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suicidewatch | LAborWavee | 2019/02/21 | I have been under constant pain for the past week. I have had anxiety for a long time now and I think it is safe to say that I have it under control. Recently I have been thinking about the mistakes I have made as a teenager and I have been stressing out about it for almost two weeks. I'm in an uncontrollable amount of... | 1.749656 | 3.239723 | 3.464406 | 91.343373 | 77.674699 | 6.429604 | 23.302926 | 7.168622 | 0.689562 | 608 | 19 | 138 | 7 | 14 | 203 | 90 | 166 | 0.26 | 0.706 | 0.034 | -0.9836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 23 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 30 | 38 | 11 | 2 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 1 | 19 | 1 | 24 | 28 | 2 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 103 | 31 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145886 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136879 | 0.112025 | 0.121644 | 0.08881 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157437 | 0.163402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14909 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160133 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102904 | 0 | 0 | 0.128646 | 0.12893 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275708 | 0.097248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139076 | 0.202004 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14385 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.326172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121802 | 0.166886 | 0 | 0 | 0.318719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096789 | 0.186702 | 0 | 0.11566 | 0.084952 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257792 | 0 | 0.233725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147954 | 0.148469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | SeaWaThrow | 2019/02/21 | My life may have reached a tipping point of what I can endure I’m a law student and my life before the past 24 hours was already extremely stressful. My workload from class is roughly the peak of what I can sanely handle, and that’s not factoring in the stress I’m experiencing for not one but two job searches - one for... | 6.169312 | 5.439435 | 7.037508 | 77.780289 | 66.281879 | 9.866107 | 32.383389 | 9.188382 | 2.624637 | 1,157 | 41 | 234 | 18 | 16 | 388 | 164 | 298 | 0.14 | 0.788 | 0.072 | -0.9749 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 10 | 13 | 1 | 7 | 20 | 0 | 28 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 30 | 42 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 11 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 10 | 0 | 7 | 10 | 6 | 35 | 3 | 37 | 29 | 4 | 33 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 10 | 0 | 4 | 21 | 173 | 52 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103538 | 0.110319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067983 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101925 | 0 | 0.105754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195864 | 0 | 0.102293 | 0 | 0.112452 | 0.354172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050547 | 0.071418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09845 | 0 | 0.107019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.353056 | 0.04884 | 0 | 0.088275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106318 | 0.187629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106464 | 0.338709 | 0.076031 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095432 | 0 | 0.087289 | 0 | 0 | 0.094503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10733 | 0 | 0 | 0.095094 | 0 | 0.100087 | 0 | 0.159325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.458058 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082485 | 0 | 0.079351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096367 | 0 | 0.072779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128754 |
suicidewatch | adventuretimelover | 2019/02/21 | Not suicidal, but uncomfortable I just feel like out of control? I mean I have a history of suicidal ideation and attempts, but not it's like every moment is unbearable and I just want to end it all. And I know I won't do it tonight but I feel unstable and like I'm going insane just from how intolerable life is. Is tha... | 1.190417 | 3.532814 | 3.817222 | 83.725 | 83.861111 | 8.044444 | 25.666667 | 8.841846 | 2.3073 | 277 | 12 | 58 | 8 | 8 | 97 | 46 | 72 | 0.142 | 0.598 | 0.26 | 0.8336 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 23 | 14 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 3 | 5 | 13 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 41 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293336 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231644 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264482 | 0.186842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148637 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184731 | 0.383321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28489 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.572157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | lefthandruler | 2019/02/21 | What counts as an attempt? Does it count as a attempt if you start out intending to die but give up before completion? I tried to slit my wrists once, but the blade I was using was a little blunt and I couldn't find the willpower to slash hard enough. I also tried to hang myself twice, but the first time I pulled mysel... | 4.022232 | 4.136939 | 4.557143 | 90.887857 | 70.696429 | 7.114286 | 23.142857 | 6.182691 | 0.3277 | 415 | 8 | 94 | 2 | 7 | 132 | 74 | 112 | 0.14 | 0.839 | 0.021 | -0.9187 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 18 | 12 | 13 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 13 | 0 | 14 | 9 | 2 | 15 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 62 | 17 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187795 | 0 | 0 | 0.185207 | 0.158348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165382 | 0.153914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173581 | 0.102836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.385406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.288383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.316535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.368554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BonglordFourTwenny | 2019/02/21 | It’s aight I’ll stick around for a little while longer, give the world things I have to offer and see what else is on, if it doesn’t work out I can just sleep for a while later on. I’m happy with that, I don’t care too much :) | 0.739808 | 1.485063 | 2.187692 | 102.532308 | 78.807692 | 5.2 | 13 | 3.1291 | -1.719862 | 173 | 0 | 48 | 0 | 4 | 56 | 42 | 52 | 0 | 0.802 | 0.198 | 0.872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 8 | 9 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 31 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.301187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.344952 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.282633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.324559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.360161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.339098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269607 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.338576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | fuckassjack | 2019/02/21 | I wanted to get some of this off my chest. I can't talk to anybody about it so why not tell reddit. I feel like shit. I've felt like shit for about a year now. During summer of 2018 I tried to kill myself. A lot happened that day. I was running from the cops for no good reason. I fell into a dirty fountain (not import... | 1.292431 | 2.905723 | 2.739471 | 95.493659 | 79.341297 | 5.190286 | 20.484248 | 5.634305 | -0.210853 | 1,063 | 27 | 246 | 5 | 26 | 346 | 133 | 293 | 0.191 | 0.665 | 0.144 | -0.9683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 45 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 19 | 21 | 3 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 21 | 5 | 5 | 4 | 1 | 48 | 59 | 8 | 2 | 10 | 13 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 34 | 11 | 35 | 49 | 6 | 28 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 11 | 2 | 5 | 13 | 160 | 58 | 0 | 0.090755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196665 | 0.220554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102527 | 0 | 0.063458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069785 | 0.075776 | 0.055323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09253 | 0.09323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058529 | 0 | 0.078167 | 0 | 0.094189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101215 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085555 | 0 | 0.137665 | 0.12967 | 0.087139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070117 | 0 | 0.284493 | 0 | 0.051578 | 0.228362 | 0 | 0.100057 | 0 | 0 | 0.160508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097155 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100407 | 0 | 0.349135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185605 | 0 | 0.177352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077156 | 0 | 0 | 0.060579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13343 | 0.067293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05814 | 0.093311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077504 | 0 | 0 | 0.090861 | 0 | 0 | 0.08262 | 0 | 0 | 0.186317 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14589 | 0.079324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120587 | 0.058152 | 0 | 0.072049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.321177 | 0.072037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220554 | 0.058443 |
suicidewatch | throwaway9107910791 | 2019/02/21 | How do you keep your head afloat? I don't even know how to type this all out. It all feels very surreal.
I work too hard, my therapist says I'm going to die by 35 if I keep it up. I'm trying to make changes in my life but I don't know if I can keep afloat until then. I constantly feel like I'm drowning with these h... | 1.532761 | 3.351443 | 2.925034 | 93.485839 | 79.357143 | 6.600454 | 25.174603 | 7.594959 | 1.081592 | 729 | 28 | 168 | 11 | 18 | 237 | 105 | 196 | 0.105 | 0.823 | 0.072 | -0.757 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 38 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 12 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 11 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 31 | 35 | 14 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 20 | 4 | 24 | 29 | 8 | 23 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 13 | 2 | 4 | 12 | 98 | 30 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.520046 | 0.38881 | 0 | 0 | 0.061196 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075158 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084624 | 0 | 0.083873 | 0.086446 | 0 | 0.063869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068899 | 0 | 0.083022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163725 | 0 | 0.078364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089983 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202239 | 0.171445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073954 | 0.083588 | 0 | 0.045463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07166 | 0 | 0.082098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213309 | 0 | 0 | 0.087926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0818 | 0.056503 | 0.117244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068009 | 0 | 0 | 0.053397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151242 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063615 | 0 | 0 | 0.063745 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09288 | 0 | 0.051257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066004 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174712 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.38881 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throw__me__away1 | 2019/02/21 | I own nothing I honestly can’t handle anything anymore and my entire life situation is horrible. My own father sleeps in my bed because “his room is too loud” and he says if I want my room to myself then we have to move. Multiple times he’s told me “I OWN this room, this house.” While legally that is true I just want m... | 3.301155 | 4.798102 | 4.300401 | 86.923497 | 73.563953 | 7.07304 | 25.822136 | 7.662119 | 1.246531 | 1,341 | 45 | 280 | 17 | 27 | 435 | 187 | 344 | 0.059 | 0.866 | 0.075 | 0.3313 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 29 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 7 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 19 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 36 | 39 | 22 | 1 | 8 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 12 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 9 | 60 | 9 | 40 | 26 | 10 | 48 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 37 | 19 | 0 | 2 | 22 | 186 | 72 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109652 | 0.099469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093369 | 0 | 0 | 0.076308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111284 | 0.078461 | 0 | 0.184681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086284 | 0 | 0.205209 | 0 | 0.095484 | 0 | 0 | 0.198484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058626 | 0 | 0.127545 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129477 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118816 | 0 | 0 | 0.079258 | 0.054821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262842 | 0.089566 | 0.119263 | 0.082488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119338 | 0 | 0 | 0.10767 | 0 | 0.117747 | 0.239003 | 0 | 0.085342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112242 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12613 | 0.112293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079424 | 0 | 0.089612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168738 | 0 | 0.098078 | 0.103309 | 0 | 0 | 0.223645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065431 | 0 | 0 | 0.214446 | 0 | 0.152368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104021 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079712 | 0 | 0 | 0.072261 |
suicidewatch | JoeTheRapper | 2019/02/21 | The fuck is the point I have nothing to gain from what I'm doing in life, passed up so many useful opportunities and let my easy preventable illness affect so bad to the point that it's completely ruined any chance at redeeming my life. I have no way out of this endless cycle of the same miserable day repeating over an... | 9.110657 | 6.302804 | 8.930141 | 73.190798 | 61.957746 | 12.283568 | 36.342723 | 10.504224 | 3.463616 | 282 | 9 | 57 | 5 | 3 | 92 | 53 | 71 | 0.245 | 0.613 | 0.142 | -0.8766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 12 | 8 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 39 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17796 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274379 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267598 | 0.369682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.494767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226018 | 0 | 0 | 0.154353 | 0.207719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Lola17lala | 2019/02/21 | I’m 17. I became deaf in my right ear when I was 13, now it’s happening to my left ear. I can’t keep up with conversations anymore and people just ignore me when I say I can’t hear. I don’t know what to do. Everyone I care about gets too frustrated with my hearing to talk to me. I feel so lonely. Things only seem to ge... | 0.107984 | 1.740173 | 2.863444 | 93.107534 | 83.109589 | 6.363209 | 18.64775 | 7.44753 | 0.217698 | 253 | 6 | 62 | 4 | 7 | 89 | 51 | 73 | 0.134 | 0.819 | 0.047 | -0.7133 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 16 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 13 | 1 | 10 | 15 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 38 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.534362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210707 | 0 | 0 | 0.13028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202446 | 0 | 0.188517 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 3iffel65 | 2019/02/21 | I don't see the point in living Here's all I get:
> see a therapist and you'll get better
Why? I don't want to get better, because that means living.
If I want something (death), I'm not going out of my way NOT to do it. That just seems a lot of wasted time to me.
No one has never given me a valid reaso... | 0.624948 | 1.894404 | 3.08101 | 93.837683 | 80.219512 | 5.173519 | 17.811847 | 5.288315 | -0.561371 | 282 | 5 | 67 | 1 | 7 | 98 | 58 | 82 | 0.1 | 0.792 | 0.107 | 0.3728 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 16 | 19 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 2 | 8 | 17 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 40 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.330798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293122 | 0 | 0.106285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.330274 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158993 | 0 | 0 | 0.124834 | 0 | 0 | 0.203714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126726 | 0.142233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.384564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298053 | 0.170251 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217138 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220612 | 0.148443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | -Sil3nt | 2019/02/21 | I feel useless I have thought about doing this post for a while but never actually did it because I couId'nt translate my emotions into words, I will try to do it this time around.
