bpben/friends_script · Datasets at Hugging Face

conversations listlengths 1 62
[ { "content": "Yeah, Im missing out on all this other stuff, too. So, Joey suggested Rachel move in with me.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "What?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(not amused) Huhuh-huh.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(with his mouth full) Just a second! (he fake laughs, but turns his head and starts to break down)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "How could you not tell Mona that Rachel is living with you?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont know, she seemed to think it was such a crazy idea! Um, plus, she, uh, she got me taffy!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Taffy, really? Ive never had any.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ever?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, I think my mother was too busy planning her suicide to provide saltwater treats. (Ross hands her one) Thank you! So what, youre just never going to tell her?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, no, no, no, I will! I just want to butter her up, first! You know, Im going to take her to an amazing Valentines dinner. Do all this romantic stuff, and then, just when she thinks Im the best boyfriend in the world, then Im going to tell her that my pregnant ex-girlfriend is living with me.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "If I havent said it before", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "So, between her and me being friends, and her history with Ross, it just isnt going to happen. It would be like you falling in love with a cat.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey, buddy. Hows my favorite dog, huh? Hows my favorite dog? (the dog doesnt move) Youre subdued. (to Joey) Did you give him a beer?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Will you excuse us, we need to talk for a moment.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, sure. Go ahead. (pause) Oh, me, right!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Hes miserable! What happened to him?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Nothing. We just talked about stuff.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What stuff?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Rachel stuff.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "OhJoey, you bummed him out! This was the happiest dog in the world, and he spends half a day with you, and look at him!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hes breathing!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, Im going to take him back to Wendys.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, no, no, no! Hes fine! Look, look, look! (picks up the ball) Heres your ball! Get your ball! Get your ball! (he throws the ball and it bounces right next to the dog) Get your ball! My God, what have I done to you, huh? I broke the dog! Pheebs, I broke the dog!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Well, Im, uh, going to pick up Mona. What have you got going tonight?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, Ive got big Valentines plans! Ive got my Chinese food on the way, and the rest of your saltwater taffy!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yknow, its interesting! Most people think thats made with seawater, when in fact", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ross, we actually watched the documentary together.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Ooh! My Chinese food! Let me get my cash! (runs to her room to get her money)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(opening the door to see Mona standing there) Mona? What arehi! What are you doing here? Im, um, supposed to pick you up!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(he makes some really weird noise hear that sounds kind of like)Ayyyayyyy!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(entering) Oh, hey, Mona!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "I have no idea!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ill be watching TV if anybody needs me. (exits to her room)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Uhlately, she just likes hanging out here.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I think shes lonely.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "I know.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "No, no. Shes way to emotional. And by emotional I mean crazy.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Im not here! Thats just my Chinese food!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Mm-hmm. Shesshes emotional, but, but ballsy.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You know what Im going to do? Im going to get in my sweats, and eat this in bed! (exits)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "And you thought she was going to be in our way! So, why dont you, uh, open the champagne, and Ill be right back. Ive got a surprise for you.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(fakes a laugh) Please start drinking! (exits)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(entering) Im just going to grab the phone.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, Im sorry! Do you need the phone?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(as Ross enters with a present) But, but, Mona, I live here.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(handing Mona the present) Happy Valentines Day! Or something to remember me by.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "How long has it been this time?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "90 seconds.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thats better. 90 seconds is a long time not to think about itexcept all I did was think about it.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You know, it haunts me? Up til now, the worst thing I ever saw, was my father doing tequila shots off the naked houseboy. After this, I would gladly make that my screensaver!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, well, we have to get past this! Why dont we get rid of the tape and pretend it never existed?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I can do that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Okay. Now all weve got to do is get rid of this chair.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, thank God!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I know!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Come in!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Hi! Im so sorry to barge in on your Valentines, but I had to get away from all the yelling. Mona is dumping Ross.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, my God.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Poor Ross.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, great. We have to watch him do yoga in his underwear, but for this he closes the drapes!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Rach, you know that birthing tape you wanted to see? Its here.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, and we should warn you, before you watch it", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Why? You saw it? Is it scary?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, lets just say its ironic how footage of someone being born can make you want to kill yourself.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, but I will leave a sweater that smells like me right next to you!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Cmon, seriously, you guys, youre not going to make me watch this alone!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Shes rightof course not. Honey, get the tape.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(with his arm all the way under the cushion, moving it around) This reminds me of a very specific part of the tape. (Chandler puts the tape in, and they all sit down) Okay, here we go.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. (watching the tape) Ooh, my! (Rachel jumps when the woman starts screaming) Woah! Why is that baby torturing that woman?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Why have I seen this thing three times?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Itsstill beautiful.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uh! Its horrible!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I know! I know, Im so sorry for you!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, my God!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Wait, you guys, look!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What? Did her ass explode?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, the babys out! Look, look!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, look at those little fingers and toes!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "And look how happy the mom is now!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "OhRach!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, screw you guys, you dont have to do it!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Hey, hey, man!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey, whats up?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "UhMona just dumped me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, man, Im sorry. Why?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, with everything thats been going on lately, I havent exactly been the perfect boyfriend. You know, I, uh, I didnt tell her I got Rachel pregnant. I gave her a key to my apartment, and then had the locks changed! And then I lied to her about Rachel moving in with me. In a way, I actually judge her for not breaking up with me sooner, you know?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Still, that really sucks, man. Especially on Valentines Day.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah. Wait a minute. What are you doing here? Joey Tribbiani without a date on Valentines Day? Whats going on, huh? Girl trouble?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Sort of.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Really?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You dont have to seem so happy about it.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, sorry. Well, look, maybe I can help you with it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, II d", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey, whatever it is, I am sure it has happened to me. Yknow, actually onceonce I got dumped during sex.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Anyway, so, uh, so what is it?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Forget about it. Its no big deal.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Cmon! Joey! What is it?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Its nothing.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey, hey, its me. Why cant you tell me?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, uhsit down. (they do) Um theres this woman that I like. A lot. But, uhit cant happen.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Shes not a Tribbiani?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I knew it. So, is she someone from work?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yes.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, uh, does she like you?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Sometimes I think maybe she could. But it doesnt matter, because I cant do anything about it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Why not?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. Someone from work, too. And I could never do that to the guy, because were really good friends.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he still in love with her?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No. I dont think so.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. Um is he a good guy?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, hes the best.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I dont know.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joey, its worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I do! So much! I cant stop thinking about her! I cant sleep, I", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Im going touhIm going to, um, put the bourbon in it at home.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, yeah.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Anyway seriously, uhjustjust talk to the guy, okay? And tell me how it goes. (walks towards the door until)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Its Rachel.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(thinking) Youre going to have a baby, and you need to be prepared. Now, youre going to make yourself watch the whole thing. Just do it! (Rachel puts the tape in the VCR)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(thinking) Hmmmaybe it starts with how she gets pregnant.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Theres this woman, that I like. A lot. Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. And I could never do that to the guy, yknow? Ccause were really good friends.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he a good guy?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, hes the best.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I dont know.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joey, its worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I do! So much! I cant stop thinking about her! I cant sleep, I", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself. (Walks towards the door until)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Its Rachel.