subreddit stringclasses 7
values | author stringlengths 3 20 | id stringlengths 5 7 | content stringlengths 67 30.4k | score int64 0 140k |
|---|---|---|---|---|
programmerhumor | KidBeene | ir0tzm7 | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"End of sprint" Always tell them "End of Sprint".<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 343 |
programmerhumor | aaanze | ir11oat | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Good PMs that make dev life easier do exists but they are the minority unfortunately.<|eor|><|sor|>Just curious, what actions would a PM do that make dev life actually easier ?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 328 |
programmerhumor | ObscureGeometry | ir0ujwp | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>And useless meetings<|eor|><|sor|>You mean daily status updates dont motivate you to work harder?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 315 |
programmerhumor | othilious | ir180f8 | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Good PMs that make dev life easier do exists but they are the minority unfortunately.<|eor|><|sor|>Just curious, what actions would a PM do that make dev life actually easier ?<|eor|><|sor|>- Setting expectations with upper management so they dont come breathing down the devs necks every day.
- Knowing a new feature or scope creep will change delivery time and by how much so management doesnt bug devs.
- Sensing how a project is going and can help get new resources if the dev team is stressed.
- Being able to code so they can speak in devs language without needing everything explained like a 5 year old.
- Taking the blame from upper management when things get late.
- Giving out credit when a dev pushes out a new feature in a good amount of time.
I can keep going. A good PM can save a project and keep a team from being dysfunctional.<|eor|><|sor|>I've had good and bad PMs, mostly good thankfully. The PM on my main project is a gift to mankind though. He keeps track of roadmaps and planning, willing to compromise and adjust things based on day-to-day, helps us set reasonable deadlines and manages expectations internally and externally.
Noone sticks with a company forever, so I'm terrified for the day he leaves.
I remember how it was before he joined, and I don't want to go back ...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 294 |
programmerhumor | 1nd1anaCroft | ir1a12u | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>And useless meetings<|eor|><|sor|>Oh my god my last PM (fired, thankfully) once held a planning meeting that was scheduled for an hour but ended up stretching from 1030 to almost 1pm. At the end he posted the summary in Slack and, with zero irony, said "Thanks team! Love the *synergy* we had!"
I almost threw my laptop across the room<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 227 |
programmerhumor | Ninder975 | ir12l3r | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>And useless meetings<|eor|><|sor|>You mean daily status updates dont motivate you to work harder?<|eor|><|sor|>I dont mind my daily status meetings, its pretty much the only interaction I get with my coworkers, and its only half an hour<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 206 |
programmerhumor | aaanze | ir139hx | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Good PMs that make dev life easier do exists but they are the minority unfortunately.<|eor|><|sor|>Just curious, what actions would a PM do that make dev life actually easier ?<|eor|><|sor|>- Setting expectations with upper management so they dont come breathing down the devs necks every day.
- Knowing a new feature or scope creep will change delivery time and by how much so management doesnt bug devs.
- Sensing how a project is going and can help get new resources if the dev team is stressed.
- Being able to code so they can speak in devs language without needing everything explained like a 5 year old.
- Taking the blame from upper management when things get late.
- Giving out credit when a dev pushes out a new feature in a good amount of time.
I can keep going. A good PM can save a project and keep a team from being dysfunctional.<|eor|><|sor|>Sounds like the base job description of a PM to me.
Good to know there isn't a secret ingredient I was not aware of !<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 182 |
programmerhumor | KidBeene | ir0u7h7 | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Scrum master" sounds like an age of sail specialty on a ship
*"I'll have ye scrum all the way to blighty ye scurvy dogs!"*<|eor|><|sor|>Man the JIRA Boards! Raise the story points! The Epic wont sail herself!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 179 |
programmerhumor | fignompe | ir0m805 | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>replace PM with a useless scrum master<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 165 |
programmerhumor | PhunkyPhish | ir0xut5 | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>My PM is absolutely awesome. Shields us from direct contact with other teams that isn't needed, pushes back on tickets to have more details for us, and many other things to 'protect' the team<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 154 |
programmerhumor | throwawaycanadian2 | ir0ya0j | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"End of sprint" Always tell them "End of Sprint".<|eor|><|sor|>Wait - people expect stuff out of sprint? What's the point of sprints then?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 141 |
programmerhumor | michaelsenpatrick | ir23d8m | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Good PMs that make dev life easier do exists but they are the minority unfortunately.<|eor|><|sor|>Just curious, what actions would a PM do that make dev life actually easier ?<|eor|><|sor|>- Setting expectations with upper management so they dont come breathing down the devs necks every day.
