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Now, sirs. By 'r lady, you fought fair. So did you, Peto. So did you, Bardolph. You are lions too. You ran away upon instinct. You will not touch the true Prince. No, fie!
Now, sirs, it must be said that you fought well. So did you, Peto. So did you, Bardolph. You are brave lions as well, and you only ran away because your instinct told you it was necessary. You will not attack a true Prince. No, that's for sure!
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Faith, I ran when I saw others run.
Truthfully, I only ran away when I saw the others running.
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Faith, tell me now in earnest, how came Falstaffs sword so hacked?
Okay, tell me the truth now. How did Falstaff's sword get so cut up?
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Why, he hacked it with his dagger and said he would swear truth out of England but he would make you believe it was done in fight, and persuaded us to do the like.
Well, he hacked at it with his dagger, and then said that he would lie so convincingly and make you believe that he had done it fighting. And he persuaded us to say the same.
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Yea, and to tickle our noses with speargrass to make them bleed, and then to beslubber our garments with it, and swear it was the blood of true men. I did that I did not this seven year before: I blushed to hear his monstrous devices.
Yes, and he made us rub our noses with some sharp blades of grass to make them bleed, and then to smear this blood all over our clothes and say that it was the blood of the men we had fought. When he told us to tell this outrageous lie, I did something that I haven't done in seven years I blushed.
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My lord, do you see these meteors? Do you behold these exhalations?
My lord, do you see these red lumps? Can you see these rashes on my face?
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I do.
I can.
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Choler, my lord, if rightly taken.
Anger, my lord, if I understand them correctly.
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My own knee? When I was about thy years, Hal, I was not an eagles talon in the waist. I could have crept into any aldermans thumb-ring.
My own knee? When I was about your age, Hal, my waist was as thin as an eagle's claw. I could have got through any councilman's sealing ring.
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A plague of sighing and grief! It blows a man up like a bladder.
To hell with sighing and sadness! It makes a man blow up like an inflatable.
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Theres villanous news abroad. Here was Sir John Bracy from your father. You must to the court in the morning.
There's terrible news going around. That was Sir John Bracy, and he was sent here by your father. You must go to court in the morning.
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That same mad fellow of the north, Percy, and he of Wales that gave Amamon the bastinado, and made Lucifer cuckold, and swore the devil his true liegeman upon the cross of a Welsh hook what a plague call you him?
Hotspur, that crazy fellow from the north, and that Welshman who beat up Amamon , seduced the devil's wife, and caused the devil to swear to be his loyal servant by threatening him with a hooked sword ...what the devil is his name again?
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Owen Glendower.
Owen Glendower.
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Owen, Owen, the same, and his son-in-law Mortimer, and old Northumberland, and that sprightly Scot of Scots, Douglas, that runs a-horseback up a hill perpendicular
Owen, Owen, that's it. There's also his son-in-law Mortimer, old Northumberland, and that wonderful, energetic Scotsman, Douglas, who could probably ride a horse up a wall.
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He that rides at high speed, and with his pistol kills a sparrow flying.
He rides so quickly, and then tries to kill a flying sparrow with his pistol.
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You have hit it.
You've got it exactly right.
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Well, that rascal hath good mettle in him. He will not run.
Well, that rascal has a lot of courage in him. He won't run away.
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Why, what a rascal art thou then to praise him so for running?
Why, you're a rascal! You just gave him praise for running!
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A-horseback, you cuckoo, but afoot he will not budge a foot.
I praised him for running on horseback, you simpleton, but when he's fighting on foot he won't move a muscle.
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Yes, Jack, upon instinct.
Yes he will, Jack his instinct will tell him to.
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I grant you, upon instinct.
I'll give you that, he'll move if his instinct tells him to.
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Well, he is there too, and one Mordake, and a thousand blue-caps more:
Well, he's there too, and so is a man called Mordake and about a thousand more Scottish soldiers .
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Worcester is stolen away tonight.
Worcester has left London tonight,
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Thy fathers beard is turned white with the news. You may buy land now as cheap as stinking mackerel.
and your father's beard turned white when he heard the news. Land is becoming as cheap as some stinking fish.
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By the Mass, thou sayest true. It is like we shall have good trading that way.