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(closes the door) Did you umIm sorry, did you just say its Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yes.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Um, youyou like Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yes. I like Rachel.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Rachel?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(startled) Yeah, okay but look, buy uhHey-hey, yknow, yknow who else I like? You! And it-it doesnt get said enough. I like you Ross.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "But R-R-Rachel-Rachel?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, but its not a big deal.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Its not a big deal? Oh, Im sorry I justum, Iwhat about all the stuff you-you just said? I mean how about, I likeyou-you cant stop thinking about her. Like how you cant sleep?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im an actor, yknow? As-as a group, we tend to be over dramatic.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Rachel whos carrying my baby? Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Look no, I-I know its bad, and I know its wrong. Okay? But-but its not like anythings ever gonna happen. Yknow? These-these are just feelings, theyre gonna go away.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yknow what? I-I gotta go. (Starts to leave.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh come on Ross! Hey Ross-Ross dont", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(stops) I justyknowI-I just have oneRachel?!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh-oh! Okay, shes kicking!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh! (Puts his hand on her belly.) Shes growing inside you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Whoa!!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh! (Pulls his hand away.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Wow that was a big one.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I think thats the youngest girl ever to reject me.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Oh hey you guys!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh hey!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hi!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey listen let me ask you, do you believe in soul mates?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh yes I do. I do. I believe that there is one perfect person out there for everyone. And do you know how you find him? You stop looking for him. Thats why I stopped looking for Russell Crowe. Hell find me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-huh, (To Chandler) and you?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No. I mean I believe that uh, certain people are more suited for each other and I believe in falling in love, but soul mates, I dont think they exist.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, good.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Why?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well last night, I met Monicas.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, I had a date with this guy, and I swear to God, he is her other half.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Come on, dont be crazy. (To Rachel) You dont think theres someone out there better suited for Monica than me, do ya? (Rachel looks at him.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(To Phoebe) Well, whats he like?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well hes tall.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-huh.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "He has brown hair.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Of course, of course.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "A tall guy with hair similar to mine, oh unknowable universe!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "He works with food!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh sure. Older?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Obviously, and hes British.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I was just gonna ask!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah? And, hes-hes so centered and mature and confident.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, its so sad they never had a chance to meet.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Luckily, the guy she settled for cant hear what youre talking about.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, Im so sorry. Um, and maybe Im wrong! I butyknow Im gonna go out with him again, Ill find out more.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You believe that this guy is destined for someone else and youre still gonna date him?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, he may not be my soul mate, but a girls gotta eat.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Hey.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I just talked to Joey, I justI want to see how you were.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh yknow, I stillI cant believe it. Joey and Rachel I mean its Its like you and me going out, only weirder!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right, I know youre hurting, and-and I want to be supportive, but dont say that again.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God! What if, what if they get married? Then hed be the stepfather of my child.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey, I dont think thats something we need to worry about! First of all hes-hes never gonna tell her how he feels about her. And even if he did you have no idea how shed react.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Sure, because women never like Joey. Yknow, I think hes a virgin.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joeyhes not even thinking about going after Rachel!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hes not?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No! All hes thinking about is how youre taking this! I mean, listen its totally freaking him out. Hes talking about moving to Vermont.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Why?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "He says he wants to leave the country. (Pause) He thinks you hate him.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hate him? I No, I dont hate him. (Pause) Its just its Rachel, yknow?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey I cant even imagine how hard this must be for you. But, I dont want you to lose Joey over it. And right now he just needs to know that youre still his friend.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay. Okay, Ill talk to him.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right. Now do it soon, he just asked me how to convert his dollars into Vermont money.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh! Hi!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hi!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Umm, Chandler, Monica, this is Don.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(mouths to Chandler) Soul mate.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(mouths to Phoebe) What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(cough talks) Soul mate.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So, what have you guys been doing?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I know! What is this, 1985?!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Not really.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Whats wrong with sun-dried tomatoes? (Everyone stares at him.) On a barbecue chicken pizza? (Still theres staring.) No?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So Don, what-what other restaurants do you like?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh my God! Thats my restaurant, Im the chef there.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "No!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, Id like a latte. Oh yknow what? If youre gonna talk about me, Im gonna go with you.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "What are you doing?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Nothing! I swear to God I didnt know you guys would be here! And the good news is you didnt believe in soul mates. So", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I believe in tall, handsome strangers who hit on my wife!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Theyre just talking, and yknow what? Just because I think theyre soul mates doesnt mean anythings gonna happen.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(returning) Phoebe, good work.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah! Oh hes great, I love him. (Walks away and Chandler glares at Phoebe.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Dont worry, well find you someone else.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Hey.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Look, I understand if you came by to hit me, I deserve it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, I dont want to hit you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh what then? Kick me?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(getting worried) Bite me?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, no I dont want to do anything to you. All right? I just want to tell you that Im not mad at you andand that I certainly do not hate you. I just, I just came here to say that. (Starts to leave.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh nowHey Ross-Ross! Do you wanna-wanna come in for a beer or something?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uhyeah sure. (Enters.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Do uh, do you got any beer? All-all I got is this melon stuff that Rachel left. I dont", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(pouring two glasses) Hey look Ross, you need to understand something okay? I uhI am never gonna act on this Rachel thing, okay? I-I would never do anything to jeopardize my friendship with you. (He hands Ross a glass.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thank you.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Anyway, it uhlook itll justtake me a while to get over her, thats all. Im not even sure how to do that, I mean Ive never been in love before so", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?! Youre in love with her.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, I thought you knew that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Umm, no.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Wow. Hey look, if it helps, I dont want to feel this way. Honest. I just keep thinking, \"Ah, Ill get over this.\" Yknow? I justIt just keeps gettin harder. I dont, I dont know what to do. Yknow? What do I do?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I think you need to tell her how you feel.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay thats the green stuff talkin.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, Im serious. You-you need to find out where she is, because if shes not where you are, then you can start to move past this.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "But what if uhand Im not saying she will beBut", "role": "user" }, { "content": "If she is where you are then uhthen my feeling weird about it shouldnt stand in the way.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Are you sure?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah. Look if-if shes gonna end up with somebody else, the truth is she couldnt find a better guy. So", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey thanks.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So when do you think youre gonna talk to her?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God I have to tell her! I havent even thought about what I will say. What should I say?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Im understanding, but lets not get carried away.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im sorry, youre right. What am I gonna say? (He takes another sip of the green stuff and recoils at the taste.) Oh!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, tell me about it. (He stands up, turns his back to Joey, and enjoys another sip.)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Cheese you say? Thats some pretty smelly work, huh Don?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Cheese, its smelly. You must smell a lot of the time too.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Me too! Yeah, Chandler cant stand it. He wont even allow me to have blue cheese in the house.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "You know what Id love to do? I would like to go to France and eat nothing but bread and cheeseNot even bread, just cheese. No, I want the bread. Yeah. Ah, and pastries (Breathlessly) And pate. Oh, Im really not high, its just I used to be fat.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Is it made of cheese?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Id move in tomorrow!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(disgusted) Oh come on! (To Phoebe) Are you listening to this?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Im so sorry.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What do we do?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont know, they both want to live in a house of cheese! I dont know how you fight that.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Okay. Okay, I can do this. I can tell her how I feel. Just uh, just stand up straight. (Does so.) Take a couple deep breaths. (Does so.) Look confident. (Does so as Rachel opens the door and startles him.