bpben/friends_script · Datasets at Hugging Face

conversations listlengths 1 62
[ { "content": "A spoon. Your hands. Your face!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Paper, snow, a ghost!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "A rock, a dog, the earth.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Salami, anchovies, jam!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Paper, snow, a ghost!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Chickens?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Ketchup!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Relish!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Yeah...", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, so we didn't win, but it's fun to play the game, right?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, wow! I'm so sorry, ok? I promise, we'll do better next time!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Hey, you know, some of those are pretty hard! Like why would there be a ghost in my fridge? (pause). Yeah!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "So, Saturday night!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Great!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, well, uh, this is gonna sound kinda silly, but, do you remember my roommate Chandler Bing?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "It's been sixteen years but the air quotes still hurt.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Yeah, why?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "You did?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(angrily) AND ON MY TURF?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(to Rachel) Hey, where is this guy, it's been over an hour!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, he's coming from Jersey, he said he would get here as fast as he could!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Who is it?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(pretends to be shocked) Uh! The police!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(Excited, running back to her seat) Oh!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "What's the matter, officer? Has someone been bad? (looks over to Phoebe and she opens the door, and to their dismay, the stripper is an old, short, fat guy who looks exhausted)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Are you gonna be ok, officer, uhm,...", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "...If-you-say-so.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, God!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Are you kidding?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "All right, look, we did not know that you wanted a stripper so we went to the phonebook and we got the first name we could find!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "How old is your phonebook?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God, this man is gonna get naked in my apartment!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh God no, I don't wanna see him take his clothes off!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, no! I mean, obviously we want to see you take your clothes off! You big piece of eye candy!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "This is how I look when I'm turned on!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Shocking!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Three hundred dollars, are you kidding?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, that's ok, let's me just get my check book!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, you're not gonna pay him, he didn't do anything!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "I don't care. We're not paying you 300 dollars for this.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh yeah, okay. I'm uptight. Yeah, that's why I don't want to watch a middle aged guy dance around in what I can only assume is a child halloween costume! (turns to look at Monica and Rachel who look like they feel very sorry for the stripper)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "I'm sorry, did you say all man or old man?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(walks towards Phoebe and the stripper) Uh, look, officer... uhm Sir...", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(To Henrietta) My friend Rachel has a kid. I totally know nursery rhymes! (makes a thumbs up sign)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, .. uh... uh... pass. (Next word", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, then pass. (Next word", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(To Chandler) You made out with Missy Goldberg. How could you do that, after you promised me?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(to the two guys) Excuse me. (Chandler and Ross move away from them). That didn't make us sound gay at all!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You broke the pact!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ross, that was 16 years ago!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "That doesn't matter! We're talking about the foundation of our friendship.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I believe the foundation of our friendship was unfortunate hair. (Ross just stares at him) All right, look, if we're really gonna do this... it's not like you never broke one of the pacts.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I didn't.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh really?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh really!?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "NO!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "ADRIENNE TURNER!! (A girl behind them turns around)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I never did anything with Adrienne Turner.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh please, and you knew how much I liked her.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I don't know what... you're talking about.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Really?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I can't believe we are at a real college party! (Rachel laughs excitedly) I have to pee so bad!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "This is so awesome! College guys are so cute!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey, you've got a boyfriend!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know. But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! (They spot Chandler)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Look, there's Chandler. You knew, that stupid friend of Ross'. Said I'm fat. You know I've already lost 4 pounds!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "It... You can so totally tell.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I KNOW!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well lets see. Maybe he knows where Ross is. (They walk towards Chandler) Hey, how's it going (tries to look as un-interested in him as possible - checking out her nails).", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Aren't you...?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, Rachel. And this (points to Monica) is Ross' sister, Monica. We met at Thanksgiving. (looks around the room as if searching for something more interesting to do).", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(smiling at Monica) Right. (to Rachel) So how're you doing?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Bitchin'", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hi Monica.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hi Chandler. It's really nice to see you (rolls her eyes) NOT. (she and Rachel giggle a little and Chandler looks unimpressed)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "O-kay. I'll see if I can find Ross. (Goes off to find Ross.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God Rach. Bean bag chairs.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Do NOT let me sit in one of those. We'll be here for days.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Listen Adrienne, you can't tell Chandler about this.