- Knowing a new feature or scope creep will change delivery time and by how much so management doesnt bug devs.
- Sensing how a project is going and can help get new resources if the dev team is stressed.
- Being able to code so they can speak in devs language without needing everything explained like a 5 year old.
- Taking the blame from upper management when things get late.
- Giving out credit when a dev pushes out a new feature in a good amount of time.
I can keep going. A good PM can save a project and keep a team from being dysfunctional.<|eor|><|sor|>I've had good and bad PMs, mostly good thankfully. The PM on my main project is a gift to mankind though. He keeps track of roadmaps and planning, willing to compromise and adjust things based on day-to-day, helps us set reasonable deadlines and manages expectations internally and externally.
Noone sticks with a company forever, so I'm terrified for the day he leaves.
I remember how it was before he joined, and I don't want to go back ...<|eor|><|sor|>just follow him. a good manager, like you said, is rare to find. i wish i would have followed my last manager when he switched teams at my company<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 133 |
programmerhumor | MyWorldIsInsideOut | ir1bsoj | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>And useless meetings<|eor|><|sor|>Oh my god my last PM (fired, thankfully) once held a planning meeting that was scheduled for an hour but ended up stretching from 1030 to almost 1pm. At the end he posted the summary in Slack and, with zero irony, said "Thanks team! Love the *synergy* we had!"
I almost threw my laptop across the room<|eor|><|sor|>Zoom knows all meetings should be 40 minutes or less.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 127 |
programmerhumor | dr-freddy-112 | ir13n9g | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>If you don't have servant leaders who are unblocking you and making your job easier, you're at the wrong company.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 120 |
programmerhumor | generatedcode | ir0o6zk | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>replace PM with a useless scrum master<|eor|><|sor|>that was certified in 3 days? after working in call-center for 10 years?
stop thinking you too can do that r/3daysScrumMasterCert<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 117 |
programmerhumor | peckingbird | ir1951a | <|sols|><|sot|>Can you give me an ETA?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3ic1j9b5jsr91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"End of sprint" Always tell them "End of Sprint".<|eor|><|sor|>Wait - people expect stuff out of sprint? What's the point of sprints then?<|eor|><|sor|>The issue is most DMs I've worked with haven't understood what a sprint is.
From experience they tend to use it as a measurement of times, like a month, but different.<|eor|><|sor|>Newbie here. I thought it is a time measurement too. Can you enlighten me?<|eor|><|sor|>A sprint is a set of stories/tickets/tasks (Lingo changes), that you hope to achieve in a given timeframe. It ought to be immutable, except in extentuating circumstances.
It's bound by the timeframe, but not the timeframe itself. If something is not completed by the end of that time, it becomes part of the next sprint.