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joey? Whats up?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I uh, I just came by because I-I want to talk to you about something.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay whats up?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Here? In the hall? What are we animals?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well honey, Im late for a meeting. So can you just make it quick?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay umm, I just came by to tell you that Iwant to have dinner with you tonight. Thats all.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Sure! That sounds great! Just leave me a message and tell me where to meet you. Okay? (Walks away.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay. Thats good. Okay, that give you a couple hours to prepare what youre gonna say. Good. Yeah. (Someone comes out of his apartment and it startles Joey again.) Dont you people ever knock?!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Id like to have Don and Phoebe over. Wouldnt that be nice?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Sure, why dont you set it up. Ill just be over here, browsing through the personals.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Are you okay? Youve been acting weird all afternoon.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, fine. Fine. Not perfect!! But good enough.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Jeez! What is with you?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im sorry, did you say cheese?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right, whats going on?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Phoebe thinks you and Don are soul mates, and I dont believe in that kind of stuff. But then you two totally get along. So look, I wont stand in your way if you want to run off with Don and live in a house of cheese.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Chandler, you dont believe in soul mates?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No. But Im sure (mimics Don) tomatoes does.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont believe in soul mates either.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You dont?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No. I dont think that you and I were destined to end up together. I think that we fell in love and work hard at our relationship. Some days we work really hard.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So youyou dont want to live with Don in a cheese house?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, Ive had second thoughts about that. Do you realize how hard that would be to clean?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I love you.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I know.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yknow what? I am going to take you out to dinner tonight. I found this place that makes the greatest mozzarella sticks and jalepino poppers . (Monica doesnt look impressed.) No? Really? They taste so good.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What? Yeah! Sure! Uh, look at the uh, the reason(Exhales slowly)Is it hot in here?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No. Not-not for me, but why dont you take off your sweater?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I would, but this is a nice place and my T-shirt has a picture of Calvin doing Hobbs.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh my God! Really?! Can I see it?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah. Sure. (They both half stand up, Joey pulls the neck of his sweater out, and Rachel looks down it to see his T-shirt.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Huh. Wow, I wouldnt think Hobbs would like that so much.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uh How long have we known each other?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Um, sevene-e-eight, eight years. Wow.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uh-huh, long time.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "But over the past few weeks", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Actually uh, could you give us a second?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "So you were saying?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Im not quite sure.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, well you had asked me how long we had known each other, and I said, \"Eight years.\" And the um, waiter came over and cut his tip in half, and ummnow here we are.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, here we are. Uhh I I think Imfalling in love with you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(stunned) What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Im falling in love with you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(looking around) Who are you talking too? Oh, youre kidding! Oh, its a joke! (Laughs.) Its funny. Its funny. I dont get it. (Joey doesnt say any thing and Rachel realizes its not a joke.) Oh. (Pause) Okay. Umm I-Iuh, wow. Are you uh How did umm When?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Does it really matter?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Wow! Wow. Wow. Wow, it is hot in here.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay look Rach, I know this is a lot. You dont have to say anything. You-you uh, you take as much time as you need. (Long pause as Rachel says nothing.) Okay, you gotta say something!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Joey, Joey I love you so much, but I", "role": "user" }, { "content": "But. (Hangs his head down.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Joey.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah-yeah right. Thats okay. Thats fine. Thats uh, pretty much what I was expecting. So uh, its no big deal. All right? I think Im gonna go. (Stands up.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No! Joey please! Please dont! Please dont leave like this! Now come on, you cannot do this to a pregnant woman! (Starts to cry.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Dont start doing that. You cant do that Rach, cause then youre gonna make me do that. (Starts to cry.) Oh, here we go! (Sits down next to her.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Can I? (Hug him.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Sure!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh Joey honey I dontI dont want to lose", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey-hey-hey, hey! You cant. Okay? Ever!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im so sorry.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh no-no Rach, please, dont be sorry. Okay? Dont be sorry. (They hug again.) Yknow I was only kidding you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, that was a real good one.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Joey? Are you in there?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "(hearing Rachel and jumping up with his plate) Oh God! Thats Rachel!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joey, you have to talk to her!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No-no, I cant! I cant! Not after the other night, its just itstoo weird, okay? Dont tell her Im here! (Turns to run to the bathroom and his bagel falls off the plate onto the floor.) Dont eat that! (Runs to the bathroom as Rachel enters.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey Rachel!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Is Joey here?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont see him. (To Monica) Do you see him?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I dont see him. Hey! Maybe hes in the sugar bowl! (Opens the sugar bowl) Joey? Nope! (Closes the sugar bowl and they both laugh.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, at least you make each other laugh.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Whats up?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, I havent seen him since that night that he told me how he yknow I dont know, I think hes avoiding me. Why is that bagel on the floor?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "We were playing a game.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ew, was Chandler naked? Sort of like a, like a ring toss kind of situation?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Sure.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?! No! No!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "All right. Well listen, if you see Joey will you just tell him uhtell him I miss him. (Exits and Joey enters.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(To Joey) Okay, did you hear that?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, a naked bagel game? (Picks up his dropped bagel.) (To Chandler) Dude, I dont know. Thats a pretty small hole.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey, you gotta talk to her.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I cant! Yknow? You guys dont know what its like to put yourself out there like that and just get shot down.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(incredulous) I dont know what thats like?! Up until I was 25 I thought the only response to, \"I love you,\" was, \"Oh crap!\"", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hello? No rejection? I got shot down at fat camp! Boy, kids are mean when theyre hungry.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right so, so what do I do?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "This is Rachel. I mean, what are you gonna do, never going to talk to her again? I mean I know its weird, its awkward, but you gotta at least try.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah. Okay. (Goes to take a bite out of the previously mentioned bagel.) Whoa! (Stops.) I almost forgot this was on your", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(interrupting him) We didnt play it!!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Okay, so when youre done with your tea Ill look at your leaves and tell you your fortune.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I didnt know you read tea leaves.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh yeah, Ive done it for years. I actually stopped because I was so accurate. Yknow, and-and yknow, one of the great joys of life is its-its wondrous unpredictability. Yknow? And also tea tends to give me the trots.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, Im done. Read mine.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. (Looks at the leaves.) Ooh, I see a ladder. (Checks the book) Which can mean either a promotion or a violent death.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(stunned) I-Im the head chef. I-I cant get promoted.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm, whos next?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, Im done. Do mine.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. (Reads the leaves) Umm, oh! Okay, I see a circle.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ah.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh! (Checking the book) Which can either mean youre having a baby or youre gonna make a scientific discovery!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, I have been spending a lot of time in the lab.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What does yours say Pheebs?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Umm Wow, all right. (Checks the book.) Wow! Yay! Ooh, Im gonna meet a guy! And really soon! And hes gonna be the man of my dreams. Probably not the guy I had a dream about last night. (Points at Chandler.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey! Has anyone seen my shirt? Its a button down, like a, like a faded salmon?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You mean your pink shirt?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Faded salmon color.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, I-I havent seen your pink shirt.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Great! Great. Then I mustve left it at Monas. I knew it!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, Im sure you get another one at Ann Taylors.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thats my favorite shirt! Okay? I love that shirt!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well just ask Mona to give it back!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont know. I mean I-I guess I could. Its just that we didnt really end things such good terms. And if I go over there Id be ignoring the one thing she asked me to do when we broke up, jump up my own ass and die. (Walks away.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(noticing a guy sitting by the green post looking at her) Oh wait a second you guysfor the last couple weeks Ive been that guy everywhere I go. We take the same bus. We go to the same bookstore, the same dry cleaners; maybe hes the tea guy. (He gets up to leave, and smiles at Phoebe.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Phoebe, did you see that?! He totally checked you out! He is so cute! (Looking at his tea.) Mine has a picture of The Village People, what does that mean?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Hi!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Hi.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hi.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Tea gives Phoebe the trots.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "So I thought Joey and I would be okay once we hung out, but its not even like we know how to be with each other anymore.