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Cool! (They start kissing again and Chandler looks shocked)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I didn't know you knew about that.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, I did and it hurt. (they walk towards the bar) That's when I wrote the song", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(looks disappointed in himself) Man... I... I'm sorry.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Look (hands him a drink) it was a lo-o-ong time ago.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So, eh. I made out with Adrienne and you made out with Missy. Well I guess we're even.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(smiling a little nervously) Hmm mmmhm..", "role": "user" }, { "content": "We are even, right?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(sighs) Just one more thing. I was so pissed at you that night that I wanted to get back at you. So I thought, who does Ross like the more than anybody?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(thinks about it for a few seconds) What did you do to my mom?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Not her!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I am sooo drunk.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "That's weird. I've had the same number of beers as you and I don't feel anything at all. (Chandler approaches)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Soo... you girls having fun?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "For your information, ass munch, I've lost four pounds. Maybe even five with all the dancing. (A guy enters holding a pizza box)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh THATS ME! (she runs to the pizza guy)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(finishing the last of her drink) I am soo not going to do good on my SATs tomorrow.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well maybe if you go to school here next year we can totally hang out.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(sarcastic) Oh yeah. There is a plan! Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, maybe you can get in on a beauty scholarship.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(blushing) Oh, what a line. (walks towards the drinks table with her back towards Chandler and whispers \"Oh my God!\")", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So where are you applying to?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of... (Chandler leans in an kisses her) (She pulls away) Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I'm in college and I'm in a band.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(She considers it for a second) Yeah okay. (She puts her hands around his neck and they start kissing again)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "You know, it's fine. We'll pay you.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "No, wait. No there's gotta be something else that you can do. I mean, what skills do you have?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "So maybe something in an office.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Or you could teach stripping. You know, share your gift, pass the torch.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "There you go. Okay, do you think you're gonna be okay?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(after a pause) Finish it!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Your last dance. Do it for us.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(to Phoebe) Really?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, yeah. He deserves to do the thing he loves one last time.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh this is so ho-o-ot!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh no, no, no, don't stop!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(nervously) Yeah...", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I-I-I don't know. Types of trees?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(sympathetic) Oh, I'm so sorry. I don't know any Spanish words.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Things that go \"tssst\" when you put them out.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Things that burn.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Dude, dude! I think you're losing it.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, oh, oh... What a dog says.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(instantly) Pizza toppings, next!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, oh, oh... (5 seconds left)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Girls Chandler could never get?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Where? (looking around)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Hey, where's Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "She and Phoebe took the stripper to the hospital.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Did you know Chandler kissed Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What? When was this?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Nineteen Eighty Seven. The weekend you guys visited me at school.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God! That's wild!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, but it was like a million years ago, so it doesn't matter.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, it matters to me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Why?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Because... the night you kissed Rachel was the night I kissed Rachel for the very first time.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You kissed her that night too?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Seriously, where did this happen?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, after you told me she was passed out in our room, I went in there to make sure she was all right. She was lying on my bed, all buried in peoples coats. Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know. But it was so dark, I accidentally got her lips. I started to pull away, but then I felt her start to kiss me back. It was only for a second, but... it was amazing. And now, now I find out that you kissed her first.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh wait... What bed did you say she was on?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Mine.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, she was definitely on my bed.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Why would I kiss a girl, and then put her on your bed?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, then who was on my bed?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(screeching) OH! Oh, oh! (holding her hand in front of her mouth)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(realizing) NO! No, no!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "YES! (Chandler gets an \"oh no!\" look on his face)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You were under the pile of coats?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I was the pile of coats!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "OH MY GOD!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You were my Midnight Mystery Kisser?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You were my first kiss with Rachel?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You were my first kiss ever?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What did I marry into?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, crap!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, hey Joey.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh, hey.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Listen, I need to ask you something. Ok, you know how my step dad's in prison.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(afraid) Yeah.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah. Well, uhm... listen he was supposed to get a weekend furlough, so he'd come to the wedding tomorrow, but he just called and... uhm... well, apparently stabbing Iceman in the exercise yard just couldn't wait till Monday.