Thinking of a sprint as a unit of time misses the requirement for the set of stories to be stable, cohesive, and predictable - all of which are important for allowing a team to take ownership of the sprint.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 106 |
programmerhumor | parotta36 | 7eyrbx | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 29,947 |
programmerhumor | dargo60 | dq8d87t | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Oh good, so there is hope!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,856 |
programmerhumor | SurlyDuffBeer | dq8esth | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>You should at least try to credit the original author of the comic, or link to the source:
http://abstrusegoose.com/249<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,122 |
programmerhumor | dc123dc | dq8d8o0 | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>As someone who has been thinking about learning programming skills this has been very informative!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 810 |
programmerhumor | bgeron | dq8f1ea | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Oh good, so there is hope!<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>My suspicion is the C++ committee with their updates are trying to outpace people learning the language, so that you can only fully learn the language _ever_ if you spend more than 40 hours per week learning the language<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 806 |
programmerhumor | Pradfanne | dq8btp1 | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Probably the fastest way too<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 562 |
programmerhumor | Zetacore | dq8gf7z | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>As someone who has been thinking about learning programming skills this has been very informative!<|eor|><|sor|>Hey it's me ur future self.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 439 |
programmerhumor | trwolfe13 | dq8euki | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Now to learn java<|eor|><|sor|>Easy. Its just like that last panel, only on the other side of the knife. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 434 |
programmerhumor | pussyilliterate | dq8csje | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Now to learn java<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 377 |
programmerhumor | marsh-da-pro | dq8f5zf | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Probably the fastest way too<|eor|><|sor|>I mean, you cant complete something in 21 days any faster than in 21 days<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 291 |
programmerhumor | franklyflannel | dq8hb2w | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>As someone who has been thinking about learning programming skills this has been very informative!<|eor|><|sor|>Hey it's me ur future self.<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>top 10 anime betrayals<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 247 |
programmerhumor | marcosdumay | dq8gl46 | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Oh good, so there is hope!<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>My suspicion is the C++ committee with their updates are trying to outpace people learning the language, so that you can only fully learn the language _ever_ if you spend more than 40 hours per week learning the language<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>What The Fuck?!
Are C++ types first class objects already? Have I been free of that language for *that* long? Or are they going to implement metaclasses before they implement actual classes?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 210 |
programmerhumor | podian | dq8gxcf | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Oh good, so there is hope!<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>My suspicion is the C++ committee with their updates are trying to outpace people learning the language, so that you can only fully learn the language _ever_ if you spend more than 40 hours per week learning the language<|eor|><|sor|>The intent is to provide programmers with a sense of pride and accomplishment for learning the language.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 156 |
programmerhumor | beerdude26 | dq8h1uu | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Oh good, so there is hope!<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>My suspicion is the C++ committee with their updates are trying to outpace people learning the language, so that you can only fully learn the language _ever_ if you spend more than 40 hours per week learning the language<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>ELIAspiringCSStudent - why is this bad?<|eor|><|sor|>Looks like C++ is trying to get into the game of letting the programmer build their own data types, but still within the object-oriented paradigm. This appears to provide a few niceties such as compile-time programming, reflection and some other tidbits. But it's still stuck in the object-oriented paradigm.
Some might like it because it allows libraries to provide more high-level constructs than classes allow for. Others may hate it because it means everyone will roll their own high-level constructs that are incompatible with each other.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 128 |
programmerhumor | dylanc404 | dq8d8wc | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Wouldnt that create a paradox? You prevent yourself from inventing the time machine and therefore killing yourself.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 123 |
programmerhumor | socialister | dq8hhu7 | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Oh good, so there is hope!<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>My suspicion is the C++ committee with their updates are trying to outpace people learning the language, so that you can only fully learn the language _ever_ if you spend more than 40 hours per week learning the language<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>What The Fuck?!
Are C++ types first class objects already? Have I been free of that language for *that* long? Or are they going to implement metaclasses before they implement actual classes?<|eor|><|sor|>The latter.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 118 |
programmerhumor | necheffa | dq8kw0r | <|sols|><|sot|>"How to learn programming in 21 Days"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/1fl5yi6bbpzz.png<|eol|><|sor|>Now to learn java<|eor|><|sor|>Easy. Its just like that last panel, only on the other side of the knife. <|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>This is an accurate representation of Enterprise Java in the wild:
https://github.com/EnterpriseQualityCoding/FizzBuzzEnterpriseEdition<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 117 |
programmerhumor | Henrijs85 | m4vkmn | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 29,941 |
programmerhumor | SusheeMonster | gqwh5yv | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Jokes on you clowns, I code in binary. Why take advantage of decades of abstraction and automation when you can reinvent the wheel?
Even this comment was posted through an API call in curl.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 4,404 |
programmerhumor | ComeBackToDigg | gqwgmpt | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a monitor, eh? Call me when you are putting code directly into RAM, like a *real* programmer.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,997 |
programmerhumor | DaemonOwl | gqwlcff | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Jokes on you clowns, I code in binary. Why take advantage of decades of abstraction and automation when you can reinvent the wheel?