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know its tough now, but things will get better.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "How do you know that? What if it just gets worse and worse and worse, to the point where we cant even be in the same room with each other?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Some cheese?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey, what is the Bruce Springsteen CD in the Kat Stevens case?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Lets just say if I cant find the right CD case I just put it in the nearest one.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, where is the Kat Stevens CD?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "In the James Taylor case.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Where is the James Taylor CD?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Honey, Im gonna save you some time, 200 CDs, not one of them in the right case.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. No need to panic. Deep breathes everyone. Okay umm uh, were just gonna have to spend some time and put the CDs in the right cases.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, if were gonna do that we should come up with some kind of order. Yknow alphabetically or by genre?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hmm, I dont know. We really have to talk this through.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God!! You guys have such problems!! I feel so terrible for you!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, I-Im sorry. You and Joey, your both focusing on this uncomfortable thing, what you need to do is to change the subject. Next time you see him try to get him talking about something else.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh yeah. That makes sense.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, like I dont know, maybe you have a work problem that you need his advice on.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ooh, I can do that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Good. (To Chandler) Uh honey, the Miami Vice soundtrack? Really?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "They were just giving those away at the store (off Monicas look) in exchange for money.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hi.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh I really dont know what to tell you Rach, I really dont. I mean, maybe Joey can help you out with your, with your big work problem.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah Joey shesRachels got this really big work problem, and it is a head scratcher. Wow! (To Chandler) Yknow what, if were gonna make dinner were gonna have to leave. Yeah. (She and Chandler exit.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So you uh, have abig work problem?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah its umm Yeah its uh It-its yknowIts nothing.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Huh. Okay. (Awkward silence.) So uh, I think Im gonna take off.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "YeahNo wait! Joey no wait it is. Its something. Its-its ummits my boss.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, and umm my baby.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "My boss wants to buy my baby!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What?! Oh my-oh my God!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I know I told you, its a really big problem.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What he wants to buy your baby?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Can you believe that?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Thats crazy!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thats what I told him!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, how did this even happen?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well Ill tell ya! (Pause) See uh my-my boss and his wifeThey-they cant have children. So umm, and thatwe were at the Christmas party, and he got drunk, and he said to me, \"Rachel, I want to buy your baby.\"", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Man! When you said it was a problem about your boss and the baby I figured it was something about maternity leave.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ohh! Yeah! (Pause) Yeah that-that wouldve been a much simpler problem.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh hello.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh Jim, Jim Nelson Im Phoebe, Phoebe Buffay. We certainly have been seeing a lot of each other lately.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Well, maybe we will. (Starts to walk away.) Oh! (She turns around and the exchange information.)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Mona? (Theres no answer, so he starts to leave but remembers where her extra key is. He reaches atop a hall light just outside her door and grabs the key. He looks at in triumph as the pain from it being hot moves along his nervous system to his brain, and when it arrives his brain orders his hand to drop the hot key and his mouth to squeal in pain. After dropping the key he pulls his shirtsleeve over his hand and uses the key to open the door and enter Monas apartment.) Okay, if I were a salmon shirt, where would I be? (He hears a key in the door and as it opens he dives behind the couch.)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh my God, honey we are so meant to be together. We both have copies of the Annie soundtrack.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey, both yours.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey! Great advice on that Joey thing!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah? The work problem?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh it was perfect! I mean it really felt like he was my friend again.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What problem did you tell him you had?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh thats not important. The point is, I reallyI think everythings gonna be okay.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Do you think you can just buy my friends baby?!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Isnt it funny how we kept running into each other? Its as if someone really wants us to be together.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, witty banter. Well done.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh okay, well Im a masseuse, and I used to work at this place", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I-I-I like, I like parties.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Yeah I guess, a little.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(a little freaked out) So! Umm, anyway I-I lived in New York, someone wildly I guess, for ummWell since I was fourteen.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh stop it.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Okay. Umm look, youre coming on a little strong. But Im going to give you the benefit of the doubt, because it seems the universe really wants to be together. So, why dont we just start over okay? And you can just tell me about yourself.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Okay.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "What?!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh my God!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Wow! You do?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "All right. (Gets up and walks out.)", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "(singing) The sunll come outtomorrow! Betyour bottom dollar that tomorrow (The girls start laughing, and in a deep voice) therell be sun.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey! Oh Joey, honey listen, thank you for talking to my yesterday about that thing with my boss. That really meant a lot.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Not a problem. Oh, and just so you know, that guys not going to be bothering you about that baby thing anymore.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(worried) What?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Lets just say I took care of it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Whoa-whoa-whoa, lets say more!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Dont worry! Dont worry. I just told him, very nicely, \"You dont go buying peoples babies, so back off!!\"", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "No! No, no-no-no Joey he doesnt want to buy my baby! I made that up!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?! Why?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So that we would have something to talk about! So it wouldnt be awkward!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "And you couldnt think of anything else?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You said your boss wants to buy your baby?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(To Joey) I cant believe that you yelled at my boss! Im-Im gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You can always sell your baby.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh Joey, I cant believe you brought my boss into this! Im gonna get fired!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You lied to me!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, she told me too! (Points to Monica and Joey glares at her.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Chandler has two copies of Annie!", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Hello!!", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Not touching myself if that makes anyone less uncomfortable.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Morning. You wanted to see me?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Okay look Mr. Zelner", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Yeah. (Motions for him to continue.)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh God.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Well, as long as we are clear about that. (Exits smugly.)", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh there it is.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thats not your regular dry cleaners.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know, but that creep that I went on that date with goes to there so I have to find a new one. I also have to find a new video store, a new bank, a new adult bookstore, a new grocery store", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "A new grocery store. The universe said I was going to meet a nice guy and thats what they gave me? (Looks up) When I get up there Im going to kick some ass.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Dont worry Phoebe, youre gonna meet someone. If I can meet a great guy, so can you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, we both can. And we both will.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh, you didnt have to come in with me.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Are you kidding? This is where they get out stains! Okay? This is like Disneyland for me. Im-Im gonna be over here watching the dance of the clean shirts. (She points to and walks over to the electric clothes rack they have.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "What?", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "Oh yeah well, Im sorry about that too, but what are you going to do?", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "A little. (She turns around and looks up.) (To the universe) Now youre talking.", "role": "user" } ]
[ { "content": "I-I-Id love to. Let me just tell my friend.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(to the clerk) Ooh, an ink stain! Hey, can I watch how you get this out?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(looking around) She mustve left.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "Hi.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So? What-what-what happened?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Its all gonna be okay. Theyre just so happy that Im not suing them that they gave me one extra month paid maternity leave. So long as I understand that the money should not construed as a down payment on this or any other child I should bear.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Wow, Ralph Lauren is really going out of there way to show theyre not in the baby buying business.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Chandler, can you give us a minute?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh Im sorry, youre kicking me out of my own living room?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ill be in there. (Goes into the bedroom.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Joey, Im really sorry that I lied to you. I was just trying to make things", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I know. I know.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "It kinda worked. I mean yknow, I dont know about you buy I havent thought about our thing since all this.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey youre right. Yeah, its kinda been like us again a little bit.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah I know! I miss that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Me too. I mean Ihavent thought at all about how I put myself out there and said all that stuff and how you didnt feel the same way about me and-and how it was really awkward.", "role": "assistant" } ]
