | 26.993598 | 7.686295 | 1.438823 | 550 | 20 | 114 | 7 | 11 | 180 | 87 | 142 | 0.023 | 0.771 | 0.206 | 0.9719 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 26 | 32 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 15 | 6 | 16 | 20 | 2 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 78 | 27 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143181 | 0 | 0 | 0.114347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126461 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283325 | 0 | 0 | 0.13663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.506091 | 0.30645 | 0.13729 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14158 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127094 | 0 | 0 | 0.235746 | 0.116554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209569 | 0 | 0 | 0.126539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154841 | 0 | 0.099129 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220157 | 0 | 0 | 0.101207 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117979 | 0.084338 | 0.226993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101574 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Katza15 | 2019/01/07 | I think I’ll live.... For now....
I’ll wait until I’m old enough to drink so I die of liver damage or OD | -3.133333 | -1.711725 | 0.876 | 103.624667 | 95 | 3.333333 | 8.333333 | 3.1291 | -2.359267 | 75 | 0 | 22 | 0 | 3 | 28 | 20 | 25 | 0.313 | 0.687 | 0 | -0.8478 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.44679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.421725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.44482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.380138 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.451736 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275846 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | LiquidSnake1993 | 2019/01/07 | I want to end this I broke up with my girlfriend last year over some dumb shit. I didn't treat her right and I feel like a failure and loser. I am 25 stuck at home, no future and now developed an addiction to porn. I want to prove myself wrong and achieve success but every time I think about how I lost/let her go, I ge... | -0.663623 | 1.412838 | 1.555525 | 98.357017 | 90.506849 | 4.614307 | 16.330289 | 6.139982 | -0.567384 | 518 | 12 | 124 | 5 | 18 | 173 | 89 | 146 | 0.282 | 0.567 | 0.152 | -0.9782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 17 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 32 | 25 | 12 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 26 | 6 | 17 | 20 | 3 | 18 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 7 | 3 | 3 | 8 | 82 | 33 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109444 | 0.160375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130689 | 0.095414 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130754 | 0 | 0.277264 | 0 | 0 | 0.103381 | 0 | 0.131876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158284 | 0.111819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163552 | 0 | 0.17791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157004 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08602 | 0.127586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160054 | 0 | 0.076469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.321335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100293 | 0 | 0 | 0.091269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129147 | 0.553924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171132 | 0 | 0.100795 |
suicidewatch | snoopysloth | 2019/01/07 | I brush by the idea of killing myself often. Honestly I don't even know where to begin in typing this. I just really need to talk to somebody about how i'm feeling. I try to tell people how I feel, but it's just too difficult to actually commit to reaching out for help. I feel ashamed about wanting to die. I feel ungra... | 2.712828 | 3.699317 | 4.502123 | 86.910525 | 74.268456 | 7.968517 | 26.968273 | 8.438072 | 1.687015 | 1,099 | 40 | 244 | 19 | 22 | 374 | 155 | 298 | 0.245 | 0.602 | 0.154 | -0.9899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 34 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 16 | 21 | 5 | 3 | 17 | 0 | 28 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 49 | 55 | 12 | 4 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 12 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 34 | 9 | 38 | 45 | 8 | 33 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 14 | 1 | 4 | 15 | 162 | 43 | 4 | 0.113087 | 0 | 0.110356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115474 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122207 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097402 | 0 | 0.117366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100161 | 0 | 0 | 0.224078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285901 | 0.080789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151599 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127661 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250228 | 0 | 0.124299 | 0.184362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23963 | 0.110497 | 0 | 0.099858 | 0 | 0.094964 | 0 | 0 | 0.096142 | 0 | 0 | 0.075486 | 0 | 0.113611 | 0 | 0 | 0.113923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251557 | 0 | 0.10922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107954 | 0.0784 | 0.098743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11505 | 0 | 0.108209 | 0 | 0.227367 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072446 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090116 | 0.10295 | 0 | 0 | 0.116082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090895 | 0.098843 | 0 | 0 | 0.131303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186617 | 0.133403 | 0.089763 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082329 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072824 |
suicidewatch | LandoKelEl | 2019/01/07 | Hi, folks I don't know the rules I just know I'm I'm unwell. I know I'm unwell, and have reached out to a few friends. It's a problem to them when I text them at 3am scared something will happen, but i'm not willing to address it in the light of day.