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So he can't come?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, and so there's no one to walk me down the aisle and... well, I would just really love it if you would do it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Seriously?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, you've... you know, sort of been like a dad to me. I mean, you've always, you know, looked out for me and shared your wisdom...", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I am pretty wisdomous.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So... what do you say?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Are you kidding? Phoebe, I would be honored. (they hug)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, thank you. I hope... I hope you know how much you mean to me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(takes her hand) Listen, I hope... that you know... (has difficulty saying it) I don't want you to see your father cry, GO TO YOUR ROOM!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh no, no, no, let your dad get this.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(her mobile phone rings) Oh, it's my wedding planner. She's driving me crazy! (she answers) Hello... Hey, ok, stop screaming! Ok? So, halibut. All right, so salmon, either way. I don't-I don't... it doesn't matter to me!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(she enters with a headset on and she's speaking into the microphone) Well, it matters to me!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, I don't care, so you pick!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Did you just hung up on me? (she hangs up too) All right, look, I need you at the rehearsal dinner tonight at 1800 hours.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-uh. Ok. What time is that.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You don't know military time?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Why, I must have been in missile training the day they taught that.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Just subtract twelve.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ok, so... 1800 minus twelve is... one thousand, seven hundred and...", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(screaming) Six o'clock!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ok.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ok. Hold on. (her mobile phone rings) Geller here! No! I said it has to be there by 4 o'clock. Goodbye. (she hangs up) Oh, how hard it is to make an ice sculpture?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ice sculpture? That sounds really fancy! I told you I just want a simple wedding.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Please... honey, leave the details to me. Now I wanna make this day as special for you as I can. Now, ok, I was thinking that the harpist should wear white.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What harpist? My friend Marjorie is playing the steel drums.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ooh... she backed out.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "She did? Why?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I made her. (Phoebe looks shocked) Steel drums don't really say \"elegant wedding\". Nor does Marjorie's overwhelming scent.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(looking angry) Hey! She will shower when Tibet is free.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You look great. I'm so glad we're having this rehearsal dinner, you know, I so rarely get to practice my meals before I eat them.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, what did we say was your one gift to us?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No stupid jokes. I thought that was for the actual wedding.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Rehearse it!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hi! (he kisses Phoebe)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, (he goes towards Mike in order to shake hands but Mike hugs him) hey, oh... I... I was-I was going for a hand shake.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "That is why!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "So Rach.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Where is Emma?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, Monica made me send her to my mother's. Apparently babies and weddings don't mix.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(coming) Are you still crying about your damn baby? Pheebs, you gotta keep the line moving, remember, 20 seconds per person. Your see these clowns all the time! (she takes off)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey, you're Mike's parents, right?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Ah, our little ones are growing up fast, uh?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "You know, on the one hand you're happy for them, but on the other hand it's hard to let go.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Hey, I'm not that fond of you either, ok buddy? But I'm just trying to be nice for the kids!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(to Rachel) You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, I thought we'd be groomsmen, but wouldn't they have asked us by now? When did they ask you to be their bridesmaid?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uh... November?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I wanna say it's not looking good.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey Pheebs...", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What's up?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uhm... you haven't told these guys what they're doing in the wedding yet.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Heh.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uhm... well, they're not in the wedding.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What? (Ross and Chandler don't know what to say, so there's an embarrassing long pause)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, this is really awkward (staring at the floor) Oh, and I can leave!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I'm sorry you guys but, you know, Mike's got his brother and his friends from school so... you know, you were-you were... if it helps you, you were next in line, you just-you just missed the cut.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, man!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "This is like figure skating team all over again. (Phoebe and Ross glare at him astonished) I mean synchronized swimming. (they continue to glare) I mean- I mean the balance beam. (to Ross) Help me!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "FOOTBALL!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thank you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(looking at Phoebe eating something) Pheebs, spit that out, that has pork in it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh! I though the pot stickers were supposed to be vegetarian!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, I changed them. I-I sent you a fax about it!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I don't have a fax machine.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ah, well then there are gonna be a few surprises!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I can't believe we're gonna be the only people that aren't in this wedding.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know, I hate being left out of things.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "And it's a wedding! It'd be weird if I'm not in it...", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Fine. We're just sitting here. Alone. Doing nothing. It's our rehearsal for tomorrow.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "What happened?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Who cares, AND?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I'll do it!