text string | humour_label int64 | language string |
|---|---|---|
what do you do when a chemistry teacher dies? barium | 1 | en |
How to bring pacman to life Scratch your head and think of the Wakas. Soon you'll see pacman while brushing your teeth | 0 | en |
It is a little known fact that the Bermuda Triangle used to be called the Bermuda Rectangle. Until one side mysteriously disappeared | 1 | en |
I really want to buy one of those grocery store check out dividers... But the lady behind the counter keeps putting it back. | 0 | en |
What did the boys do ToGetHer? Roam And Tick things.. | 0 | en |
just checked weather . if anyone is curious what's in my wardrobe, find me tomorrow . i will be wearing every article of clothing i own . | 1 | en |
My girlfriend wanted a so we got one They've been going at it for too long now | 0 | en |
Why was Albert Einstein's dad afraid to teach him vowels? Because everytime he tried, he kept owing his son money! | 0 | en |
Why was the physicist being so careful not to insult his colleague's choice of generalized coordinates and momentum? He was just minding his Ps and Qs. | 1 | en |
What did the Golden Gate bridge say to the Golden Gate river when they broke up? I'm over you. | 0 | en |
i tried to catch some fog. but i mist | 0 | en |
for lent i've decided to give up my new year's resolutions, now pass the girl scout cookies . | 0 | en |
How do you keep a blonde busy for years? Tell her to count the stairs on an escalator. | 0 | en |
Corrected: What do you call India's top TV Show? Dan Singh with the Sitars | 1 | en |
Where did the farmer find his missing baby horse? In the foliage. | 0 | en |
YouTube is the nicest company ever. They just want to even the playing field so their competitors have a chance to catch up to them | 1 | en |
I'm so terrified of asking my wife to clean up after cooking breakfast that... I've been walking on eggshells all day long! | 0 | en |
If I had a dollar for every gender. I'd have two dollars | 1 | en |
What's a surfers favorite move A Sandy Hook | 1 | en |
What's Michael J. Fox's favorite drink? a milkshake | 0 | en |
Ever since Jim got cancer, he's been feeling really crabby | 0 | en |
Tried to phone the huge thumb helpline. Dialled the wrong number. | 0 | en |
what is the smallest mall? small ! | 0 | en |
Who's in charge of all the liquid measurements? The liter. | 1 | en |
when i was young i was scared of the dark. now when i see my electricity bill i am scared of the lights | 1 | en |
The food in our school canteen is perfect. If your a bug! | 1 | en |
What's an Xbox fanboys' least favourite film? P.S. I Love You | 0 | en |
I just gave my new secretary a sexy dress for her first week's salary. Next week, I'm going to raise her salary | 1 | en |
Old musicians don't die. They just decompose | 1 | en |
what does a tornado and a woman have in common? it starts with a little blowing but at the end your house is gone | 0 | en |
Why do fireman take out the people from building before they put the fire out by water? Because bros before hose. | 1 | en |
What does s funeral and wedding have in common After the ceremony a stiff gets buried | 1 | en |
What makes a salami excited? When the ham is cured! | 0 | en |
really? everybody was kung fu fighting | 1 | en |
what do you call a kid who tells bad jokes? a redditor | 1 | en |
what do you get when you cross an insomniac , an agnostic , and a dyslexic? someone who stays up all night , wondering if there is a dog . | 1 | en |
Mercury Remember when Freddie Mercury said,"Don't stop me now"? Guess nobody did. | 1 | en |
Q: How do you make a trombone sound like a french horn? A: Stick your hand in the bell and play lots of wrong notes. | 0 | en |
as a german i have to ask : you know what really grinds my gears? nothing . our engineering is perfect . | 1 | en |
What do you call the excessive bleeding after an abortion or miscarriage? The fountain of youth | 1 | en |
love is blind, said the blind to the deaf i can see that . | 0 | en |
I don't have a sense of entitlement. but I deserve one | 0 | en |
i used to think no one cared what i have to say. then i joined reddit now i know it's true | 0 | en |
I went to a blind tasting session the other day. It was a waste of time, they tasted the same as people who can see | 1 | en |
hey kevin , why do you like fungi on your pizza? cause i'm a vegetarian . | 0 | en |
I need to order faster internet then :D Lag makes you violent, not the games :D | 0 | en |
The colour you see when you close your eyes Yeah same as those people that you think about autobot | 1 | en |
What is Chris Brown's favorite cooking appliance? A Black and Decker | 0 | en |
i went to a wedding for two antennae The ceremony was pretty bad, but the reception was amazing | 1 | en |
My friend abandoned me because I'm insecure No wait, he's back. He just went to get some water. | 0 | en |
