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Its one of those things I always heard but never really believed; even though it did make sense, realising endorphins and all. I started jogging every day and doing some light exercises in my flat to try and get back into shape.
The past year I have been going through a bad bout of OCD, it really flared up and wasn't settling down. This past month I've felt so good, it hasnt completely disappeared but its 100% more manageable than it has been.
Just wanted to share this for others benefit. | OCD |
I have PRN medication (betablockers) that I've been recently prescribed to stop both migraines & ptsd symptoms.
I'm getting better at taking them if I feel a migraine coming on, & it works. It also works to help with the ptsd *if I actually take them.*
If my fiance or someone sees me struggling & helps me to take them then it can really help.
The problem is if I'm in need of them & I'm on my own I don't seem to have my head together enough to remember I even have them, & so I don't take them when I actually need them.
Does anyone else struggle with this?
How can I start to catch the episodes before they get bad & actually use the tools I have? | ptsd |
A couple of years ago, I weighed 230 pounds. After a year of working my a** off I got it down to 170. Took meds boom back to 220. Stopped the meds and started working out again but could only get my self to 180ish.
Currently, I’m bed ridden due to a spine injury and feel like s*** because I’ve gained weight again along with my worsening OCD. A new doctor prescribed the following meds for my OCD, Anxiety and Depression:
Aripiprazole (2
mg)
Clonazepam
(0.25 mg) +
Propranolol
(20 mg)
Fluvoxamine (100mg)
Would taking these worsen the weight gain and make my mental health worse consequentially? | OCD |
hello. i’m 18f. my ocd started getting worse in 2021 winter and now i’m at the point where i don’t leave my room often and skip class because i’m scared i’m going to do something bad or have intrusive thoughts. my themes are mainly sexual.. pocd and harm ocd, although the pocd is kind of reduced now. also i have been irregularly taking my bipolar and antipsychotic medication and i’m not being medicated for my adhd either so maybe that’s making things worse
i left my house to take the train for the first time in a while yesterday and it was 1am. when i was going to grab my seat there was a man that took the seat i was going to take and i had to stand in between him and this guy who was smoking weed, had no mask and coughing and it irritated me just a bit. i started getting these thoughts about “what if i just snapped and assaulted him”. i felt like i wanted to see how far my brain would take me. and since i was standing i felt a speed bump and i had to lean on my foot to keep myself from falling down, but my brain was also using that as a way for me to “act out” my weird revenge fantasy / compulsion. while i was stabilizing myself i pretended in my imagination that i was actually lashing out and going batshit crazy, but in my head i started confusing reality and fantasy and was like wait i don’t want to actually harm anyone and i had a loud voice in my head say “you realize you were actually keeping yourself stable and doing the exact opposite of what your negative thoughts were picturing”. writing this out helped but i can’t tell if this was a compulsion / testing mechanism, genuine desire or a mix of both. | OCD |
So, my therapist has asked me to research EMDR for our next session and share my thoughts on going ahead with it. I'm not sure if it'll work, but I'm willing to try.
I've seen it says that it is a very powerful therapy and the client's safety comes first. Can anyone explain that in better detail? It's worried me a bit.
Also,would anyone mind sharing their experiences with EMDR? I know everyone's different, but I'd like to be a little more prepared. | ptsd |
I feel like I have been in a state of dread for years now. I wake up sad. I go to bed sadder. I go through my day with a gross numbness. But sometimes I will have those phases where things maybe feel okay, yknow? It makes me forget for a just a little bit about that feeling I always have. And I keep tricking myself over and over that it'll be okay and it will get better. But it never does. And the pain of that truth hurts worse everytime.
It gets worse and worse each time I am alone. I want it to go away so so so bad. I just want it to end. And I just dont really know what to do anymore.
I feel like I do the right things to help myself. I reach out to people when I feel my head is dangerous. But I am always still alone when I need someone most. And they all say the same things. That they care and that they are there for me. But they arent. No one is. Time and time again I am shown that. Tonight was particularly hard, and I really really didnt want to be alone. And one of my friends came to comfort me for a little. But he left, told me he would be back soon, and then came around about 4 hours later. Its just a constant cycle of being let down and left behind. The only person who can be there for me is myself. And I dont want to be there for myself anymore. Im just so tired. I try all of the calming methods. I was so spiritual. Now theres nothing left.
And I dont know what to do. And I used to be so radiant and driven. And I just feel like a black hole now. I went through something that I thought I could never recover from. But I was able to push through it.
But now??? Nothing that bad has happened and I am feeling at my lowest. I just don't get it. I dont know what happened to me. And I want to be free so bad. | depression |
I never tried drinking, i just turned 18 and i am now elgible to drink. I never thought of drinking but i am in a really huge depression so can anyone tell me that if drinking makes it better or worse ? Please i really am going through alot and i heard people say drinking makes you forget things and it makes you move on when you are sad but is it true? I really wanna drink if i can get rid of my depression by drinking. | depression |
As stated, I'm an adult (51yo Male) who was finally diagnosed with ADHD. With a TOVA test score of -9, and a formal discussion with a Psychiatrist, I've finally been diagnosed with what I have known since High School.
I barely completed HS (because I was smart enough to fake most everything), and I never completed college (after 11yrs of trying). I've lost multiple jobs (or quite because I just couldn't do the work). I am in a great job that I don't want to lose, and I need help to succeed, so I decided to look for medical help.
Due to an unfortunate series of events, I have found myself out of state caring for my mom who broke both her legs... and my official diagnosis was done via a 'teledoc' visit. Since I am out of state, and the doctor can't prescribe a controlled substance (Adderall) into another state, I have to wait until I return to my home state to get my first ever prescription.
I guess if I've waited this long... what's another week or so.
Anyway, I'm still excited about the possible results. | ADHD |
I won’t get into detail but what I mean is say someone does something that triggers your PTSD, and then you continue interacting with them. Then later down the line, you’re triggered by remembering your interactions with them vs the actual originating event (ex. Childhood trauma)
Does anyone else have this happen to them? I feel like I can’t have normal social life or just a normal life in general because if I’m triggered by something the people and place I’m in while I’m triggered suddenly become a trigger themselves. This has happened with friends, jobs, places ect | ptsd |
For the past year, I've been doing school online (as most people have) and my mental health has just astronomically improved. I hadn't realized just how much stress I was under when I was doing school in person, since that was all I had known. I had significant mental health issues before this year but they've been way more manageable now.
​
I think that being in social situations for over 8 hours per day, most of which I felt very uncomfortable (consciously and unconsciously) navigating, was just incredibly stressful for me. My school performance also improved online, as I am less stressed about school and I also feel more comfortable asking questions and participating. I am participating in some clubs through Zoom (for various reasons) but after each meeting I feel so drained and it takes me hours, even days, to recover. I can only imagine that this would be worse for clubs in person.
​
Does anyone have any thoughts as to how to approach the return to in-person? I am kind of dreading it, honestly. Disclaimer that I have not been diagnosed, but I was misdiagnosed (in my opinion) as many other things and I am now realizing that being on the spectrum seems to be more accurate.
​
(Posting from a throwaway) | aspergers |
My house is often a junk filled mess and it really stresses me out and gets me down, the house in general isn’t too bad, but my bedroom (where I spend most of my time) is never continuously tidy.
I go through stages of being obsessive over everything being in the right place and everthing is spotless for a few days then I just kind of forget and it becomes a mountain of shit again. I really like my room to be tidy it makes me feel so much better in myself but it annoys me so much that I can’t keep up and keep it nice all the time.
Any tips or advice? It’s something that’s been bothering me for years that I just can’t get around. | ADHD |
So to preface this whole issue I am a 20 year old, over weight female with ADHD. now my weight is due to pcos but other than that and chronic pain I’m healthy. I live in the uk me and my family knew I’m not normal weather it was excessive daydreaming, poor focus and being smart but not being able to translate it (literally teachers had to sit with me and translate my work). I got tested for Asd as a kid but they said nope it’s just dyspraxia and dyslexia, as an adult I learned more about adhd and after research and talking to doctors/ therapist (under the nhs) I got diagnosed within 6 months and then was put on 18mg of delmosart.
The actual issue delmosart helps soo much I’m able to function as an adult and take care of myself it’s awesome… but the medication causes heart palpitations followed by dizziness when exercising ie walking to work, cycling ec. I can do all these with no issues when I’m not on it because of this I contacted my doctor who told me to stop taking it and she’ll book a test with the therapist so we can see what to do.
