subreddit stringclasses 7 values | author stringlengths 3 20 | id stringlengths 5 7 | content stringlengths 67 30.4k | score int64 0 140k |
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programmerhumor | SamSlate | e9tpw5o | <|sols|><|sot|>"What was the previous electrician thinking?"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/Qj6ttXA.png<|eol|><|sor|>I think this is just a human thing. Which really is good, because it means we're progressing. can you imagine going to work on \*insert your craft here\* and thinking well theres no work to be done here, that guy 20 years ago did this perfectly.<|eor|><|sor|>well, civil engineers, hopefully...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 225 |
programmerhumor | NotTheOneYouNeed | e9tv291 | <|sols|><|sot|>"What was the previous electrician thinking?"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/Qj6ttXA.png<|eol|><|sor|>When my home inspector opened the breaker box, he spent 5 minutes raving about the obvious professionalism and care of the last electrician. I almost asked if he needed a moment alone with the wiring. <|eor|><|sor|>Makes me think of r/cablePorn<|eor|><|sor|>This meant something completely different when the internet wasn't a thing <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 223 |
programmerhumor | TheOboeMan | e9to2pj | <|sols|><|sot|>"What was the previous electrician thinking?"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/Qj6ttXA.png<|eol|><|sor|>>This guy writes code like from the 70s!
>
>But C++ wasn't a thing back then.
>
>Exactly!<|eor|><|sor|>Have you seen the type of code that electrical engineers write? <|eor|><|sor|>I used to help my electrical engineer friends write code in college. It was both fun and not fun in different ways.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 195 |
programmerhumor | nivek_c | e9tqbuh | <|sols|><|sot|>"What was the previous electrician thinking?"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/Qj6ttXA.png<|eol|><|sor|>When my home inspector opened the breaker box, he spent 5 minutes raving about the obvious professionalism and care of the last electrician. I almost asked if he needed a moment alone with the wiring. <|eor|><|sor|>with the amount of horse shit ive seen doing residential side jobs, that doesnt surprise me in the slightest. thing with residential electricians is a lot of them are more or less laborers who know how to splice wire, with one qualified journeyman running the show. these guys usually get paid per job, not per hour, so the faster they can slap some shit into the wall the faster they can move onto the next job and earn more money....<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 193 |
programmerhumor | Loner_Cat | 10oe9uw | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 56,074 |
programmerhumor | TheMemer____ | j6e8dql | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Golang: Unused variable
Rust: variable does not live long enough<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 3,201 |
programmerhumor | kosky95 | j6exlh6 | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Golang: Unused variable
Rust: variable does not live long enough<|eor|><|sor|>unused variable causes an error?? why though, like whats the point of that<|eor|><|sor|>You must use all of you variables is like momma saying that you must eat all of your broccoli<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,829 |
programmerhumor | Paul_Robert_ | j6ea4jo | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>If the track is a half loop, then the crab will make it to the otherside via a shortcut, seems legit.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,708 |
programmerhumor | jddddddddddd | j6e5d5r | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Is the fact that C is being represented by a crab infuriating anyone else, or is it just me?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,681 |
programmerhumor | Snykeurs | j6e7l5l | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>If you have an IndentationError in python, I suggest to stop using word as text editor<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,229 |
programmerhumor | cakelena | j6exa6j | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Golang: Unused variable
Rust: variable does not live long enough<|eor|><|sor|>unused variable causes an error?? why though, like whats the point of that<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 982 |
programmerhumor | 0xd34db347 | j6e7ixc | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Is the fact that C is being represented by a crab infuriating anyone else, or is it just me?<|eor|><|sor|>Yes, I actually came in here to say the rust one is wrong and should be a compiler error before double checking and noticing it wasn't rust.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 703 |
programmerhumor | tommasz | j6fqrds | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Golang: Unused variable
Rust: variable does not live long enough<|eor|><|sor|>unused variable causes an error?? why though, like whats the point of that<|eor|><|sor|>You must use all of you variables is like momma saying that you must eat all of your broccoli<|eor|><|sor|>Integers are starving in Africa!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 631 |
programmerhumor | Parkhausdruckkonsole | j6ee7yd | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>If the track is a half loop, then the crab will make it to the otherside via a shortcut, seems legit.<|eor|><|sor|>If it's a full loop the shrimp goes back and starts going forward again to pretend it did a full loop<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 565 |