I am a 19 year old boy from Portugal, currently in college. I am an extremely shy and awkward person and I have lately been feeling reall... | 4.169165 | 4.943889 | 5.305357 | 83.297164 | 70.646489 | 7.933898 | 29.277845 | 8.076483 | 1.925704 | 1,598 | 60 | 320 | 21 | 28 | 530 | 207 | 413 | 0.151 | 0.702 | 0.147 | 0.2579 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 29 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 16 | 23 | 2 | 3 | 18 | 0 | 46 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 8 | 64 | 68 | 26 | 2 | 6 | 14 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 5 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 15 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 18 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 11 | 54 | 11 | 56 | 42 | 7 | 47 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 17 | 18 | 0 | 5 | 23 | 236 | 69 | 7 | 0.160791 | 0 | 0.078454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056214 | 0 | 0 | 0.071569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098017 | 0.08879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106201 | 0.072722 | 0.067737 | 0.076821 | 0 | 0 | 0.07579 | 0 | 0.162601 | 0.114869 | 0.077192 | 0 | 0.07348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248453 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091381 | 0.067432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084942 | 0.080643 | 0 | 0 | 0.092766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09069 | 0.170254 | 0.08735 | 0 | 0 | 0.078554 | 0 | 0 | 0.071147 | 0.135024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076072 | 0.107329 | 0 | 0.080768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0591 | 0 | 0.372036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171093 | 0 | 0.08927 | 0.174121 | 0 | 0 | 0.070198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15451 | 0.24798 | 0 | 0 | 0.091072 | 0 | 0.076475 | 0 | 0 | 0.081365 | 0.064065 | 0 | 0.08387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08794 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103028 | 0.078988 | 0.12765 | 0.093759 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069436 | 0 | 0.132669 | 0 | 0.127628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072544 | 0 | 0 | 0.154997 | 0 | 0.117058 | 0 | 0 | 0.228443 | 0 | 0 | 0.155316 |
suicidewatch | ZiggyandNico | 2019/02/21 | I just found out my little brother is suicidal I don't know what to do, he's 16 and depression runs in my family, I have severe chronic depression too. He also goes to the same school I used to which my sister's psychiatrist once said that every psych in our city calls our old school The Depression Factory because the... | 4.963818 | 5.126508 | 5.738485 | 83.065909 | 68.666667 | 8.989899 | 28.585859 | 8.841846 | 1.994556 | 696 | 22 | 145 | 11 | 11 | 228 | 105 | 180 | 0.138 | 0.794 | 0.068 | -0.8932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 11 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 35 | 29 | 12 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 27 | 1 | 17 | 21 | 4 | 17 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 25 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 92 | 36 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13255 | 0.148467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142589 | 0 | 0 | 0.447218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085738 | 0 | 0.10937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.284658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087008 | 0 | 0.130209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11538 | 0 | 0 | 0.285359 | 0.105812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132739 | 0 | 0 | 0.130103 | 0.114624 | 0 | 0 | 0.145223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121817 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136213 | 0.138243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123478 | 0 | 0 | 0.262748 | 0.206882 | 0 | 0 | 0.146647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112113 | 0 | 0 | 0.076565 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | sugarydash | 2019/02/21 | My Debt Won... Gonna Do It Tonight I just can’t deal. I can’t find a job that fits what I need. I found a good job but it’s 45 mins away driving and I can’t afford a car. I can’t afford my rent. My bills. I’ve applied to so many damn jobs. I’m done I’m tired of over it. I’m tired of being in debt borrowing from people.... | -2.454505 | -0.874439 | 0.662619 | 100.38206 | 107.77551 | 3.894192 | 12.456567 | 5.873415 | -1.060425 | 504 | 10 | 126 | 6 | 26 | 175 | 91 | 147 | 0.182 | 0.719 | 0.099 | -0.9188 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 22 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 13 | 3 | 11 | 15 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 58 | 20 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109282 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132992 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142847 | 0 | 0 | 0.171364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149928 | 0.088823 | 0.131089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.620376 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115887 | 0 | 0 | 0.166217 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108352 | 0 | 0 | 0.17156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166234 | 0 | 0 | 0.100124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091134 | 0.359265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | thAtgirl-zzz | 2019/02/21 | I’m so close. I don’t know why I’m posting this, I guess in some sense what I’m about to do isn’t right, but I have no idea how to carry on like I am.
Things have been so hard. I’ve lost most of my family, I’m failing at being a parent, everyone I hoped for is falling away. I know this sounds stupid, and pathetic - s... | 2.292479 | 2.96176 | 4.148992 | 90.251891 | 74.92437 | 7.280672 | 23.243697 | 7.510576 | 0.743573 | 845 | 22 | 199 | 10 | 17 | 288 | 120 | 238 | 0.194 | 0.666 | 0.141 | -0.9442 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 9 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 23 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 36 | 45 | 15 | 0 | 3 | 10 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 30 | 6 | 31 | 40 | 7 | 26 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 17 | 0 | 10 | 3 | 137 | 42 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.302635 | 0.213374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145796 | 0 | 0 | 0.143838 | 0 | 0.077149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151545 | 0 | 0 | 0.326678 | 0.172243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215542 | 0.074542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133226 | 0 | 0.167486 | 0.144236 | 0 | 0.146128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243171 | 0.277804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202733 | 0.097766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089995 | 0.12111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098256 |
suicidewatch | XManeEX | 2019/02/21 | I don't know what else there is i should wait for. So I'm going to be 23 in a few days, I've been lost in life for a long time, I don't know who I am, I don't know who I want to be, everyone else seems like they know what they're doing and I'm just drifting and never getting anywhere.
I've already come to terms with ... | 4.059918 | 3.467007 | 5.130708 | 89.241828 | 70.59292 | 8.546767 | 25.791695 | 7.882392 | 1.071221 | 806 | 19 | 195 | 9 | 13 | 267 | 121 | 226 | 0.095 | 0.819 | 0.086 | -0.4071 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 21 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 14 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 20 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 41 | 49 | 9 | 1 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 11 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 25 | 6 | 29 | 41 | 5 | 23 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 12 | 12 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 118 | 38 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.305333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09546 | 0.069694 | 0 | 0 | 0.12881 | 0 | 0.101115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117448 | 0.120945 | 0.098485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075514 | 0 | 0 | 0.32774 | 0 | 0 | 0.10778 | 0 | 0.115617 | 0.163354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088331 | 0 | 0.059732 | 0 | 0.064976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129064 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.439828 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080754 | 0.167567 | 0 | 0 | 0.101178 | 0 | 0 | 0.249608 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088178 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073242 | 0.11755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090919 | 0 | 0 | 0.182212 | 0.104081 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088016 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075955 | 0.146515 | 0 | 0 | 0.066666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077622 | 0 | 0 | 0.119021 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067435 | 0.090749 | 0 | 0.139223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11021 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Saturn-Sheep | 2019/02/21 | Everyday I've been doing what I need to take care of myself. Going through the motions, and for the most part okay. Still, everyday I think about wanting to die. Sometimes it's just a fleeting moment, or a knee jerk reaction to feeling overwhelmed. Other times, I really just can't figure out why I want to live.
I sta... | 4.163537 | 5.39566 | 5.617149 | 79.354887 | 71.054381 | 8.296123 | 27.084718 | 8.721564 | 2.000211 | 1,314 | 44 | 253 | 23 | 24 | 444 | 171 | 331 | 0.113 | 0.706 | 0.181 | 0.9604 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 45 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 22 | 19 | 3 | 1 | 22 | 1 | 30 | 6 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 66 | 68 | 19 | 2 | 12 | 15 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 11 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 13 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 36 | 14 | 38 | 56 | 6 | 29 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 17 | 181 | 47 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083586 | 0.10318 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103814 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097653 | 0 | 0.062422 | 0.085489 | 0.079628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089095 | 0 | 0.191147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161135 | 0 | 0 | 0.104197 | 0 | 0 | 0.083574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109051 | 0 | 0.106689 | 0.102086 | 0 | 0 | 0.084004 | 0 | 0 | 0.05194 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096642 | 0.133509 | 0.046172 | 0 | 0.333813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085298 | 0 | 0.189257 | 0 | 0.094947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100448 | 0 | 0.140155 | 0.072891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102344 | 0 | 0.065521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060545 | 0.097171 | 0 | 0.101467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186944 | 0 | 0.133788 | 0 | 0.15095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071059 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108079 | 0 | 0 | 0.181673 | 0 | 0 | 0.110218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.390208 | 0 | 0.07581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067137 | 0 | 0 | 0.121722 |
suicidewatch | I-AM-SO-NORMAL | 2019/02/21 | Fucking sick of the guilt. Why do I feel so fucking guilty finally doing the one thing that will make me happy?
I go out of my way to make everyone else happy.
I just want this one thing.
Why do I feel so goddamn guilty about it?
I just want to find my peace my way. | 0.176842 | 2.128423 | 1.985175 | 97.750395 | 84.789474 | 5.203509 | 18.27193 | 6.427356 | -0.280986 | 204 | 5 | 49 | 2 | 6 | 67 | 35 | 57 | 0.232 | 0.581 | 0.187 | -0.6471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 2 | 6 | 12 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 32 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200273 | 0 | 0 | 0.216946 | 0.181008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.366175 | 0 | 0 | 0.112552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.421641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233622 | 0.314395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.357406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Synyzy | 2019/02/21 | Suicde Prevention Hotlines. UK [116 123](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=http://www.samaritans.org/&ved=2ahUKEwiAg671qsvgAhWnxYUKHYPVB5EQ0kMoATAAegQIDRAE&usg=AOvVaw00mEtZI6-mRBBfXgUtOyC0)
France - [01 46 21 46 46](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url... | 37.873126 | 47.159219 | 15.855 | -12.771605 | 58.096045 | 15.209416 | 54.125235 | 9.225671 | 11.467112 | 4,334 | 180 | 165 | 123 | 108 | 905 | 132 | 354 | 0.05 | 0.95 | 0 | -0.5514 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.999939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.006312 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.009095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Spvcehead | 2019/02/21 | Every time I try to do anything good, I get knocked down. Told it's not good enough, or it doesn't make up for this, or that. I'm so tired of trying, and caring. I feel useless. I still hate myself. | -0.699767 | 1.269923 | 1.210512 | 101.701349 | 89 | 3.44 | 15.576744 | 3.1291 | -1.345917 | 150 | 3 | 37 | 0 | 5 | 49 | 36 | 43 | 0.208 | 0.609 | 0.183 | -0.3052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 5 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 23 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279435 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143191 | 0 | 0 | 0.459757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159814 | 0.315005 | 0 | 0.261887 | 0 | 0.372154 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | augustrose_ | 2019/02/21 | will this kill me ? Overall it's about 12000 mg of medicine. Mostly sleeping pills (trazodone) but mixed with a good amount of antidepressants(cymbalta) antianxiety(hydroxozine) and a mix of high (800mg) and low (200mg) dose ibuprofen and antiinflamatories. Its about 80 pills or something.
I know you can't te... | 2.617097 | 5.232638 | 3.51657 | 86.414855 | 80.075269 | 5.44043 | 22.203226 | 6.742158 | 0.408025 | 383 | 12 | 79 | 4 | 10 | 122 | 64 | 93 | 0.208 | 0.724 | 0.068 | -0.9508 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 16 | 13 | 7 | 2 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 1 | 15 | 10 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 47 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229379 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21722 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.573045 | 0 | 0.284657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259167 | 0 | 0 | 0.199375 | 0 | 0 | 0.183307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.305506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183972 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | mrsbobbelcher | 2019/02/21 | I'm hopeless I've been struggling with bpd for over two years and I'm tired of it. I feel like I'm at my lowest point, I'm going to therapy and taking medication yet I still feel like hurting myself. I feel like I have nothing and no one. No one at work likes me, I'm the youngest there and people just think I'm some i... | 2.009048 | 2.788305 | 3.586667 | 93.598435 | 75.723164 | 6.12412 | 22.654933 | 5.873415 | 0.130701 | 625 | 16 | 150 | 3 | 13 | 208 | 97 | 177 | 0.259 | 0.667 | 0.074 | -0.985 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 11 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 15 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 25 | 35 | 10 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 24 | 5 | 19 | 33 | 2 | 17 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 12 | 96 | 30 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081664 | 0 | 0 | 0.135665 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18216 | 0.257372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084821 | 0.234675 | 0 | 0.10604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112694 | 0 | 0.115227 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.325498 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083254 | 0.104856 | 0 | 0 | 0.113522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092449 | 0 | 0 | 0.084999 | 0 | 0.095902 | 0.100399 | 0 | 0.125542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090291 | 0.096522 | 0 | 0 | 0.137331 | 0 | 0 | 0.076947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.552092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077332 |
suicidewatch | cmacgames | 2019/02/21 | This past 6 months I've been feeling worse than ever, probably due to lack of self confidence and anxiety about growing up I don't want to hurt myself, I just want to stop being here. I have thought about it a lot but I can't bring myself to do it because of my family. Even though I wouldn't be with them anymore the th... | 3.14605 | 4.157943 | 4.475837 | 87.413827 | 73.251012 | 8.241925 | 25.867971 | 8.680891 | 1.585995 | 929 | 30 | 207 | 17 | 18 | 308 | 126 | 247 | 0.181 | 0.685 | 0.134 | -0.8707 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 18 | 14 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 19 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 49 | 42 | 19 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 14 | 1 | 4 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 32 | 7 | 38 | 33 | 4 | 24 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 136 | 42 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079531 | 0 | 0.103103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089543 | 0 | 0 | 0.108619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101844 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274665 | 0.09404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196013 | 0 | 0.262833 | 0.074271 | 0 | 0 | 0.19004 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092407 | 0.115019 | 0.108261 | 0.057135 | 0.084743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176771 | 0.09383 | 0 | 0.208188 | 0.105402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099244 | 0.072075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105767 | 0.112089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082675 | 0 | 0.210432 | 0 | 0 | 0.108456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173835 | 0 | 0 | 0.119012 | 0 | 0.117976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167122 | 0.090868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204286 | 0.165069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08578 | 0.18396 | 0.082521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105579 | 0.211894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066949 |
suicidewatch | aminoacid4 | 2019/02/21 | Im insecure and ugly I have ugly disproportionate features. Features that are not attractive by objective standards for a guy. Even tho i take great care of myself that's like going from a 3 to a solid 4/10. I honestly look disgusting to look at. I'm not tryna self pity but this is just what i feel every time im in the... | 1.404537 | 3.578828 | 3.364882 | 88.338128 | 81.598425 | 6.112417 | 20.792853 | 7.32111 | 0.679911 | 484 | 14 | 100 | 7 | 13 | 163 | 87 | 127 | 0.16 | 0.639 | 0.201 | 0.5917 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 11 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 22 | 15 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 7 | 17 | 14 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 66 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184398 | 0.218411 | 0 | 0.139306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093966 | 0 | 0 | 0.182288 | 0 | 0.327425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.535786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161553 | 0 | 0 | 0.146321 | 0.277688 | 0 | 0 | 0.140566 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189275 | 0.180855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105943 | 0 | 0 | 0.096411 | 0.190034 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Dededededemon | 2019/02/21 | I thought I was getting better. It had been a while now since the last time this happened. Before this, it would be small bouts of sadness and suicidal thoughts. Nothing that stuck to my mind for too long, probably around 2-3 days at a time. But it's been over a month now, and it only gets worse as nights go by.
Ther... | 2.554774 | 4.499946 | 2.806469 | 94.929593 | 76.722772 | 6.073047 | 23.10341 | 6.937598 | 0.49195 | 394 | 12 | 87 | 4 | 9 | 120 | 75 | 101 | 0.121 | 0.78 | 0.1 | -0.6197 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 11 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 20 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 4 | 7 | 1 | 11 | 9 | 1 | 20 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 56 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165466 | 0 | 0 | 0.171978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213598 | 0.125406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203188 | 0 | 0.110512 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171955 | 0 | 0.174192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172085 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206284 | 0.196343 | 0 | 0.155211 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.364963 | 0 | 0.186583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.308749 | 0.226775 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198165 | 0.138134 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | jambajou | 2019/02/21 | Dampened by meds and doctors dont care Ive had severe psychosis 4 times in my 30 yo life. And been hospitalized three times.