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(standing up too) M-Me-me-me!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Pick me, I look great in a tux and I will not steal focus.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, Mike, no, no. You wanna pick me, I mean... watch! (he mimics the groommens way of walking down the aisle with a bridesmaid) Huh?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(to Chandler) Well, if Phoebe's choosing, then say hello to Mike's next groomsman.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I will. But I will need a mirror... as he is me!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Please, you're going down!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You are going downer!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Is that what they say on the Figure Skating Team?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(almost crying) I wouldn't know, I didn't make it! (they hug)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "So, you know I'm filling in for Phoebe's step dad, tomorrow, right?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, hey, my pleasure. (he suddenly becomes very serious) So what are your intentions with my Phoebe?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, a wiseacre. (Mike looks bewildered). No, no, no, I understand you plan to support your wife by playing the piano? Isn't that kind of unstable?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Strike two!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Strike three! You only get one more, Mike!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "So, what did you decide?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I decided to pee.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Mike didn't tell you? You have to chose one of us to be in your wedding. One of his groomsmen fell out.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh no, no. I can't choose between you two! I love you both so much!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Just not enough to put us in the original wedding party.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, I don't wanna choose! It's (Rachel is walking by). Oh okay, wait. Rach! Listen I have a very special bridesmaid task for you today.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(excited and clapping her hands in front of her face) Goody, what is it!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, there's a spot open for only one groomsman and you have to choose between Ross and Chandler. So good luck with that.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What, what, what, no, I don't wanna do that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right, I guess I'll have to find a new bridesmaid.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I'll do it! (Monica approaches)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ok, it's 2100 hours. (to Phoebe) Time for your toast. (Mike appears)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "You had a bathroom break at 2030. Pee on your own time, Mike! (to Phoebe and Mike). Now, in regard to the toast, okay, you wanna keep them short, nothing kills a rehearsal dinner like long speeches. Okay. You just get in, do your thing and get out!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(very serious) It's 2101 and I am not amused. (pause). Ok, the bride and groom have a few words they'd like to say. (Everyone sits and Phoebe gets up)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ok. Hello everyone and thank you all for being here tonight. So tomorrow's the big event and some of you might not know, but Mike and I didn't get off to the best start. (she reads a note). My friend Joey and I decided to fix each other up with friends so I, I... (Monica is twirling her hands in order to make Phoebe speed up her speech) oh I... hum... I gave it a lot of thought and I fixed him up with my friend Mary Ellen who couldn't be here tonight because... (Monica is tapping her watch with her finger) it's not important... she is in rehab. Anyway, so, ok, Joey said that he was fixing me up with his friend Mike, only he didn't have a friend Mike so he just brought, uhm, my Mike and, and (Monica clears her throat) but despite, you know... it got... it got good. Ok, I wanna take a moment to mention my mother, who couldn't be here...", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "And... moment's over! (Rachel, Joey and Chandler all turn and look disapprovingly towards Monica but she just shrugs it off) So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm... (she's flipping cards skipping half of them) Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I (Monica is miming CUT). Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS (she mimes Monica's when she was twirling her hands) OR THIS (she taps her watch) OR THIS (she mimes CUT) OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS! (pause) You know what? You're done.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "YOU'RE FIRED! (mimes the CUT again) (pause and she raises her glass) Cheers! (Chandler raises his, smiling and Monica stares at him and he puts down his glass.)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Happy wedding day!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, happy my wedding day to you!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, man! I wouldn't have had breakfast if I knew there was going to be corsages!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Hi. About last night... I know you are under a lot of stress and even though the things you said hurt me a little bit... My point is, uh, well, I'm willing to take my job back.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, well that's ok. I think you and I will do much better if you're just... here as a bridesmaid.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, is that so? Ok. If that's really what you want, then here... I give you the headset. Well, I don't really want to give you the headset. Well I guess if you're taking over, you should probably return these messages. (hands her a stack of papers with messages and calls to return)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Wow, this is a lot!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-huh, but I'm sure you can handle this. I mean, I have won awards for my organizational skills, but, uh, I'm sure you'll do fine.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You won awards?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Mm-mh. I printed them out on my computer.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hi.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Where's Rach?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "She's in her room, why?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I have to talk to her about this groomsman situation, ok? I'm not gonna watch Chandler up there while I'm sitting in the seats like some chump! (he goes to Rachel's room, knocks the door and enters the room). (very fake gasp) Oh! My God! You're breathtaking!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What d'you want?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You haven't by any chance chosen a groomsman yet, have you?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, Ross, c'mon, please! Don't make this harder than it already is!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I'm not! I'm making it easier! Pick me!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, Chandler said that it's really important to him too!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Listen, listen. Whoever you pick is gonna walk down the aisle with you! Now, I promise I won't say a word, but if you pick Chandler he's gonna be whispering stupid jokes in your ear the whole time!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, you are the lesser of two evils!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(waving his fist in the air in triumph) YES, YES!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Sven I don't understand what you're saying! What is wrong with the flowers? Lorkins? What the hell are lorkins?