programmerhumor | stixx_06 | j6ety48 | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>TypeScript: `Type [number, number] cannot be assigned to number[]`<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 508 |
programmerhumor | mini_market | j6ehcls | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>So the C, Python and Java programs crashed meaning JavaScript eventually wins once it finishes installing packages?<|eor|><|sor|>It never finishes installing<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 341 |
programmerhumor | Loner_Cat | j6e7y81 | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>If you have an IndentationError in python, I suggest to stop using word as text editor<|eor|><|soopr|>This man pythons<|eoopr|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 301 |
programmerhumor | amineris | j6e7qrh | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>That crab is hilarious. Should be Rust tho.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 296 |
programmerhumor | btvoidx | j6f0jkn | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Golang: Unused variable
Rust: variable does not live long enough<|eor|><|sor|>unused variable causes an error?? why though, like whats the point of that<|eor|><|sor|> Something along the lines of ensuring code quality probably.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 283 |
programmerhumor | Archolex | j6f0sn6 | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Golang: Unused variable
Rust: variable does not live long enough<|eor|><|sor|>unused variable causes an error?? why though, like whats the point of that<|eor|><|sor|> Something along the lines of ensuring code quality probably.<|eor|><|sor|>Should be a warning if that's the only reason<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 275 |
programmerhumor | Zagre | j6f589o | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Golang: Unused variable
Rust: variable does not live long enough<|eor|><|sor|>unused variable causes an error?? why though, like whats the point of that<|eor|><|sor|> Something along the lines of ensuring code quality probably.<|eor|><|sor|>Should be a warning if that's the only reason<|eor|><|sor|>It probably should, but gauging by the number of this subreddit's users who admit to just ignoring warnings, maybe I agree with stricter restrictions on shit coders.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 235 |
programmerhumor | vanriggs | j6eds5q | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>So the C, Python and Java programs crashed meaning JavaScript eventually wins once it finishes installing packages?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 212 |
programmerhumor | derefr | j6f64ed | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Golang: Unused variable
Rust: variable does not live long enough<|eor|><|sor|>unused variable causes an error?? why though, like whats the point of that<|eor|><|sor|> Something along the lines of ensuring code quality probably.<|eor|><|sor|>Should be a warning if that's the only reason<|eor|><|sor|>Golang also treats unused imports as an error.
AFAICT the maintainers of Golang (mostly Google) have decided that any code that shouldn't make it into a commit, should be rejected at compile-time. The compiler is essentially acting as a linter, for any lints that are "free" to notice at compile-time without additional analysis cost.
Their goal here, I think, is *canonicalization* there shouldn't be two ways to encode the same semantics in a commit. As such, I expect that they'd also love to make the compiler error on any code that wasn't `go fmt`ed and the only reason they don't, is that it costs more to run `go fmt` over an entire codebase than to just run the compiler over said codebase.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 211 |
programmerhumor | oneandonlysealoftime | j6f35yu | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Golang: Unused variable
Rust: variable does not live long enough<|eor|><|sor|>Wtf variable does not live long enough? What's the purpise?<|eor|><|sor|>That's Rust 's way of automatically managing memory - you literally write code that must prove that no memory management issues occur, thus achieving safety on par with languages with GCs, but without the runtime overhead<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 201 |
programmerhumor | bobbane | j6ej0l4 | <|sols|><|sot|>Let's test which language is faster!<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ykd268k6x0fa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>C - how fast do you want the wrong answer?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 185 |
programmerhumor | The_Real_Slim_Lemon | s60to6 | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 55,844 |
programmerhumor | Return_Of_The_Fly | ht0xs7q | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Never underestimate the psychological effect on seeing a progress bar that moves. I did a similar thing once: Adding a progress bar to an action that took quite a while to finish. I did nothing else. Users said the app works much faster now.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 12,349 |
programmerhumor | Cartasiand | ht0zi48 | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Progress bars are not really there to show you the remaining time, but to reassure the user : "yes something is happening, do not close the window"<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 9,942 |