First two times I had the energy to do something about the following depression but this time I feel like I'm done.
I go to work part-time and have a couple of friends but I feel like the depre... | 2.497806 | 4.686396 | 3.454709 | 89.055059 | 77.860759 | 6.998143 | 21.292827 | 8.021204 | 0.959021 | 626 | 17 | 129 | 11 | 15 | 200 | 109 | 158 | 0.153 | 0.713 | 0.134 | -0.6501 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 6 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 15 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 28 | 31 | 11 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 3 | 17 | 6 | 19 | 22 | 1 | 25 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 75 | 21 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115245 | 0 | 0 | 0.12163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143242 | 0 | 0.083489 | 0 | 0.223003 | 0 | 0.134357 | 0 | 0 | 0.132505 | 0 | 0.13248 | 0.303447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122041 | 0 | 0.196373 | 0.277454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110117 | 0 | 0.141944 | 0.100019 | 0 | 0.135273 | 0 | 0.147148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09144 | 0.189739 | 0 | 0.114313 | 0.114566 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14019 | 0 | 0.08975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082934 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109689 | 0.199326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.301951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087893 | 0 | 0.126461 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094247 | 0 | 0 | 0.091963 | 0 | 0 | 0.166733 |
suicidewatch | BdsMIA | 2018/12/25 | It is Christmas and I am alone Christmas Day is here and I am all alone. I tried to cultivate some holiday spirit, but now that the sun is leaving the sky I am feeling horrible. I have no family to speak of, my wife left me, and I lost a job 7 months ago.
My savings will carry me a few more months and then I will be o... | 2.838199 | 4.744064 | 4.286304 | 84.814674 | 75.770186 | 7.581366 | 27.649068 | 8.418075 | 1.964508 | 633 | 26 | 129 | 12 | 14 | 210 | 102 | 161 | 0.237 | 0.698 | 0.065 | -0.9882 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 18 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 20 | 25 | 12 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 19 | 1 | 17 | 20 | 6 | 17 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 94 | 25 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154382 | 0 | 0 | 0.360753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112318 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154253 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164182 | 0 | 0.08806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.345652 | 0.154801 | 0.192681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18441 | 0.189225 | 0 | 0.123014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116253 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.278025 | 0.185104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118015 | 0 | 0.185318 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147565 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111594 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | dogfish1100 | 2018/12/25 | It's like there is a gloss box around me. It should be easy. The answers to all my problems are sitting right there staring at me in the face. All I have to do is walk down stair and celebrate Christmas with my family. They want me there but I can't do it. There are so many things I can't do, not because I am physicall... | 2.241014 | 3.850435 | 3.865937 | 88.476168 | 76.624521 | 6.891048 | 24.890456 | 7.686295 | 1.180018 | 983 | 34 | 212 | 14 | 22 | 328 | 123 | 261 | 0.107 | 0.756 | 0.137 | 0.6691 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 9 | 1 | 3 | 13 | 0 | 40 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 36 | 49 | 14 | 2 | 8 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 34 | 4 | 33 | 36 | 6 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 163 | 47 | 4 | 0.146592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130498 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11272 | 0 | 0.268084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096823 | 0 | 0.247021 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138194 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153177 | 0 | 0.083312 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15605 | 0 | 0.144729 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130298 | 0 | 0 | 0.080563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.41417 | 0.143235 | 0.146924 | 0.129444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140269 | 0 | 0.147366 | 0 | 0 | 0.146632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157385 | 0 | 0.250378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134962 | 0 | 0 | 0.097389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104135 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Left_for_dead | 2018/12/25 | It's Christmas and this is hard for me to type right now I've been crazy suicidal in the past, from ages 13 to 18, thought I was going to die at 18, or rather I planned it. Landed myself in a psych ward and that was the lowest point of my life. Thankfully through healing inner wounds and facing my demons every single d... | 2.167214 | 3.994436 | 3.224097 | 92.034361 | 77.472906 | 6.481554 | 23.100438 | 7.38713 | 0.77493 | 774 | 24 | 169 | 10 | 18 | 248 | 114 | 203 | 0.197 | 0.72 | 0.083 | -0.9721 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 17 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 33 | 32 | 15 | 4 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 4 | 19 | 4 | 27 | 22 | 2 | 28 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 12 | 1 | 3 | 16 | 111 | 31 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112426 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073309 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096017 | 0 | 0 | 0.077557 | 0 | 0.103579 | 0 | 0.12481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.422828 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101323 | 0 | 0.108081 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060806 | 0 | 0.115467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111177 | 0 | 0 | 0.068346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128018 | 0.215457 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084942 | 0.058752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114801 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.308101 | 0 | 0 | 0.1204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099479 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20379 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.394631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193319 | 0 | 0.110718 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103865 | 0 | 0 | 0.283727 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077443 |
suicidewatch | ogrecklessinred | 2018/12/25 | I think I’m almost ready. I have a plan. I’ve actually had the same plan for months, but for the longest time I had a huge problem with my plan. I didn’t want my roommates or fiancé to find me. I couldn’t figure out any way where I would be capable of killing myself, but also in a situation where the ones I love most w... | 3.781937 | 4.157576 | 5.204185 | 85.115465 | 71.307692 | 8.275632 | 26.60624 | 8.296473 | 1.512262 | 629 | 19 | 138 | 9 | 11 | 212 | 103 | 169 | 0.166 | 0.699 | 0.135 | -0.8658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 30 | 22 | 8 | 3 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 18 | 4 | 19 | 13 | 4 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 89 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160955 | 0 | 0 | 0.128542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162547 | 0.114831 | 0.154333 | 0 | 0.146911 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177832 | 0.167383 | 0 | 0.131022 | 0 | 0.170198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153804 | 0 | 0.161586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.384261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280983 | 0 | 0 | 0.186629 | 0 | 0.102994 | 0 | 0 | 0.187455 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094807 | 0.255172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114183 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | crybvbe | 2018/12/25 | a warm bath i think the only reason i haven’t done it yet is because these animals will die in this house without me. if the dogs weren’t such gremlins with their food, i could make it work.
the tub is very deep. it’s easy to sink into myself there. this is not my home and i don’t want the ceramic to stain. is it wors... | 2.51201 | 4.240004 | 3.410483 | 91.519783 | 76.185185 | 6.177134 | 23.590982 | 6.895973 | 0.67719 | 1,036 | 32 | 220 | 10 | 23 | 330 | 149 | 270 | 0.144 | 0.767 | 0.09 | -0.9598 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 11 | 1 | 2 | 17 | 0 | 34 | 7 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 40 | 47 | 12 | 1 | 8 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 18 | 10 | 3 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 12 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 26 | 3 | 30 | 28 | 2 | 30 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 149 | 44 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154326 | 0 | 0 | 0.098239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067271 | 0 | 0.187808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113365 | 0 | 0.190122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092187 | 0 | 0 | 0.228052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201725 | 0 | 0.133442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22139 | 0 | 0 | 0.127335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060648 | 0 | 0 | 0.11685 | 0 | 0.112845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097661 | 0 | 0.123459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220988 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129246 | 0 | 0.11729 | 0 | 0 | 0.085113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117524 | 0.149559 | 0.08393 | 0.234851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118981 | 0 | 0 | 0.110937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.374014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070711 | 0 | 0 | 0.128698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273163 | 0.195271 | 0.087595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106378 | 0 | 0.08034 | 0 | 0.112461 | 0.078393 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | LovingCrimson | 2018/12/25 | (26m) Wrote my suicide notes, practiced my suicide method. Almost ready to go. I’ve written notes to my mom and dad, wrote out a list of passwords and my will. I’ve practiced tying a bungy cord belt around my neck and found just the right way to do it for no pain. I’m pretty much ready to go. The brain damage I’ve accu... | 2.270837 | 3.648402 | 3.905419 | 89.19931 | 76.011494 | 6.580624 | 25.07225 | 7.168622 | 0.95277 | 646 | 22 | 142 | 7 | 14 | 216 | 103 | 174 | 0.139 | 0.751 | 0.109 | -0.7525 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 20 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 15 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 18 | 29 | 7 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 16 | 4 | 25 | 20 | 2 | 18 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 86 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118614 | 0.128314 | 0 | 0 | 0.135423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.321813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151127 | 0 | 0 | 0.115083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.324273 | 0.127664 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135881 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158041 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.32767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101809 | 0 | 0 | 0.254554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.337627 | 0 | 0 | 0.211917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146641 | 0.155406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123094 | 0 | 0.114625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.315329 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165752 | 0.138945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | KhaniusMaximus | 2018/12/25 | Will I respawn? I want to die but my question is will I respawn? | -1.445 | 0.55192 | -0.217143 | 109.087143 | 96.857143 | 2.8 | 28.428571 | 3.1291 | 0.038257 | 49 | 3 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 10 | 14 | 0.217 | 0.694 | 0.089 | -0.3939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.633972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.684298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.360299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | abraabraka | 2018/12/25 | Hello Hello everyone. Can I take my frontin after drinking beers? Thank you. | 2.837436 | 4.961432 | 4.253846 | 72.282821 | 111.307692 | 4.810256 | 27.410256 | 6.427356 | 2.570303 | 61 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 20 | 12 | 13 | 0 | 0.815 | 0.185 | 0.3612 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.540438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.527156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.414796 | 0 | 0 | 0.507915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | dramatic_victor | 2018/12/25 | (not) giving up? 18 year old male
2 weeks ago i had a breakdown. I took a week of school and tried to take care of myself. I even got the balls to talk to my boss, who is a wonderful man, about what the fuck is going on in my head. How i'm relapsing into sh, how im hella suicidal and i made a promise to kill myself i... | 0.897682 | 2.484925 | 2.97235 | 93.492935 | 80.428571 | 6.388221 | 20.48183 | 7.333567 | 0.364524 | 948 | 25 | 226 | 13 | 24 | 321 | 126 | 266 | 0.26 | 0.646 | 0.093 | -0.9953 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 23 | 11 | 4 | 13 | 0 | 20 | 8 | 5 | 7 | 3 | 42 | 47 | 18 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 15 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 33 | 8 | 41 | 32 | 4 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 16 | 6 | 3 | 16 | 145 | 41 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0.084493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076751 | 0 | 0 | 0.089674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066577 | 0 | 0.158341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06913 | 0 | 0 | 0.111678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16009 | 0 | 0.083059 | 0.049207 | 0 | 0.069249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085483 | 0.088859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093525 | 0 | 0 | 0.153918 | 0.191583 | 0 | 0 | 0.070577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061156 | 0 | 0 | 0.382273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081927 | 0.057795 | 0 | 0.086985 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063649 | 0 | 0 | 0.083623 | 0.092082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090855 | 0 | 0 | 0.065851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.34674 | 0.087627 | 0 | 0.078822 | 0 | 0 | 0.355506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.378832 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0651 | 0.208777 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096197 | 0.058784 | 0 | 0 | 0.090136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102138 | 0 | 0.138904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111514 |
suicidewatch | farisalsaid | 2018/12/25 | I want to kill myself, here’s why I’m not depressed or anything but I keep thinking about how my life could be different, how I could have changed myself for the better, the point is I’m not happy with who I am and I’m a coward but moreover I’m curious what comes after death and for the past year my interest in what co... | 0.641429 | 2.380828 | 2.693095 | 94.456071 | 81.857143 | 5.390476 | 19.428571 | 6.322622 | -0.091007 | 600 | 15 | 139 | 5 | 16 | 202 | 91 | 168 | 0.2 | 0.659 | 0.141 | -0.9426 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 10 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 11 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 42 | 33 | 16 | 5 | 6 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 18 | 7 | 18 | 28 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 88 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133889 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172116 | 0.280304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140134 | 0 | 0 | 0.169987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085004 | 0 | 0.092466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109055 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144616 | 0.360008 | 0 | 0.178832 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153805 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167283 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137856 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.306687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104774 |
suicidewatch | lucash_licata | 2018/12/25 | 2018 has been the worst year of my life and I don’t want to see 2019 I’ve been battling depression for over a year now and this year has been the worst year of my life. I was hospitalized back in February because I wanted to kill myself and I wish I did I spent this year looking for reasons to live which every time I t... | 3.450726 | 3.675926 | 4.538871 | 90.128306 | 71.983871 | 7.812903 | 24.370968 | 7.645422 | 0.825713 | 451 | 11 | 107 | 5 | 8 | 148 | 74 | 124 | 0.231 | 0.729 | 0.04 | -0.982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 17 | 23 | 6 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 20 | 0 | 16 | 12 | 2 | 16 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 75 | 27 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155718 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1227 | 0 | 0.097273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174961 | 0 | 0.14752 | 0.083369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184123 | 0.170824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.353082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.338128 | 0 | 0 | 0.140904 | 0 | 0.133999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126681 | 0.093047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188238 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183498 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226709 | 0 | 0 | 0.513791 |
suicidewatch | Your_friendly_medic | 2018/12/25 | I wish i could go to sleep to never wake up again. I'm only 20 years old and I'm already pretty tired. It's like everyday i go through the same shit and a painful feeling of loneliness as well as the depression. I have heavy social anxiety and I'm shy af, also no friends, no gf, and my future seems even darker. I cry m... | 1.4822 | 3.16097 | 3.390627 | 90.741474 | 79 | 6.469087 | 23.10341 | 7.38713 | 0.813039 | 371 | 12 | 83 | 5 | 9 | 125 | 65 | 101 | 0.298 | 0.542 | 0.16 | -0.9552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 16 | 9 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 3 | 10 | 14 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 49 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150584 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170285 | 0.123402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246408 | 0 | 0.169502 | 0 | 0 | 0.132907 | 0 | 0.160149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10192 | 0 | 0.130013 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170721 | 0 | 0.084805 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119013 | 0 | 0 | 0.14481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161922 | 0 | 0 | 0.11736 | 0.164197 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145873 | 0 | 0 | 0.156989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140478 | 0 | 0 | 0.158397 | 0 | 0 | 0.463265 | 0.1573 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.354898 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099371 |
suicidewatch | glassshardslaughter | 2018/12/25 | christmas morning 2018 was nearly when i died it must have been 5-6am in the morning and i just broke a glass against my wall and just uncontrollably started cutting my arms. once i was bleeding enough i was just holding up a massive glass shard to my throat daring myself to do it. i pretty much collapsed in exhaustion... | 3.682132 | 4.537655 | 4.681395 | 87.028527 | 71.829457 | 7.283721 | 25.573643 | 7.38713 | 1.093122 | 983 | 29 | 208 | 10 | 18 | 321 | 143 | 258 | 0.129 | 0.785 | 0.087 | -0.8766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 25 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 40 | 40 | 14 | 3 | 3 | 12 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 12 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 2 | 33 | 4 | 36 | 23 | 12 | 40 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 152 | 45 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145334 | 0 | 0 | 0.14083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.342755 | 0.133287 | 0 | 0.0852 | 0.116684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065224 | 0.092154 | 0 | 0.141308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139337 | 0.134638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212678 | 0 | 0 | 0.136588 | 0 | 0 | 0.182227 | 0.126041 | 0 | 0.113905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.302156 | 0 | 0 | 0.094826 | 0.095648 | 0.099489 | 0 | 0.137188 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137376 | 0.174821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139689 | 0.123141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131235 | 0 | 0.123431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145728 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2822 | 0.146382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082655 | 0.126737 | 0 | 0.075218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwawayuglyperson | 2018/12/25 | What do I have to think about to make my death the less trouble possible to my family? I am 20 and inexperienced about stuff like writing my will and stuff like that, what do I have to think about? | 6.82125 | 5.504255 | 6.96 | 80.785 | 65.25 | 11 | 30 | 10.125757 | 2.356 | 155 | 4 | 35 | 3 | 2 | 50 | 24 | 40 | 0.149 | 0.739 | 0.112 | -0.3954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 7 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 28 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.291704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.302345 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.348837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.70845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.396542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway15373819727 | 2018/12/25 | How do I open up to a friend? Hey everyone!