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "A spoon. Your hands. Your face!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Paper, snow, a ghost!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "A rock, a dog, the earth.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Salami, anchovies, jam!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Paper, snow, a ghost!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Chickens?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Ketchup!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Relish!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Yeah...", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, so we didn't win, but it's fun to play the game, right?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, wow! I'm so sorry, ok? I promise, we'll do better next time!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Hey, you know, some of those are pretty hard! Like why would there be a ghost in my fridge? (pause). Yeah!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "So, Saturday night!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Great!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, well, uh, this is gonna sound kinda silly, but, do you remember my roommate Chandler Bing?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "It's been sixteen years but the air quotes still hurt.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Yeah, why?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "You did?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(angrily) AND ON MY TURF?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(to Rachel) Hey, where is this guy, it's been over an hour!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, he's coming from Jersey, he said he would get here as fast as he could!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Who is it?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(pretends to be shocked) Uh! The police!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(Excited, running back to her seat) Oh!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "What's the matter, officer? Has someone been bad? (looks over to Phoebe and she opens the door, and to their dismay, the stripper is an old, short, fat guy who looks exhausted)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Are you gonna be ok, officer, uhm,...", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "...If-you-say-so.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, God!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Are you kidding?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "All right, look, we did not know that you wanted a stripper so we went to the phonebook and we got the first name we could find!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "How old is your phonebook?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God, this man is gonna get naked in my apartment!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh God no, I don't wanna see him take his clothes off!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, no! I mean, obviously we want to see you take your clothes off! You big piece of eye candy!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "This is how I look when I'm turned on!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Shocking!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Three hundred dollars, are you kidding?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, that's ok, let's me just get my check book!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, you're not gonna pay him, he didn't do anything!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "I don't care. We're not paying you 300 dollars for this.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh yeah, okay. I'm uptight. Yeah, that's why I don't want to watch a middle aged guy dance around in what I can only assume is a child halloween costume! (turns to look at Monica and Rachel who look like they feel very sorry for the stripper)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "I'm sorry, did you say all man or old man?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(walks towards Phoebe and the stripper) Uh, look, officer... uhm Sir...", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(To Henrietta) My friend Rachel has a kid. I totally know nursery rhymes! (makes a thumbs up sign)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, .. uh... uh... pass. (Next word", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, then pass. (Next word", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(To Chandler) You made out with Missy Goldberg. How could you do that, after you promised me?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(to the two guys) Excuse me. (Chandler and Ross move away from them). That didn't make us sound gay at all!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You broke the pact!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ross, that was 16 years ago!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "That doesn't matter! We're talking about the foundation of our friendship.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I believe the foundation of our friendship was unfortunate hair. (Ross just stares at him) All right, look, if we're really gonna do this... it's not like you never broke one of the pacts.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I didn't.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh really?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh really!?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "NO!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "ADRIENNE TURNER!! (A girl behind them turns around)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I never did anything with Adrienne Turner.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh please, and you knew how much I liked her.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I don't know what... you're talking about.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Really?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I can't believe we are at a real college party! (Rachel laughs excitedly) I have to pee so bad!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "This is so awesome! College guys are so cute!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey, you've got a boyfriend!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know. But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! (They spot Chandler)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Look, there's Chandler. You knew, that stupid friend of Ross'. Said I'm fat. You know I've already lost 4 pounds!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "It... You can so totally tell.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I KNOW!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well lets see. Maybe he knows where Ross is. (They walk towards Chandler) Hey, how's it going (tries to look as un-interested in him as possible - checking out her nails).", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Aren't you...?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, Rachel. And this (points to Monica) is Ross' sister, Monica. We met at Thanksgiving. (looks around the room as if searching for something more interesting to do).", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(smiling at Monica) Right. (to Rachel) So how're you doing?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Bitchin'", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hi Monica.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hi Chandler. It's really nice to see you (rolls her eyes) NOT. (she and Rachel giggle a little and Chandler looks unimpressed)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "O-kay. I'll see if I can find Ross. (Goes off to find Ross.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God Rach. Bean bag chairs.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Do NOT let me sit in one of those. We'll be here for days.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Listen Adrienne, you can't tell Chandler about this.