programmerhumor | PM_ME_UR_LIPZ | ht19wc6 | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Progress bars are not really there to show you the remaining time, but to reassure the user : "yes something is happening, do not close the window"<|eor|><|sor|>it's because, historically, computer experience has been shit with freezes and crashes.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 3,804 |
programmerhumor | Illeazar | ht1ab5n | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Progress bars are not really there to show you the remaining time, but to reassure the user : "yes something is happening, do not close the window"<|eor|><|sor|>it's because, historically, computer experience has been shit with freezes and crashes.<|eor|><|sor|>This is the real answer here. The customer's response is completely valid, given that most people have had many experiences with computers freezing and crashing.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 2,599 |
programmerhumor | metropolis_noir | ht14wyn | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Never underestimate the psychological effect on seeing a progress bar that moves. I did a similar thing once: Adding a progress bar to an action that took quite a while to finish. I did nothing else. Users said the app works much faster now.<|eor|><|sor|>And if the progress bar speeds up as it moves towards 100%, the psychological effect is even greater<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 2,296 |
programmerhumor | boon4376 | ht16mdw | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Never underestimate the psychological effect on seeing a progress bar that moves. I did a similar thing once: Adding a progress bar to an action that took quite a while to finish. I did nothing else. Users said the app works much faster now.<|eor|><|sor|>And if the progress bar speeds up as it moves towards 100%, the psychological effect is even greater<|eor|><|sor|>We just have a spinner and a message that says this will complete in about 3 minutes. It averages about 1 minute so everyone is impressed by how fast it is.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 2,236 |
programmerhumor | AceKiron | ht10tuc | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Isn't that the whole point of a progress bar? To show the app isn't frozen?<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 1,944 |
programmerhumor | Din5566 | ht0zyl3 | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Never underestimate the psychological effect on seeing a progress bar that moves. I did a similar thing once: Adding a progress bar to an action that took quite a while to finish. I did nothing else. Users said the app works much faster now.<|eor|><|sor|>I'm actually proud that I've recently learned to "just f***ing wait for it" when I get no feedback from something loading<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 1,754 |
programmerhumor | antilos_weorsick | ht126b2 | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>I mean, the app was freezing. Notifying users that something is going on behind the screen, and it's not their device having a stroke is design 101.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 1,559 |
programmerhumor | justrhysism | ht0zqys | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>I remember reading an article many years ago about a travel deal sites that originally would give results to the users practically instantlybut it was the early days of these types of websites and it seemed too fast and the users didnt believe that it was *actually worked*, so they implemented a faux loading screen and slowed it down by like 5-10 seconds and their click conversions went *up*!
Sometimes humans need useless things to make them feel comfortable.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 1,445 |
programmerhumor | Specialist_Ad_1763 | ht0yxdk | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>I mean, that is just good graphical design. The progress bar enhances the user experience. Functionally, the app doesnt do anything with this feature but the user is getting real-time information that the app is working. So yea, sheeple are predictable, and these common practices are used for a reason!<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 1,423 |
programmerhumor | Dnomyar96 | ht1cukw | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Progress bars are not really there to show you the remaining time, but to reassure the user : "yes something is happening, do not close the window"<|eor|><|sor|>it's because, historically, computer experience has been shit with freezes and crashes.<|eor|><|sor|>This is the real answer here. The customer's response is completely valid, given that most people have had many experiences with computers freezing and crashing.<|eor|><|sor|>Yeah, if a program just freezes without any indication that it's doing something, I just assume it broke (after a certain amount of time at least). It doesn't need to be a progress bar, but at least a message that it might take a bit or a spinner to indicate something is happening.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 1,239 |