A month later when I spoke to therapist and told her that it’s significantly improved my quality of life but it’s causing heart palpitations and dizziness spells she told me that we should look into my lifestyle and restart taking the delmosart and she didn’t want to try other medication as they have the same risk profile.
I’m honestly frustrated they are the only nhs service I can get referred to in my area by my GP and other services are too far 1 hours train/bus ride or private specialist is £190-£220 per appointment which I can’t afford. I don’t know what to do because when on this medication it improves my quality of life but is detrimental to my health but off it I struggle to take care of myself and chores.
Any recommendations? | ADHD |
In my family, I only in the past year got diagnosed with OCD but my parents were super reluctant to acknowledge it or even mention that it was a problem because most of my compulsions are mental or have been something I've done for years.
Lately, when my stepdad is being really particular about being clean my mom will mention and say oh it's just his OCD which ticks me off a little bit.
She also loves to say literally anyone who has ever been a little bit of a neat freak or obsesses over certain things (like really gets into reading) has a little OCD.
It makes me feel really weird because she is super fine casually mentioning that anyone else might have OCD or be "a little OCD" but she won't acknowledge what I was feeling or that it was such a huge part of my life.
I am graduated from therapy now and have sub-clinical OCD now (which is huge because I went from severe) but I feel a bit infuriated when she makes comments like these.
Does anyone else get comments like these? What do you do about them? | OCD |
I don't get crushes, and have a hard time liking people romantically. I'm 31 and have never had a long term romantic/sexual relationship. I do go on dates, but generally don't like anybody enough to want to have a relationship with them. I'm really worried I'm never going to be able to have a long term relationship. I see other traumatized people who have had long term relationships, just not necessarily healthy ones, and I haven't even had one, because it's so hard for me to find someone I like enough. I'm not aromantic, and very much desire romantic love, I just don't like anyone enough. Anyone else experience this? How do you deal with it? | ptsd |
Hi,I am assuming that I am not sure I have OCD, I was sure because I found myself in all the symptoms .. It all started years ago with the thought "what if I were gay?"
from that moment I thought of myself doing things with men to see if I was aroused or something ... I got over it by myself thinking that even if I were gay there would be nothing wrong, and in fact after a while all the intrusive thought and the anxiety about it disappeared ..
Years later in a moment of strong anxiety I had an aggressive intrusive thought, I had the most powerful panic attack of my life at that moment and for years I constantly brooded over because I had that thought, that I did not want to do it etc ... finally I went to a therapist because I could no longer control my anxiety although I was having good times and others of anxiety. Now I would say that I got over it thanks to the therapist.
But now I'm going through a terrible time, with another obsession ..
The therapist diagnosed me with depression anyway.
I have had an incest kink for years, Mom / son
I never worried too much about it thinking that it is so much just a sexual fantasy, but two months ago I had the thought "what if I actually want to do sexual things with my real mother?"
I am sure I do not have Oedipus complex, I do not have any of the symptoms, I do not find my mother physically attractive and I have never looked at her in a sexual way, I have a good relationship with my parents even if we are not particularly connected, I have a girlfriend for many years and our relationship is great.
The fantasy of incest mother / son goes to periods, sometimes weeks / months pass that I don't "use" it, sometimes it is more present ..
Usually when I have this fantasy I imagine that I am the actor / character in the video and the woman in the video is my mother ..
I am terrified at the possibility that this means that I am attracted to my real mother but I absolutely do not want to, the thought haunts me many hours of the day, I am afraid to talk about it with anyone .. I hope it is OCD
Edit: I'm terrified that I may have thought about my real mom in the video in the past or that if the opportunity arises I would do something in real life
The throught of a sexual thing with my mom make me feel uncomfortable and when i see her i don’t have any urge or something
I feel like a monster | OCD |
Every time I try to watch some of my favorite movies I can’t focus on the movie properly. Its like my brain is distracting me. Like almost talking to me. I just want to enjoy it. I’m getting thoughts like this movie isn’t the best or something. I can’t explain it clearly. It’s just sad that some of the movies that mean the most to me are basically nothing now to me. | OCD |
I’m usually running late for things.
I either underestimate how long things will take, get distracted by something stimulating, or I often
can’t find something I’m looking for.
What do you suggest might help me with my punctuality? Is there anything that has helped you?
Note: there are no right or wrong answers! :) | ADHD |
I got a date with someone I thought was real awesome. After breakfast we were did laps around the block for hours talking, two and a half hours. She seemed real into the conversation and having a great time. I ask if she's keen to organize something and she said "yup, we can definitely sort something out!" and even giggled as I did an unprompted little celebration. Then when I text her my number there's no reply. Only a read receipt.
Then looking back, the time replaying in my mind, I realise all this shit came out. I almost never looked into her eyes. I spoke most of the time and it came out more talking 'at' her about politics, or religion, or philosophy, or movies. She was involved in the conversation and went along and offered her opinion on stuff but like, her main thing was gardening. I was so hung up on what I was talking about as I always am I simply lose track and prattle on.
I just hate this. I just hate knowing all my social flaws are dot points in some diagnosis and trying to change them, but then they just revert back as soon as I let down my guard with someone. It's just hopeless and sad. I felt like I had the best day and she probably felt like I was some boring git who talked about his own subjects for hours and like she was barely there. I feel horrible.
Sorry for the infodump, I'm just so down about it. I gotta quit dating again because I'm just not in the headspace. I can't have a date with a mostly total stranger that even spending the day affect me so much. But yeah the social issues around ASD are a major pain. Since my embrace of ASD as part of my condition and not masking, socially I feel like I fell off a cliff. | aspergers |
I struggle with intrusive thoughts ( probably like... 99 percent of all of you do) but i've had this horrible thought recently that my father sexually abused me as a child. I want to clarify that I know this did not happen. I don't remember a lot from my childhood but I know sexual abuse was never something I dealt with. Although I know this didn't happen, my brain is like.. trying to trick me into thinking it could of happened due to lapses in my memory. I just don't know if this constitutes as an intrusive thought? A false memory? Idk...
Does anyone have a similar experience or something? I'm not seeking medical advice.. just comfort or something ugh | OCD |
I think this is why I have almost constant thoughts of suicide. Why I don’t have any hope for the future, in fact I don’t give a single shit about my future at all anymore and why I don’t think I’ll ever be able to heal from any of this shit and my life with never be better. Cause it doesn’t seem to matter what I do, what situation I’m in, what my current circumstances are, I fucking hate it.
For example I can’t stand living with other people. I live with people now and I absolutely fucking hate it. I hate that I basically never get any time to be completely by myself at all. I never get to listen to loud music or play my guitar if I want to, can’t call therapists or whoever if I’m in a crisis cause I don’t have enough privacy so people would overhear. And honestly, if I did call someone right now, they’d more than likely hospitalise me which I can’t have because then I’d have to explain myself and it would be a big fucking dramatic thing. But then I lived alone for a long time too and that sucked too. I was just fucking lonely all the time which doesn’t make any sense cause I don’t even *want* to be around people, especially in my own space.
Along that vein, I also don’t do well having friends at all. I’m so fucking unstable it’s all I can do to stop myself from telling them to fuck off one minute only to regret it and apologise later but then feel the urge to do it all over again. So rather than put people through that, I just prefer to isolate myself from them but then when they do contact me I have to put on a facade so they think I’m consistent and if I don’t have the energy to do that anymore, they see how fucked I am and they leave. I get a genuine sense of relief from cutting people off. I move around every year or two and getting to delete all my social media and block all the phone numbers of people I knew in the last place makes me feel like I can breathe again. But then I also have literally zero friends or anyone else right now and I still can’t help feeling so fucking alone even though I know if I had a friend I’d feel suffocated and hate it.
I can’t hold down a fucking job because if I work for long periods for time, especially in places where I have to be around people a lot or customer service or some shit, I either go into psychosis, attempt suicide or become so dissociative I’m virtually catatonic. But then if I don’t work I feel like a complete fucking loser.
I can’t even be a fucking proper, consistent addict. Used to drink all the time, was permanently drunk but I hated being drunk or high or whatever, but I hate being sober equally as much so I drink heavily or do drugs for three months, go cold turkey for 6, then get sick of it and go right back.