Even this comment was posted through an API call in curl.<|eor|><|sor|>You monster<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 897 |
programmerhumor | theDudeMood13 | gqwj0pt | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a monitor, eh? Call me when you are putting code directly into RAM, like a *real* programmer.<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using punch cards, eh? Call me when you start keeping track of each bit using your fingers.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 808 |
programmerhumor | SusheeMonster | gqwozgk | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Jokes on you clowns, I code in binary. Why take advantage of decades of abstraction and automation when you can reinvent the wheel?
Even this comment was posted through an API call in curl.<|eor|><|sor|>You monster<|eor|><|sor|>>*"One man's monstrosity is another man's job security."*
\- Donald Knuth<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 763 |
programmerhumor | 100PercentNotAltAcc | gqwsoqj | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using punch cards, eh? Call me when you start keeping track of each bit using your fingers.<|eor|><|sor|>Still using fingers, eh? Call me when you keep track of bits in your head<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a head, eh? Call me when you've installed your brain in a machine and count the bits with your subconscious.<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a subconscious, eh? Call me when you can use the spin of an electron<|eor|><|sor|>Still using electrons, eh? Call me when you can ship your code on a single quark
*Edit: typo*<|eor|><|sor|>Still using quarks, eh? Call me when you can store your code in the very _gluons_ that hold your quarks together.<|eor|><|sor|>Still using gluons? Call me when you have time because print "Hello World" shows me 12 errors.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 647 |
programmerhumor | TheUndeadBowman | gqwkrtp | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a monitor, eh? Call me when you are putting code directly into RAM, like a *real* programmer.<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using punch cards, eh? Call me when you start keeping track of each bit using your fingers.<|eor|><|sor|>Still using fingers, eh? Call me when you keep track of bits in your head<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 585 |
programmerhumor | FalconFiveZeroNine | gqwmezv | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a monitor, eh? Call me when you are putting code directly into RAM, like a *real* programmer.<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using punch cards, eh? Call me when you start keeping track of each bit using your fingers.<|eor|><|sor|>Still using fingers, eh? Call me when you keep track of bits in your head<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a head, eh? Call me when you've installed your brain in a machine and count the bits with your subconscious.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 530 |
programmerhumor | SusheeMonster | gqx5jhu | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Jokes on you clowns, I code in binary. Why take advantage of decades of abstraction and automation when you can reinvent the wheel?
Even this comment was posted through an API call in curl.<|eor|><|sor|>Nice! I used to be more proficient in interpreting binary than I am now. Told a first date that I could read binary. A few weeks later, he told me he loved me in binary. Ten years later, we still embrace tech geekery and we're going to teach our daughter to program one day. Binary for the win. <|eor|><|sor|>yeah but what if your child is non-binary?
​
checkmate, liberals<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 507 |
programmerhumor | Marmalain | gqwnwld | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a monitor, eh? Call me when you are putting code directly into RAM, like a *real* programmer.<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using punch cards, eh? Call me when you start keeping track of each bit using your fingers.<|eor|><|sor|>Still using fingers, eh? Call me when you keep track of bits in your head<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a head, eh? Call me when you've installed your brain in a machine and count the bits with your subconscious.<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a subconscious, eh? Call me when you can use the spin of an electron<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 463 |
programmerhumor | __Cmason__ | gqwq3bi | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I like to work smart not hard. I use an IDE with code completion to make my life easier.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 441 |
programmerhumor | sir_pedr | gqwozof | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a monitor, eh? Call me when you are putting code directly into RAM, like a *real* programmer.<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Still using punch cards, eh? Call me when you start keeping track of each bit using your fingers.<|eor|><|sor|>Still using fingers, eh? Call me when you keep track of bits in your head<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a head, eh? Call me when you've installed your brain in a machine and count the bits with your subconscious.<|eor|><|sor|>Still using a subconscious, eh? Call me when you can use the spin of an electron<|eor|><|sor|>Still using electrons, eh? Call me when you can ship your code on a single quark
*Edit: typo*<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 402 |
programmerhumor | Henrijs85 | gqwppez | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|soopr|>Absolutely, I made this because I needed to do stuff in Jupyter notebooks, because VS code was acting up with it. I'm a C# guy so I python isn't my strong suite, intellisense helps when you know how to code but the language is unfamiliar, a lot.<|eoopr|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 399 |
programmerhumor | Sexy_Koala_Juice | gqxb09n | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Jokes on you clowns, I code in binary. Why take advantage of decades of abstraction and automation when you can reinvent the wheel?