programmerhumor | bleistift2 | ht1dffm | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Progress bars are not really there to show you the remaining time, but to reassure the user : "yes something is happening, do not close the window"<|eor|><|sor|>it's because, historically, computer experience has been shit with freezes and crashes.<|eor|><|sor|>This is the real answer here. The customer's response is completely valid, given that most people have had many experiences with computers freezing and crashing.<|eor|><|sor|>Yeah, if a program just freezes without any indication that it's doing something, I just assume it broke (after a certain amount of time at least). It doesn't need to be a progress bar, but at least a message that it might take a bit or a spinner to indicate something is happening.<|eor|><|sor|>Unfortunately you cant trust spinners, either. There bastards are just happy spinning away while the whole world falls to pieces.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 984 |
programmerhumor | rufreakde1 | ht17um0 | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Never underestimate the psychological effect on seeing a progress bar that moves. I did a similar thing once: Adding a progress bar to an action that took quite a while to finish. I did nothing else. Users said the app works much faster now.<|eor|><|sor|>And if the progress bar speeds up as it moves towards 100%, the psychological effect is even greater<|eor|><|sor|>We just have a spinner and a message that says this will complete in about 3 minutes. It averages about 1 minute so everyone is impressed by how fast it is.<|eor|><|sor|>Set the bars low I like it win win<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 978 |
programmerhumor | zayoe4 | ht13qvx | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Never underestimate the psychological effect on seeing a progress bar that moves. I did a similar thing once: Adding a progress bar to an action that took quite a while to finish. I did nothing else. Users said the app works much faster now.<|eor|><|sor|>I'm actually proud that I've recently learned to "just f***ing wait for it" when I get no feedback from something loading<|eor|><|sor|>If I don't get a response quick enough, I back out and try again. If I don't get a response the second time, I turn adblock off. The third time? I run it in incognito mode. If that doesn't work... well I tried.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 880 |
programmerhumor | simple_test | ht13mid | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Isn't that the whole point of a progress bar? To show the app isn't frozen?<|eor|><|sor|>Not as stupid as its being made out to be honestly. Plus design wise he could have had a non % progess like a spinner instead.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 819 |
programmerhumor | Nebuchadnezzer2 | ht1f9mb | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Never underestimate the psychological effect on seeing a progress bar that moves. I did a similar thing once: Adding a progress bar to an action that took quite a while to finish. I did nothing else. Users said the app works much faster now.<|eor|><|sor|>And if the progress bar speeds up as it moves towards 100%, the psychological effect is even greater<|eor|><|sor|>We just have a spinner and a message that says this will complete in about 3 minutes. It averages about 1 minute so everyone is impressed by how fast it is.<|eor|><|sor|>Set the bars low I like it win win<|eor|><|sor|>Undersell, overdeliver.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 596 |
programmerhumor | jannfiete | ht10jf2 | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>ask yourself, would you prefer an app with progress bar (be it fake or not) or an app freezing for 30+ secs? your answer definitely is the former, and your client, at least in this regard, did nothing wrong.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 593 |
programmerhumor | grumblyoldman | ht18ee4 | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>Never underestimate the psychological effect on seeing a progress bar that moves. I did a similar thing once: Adding a progress bar to an action that took quite a while to finish. I did nothing else. Users said the app works much faster now.<|eor|><|sor|>I'm actually proud that I've recently learned to "just f***ing wait for it" when I get no feedback from something loading<|eor|><|sor|>If I don't get a response quick enough, I back out and try again. If I don't get a response the second time, I turn adblock off. The third time? I run it in incognito mode. If that doesn't work... well I tried.<|eor|><|sor|>My preferred method is to wait about 20 seconds and then switch to a new tab and read Reddit until it's done. At least half the time I forget about the thing I was waiting on and don't check back for like half an hour, but at least it's generally done by then.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 515 |
programmerhumor | 0ba78683-dbdd-4a31-a | ht12u2k | <|soss|><|sot|>I made a fake progress bar to shut up clients complaining about my app "freezing" whenever it had to make a call to their slow API<|eot|><|sost|> We had a client that complained about our app freezing. We were calling their slow API, and the app was clearly just waiting for results, which sometimes would take half a minute. Even after explaining all that, we still kept getting complaints about freezing.
I added a progress bar that started at 5% went +10% every second till 65%, then +10% every 4 seconds till 95%, and then finally it just waits if we still haven't gotten results (each delay has a cancellation token, so it zooms to the end once a result is found). Complaints disappeared, clients were happy, product manager was happy.