I feel like a walking fucking contradiction, I just don’t make sense. Don’t think I fucking belong here. | ptsd |
Didn't get diagnosed until this year in my early 30s. My whole life, I was always confused by how people would just do things. Like someone would say, "Oh I'd like to X" and then just... do it. It just boggles my mind. It could be a chore like doing the dishes or a hobby like making something creative in the shop or something social like going to meet someone for coffee or even things like quitting a bad habit. At best, any of those tasks take days (weeks? months?) to hype myself up enough to actually do them. I have to think about it a lot and eventually my mind warms up to the idea enough that I can set a plan to do it (or maybe a plan to set a plan to do it) and eventually it might happen. Or it might never happen, as is often the case with anything that could be considered optional (how do people have hobbies?). Strike while the iron's hot? Friend, my iron is NEVER hot, I don't know what the hell you're talking about.
TL;DR How do people do things? I clearly have problems with executive function. | ADHD |
I’m a freshman in highschool and ever since 7th grade I’ve lost essential feeling. I don’t feel guilt when I miss a assignment or get a bad grade. I just brush it off and continue. I have no motivation to get anything done. I haven’t done my laundry in a month. I can only do small task before just breaking down and space out. This shits effecting me in school and home bad. I can’t connect to my dad at all and our relationship is falling fast. Schools a shit show, I’m failing math and have a D+ in science. I can’t do anything and I hate my self so much for it. I just want to fix it but I can’t | depression |
How do you get help or get out of that mood when you know the problems are so small and you can’t help but feel crushed by them. The smallest things makes me feel completely out of energy I can’t help myself but believe I shouldn’t be this sad for that. It’s like the smallest imperfection means the whole day is ruined and I don’t know how to get out of that mindset | ADHD |
Hello everyone, I currently work at a Starbucks inside of an Albertsons (7 months) so it isn’t too busy or chaotic. I love how many social skills it has taught me and it has honestly strengthened my ability to mimic that NT small talk, but also how to exist with them for hours at a time (my coworkers). The only downside to this education I’m receiving is that it is very draining to act in accordance to the customer and coworker expectations so I’m not judged for how I truly am. Whilst I do enjoy acting natural and not masking, I just feel the judgement. I cannot handle it when I have to see these people on a daily basis. Considering everything, I really want to get a new job where I don’t have to talk to customers or coworkers much at all. My issue with that is that it means I have to start all over with coworker and management relations. My current manager is extremely flexible and understanding, so it makes the job a lot more bearable.
Should I pursue a new job that will have to last for at least 3 years or should I just stay where I’m at? If the former, any recommendations? | aspergers |
It is well known that a characteristic of human beings is the need for acceptance, but I am unable to feel accepted
How am i supposed to do it
I accept neurotypicals, and I try to understand them, only as an attempt to make things better, and when I try to correct one, it is because correction is necessary to understand your mistakes, and understanding is necessary to try to fix them, that it is the most effective way to improve as a person
But they act as if understanding is a requirement for acceptance, and I understand that fear of the unknown, but this happens to me with my own family
And although I would love to be able to talk and communicate face to face with other autistic people in a city with 220,000 inhabitants in a third world country (Concepción, Chile) with little interest in mental health and that as far as possible there is no meeting point where we can meet i guess i lost the game
Any suggestions on how to fix this? | aspergers |
Is anyone fluent or near fluent in another language? If so, has said proficiency helped you find employment ?
I know for example if you know Arabic or Chinese your opportunities for work rose dramatically. I’m trying to learn Portuguese partly because of the large amount of Brazilians that are a market opportunity | aspergers |
Was in my GSA club and the club leader was very nice and interested in what this girl was saying and everytime I spoke she would give me very basic And uninterested responses I feel very depressed now even more than I was already idk if I'm reading into this interaction to much I just feel so boring and I'm so lonely | aspergers |
Very often we just keep thinking about things- big things viz career change, moving to a new house, starting/ending a relationship or even things as small as fixing a leaking sink.I am increasingly noticing a pattern in my behaviour that these all things are constantly on the back of my mind..l make notes, l list as priority etc etc but when it comes to actually tackling them (especially the big things viz career change relationships etc)I am stuck in the same loop for years thinking/planning exit strategies all the time and growing weary and exhauted.
l am beginning to think that maybe there’s a way (probably slightly painful) way of dealing with these? Like ripping off a band aid..sort of way of making decisions which might eventually give you some contentment, peace etc.
l was wondering if any of you have been in a similar place and what is /are the strategies you follow to de clutter your life?
TLDR: How to declutter your life and make quick efficient decisions on big things in your life without being stuck? | ADHD |
I'm a 20 year old college student who left college to try other things but is now back for computer science (woo).
Problem is, everyone my age is so ahead of me in their schooling, their skills, things they know and can do (heck, one girl in my campus ministry learned html in 2 weeks. I barely started python). It just feels so excluding to know thay you can't relate to those around you because of how behind you are, and therefore you feel like you weigh down the group with ignorant insights and whatnot, because in my mind that's what I am to them: an ignorant fool who couldn't figure out what he wanted to do with his life early enough.
Has anyone else ever felt this way about a group you were in? If so, how did you go about overcoming or at least coping with it to the point where you could start breaking down these misconceptions within yourself? | depression |
I woke up groggy, had a mental breakdown and called out of work, risking my job while already two months late on rent, went outside to get high, came back and the door is locked and I didn't bring a key, and my gf is asleep with the door to our room closed. | depression |
Like the title says, what if I don’t have ADHD. I’m undiagnosed and my parents won’t let me get tested, and since I started highschool it’s really became clear to me how much I struggle with things like executive function, and when I started to look into it I assumed I had ADHD and it became a way for me to cope in a way.
The idea that I had ADHD always gave me comfort. It meant I wasn’t just stupid kid who can’t do basic things without sitting on a coach for hours preparing. The kid who understands everything in math class perfectly but still gets bad grades because he always forgets to move a negative down. The kid who struggles in relationships because he will just forget they exist because his brain decided that other things are more important than his relationships.
Through all of these things happening to me I have been able to keep a pretty high self esteem and not beat my self up to much because I could always just say it’s my ADHD, but what if it’s not.
After looking a lot more in depth this past year I’ve noticed that I don’t fit a lot of the typical ADHD symptoms. I don’t struggle with RSD. Struggle with heightened emotions but not all that often. Don’t have an issue working in a quite room during things like tests, and to be totally honest I feel like an imposter because I’m a really smart kid who gets good grades and all my teachers love me.
If I don’t have ADHD then what is wrong with me? Are all my struggles my fault?
If I do have ADHD why do I feel so different from you guys?
Not looking for a diagnose just want empathy and support | ADHD |
I never thought I’d be able to say this, but I haven’t experienced intense intrusive thoughts for months, and the need to do compulsions is pretty much gone. I’ll still occasionally get very mild intrusive thoughts but I can usually get rid of them fairly quickly. I don’t remember ever being this happy, I feel like I’m finally enjoying life | OCD |
*TRIGGER WARNING***⚠️
(Substances, psychosis, sexual abuse)
I (22nb) have been dating my fiancé (24m) for four years now. We both suffered from cocaine addiction going through schooling and as you know, drugs can be very dangerous with trauma involved. This has resulted in lots of psychosis, near fatalities, and just tons and tons of traumatic experiences that we have lived through together. We would often combine other drugs including psychedelics. There was one time I took acid and he took acid and then started doing cocaine, but I did not take any cocaine which kind of threw us off the same wavelength. I experienced a lot of memory loss at the time, and continue to relive bits and pieces of this night. However, we planed to have sex and he stoped in the middle of it and tried to have a serious conversation with me. I was so high that I was completely unresponsive/catatonic apart from random spurts of giggling or playfullness not for any particular reason other than the sensations I was experiencing. He was trying to tell me that he loved me and I would just laugh at him and stare off into the distance, which caused him to spiral into a suicidal headspace and manifesting extreme distrust towards me (Maybe he was dealing with some of his own unresolved trauma it seemed like). Fast forward to the end of our trip, I looked down at him and his leg was gushing blood from self mutilation. It started coming back to me that I sparse memories in my subconscious of seeing him cut himself with a steak knife in tears and saying that he was going to kill himself because he didn’t know what to do. He told me that I was still touching myself sexually as this was happening and trying to be sexual/playful with him. No where in my right mind would I do any of these things. I love this man more than my life itself and if It ever crossed my mind he was suicidal, I would do everything in my power to protect his life. He told me I pissed myself, and I threw myself into the wall and broke a piece of furniture by jumping on it which probably scared the shit out of him. I thought I was not real and stuck in a simulation. I had never had any problems with anger management or had any desire to or reason to sexually assault people like this in the past, let alone the love of my life. I woke up with cuts and bruises all over my arm and didn’t remember how they got there. I had never had an adverse reaction to psychedelics like this before either. Now I live through this night over and over again and I’m still with him. He told me everything was fine and to forget about it but it’s not fine at all and I have never been able to forget about it. He has never mentioned it again to this day.