First step, yeah?
I guess so. And I'll admit it them but the few t... | 0.105402 | 2.178308 | 2.342222 | 94.3 | 86.164751 | 5.745594 | 21.260536 | 7.098364 | 0.501601 | 944 | 32 | 220 | 14 | 29 | 319 | 133 | 261 | 0.192 | 0.638 | 0.17 | -0.8882 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 11 | 19 | 3 | 1 | 13 | 2 | 26 | 12 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 43 | 50 | 15 | 1 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 13 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 25 | 11 | 28 | 38 | 7 | 19 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 7 | 2 | 6 | 11 | 134 | 38 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167813 | 0.148071 | 0 | 0 | 0.128167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146336 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123087 | 0.17498 | 0 | 0.335399 | 0.267557 | 0.075603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15941 | 0.143282 | 0.127963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128622 | 0 | 0.150689 | 0.318107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157224 | 0 | 0.10221 | 0.141392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160736 | 0 | 0 | 0.153511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106376 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135797 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15536 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168759 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | curiouscog | 2019/01/07 | Would people see this as suicide? I mean if you deliberately infected yourself with a potentially fatal disease say... tetanus, and let it get worse and not seek any medical treatment. Is it still considered as suicide? | 7.140991 | 9.769248 | 7.398378 | 63.986937 | 65.756757 | 10.338739 | 42.063063 | 10.504224 | 5.448485 | 176 | 11 | 25 | 5 | 3 | 57 | 33 | 37 | 0.39 | 0.61 | 0 | -0.9646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 5 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 17 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146621 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.286969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.305695 | 0 | 0.282711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223173 | 0 | 0 | 0.223631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.613941 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285992 | 0.199356 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | sigga-yr | 2019/01/07 | I didnt do enough, and now she may be gone I think my friend is dead, she said she had some pills that should be strong enough to kill her, i tried talking her out of it and telling her the stuff you tell a person whos so lost and so sad and upset, i tried comforting her and reminding her of all the people shed lose if... | 2.507194 | 3.50969 | 3.373313 | 94.744448 | 74.791045 | 6.792836 | 22.952239 | 7.087007 | 0.447271 | 1,226 | 32 | 292 | 12 | 25 | 390 | 167 | 335 | 0.16 | 0.747 | 0.092 | -0.9773 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 32 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 16 | 20 | 1 | 4 | 12 | 0 | 39 | 8 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 60 | 63 | 33 | 4 | 6 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 20 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 9 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 33 | 2 | 63 | 10 | 30 | 18 | 9 | 30 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 56 | 9 | 0 | 8 | 13 | 203 | 74 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103461 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065556 | 0 | 0.077152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287203 | 0 | 0 | 0.192625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074856 | 0 | 0.102986 | 0.060464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.387497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211001 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14487 | 0 | 0.048983 | 0 | 0.053283 | 0.078637 | 0.074985 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09312 | 0.18466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103726 | 0 | 0 | 0.076423 | 0.10576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066222 | 0 | 0 | 0.082788 | 0.08297 | 0 | 0.104888 | 0.102345 | 0 | 0 | 0.088713 | 0.062582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07231 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064998 | 0.24559 | 0 | 0 | 0.088629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060062 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072177 | 0 | 0.104951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078384 | 0 | 0 | 0.107327 | 0.102553 | 0 | 0.088363 | 0 | 0 | 0.075357 | 0.245838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062287 | 0.120149 | 0 | 0.074431 | 0 | 0.107758 | 0 | 0.179174 | 0.104165 | 0.254614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080974 | 0 | 0.077358 | 0.055299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | PsychdelicPerson | 2019/01/07 | Suicidal Feelings I feel like killing myself, have been since I was 11. I dont want to kill myself, I just want my life to end. Can you be suicidal without actually trying? Just the feeling of wanting to die or killing yourself | 1.504848 | 4.218503 | 3.092727 | 85.950758 | 89 | 5.660606 | 30.060606 | 7.168622 | 2.165679 | 180 | 10 | 33 | 3 | 6 | 59 | 34 | 44 | 0.397 | 0.476 | 0.127 | -0.9546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 12 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 8 | 1 | 5 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 23 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.282931 | 0.13325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.619073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131745 | 0.091125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.408047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.330044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TwiceForth | 2019/01/07 | In lack of ways to coping mechanisms I'll try not to make this a wall of text.
tl;dr I'm looking for coping mechanisms that don't rely on other people.