It makes me laugh, thought it might makes someone else laugh too. Feel free to copy my dodgy algorithm if you find yourself in the same boat as me, I honestly forget the thing is fake whenever I see it.<|eost|><|sor|>I mean, that is just good graphical design. The progress bar enhances the user experience. Functionally, the app doesnt do anything with this feature but the user is getting real-time information that the app is working. So yea, sheeple are predictable, and these common practices are used for a reason!<|eor|><|sor|>The joke should be that the progress bar is fake, not that users thought the app had frozen. If the user does something and expects feedback but gets none that's just bad UX.<|eor|><|eoss|><|endoftext|> | 479 |
programmerhumor | AggressiveIyAvg | mva71a | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 55,789 |
programmerhumor | Booterken | gvay18n | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Three monitors, and i feel insulted<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,240 |
programmerhumor | TheOneHyer | gvaywal | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Three monitors, and i feel insulted<|eor|><|sor|>One for IDE, one for a million Firefox tabs, one for email, Teams, and even more tabs. Single monitors genuinely make me feel constricted at this point. The video editing software I occasionally use can also use three monitors. I need an intervention...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,490 |
programmerhumor | RiotPixel1 | gvawefy | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>He has not closed the quotes and that's bugging me...!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,112 |
programmerhumor | LazyAssMonkey | gvazrtk | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Wait, is that jin-yang ? Does he have a stand up special ?<|eor|><|sor|>No thats Eric Bachmann<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 928 |
programmerhumor | Xanahol | gvavkl1 | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>How tf did you manage to get 2 mematic watermarks?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 747 |
programmerhumor | AnyoneButWe | gvauk3b | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Oh you're a gamer*
Most software engineers I know just have some kind of cheap laptop \\\()_/<|eor|><|sor|>Data science and ML guys have the good stuff.
Programmer know how to push stuff to the build/CI server.
And be very careful around the guy in very casual clothes, unkept look and an old, rough ThinkPad.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 641 |
programmerhumor | throwaway_1aeiou | gvatax2 | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Wait, is that jin-yang ? Does he have a stand up special ?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 638 |
programmerhumor | iamasuitama | gvb3qo2 | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>He has not closed the quotes and that's bugging me...!<|eor|><|sor|>Word is the string is still ongoing, to this day. The way I read it, we are part of it. We're in it now, I don't know if we'll ever get out.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 567 |
programmerhumor | ooepi | gvax40j | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>How tf did you manage to get 2 mematic watermarks?<|eor|><|sor|>There's actually 3 if you look closely.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 566 |
programmerhumor | StuckOnALoop | gvb1e0k | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Wait, is that jin-yang ? Does he have a stand up special ?<|eor|><|sor|>No thats Eric Bachmann<|eor|><|sor|>Isn't he dead?<|eor|><|sor|>Also fat... and a poor<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 486 |
programmerhumor | Codemonkey1987 | gvb0osi | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Oh you're a gamer*
Most software engineers I know just have some kind of cheap laptop \\\()_/<|eor|><|sor|>Data science and ML guys have the good stuff.
Programmer know how to push stuff to the build/CI server.
And be very careful around the guy in very casual clothes, unkept look and an old, rough ThinkPad.<|eor|><|sor|>I remember interviewing at a major tech company. Most of my fellow interviewees were there in suits and formal as was the culture of the company. There was one scruffy dude with long hair, long beard, wearing a black hoodie and cargo trousers. Somehow I feel he had the better skills and possibly got the job, purely off stereotype<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 372 |
programmerhumor | marxama | gvb5bht | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>He has not closed the quotes and that's bugging me...!<|eor|><|sor|>Word is the string is still ongoing, to this day. The way I read it, we are part of it. We're in it now, I don't know if we'll ever get out.<|eor|><|sor|>"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 321 |
programmerhumor | Codemonkey1987 | gvb0sdt | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Wait, is that jin-yang ? Does he have a stand up special ?<|eor|><|sor|>No thats Eric Bachmann<|eor|><|sor|>Isn't he dead?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 300 |
programmerhumor | RafatRifaie | gvazmsp | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>How tf did you manage to get 2 mematic watermarks?<|eor|><|sor|>There's actually 3 if you look closely.<|eor|><|sor|>There's actually **4** if you **look closer**.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 231 |
programmerhumor | djinn6 | gvawo57 | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Oh you're a gamer*
Most software engineers I know just have some kind of cheap laptop \\\()_/<|eor|><|sor|>Most of them would have a company-issued laptop, which is probably not all that cheap.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 227 |
programmerhumor | Milkshakes00 | gvbbd3t | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel attacked<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/gph4zwsp6hu61.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Three monitors, and i feel insulted<|eor|><|sor|>One for IDE, one for a million Firefox tabs, one for email, Teams, and even more tabs. Single monitors genuinely make me feel constricted at this point. The video editing software I occasionally use can also use three monitors. I need an intervention...<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>This is closer to me, but still just three.