Fast forward, now we are both free from addiction and have been completely sober for about a year and a half. We have honestly been doing very well together, but I am attempting to live with ptsd alongside a huge trigger: him. I struggle to have sex with him without thinking of this night. I also struggle with doubting whether or not he actually loves me still because of what I did (even though he has done everything under the sun to tell me otherwise).
We connected very well before we fell into addiction, and we’re best friends for a year before we got in to a relationship, so at least I can be assured that it is not a trauma bond that formed us. I just want him to be happy. I feel guilty for existing next to him every day having done the things that I did. Has anyone else recovered or partially recovered from ptsd that developed from an intimate relationship and have still been able to be involved with this person or grown from it? I am going to bring this issue to my therapist but I was too nervous so I just needed to get it out of my system here to feel confident enough to finally talk to someone about this. I know that it’s not right to talk to my fiancé about how I feel about something that involves my abuse towards him. He agreed to go to therapy with me for my anxieties but I haven’t been super open about what they stem from because I don’t want him to be re-traumatized either. There are more incidences I haven’t mentioned but this is the one that really sticks out to me. Although thankfully there has been no traumas after we became sober.
We really want to be with each other. I am just trying to find the best way to go about healing from this trauma. (Before you say something, yes, we have agreed to never do acid again).
EDIT: The sexual assault was me trying to involve him when he clearly wasn’t okay with being involved in anything sexual. I was trying to coerce him into having sex with me when he didn’t want to. He had told me afterwards that he had been telling me to stop and I didn’t. Rereading my OP, I didn’t explain this very well I’m sorry. Even though my head was in another dimension, I’d still consider this sexual assault if someone did that to me. | ptsd |
I've been struggling with what I found through a NOCD article, is termed "Race OCD". I constantly worry that I'm being perceived as racist. I'm white, I consider myself to be an ally of BIPOC and to work on being anti-racist. Lately though, I get hit with a ton of intrusive thoughts about coming across as racist when I speak to a BIPOC, which causes anxiety, which my anxiety probably then appears racist to the other person. I can't imagine what BIPOC have to endure on a daily basis just because of their skin color, so I'm not trying to make this about me. I'm just wondering if I'm alone in this or if other people struggle with this OCD theme. To be honest, it's pretty severe and it's attacking my core, because this "theme" feels opposite to what I value (being an ally, fighting to be anti-racist & dismantle racism) & who I am. I can tell that other people notice I'm anxious, and I just hate that I'm displaying nervousness because im sure it makes the other person uncomfortable.
I know I'm coming off as anxious to other people. I know it because I'm trying so hard not to be perceived as racist, to get the interaction "right", that interactions just get weird, anxiety filled & awkward & I'm sure the other person is like wtf, this person is a racist. I don't know how to stop getting so lost in my head. I've tried to tell myself "Maybe I am a sick, racist human being, oh well", but that doesn't help because I don't agree with that statement.
I hate that interacting with BIPOC has become a trigger for me & that my anxiety is probably making people uncomfortable & they see me as a racist. I feel awful. | OCD |
I finally decided to start treatment for my ADHD recently (23/F) and had very high hopes for the process. My doctor wanted to start me off on Straterra because it was non-habit forming and a non-stimulant, with the potential of treating my anxiety as well while I have been taking Prozac for 3 years. The first day or so I felt off and sick but I attributed that to my body adjusting to the medication. However, on day 5 my HR spiked while I was seated at my desk at work to 140bpm and dropped very fast causing me to feel nauseous and dizzy. I stopped taking Straterra after that because I knew that something was not right. The following day the same thing happened but this time my HR was 165bpm and sustained leading to me being advised by my doctor to head to the ER. All of my lab work was fine and the reaction was deemed the Straterra which I will no longer take. I’m wearing a heart monitor for the next few weeks just to ensure everything is fine. This I found out is a rare side effect of the medication and I couldn’t find any similar experiences anywhere and wanted to share mine. | ADHD |
I'm not talking about puberty, but about "milestones" and life experiences. I feel as though I have consistently lagged behind my peers my entire life. | aspergers |
It's not worth it if in the end I'm always left w nothing..surrounded by nothing, my life's a lie and everyday is a failed attempt of trying to run away from how empty it feels to live. But I'll keep running regardless..that's the only amusement I can get out of it. No matter what I say or do nothing changes. So everything I do ultimately ends up being pretend and the moment I snap out of it I realize how pointless it was to get so invested in nothing..the constant back and forth is fucked tho...I wish the times where I can truly let go and embrace nothing could last forever. Bc that's what I am | depression |
I had a bit of a bad time today with contamination OCD. I dropped something on the ground at work today and got really frustrated and angry, because I know everytime that happens I have to wash my hands. I also picked up some food for my mom and as I was driving home I had to brake pretty hard and the bag fell over onto the floor on the passenger side, and I screamed, and I was agitated for a good hour or two after that. My mom is also sick and when she’s sick I’m afraid to be around her or touch anything she touched. | OCD |
I love my cat but let's be honest.. He's a walking missfortune, a slouch.. He always gets injured or sick to no fault of his own or us.
I really don't want him to get sick but knowing him.. He most likelly will.. That's why when I was talking with my boyfriend about cat's life expectancy I said "I really hope this won't happen but let's be honest.. There's no way my cat won't get cancer".
Now I think I caused him to get cancer in 10 years.. | OCD |
29 year old male. Over the past year I have generally made strong progress with my mental wellness -through a combination of actively practicing mindfulness/meditation and self-acceptance. I turn 30 in January, and I feel 2022 is finally the year I will enter a sense of personal and psychological security. Although I am aware it will be an ongoing journey which requires work and self-discipline on a consistent basis.
One area I'm really struggling with though is my endless procrastination. I am not talking about work or study procrastination.... **I am talking about extreme procrastination and lack of focus when I'm supposed to be doing things I like.**
For example I came home from a weekend trip this evening. I looked forward to an evening of reading a book, maybe doing some interesting internet browsing. Instead I spent the whole evening stalking random people on Instagram and Facebook who I don't even know, and just generally opening one app after the other. 4 hours have now passed since I got home and I feel depressed knowing I wasted another evening.
I know many people do this in our smart-phone invested world. But it's extremely common for me, I'm always doing it. As mentioned, it's a familiar depressing feeling - another wasted evening doing compulsive behavior instead of things that will actually make me happy.
**Furthermore, I have the self-awareness to understand why I'm doing it - it's an avoidance mechanism to deal with the numbness I will feel when I'm supposed to be doing things I like. Endless procrastination is an avoidance mechanism for me to deal with the numbness, depression, and discomfort I feel within myself. In fact, the idea of doing these activities in the first place seems like a huge effort. Which is what they often say about depression, there is an aversion to activities which one usually likes -** **or enjoyable activities start to become a huge effort.**
It's good that I understand the reasoning behind this behavior, that is a starting point. But to be honest I have understood this is the reason for a while, and still haven't found a solution to reducing this behavior.
What I'm looking for are psychological strategies and mechanisms which will help me stop this self-sabotaging behavior. For example when it came to mindfulness, I asked for advice on how to become more mindful during the day as I was struggling to do it consistently. Somebody suggested downloading the 'Mindfulness Bell' app and that has helped me greatly in acting as a reminder to be more mindful.
Ultimately this is a defence mechanism against underlying depression, I'm aware of that. But another wasted evening of 3/4 hours doing nothing exacerbates this depression and anxiety further. It's a vicious, vicious cycle.
If someone can relate to this, and can provide actionable psychological mechanism and strategies to help me with this, I would be entirely grateful. Thank you. | depression |
How do I stop these feelings when it's just a result of the truth?
If I died right now, I'm not saying no one will be sad, but no one will really miss my presence.
I dont have kids or a partner. I care for my elderly mother but she just needs me here to cook and clean.
Both siblings have their own lives and rarely check in. I don't blame them, their families are important..
I thought I was close with my friends but feel like I'm always checking on them and asking how things are with them and offering my time to help. But almost no one wants to know how I am. Every now and then they'll ask but the conversation almost immediately goes back to them.