Basically I grew up with very abusive parents. My mother way neglectful and emotionally manipulative while my step dad was physically abusive. So for as long as I can... | 4.476075 | 6.186662 | 5.485349 | 78.741358 | 70.935484 | 8.091398 | 29.260753 | 8.680891 | 2.407269 | 1,920 | 76 | 343 | 34 | 36 | 632 | 236 | 465 | 0.141 | 0.685 | 0.174 | 0.9371 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 46 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 20 | 29 | 2 | 0 | 24 | 1 | 34 | 4 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 64 | 68 | 30 | 5 | 7 | 15 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 25 | 22 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 10 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 18 | 2 | 41 | 21 | 63 | 46 | 11 | 53 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 41 | 22 | 1 | 9 | 21 | 243 | 66 | 7 | 0 | 0.155361 | 0.063979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05243 | 0.054553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053952 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061598 | 0.050413 | 0 | 0.039966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067106 | 0.057374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109538 | 0.221246 | 0 | 0.067743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058923 | 0 | 0.061806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15196 | 0 | 0.034254 | 0 | 0.037261 | 0.054991 | 0.104872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131835 | 0 | 0 | 0.065118 | 0 | 0.07565 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068273 | 0.144125 | 0.053442 | 0 | 0 | 0.071234 | 0.067042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058021 | 0.055056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062037 | 0.043763 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072825 | 0 | 0 | 0.069551 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144588 | 0.145841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044427 | 0.099726 | 0 | 0 | 0.072799 | 0 | 0 | 0.227263 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042001 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074269 | 0.05599 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166652 | 0.252365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.358573 | 0.297597 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263483 | 0.057304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087113 | 0 | 0 | 0.104098 | 0.11469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089025 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078863 | 0 | 0 | 0.108192 | 0.03867 | 0.208161 | 0 | 0 | 0.058948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12666 |
suicidewatch | Infantry11b73 | 2019/01/07 | If you think about it, pursue help first plenty of free resources. To summarize my story up until I was 14 I was a pretty normal child.
At 14-15 an abusive step father came into my life, I practically felt as if I lost my mom in the process. The closest things I had to parents were my grandparents which I’ll explain l... | 4.01517 | 5.629874 | 4.922728 | 82.700856 | 71.944984 | 7.609547 | 27.330232 | 8.212053 | 1.848401 | 3,741 | 134 | 707 | 57 | 72 | 1,217 | 377 | 927 | 0.14 | 0.776 | 0.083 | -0.9965 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 75 | 13 | 13 | 6 | 8 | 39 | 26 | 5 | 1 | 58 | 1 | 86 | 12 | 3 | 10 | 2 | 123 | 155 | 63 | 7 | 17 | 17 | 14 | 6 | 2 | 2 | 7 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 37 | 55 | 0 | 4 | 19 | 1 | 5 | 21 | 14 | 13 | 1 | 8 | 63 | 13 | 122 | 15 | 108 | 76 | 10 | 129 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 1 | 76 | 45 | 1 | 14 | 62 | 511 | 159 | 10 | 0.050769 | 0.060153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1218 | 0.042244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094924 | 0 | 0 | 0.078076 | 0.04239 | 0.061897 | 0 | 0.043201 | 0.057199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056393 | 0 | 0.056675 | 0 | 0.058066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040535 | 0 | 0 | 0.130967 | 0 | 0.087455 | 0 | 0.05269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045923 | 0.08555 | 0.048512 | 0.136884 | 0 | 0.047861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146239 | 0 | 0 | 0.043184 | 0 | 0.111331 | 0.078448 | 0.046935 | 0.106099 | 0 | 0.144266 | 0.127748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050269 | 0.044895 | 0 | 0 | 0.050124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136118 | 0.107281 | 0.050925 | 0 | 0 | 0.234323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05299 | 0.100761 | 0.045126 | 0.056168 | 0 | 0.055803 | 0.082767 | 0 | 0 | 0.165482 | 0 | 0.143439 | 0.049606 | 0 | 0.13449 | 0.044929 | 0.042633 | 0.056798 | 0.110841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135555 | 0.051472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102289 | 0.051163 | 0 | 0 | 0.11892 | 0.081047 | 0 | 0 | 0.150578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095287 | 0.049743 | 0.194857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240817 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056373 | 0 | 0 | 0.070394 | 0.132989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103301 | 0 | 0 | 0.118693 | 0.102074 | 0.113746 | 0.053999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102762 | 0.080913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114133 | 0 | 0 | 0.043016 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251542 | 0 | 0.040544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058118 | 0.111066 | 0.057612 | 0 | 0 | 0.038172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.033729 | 0.065061 | 0 | 0 | 0.148019 | 0 | 0.096246 | 0.048512 | 0 | 0.034469 | 0.055222 | 0 | 0 | 0.061069 | 0.087696 | 0 | 0 | 0.05989 | 0.120894 | 0 | 0 | 0.045647 | 0.047063 | 0.183245 | 0.113364 | 0 | 0 | 0.055057 | 0.073921 | 0 | 0 | 0.144259 | 0 | 0 | 0.098081 |