What is a creationist's favorite button in pokemon? B to cancel evolution | 0 | en |
My aunts zodiac sign was cancer funny, the way she died... Killed by a giant crab | 0 | en |
do you know why women love zombies? because zombies love what's on the inside , not the outside ! | 1 | en |
A person went to the firing range It was a teacher only day | 1 | en |
What is the most common educational degree in New Mexico? Kindergarten dropout. | 1 | en |
toast i'd like to propose a toast, but i'm all out of bread . | 1 | en |
What becomes packed between periods? School Hallways | 1 | en |
Hate it when you open the fridge and can't find what you were looking for; like happiness and perfect abs. | 0 | en |
what did the atlantic say to the pacific? nothing . it just waved . | 1 | en |
when i wake up every morning , things always go well. i'm like the optimistic amputee who always starts his day off on the right foot | 1 | en |
HR: Can you explain this. Me: I thought it was CORNhub, with recipes on how to make delicious corn and corn related dishes | 0 | en |
Puns leave me numb. Mathematical puns leave me number | 1 | en |
what's the difference in a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants? you should know , you've only read it twenty times . | 0 | en |
Sequencing. What's the key to a good joke? | 0 | en |
Did you hear about the butcher who backed into his saw? He got a little behind in his business. | 1 | en |
what do you call a dwarf psychic on the run? a small medium at large . | 1 | en |
How did Hellen Keller break her arm? Reading a sign on the highway | 0 | en |
how many canadians does it take to change a light bulb? none , they don't change light bulbs , they accept them the way they are . | 1 | en |
Me: Woohoo, I survived Thanksgiving! I can relax now. Anxiety: Haha...Christmas. | 0 | en |
hy haven't you ever seen any elephants hiding up trees? Because they're really, really good at it. | 1 | en |
Humor is a serious thing. I like to think of it as one of our greatest natural resources which must be preserved at all costs | 1 | en |
what's the best thing to bring to your holiday party? a christmas tree . because they're lit . | 1 | en |
Kennedy can drive a dodge But he can't dodge a bullet | 0 | en |
When I got divorced, we split the house. I got the outside | 1 | en |
I don't care that i can't scrape cheese. I have grater problems to worry about. | 0 | en |
Four out of five dentists recommend brushing to deal with plaque. The other one recommends attaching a lion head to it | 1 | en |
Learn to solve your problems like a constipated mathematician. Just work it out with a pencil | 0 | en |
i just realized we cook bacon and bake cookies, get it together english . | 0 | en |
What's the difference between a Snickers and my girlfriend? Snickers satisfies. | 1 | en |
Come over to the Nerd side. We have Pi | 0 | en |
what do you call an english teacher who used to have anxiety? past tense . | 1 | en |
did you hear about the murder of the door maker? the police said it was an open and shut case . | 1 | en |
When Egypt had no internet, it was called Gypt. | 1 | en |
I have to give up spreadsheets for forty days. Excellent. | 0 | en |
My wife just told me to put the toilet seat down. I don't know why I was carrying it around in the first place | 1 | en |
Why did Kevin's Ice cream fall down? Because he was hit by a truck | 0 | en |
Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven acht nein. | 0 | en |
anyone hungry? i read there's some leftover cat . | 0 | en |
I dont trust atoms. I heard they make up everything | 0 | en |
what's the best thing about switzerland? i don't know , but their flag is a big plus . | 1 | en |
A Frenchman walks into a library and asks for a book on warfare. The librarian tells him he'll only lose it | 1 | en |
Once you hit the speed of light... Once you hit the speed of light, you have infinite mass. So you know what? That's my problem: I'm not fat, I'm fast. | 1 | en |
Did you hear about the guy who cooled himself to absolute zero? He's OK now | 0 | en |
Taco Bell is planning on doubling the 'meat' in their ingredients. Unlike Cadbury, they're informing us in advance | 1 | en |
America, a land. where many people think the moon landings were fake but professional wresting is real | 1 | en |
I like my men like I like my chess players. They know how to make an opening | 1 | en |
what do you get if you cross a dentist and a soldier? a drill sergeant | 1 | en |
What is relationship of Buddhism and reposts. ? When someone starts a joke with Buddhism it will end up with reposts. | 1 | en |
Missed Connection: You were attractive. I awkwardly overreacted to your presence | 0 | en |
" how do you know that god isn't a woman? " because i'm not a sandwich . | 1 | en |
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