I have one friend who does ask most days we talk and even remembers when I say important things have happened and asks me how those things are going. But she is going through some really tough times and I can't expect her to pay any attention to me being all needy. Besides, she has a family and people who rely on her already.
So anyway, I've come to this conclusion that if no one cares how I am in life, they won't miss me when I'm gone.
Thanks for listening (reading). I think I just needed to put this somewhere as it just keeps going around and around in my head. | depression |
Has anyone ever experienced worrying over contacting a disease and before you know it you abandon your present worries and another event makes you worry more and it looks like your present worries are bigger than the last one then it goes on and on | OCD |
Well, I’m awake. It doesn’t seem that late, but I couldn’t sleep last night at all so I’ve been lying in bed since 8pm. I think that I need to go back to seeing My therapist biweekly. This time it’s about a girl, and that’s it. I get so fixated on the idea that every girl that I date is “the one” and that I am going to mess it all up. Which I always do, and it’s because I get in my own head. Normally I think I would be more clear as to what my issues are, but I’m so incredibly tired focusing is massively difficult. | OCD |
I oftentimes get extremely anxious when it comes to meeting people that already know me for a long time. Whether directly or indirectly. Example: I have been going to the same place of worship for the past 13 years. I have always been extremely quiet and just the thought of going back there gives me so much anxiety. It’s almost paralyzing. I don’t know if I’m the only one who experiences this but I oftentimes don’t say anything because I don’t want to seem confident, otherwise they will look at me weird. Like I’m supposed to be anxious.
Tips? | aspergers |
All I ever wanted was someone to talk and share all my thoughts with. Is it ever gonna get any better? | aspergers |
I'm awaiting a diagnosis so I don't know if this is a thing but does anyone always feel like they have to maximise efficiency with minimal effort like minimmmaaal effort (that probably means the same thing oops) even if in hindsight you'd be better off not doing stuff like so.
For example when I am cooking and take shit out of the fridge I just have to fit as much as possible in my hands when putting stuff in the fridge to limit the amount of times I have to back to it and open the door but I usually end up stuffing myself over cause I'm dropping something or just making it real hard for myself to open the fridge and it would literally be easier to make just a couple more trips but no I never learn.
With school work like a research paper I feel like I gotta get on top of everything in one go and that usually results in me opening too many tabs and using like only a handful of them and in the process my brain is on a restless buzz that doesn't know what to do with itself despite not having consumed any possible external stimuli like coffee or meds it's liked this stress-induced trying to be productive mode but a lot of the time I haven't really done anything/much and my brain feels fried after. Other days, it's feeling like I gotta do it all, get overwhelmed, then do nothing and then feel like poop after but then try to reassure yourself that it's a problem for tomorrow rinse and repeat.
Sorry for the large chunks of texts 😁 | ADHD |
I just joined this community, I hope it can help me with what I’ve been dealing with. I get triggered a lot and once it happens all my brain is consumed with is my abuser. Most times I immediately start to break down but other times I just dissociate in a way. | ptsd |
I was fine i was okay and suddenly my mind conjures up a very disgusting p o c d thought/memory of me doing something gross even though I don't remember or recall doing such thing
I thought i was over this, every little memory that i have gets scrutinized to the point of me questioning every little thing i did
It's all what if, what if, what if
What if indeed did i do that? I wouldn't want to continue honestly but not having everything in place seems wrong and i have to find out...... | OCD |
Like for me, literally forgetting to drink water so much or not even understanding my body's signal that I NEEDED water until I eventually got hemorrhoids.
Sitting and staring at my phone for hours in fear of calling up a client for a simple thing because of my rejection sensitive dysphoria (especially if the client has already yelled at me on one, or two, occasions) and because of that paralysis thing that we get.
Hyperfixating on patterns in human behaviors that I usually already intuitively know or could basically guess their childhood traumas/upbringing. If I don't, I hyperfixate on them until I eventually understand WHY.
Obsessively buying about a thousand planners and notebooks that are empty or filled with rubbish, rather than, actual things I should be planning about.
The fact that I literally CAN'T haul my ass off to get my ADHD meds.
Anyway, what's yours? | ADHD |
This is just a post to see who can relate. I think covid exposed to me just how long I can go without needing to interact with people outside of my home. I think it was about 4 months until I kinda wanted to see anyone. Honestly, I was happy with this arrangement as I'm sure many of us were (tho obviously quarantines in general are bad coz it means the virus is still a concern). But I also think it indulged all my worst isolationist tendencies. I'm now anxious about leaving the house, and very nervous to start driving again. I also feel like I'm more sensitive to light and sound these days since I'm usually just in my room. Anyway I wanted to see if anyone felt similarly. I'm a college student to returning to campus next semester. | aspergers |
I think I’ve finally cracked the code. All this practicing ERP and fighting compulsions, trying to deal with my thoughts better, don’t help me as much as just letting my mind and soul get tired of dealing with this.
I thought I’d never see the day again where I finally start getting back to feeling like my old self on a more consistent basis. I think I just no longer care to deal with OCD, no longer care to let these thoughts and urges bother me, I think it’s finally starting to give up. I’ve had flashes of this over the last 6 months, but I’ve had yet to feel this confident. I just had to give it time, and be patient.
I’m still having some anxious moments but they aren’t as strong, and I’m having way more days of feeling good over the last couple weeks. I think this is just bracing uncertainty, remembering I have control over my life and my decisions, and knowing what I truly want. I hope one day that everyone else suffering finds their way, and realizes that life works itself out in the end. | OCD |
I need to get a part time job. Nearing the end of 12th grade and need money when I go to university.
Looked through my country's job offer app. All I can do is work at a convenience store with my current resume which sums up to zero.
I mean I would take it, but I don't know if I could do it. Papers and work. Customers being an ass. (And we got some good amount of screaming drunk people at night) I suck at everything and I'm bound to mess up. Will get hurt for every rude customer and mistakes I make then cry at my bed.
I just don't want to try "job" I guess. | depression |
Hello!
I am going to explain this thought the best I can and maybe I can get some feedback. My intrusive thoughts have always been sexually taboo, but they have also been intrusive thoughts for the most part…never really have dealt with False Memory until now.
The main theme I deal with is ZOCD (zoophilia). For as long as I can remember this thought absolutely repulsed me and instilled such fear and disgust.
The other day I woke up and pulled my dog up onto my bed and went back to sleep. I remember getting an intrusive thought and then I went back to sleep. I woke up and a couple hours later the “what if the thought wasn’t a thought and actually happened” fear flooded in. I now keep rethinking what happened to reassure myself and it’s killing me! There’s two versions of the memory…what actually happened and then this bogus disgusting version that seems so real.
How do I cope with this? | OCD |
is anyone aware of any organizations that do online support groups for OCD? ideally through zoom or something? i love this subreddit but it'd be really nice to connect with some people through a support group or something | OCD |
I am physically disabled and need my mother and other family members to take care of me. I set my own schedule for things. I will tell it to you now
I get out of bed at 10 a.m. to go to the bathroom. Usually I'm out of the bathroom at 10:40. I eat breakfast and go outside with my little brother if it is nice. I have my little brother fill up my water bottle before or at noon when I drink water. I will every half hour until the water is gone. This water is usually Bond at 2 because of the big gulps I take. After that I either go to the bathroom at 340 or 4. After that I have a little bit of time before I need to drink more water at 5:20 where I will drink water in 10 minute intervals until it is gone usually done at 5:50. Then I will wait till 7 to go to the bathroom. Usually dinner is before or after 7. I prefer it to be after 7. After using the restroom and being properly fed I will then do whatever it is I like until 9 where I have to clean up. I will ask to go to bed which is going to the bathroom and then being tucked into bed at 9:40.
If I am feeling extremely good I will stay up until 3 in the morning listening to audiobooks. If I feel extremely poorly I will make sure to do my diary earlier perhaps at 8 in audio form instead of typing.
If I do not feel well I we'll just lay in bed until I go to sleep.
I pray constantly so bad things won't happen and obsessively. It was a lot worse when I was in school and my triggers have changed a bit since then so I didn't exactly notice it until today... Where I forgot to set my clock so I've been 1 hour early on everything which makes me very very uncomfortable. I get anxious when I go home to see my family and I'm not constantly around the clock because my wheelchair has a built-in clock on it that I sent. No wonder my mom asked me if I was ready to use the restroom it was way past time but I didn't know because my clock didn't say so.