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Cool! (They start kissing again and Chandler looks shocked)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I didn't know you knew about that.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, I did and it hurt. (they walk towards the bar) That's when I wrote the song", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(looks disappointed in himself) Man... I... I'm sorry.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Look (hands him a drink) it was a lo-o-ong time ago.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So, eh. I made out with Adrienne and you made out with Missy. Well I guess we're even.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(smiling a little nervously) Hmm mmmhm..", "role": "user" }, { "content": "We are even, right?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(sighs) Just one more thing. I was so pissed at you that night that I wanted to get back at you. So I thought, who does Ross like the more than anybody?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(thinks about it for a few seconds) What did you do to my mom?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Not her!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I am sooo drunk.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "That's weird. I've had the same number of beers as you and I don't feel anything at all. (Chandler approaches)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Soo... you girls having fun?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "For your information, ass munch, I've lost four pounds. Maybe even five with all the dancing. (A guy enters holding a pizza box)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh THATS ME! (she runs to the pizza guy)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(finishing the last of her drink) I am soo not going to do good on my SATs tomorrow.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well maybe if you go to school here next year we can totally hang out.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(sarcastic) Oh yeah. There is a plan! Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, maybe you can get in on a beauty scholarship.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(blushing) Oh, what a line. (walks towards the drinks table with her back towards Chandler and whispers \"Oh my God!\")", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So where are you applying to?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of... (Chandler leans in an kisses her) (She pulls away) Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I'm in college and I'm in a band.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(She considers it for a second) Yeah okay. (She puts her hands around his neck and they start kissing again)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "You know, it's fine. We'll pay you.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "No, wait. No there's gotta be something else that you can do. I mean, what skills do you have?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "So maybe something in an office.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Or you could teach stripping. You know, share your gift, pass the torch.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "There you go. Okay, do you think you're gonna be okay?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(after a pause) Finish it!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Your last dance. Do it for us.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(to Phoebe) Really?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, yeah. He deserves to do the thing he loves one last time.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh this is so ho-o-ot!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh no, no, no, don't stop!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(nervously) Yeah...", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I-I-I don't know. Types of trees?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(sympathetic) Oh, I'm so sorry. I don't know any Spanish words.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Things that go \"tssst\" when you put them out.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Things that burn.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Dude, dude! I think you're losing it.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, oh, oh... What a dog says.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(instantly) Pizza toppings, next!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, oh, oh... (5 seconds left)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Girls Chandler could never get?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Where? (looking around)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Hey, where's Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "She and Phoebe took the stripper to the hospital.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Did you know Chandler kissed Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What? When was this?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Nineteen Eighty Seven. The weekend you guys visited me at school.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God! That's wild!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, but it was like a million years ago, so it doesn't matter.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, it matters to me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Why?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Because... the night you kissed Rachel was the night I kissed Rachel for the very first time.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You kissed her that night too?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Seriously, where did this happen?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, after you told me she was passed out in our room, I went in there to make sure she was all right. She was lying on my bed, all buried in peoples coats. Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know. But it was so dark, I accidentally got her lips. I started to pull away, but then I felt her start to kiss me back. It was only for a second, but... it was amazing. And now, now I find out that you kissed her first.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh wait... What bed did you say she was on?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Mine.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, she was definitely on my bed.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Why would I kiss a girl, and then put her on your bed?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, then who was on my bed?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(screeching) OH! Oh, oh! (holding her hand in front of her mouth)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(realizing) NO! No, no!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "YES! (Chandler gets an \"oh no!\" look on his face)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You were under the pile of coats?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I was the pile of coats!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "OH MY GOD!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You were my Midnight Mystery Kisser?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You were my first kiss with Rachel?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You were my first kiss ever?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What did I marry into?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, crap!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, hey Joey.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh, hey.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Listen, I need to ask you something. Ok, you know how my step dad's in prison.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(afraid) Yeah.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah. Well, uhm... listen he was supposed to get a weekend furlough, so he'd come to the wedding tomorrow, but he just called and... uhm... well, apparently stabbing Iceman in the exercise yard just couldn't wait till Monday.