[ { "content": "My gynecologist tried to kill me.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Yeah, Im missing out on all this other stuff, too. So, Joey suggested Rachel move in with me.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "What?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(not amused) Huhuh-huh.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(with his mouth full) Just a second! (he fake laughs, but turns his head and starts to break down)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "How could you not tell Mona that Rachel is living with you?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont know, she seemed to think it was such a crazy idea! Um, plus, she, uh, she got me taffy!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Taffy, really? Ive never had any.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ever?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, I think my mother was too busy planning her suicide to provide saltwater treats. (Ross hands her one) Thank you! So what, youre just never going to tell her?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, no, no, no, I will! I just want to butter her up, first! You know, Im going to take her to an amazing Valentines dinner. Do all this romantic stuff, and then, just when she thinks Im the best boyfriend in the world, then Im going to tell her that my pregnant ex-girlfriend is living with me.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "If I havent said it before", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "So, between her and me being friends, and her history with Ross, it just isnt going to happen. It would be like you falling in love with a cat.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey, buddy. Hows my favorite dog, huh? Hows my favorite dog? (the dog doesnt move) Youre subdued. (to Joey) Did you give him a beer?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Will you excuse us, we need to talk for a moment.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, sure. Go ahead. (pause) Oh, me, right!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Hes miserable! What happened to him?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Nothing. We just talked about stuff.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What stuff?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Rachel stuff.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "OhJoey, you bummed him out! This was the happiest dog in the world, and he spends half a day with you, and look at him!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hes breathing!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, Im going to take him back to Wendys.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, no, no, no! Hes fine! Look, look, look! (picks up the ball) Heres your ball! Get your ball! Get your ball! (he throws the ball and it bounces right next to the dog) Get your ball! My God, what have I done to you, huh? I broke the dog! Pheebs, I broke the dog!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Well, Im, uh, going to pick up Mona. What have you got going tonight?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, Ive got big Valentines plans! Ive got my Chinese food on the way, and the rest of your saltwater taffy!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yknow, its interesting! Most people think thats made with seawater, when in fact", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ross, we actually watched the documentary together.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Ooh! My Chinese food! Let me get my cash! (runs to her room to get her money)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(opening the door to see Mona standing there) Mona? What arehi! What are you doing here? Im, um, supposed to pick you up!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(he makes some really weird noise hear that sounds kind of like)Ayyyayyyy!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(entering) Oh, hey, Mona!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "I have no idea!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ill be watching TV if anybody needs me. (exits to her room)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Uhlately, she just likes hanging out here.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I think shes lonely.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "I know.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "No, no. Shes way to emotional. And by emotional I mean crazy.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Im not here! Thats just my Chinese food!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Mm-hmm. Shesshes emotional, but, but ballsy.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You know what Im going to do? Im going to get in my sweats, and eat this in bed! (exits)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "And you thought she was going to be in our way! So, why dont you, uh, open the champagne, and Ill be right back. Ive got a surprise for you.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(fakes a laugh) Please start drinking! (exits)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(entering) Im just going to grab the phone.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, Im sorry! Do you need the phone?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(as Ross enters with a present) But, but, Mona, I live here.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(handing Mona the present) Happy Valentines Day! Or something to remember me by.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "How long has it been this time?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "90 seconds.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thats better. 90 seconds is a long time not to think about itexcept all I did was think about it.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You know, it haunts me? Up til now, the worst thing I ever saw, was my father doing tequila shots off the naked houseboy. After this, I would gladly make that my screensaver!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, well, we have to get past this! Why dont we get rid of the tape and pretend it never existed?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I can do that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Okay. Now all weve got to do is get rid of this chair.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, thank God!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I know!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Come in!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Hi! Im so sorry to barge in on your Valentines, but I had to get away from all the yelling. Mona is dumping Ross.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, my God.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Poor Ross.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, great. We have to watch him do yoga in his underwear, but for this he closes the drapes!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Rach, you know that birthing tape you wanted to see? Its here.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, and we should warn you, before you watch it", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Why? You saw it? Is it scary?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, lets just say its ironic how footage of someone being born can make you want to kill yourself.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, but I will leave a sweater that smells like me right next to you!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Cmon, seriously, you guys, youre not going to make me watch this alone!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Shes rightof course not. Honey, get the tape.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(with his arm all the way under the cushion, moving it around) This reminds me of a very specific part of the tape. (Chandler puts the tape in, and they all sit down) Okay, here we go.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. (watching the tape) Ooh, my! (Rachel jumps when the woman starts screaming) Woah! Why is that baby torturing that woman?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Why have I seen this thing three times?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Itsstill beautiful.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uh! Its horrible!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I know! I know, Im so sorry for you!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, my God!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Wait, you guys, look!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What? Did her ass explode?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, the babys out! Look, look!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, look at those little fingers and toes!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "And look how happy the mom is now!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "OhRach!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, screw you guys, you dont have to do it!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Hey, hey, man!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey, whats up?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "UhMona just dumped me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, man, Im sorry. Why?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, with everything thats been going on lately, I havent exactly been the perfect boyfriend. You know, I, uh, I didnt tell her I got Rachel pregnant. I gave her a key to my apartment, and then had the locks changed! And then I lied to her about Rachel moving in with me. In a way, I actually judge her for not breaking up with me sooner, you know?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Still, that really sucks, man. Especially on Valentines Day.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah. Wait a minute. What are you doing here? Joey Tribbiani without a date on Valentines Day? Whats going on, huh? Girl trouble?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Sort of.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Really?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You dont have to seem so happy about it.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, sorry. Well, look, maybe I can help you with it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, II d", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey, whatever it is, I am sure it has happened to me. Yknow, actually onceonce I got dumped during sex.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Anyway, so, uh, so what is it?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Forget about it. Its no big deal.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Cmon! Joey! What is it?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Its nothing.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey, hey, its me. Why cant you tell me?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, uhsit down. (they do) Um theres this woman that I like. A lot. But, uhit cant happen.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Shes not a Tribbiani?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I knew it. So, is she someone from work?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yes.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, uh, does she like you?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Sometimes I think maybe she could. But it doesnt matter, because I cant do anything about it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Why not?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. Someone from work, too. And I could never do that to the guy, because were really good friends.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he still in love with her?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No. I dont think so.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. Um is he a good guy?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, hes the best.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I dont know.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joey, its worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I do! So much! I cant stop thinking about her! I cant sleep, I", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Im going touhIm going to, um, put the bourbon in it at home.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh, yeah.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Anyway seriously, uhjustjust talk to the guy, okay? And tell me how it goes. (walks towards the door until)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Its Rachel.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(thinking) Youre going to have a baby, and you need to be prepared. Now, youre going to make yourself watch the whole thing. Just do it! (Rachel puts the tape in the VCR)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(thinking) Hmmmaybe it starts with how she gets pregnant.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Theres this woman, that I like. A lot. Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. And I could never do that to the guy, yknow? Ccause were really good friends.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he a good guy?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, hes the best.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I dont know.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joey, its worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I do! So much! I cant stop thinking about her! I cant sleep, I", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself. (Walks towards the door until)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Its Rachel.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(closes the door) Did you umIm sorry, did you just say its Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yes.