My lack of human interaction and less notice put on my OCD made me forget that I have it but I'm sure as anyone can see we're marking this list that I most certainly have it. And yes I went to Tik Tok to feel like validated. Because no one else I know has it but me. And then wasn't diagnosed by a doctor anyting everyone just always says that's what's wrong with me. | OCD |
Soooo....anyone *not* have sexual side effects from Strattera? I've never actually taken any kind of medication for my brain before and I'd love to hear non horror stories about Strattera. Especially from women. I'm newly diagnosed with ADHD and supposed to start meds tomorrow and I'm overthinking things a bit. | ADHD |
A few month ago I was diagnosed with Bipolar ll and ADHD. I've always known (since I was a kid) that there was something different about me. I went to see someone as I was having a lot of trouble doing year 12 at 20 years old. It was so, so hard for me and I needed my Mum to help me a fair bit despite having a IQ well above adverage.
So yeah, I got diagnosed with Bipolar and it just feels wrong. I've had issues when it comes to mood as I tend to get very down at times as I feel like I don't belong anywhere. When I'm happy I am very self assured and very, very passionate and determand about my career path (hypomanic apparently).
I really do not feel as though I have bipolar. I don't relate to it and it just doesn't feel right. I have been researching ASD to a huge extent (like 6 hours a day for 3 days). I have never related to anything more in my entire life. I mean my life would make sence from childhood to now in every way.
Also, my diagnoses of bipolar was very rushed, 40 minute diagnoses and not being listened to. I'm going to be seeing someone else soon. Has anyone one here had misdiagnoses before getting the diagnoses right? | aspergers |
So... how do people on the autistic spectrum feel about being publicly characterized, by the QAnon Shaman's lawyer, as "short-bus people"? #ShortBusPeople
https://talkingpointsmemo.com/news/capitol-rioters-trump-defense-comes-up-again-and-again-will-it-make-a-difference | aspergers |
https://www.reddit.com/r/PTSD_Space/comments/q4vgds/this_is_my_life_in_a_45_second_video/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
⬆️ is a link to a 45 Second video on why I have PTSD. If you watch it, then you'll understand. Please watch it if you can and I apologize for crying.
does *anyone* have any advice on how to cope with this?. it's been driving me absolutely NUTS! and I honestly cannot handle it anymore. 😭😭😭 | ptsd |
I have been an OCD patient for a long time. I have been suffering from POCD for a while.
Recently I was browsing the homepage of a porn site. I saw a video, the girl's face was invisible, but her body was small. Then unwanted thoughts came to my mind, but I previewed the video, just for a few seconds. However, I later questioned why I was doing it because I shouldn't have. Because I thought the girl might be younger. I feel guilty right now. Of course, the girl was not under age, but I can't get over this guilt.
What do you think, is this normal? | OCD |
Basically between college, work, and my social life my brain has been on overdrive. I've been hyper stressed and overthinking everything so I haven't been able to sleep in 48 hours and idk what to do. Alcohol and depressents havent helped. Neither has caffeine, exercising, nor just trying to lay in bed has helped me sleep. Does anyone have any advice or help to decide what to do from here? Sorry if this is the wrong place to ask, I'm usually a lurker | ADHD |
Hello,
I don’t really know how to start this....
My very good friend asked me if we could meet up soon but I’m very uncomfortable with social contact even if it’s my family.
I don’t want to disappoint them and they are very important to me.
It just makes me already anxious and increases my OCD....
I can’t tell them that it bothers me or makes me anxious because I’m very uncomfortable with telling close people how I feel.
Has anyone tips or advice how I could calm down or not worry so much ?
thank you in advance | OCD |
A colleague of mine noticed something today. I flinch any time a man touches me - totally benign touch from a handshake to a tap in the shoulder to get my attention.
I left an abusive relationship more than a year ago. My ex would mostly not listen when I said no and occasionally he’d hit me. Often while drunk.
I was shocked that it’s so obvious. I don’t even know I do it.
I don’t date because I’m scared to go out more than necessary. I had a friend with whom I had some intimacy but only because I’ve known him for a long time. He helped me to open my eyes while being intimate. The first few times, they were sealed shut. Anyone new is horrifying and I feel like I’ll be alone forever.
When will my body stop remembering the pain? | ptsd |
Hey everyone, just wanted to run with you a classic "does anyone else" with y'all and see if you got some experiences or coping mechanisms for this.
When I see people having a good time in society, like being seated in a group at a bar, or restaurant, or hanging outside, I am filled with extreme envy of their life. But here's the trick : I don't want to be invited to a group hangout, or a party, or a bar, or any night out... because it would be missing the crucial part : I want to be invited... AND be able to enjoy it.
If I were invited to such an event, and based on previous experiences, I would feel horrible. Not only because of the various sensory overloads, but I would also hate myself for not being able to enjoy it like all of the other people around me.
Does anyone else feel this very specific, frustrating feeling of "I wish I liked it" when seeing happy people hanging together ? | aspergers |
As many are, I’d assume, I’m currently attending Zoom University and today, I had to leave an online session because the lags (due to connections and many other thing) and distorted audio got me so irritated that I wanted to smash my iPad and everything I could see. Of course I didn’t do any of that but I had to bang my head on my pillow to calm myself down.
Does anyone else experience this? And would this be considered sensory overload? I’m still in my discovery phase so I’d like to hear what others think. | aspergers |
I dont even know why I'm posting this here. I guess it just feels good to tell someone the truth about how I feel. I'm in a situation, about to be homeless in a matter of days, completely broke and I failed high school. I just feel so angry at myself because I let this happen and didn't do anything about it. I really am just an idiot, I should have listened to my dad when he told me that. My moods gotten so bad that I started banging my head on lamp posts outside and concrete walls, even tried to get my ass beat by walking through alleys at night. I know I should get help but I dont deserve it. I don't want to die. | depression |
Note, this post was originally made for WrongPlanet, but now I'd like to share my struggles with Reddit. I'm aware that you're not willing to spend too much time reading the wall of text that will follow, which is why I've provided a TL;DR version at the bottom.
I was diagnosed with Asperger's since an early age, and while I've time and time demonstrated extraordinary skills in some fields, socializing has never really been my forte. But I'm probably one of the rare few of my kind who's actually self-aware of this shortcoming, that I've been trying to improve on it every chance I get, so I can be acknowledged and treated as no less a normal person like everyone else. So far, I've already learned about social boundaries, trying to keep things concise and on topic and maintaining eye contact, which my father told me I've improved on compared to during my school days. But even so, I'm still getting complaints that I've made others feel awkward/cringe/uncomfortable, and I'm low-key sick of it. It's even worse when such complaints are received after a very long period of time, so long that I end up assuming that they were okay with the likes of me and I get whammed in the face that it was all a lie the entire time.
Let me explain why this is so problematic to me:
If they truly feel awkward/cringe/uncomfortable with some behavior of mine, it's BORDERLINE IMPOSSIBLE to tell. There are absolutely NO red flags whatsoever to indicate that they feel that way, so I'm highly prone to falsely assuming that they're okay with it. It gives me a very good reason to be paranoid. No different than when you take a cookie from a batch but some of them are actually spiked with a very lethal poison that won't actually kill you until hours later.
And it's no less impossible to convince them otherwise either. Once you receive the dreaded "you made everyone feel uncomfortable" complaint, that's it. You're automatically in trouble. Absolutely no exceptions. It doesn't matter to them, if making others feel uncomfortable was honestly what you were trying NOT to do and really you were just trying to fit in. No matter how much you try to explain they just immediately dismiss all those as excuses and accuse you of playing the victim card.
It's what makes it even harder to accept responsibility because I should be doing that knowing I screwed up, not because some idiot misconstrued my behavior as some direct personal offense, deliberately or otherwise. (There's actually a short addressing this issue called "Modern Educayshun", look it up sometime)
Did these people even ONCE think they're the ones who's misunderstanding and go *"Hmm, that guy's behavior is a little off. I think he has some kind of mental issue, which I'm going to discuss about and address later with him."*? No. They just jump to conclusions and assume the worst out of me, that I'm trying to deliberately piss everybody off and expect me to acknowledge that without question, when really I just function a little differently. You're basically feeling uncomfortable with someone who's just different than you. What about everyone else, huh? You pass by them all the time in every public place in the world and they're all different compared to you! How come you don't feel uncomfortable around THEM too?