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So he can't come?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, and so there's no one to walk me down the aisle and... well, I would just really love it if you would do it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Seriously?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, you've... you know, sort of been like a dad to me. I mean, you've always, you know, looked out for me and shared your wisdom...", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I am pretty wisdomous.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So... what do you say?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Are you kidding? Phoebe, I would be honored. (they hug)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, thank you. I hope... I hope you know how much you mean to me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(takes her hand) Listen, I hope... that you know... (has difficulty saying it) I don't want you to see your father cry, GO TO YOUR ROOM!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh no, no, no, let your dad get this.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(her mobile phone rings) Oh, it's my wedding planner. She's driving me crazy! (she answers) Hello... Hey, ok, stop screaming! Ok? So, halibut. All right, so salmon, either way. I don't-I don't... it doesn't matter to me!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(she enters with a headset on and she's speaking into the microphone) Well, it matters to me!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, I don't care, so you pick!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Did you just hung up on me? (she hangs up too) All right, look, I need you at the rehearsal dinner tonight at 1800 hours.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-uh. Ok. What time is that.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You don't know military time?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Why, I must have been in missile training the day they taught that.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Just subtract twelve.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ok, so... 1800 minus twelve is... one thousand, seven hundred and...", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(screaming) Six o'clock!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ok.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ok. Hold on. (her mobile phone rings) Geller here! No! I said it has to be there by 4 o'clock. Goodbye. (she hangs up) Oh, how hard it is to make an ice sculpture?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ice sculpture? That sounds really fancy! I told you I just want a simple wedding.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Please... honey, leave the details to me. Now I wanna make this day as special for you as I can. Now, ok, I was thinking that the harpist should wear white.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What harpist? My friend Marjorie is playing the steel drums.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ooh... she backed out.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "She did? Why?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I made her. (Phoebe looks shocked) Steel drums don't really say \"elegant wedding\". Nor does Marjorie's overwhelming scent.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(looking angry) Hey! She will shower when Tibet is free.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You look great. I'm so glad we're having this rehearsal dinner, you know, I so rarely get to practice my meals before I eat them.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, what did we say was your one gift to us?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No stupid jokes. I thought that was for the actual wedding.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Rehearse it!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hi! (he kisses Phoebe)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, (he goes towards Mike in order to shake hands but Mike hugs him) hey, oh... I... I was-I was going for a hand shake.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "That is why!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "So Rach.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Where is Emma?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, Monica made me send her to my mother's. Apparently babies and weddings don't mix.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(coming) Are you still crying about your damn baby? Pheebs, you gotta keep the line moving, remember, 20 seconds per person. Your see these clowns all the time! (she takes off)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey, you're Mike's parents, right?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Ah, our little ones are growing up fast, uh?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "You know, on the one hand you're happy for them, but on the other hand it's hard to let go.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Hey, I'm not that fond of you either, ok buddy? But I'm just trying to be nice for the kids!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(to Rachel) You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, I thought we'd be groomsmen, but wouldn't they have asked us by now? When did they ask you to be their bridesmaid?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uh... November?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I wanna say it's not looking good.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey Pheebs...", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What's up?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uhm... you haven't told these guys what they're doing in the wedding yet.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Heh.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uhm... well, they're not in the wedding.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What? (Ross and Chandler don't know what to say, so there's an embarrassing long pause)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, this is really awkward (staring at the floor) Oh, and I can leave!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I'm sorry you guys but, you know, Mike's got his brother and his friends from school so... you know, you were-you were... if it helps you, you were next in line, you just-you just missed the cut.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, man!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "This is like figure skating team all over again. (Phoebe and Ross glare at him astonished) I mean synchronized swimming. (they continue to glare) I mean- I mean the balance beam. (to Ross) Help me!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "FOOTBALL!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thank you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(looking at Phoebe eating something) Pheebs, spit that out, that has pork in it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh! I though the pot stickers were supposed to be vegetarian!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, I changed them. I-I sent you a fax about it!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I don't have a fax machine.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ah, well then there are gonna be a few surprises!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I can't believe we're gonna be the only people that aren't in this wedding.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know, I hate being left out of things.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "And it's a wedding! It'd be weird if I'm not in it...", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Fine. We're just sitting here. Alone. Doing nothing. It's our rehearsal for tomorrow.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "What happened?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Who cares, AND?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I'll do it!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(standing up too) M-Me-me-me!