I’m an 18 year old guy who has been dealing with depression and suicidal thoughts for several years now, and have finally decided I want to do something about it. A lot of people have said you need to ‘open up’ to people about it, and that this is the first step in getting b... | 2.825091 | 5.363451 | 3.885452 | 84.541968 | 78.657534 | 7.454977 | 28.226484 | 8.447377 | 2.275838 | 601 | 27 | 116 | 13 | 15 | 194 | 91 | 146 | 0.107 | 0.715 | 0.178 | 0.8733 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 29 | 28 | 7 | 2 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 13 | 7 | 20 | 22 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 82 | 27 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164766 | 0 | 0 | 0.15352 | 0.128256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075293 | 0 | 0 | 0.163124 | 0 | 0.126663 | 0 | 0 | 0.46019 | 0 | 0.077799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142487 | 0 | 0 | 0.166813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.325767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260308 | 0.137096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105781 | 0 | 0 | 0.191786 |
suicidewatch | geekgoddess_1 | 2018/12/25 | The Reality is that I despise living And the only thing keeping me alive is my dog because she deserves to live out her life with the person she loves most in a familiar home with her familiar routine.
If it weren't for her, id absolutely jump in front of a car, hang myself, cut my wrists and bleed ti death in the sho... | 2.187112 | 4.376969 | 4.059128 | 84.324515 | 78.899666 | 6.532165 | 25.026064 | 7.629822 | 1.461699 | 1,172 | 44 | 225 | 18 | 29 | 396 | 161 | 299 | 0.197 | 0.742 | 0.061 | -0.9867 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 31 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 25 | 16 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 23 | 15 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 40 | 49 | 26 | 3 | 5 | 12 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 23 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 10 | 21 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 34 | 4 | 30 | 43 | 3 | 24 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 10 | 13 | 10 | 11 | 10 | 8 | 163 | 57 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088871 | 0.091918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074103 | 0.054101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07644 | 0 | 0.092109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117237 | 0 | 0.074776 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083666 | 0 | 0.08975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.656385 | 0.046368 | 0 | 0.050439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078482 | 0 | 0 | 0.087622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095009 | 0 | 0.287596 | 0 | 0.088071 | 0.078885 | 0.098189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062687 | 0 | 0 | 0.313472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160201 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188774 | 0 | 0.086956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060139 | 0.134997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077493 | 0 | 0 | 0.083898 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056856 | 0.1825 | 0 | 0.095285 | 0 | 0.075792 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058962 | 0.056868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102058 | 0.085552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057152 |
suicidewatch | lazred | 2018/12/25 | Retirement Regretting I wish I had gone back to work army breast cancer treatments ended last January. I’m healthy enough but grew somewhat anxious about my work and thought retirement was the best idea. It’s not. I hate it. I tried to go back to work recently and failed. I’m on ante depressants and have no social cont... | 3.052421 | 5.718227 | 3.765526 | 84.986184 | 78.684211 | 7.589474 | 29.5 | 8.548687 | 2.5934 | 398 | 19 | 74 | 9 | 10 | 126 | 65 | 95 | 0.281 | 0.518 | 0.201 | -0.9102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 13 | 6 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 12 | 9 | 3 | 13 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 41 | 11 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1641 | 0 | 0.197737 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16875 | 0.196865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216562 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21079 | 0 | 0 | 0.155305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198761 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153138 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151257 | 0 | 0.218983 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129355 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219096 | 0 | 0 | 0.416117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | pixihawk | 2018/12/25 | I'm sorry I'm sorry for being so selfish
I'm sorry that I can't reach out because Im ashamed of talking to my friends about this because I don't want to burden them
I know how terrible it is to have someone threaten suicide to you, it messed me up so badly and I'm sorry for burdening everyone here and not going quietl... | 3.226364 | 3.99775 | 5.08337 | 84.038628 | 72.821656 | 7.237753 | 27.648523 | 7.348243 | 1.507196 | 584 | 21 | 119 | 6 | 11 | 201 | 84 | 157 | 0.24 | 0.623 | 0.136 | -0.7597 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 13 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 21 | 30 | 11 | 2 | 5 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 17 | 3 | 27 | 28 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 79 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148545 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216632 | 0.076368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091193 | 0.133158 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2252 | 0 | 0 | 0.113352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168765 | 0 | 0 | 0.104773 | 0.124143 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092541 | 0 | 0 | 0.73357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087786 | 0 | 0 | 0.124901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074152 | 0.118799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.322101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070333 |
suicidewatch | bobagopa | 2018/12/25 | People are nice from a distance But when you want to do something with them they distance themselves and you realize how big of a loser you really are. | 3.217816 | 5.874368 | 4.048966 | 83.25092 | 77.965517 | 6.625287 | 26.908046 | 7.793538 | 1.944025 | 122 | 5 | 21 | 2 | 3 | 39 | 24 | 29 | 0.108 | 0.762 | 0.13 | -0.0772 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.51226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.473358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.568841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.435822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | MALCOLMxTUCKER | 2018/12/25 | Going out with nembutal I'm planning on going before year end, and I've settled on nembutal to avoid added distress to anyone (I'm not sure why I care ha).
I have roughly $6k in savings, and from what I've seen nembutal runs about $600-$1k for a lethal dose. Does anyone have experience with this? Right now my plan is... | 7.405789 | 6.780306 | 7.718947 | 73.562632 | 63.736842 | 9.705263 | 37.947368 | 8.841846 | 3.437063 | 390 | 18 | 68 | 5 | 5 | 128 | 65 | 95 | 0.136 | 0.864 | 0 | -0.8857 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 13 | 11 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 5 | 18 | 9 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 37 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.370045 | 0 | 0.217753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170401 |
suicidewatch | billhyzer | 2018/12/25 | Merry Christmas The girl I love is happy with a new guy. There's no foreseeable future between us. That should be enough to make me want to move on but it's been 4 months and I feel worse every day. Planning my suicide now and taking my time to make sure it is done right. Don't want Christmas to be ruined forever for e... | 1.11475 | 3.142913 | 2.47 | 95.165 | 81.75 | 5 | 20.833333 | 5.985473 | -0.011917 | 447 | 13 | 99 | 3 | 12 | 144 | 81 | 120 | 0.171 | 0.606 | 0.223 | 0.5787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 18 | 28 | 6 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 17 | 6 | 13 | 20 | 1 | 16 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 65 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221181 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177185 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144479 | 0.163856 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169792 | 0 | 0.182543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.309535 | 0 | 0.343392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273747 | 0.182256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165616 | 0.182371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187571 | 0 | 0.323235 | 0 | 0.128932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109877 | 0 | 0 | 0.099991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | donewithitmane | 2018/12/25 | I just want help Please. The only way to get help in the UK is by paying too much to afford or attempting. I have overdosed 4 times in the last 7 days. I spent all morning in the accident center on christmas eve. The 4th time, they offered me help in two months. Please. | 1.051333 | 3.314927 | 2.359545 | 94.472652 | 83.727273 | 5.121212 | 20.075758 | 6.427356 | 0.100758 | 209 | 6 | 45 | 2 | 6 | 67 | 42 | 55 | 0.052 | 0.715 | 0.233 | 0.836 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 8 | 4 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 26 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.514674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204297 | 0 | 0.188153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194662 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.561913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150966 | 0.203161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Nonsense_constance | 2018/12/25 | Sometimes it feels like If I cut myself open, they'll all flow out of me like poison
And I can finally be rid of them all forever
That's why I want to die. I'm tired of fighting. I just want to be done. | -0.856957 | 0.923552 | 1.850174 | 98.183957 | 87.695652 | 5.41913 | 17.895652 | 6.742158 | -0.211108 | 156 | 4 | 40 | 2 | 5 | 54 | 35 | 46 | 0.284 | 0.571 | 0.145 | -0.8519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 6 | 5 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 25 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.335836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.331145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163617 | 0.231173 | 0 | 0.354478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.320039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.37192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.381724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | pmr92 | 2018/12/25 | one day soon knift and rope.
in blood it soak.
take away.
there is no hope.
stair at wall.
blindly alone.
there no hope.
when i realized that this inst me.
but still this my reality.
i expect no one to care at all.
cause no body ever calls.
so one day soon.
I will face you
no longer be
afriad to see.
and one day soon... | -3.64746 | -2.474986 | -0.803216 | 110.333977 | 113.085106 | 2.817215 | 7.894101 | 4.851558 | -2.410596 | 754 | 6 | 222 | 4 | 44 | 253 | 82 | 235 | 0.183 | 0.602 | 0.215 | 0.9588 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 45 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 18 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 26 | 8 | 7 | 3 | 2 | 24 | 46 | 13 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 4 | 34 | 21 | 14 | 18 | 4 | 34 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 12 | 0 | 3 | 20 | 143 | 41 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067142 | 0 | 0.168651 | 0 | 0 | 0.077519 | 0 | 0.154803 | 0.23396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.342717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06867 | 0 | 0.145082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208158 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050885 | 0 | 0 | 0.226205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.720197 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060627 | 0.063469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114159 | 0.061018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | CrewsD89 | 2018/12/25 | I cant handle being alone again 10 year relationship gone. My kids have been everything keeping me together. Knowing this is the last Christmas I'll be with them is worse than dying. I spent the night in my car drinking with a rifle at my head. My ex kept me from doing it this time, but it's only delaying the inevitabl... | 1.629372 | 3.693673 | 3.244682 | 90.096677 | 80.150442 | 5.879002 | 23.547064 | 6.980633 | 0.816051 | 430 | 15 | 90 | 5 | 11 | 142 | 78 | 113 | 0.153 | 0.767 | 0.08 | -0.8184 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 15 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 24 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 15 | 1 | 10 | 15 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 57 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.377957 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.361912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186725 | 0 | 0.178746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.327975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195332 | 0 | 0.197093 | 0 | 0 | 0.162183 | 0 | 0 | 0.100278 | 0.148733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199182 | 0 | 0.164682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171231 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194319 | 0.123643 | 0.138773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106397 | 0.209716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117501 |
suicidewatch | MyLastChristmas | 2018/12/25 | I'm tired... I've been in my garage with doors shut, windows of my car rolled down with the engine going for 17 minutes now. I feel at peace.
I've been off my meds for a month. Couldn't afford them again. I'm completely alone. I have no friends. I've been trying for my entire life across 3 different states. I'm just..... | -0.374928 | 1.888901 | 1.07823 | 99.638062 | 95.052632 | 3.816268 | 14.803828 | 5.565023 | -0.940326 | 284 | 6 | 64 | 2 | 11 | 90 | 53 | 76 | 0.13 | 0.809 | 0.061 | -0.5965 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 11 | 7 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 32 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29231 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.295917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.294875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.313499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.648774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | everythingZero | 2018/12/25 | Anyone else want to kill themselves last night? But didnt? I did wake up to a tree full of gifts from my clients which i am definitely grateful for but i still woke up in the wrong body (or with the wrong brain)... still hate myself... | 1.308298 | 3.570191 | 1.633447 | 100.094 | 82.617021 | 4.611064 | 17.910638 | 5.683918 | -0.709916 | 180 | 4 | 42 | 1 | 5 | 54 | 38 | 47 | 0.293 | 0.619 | 0.088 | -0.9388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 27 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174041 | 0.255033 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.276478 | 0 | 0.277861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275377 | 0 | 0 | 0.202891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.397553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.544278 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | suicidehelpplz | 2018/12/25 | Merry Christmas, I need help I'm 48 years old, married with two kids and so full of regret and sadness that I've concluded that it may be best for everyone if I just killed myself.