I can't tell you how many times in my life that I've been cut off, sanctioned, blacklisted, etc. simply because I was different; all because some idiot misconstrued my different psychology as some form of direct harassment, not because I was an obvious asshole who is actually deliberately trying to piss everybody off, no matter how they may perceive that. I once got kicked out of a gaming club ALL BECAUSE OF MY TONE. I KID YOU NOT. I PISSED OFF AN ENTIRE CLUB SIMPLY BY TALKING TO THEM. AND THEY TOLD ME THAT THEY TOLD ME "SEVERAL TIMES" BUT I NEVER EVEN ONCE HEARD THEM CALL ME OUT ON MY BEHAVIOR.
Let me tell you, that there is absolutely NOTHING more painful to an Aspie than actually trying to be no less a normal person like everyone else, only to be cruelly shut out because somehow their harmless behavior that's just different came off as what they'd call "cringe". And honestly, it's WAY worse than being called a retard. Sure, it's a very hurtful Ableist slur, but at least it doesn't give the implication that you're somehow responsible for some form of perceived offense.
To this day, I'm constantly paranoid if anyone else I've interacted with are secretly cringing at myself as a person and will cut me off for good in the future and that they told me over 9000 times about it but I never listened.
And I've seen all the other people, even Aspies like me, socialize no problem, making new connections and get new opportunities, get recognized for their skills and capabilities, even get affiliated with renowned celebrities or highly reputable companies like Apple or Pixar or Rockstar Games, but every time I try it for myself, the ONLY result I ever get is complaints saying shit around the lines of "You made everyone feel uncomfortable". NOTHING ELSE. No matter how well I try to behave, no matter how much I try to apply everything I learned in socializing, it's always the same fucking shit: *"You made others cringe", "you made everyone feel uncomfortable", etc.* And I'm BORDERLINE FUCKING SICK OF IT. They keep telling you *"you have to put yourself out there"*, but when you actually do it, those VERY people who told you that just shut you out with the same fucking bullshit, not even once acknowledging your efforts to try to be more social and more like a normal person like everyone else. And these repeated moments, only confirm my idea more and more that I've been on this entire planet's blacklist since I was born, and that continuing to try to socialize will only prove I haven't learned my lesson. I too have skills and potential, but I guess none of that shit matters since I'll always come off as some Chris Chan-esque zombie to everyone else. Could this be the #1 reason why some people in Japan become Hikikomoris? Because they too tried to be a normal person only to give up because they kept getting the same result over and over?
Now I know how Shrek feels.
So go on. Throw the same "you made everyone feel uncomfortable" bullshit at me like everybody else did and that I've ignored your over 9000 repeated warnings about it. It's not like I'll be surprised anymore.
**TL;DR**: I'm a self-aware Aspie who's fucking sick of trying to be a normal person only to get the same "you made everyone feel uncomfortable" result over and over. | aspergers |
I had a bad drug trip that caused me to dissociate comepletly and it was absolutely terrifying. I have flashbacks of it now and nightmares. Has anyone done emdr for this? My therapist do say it sounds like ptsd. Would this work? Or would it not since the trauma was of me dissociating a lot and I do have dpdr now | ptsd |
I want a therapist for OCD but I’m afraid to tell them what I think about. I don’t feel comfortable telling them my thoughts or anyone. They’re pretty bad and far from normal. I just want guidance | OCD |
Hello everyone,
One of the major issues I encounter on a day to day basis stemming from my Aspergers is the anxiety fuelled by being able to appreciate the many, many different outcomes that can happen (and hence, my love of routines because it reduces the potential of chaos and/or unplanned outcomes). There are good things about this trait; I am good at my job because of it and the routines make me happy. But the negative side can be quite overwhelming with intrusive thoughts, catastrophising and an overwhelming (and frankly needless) sense of dread.
My question is this: has any used CBD oil as a means of reducing their baseline anxiety levels and if so, did this actually work? Did you experience any side effects? Did it make you feel ‘more neutral’ (which is the emotion I’m after).
I have a bit of an ethical hurdle to get over in trying it (I am worried that if it works then I will need it for the rest of my life and I feel that someone requiring a chemical for a long time may not be a good thing for them). Therefore any first hand experience of this would be gratefully received.
Thank you for your help! | aspergers |
I have been in therapy a lot on and off since I was 8 for mental health and being unsocial and my elementary teachers couldn't stand me for it. So that was the first therapy experience ever. Now I am a student in high school who sees a therapist once every 2 weeks and I've known my therapist for 4 years only been in therapy with him for almost 3.
According to my therapist I have PTSD (it is probaly mild in compairson to yours) but it is relatively mild giving what the memories are when triggered. The problem with my therapy is I am so uncomfortable to talk about it the moment my therapist brings up trying to work on my PTSD I back out. I want to get better but its so hard if I can't even talk about it.
My triggers are certain phrases and smells....
나만 그래! | ptsd |
My uncle sexually assaulted me when I was little ongoing for a few years.
My dad had a break down and told my uncle this and then it got out to the family years ago.
Everyone has been trying to ignore it and pretend everything is okay
For the most part I stayed away for awhile except a few times
My aunt asks for my address and if I’m coming home for Xmas
Well yesterday I had a patient who looked exactly like my uncle In the face and was way bigger than me, just like when I was a kid.
Ended up crying for 25 minutes in my treatment room (I’m a massage therapist) after.
I’m a bit of a mess
Anyways this morning my aunt asks me for my address and if I’m coming home for Xmas
I finally tell her no and I won’t be coming to family gatherings if my bad uncle is there anymore
I proceed to go on an absolute rant I feel bad because I know it’s upsetting her
But it feels so fucking good
To call out my family on expecting ME to pretend everything is okay
To act like I’m okay with being at family gatherings with the man who sexually assaulted me ongoing for years as a child
To say I’m fine with living 2000 km away on my own then be with a bunch of people who enable a child molester
I feel so fucking good that I could say somewhat what I wanted.
My uncle gaslit me in the past when I tried confronting him and my grandparents told me I was making a mountain out of a molehill because I wasn’t fucked
At least one of my aunts now knows how I feel,
This isn’t the aunt that watched my uncle do it on numerous occasions either with my grandparents. They thought it was funny and laughed during it.
Fuck those people I’m so much better off without them | ptsd |
OCD is always acting as if it benefits us and has authority but is actually screwing us over. F*** you I won't do what ya tell me. | OCD |
Can I not just be use to things? Can I not just be fucking knowledgeable on things!?!? It's not like I'm just getting triggered or splitting at will or causing flashbacks or not trying to enjoy the relationship or choosing to not be open or trying to retraumatize myself over and over and fucking over again. I just want a damn break for fuck sakes. I want to be given time to fucking just accept what the fuck happend to me as a child and what has happened to me 6 fucking months ago. So Im sorry if I don't say "I love you" or something while going through a fucking episode. Just fuck off for a moment and let me just cry and act I don't know apathetic for moment or something. Fucking just FUCK OFF ALREADY PLEASE.
Jesus christ. Just let me think and calm down and just let my brain turn off for a moment. I don't want to be sweet or nice or put on a smile at this time and I just want to feel these negative emotions and just act cold for a moment. Cold to the world and to others because I just need to think and cry. | ptsd |
So! Where to Start... I´ll start where I am right now!
(Im also Bipolar) And I needed to say that first in the meaning of explaining why I actually never (really) got recommended to eat Medicine for my sever Add that been wracking my emotional life for at least a decade!
Sad but, TRUE! I started to get help and eat medicin for my Add, when I got a Burne Out for trying to Cope with everything during this amazingly hard Covid year. My partner got wary sick (Not in Covid) And my job got really out of harmony (stressful). And all broke down at once.. Left me on the floor in fragments! That I needed to pick up.. Pick up Myself and really start to question all of it!
I actually started to ask for and eat medicine 18 mg Concerta while still working!
Started at the worst timing ever... I told my doctor that I need something to get me more stable (emotionally) and that could help me through my stressful job situation! So I started to eat and I managed to maintain my suuper stressful job situation, and take care of my partner at home... It worked until i diden´t. I started to get so agitated and stressy at my jobb so I hade to call in sick and take a break! Telling them that I felt stressed out and being vulnerable led theme to fire me!
So home with a sick partner without a work, burned out and no one that understands... Just jump up that horse again.. So I stoped eating Concerta.. Afraid of it! Or that I will become hypo manic.. So For 6 moth I diden´t do anything!