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Um, youyou like Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yes. I like Rachel.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Rachel?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(startled) Yeah, okay but look, buy uhHey-hey, yknow, yknow who else I like? You! And it-it doesnt get said enough. I like you Ross.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "But R-R-Rachel-Rachel?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, but its not a big deal.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Its not a big deal? Oh, Im sorry I justum, Iwhat about all the stuff you-you just said? I mean how about, I likeyou-you cant stop thinking about her. Like how you cant sleep?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im an actor, yknow? As-as a group, we tend to be over dramatic.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Rachel whos carrying my baby? Rachel?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Look no, I-I know its bad, and I know its wrong. Okay? But-but its not like anythings ever gonna happen. Yknow? These-these are just feelings, theyre gonna go away.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yknow what? I-I gotta go. (Starts to leave.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh come on Ross! Hey Ross-Ross dont", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(stops) I justyknowI-I just have oneRachel?!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh-oh! Okay, shes kicking!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh! (Puts his hand on her belly.) Shes growing inside you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Whoa!!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh! (Pulls his hand away.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Wow that was a big one.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I think thats the youngest girl ever to reject me.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Oh hey you guys!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh hey!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hi!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey listen let me ask you, do you believe in soul mates?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh yes I do. I do. I believe that there is one perfect person out there for everyone. And do you know how you find him? You stop looking for him. Thats why I stopped looking for Russell Crowe. Hell find me.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-huh, (To Chandler) and you?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No. I mean I believe that uh, certain people are more suited for each other and I believe in falling in love, but soul mates, I dont think they exist.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, good.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Why?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well last night, I met Monicas.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, I had a date with this guy, and I swear to God, he is her other half.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Come on, dont be crazy. (To Rachel) You dont think theres someone out there better suited for Monica than me, do ya? (Rachel looks at him.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(To Phoebe) Well, whats he like?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well hes tall.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-huh.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "He has brown hair.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Of course, of course.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "A tall guy with hair similar to mine, oh unknowable universe!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "He works with food!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh sure. Older?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Obviously, and hes British.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, I was just gonna ask!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah? And, hes-hes so centered and mature and confident.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, its so sad they never had a chance to meet.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Luckily, the guy she settled for cant hear what youre talking about.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh, Im so sorry. Um, and maybe Im wrong! I butyknow Im gonna go out with him again, Ill find out more.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "You believe that this guy is destined for someone else and youre still gonna date him?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, he may not be my soul mate, but a girls gotta eat.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Hey.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I just talked to Joey, I justI want to see how you were.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh yknow, I stillI cant believe it. Joey and Rachel I mean its Its like you and me going out, only weirder!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right, I know youre hurting, and-and I want to be supportive, but dont say that again.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God! What if, what if they get married? Then hed be the stepfather of my child.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey, I dont think thats something we need to worry about! First of all hes-hes never gonna tell her how he feels about her. And even if he did you have no idea how shed react.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Sure, because women never like Joey. Yknow, I think hes a virgin.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joeyhes not even thinking about going after Rachel!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hes not?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No! All hes thinking about is how youre taking this! I mean, listen its totally freaking him out. Hes talking about moving to Vermont.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Why?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "He says he wants to leave the country. (Pause) He thinks you hate him.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hate him? I No, I dont hate him. (Pause) Its just its Rachel, yknow?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey I cant even imagine how hard this must be for you. But, I dont want you to lose Joey over it. And right now he just needs to know that youre still his friend.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay. Okay, Ill talk to him.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right. Now do it soon, he just asked me how to convert his dollars into Vermont money.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh! Hi!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hi!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Umm, Chandler, Monica, this is Don.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(mouths to Chandler) Soul mate.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(mouths to Phoebe) What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(cough talks) Soul mate.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So, what have you guys been doing?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I know! What is this, 1985?!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Not really.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Whats wrong with sun-dried tomatoes? (Everyone stares at him.) On a barbecue chicken pizza? (Still theres staring.) No?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So Don, what-what other restaurants do you like?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh my God! Thats my restaurant, Im the chef there.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "No!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, Id like a latte. Oh yknow what? If youre gonna talk about me, Im gonna go with you.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "What are you doing?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Nothing! I swear to God I didnt know you guys would be here! And the good news is you didnt believe in soul mates. So", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I believe in tall, handsome strangers who hit on my wife!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Theyre just talking, and yknow what? Just because I think theyre soul mates doesnt mean anythings gonna happen.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(returning) Phoebe, good work.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah! Oh hes great, I love him. (Walks away and Chandler glares at Phoebe.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Dont worry, well find you someone else.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Hey.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Look, I understand if you came by to hit me, I deserve it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, I dont want to hit you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh what then? Kick me?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(getting worried) Bite me?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, no I dont want to do anything to you. All right? I just want to tell you that Im not mad at you andand that I certainly do not hate you. I just, I just came here to say that. (Starts to leave.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh nowHey Ross-Ross! Do you wanna-wanna come in for a beer or something?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uhyeah sure. (Enters.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Do uh, do you got any beer? All-all I got is this melon stuff that Rachel left. I dont", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(pouring two glasses) Hey look Ross, you need to understand something okay? I uhI am never gonna act on this Rachel thing, okay? I-I would never do anything to jeopardize my friendship with you. (He hands Ross a glass.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thank you.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Anyway, it uhlook itll justtake me a while to get over her, thats all. Im not even sure how to do that, I mean Ive never been in love before so", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?! Youre in love with her.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, I thought you knew that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Umm, no.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Wow. Hey look, if it helps, I dont want to feel this way. Honest. I just keep thinking, \"Ah, Ill get over this.\" Yknow? I justIt just keeps gettin harder. I dont, I dont know what to do. Yknow? What do I do?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I think you need to tell her how you feel.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay thats the green stuff talkin.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, Im serious. You-you need to find out where she is, because if shes not where you are, then you can start to move past this.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "But what if uhand Im not saying she will beBut", "role": "user" }, { "content": "If she is where you are then uhthen my feeling weird about it shouldnt stand in the way.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Are you sure?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah. Look if-if shes gonna end up with somebody else, the truth is she couldnt find a better guy. So", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey thanks.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So when do you think youre gonna talk to her?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God I have to tell her! I havent even thought about what I will say. What should I say?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Im understanding, but lets not get carried away.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im sorry, youre right. What am I gonna say? (He takes another sip of the green stuff and recoils at the taste.) Oh!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, tell me about it. (He stands up, turns his back to Joey, and enjoys another sip.)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Cheese you say? Thats some pretty smelly work, huh Don?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Cheese, its smelly. You must smell a lot of the time too.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Me too! Yeah, Chandler cant stand it. He wont even allow me to have blue cheese in the house.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "You know what Id love to do? I would like to go to France and eat nothing but bread and cheeseNot even bread, just cheese. No, I want the bread. Yeah. Ah, and pastries (Breathlessly) And pate. Oh, Im really not high, its just I used to be fat.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Is it made of cheese?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Id move in tomorrow!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(disgusted) Oh come on! (To Phoebe) Are you listening to this?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Im so sorry.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What do we do?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont know, they both want to live in a house of cheese! I dont know how you fight that.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Okay. Okay, I can do this. I can tell her how I feel. Just uh, just stand up straight. (Does so.) Take a couple deep breaths. (Does so.) Look confident. (Does so as Rachel opens the door and startles him.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joey? Whats up?