My wife and I have had a rocky marriage for the past 19 years. I've never stood up to her and she basically runs my life. Fwiw, I am ter... | 3.103596 | 4.302729 | 4.344706 | 87.591471 | 73.590708 | 7.441541 | 25.904737 | 7.928767 | 1.352124 | 3,433 | 114 | 735 | 48 | 68 | 1,130 | 366 | 904 | 0.169 | 0.738 | 0.093 | -0.9977 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 102 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 23 | 31 | 39 | 7 | 7 | 65 | 0 | 60 | 9 | 3 | 8 | 5 | 127 | 115 | 69 | 5 | 18 | 28 | 9 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 34 | 54 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 2 | 14 | 17 | 16 | 24 | 0 | 4 | 21 | 12 | 84 | 15 | 104 | 75 | 26 | 150 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 57 | 57 | 1 | 13 | 70 | 465 | 118 | 25 | 0.044061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048623 | 0.176179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041397 | 0.03388 | 0 | 0.026859 | 0.048662 | 0.074986 | 0 | 0.04624 | 0.038969 | 0.144311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070359 | 0 | 0 | 0.028416 | 0 | 0.03795 | 0 | 0 | 0.092069 | 0 | 0 | 0.038558 | 0.04509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039025 | 0.091054 | 0 | 0 | 0.039856 | 0 | 0.042102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111394 | 0.062955 | 0 | 0.048267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069061 | 0.042268 | 0.100164 | 0.11087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078941 | 0.087003 | 0.04522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059067 | 0 | 0 | 0.043763 | 0.086783 | 0.457567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174896 | 0.078327 | 0.146242 | 0 | 0.024215 | 0.035916 | 0 | 0 | 0.095745 | 0 | 0.093365 | 0.064578 | 0 | 0.077814 | 0.038993 | 0.037 | 0.14788 | 0 | 0.037459 | 0.039767 | 0.041692 | 0.117645 | 0.089342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035169 | 0.187321 | 0.03239 | 0.098013 | 0.101948 | 0.340437 | 0.093719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18494 | 0 | 0.029857 | 0 | 0.093769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126184 | 0.030547 | 0.076945 | 0.046035 | 0 | 0 | 0.049672 | 0.042199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046865 | 0 | 0 | 0.028227 | 0.045302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088226 | 0.178369 | 0.070222 | 0.040112 | 0 | 0 | 0.045228 | 0 | 0.049527 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100944 | 0 | 0 | 0.048196 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10277 | 0.050642 | 0 | 0 | 0.048954 | 0 | 0 | 0.043041 | 0 | 0.053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103954 | 0.139895 | 0.070687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22454 | 0 | 0.044902 | 0.0939 | 0 | 0 | 0.170244 |
suicidewatch | PEPSICOLA123456 | 2018/12/25 | Is anyone free to talk? Does anyone know where i can talk to someone?
Im not sure if its this sub or somewhere else on here but is there anyone that can talk to me right now as i have no one i can talk to about this issue?
I know its christmas and no one wants to deal with this shit right now but i have been sufferin... | 2.354844 | 4.162843 | 3.651974 | 89.263549 | 76.864078 | 6.519525 | 20.182309 | 7.38713 | 0.412589 | 395 | 9 | 85 | 5 | 9 | 129 | 69 | 103 | 0.184 | 0.671 | 0.144 | -0.7045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 16 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 13 | 13 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 57 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.337363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177952 | 0 | 0.10372 | 0.165806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134351 | 0 | 0.142445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173721 | 0.167862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176773 | 0.131096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217961 | 0 | 0.171132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20606 | 0 | 0 | 0.172668 | 0 | 0.274691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151578 | 0 | 0 | 0.517067 | 0 | 0.148068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114247 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | User_Interface_Scare | 2018/12/25 | Been thinking I think I’m gonna starve myself. I don’t really have any other forms of kms. I could always cut myself or use chemicals but I don’t want to accidentally kill whoever finds my body and I don’t really like cutting. I wish I had some anxiety pills and sleeping pills to OD on. | 1.5465 | 3.681899 | 4.24 | 82.475 | 80.833333 | 8 | 21.666667 | 8.841846 | 1.683667 | 229 | 7 | 47 | 6 | 6 | 81 | 44 | 60 | 0.265 | 0.596 | 0.139 | -0.8065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 14 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 1 | 4 | 10 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 28 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23431 | 0 | 0 | 0.191495 | 0 | 0.21542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.311544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.360795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.360871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243208 | 0 | 0 | 0.166093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.323821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | thatbender | 2018/12/25 | 10 years ago today I first tried to kill myself and I still wish it worked. Christmas is never easy for a kid in the system, but now I'm an adult and at uni, it means the only place I have to stay is my parents over the holidays, they constantly do everything they can to make me feel like crap, and never respect me, an... | 3.700253 | 3.836418 | 4.313772 | 92.276481 | 71.405063 | 7.332658 | 21.496203 | 6.742158 | 0.180747 | 578 | 9 | 136 | 4 | 10 | 184 | 99 | 158 | 0.158 | 0.722 | 0.12 | -0.7605 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 8 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 27 | 28 | 15 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 21 | 4 | 18 | 23 | 4 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 88 | 24 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137401 | 0 | 0 | 0.160536 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158275 | 0 | 0.158036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235122 | 0.110734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.342975 | 0 | 0.085185 | 0.126348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075727 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139896 | 0 | 0.103466 | 0 | 0 | 0.168843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239095 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165073 | 0 | 0.235773 | 0 | 0 | 0.172112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165212 | 0.123785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09932 | 0 | 0 | 0.090383 | 0 | 0.146925 | 0 | 0 | 0.210473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133873 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178246 | 0 | 0 | 0.338532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199633 |
suicidewatch | women_hate_ethnics | 2018/12/25 | no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf no gf | 24.99 | -4.44093 | 25.07 | 47.125 | 73.054054 | 29.6 | 74 | 3.1291 | 8.2278 | 148 | 0 | 74 | 0 | 1 | 74 | 2 | 74 | 0.688 | 0.312 | 0 | -0.9962 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 37 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 37 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 37 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 37 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | garbeldunk | 2018/12/25 | Thank you, and good night! It's been good!
Pft, it's been a load of crap. Enjoy. | -3.741667 | -3.10291 | -1.379444 | 112.9675 | 122.888889 | 1.8 | 4.5 | 3.1291 | -3.210933 | 59 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 4 | 19 | 14 | 18 | 0.105 | 0.405 | 0.49 | 0.8585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.787092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.440316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.43198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | entp42 | 2018/12/25 | Christmas day alone, suicidal, and in a lot of pain. Was told I need surgery but apparently couldn’t have it done yet because of the holidays. so this is my first post to reddit because i don’t have friends, and my family has made it obvious how little they care. basically i’ve been having severe chest and stomach pain... | 6.465112 | 5.947609 | 6.585341 | 80.56198 | 65.606171 | 9.524525 | 33.793164 | 8.841846 | 2.668683 | 2,189 | 85 | 435 | 30 | 30 | 701 | 241 | 551 | 0.242 | 0.676 | 0.082 | -0.9987 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 49 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 40 | 38 | 8 | 2 | 22 | 0 | 50 | 23 | 10 | 9 | 5 | 73 | 92 | 41 | 2 | 13 | 15 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 10 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 20 | 21 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 9 | 15 | 29 | 0 | 3 | 26 | 7 | 62 | 9 | 62 | 60 | 12 | 63 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 28 | 31 | 4 | 10 | 22 | 297 | 82 | 3 | 0.056204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058211 | 0 | 0.13484 | 0.046766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111479 | 0.039299 | 0 | 0.138754 | 0.050034 | 0.052543 | 0.191821 | 0 | 0 | 0.093856 | 0.342616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057391 | 0 | 0.171912 | 0.057737 | 0 | 0 | 0.058929 | 0 | 0 | 0.044875 | 0.124378 | 0.061738 | 0.144988 | 0 | 0.145226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057527 | 0 | 0.115033 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062683 | 0.296979 | 0 | 0 | 0.053706 | 0.050513 | 0 | 0.052984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061569 | 0 | 0.047807 | 0.067962 | 0 | 0.13027 | 0.10392 | 0.117458 | 0 | 0.127769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05983 | 0.050348 | 0 | 0 | 0.059742 | 0 | 0.133205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062182 | 0 | 0 | 0.045814 | 0 | 0.059512 | 0 | 0 | 0.039699 | 0 | 0.056331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061354 | 0.095566 | 0 | 0.106364 | 0.075034 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089723 | 0.059736 | 0 | 0.125024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038085 | 0 | 0.418637 | 0.065944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159394 | 0 | 0.053828 | 0 | 0.060598 | 0.10756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063495 | 0.057693 | 0 | 0 | 0.056245 | 0 | 0.047622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061478 | 0.06378 | 0 | 0 | 0.042259 | 0.045175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074679 | 0.072027 | 0.05522 | 0.08924 | 0.032773 | 0 | 0.053275 | 0.161117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066301 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052102 | 0 | 0 | 0.064632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171831 | 0.079852 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | RdiitUsar | 2018/12/25 | I am not good enough I am not good enough for school. I am fucking average at everything. Grades, college, life. No matter how hard i try i am just fucking average. Maybr if i am lucky i go slightly above average. But thats about how good i get, i have nothing going on for me. I am a useless piece of shit that is wasti... | 1.416025 | 3.800719 | 3.650991 | 85.010532 | 83.244186 | 6.644308 | 27.075887 | 7.854513 | 2.005228 | 669 | 31 | 128 | 13 | 19 | 229 | 99 | 172 | 0.233 | 0.61 | 0.157 | -0.9368 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 18 | 5 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 24 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 17 | 33 | 10 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 22 | 11 | 12 | 28 | 7 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 6 | 5 | 2 | 3 | 97 | 30 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107718 | 0.376994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218606 | 0 | 0 | 0.136855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.449738 | 0.063541 | 0 | 0.138237 | 0.408032 | 0 | 0.134085 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120688 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085903 | 0.118834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123085 | 0.096914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ICantStopLovingHer | 2018/12/25 | Really feel like everyone would be better off without me My life has been falling apart around me since I lost my job 6 or so months ago. It was a good paying job that provided for my family. I lost it, and I haven't been able to find work in that field since. There is zero market for it, it's been outsourced to the... | 2.857727 | 3.785025 | 4.218561 | 89.307841 | 73.848485 | 7.19697 | 22.840909 | 7.492282 | 0.728727 | 610 | 15 | 136 | 7 | 12 | 202 | 103 | 165 | 0.105 | 0.814 | 0.081 | -0.1939 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 7 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 21 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 18 | 33 | 8 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 3 | 27 | 4 | 20 | 18 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 95 | 35 | 7 | 0.128056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113514 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113997 | 0 | 0 | 0.240626 | 0 | 0 | 0.078062 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113255 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.300162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122363 | 0 | 0 | 0.12072 | 0 | 0.064749 | 0.091483 | 0 | 0 | 0.117041 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072777 | 0.107408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.381228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09045 | 0.062562 | 0 | 0.226152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.419366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170957 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133792 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101836 | 0.128207 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192565 | 0 | 0.111927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151062 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123442 | 0 | 0.093227 | 0 | 0 | 0.090968 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | kingko001 | 2018/12/25 | I want to die What is the less painful method to suicide? | 2.2325 | 3.783031 | 1.873333 | 103.005 | 76.5 | 4.8 | 28.666667 | 3.1291 | 0.295567 | 45 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 11 | 12 | 0.57 | 0.363 | 0.067 | -0.8935 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.535672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.54921 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.564574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Dewlilly_76 | 2018/12/25 | My nieces boyfriend took his life this morning Please think of how taking your own life affects the ones you leave behind. My 22 year old niece now has to live each day with the regrets and guilt of what she might of done differently to have saved her boyfriend but it was beyond her control.
I know Christmas is a ti... | 6.770516 | 7.820273 | 5.680806 | 81.94121 | 64.935484 | 8.264516 | 32.274194 | 8.238736 | 2.35931 | 673 | 26 | 120 | 8 | 10 | 200 | 108 | 155 | 0.125 | 0.819 | 0.056 | -0.895 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 11 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 24 | 18 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 17 | 1 | 23 | 12 | 4 | 23 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 17 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 84 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147992 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138187 | 0 | 0 | 0.272662 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127883 | 0 | 0.129547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079477 | 0 | 0 | 0.306255 | 0.157126 | 0 | 0.204293 | 0 | 0 | 0.255397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138763 | 0 | 0.3035 | 0 | 0.097995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100258 | 0 | 0 | 0.31749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150866 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.316373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092664 | 0 | 0.114809 | 0.084327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186256 |
suicidewatch | throwaway9898765 | 2018/12/25 | Longest several months of my life A few months ago, my girlfriend blew up and said all kinds of hurtful things to me in front of her kids. Broke my heart and because of that and a boatload of other stuff, I kicked her out of my house. A week later my stepdad who had terminal cancer collapsed and I stayed with him and m... | 3.913828 | 4.820741 | 4.462373 | 88.621643 | 71.33244 | 7.561518 | 25.606207 | 7.74847 | 1.157082 | 1,439 | 42 | 309 | 17 | 26 | 457 | 196 | 373 | 0.12 | 0.87 | 0.01 | -0.9824 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 37 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 13 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 22 | 0 | 10 | 15 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 48 | 42 | 30 | 7 | 2 | 2 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 21 | 29 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 8 | 45 | 3 | 49 | 24 | 10 | 56 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 38 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 29 | 194 | 66 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151476 | 0 | 0 | 0.088491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058103 | 0.089592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065699 | 0.071339 | 0.052084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.354695 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112865 | 0 | 0 | 0.081642 | 0 | 0 | 0.080546 | 0 | 0.043201 | 0 | 0.082036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078988 | 0 | 0 | 0.194231 | 0 | 0.136669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076538 | 0.084355 | 0.175373 | 0 | 0 | 0.101248 | 0.114538 | 0 | 0.171408 | 0 | 0 | 0.197174 | 0.091466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088973 | 0 | 0.208936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060349 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.300201 | 0.136396 | 0 | 0.062809 | 0.063353 | 0 | 0 | 0.090867 | 0.240541 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081274 | 0.067946 | 0 | 0 | 0.13617 | 0 | 0 | 0.096524 | 0.087704 | 0 | 0 | 0.171005 | 0 | 0.072394 | 0 | 0 | 0.095644 | 0.060475 | 0.182137 | 0 | 0.071432 | 0 | 0 | 0.097809 | 0 | 0 | 0.080527 | 0 | 0 | 0.137348 | 0.074679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170289 | 0.054747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073793 | 0 | 0.070497 | 0.050395 | 0.067819 | 0.137071 | 0 | 0 | 0.158409 | 0.077097 | 0.095391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055021 |
suicidewatch | bbellacruz | 2018/12/25 | would this be fatal? these are the only things i currently have in my house and i really do not feel like going outside so i hope this would be enough.