Left for IDE or game, middle for browser, right for Plex/Netflix<|eor|><|sor|>Oh man, you game/code with your neck turned? Fuck me, that hurts just thinking about.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 184 |
programmerhumor | Uni_Omni | gcl1lc | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 55,743 |
programmerhumor | Schnitzel725 | fpc6uue | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>You forgot the arrow that says "Question marked as duplicate"
Edit: seems I've triggered flashbacks for a lot of people..<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,874 |
programmerhumor | amazeguy | fpbzdnm | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>the hero that everyone on stackoverflow needs but stackoverflow doesnt deserve<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,065 |
programmerhumor | electropoptart | fpc80l6 | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>You forgot the arrow that says "Question marked as duplicate"
Edit: seems I've triggered flashbacks for a lot of people..<|eor|><|sor|>And I googled your question and the answer was the first result
They forget that their knowledge enables them to sift through SERPs easily to find the suitable solution while were floundering in a sea of wtf mildly panicking<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,290 |
programmerhumor | GabuEx | fpc7kq5 | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"How do I do this on Windows?"
"Use Linux"
Thanks bro.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,179 |
programmerhumor | nodnarbiter | fpc5oio | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>the hero that everyone on stackoverflow needs but stackoverflow doesnt deserve<|eor|><|sor|>I hate stackoverflow. It helps you, tremendously, but a lot abuse the downvote button (much like on Reddit) for the "karma" points, and so it became a hostile environment for anyone who's about to ask something.<|eor|><|sor|>There's alot of self-importance on that site. People who think their time is too valuable to waste on answering a question even though they're there at their own volition to HELP people they use it as a platform to abuse people and act superior. Like, if you're going to be a dick all the time then just don't answer questions. StackOverflow isn't paying you to be there.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,160 |
programmerhumor | loox37 | fpc4mvf | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>the hero that everyone on stackoverflow needs but stackoverflow doesnt deserve<|eor|><|sor|>I hate stackoverflow. It helps you, tremendously, but a lot abuse the downvote button (much like on Reddit) for the "karma" points, and so it became a hostile environment for anyone who's about to ask something.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,002 |
programmerhumor | Unlock17A | fpc7jlk | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>the hero that everyone on stackoverflow needs but stackoverflow doesnt deserve<|eor|><|sor|>I hate stackoverflow. It helps you, tremendously, but a lot abuse the downvote button (much like on Reddit) for the "karma" points, and so it became a hostile environment for anyone who's about to ask something.<|eor|><|sor|>There's alot of self-importance on that site. People who think their time is too valuable to waste on answering a question even though they're there at their own volition to HELP people they use it as a platform to abuse people and act superior. Like, if you're going to be a dick all the time then just don't answer questions. StackOverflow isn't paying you to be there.<|eor|><|sor|>Exactly what I criticise about it. One user even commented 'Not worth my time' on one of my questions lol.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 542 |
programmerhumor | ricocotam | fpc6x60 | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Makes me think about the guy who closed my question as duplicate and linked it to another question. Question were not similar nor were the answers. Another helped me and I understood why it was linked : in the two questions answer they used a link to regex tutorial completely useless for my case !<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 395 |
programmerhumor | EMCoupling | fpc7pni | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>the hero that everyone on stackoverflow needs but stackoverflow doesnt deserve<|eor|><|sor|>I hate stackoverflow. It helps you, tremendously, but a lot abuse the downvote button (much like on Reddit) for the "karma" points, and so it became a hostile environment for anyone who's about to ask something.<|eor|><|sor|>There's alot of self-importance on that site. People who think their time is too valuable to waste on answering a question even though they're there at their own volition to HELP people they use it as a platform to abuse people and act superior. Like, if you're going to be a dick all the time then just don't answer questions. StackOverflow isn't paying you to be there.<|eor|><|sor|>Exactly what I criticise about it. One user even commented 'Not worth my time' on one of my questions lol.<|eor|><|sor|>Lol, worth his time to comment but not worth his time to give an answer. So funny.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 395 |
programmerhumor | Ellweiss | fpc7n7g | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What irks me the most is people answering "That's wrong, in 99% of cases you don't want to do that. Do that instead.".