I swear, you speak the truth. We'll have some good luck if it's like that.
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But tell me, Hal, art not thou horrible afeard? Thou being heir apparent, could the world pick thee out three such enemies again as that fiend Douglas, that spirit Percy, and that devil Glendower?
But, Hal, tell me are you very scared? Since you are the heir to the throne, you are going to be the prime target of that wicked Douglas, that lively Percy, and that devil Glendower?
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Art thou not horribly afraid? Doth not thy blood thrill at it?
Are you not horribly afraid? Don't you shudder with fear at the thought of it?
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Not a whit, i' faith; I lack some of thy instinct.
Not at all, truthfully. I must lack some of your instinct.
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Well, thou wert be horribly chid tomorrow when thou comest to thy father. If thou love me, practice an answer.
Well, you are going to be scolded horribly tomorrow when you see your father. I beg you, let's practice what you will say to him.
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Do thou stand for my father and examine me upon the particulars of my life.
You can pretend to be my father, and ask me about what's happening in my life.
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Shall I? Content. This chair shall be my state, this dagger my scepter, and this cushion my crown.
Should I? All right then. This chair will be my throne, this dagger will be my scepter, and this cushion will be my crown.
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Well, here is my leg.
Well then, I make my bow to you.
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And here is my speech. Stand aside, nobility.
And here is my speech for you. Stand aside, noblemen.
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O Jesu, this is excellent sport, i' faith!
Oh Jesus, this is an excellent game, really!
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Weep not, sweet queen, for trickling tears are vain.
Don't cry, my sweet Queen, your falling tears are pointless.
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O the father, how he holds his countenance!
Oh look at the father he's really good at keeping a straight face.
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For Gods sake, lords, convey my tristful queen, For tears do stop the floodgates of her eyes.
For God's sake, lords, take my sad queen away from here. The floodgates of her eyes are now filled up with her tears.
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O Jesu, he doth it as like one of these harlotry players as ever I see.
Oh Jesus, he's so much like one of those silly real actors!
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Peace, good pint-pot. Peace, good tickle-brain.
Enough, good pint of ale. Enough, good liquor-brain.
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What manner of man, an it like your Majesty?
What type of man is he, your Majesty?
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A goodly portly man, i' faith, and a corpulent;
A handsome, dignified man, indeed, and quite overweight.
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of a cheerful look, a pleasing eye, and a most noble carriage,
He always looks cheerful, is quite attractive, and has a very noble demeanor about him.
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and, as I think, his age some fifty, or, by 'r Lady, inclining to three score; and now I remember me, his name is Falstaff.
I would say that he is about fifty, or, my goodness, possibly closer to sixty. I remember now his name is Falstaff.
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If that man should be lewdly given, he deceiveth me, for, Harry, I see virtue in his looks. If then the tree may be known by the fruit, as the fruit by the tree, then peremptorily I speak it: there is virtue in that Falstaff;
If that man is at all inclined to wickedness, then he has deceived me, Harry, because I see goodness in his character. If a tree is known by its fruit , and the fruit by its tree, then I can positively say that there is a lot of goodness in that Falstaff.
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him keep with, the rest banish. And tell me now, thou naughty varlet, tell me, where hast thou been this month?
Keep him in your company, and get rid of the rest. Tell me now, you naughty boy, tell me where have you been this last month?
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Dost thou speak like a king? Do thou stand for me, and Ill play my father.
Is that what a king would say? You pretend to be me, and I'll play my father.
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Depose me? If thou dost it half so gravely, so majestically, both in word and matter, hang me up by the heels for a rabbit-sucker or a poulters hare.
You're going to take me off the throne? If you manage to do it even half as sincerely or majestically as I did, in both words and behavior, then hang me up like some baby rabbit for sale in a poultry shop.
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Well, here I am set.
Well, I'm seated and ready.
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And here I stand. Judge, my masters.
And I'll stand here.
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Now, Harry, whence come you?
Now, Harry, where have you come from?
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My noble lord, from Eastcheap.
My noble lord, I have come from Eastcheap.
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The complaints I hear of thee are grievous.
I have heard some very serious complaints about you.