i have 1000mg fluoxetine, 110mg diazepam and a basically an infinite amount of alcohol. if i mix all of these together, would that be enough to end my life? or at lea... | 2.372585 | 4.140496 | 4.233974 | 85.288803 | 76.692308 | 8.083761 | 23.094017 | 8.841846 | 1.55555 | 398 | 12 | 85 | 9 | 9 | 135 | 72 | 104 | 0.074 | 0.797 | 0.129 | 0.7804 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 13 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 21 | 8 | 3 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 4 | 12 | 14 | 7 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 64 | 16 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0.172311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156393 | 0.547347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178563 | 0.25229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175379 | 0 | 0.203743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12472 | 0.172531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141013 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132762 | 0 | 0 | 0.162566 | 0 | 0 | 0.117308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128548 | 0 | 0 | 0.376301 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | messythehoe | 2018/12/25 | I have nothing no friends or people that genuinely care, just loneliness. no self esteem or confidence anymore, i’m depressed and ugly. there’s no more optimism left in me, really apathetic. i have 22 pills of fluoxetine and i just need to totally accept and be okay with killing myself. that’s all that is left to do. i... | 1.751164 | 4.271693 | 3.353913 | 86.772676 | 83.086957 | 6.668896 | 23.628763 | 7.882392 | 1.476599 | 458 | 17 | 90 | 9 | 13 | 151 | 79 | 115 | 0.125 | 0.683 | 0.192 | 0.7103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 21 | 18 | 9 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 8 | 9 | 16 | 4 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 61 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.601996 | 0 | 0 | 0.09023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273889 | 0 | 0.178374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118317 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192671 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131198 | 0 | 0 | 0.118934 |
suicidewatch | AKDangerzone | 2018/12/25 | Is it worth it? Everyone except my mother has stopped talking to me... My whole purpose in life was to protect them... I'm scared for when my mom dies. I think I'll probably end it too. But so far Christmas has been me getting disowned and belittled. Why keep going for one person
| 1.167299 | 3.739133 | 2.707013 | 89.649091 | 87.545455 | 5.324675 | 26.038961 | 6.86897 | 1.35526 | 218 | 10 | 42 | 3 | 7 | 71 | 45 | 55 | 0.132 | 0.793 | 0.076 | -0.5106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 10 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 28 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143618 | 0 | 0.156225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.321946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.296376 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275211 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248044 | 0.306903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | saraleezz | 2018/12/25 | I wrote my suicide note today. The day started out okay, and I (f) really had no intention to kill myself this morning. The day went really well actually, until late at night. My partner (f) reminded me today that my attitude makes everything “not worthwhile” and I realised that all I’ve ever done my whole life is caus... | 3.965001 | 5.161749 | 5.292714 | 81.627912 | 71.491349 | 8.549745 | 27.602735 | 8.976282 | 2.170939 | 1,136 | 40 | 223 | 22 | 21 | 380 | 155 | 289 | 0.129 | 0.732 | 0.139 | 0.4916 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 34 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 14 | 2 | 0 | 15 | 1 | 15 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 43 | 39 | 20 | 5 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 15 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 7 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 13 | 2 | 36 | 10 | 31 | 24 | 2 | 44 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 18 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 25 | 147 | 51 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0.177418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098235 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060041 | 0.164455 | 0.07659 | 0.173725 | 0.163397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290306 | 0 | 0.089749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100572 | 0 | 0.049958 | 0.074099 | 0.102543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164088 | 0.172031 | 0.060679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085307 | 0 | 0.087225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184796 | 0.069136 | 0.096728 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063021 | 0.158747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181857 | 0 | 0.116471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205952 | 0 | 0 | 0.07229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075197 | 0.10218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.344664 | 0.260587 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078512 | 0.100118 | 0 | 0.160852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081733 | 0.084269 | 0 | 0.101491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064575 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | jilakske | 2018/12/25 | am i really expected to go on another 50 years with mad depression & the thought of wanting to die 24.7? jesus fuck | 3.569565 | 5.657084 | 5.825435 | 73.779891 | 74.217391 | 11.556522 | 33.23913 | 11.208143 | 4.815626 | 94 | 5 | 17 | 4 | 2 | 33 | 22 | 23 | 0.443 | 0.557 | 0 | -0.936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.407395 | 0 | 0 | 0.394268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.323848 | 0 | 0.390228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.347605 | 0 | 0 | 0.213689 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242131 |
suicidewatch | 0731199602 | 2018/12/25 | Fuck it I'm This is my end this is where I bend
Can't even understand this insane blend
These thoughts are starting to remind of all of them Thots
Shit I thought I was strong, hell I was so wrong
This time my mind has me in a strong bind
Hell these lines are just in mind
Don't even know where they come from
They are l... | 0.356566 | 2.2095 | 1.468697 | 102.272588 | 83.437751 | 4.465928 | 17.791325 | 5.108053 | -0.889387 | 1,777 | 39 | 446 | 6 | 50 | 556 | 193 | 498 | 0.338 | 0.599 | 0.063 | -0.9996 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 16 | 12 | 8 | 33 | 57 | 29 | 1 | 18 | 0 | 55 | 19 | 8 | 6 | 4 | 57 | 107 | 22 | 2 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 27 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 2 | 1 | 13 | 19 | 43 | 1 | 2 | 16 | 7 | 86 | 13 | 46 | 85 | 6 | 54 | 18 | 6 | 3 | 10 | 39 | 18 | 22 | 2 | 25 | 287 | 113 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139565 | 0 | 0.052618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066309 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145874 | 0.0528 | 0.154193 | 0 | 0.053809 | 0.071246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072325 | 0.128947 | 0 | 0 | 0.21789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208386 | 0.040782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056009 | 0 | 0 | 0.208835 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.584609 | 0.066077 | 0 | 0.179693 | 0 | 0.101152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062433 | 0.129797 | 0 | 0 | 0.074935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069961 | 0 | 0.139012 | 0.154638 | 0 | 0.066958 | 0 | 0.064663 | 0 | 0.061788 | 0 | 0 | 0.055962 | 0 | 0.070745 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059836 | 0.042211 | 0.064112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060152 | 0.150864 | 0 | 0 | 0.050391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129822 | 0.05231 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10716 | 0.048682 | 0 | 0 | 0.223795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047546 | 0 | 0.165814 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081038 | 0 | 0.100405 | 0.110621 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042933 | 0 | 0 | 0.065831 | 0 | 0.054616 | 0 | 0 | 0.037298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069139 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | jayjaybinx | 2018/12/25 | lost all passion for life i should be capable of so much more but i just haven't achieved. i'm a 26 year old "loser" who hates his life. i'm dreading going back to work on Friday. i feel like i have no purpose. i'm so depressed.
thinking about suicide continuously the last few days. i think i should go to the hospita... | 0.535909 | 2.885022 | 2.466894 | 92.070341 | 87.484848 | 5.118182 | 23.401515 | 6.627428 | 0.673642 | 250 | 10 | 54 | 3 | 8 | 83 | 50 | 66 | 0.32 | 0.589 | 0.09 | -0.9681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 15 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 6 | 11 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 32 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170561 | 0 | 0.227788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133724 | 0.188937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.300609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.373606 | 0.129207 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277517 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.289287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.338923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192537 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17031 |
suicidewatch | CommitteeOfOne | 2018/12/25 | I am such an awful person Well, I've already caused my immediate family to all yell at me. I am so tired of living. I know there's not a god, because if there was surely he would have answered my prayers and killed me by now.
I am so tired of always being disappointed and being a disappointment.
If I didn't think it ... | 2.290679 | 3.973863 | 4.376132 | 84.552317 | 76.682927 | 7.124739 | 22.689895 | 7.957252 | 1.09497 | 311 | 9 | 65 | 5 | 7 | 107 | 57 | 82 | 0.332 | 0.602 | 0.065 | -0.9812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 17 | 14 | 7 | 2 | 6 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 13 | 2 | 6 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 50 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225109 | 0 | 0.169737 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.451372 | 0 | 0.112108 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192259 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.468916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.434729 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Asarax | 2018/12/25 | Planing my suicide Hi, I‘m about to commit suicide as soon as I get home. Im currently away for christmas to My uncle and My Little cousin who is like a sister to me. Im diagnosed with Depression for ~10 years now. Im only 21. I cant remember happyness. Not Even My Parents can remember to have seen me being happy. I ca... | 0.84791 | 3.386124 | 3.174196 | 85.624798 | 89.755814 | 5.782002 | 23.757331 | 7.255503 | 1.422284 | 677 | 28 | 127 | 12 | 23 | 231 | 104 | 172 | 0.17 | 0.732 | 0.099 | -0.9516 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 13 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 29 | 7 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 24 | 5 | 21 | 20 | 1 | 12 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 81 | 30 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098993 | 0 | 0 | 0.064229 | 0.116366 | 0.089657 | 0 | 0 | 0.093186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1815 | 0.106942 | 0.109351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165145 | 0 | 0.059881 | 0 | 0.084269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093173 | 0.112162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070623 | 0 | 0.317066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.569056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115811 | 0 | 0 | 0.223131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051476 | 0.105602 | 0 | 0.093244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106143 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078126 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080134 | 0 | 0 | 0.116994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.358071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081114 | 0 | 0.117946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067851 |
suicidewatch | snarks_ | 2018/12/25 | Loneliness hurts Backstory: I lost my dad 4 months ago and he was my emotional rock and my best friend. I also have BPD and depression and social anxiety. I’ve been self harming since I was 14. I don’t really know where to post this but this place has always been supportive.
People who said they would call and have... | 2.064944 | 4.148007 | 3.491559 | 88.780968 | 78.788918 | 6.955174 | 22.928833 | 7.984001 | 1.1982 | 1,467 | 47 | 304 | 26 | 36 | 481 | 199 | 379 | 0.32 | 0.584 | 0.096 | -0.9989 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 34 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 18 | 36 | 7 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 39 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 63 | 64 | 40 | 3 | 9 | 11 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 29 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 13 | 26 | 0 | 5 | 14 | 4 | 47 | 10 | 42 | 39 | 9 | 32 | 2 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 24 | 15 | 3 | 5 | 13 | 210 | 58 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07084 | 0.073708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067766 | 0 | 0.087851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078858 | 0 | 0 | 0.083227 | 0 | 0.147927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223135 | 0 | 0.090453 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076297 | 0 | 0.091935 | 0.092551 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199288 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117017 | 0 | 0.074635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083508 | 0.099681 | 0.04479 | 0.063284 | 0 | 0.097039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205318 | 0.081894 | 0.046281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070848 | 0 | 0.097584 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09416 | 0 | 0 | 0.059375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.474151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086555 | 0 | 0.156441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05913 | 0.08981 | 0.177988 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070706 | 0 | 0.065119 | 0 | 0.068321 | 0 | 0 | 0.083129 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061412 | 0 | 0.092551 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056749 | 0.091078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07565 | 0.084263 | 0.070445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092412 | 0.200148 | 0 | 0.073277 | 0 | 0 | 0.090299 | 0.075056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100523 | 0 | 0 | 0.066604 | 0 | 0.077426 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120284 | 0 | 0.086533 | 0 | 0.106555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062927 | 0.096852 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | EmmaB81 | 2018/12/25 | I was dreading today It's been the worst year of my life and I've come close a few times to not being here.
People on here have been kind and supportive and it's wonderful to read comments here of everyone helping each other and lending an ear to listen.
I'm still not in a great place and there are still many days I ... | 3.764818 | 4.371131 | 4.482338 | 89.445166 | 71.462687 | 7.448093 | 26.829187 | 7.38713 | 1.176363 | 505 | 16 | 111 | 5 | 9 | 162 | 83 | 134 | 0.072 | 0.738 | 0.19 | 0.9398 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 12 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 24 | 22 | 14 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 8 | 7 | 12 | 18 | 5 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 12 | 78 | 15 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.470997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083077 | 0.117378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220258 | 0 | 0 | 0.16319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116052 | 0.08027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131145 | 0 | 0.120782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156846 | 0.113907 | 0 | 0.171662 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126489 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.393639 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095807 | 0 | 0.15574 | 0 | 0 | 0.223103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17818 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105806 |
suicidewatch | gfjhbiknhkoffbyebye | 2018/12/25 | Bye I’m 16 and I think it’s just about time to leave this place. Bye | -3.912549 | -2.690789 | -1.58 | 116.483333 | 110.764706 | 2.266667 | 5.666667 | 3.1291 | -3.197533 | 53 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 3 | 17 | 15 | 17 | 0.085 | 0.915 | 0 | -0.0516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.6151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.606928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.372224 | 0 | 0 | 0.338733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Aesz14 | 2018/12/25 | Tomorrow I'll die. Everything is prepared.
I don't give a single fuck anymore. My life is absolute trash.
No real friends, familly is absolute trash, abused... Death's gonna be a sweet relief.
I'm sorry for the rant. Take care of you. | 0.080217 | 2.31734 | 2.300326 | 88.811793 | 101.608696 | 5.778261 | 23.141304 | 7.168622 | 1.536617 | 182 | 8 | 35 | 4 | 8 | 61 | 39 | 46 | 0.178 | 0.51 | 0.312 | 0.81 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0.352524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.295069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.303351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.308789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229871 | 0.275061 | 0 | 0.285417 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210154 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.338654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.33306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | don_la | 2018/12/25 | I did something horrible, I can’t continue living. Last night I did something horrible and I hate myself for it. I’ve been depressed a while now, coming close multiple times but the guilt of last night, even with forgiveness is weighing down too much on me. I can’t bare to look at myself in the mirror, I don’t deserve ... | 3.160487 | 4.696901 | 4.46513 | 85.440909 | 74 | 7.301299 | 26.207792 | 7.957252 | 1.568193 | 342 | 12 | 68 | 5 | 7 | 113 | 60 | 88 | 0.298 | 0.674 | 0.028 | -0.9791 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 13 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 10 | 1 | 13 | 10 | 3 | 18 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 45 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268429 | 0 | 0 | 0.395544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214243 | 0 | 0.203744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.455375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.37357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141477 | 0 | 0.229981 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | THP_throwaway | 2018/12/25 | I just tried to hang myself. I can't even do that right. I just tried to use my belt to hang myself from the deckbead, but my belt snapped and now I think I've sprained my ankle.