Even this comment was posted through an API call in curl.<|eor|><|sor|>Jokes on you clown, I use bits of wire, loops, a magnet and a steady hand to manually magnetise core memory<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 381 |
programmerhumor | aeropl3b | gqwcuxm | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I used to scoff at people who thought they were super smart and coded in a text editor, they pissed me off...those elitist bastards....and now my dev environment is vim...and now every time I look in the mirror...you elitist bastard...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 298 |
programmerhumor | Emergency_Paperclip | gqx05t9 | <|sols|><|sot|>I am nothing.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/dgxuytay20n61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>You can't code in notepad, notepad doesn't have dark mode.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 297 |
programmerhumor | Sheep_tester | 904mko | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 29,940 |
programmerhumor | _stream_line_ | e2nqr7k | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>Oh, you dont need to drag and drop these the symbols yourself? EASY MODE.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 4,720 |
programmerhumor | Thekrisys | e2nq18c | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>What was the password again? I could only see *******<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,286 |
programmerhumor | Sheep_tester | e2ns8bl | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>Oh, you dont need to drag and drop these the symbols yourself? EASY MODE.<|eor|><|soopr|>Shh don't give me ideas<|eoopr|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,983 |
programmerhumor | Daddu_tum | e2nsm48 | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>You had me on 'turhe2n is a weak password'. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,702 |
programmerhumor | MediocreThing | e2nqett | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>What was the password again? I could only see *******<|eor|><|sor|>You can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,130 |
programmerhumor | inertialODz | e2np3j8 | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>This could be implemented very well. You put your password in and then the dots act like a pattern. I'm being serious.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,092 |
programmerhumor | captsalad | e2o3b1n | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>You had me on 'turhe2n is a weak password'. <|eor|><|sor|>Oh shit, I didnt get that it was hunter2 until just now!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 813 |
programmerhumor | TheWildHorse | e2nrlxv | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>This is actually a decent captcha.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 629 |
programmerhumor | 4RIBMA | e2np64w | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>This could be implemented very well. You put your password in and then the dots act like a pattern. I'm being serious.<|eor|><|sor|>whoa, like a checksum with the mouse, it could be good<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 523 |
programmerhumor | Tia_and_Lulu | e2nvgjr | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>Oh, you dont need to drag and drop these the symbols yourself? EASY MODE.<|eor|><|soopr|>Shh don't give me ideas<|eoopr|><|sor|>I'm disappointed you don't have to drag and drop the pixels.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 415 |
programmerhumor | Syrenx2 | e2nrbk9 | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>*Enter password*
**Login failed**
*Enters password again*
**Login failed**
*Forgot password*
**Gets mail link**
**About to click submit on new password**
OH CRAP I HAD IT SET AS ENG KEYBOARD.
shifted it back to US and got the password right. <|eor|><|sor|>Or when you 'forget' your password and want to change it and the site says: new password can't be the same as the old. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 354 |
programmerhumor | SnehaManohar | e2np9xn | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>*Enter password*
**Login failed**
*Enters password again*
**Login failed**
*Forgot password*
**Gets mail link**
**About to click submit on new password**
OH CRAP I HAD IT SET AS ENG KEYBOARD.