Dammit, either the person asking is already a master and is the 1%, or they are a beginner and you could answer their question and tell them WHY it's usually a bad idea before offering alternative solutions.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 312 |
programmerhumor | LeiziBesterd | fpc7x2k | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Makes me think about the guy who closed my question as duplicate and linked it to another question. Question were not similar nor were the answers. Another helped me and I understood why it was linked : in the two questions answer they used a link to regex tutorial completely useless for my case !<|eor|><|sor|>Bonus points if the duplicate is like 8 years old and the answer doesn't apply anymore.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 294 |
programmerhumor | diamond_head_01 | fpc86ib | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>-1 for not having 20+ years of experience.
StackOverflow is r/roastme but for programmers.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 261 |
programmerhumor | krystof1119 | fpcb0oh | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"How do I do this on Windows?"
"Use Linux"
Thanks bro.<|eor|><|sor|>Happened to me too.
"How do I do x in frontend JS?"
"No idea, but if you switched to PHP, it has a function there for that" (that function didn't even do what I needed it to)<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 246 |
programmerhumor | ykarus117 | fpc8s75 | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Once I was stuck in a little for-fun project, lucky for me it was an Arduino related problem and I posted it on the Arduino forum.
Their community was a blast! I received like 10 comments on my post and every single one was a helpful insight, one guy replied not only with a solution but even with a detailed idea he thought I could find interesting.
10/10 would post there again
4/10 Stack should really improve as a community<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 201 |
programmerhumor | lifeisforkiamsoup | fpc4h2e | <|sols|><|sot|>Thank you guys, you are the real heroes<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/5vvpn6tlghw41.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Work in Building Automation for the government. Make 6 figures.
There was a Philippino dude when I worked at the private sector that held my hand from 2008 to 2011, would not be where I am today without him doing shit like this.
He was just interested how shit worked and was fired up to talk about it, made his day to help me out.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 161 |
programmerhumor | eNJAy145 | 92uhu7 | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 55,726 |
programmerhumor | jfq722 | e38gsj1 | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Its probably taking up just enough space to avoid a memory issue somehow. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 8,999 |
programmerhumor | supyonamesjosh | e38iizv | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I found isLauren()
Which determined if the userId of the logged in user was Lauren, and if it was it did stuff.
Face Palm for days<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 4,424 |
programmerhumor | GoddamUrSoulEdHarley | e38km7u | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>One time I inherited some JavaScript in which all of the comments, function names were Spanish. I don't speak Spanish. I translated One of the comments above a function and it said 'this works by magic - Sergio'<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 4,177 |
programmerhumor | mattemer | e38k23p | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I'm updating code for a function that we were changing. Spent a couple days updating, started testing and it wasn't working.
After destroying my brain for another day trying to figure it out, I finally read the comments I MYSELF put in a year ago when I last updated this:
"Mattemer, the below code will need to be updated if xyz changes. You'll forget about this code a year from now, waste days trying to figure out why the updates aren't working, and you won't look at this, because it looks like nothing and also you're an idiot. If anyone else reads this, my apologies."
Edit: Now I know a secret of Reddit Gold: Embarrass yourself in front of the masses! Thanks for the gold and I'm glad everyone enjoyed this!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,671 |
programmerhumor | ctesibius | e38iyld | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|> ! midlertidig
That was the only comment in a 6000-line BASIC program that controlled a piece of scientific apparatus. There were 600 globals, 3 local variables, and everything had names like `A9$`.
No, don't tell me what it means. I want to preserve the mystery.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,306 |
programmerhumor | lpreams | e38j03c | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I found isLauren()
Which determined if the userId of the logged in user was Lauren, and if it was it did stuff.
Face Palm for days<|eor|><|sor|>I find this comment very intriguing. Did Lauren write that code? How was Lauren significant compared to other users? What stuff did it do? <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,880 |
programmerhumor | rglogowski | e38gcuo | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I hired a contract developer to make some changes to an old application. He wasn't making good progress so I terminated him and when we opened up his code we found he'd used ascii characters to make a comment "Brad the Almighty" (obviously his name was Brad).
Two things though. The comment was HUGE - like a couple hundred lines of text.
Also he misspelled "Almighty" so it actually said "Brad the Almightry". The word "Almightry" is a running joke to this day.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,620 |
programmerhumor | supyonamesjosh | e38md9a | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I found isLauren()
Which determined if the userId of the logged in user was Lauren, and if it was it did stuff.