I just want to die.
I'm stuck here. My partner hates me because I am working away. I haven't seen you my kids in months and won't see the... | -0.942482 | 0.976793 | 0.849264 | 104.21215 | 89.649351 | 3.422222 | 16.347763 | 3.1291 | -1.342888 | 530 | 12 | 137 | 0 | 18 | 171 | 83 | 154 | 0.231 | 0.681 | 0.088 | -0.9809 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 19 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 18 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 24 | 32 | 7 | 2 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 29 | 3 | 15 | 25 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 95 | 34 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162829 | 0 | 0 | 0.105647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.359734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144777 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.343407 | 0.156768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133898 | 0.160221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145363 | 0 | 0 | 0.190919 | 0 | 0 | 0.18449 | 0 | 0.171107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.276667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149683 | 0 | 0 | 0.306666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | calm-and-reposed | 2018/12/25 | I have nothing left I've experienced probably the most traumatic year of my life next to the years as a child I was sexually abused. I'm living out in the middle of nowhere with no transportation because I had to drop everything and move due to my mother's disability. Car stopped working a month after that and can't af... | 6.046848 | 5.40757 | 7.041435 | 77.351391 | 66.5 | 10.403478 | 34.16087 | 9.888513 | 3.08773 | 714 | 29 | 148 | 14 | 10 | 241 | 116 | 184 | 0.117 | 0.848 | 0.035 | -0.9219 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 11 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 24 | 22 | 12 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 19 | 3 | 22 | 16 | 2 | 33 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 9 | 12 | 0 | 5 | 14 | 93 | 27 | 3 | 0 | 0.161461 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128033 | 0 | 0 | 0.166141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217606 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120697 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124551 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105284 | 0 | 0.071197 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148061 | 0 | 0.096254 | 0.066576 | 0 | 0.240663 | 0 | 0.22887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122992 | 0 | 0.090963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159601 | 0.108772 | 0.144836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131613 | 0.144928 | 0 | 0.133518 | 0.130757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277026 | 0.103642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094474 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29385 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153176 | 0 | 0 | 0.115464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.324501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198417 | 0 | 0.138874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17551 |
suicidewatch | Loreleyloraflor | 2018/12/25 | hallo hey. i never wanted to REALLY kill myself. until now. when looking into the mirror all i see is a empty shell. i guess i am dead for years but didnt see it. if i only had anyone when i was a child. when i was a teen. someone who showed me a way. any way. anyone who i trusted abused me in some way or another. i am... | -2.287619 | -0.70676 | 0.500507 | 101.319783 | 108.497487 | 2.613121 | 13.065466 | 4.475607 | -1.489952 | 692 | 15 | 165 | 2 | 36 | 235 | 102 | 199 | 0.221 | 0.595 | 0.183 | -0.7006 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 35 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 21 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 24 | 35 | 11 | 2 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 7 | 34 | 8 | 13 | 24 | 8 | 23 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 16 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 17 | 118 | 44 | 0 | 0 | 0.154451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088647 | 0.13669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273445 | 0 | 0.107272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143603 | 0.129074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154473 | 0.087375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.294096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115362 | 0.109467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117652 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095827 | 0 | 0.100539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250161 | 0 | 0.136787 | 0 | 0.088333 | 0.099142 | 0.138709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.286185 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.331352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153775 | 0.310413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083945 |
suicidewatch | zeitcrunch | 2018/12/25 | I don't know anymore Early on I was happy despite being bullied relentlessly and living with my emotionally abusive father. I knew what I wanted to be and how I was going to get there, but now I'm slowly going downhill I can feel myself getting slower and dumber every day. I've cost my mother so much money because I ju... | 3.196635 | 3.922153 | 4.612565 | 87.556929 | 72.852459 | 6.724783 | 22.139826 | 6.522977 | 0.410672 | 904 | 19 | 194 | 6 | 17 | 302 | 148 | 244 | 0.104 | 0.814 | 0.082 | -0.7536 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 20 | 10 | 5 | 4 | 2 | 38 | 54 | 12 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 13 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 5 | 23 | 4 | 25 | 44 | 6 | 39 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 16 | 6 | 5 | 2 | 24 | 118 | 32 | 2 | 0 | 0.131382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098294 | 0 | 0.111036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075406 | 0.116274 | 0 | 0 | 0.109969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113056 | 0 | 0 | 0.095519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088534 | 0 | 0 | 0.143025 | 0.114319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128593 | 0.113464 | 0 | 0.124732 | 0.098212 | 0.114575 | 0 | 0.073239 | 0 | 0.093426 | 0 | 0.099657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08567 | 0.307537 | 0.1738 | 0 | 0.378115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098561 | 0 | 0 | 0.12188 | 0.090387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054173 | 0 | 0.097914 | 0.098131 | 0.093116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148035 | 0 | 0 | 0.120787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088508 | 0 | 0.081514 | 0 | 0.085522 | 0.214189 | 0 | 0.104059 | 0.108645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071036 | 0.114009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227646 | 0 | 0 | 0.110966 | 0.113034 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088554 | 0.092706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130807 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214221 |
suicidewatch | InquisitiveSpirits | 2018/12/25 | It's up to you There is always a choice. That is all it is. A decision. YOUR decision. You choose your path. You create your story. Do not let other people influence your outcome. Your insecurities brew from experience and perhaps you haven't experienced the proper company. The darkness in me seeks inspiration for othe... | 3.552715 | 6.768328 | 4.803624 | 73.832926 | 84.280899 | 8.359925 | 27.641386 | 8.841846 | 3.282482 | 402 | 18 | 63 | 12 | 12 | 132 | 65 | 89 | 0.125 | 0.759 | 0.115 | -0.0041 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 14 | 13 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 15 | 2 | 8 | 9 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 53 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.306072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241742 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.319957 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.341563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.652837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | imogenocide | 2018/12/25 | I’m just tired I’m tired, humans are gross, I tried. | -2.73 | -1.132514 | -0.466667 | 109.095 | 105.666667 | 2.4 | 6 | 3.1291 | -2.8693 | 40 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 8 | 12 | 0.597 | 0.403 | 0 | -0.836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.959044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheDudeShallAbide | 2018/12/25 | I feel like I can't take it anymore This year has been the worst year of my life, everything has completely fallen apart. I can't find work, my fiance has left me and the hours of therapy I have done have barely helped.
My ex fiance messaged me on the day before Christmas to tell me she was seeing someone, she says it... | 3.150722 | 4.161416 | 4.22059 | 89.252812 | 73.238411 | 7.610114 | 23.661048 | 8.000946 | 0.983511 | 568 | 15 | 127 | 8 | 11 | 185 | 91 | 151 | 0.193 | 0.737 | 0.071 | -0.9631 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 19 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 17 | 29 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 22 | 4 | 12 | 22 | 2 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 80 | 29 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137109 | 0.166885 | 0.172004 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.349678 | 0.10265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140976 | 0.164463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14305 | 0 | 0.15005 | 0.179109 | 0.160961 | 0.22742 | 0 | 0 | 0.145477 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141476 | 0 | 0 | 0.17495 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172937 | 0 | 0.112425 | 0.155523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166297 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126577 | 0 | 0 | 0.126837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119675 | 0 | 0.13912 | 0 | 0.182023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.307498 |
suicidewatch | ShinoaCC | 2018/12/25 | Ligature Marking On My Neck A few days ago, I attempted to commit suicide but on the last second someone arrived and saved me. Slowly a mark on my neck started to appear. And now it's dark brown. I've searched the internet about this "Neck Mark" and it's called a "Ligature Marking". I am unsure if this Ligature mark w... | 3.487308 | 4.914976 | 4.910769 | 83.009231 | 72.974359 | 8.276923 | 29.666667 | 8.841846 | 2.433344 | 305 | 13 | 60 | 6 | 6 | 102 | 51 | 78 | 0.098 | 0.834 | 0.068 | -0.3182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 5 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 1 | 9 | 3 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 42 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304783 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.351087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.311012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280266 | 0 | 0 | 0.37357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.291324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243363 | 0.366475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.376092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | tallrabbitt | 2018/12/25 | I'm at a loss my boyfriend's away over Christmas and I kinda "relapsed" and hurt myself pretty bad. I'd tried really hard to stop and even threw out all my razors n shit but broke down and bought some a few days ago,, I know it wont heal before I see him again and I dunno what to do. I promised him I'd call him if I fe... | 0.485751 | 1.943544 | 2.92 | 93.993846 | 81.206897 | 5.840849 | 17.360743 | 6.671995 | -0.26656 | 503 | 9 | 121 | 5 | 13 | 174 | 90 | 145 | 0.293 | 0.626 | 0.082 | -0.9869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 34 | 19 | 16 | 1 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 24 | 4 | 12 | 11 | 3 | 14 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 2 | 8 | 8 | 79 | 27 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129611 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147979 | 0 | 0.131508 | 0 | 0 | 0.134023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.482484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.312087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079638 | 0 | 0.151227 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.33722 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174253 | 0 | 0.173119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167085 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201801 | 0.161939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125782 | 0.131679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106934 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | diggsy1 | 2018/12/25 | Don't even care anymore Honestly, Im so done with everything. Parents always loved my sister more than me and they're always shouting at and berating me. Don't have friends. Get bullied. Always been told by people that it'll get better soon. Hasn't got better in the last 2 years. Not gonna wait 2 more to leave high sc... | 1.400038 | 3.986629 | 2.464904 | 91.861971 | 86.076923 | 5.096154 | 20.432692 | 6.627428 | 0.407192 | 259 | 8 | 51 | 3 | 8 | 82 | 54 | 65 | 0.151 | 0.672 | 0.178 | 0.4478 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 6 | 9 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 26 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.499733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.354111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154669 | 0 | 0.209186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163185 | 0 | 0.211977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222292 | 0 | 0 | 0.138789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202607 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128918 |
suicidewatch | robertdenero90 | 2018/12/25 | Please help me find a way to die easily and more comforting way
I don’t know why i am posting here but i feel to share my little story. At first you should know i am an introvert person. Thats why i don’t had many friend in school or college or University. I feel very shy talking with another people. I come from a dev... | 2.186828 | 4.549233 | 3.510073 | 87.332195 | 79.896708 | 6.321912 | 23.977311 | 7.51301 | 1.216084 | 3,502 | 125 | 687 | 53 | 90 | 1,141 | 345 | 881 | 0.17 | 0.686 | 0.144 | -0.9903 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 89 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 11 | 45 | 38 | 1 | 3 | 24 | 0 | 78 | 17 | 4 | 3 | 12 | 121 | 120 | 68 | 15 | 12 | 29 | 3 | 4 | 6 | 3 | 11 | 11 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 35 | 29 | 2 | 4 | 23 | 3 | 12 | 10 | 30 | 11 | 2 | 11 | 12 | 5 | 102 | 27 | 79 | 91 | 22 | 110 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 49 | 34 | 0 | 21 | 61 | 446 | 137 | 17 | 0.10965 | 0 | 0.035667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040334 | 0.116916 | 0.030412 | 0 | 0 | 0.149131 | 0.038326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.025557 | 0 | 0.030077 | 0 | 0.068339 | 0 | 0.06868 | 0.056209 | 0.030518 | 0.111402 | 0.080733 | 0 | 0.041179 | 0 | 0 | 0.039903 | 0.040599 | 0 | 0 | 0.037322 | 0.041803 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094454 | 0.038322 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.341398 | 0 | 0 | 0.03741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081526 | 0 | 0 | 0.030795 | 0.034925 | 0.032849 | 0 | 0.17228 | 0 | 0.036961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133624 | 0.093268 | 0.088393 | 0 | 0.056477 | 0 | 0.019096 | 0 | 0.020772 | 0.061313 | 0.087697 | 0.120889 | 0 | 0 | 0.064642 | 0 | 0.032742 | 0 | 0 | 0.038851 | 0 | 0 | 0.097995 | 0 | 0.036663 | 0.036302 | 0.035994 | 0.084347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.03627 | 0.064975 | 0.040437 | 0 | 0.140608 | 0.238345 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.232347 | 0.107139 | 0.109898 | 0.161371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07381 | 0.042807 | 0.262564 | 0 | 0 | 0.054203 | 0.02819 | 0 | 0.038871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040584 | 0 | 0 | 0.101356 | 0.063828 | 0 | 0.080242 | 0 | 0.041205 | 0.070009 | 0 | 0 | 0.034973 | 0 | 0 | 0.040944 | 0 | 0.03656 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.031213 | 0 | 0.029066 | 0 | 0.073981 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.030234 | 0 | 0.073153 | 0 | 0.030969 | 0 | 0.036149 | 0 | 0.129351 | 0.038957 | 0 | 0 | 0.041868 | 0 | 0 | 0.119939 | 0.041476 | 0.068896 | 0 | 0 | 0.088132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169975 | 0.046839 | 0.03591 | 0.029017 | 0.063938 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14889 | 0 | 0.142816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180945 | 0.043116 | 0.232093 | 0 | 0 | 0.065726 | 0 | 0.197884 | 0.040807 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | DrOOPdeadStupid | 2018/12/25 | A Little Self Loathing Story I was originally going to call this Suicude Note.