shifted it back to US and got the password right. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 347 |
programmerhumor | 6ArtemisFowl9 | e2nt0ax | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>Oh, you dont need to drag and drop these the symbols yourself? EASY MODE.<|eor|><|sor|>You mean the collision box is larger than the actual dot??? WALK IN THE PARK <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 281 |
programmerhumor | NebulAe- | e2nz25x | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>Oh, you dont need to drag and drop these the symbols yourself? EASY MODE.<|eor|><|soopr|>Shh don't give me ideas<|eoopr|><|sor|>I'm disappointed you don't have to drag and drop the pixels.<|eor|><|sor|>Click on the images that look like your password. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 271 |
programmerhumor | thedenigratesystem | e2nsv6t | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>This is actually a decent captcha.<|eor|><|sor|>But how will it train bots?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 244 |
programmerhumor | Sheep_tester | e2nnkf0 | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|soopr|>Play here: https://sheeptester.github.io/javascripts/good-password.html
Source [here](https://github.com/SheepTester/sheeptester.github.io/blob/master/javascripts/good-password.html)<|eoopr|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 220 |
programmerhumor | dipique | e2nwk78 | <|sols|><|sot|>Password input with extra security<|eot|><|sol|>https://gfycat.com/PointedOptimalFrog<|eol|><|sor|>You had me on 'turhe2n is a weak password'. <|eor|><|sor|>How can a bunch of asterisks be a weak password? And why do they look like they're out of order?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 170 |
programmerhumor | Shery1508 | m8f1s7 | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 29,904 |
programmerhumor | matt_cum | grgyae3 | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>It was the first rule when I started programming 35 years ago and still the same today.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 332 |
programmerhumor | hampshirebrony | grh7eyt | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>Title: 1st rule of programming: If it works don't touch it.
Content: A video of a cow with no legs walking using its udders
Background music: A deliberately terrible rendition of My Heart Will Go On<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 246 |
programmerhumor | Padaca | grhnfvu | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>You're kidding... but just try spamming VirtualProtect calls in any Windows NT. You will eventually get a BSOD.<|eor|><|sor|>BSOD is Blue Screen Of Death, right?<|eor|><|sor|>It is shorthand for the philosophy "Be Sod". Much like sod, the effective programmer must know how to grow despite being walked on.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 222 |
programmerhumor | xan1242 | grh7n27 | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>You're kidding... but just try spamming VirtualProtect calls in any Windows NT. You will eventually get a BSOD.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 190 |
programmerhumor | opssum | grha2ob | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>People who say this already lost control over the project ;)<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 154 |
programmerhumor | Power-Max | grhlykq | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Just wrap the whole application in a container and write a script to relaunch it if the process crashes <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 104 |
programmerhumor | Crowdcontrolz | grhak4o | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>It was the first rule when I started programming 35 years ago and still the same today.<|eor|><|sor|>Good to see its working then<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 102 |
programmerhumor | RedstoneSpider | grhhhr8 | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>You're kidding... but just try spamming VirtualProtect calls in any Windows NT. You will eventually get a BSOD.<|eor|><|sor|>BSOD is Blue Screen Of Death, right?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 78 |
programmerhumor | Apache_Sobaco | grgwbwq | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>This is the first law of programming defeatism.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 74 |
programmerhumor | avatarRoku90 | grhcudy | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>People who say this already lost control over the project ;)<|eor|><|sor|>Some elements of the code base I work in are older than I am. Working with financial systems this is always rule number 1. The cost of a mistake or even downtime is way too high.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 71 |
programmerhumor | captainhamption | grhkphi | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>Title: 1st rule of programming: If it works don't touch it.
Content: A video of a cow with no legs walking using its udders
Background music: A deliberately terrible rendition of My Heart Will Go On<|eor|><|sor|>Good human.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 62 |
programmerhumor | joequin | grhg6nb | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>It was the first rule when I started programming 35 years ago and still the same today.<|eor|><|sor|>It is worth refactoring working code if it makes planned updates to it or surrounding code significantly easier though.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 59 |
programmerhumor | ArtemTree | grgxdpj | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>cow<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 55 |
programmerhumor | -Azrael-Blick- | grh7qrx | <|sols|><|sot|>Don't ...ever<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/50mbzw0iyyn61<|eol|><|sor|>If it works but poorly, optimize it!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 55 |
programmerhumor | mhhelsinki | og0qk1 | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 29,900 |
programmerhumor | KeksamPC | h4gg4ei | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>http://howtocenterincss.com/<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 803 |
programmerhumor | dashid | h4g3ye1 | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Front end is slow, but I can find it quite rewarding.
