conversations
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[
{
"content": "Joey, if I go first, I wanna be looking for my keys.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Dad, Ronni's here.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So, who's up for a big game of Kerplunk?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Who-ah-ho.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "No you won't.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "If you go to a hotel you'll be...doing stuff. I want you right here where I can keep an eye on you.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "That's right, mister, and I don't care how old you are, as long as you're under my roof you're gonna live by my rules. And that means no sleeping with your girlfriend.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Now dad, you'll be in my room, Ronni uh, you can stay in Chandler's room.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "C'mon, I'll show you to my room. ...That sounds so weird when it's not followed by \"No thanks, it's late.\"",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Okay. Now this is just for tonight. Starting tomorrow, you gotta make a change. This has gone on long enough.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Well, either you break it off with Ronni",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Then you gotta come clean with Ma! This is not right!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I don't wanna hear it! Now go to my room!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, Kicky. What're you doing?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Just trying to get comfortable. I can't sleep in my underwear.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Well, you're gonna.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I've been thinking. Y'know, about how I'm always seeing girls on top of girls...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Are they end to end, or tall like pancakes?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Y'know what I mean, about how I'm always going out with all these women. And I always figured, when the right one comes along, I'd be able to be a stand-up guy and go the distance, y'know? Now I'm looking at my dad, thinking...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hey, you're not him. You're you. When they were all over you to go into your father's pipe-fitting business, did you cave?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No. You decided to go into the out-of-work actor business. Now that wasn't easy, but you did it! And I'd like to believe that when the right woman comes along, you will have the courage and the guts to say \"No thanks, I'm married.\"",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You really think so?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yeah. I really do.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Thanks, Chandler. (Snuggles up to him)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Get off!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hi...May I help you?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Okay...who are you?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, c'mon in.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hi, I'm Rachel.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Bathroom's up there.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, listen, Ronni, how long would you say Chandler's been in the shower?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Perfect. Fasten your seatbelts, it's peepee time. (She goes into Joey and Chandler's apartment, where Mr. Tribbiani is reading the paper) Hey, Mr. Trib.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Chandler Bing? It's time to see your thing.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(Runs out in a towel) What's the matter with you?!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I thought it was Chandler!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(Comes out of his room) What? What?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "You were supposed to be in there so I could see your thing!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Sorry, my my thing was in there with me.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "How's it going?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Good. Oh oh! Roger's having a dinner thing and he wanted me to invite you guys.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So what's going on?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Nothing, um, it's just, um... It's Roger.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I dunno, there's just something about...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Basically we just feel that he's...",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "We hate that guy.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "We're sorry, Pheebs, we're sorry.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Uh-huh. Okay. Okay, don't you think, maybe, though, it's just that he's so perceptive that it freaks you out?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "We're sorry.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ma! What're you doing here?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oww! Big ring!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hold on, you-you knew?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So then how could you I mean, how could you?!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ma, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but... what the hell are you talking about?! I mean, what about you?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I'm...happy...for you?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ma, I'm sorry. I just did what I thought you'd want.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Yeah. You're ten times prettier than she is.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "With this ring? (Her engagement ring.) No contest.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Nothing, nothing.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "It's, I mean, it's nothing, I'm fine. It's my friends. They-they have a liking problem with you. In that, um, they don't.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "But they don't see all the wonderfulness that I see. They don't see all the good stuff and all the sweet stuff. They just think you're a little...",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Intense and creepy.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "But I don't. Me, Phoebe.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "You're not? See, that's why you're so great!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So you talked to your dad, huh.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah. He's gonna keep cheating on my ma like she wanted, she's gonna keep pretending she doesn't know even though she does, and my little sister Tina can't see her husband any more because he got a restraining order...which has nothing to do with anything except that I found out today.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Wow.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Things sure have changed here on Waltons mountain.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "So Joey, you okay?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, I guess. It's just parents, after a certain point, you gotta let go. Even if you know better, you've gotta let them make their own mistakes.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Just think, in a couple of years we get to turn into them.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "If I turn into my parents, I'll either be an alcoholic blond chasing after twenty-year-old boys, or... I'll end up like my mom.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(entering) Hey.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "How's it going?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, okay, except I broke up with Roger.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Yeah, right.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "What happened?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I don't know, I mean, he's a good person, and he can be really sweet, and in some ways I think he is so right for me, it's just... I hate that guy!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, Joey. What's going on?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Clear the tracks for the boobie payback express. Next stop",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Joey!! What the hell were you doing?!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Sorry. Wrong boobies.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hello, Joey.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "She barely knows me. We just live in the same building.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Any contact?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "She lent me an egg once.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You're in!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Aw, right.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey. (stutters something incoherent)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbianI don't think we need a third...",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Excuse me, could we get an egg over here, still in the shell? Thanks.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "An egg?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, you're gonna go up to her and say, \"Here's your egg back, I'm returning your egg.\"",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I think it's winning.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I think it's insane.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "She'll love it. Go with the egg, my friend.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Think it'll work?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No, it's suicide. The man's got an egg.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "You can not do this.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Do what, do what?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Roger wants to take her out tomorrow night.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No! Phoebes! Don't you remember why you dumped the guy?