**Suicide Note**
If I die it'll most probably be due to one of the three following,
1. I pissed off too many people and one of them killed me
2. Heart Attack
3. Car accident
If its one or two than you’d know that I don't care an... | 0.703886 | 2.90712 | 2.349285 | 94.374044 | 84.711136 | 5.436159 | 19.323583 | 6.787042 | 0.131306 | 3,389 | 93 | 753 | 41 | 100 | 1,107 | 350 | 907 | 0.142 | 0.757 | 0.101 | -0.993 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 132 | 2 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 38 | 48 | 10 | 5 | 40 | 4 | 72 | 26 | 13 | 11 | 10 | 138 | 151 | 42 | 7 | 21 | 29 | 6 | 10 | 6 | 2 | 12 | 12 | 3 | 1 | 10 | 61 | 27 | 3 | 8 | 27 | 5 | 12 | 13 | 22 | 23 | 2 | 14 | 19 | 20 | 101 | 25 | 100 | 106 | 19 | 84 | 3 | 4 | 7 | 4 | 56 | 33 | 7 | 18 | 39 | 480 | 162 | 9 | 0.099314 | 0 | 0.096916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049247 | 0 | 0 | 0.040864 | 0 | 0 | 0.056492 | 0.046655 | 0.076367 | 0 | 0.060541 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152117 | 0 | 0.101258 | 0.051012 | 0.052531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051536 | 0.051881 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050817 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055381 | 0.131192 | 0.089836 | 0 | 0 | 0.044629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225973 | 0.035475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045907 | 0 | 0 | 0.169328 | 0 | 0.039715 | 0 | 0.054703 | 0.049168 | 0.043912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050963 | 0 | 0 | 0.058844 | 0 | 0 | 0.04981 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098554 | 0.044138 | 0.109877 | 0 | 0.191032 | 0.040477 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280595 | 0.14556 | 0.04977 | 0.043848 | 0 | 0.0417 | 0 | 0.054207 | 0 | 0.044818 | 0 | 0.198879 | 0.050345 | 0.099775 | 0.108182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05014 | 0 | 0.079272 | 0 | 0.109511 | 0 | 0.114896 | 0.047959 | 0.105622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269192 | 0.188833 | 0.052839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206556 | 0.043359 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047558 | 0.050519 | 0.107078 | 0.09503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049671 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042407 | 0 | 0.078979 | 0.049715 | 0 | 0.118711 | 0 | 0.103607 | 0 | 0.101945 | 0.041077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084149 | 0.114686 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039656 | 0 | 0.056882 | 0 | 0.113691 | 0.162951 | 0.112701 | 0 | 0 | 0.037336 | 0.079825 | 0.043403 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09897 | 0.095455 | 0 | 0.039422 | 0.028955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067428 | 0 | 0.048508 | 0.051695 | 0 | 0.042888 | 0 | 0.081945 | 0.117156 | 0.118247 | 0 | 0 | 0.089296 | 0 | 0.134424 | 0 | 0 | 0.047868 | 0 | 0.144604 | 0 | 0.050605 | 0.1411 | 0 | 0 | 0.063955 |
suicidewatch | 1600waid | 2018/12/25 | help... im 15 yrs old... and i suffer from really bad depression.. ive been in and out of mental hospitals for the last few months because of self harm.. and they have put me on meds but nothing works... death is constantly on my mind... i feel so alone in this world.. i have no one.. no one understands me... my girlfr... | 0.716742 | 3.24649 | 2.228674 | 91.784194 | 91.621951 | 6.022906 | 22.984093 | 7.423996 | 1.23544 | 647 | 26 | 134 | 13 | 23 | 209 | 104 | 164 | 0.135 | 0.784 | 0.081 | -0.8152 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 57 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 23 | 19 | 11 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 28 | 2 | 18 | 13 | 3 | 19 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 84 | 32 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092099 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219956 | 0.160586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.284678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141005 | 0 | 0.42683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107367 | 0 | 0 | 0.14311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146307 | 0 | 0.132739 | 0 | 0.265992 | 0 | 0.105135 | 0 | 0.096827 | 0.097666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126386 | 0 | 0.138214 | 0 | 0.178509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084381 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137409 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099034 | 0.105869 | 0 | 0.121267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168797 | 0 | 0.104568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089427 | 0 | 0 | 0.137122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095891 | 0 | 0 | 0.093568 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | klootzak477474 | 2018/12/25 | I want to die, this is my story I know more than anyone that life is not fair. I used to feel perfectly fine for so many years until my borderline mother ruined everything at age 11 and went gradually more apeshit as time moved on. It really is a horror story and very few people ever listened to me.
I'm 17 now and si... | 1.986656 | 3.912993 | 4.31609 | 83.53681 | 78.373602 | 7.582452 | 23.654117 | 8.482186 | 1.650975 | 1,705 | 57 | 343 | 36 | 41 | 593 | 216 | 447 | 0.158 | 0.745 | 0.097 | -0.9692 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 46 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 19 | 28 | 4 | 3 | 16 | 1 | 29 | 9 | 4 | 6 | 2 | 58 | 66 | 27 | 5 | 6 | 12 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 23 | 15 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 13 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 3 | 64 | 15 | 45 | 50 | 11 | 45 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 29 | 11 | 2 | 6 | 28 | 227 | 87 | 0 | 0 | 0.160935 | 0.132549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134705 | 0.047487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063808 | 0 | 0.056706 | 0.0414 | 0 | 0.05779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071207 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043799 | 0 | 0.058494 | 0 | 0.070484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0695 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060152 | 0.140347 | 0 | 0 | 0.061432 | 0 | 0 | 0.122074 | 0 | 0.064024 | 0 | 0.034339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062786 | 0.035482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054317 | 0 | 0.074815 | 0 | 0 | 0.216888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060365 | 0.150274 | 0 | 0.074648 | 0.110718 | 0 | 0 | 0.073789 | 0 | 0.14391 | 0.066359 | 0 | 0 | 0.060102 | 0 | 0 | 0.074136 | 0 | 0.061295 | 0 | 0 | 0.068854 | 0 | 0.073979 | 0 | 0 | 0.136883 | 0 | 0.068574 | 0.07954 | 0.108417 | 0.072182 | 0.149774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051652 | 0 | 0 | 0.075411 | 0 | 0 | 0.094166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304553 | 0 | 0 | 0.072915 | 0 | 0.057998 | 0 | 0.054008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.532171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054587 | 0 | 0.062526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039601 | 0 | 0.064375 | 0 | 0 | 0.046109 | 0 | 0.066342 | 0.141402 | 0.081693 | 0.117312 | 0 | 0.112073 | 0.040058 | 0.053907 | 0 | 0 | 0.061063 | 0.062957 | 0.061282 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048244 | 0 | 0 | 0.218673 |
suicidewatch | DeathPeanut | 2018/12/25 | Why i cant understand my courses İ think iam too stupid for college and any other subjects... | 6.933333 | 6.728179 | 7.163333 | 75.765 | 64.555556 | 9.422222 | 40.222222 | 8.841846 | 3.730156 | 74 | 4 | 13 | 1 | 1 | 24 | 18 | 18 | 0.195 | 0.805 | 0 | -0.5267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.408519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.384926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.625385 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.542068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | timmypotter1 | 2018/12/25 | Secret Selflessness I am alive
Not by choice, but selflessness
For others breathing is thoughtless
For me, it's a forced chore
The reason? Not sure.
No single event, no single person
I feel no desperation, only emptyness
I do not desire pitty or a savior
Only to be erased, deleted
For them to all forget
A drastic actio... | 3.035324 | 5.721338 | 4.581615 | 78.986818 | 78.911504 | 7.30649 | 22.691003 | 8.3441 | 1.818493 | 474 | 15 | 80 | 10 | 12 | 158 | 73 | 113 | 0.357 | 0.529 | 0.114 | -0.9898 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 20 | 9 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 3 | 12 | 8 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 61 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134309 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.594337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.354616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.404042 | 0.282646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | kitafi | 2018/12/25 | There's probably a more miserable way to spend Christmas than staring at the gift bags you prepared for kids who never showed up because you called their mother on stealing from you. I'm going to my aunt's later, but I feel pretty miserable right now. And when I come back, the bags will still be there and all the gifts... | 9.089657 | 6.845621 | 8 | 78.078333 | 61.5 | 10.831373 | 35.901961 | 8.841846 | 2.888396 | 277 | 9 | 54 | 3 | 3 | 85 | 53 | 68 | 0.128 | 0.767 | 0.105 | -0.3891 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 2 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 38 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269917 | 0 | 0.213982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.358436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.302377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177489 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.357119 | 0.378465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.280329 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.278628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | CDH17 | 2018/12/25 | Love you all very much Never thought I would be on the posting side, been a really tough year and I cant think of anyone I have not let down. Was trying to be this sub IRL, but got punched in the eye. Overall, you are always my favorites, I know at a certain point its time. GG, thats all folks/ | 1.840952 | 3.037129 | 3.184317 | 94.674571 | 76.777778 | 5.674921 | 22.12381 | 5.683918 | 0.023149 | 227 | 6 | 53 | 1 | 5 | 74 | 55 | 63 | 0.022 | 0.778 | 0.2 | 0.9091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 11 | 14 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 6 | 6 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 36 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.311423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223879 | 0 | 0.234887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287898 | 0 | 0.291674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195143 | 0 | 0.241778 | 0.177585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216343 | 0 | 0 | 0.19612 |
suicidewatch | ohhhhh_sookie | 2018/12/25 | I think my dog is dying and I want to slit my wrists everytime i hear him struggle to breathe I have kind of resolved that when my service dog guess, I go too. I just didn't think it would happen so soon or on fucking Christmas.
I'm struggling to get by. I've become non-functioning. I have racked up serious debt.
Las... | 1.684025 | 3.922547 | 3.127158 | 90.071843 | 80.970803 | 5.666111 | 23.654327 | 6.86897 | 0.829566 | 530 | 19 | 108 | 6 | 14 | 173 | 96 | 137 | 0.118 | 0.822 | 0.06 | -0.8611 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 13 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 27 | 8 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 16 | 3 | 16 | 22 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 10 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 65 | 21 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.376768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177816 | 0 | 0.185735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167808 | 0.094834 | 0 | 0.103159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199959 | 0 | 0.160513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18902 | 0 | 0.147959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128209 | 0 | 0.181926 | 0.160281 | 0 | 0.152427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17034 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144348 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.379518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.232615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149769 | 0.214125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128943 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | HighGroundHighlander | 2018/12/25 | Adult with mild Autism. Social security battle is takimg too lomg and I can't "cowboy up" like all my family and friends in Idaho suggest. I have a son. I love him. His mother and I seperated years ago. I can't stand how helpless I am. I survived being raped as a child and as an adult. I have no sense of identity to s... | 2.105747 | 4.077135 | 3.946601 | 86.112251 | 78.181586 | 7.106593 | 23.648835 | 8.076483 | 1.309699 | 1,503 | 50 | 314 | 27 | 36 | 507 | 191 | 391 | 0.13 | 0.76 | 0.11 | -0.6807 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 38 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 19 | 24 | 5 | 3 | 16 | 0 | 41 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 46 | 64 | 26 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 9 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 15 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 54 | 10 | 45 | 52 | 6 | 38 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 32 | 21 | 1 | 7 | 11 | 213 | 60 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092991 | 0 | 0 | 0.108649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083758 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092914 | 0 | 0 | 0.207865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098895 | 0 | 0.106086 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081049 | 0.096982 | 0.109616 | 0.100634 | 0 | 0.087989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107662 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210946 | 0 | 0.105228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.345916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051251 | 0 | 0.092632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154234 | 0.077785 | 0 | 0.101317 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142172 | 0.079785 | 0.334877 | 0 | 0.232968 | 0.113601 | 0 | 0.145455 | 0 | 0.109603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179176 | 0 | 0 | 0.105028 | 0 | 0.083595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213874 | 0.088885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076372 | 0 | 0.106907 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067555 |
suicidewatch | muddledmirth | 2018/12/25 | There is no way to fix myself. I don't even want to get better, and I have every reason to be happy and grateful. I have a loving family and group of friends. I'm always able to find money some way or another. I don't have any responsibilities and am free to go wherever I want and try anything I want.
But the one thin... | 1.677823 | 3.245119 | 3.704323 | 89.209819 | 78.086022 | 6.872222 | 20.764785 | 7.720077 | 0.615851 | 2,049 | 51 | 463 | 31 | 48 | 698 | 222 | 558 | 0.168 | 0.604 | 0.229 | 0.9961 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 67 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 36 | 44 | 3 | 0 | 14 | 1 | 52 | 17 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 100 | 115 | 52 | 7 | 24 | 31 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 23 | 26 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 27 | 10 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 83 | 35 | 48 | 94 | 10 | 44 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 13 | 40 | 20 | 1 | 14 | 13 | 306 | 106 | 3 | 0.051832 | 0 | 0.050581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057198 | 0 | 0.086258 | 0 | 0 | 0.105744 | 0.054351 | 0 | 0 | 0.102808 | 0.072485 | 0 | 0.042654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048698 | 0 | 0.043278 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058397 | 0 | 0.137525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105693 | 0 | 0 | 0.089298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082768 | 0 | 0.056936 | 0.033428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053557 | 0 | 0.102705 | 0.046885 | 0.131013 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097726 | 0 | 0.052416 | 0.037029 | 0 | 0 | 0.094748 | 0.088177 | 0 | 0.056832 | 0.28032 | 0.047918 | 0.135402 | 0.049722 | 0.147288 | 0.043475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051992 | 0.051481 | 0 | 0 | 0.110976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102872 | 0.092142 | 0.11469 | 0 | 0.056972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053002 | 0.073222 | 0.025323 | 0.05195 | 0.045769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.514589 | 0 | 0 | 0.05255 | 0.052073 | 0 | 0 | 0.052216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05613 | 0 | 0.035934 | 0 | 0.108308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166026 | 0.053292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044265 | 0 | 0.082439 | 0 | 0 | 0.082608 | 0 | 0.108145 | 0 | 0 | 0.042876 | 0 | 0.05187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056696 | 0 | 0.048852 | 0 | 0.038972 | 0 | 0.135912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06887 | 0.066424 | 0.10185 | 0 | 0.030224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.397438 | 0.123427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11921 | 0.049965 | 0 | 0.037735 | 0 | 0 | 0.03682 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
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