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Pick me, I look great in a tux and I will not steal focus.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, Mike, no, no. You wanna pick me, I mean... watch! (he mimics the groommens way of walking down the aisle with a bridesmaid) Huh?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(to Chandler) Well, if Phoebe's choosing, then say hello to Mike's next groomsman.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I will. But I will need a mirror... as he is me!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Please, you're going down!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You are going downer!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Is that what they say on the Figure Skating Team?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(almost crying) I wouldn't know, I didn't make it! (they hug)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "So, you know I'm filling in for Phoebe's step dad, tomorrow, right?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, hey, my pleasure. (he suddenly becomes very serious) So what are your intentions with my Phoebe?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, a wiseacre. (Mike looks bewildered). No, no, no, I understand you plan to support your wife by playing the piano? Isn't that kind of unstable?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Strike two!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Strike three! You only get one more, Mike!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "So, what did you decide?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I decided to pee.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Mike didn't tell you? You have to chose one of us to be in your wedding. One of his groomsmen fell out.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh no, no. I can't choose between you two! I love you both so much!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Just not enough to put us in the original wedding party.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, I don't wanna choose! It's (Rachel is walking by). Oh okay, wait. Rach! Listen I have a very special bridesmaid task for you today.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(excited and clapping her hands in front of her face) Goody, what is it!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, there's a spot open for only one groomsman and you have to choose between Ross and Chandler. So good luck with that.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What, what, what, no, I don't wanna do that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right, I guess I'll have to find a new bridesmaid.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I'll do it! (Monica approaches)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ok, it's 2100 hours. (to Phoebe) Time for your toast. (Mike appears)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "You had a bathroom break at 2030. Pee on your own time, Mike! (to Phoebe and Mike). Now, in regard to the toast, okay, you wanna keep them short, nothing kills a rehearsal dinner like long speeches. Okay. You just get in, do your thing and get out!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(very serious) It's 2101 and I am not amused. (pause). Ok, the bride and groom have a few words they'd like to say. (Everyone sits and Phoebe gets up)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ok. Hello everyone and thank you all for being here tonight. So tomorrow's the big event and some of you might not know, but Mike and I didn't get off to the best start. (she reads a note). My friend Joey and I decided to fix each other up with friends so I, I... (Monica is twirling her hands in order to make Phoebe speed up her speech) oh I... hum... I gave it a lot of thought and I fixed him up with my friend Mary Ellen who couldn't be here tonight because... (Monica is tapping her watch with her finger) it's not important... she is in rehab. Anyway, so, ok, Joey said that he was fixing me up with his friend Mike, only he didn't have a friend Mike so he just brought, uhm, my Mike and, and (Monica clears her throat) but despite, you know... it got... it got good. Ok, I wanna take a moment to mention my mother, who couldn't be here...", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "And... moment's over! (Rachel, Joey and Chandler all turn and look disapprovingly towards Monica but she just shrugs it off) So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm... (she's flipping cards skipping half of them) Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I (Monica is miming CUT). Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS (she mimes Monica's when she was twirling her hands) OR THIS (she taps her watch) OR THIS (she mimes CUT) OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS! (pause) You know what? You're done.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "YOU'RE FIRED! (mimes the CUT again) (pause and she raises her glass) Cheers! (Chandler raises his, smiling and Monica stares at him and he puts down his glass.)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Happy wedding day!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, happy my wedding day to you!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, man! I wouldn't have had breakfast if I knew there was going to be corsages!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Hi. About last night... I know you are under a lot of stress and even though the things you said hurt me a little bit... My point is, uh, well, I'm willing to take my job back.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, well that's ok. I think you and I will do much better if you're just... here as a bridesmaid.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, is that so? Ok. If that's really what you want, then here... I give you the headset. Well, I don't really want to give you the headset. Well I guess if you're taking over, you should probably return these messages. (hands her a stack of papers with messages and calls to return)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Wow, this is a lot!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-huh, but I'm sure you can handle this. I mean, I have won awards for my organizational skills, but, uh, I'm sure you'll do fine.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You won awards?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Mm-mh. I printed them out on my computer.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hi.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Where's Rach?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "She's in her room, why?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I have to talk to her about this groomsman situation, ok? I'm not gonna watch Chandler up there while I'm sitting in the seats like some chump! (he goes to Rachel's room, knocks the door and enters the room). (very fake gasp) Oh! My God! You're breathtaking!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What d'you want?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You haven't by any chance chosen a groomsman yet, have you?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, Ross, c'mon, please! Don't make this harder than it already is!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I'm not! I'm making it easier! Pick me!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, Chandler said that it's really important to him too!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Listen, listen. Whoever you pick is gonna walk down the aisle with you! Now, I promise I won't say a word, but if you pick Chandler he's gonna be whispering stupid jokes in your ear the whole time!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, you are the lesser of two evils!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(waving his fist in the air in triumph) YES, YES!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Sven I don't understand what you're saying! What is wrong with the flowers? Lorkins? What the hell are lorkins?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know.", "role": "user" } ]