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Sblood, my lord, they are false. Nay, Ill tickle you for a young prince, i' faith.
Damn it, my lord, they're all lies.
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Swearest thou? Ungracious boy, henceforth ne'er look on me.
Did you just swear? You rude boy, never look at me again.
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Thou art violently carried away from grace. There is a devil haunts thee in the likeness of an old fat man.
You have been forcefully turned away from goodness. There is a devil that haunts you and it looks very much like an old, fat man.
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A tun of man is thy companion. Why dost thou converse with that trunk of humors, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloakbag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with the pudding in his belly, that reverend Vice, that gray iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years?
A ton of man is your companion. Why do you associate yourself with that container of diseases, that sifting bin of beastliness, that swollen crate of disease, that huge case of wine, that stuffed suitcase of stomach, that roasted ox stuffed with pudding, that reverend Vice , that grey-haired sinner, that elderly swaggerer, that man who has aged with vanity?
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Wherein is he good, but to taste sack and drink it? Wherein neat and cleanly but to carve a capon and eat it?
What is he good for, except to taste wine and then drink it? What is he skilled at besides carving a chicken and eating it?
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Wherein cunning but in craft? Wherein crafty but in villany? Wherein villanous but in all things? Wherein worthy but in nothing?
What is he smart about besides scheming? What does he scheme about besides dirty tricks? Why is he wicked in all respects? Is he really worth anything?
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I would your Grace would take me with you. Whom means your Grace?
I wish your Grace would explain what you mean a bit better. Who are you talking about, your Grace?
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That villanous abominable misleader of youth, Falstaff, that old white-bearded Satan.
That evil, horrific corrupter of youth Falstaff, that old, white-bearded devil.
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My lord, the man I know.
My lord, I know the man.
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I know thou dost.
I know you do.
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But to say I know more harm in him than in myself were to say more than I know. That he is old, the more the pity; his white hairs do witness it. But that he is, saving your reverence, a whoremaster, that I utterly deny.
For me to say that he is worse than I am, would be more than I am able to say. He is old, that's true, and it's a shame his white hairs prove his age. But to say that he's a forgive me a pimp, that I completely deny.
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If sack and sugar be a fault, God help the wicked. If to be old and merry be a sin, then many an old host that I know is damned. If to be fat be to be hated, then Pharaohs lean kine are to be loved.
If drinking sweet wine is a sin, then God help us all. If being old and cheerful is a sin, then most old innkeepers I know are damned. If it is bad to be fat, then we should all love Pharaoh's lean cows .
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No, my good lord, banish Peto, banish Bardolph, banish Poins, but for sweet Jack Falstaff, kind Jack Falstaff, true Jack Falstaff, valiant Jack Falstaff, and therefore more valiant being, as he is old Jack Falstaff,
No, my good lord, banish Peto, banish Bardolph, banish Poins. As for sweet Jack Falstaff, kind Jack Falstaff, honest Jack Falstaff, brave Jack Falstaff and he is made more brave, since he is old Jack Falstaff
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banish not him thy Harrys company, banish not him thy Harrys company. Banish plump Jack, and banish all the world.
don't banish him from Harry's company. Don't get rid of him. If you get rid of plump Jack, you'll be getting rid of the entire world.
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O, my lord, my lord, the Sheriff with a most monstrous watch is at the door.
Oh my lord, my lord, the Sheriff is at the door with an unusually large group of officers.
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Out, you rogue. Play out the play. I have much to say in the behalf of that Falstaff.
Get out, you idiot. We need to finish our play. I still have a lot to say on behalf of that Falstaff.
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O Jesu, my lord, my lord
Oh Jesus, my lord, my lord
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Heigh, heigh, the devil rides upon a fiddlestick. Whats the matter?
Hey, hey! What a lot of commotion. What's the matter?
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The Sheriff and all the watch are at the door. They are come to search the house. Shall I let them in?
The Sheriff and a group of officers are at the door. They have come to search the bar. Should I let them in?
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Dost thou hear, Hal? Never call a true piece of gold a counterfeit. Thou art essentially made, without seeming so.
Did you hear that, Hal? Never call a real piece of gold a fake you are true and loyal, even if your recent behavior doesn't show it.