suicidewatch | Spicy-Froggo | 2019/01/07 | Being suicidal has perks One day during math class I was practicing tying a noose on my shoelace. There were three people in a row at each table and I was in the middle. At the time I was in grade 7 and the rest of the class was grade 8, because I’m good at math. The two kids sitting at my table were popular and they s... | 3.818434 | 3.574848 | 5.337815 | 86.359494 | 71.088353 | 8.567711 | 27.041767 | 8.238736 | 1.495179 | 896 | 26 | 205 | 12 | 15 | 305 | 118 | 249 | 0.038 | 0.843 | 0.119 | 0.9632 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 21 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 20 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 26 | 29 | 22 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 14 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 20 | 2 | 28 | 11 | 38 | 8 | 4 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 20 | 19 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 145 | 39 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175588 | 0 | 0.135578 | 0.141067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.41339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187588 | 0 | 0.109337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.392949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14992 | 0 | 0.151871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135322 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17282 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188361 | 0 | 0 | 0.165612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139885 | 0 | 0 | 0.135991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | NotThatCuteTransGirl | 2019/01/07 | I'm probably too young to be suicidal but here it goes anyway I'm 16, and I'm sure so many of you would tell me I have my whole life ahead of me and all that bullshit but I'm not really sure where to go from here. I'm mtf getting nowhere medically and my parents are holding hormones over my head on the basis that I hav... | 6.644807 | 4.650595 | 7.724633 | 77.338514 | 66.027027 | 10.889575 | 34.656371 | 9.606745 | 2.982315 | 550 | 20 | 118 | 9 | 7 | 189 | 89 | 148 | 0.104 | 0.757 | 0.139 | 0.8144 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 10 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 18 | 25 | 11 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 5 | 22 | 20 | 2 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 76 | 18 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.314873 | 0 | 0.085628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16039 | 0.13497 | 0 | 0.15463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151133 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106422 | 0.073609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151783 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176461 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11459 | 0 | 0 | 0.3346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169856 | 0 | 0.153284 | 0.162446 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164807 | 0 | 0.42601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177737 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109689 | 0 | 0 | 0.107031 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | seduce_my_anus | 2019/01/07 | told my doc to go fuck himself he wouldn't even look me in the eye when i described my depression to him. just wrote a prescription after i filled out a questionaire, a "quiz" to see what kid of depression i've got.
so i told him to fuck off.
and that was 14 months ago, i'm not any better. life still fucking sucks.... | -1.309048 | 0.688932 | 1.00827 | 99.054786 | 100.587302 | 4.742222 | 16.61746 | 6.508806 | -0.237275 | 454 | 13 | 109 | 7 | 20 | 151 | 84 | 126 | 0.222 | 0.7 | 0.078 | -0.963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 14 | 6 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 10 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 24 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 17 | 6 | 14 | 17 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 13 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 14 | 64 | 21 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.291014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130522 | 0.468544 | 0 | 0 | 0.192024 | 0.141698 | 0.135116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172752 | 0.119327 | 0.16507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141866 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158538 | 0 | 0.162102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117121 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173413 | 0 | 0 | 0.169061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.26983 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197019 | 0 | 0 | 0.322857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
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