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I uh, I just came by because I-I want to talk to you about something.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay whats up?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Here? In the hall? What are we animals?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well honey, Im late for a meeting. So can you just make it quick?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay umm, I just came by to tell you that Iwant to have dinner with you tonight. Thats all.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Sure! That sounds great! Just leave me a message and tell me where to meet you. Okay? (Walks away.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay. Thats good. Okay, that give you a couple hours to prepare what youre gonna say. Good. Yeah. (Someone comes out of his apartment and it startles Joey again.) Dont you people ever knock?!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Id like to have Don and Phoebe over. Wouldnt that be nice?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Sure, why dont you set it up. Ill just be over here, browsing through the personals.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Are you okay? Youve been acting weird all afternoon.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, fine. Fine. Not perfect!! But good enough.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Jeez! What is with you?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im sorry, did you say cheese?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right, whats going on?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Phoebe thinks you and Don are soul mates, and I dont believe in that kind of stuff. But then you two totally get along. So look, I wont stand in your way if you want to run off with Don and live in a house of cheese.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Chandler, you dont believe in soul mates?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No. But Im sure (mimics Don) tomatoes does.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont believe in soul mates either.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You dont?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No. I dont think that you and I were destined to end up together. I think that we fell in love and work hard at our relationship. Some days we work really hard.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So youyou dont want to live with Don in a cheese house?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No, Ive had second thoughts about that. Do you realize how hard that would be to clean?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I love you.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I know.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yknow what? I am going to take you out to dinner tonight. I found this place that makes the greatest mozzarella sticks and jalepino poppers . (Monica doesnt look impressed.) No? Really? They taste so good.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What? Yeah! Sure! Uh, look at the uh, the reason(Exhales slowly)Is it hot in here?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "No. Not-not for me, but why dont you take off your sweater?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I would, but this is a nice place and my T-shirt has a picture of Calvin doing Hobbs.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh my God! Really?! Can I see it?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah. Sure. (They both half stand up, Joey pulls the neck of his sweater out, and Rachel looks down it to see his T-shirt.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Huh. Wow, I wouldnt think Hobbs would like that so much.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uh How long have we known each other?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Um, sevene-e-eight, eight years. Wow.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Uh-huh, long time.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "But over the past few weeks", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Actually uh, could you give us a second?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "So you were saying?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Im not quite sure.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, well you had asked me how long we had known each other, and I said, \"Eight years.\" And the um, waiter came over and cut his tip in half, and ummnow here we are.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, here we are. Uhh I I think Imfalling in love with you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(stunned) What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Im falling in love with you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(looking around) Who are you talking too? Oh, youre kidding! Oh, its a joke! (Laughs.) Its funny. Its funny. I dont get it. (Joey doesnt say any thing and Rachel realizes its not a joke.) Oh. (Pause) Okay. Umm I-Iuh, wow. Are you uh How did umm When?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Does it really matter?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Wow! Wow. Wow. Wow, it is hot in here.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay look Rach, I know this is a lot. You dont have to say anything. You-you uh, you take as much time as you need. (Long pause as Rachel says nothing.) Okay, you gotta say something!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Joey, Joey I love you so much, but I", "role": "user" }, { "content": "But. (Hangs his head down.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Joey.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah-yeah right. Thats okay. Thats fine. Thats uh, pretty much what I was expecting. So uh, its no big deal. All right? I think Im gonna go. (Stands up.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No! Joey please! Please dont! Please dont leave like this! Now come on, you cannot do this to a pregnant woman! (Starts to cry.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Dont start doing that. You cant do that Rach, cause then youre gonna make me do that. (Starts to cry.) Oh, here we go! (Sits down next to her.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Can I? (Hug him.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Sure!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh Joey honey I dontI dont want to lose", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey-hey-hey, hey! You cant. Okay? Ever!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im so sorry.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh no-no Rach, please, dont be sorry. Okay? Dont be sorry. (They hug again.) Yknow I was only kidding you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, that was a real good one.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Joey? Are you in there?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "(hearing Rachel and jumping up with his plate) Oh God! Thats Rachel!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Joey, you have to talk to her!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No-no, I cant! I cant! Not after the other night, its just itstoo weird, okay? Dont tell her Im here! (Turns to run to the bathroom and his bagel falls off the plate onto the floor.) Dont eat that! (Runs to the bathroom as Rachel enters.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey Rachel!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Is Joey here?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont see him. (To Monica) Do you see him?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I dont see him. Hey! Maybe hes in the sugar bowl! (Opens the sugar bowl) Joey? Nope! (Closes the sugar bowl and they both laugh.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, at least you make each other laugh.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Whats up?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, I havent seen him since that night that he told me how he yknow I dont know, I think hes avoiding me. Why is that bagel on the floor?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "We were playing a game.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ew, was Chandler naked? Sort of like a, like a ring toss kind of situation?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Sure.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?! No! No!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "All right. Well listen, if you see Joey will you just tell him uhtell him I miss him. (Exits and Joey enters.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(To Joey) Okay, did you hear that?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, a naked bagel game? (Picks up his dropped bagel.) (To Chandler) Dude, I dont know. Thats a pretty small hole.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey, you gotta talk to her.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I cant! Yknow? You guys dont know what its like to put yourself out there like that and just get shot down.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(incredulous) I dont know what thats like?! Up until I was 25 I thought the only response to, \"I love you,\" was, \"Oh crap!\"", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hello? No rejection? I got shot down at fat camp! Boy, kids are mean when theyre hungry.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "All right so, so what do I do?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "This is Rachel. I mean, what are you gonna do, never going to talk to her again? I mean I know its weird, its awkward, but you gotta at least try.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah. Okay. (Goes to take a bite out of the previously mentioned bagel.) Whoa! (Stops.) I almost forgot this was on your", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(interrupting him) We didnt play it!!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Okay, so when youre done with your tea Ill look at your leaves and tell you your fortune.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I didnt know you read tea leaves.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh yeah, Ive done it for years. I actually stopped because I was so accurate. Yknow, and-and yknow, one of the great joys of life is its-its wondrous unpredictability. Yknow? And also tea tends to give me the trots.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, Im done. Read mine.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. (Looks at the leaves.) Ooh, I see a ladder. (Checks the book) Which can mean either a promotion or a violent death.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(stunned) I-Im the head chef. I-I cant get promoted.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm, whos next?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, Im done. Do mine.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. (Reads the leaves) Umm, oh! Okay, I see a circle.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ah.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh! (Checking the book) Which can either mean youre having a baby or youre gonna make a scientific discovery!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, I have been spending a lot of time in the lab.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What does yours say Pheebs?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Umm Wow, all right. (Checks the book.) Wow! Yay! Ooh, Im gonna meet a guy! And really soon! And hes gonna be the man of my dreams. Probably not the guy I had a dream about last night. (Points at Chandler.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey! Has anyone seen my shirt? Its a button down, like a, like a faded salmon?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You mean your pink shirt?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Faded salmon color.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "No, I-I havent seen your pink shirt.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Great! Great. Then I mustve left it at Monas. I knew it!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, Im sure you get another one at Ann Taylors.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thats my favorite shirt! Okay? I love that shirt!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well just ask Mona to give it back!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I dont know. I mean I-I guess I could. Its just that we didnt really end things such good terms. And if I go over there Id be ignoring the one thing she asked me to do when we broke up, jump up my own ass and die. (Walks away.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(noticing a guy sitting by the green post looking at her) Oh wait a second you guysfor the last couple weeks Ive been that guy everywhere I go. We take the same bus. We go to the same bookstore, the same dry cleaners; maybe hes the tea guy. (He gets up to leave, and smiles at Phoebe.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Phoebe, did you see that?! He totally checked you out! He is so cute! (Looking at his tea.) Mine has a picture of The Village People, what does that mean?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Hi!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Hi.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hi.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Tea gives Phoebe the trots.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "So I thought Joey and I would be okay once we hung out, but its not even like we know how to be with each other anymore.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know its tough now, but things will get better.