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And thou a natural coward without instinct.
And you are an born coward, with no instinct.
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I deny your major. If you will deny the Sheriff, so; if not, let him enter. If I become not a cart as well as another man, a plague on my bringing up. I hope I shall as soon be strangled with a halter as another.
I reject your logic. If you are going to reject the Sheriff, then do it. If not, then let him come in. If I'm not as impressive on the hangman's cart as the next man, then a curse on my upbringing. I'm as willing to be hanged as any other man.
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Both which I have had, but their date is out; and therefore Ill hide me.
I've had both of those, but their lease has expired, and so I think I'll hide.
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Call in the Sheriff.
Call in the Sheriff.
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What men?
What men?
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One of them is well known, my gracious lord, A gross fat man.
One of them is very well known, my gracious lord. He is a large, fat man.
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As fat as butter.
As fat as butter.
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The man, I do assure you is not here, For I myself at this time have employed him.
I can assure you that that man isn't here, because I have just sent him on an errand.
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And, Sheriff, I will engage my word to thee That I will by tomorrow dinner time Send him to answer thee
And, Sheriff, I give you my word that I will send him to appear before you by midday tomorrow
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or any man For any thing he shall be charged withal.
with any other man that you need. He will answer to anything that he has been accused of.
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And so let me entreat you leave the house.
Now, will you please leave this bar?
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It may be so. If he have robbed these men, He shall be answerable; and so farewell.
I'm sure that's true. If he has robbed these men, then he will be held responsible for it. And so, take care.
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Good night, my noble lord.
Good night, my noble lord.
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I think it is good morrow, is it not?
I think it's good morning by now, isn't it?
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Indeed, my lord, I think it be two o'clock.
Indeed it is, my lord. It is two o'clock in the morning by now.
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This oily rascal is known as well as Pauls. Go call him forth.
This shifty rascal is as famous as St. Paul's Cathedral. Go and get him.
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Falstaff! Fast asleep behind the arras, and snorting like a horse.
Falstaff! He is fast asleep behind here, and snoring like a horse.
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Hark, how hard he fetches breath. Search his pockets.
God, listen to how heavy his breathing is. Search his pockets.
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Nothing but papers, my lord.
Just some papers, my lord.
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Lets see what they be. Read them.
Let's see what they say. Read them.
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(reads) Item, a capon, ¦ 2s. 2d. Item, sauce, ¦ 4d. Item, sack, two gallons, ¦ 5s. 8d. Item, anchovies and sack after supper, , , , 2s. 6d. Item, bread, ob.
"Item One: A chicken 2 shillings, 2 pence. Item Two: Sauce 4 pence.Item Three: Wine, two gallons 5 shillings, 8 pence.Item Four: Anchovies and wine after dinner 2 shillings, 6 pence.Item Five: Bread half a penny."
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O monstrous! But one halfpennyworth of bread to this intolerable deal of sack!
Oh, how horrid! Just half a penny's worth of bread compared to this ridiculous amount of wine!
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What there is else, keep close. Well read it at more advantage. There let him sleep till day. Ill to the court in the morning.
Hold tight to everything else you found; we'll look at it when we have more time. Let him sleep there until the morning, and then I'll go to court.
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We must all to the wars, and thy place shall be honorable. Ill procure this fat rogue a charge of foot, and I know his death will be a march of twelve score.
We're all going to have to fight in these wars, and you will all have honorable positions. I'm going to put this fat idiot in charge of some foot soldiers, and I bet he'll be dead before they've traveled even two hundred and forty yards.
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The money shall be paid back again with advantage. Be with me betimes in the morning, and so good morrow, Peto.
I will pay back the money that was robbed with interest. Meet me early in the morning and with that, good morning, Peto.
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Good morrow, good my lord.
Good morning, my good lord.
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These promises are fair, the parties sure, And our induction full of prosperous hope.
These offers of support are good, our allies are reliable, and the beginning of our mission seems very hopeful.
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Lord Mortimer and cousin Glendower, Will you sit down? And Uncle Worcester A plague upon it, I have forgot the map.
Lord Mortimer and cousin Glendower, won't you sit down? And Uncle Worcester oh damn it! I forgot to bring the map.