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "'Cause he was creepy, and mean, and a little frightening... alright, still, it's nice to have a date on Valentine's Day!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "But Phoebe, you can go out with a creepy guy any night of the year. I know I do.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Well, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, uh, listen, about tonight...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No, no, no, don't you dare bail on me. The only reason she's goin' out with me is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yes, I know, but her friend sounds like such a...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Hi. She said yes.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yes! Way to go, man! (Chandler and Ross hug. Something crunches in Ross' shirt pocket.) Still got the egg, huh?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(Looking at himself in the reflection on a knife) How do I look?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, uh, I... don't... care. (Joey's date shows up) Ok, now, remember, no trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "...And what did you bring?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Janice?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(angrily) Hey, it's Janice.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok, I'm makin' a break for it, I'm goin' out the window.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, no, no, don't! I've been waitin' for like, forever to go out with Lorraine. Just calm down.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Calm down? Calm down? You set me up with the woman that I've dumped twice in the last five months!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(at the urinal) Can you stop yellin'? You're makin' me nervous, and I can't go when I'm nervous.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right. (gets up right behind Joey and yells in his ear) Come on, do it, do it, go, come on!!!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok, ok, Roger was creepy, but he was nothing compared to Pete Carney.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Which one was Pete Carney?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Pete the Weeper? Remember that guy who used to cry every time we had sex. (imitating) \"Was it good for you?\"",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, well, I'll take a little crying any day over Howard-the-\"I-win\"-guy. (imitating) \"I win! I win!\" I went out with the guy for two monthsI didn't get to win once.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "How did we end up with these jerks? We're good people!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I don't know. Maybe we're some kinda magnets.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I know I am. That's why I can't wear a digital watch.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "There's more beer, right?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh! You know my friend Abby who shaves her head? She said that if you want to break the bad boyfriend cycle, you can do like a cleansing ritual.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Pheebes, this woman is voluntarily bald.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah. So, we can do it tomorrow night, you guys. It's Valentine's Day. It's perfect.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, well, what kind of ritual?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ok. We can, um, we can burn the stuff they gave us.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Or?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Or...or we can chant and dance around naked, you know, with sticks.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Burning's good.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Burning's good. Yeah, I got stuff to burn.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Good for you. (jumps suddenly) Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "That's OK.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(to Lorraine) We can't do that.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(disgusted) What? What can't you do?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Uh, can I talk to you for a second, over there?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Uh, we might be leaving now.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Tell me it's \"you and me\" we.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'm not even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, you can not do this to me.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You're right, I'm sorry. You're right.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I'm outta here. Here's my credit card. Dinner's on me. I'm sorry, Chandler.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I hope she throws up on you.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So...",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, what a crappy night!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Excuse me. (gets up, jumps up and down while he zips his zipper up... other patrons look at him) How ya doin'?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Joey's not a friend. He's...a stupid man who left us his credit card. Another drink? Some dessert? A big screen TV?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "You got it. Good woman! (the waiter turns around, it's a man) Could we get a bottle of your most overpriced champagne?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "That's right, each. Oh, and a uh Rob Roy. (to Janice) I've always wanted to know...",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "No... no! And yet it did. Good-bye, Janice.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, Chandler, sorry.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ohhh, Chandler, sorry! Hey, Janice.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok, well, this was very special.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Rach, come see who's out here!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh my god. Janice, hi!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Janice is gonna go away now.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I'll be right back.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, Joey, look who it is.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(in disbelief) Whoa.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, good, Joey's home now.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close, personal friend.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "If you wanna put a label on it.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Nope, nope, that's it.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok, so now we need, um sage branches and the sacramental wine.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "All I have is, is oregano and a Fresca.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Um, that's ok! (throws it in fire) Ok. All right. Now we need the semen of a righteous man.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, Pheebs, you know what, if we had that, we wouldn't be doing the ritual in the first place.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Can we just start throwing things in?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, yeah, ok. (she throws the directions in) Oh, OK.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(tossing things in the fire) Ok, Barry's letters. Adam Ritter's boxer shorts.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, and I have the, uh receipt for my dinner with Nokululu Oon Ah Ah.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Look, here's a picture of Scotty Jared naked.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(looking at picture) Hey he's wearing a sweater.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "And here we have the last of Paulo's grappa.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Hey, Rachel, isn't that stuff almost pure...",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "How can I dump this woman on Valentine's day?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, man. In my next life, I'm coming back as a toilet brush.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hi, Just Janice.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(to Chandler) If you don't do it, I will.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So, um, what do you do for a living?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Now that is funny. Hey, do you think...would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 'Cause she's, she's alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Come on. These people'll scooch down. You guys'll scooch, won't you? Let's try scooching! Come on. Come on. Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick. Carol, Kristin. Uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. And, Kristin, Kristin...(struggling)...does something that, funnily enough, wasn't even her major!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "You know, it's a really funny story how this happened.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Really?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Is it loaded? Oh, little candy hearts. (reading the candy) Chan and Jan Forever.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok, Janice. Janice. Hey, Janice. Look, there's no way for me to tell you this. At least there's no new way for me to tell you this. I just don't things are gonna work out.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(surprised) It is?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh no, you see, actually it is.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, no I don't.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I did, but...",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Call me!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "You did so. I swear, I swear(noticing Kristin's absence) How long has she been in the bathroom?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Well maybe it's cold in there. Or maybe I screwed up the first date I had in 9 years.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
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