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "How do you know that? What if it just gets worse and worse and worse, to the point where we cant even be in the same room with each other?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Im not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Some cheese?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey, what is the Bruce Springsteen CD in the Kat Stevens case?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Lets just say if I cant find the right CD case I just put it in the nearest one.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, where is the Kat Stevens CD?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "In the James Taylor case.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Where is the James Taylor CD?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Honey, Im gonna save you some time, 200 CDs, not one of them in the right case.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay. No need to panic. Deep breathes everyone. Okay umm uh, were just gonna have to spend some time and put the CDs in the right cases.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Well, if were gonna do that we should come up with some kind of order. Yknow alphabetically or by genre?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hmm, I dont know. We really have to talk this through.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh my God!! You guys have such problems!! I feel so terrible for you!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay, I-Im sorry. You and Joey, your both focusing on this uncomfortable thing, what you need to do is to change the subject. Next time you see him try to get him talking about something else.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh yeah. That makes sense.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, like I dont know, maybe you have a work problem that you need his advice on.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Ooh, I can do that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Good. (To Chandler) Uh honey, the Miami Vice soundtrack? Really?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "They were just giving those away at the store (off Monicas look) in exchange for money.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Hi.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Uh I really dont know what to tell you Rach, I really dont. I mean, maybe Joey can help you out with your, with your big work problem.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah Joey shesRachels got this really big work problem, and it is a head scratcher. Wow! (To Chandler) Yknow what, if were gonna make dinner were gonna have to leave. Yeah. (She and Chandler exit.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So you uh, have abig work problem?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah its umm Yeah its uh It-its yknowIts nothing.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Huh. Okay. (Awkward silence.) So uh, I think Im gonna take off.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "YeahNo wait! Joey no wait it is. Its something. Its-its ummits my boss.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah, and umm my baby.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "My boss wants to buy my baby!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What?! Oh my-oh my God!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I know I told you, its a really big problem.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "What he wants to buy your baby?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Can you believe that?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Thats crazy!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thats what I told him!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Okay, how did this even happen?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well Ill tell ya! (Pause) See uh my-my boss and his wifeThey-they cant have children. So umm, and thatwe were at the Christmas party, and he got drunk, and he said to me, \"Rachel, I want to buy your baby.\"", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Man! When you said it was a problem about your boss and the baby I figured it was something about maternity leave.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ohh! Yeah! (Pause) Yeah that-that wouldve been a much simpler problem.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh hello.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh Jim, Jim Nelson Im Phoebe, Phoebe Buffay. We certainly have been seeing a lot of each other lately.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Well, maybe we will. (Starts to walk away.) Oh! (She turns around and the exchange information.)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Mona? (Theres no answer, so he starts to leave but remembers where her extra key is. He reaches atop a hall light just outside her door and grabs the key. He looks at in triumph as the pain from it being hot moves along his nervous system to his brain, and when it arrives his brain orders his hand to drop the hot key and his mouth to squeal in pain. After dropping the key he pulls his shirtsleeve over his hand and uses the key to open the door and enter Monas apartment.) Okay, if I were a salmon shirt, where would I be? (He hears a key in the door and as it opens he dives behind the couch.)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh my God, honey we are so meant to be together. We both have copies of the Annie soundtrack.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Honey, both yours.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey! Great advice on that Joey thing!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Yeah? The work problem?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh it was perfect! I mean it really felt like he was my friend again.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What problem did you tell him you had?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Oh thats not important. The point is, I reallyI think everythings gonna be okay.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Do you think you can just buy my friends baby?!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Isnt it funny how we kept running into each other? Its as if someone really wants us to be together.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, witty banter. Well done.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh okay, well Im a masseuse, and I used to work at this place", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I-I-I like, I like parties.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Yeah I guess, a little.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(a little freaked out) So! Umm, anyway I-I lived in New York, someone wildly I guess, for ummWell since I was fourteen.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh stop it.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Okay. Umm look, youre coming on a little strong. But Im going to give you the benefit of the doubt, because it seems the universe really wants to be together. So, why dont we just start over okay? And you can just tell me about yourself.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Okay.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "What?!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh my God!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Wow! You do?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "All right. (Gets up and walks out.)", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "(singing) The sunll come outtomorrow! Betyour bottom dollar that tomorrow (The girls start laughing, and in a deep voice) therell be sun.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(entering) Hey!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey! Oh Joey, honey listen, thank you for talking to my yesterday about that thing with my boss. That really meant a lot.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Not a problem. Oh, and just so you know, that guys not going to be bothering you about that baby thing anymore.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(worried) What?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Lets just say I took care of it.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Whoa-whoa-whoa, lets say more!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Dont worry! Dont worry. I just told him, very nicely, \"You dont go buying peoples babies, so back off!!\"", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "No! No, no-no-no Joey he doesnt want to buy my baby! I made that up!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?! Why?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "So that we would have something to talk about! So it wouldnt be awkward!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "And you couldnt think of anything else?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You said your boss wants to buy your baby?!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(To Joey) I cant believe that you yelled at my boss! Im-Im gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You can always sell your baby.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh Joey, I cant believe you brought my boss into this! Im gonna get fired!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "You lied to me!", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Well, she told me too! (Points to Monica and Joey glares at her.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Chandler has two copies of Annie!", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Hello!!", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Not touching myself if that makes anyone less uncomfortable.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Morning. You wanted to see me?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Okay look Mr. Zelner", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Yeah. (Motions for him to continue.)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh God.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Well, as long as we are clear about that. (Exits smugly.)", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh there it is.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Thats not your regular dry cleaners.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "I know, but that creep that I went on that date with goes to there so I have to find a new one. I also have to find a new video store, a new bank, a new adult bookstore, a new grocery store", "role": "user" }, { "content": "What?!", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "A new grocery store. The universe said I was going to meet a nice guy and thats what they gave me? (Looks up) When I get up there Im going to kick some ass.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Dont worry Phoebe, youre gonna meet someone. If I can meet a great guy, so can you.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah, we both can. And we both will.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh, you didnt have to come in with me.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Are you kidding? This is where they get out stains! Okay? This is like Disneyland for me. Im-Im gonna be over here watching the dance of the clean shirts. (She points to and walks over to the electric clothes rack they have.)", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Okay.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "What?", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "Oh yeah well, Im sorry about that too, but what are you going to do?", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "A little. (She turns around and looks up.) (To the universe) Now youre talking.", "role": "user" } ]

[ { "content": "I-I-Id love to. Let me just tell my friend.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "(to the clerk) Ooh, an ink stain! Hey, can I watch how you get this out?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "(looking around) She mustve left.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "Hi.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "So? What-what-what happened?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Its all gonna be okay. Theyre just so happy that Im not suing them that they gave me one extra month paid maternity leave. So long as I understand that the money should not construed as a down payment on this or any other child I should bear.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Wow, Ralph Lauren is really going out of there way to show theyre not in the baby buying business.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Chandler, can you give us a minute?", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Oh Im sorry, youre kicking me out of my own living room?", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Ill be in there. (Goes into the bedroom.)", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Joey, Im really sorry that I lied to you. I was just trying to make things", "role": "user" }, { "content": "I know. I know.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "It kinda worked. I mean yknow, I dont know about you buy I havent thought about our thing since all this.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Hey youre right. Yeah, its kinda been like us again a little bit.", "role": "assistant" }, { "content": "Yeah I know! I miss that.", "role": "user" }, { "content": "Me too. I mean Ihavent thought at all about how I put myself out there and said all that stuff and how you didnt feel the same way about me and-and how it was really awkward.", "role": "assistant" } ]

[ { "content": "My gynecologist tried to kill me.", "role": "user" } ]