Face Palm for days<|eor|><|sor|>I find this comment very intriguing. Did Lauren write that code? How was Lauren significant compared to other users? What stuff did it do? <|eor|><|sor|>Lauren was a manager who got access to special reports. So the links would only show up if she was the user logged in.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,404 |
programmerhumor | ohstopitu | e38lzbf | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>One time I inherited some JavaScript in which all of the comments, function names were Spanish. I don't speak Spanish. I translated One of the comments above a function and it said 'this works by magic - Sergio'<|eor|><|sor|>I've had Russian comments once - it was extremely well documented btw - but in Russian. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,398 |
programmerhumor | Cawifre | e38lg5m | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I'm updating code for a function that we were changing. Spent a couple days updating, started testing and it wasn't working.
After destroying my brain for another day trying to figure it out, I finally read the comments I MYSELF put in a year ago when I last updated this:
"Mattemer, the below code will need to be updated if xyz changes. You'll forget about this code a year from now, waste days trying to figure out why the updates aren't working, and you won't look at this, because it looks like nothing and also you're an idiot. If anyone else reads this, my apologies."
Edit: Now I know a secret of Reddit Gold: Embarrass yourself in front of the masses! Thanks for the gold and I'm glad everyone enjoyed this!<|eor|><|sor|>At least you met your own expectations.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,078 |
programmerhumor | jugalator | e38krs0 | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Its probably taking up just enough space to avoid a memory issue somehow. <|eor|><|sor|>Could also cause a delay necessary to synchronize threads. Either way, its a sign of bad code.<|eor|><|sor|>I was about to say that a linker ought to strip unused functions and a JIT ought to not really load them (?), but this looks like Python, so... :| Yes, maybe that's true.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,077 |
programmerhumor | nmcain05 | e38gkqk | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>A very nice alphabetized list of profane words in the view source of outback steakhouse.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 933 |
programmerhumor | ImAStupidFace | e38joon | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|> ! midlertidig
That was the only comment in a 6000-line BASIC program that controlled a piece of scientific apparatus. There were 600 globals, 3 local variables, and everything had names like `A9$`.
No, don't tell me what it means. I want to preserve the mystery.<|eor|><|sor|>> No, don't tell me what it means.
> 4 people proceed to tell him what it means
damn it reddit<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 922 |
programmerhumor | wtmh | e38n44g | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|> #Come back and increment this number after you attempt to optimize this resource-heavy function and fail: 8<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 791 |
programmerhumor | TaborlinTheGreat | e38i8fo | <|sols|><|sot|>Whats the best thing you've found in code? :<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/8a5ccw86uvc11.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I was looking through some Python code and couldn't figure out why the decorator for function "foo" wasn't working. When I went to the decorator code, I saw that the first line read, "if fn.__name__ != 'foo':" <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 752 |
programmerhumor | Glaiel-Gamer | uwaeym | <|sols|><|sot|>made the worst minesweeper<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3xwct597ja191.gif<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 55,275 |
programmerhumor | Geoclasm | i9qghug | <|sols|><|sot|>made the worst minesweeper<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3xwct597ja191.gif<|eol|><|sor|>So is this like Battle Ship where it just puts a mine where ever you click? Just randomly distributes 98 mines, then drops one mine when you click, where you click?
I'm cross-posting this to FYIP.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 5,413 |
programmerhumor | jjdmol | i9qhclc | <|sols|><|sot|>made the worst minesweeper<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3xwct597ja191.gif<|eol|><|sor|>So is this like Battle Ship where it just puts a mine where ever you click? Just randomly distributes 98 mines, then drops one mine when you click, where you click?
I'm cross-posting this to FYIP.<|eor|><|sor|>There's many ways to go about this, but yes that's the gist of it. As a bonus, it seems to move/not place mines wherever you put a flag. Just to further mess with you in case you just put in some wild guesses before clicking a square.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,608 |
programmerhumor | ONOMATOPOElA | i9qr5vn | <|sols|><|sot|>made the worst minesweeper<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3xwct597ja191.gif<|eol|><|soopr|>https://www.glaielgames.com/adversarialminesweeper/<|eoopr|><|sor|>Hey man great website but it does not work on the Nintendo 3DS browser.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,888 |
programmerhumor | Glaiel-Gamer | i9qak8g | <|sols|><|sot|>made the worst minesweeper<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/3xwct597ja191.gif<|eol|><|soopr|>https://www.glaielgames.com/adversarialminesweeper/<|eoopr|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,499 |
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