And to be fair, easier these days given the tools are closer browser consistency.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 746 |
programmerhumor | ncpa_cpl | h4g7nkb | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>One word - flexbox<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 600 |
programmerhumor | thirteenthirtyseven | h4gjq7v | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>And that's why I didn't do front-end coding.<|eor|><|sor|>started to learn full stack but after a while with css ,i stuck to backend<|eor|><|sor|>Full stuck developer<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 578 |
programmerhumor | skid3805 | h4g9qwk | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>And that's why I didn't do front-end coding.<|eor|><|sor|>started to learn full stack but after a while with css ,i stuck to backend<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 458 |
programmerhumor | lulzmachine | h4gkl1x | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>One word - flexbox<|eor|><|sor|>Me: Yeah flex box is so easy, it just makes sense!
Also me: Yeah its easy! Just do align-items-center! No justify-items-center? No place-items-center? Align-self center? Align content center? Wtf this worked last time! Item spacing stretch? Gah just put two siblings with flex: 1!
text-align: center?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 446 |
programmerhumor | rhaftygaming | h4gmb7n | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>One word - flexbox<|eor|><|sor|>Me: Yeah flex box is so easy, it just makes sense!
Also me: Yeah its easy! Just do align-items-center! No justify-items-center? No place-items-center? Align-self center? Align content center? Wtf this worked last time! Item spacing stretch? Gah just put two siblings with flex: 1!
text-align: center?<|eor|><|sor|>And then 30 minutes later you discover you forgot to add "display:flex;"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 327 |
programmerhumor | general656 | h4gcocz | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Front end is slow, but I can find it quite rewarding.
And to be fair, easier these days given the tools are closer browser consistency.<|eor|><|sor|>I work Fullstack but I make a living as a backend dev. Frontend is rewarding until you realize your app doesn't work in 5 different versions that use different or older CSS, in 3 other browsers you didn't test, in 10 different resolutions you didn't check and maybe on a very specific iPad gene that uses a very specific old Safari engine not to mention that there Chrome also uses the Safari engine because Apple ... so you can't even tell them to use different browser.
Backend is reasonable. You don't have to deal with so many outside dependencies, versions, devices etc. and it's just problem solving logic.
Frontend has so many dependencies, either it is browsers, devices or backend itself, that I really don't wanna deal with anymore in professional environment.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 318 |
programmerhumor | Vano_Kayaba | h4gbmpc | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Front end is slow, but I can find it quite rewarding.
And to be fair, easier these days given the tools are closer browser consistency.<|eor|><|sor|>Yeah, soon IE will be officially ditched. So safari will be the only special one<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 204 |
programmerhumor | Ohlander1 | h4gbcc4 | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I feel like a big part of this sub needs to do freeCodeCamp's web design course or something cause holy shit it's seriously not that hard guys<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 195 |
programmerhumor | sambobsambob | h4gcu4c | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I hate front end development, I am very much a backend kinda guy.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 163 |
programmerhumor | ColorfulPersimmon | h4gcjr7 | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>One word - flexbox<|eor|><|sor|>Another word - grid<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 163 |
programmerhumor | TheRolf | h4ggb3f | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>http://howtocenterincss.com/<|eor|><|sor|>Good human, I wanted to send it too.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 161 |
programmerhumor | TheCuntHunter6969 | h4gc8hl | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I feel like a big part of this sub needs to do freeCodeCamp's web design course or something cause holy shit it's seriously not that hard guys<|eor|><|sor|>It's not difficult, just tedious.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 143 |
programmerhumor | Daslicey | h4g8xoo | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[You're welcome](https://css-tricks.com/snippets/css/a-guide-to-flexbox/)<|eor|><|sor|>Weird flex but okay<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 134 |
programmerhumor | _GreenLegend | h4gdo43 | <|sols|><|sot|>Every damn time<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/cxvreisjcx971.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I hate front end development, I am very much a backend kinda guy.<|eor|><|sor|>Ahh! Got it working. Opens another Browser. damn...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 125 |
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