Leading me to my main point of this text! How could my Doctor subscribe meds to me when I was stressed out.. When she never recommend it before due to that it could overstimulate my Bipolar disorder... And then leave me all broken with no Add meds..Afterwards..? So Now after 6 moth I started to try slowly to eat again... It works! Im starting to be able to do things... And I´m now experienced in this... bad or worse... So! Be careful and Mindful of the effects of the medicin! And Hopefully your Doctor got more check on YOU!
Take care/Mejdlen | ADHD |
So I’ve had the suicidal ocd theme for a while and I can’t express how much anxiety it’s given me, more so with the urges to want to do it even though I really really don’t want to! I’m trying to do what I’m supposed to by either remaining uncertain but I keep getting intrusive feelings and checking my emotions
So mainly my question is, to people that have gotten over this theme how did you do it and what’s the best thing to do to get better? | OCD |
Guys! I usually just passively read on here but I find that stories of people's successes are so inspiring for me and lift my spirits, so I'm gonna share.
I have been struggling with contamination OCD for a long time - I am in therapy, doing exposure but it really is baby steps for me. My therapist keeps telling me to challenge myself where it's possible though. So, I just went on my first Tinder date ever. Rode public transport without a mental breakdown, even sat down and at the cafe I sanitized my hands once and ate a cookie with my bare, unwashed hands. I haven't done this for years, idk what happened, had a huge craving to live a normal life and today I managed it. It was great, the date was good and we talked about meeting up again. I am so happy and proud right now because things like this CAN be possible. And they can be possible for you too! Never give up, go to therapy and be patient with yourselfs <3 | OCD |
Please someone help me from this hell. I cant take it anymore. It all started with change in lower front teeth. I am now hyperaware of them. My tongue goes there, rubs and pushes them all day long. I cant stop. I became hyperaware of upper teeth too. They have bumps from behind. They feel foreign. They are crowded too and every little crowded place bothers me like hell. But I cant stand having braces or aligners in mouth. All I can think off is my teeth. No matter what I do its there. 7 months. Every day. I just wish I was dead. | OCD |
I met this girl 3 years ago at college, the most incredible human being I've ever met in my life, her smile, her hair and just the way she is, there is not enough words to describe how much I'm in love this girl. We had an amazing relationship and if you asked any of my friends who'd be the first one in the group to get married, they'd point at me, just because me and her had such unbelievable chemistry and we were truly in love, nobody ever thought we'd break up.
Early 2021 I started to mess up and just reminding myself of the person who I was back then is just so embarrassing, I regret everything I did and wish I could just go back and change what happened. First time I messed up was when she asked me to quarantine to come see her, now I dont know why it seemed like such a big deal to me back then, I was supposed to be doing it anyways because the whole country was in lockdown but didnt. She was super annoyed that I wouldn't sacrifice 2 weeks just to go see her for a day, to me at the time it seemed like a big deal I'm a person that just cant be alone I need someone beside me 24/7 or else I'll just start going crazy. The whole idea of me not willing to give up 2 weeks of my life to go see her just killed her because we were already going 2 months without seeing each other. I cant remember how but we somehow managed to talk it out and move on and continue our relationship.
Next mess up, one of my friends had a birthday gathering on during the pandemic, I told her she was invited and she seemed very interested, now to me at the time I thought it was only an act because she took the pandemic very seriously, obeyed all the lockdowns and would get angry at me if I didn't. I didn't think she was actually interested in coming and I didn't peruse asking her to come again a week before the even or on the day of it, I really thought she wouldn't because of covid and thought another argument would start where shes saying that what were doing is wrong etc. after the event I learnt that she was actually serious about going and got into a heated argument where she thought I just didnt want her there. I explained myself and everything seemed to be okay until another event happened. This time it was another mates birthday, I initially invited her and she agreed on coming and then I took the invitation back because I just thought it was going to be a lads event which I later then on the day realized it wasn't. She was super pissed, I explained the situation and everything seemed fine again. Later on down the line it was Easter and my family had my auntie and uncle over, I invited her to come down and spend time with us, she said something along the lines of that she'd be down but never asked more about it, to me she just didn't seem interested in it, again I assumed that she just said it to it and didn't peruse to invite her again or even remind her a couple days before the gathering. We had another agreement I explained myself and everything seemed fine again. Same again but this time I was going for a day out to the capital with my mates a few days before me and her booked out a hotel in the capital to spend time together. It was me and my mates going to the capital city(2 hrs away) for a drinking day out and never invited her because it was all a bunch of guys and its not that I didnt want her there I just honestly didnt think about even inviting her, same again she was pissed off but I feel like this time it was mainly because I went up with my mates spontaneously a couple days before me and her me were supposed to go and going to the city is a big thing for us so she mustve been thinking like "whats the point of us going up when he was just up there 3 days ago" we sorted that out and ended up going to the city anyways and we had a good time until we got into a stupid little argument there which I thought was sorted the same day.
When we got back home to our parents house things didnt go well, she mentioned how shes been feeling as if I dont want her around me and my friends anymore which wasn't true at all. We meetup to discuss the situation but everything that I was saying didn't matter because she already painted herself that picture. I assured her that it's not true and explained everything, I thought it was sorted because everything seemed fine again(mid June). Later down the line I just noticed she stopped meeting up with me as often, I didn't pay attention to it back then because I thought she was just busy with life, she had a flight at end of summer to America for a 12 month Erasmus. Day before she left i had to beg her to meetup, initially she didnt want to because she said it'd make her feel sad, we met up anyways and that was grand, she didnt let me bring her to the airport because ''it'd make her to emotional'' I didnt push it any further.
When she got to America, she started delaying responses, usually wed be chatting everyday on snapchat sending messages every 20/30 min that changed to 1/2 hours for her. at the start I didnt pay attention to that I just thought she was busy. everytime id ask her to call she'd just ignore my message and mention something else, always played it off as if she was busy, with family or something. I thought it was something shes going through emotionally because she moved to a different country where she has to pretty much start of fresh and make friends etc. There was a time where i confronted her and asked whats going on but she just brushed it away by saying its something shes dealing with emotionally because of the new start, so i stayed back and gave her time. We still texted on snapchat and she started getting really dry with replies i could tell she was trying to avoid conversation, all this dry texting continued on for a few weeks. She got sick of it and said we need to discuss our relationship, so we did and she admitted that shes been avoiding my texts and she doesnt know why she mentioned how she still loved me and wanted to be with me but then mentioned the idea of a break until she comes back, she said she doesnt want our relationship to fizz out and said that she feels like we need to take a step back to take a step forward. I agreed and was up for doing anything because i truly wanted to be with this girl she was literally everything I wanted. We didnt talk for a couple weeks, then couple weeks after our anniversary came up and I posted her things, she didn't even acknowledge the anniversary and just messages me saying she appreciates the effort i put into things, that shouldve been a flag but I brushed it off thinking to my self ahh were on a break were properly supposed to forget about eachother.
Anyways a month after that and us not talking she gets back home for Christmas, we met up a couple days ago, I thought everything was going to be sorted and we'll be back together no problem. We're in the car and she asks me so what am I thinking in terms of this relationship, I say "i think you know how i feel, I love you and want us to be together" she heard me out and mentioned how the 6 months of the relationship prior to her departure were horrible, it just wasn't a good relationship at all. She mentioned how we should've broke up mid June because of what was going on. I said that for me that was a wake up call and I've been putting in more effort into this relationship ever since. The big part is she mentioned how she wants to make life decisions without having to base them around someone whos a whole country away, shes not sure whether she wants to stay in America or move back and because of that she wants to breakup, she didn't offer me an option to go there to her after my studies, she kept saying that she wants us to be together and that she loves me, but also wants to breakup and mentioned how its not because of the horrible 6 months we had prior to her departure. And also kept mentioning that things might work out later in the future. I literally couldn't gather my thoughts together, I never expected it to go like that, my head was going crazy and all I was able to say was like "yeah, okay, i understand" I didnt get the chance to defend our relationship, now thinking about it i dont think me defending it wouldve changed anything. I asked her when did she make up her mind and she said it wsan't something that she planned it was more of an on the spot decision. We both agreed to keeping in contact and meeting before she leaves.
Im so broken and lost at the same time, I dont know how to function anymore and it hurts so bad. I thought me and this girl would conquer everything, she was literally all i ever wanted. I messaged her saying I wasnt able to think straight during our last meet and asked to meetup again which she agreed to, so I can tell her how i feel about the situation and try defend the relationship. now i dont even know if I want that, I want us to be together but i feel like me trying to fight for us even more is just going to push her away me. Ughh I dont know I just really love the girl and want to be with her in the end. | depression |
I'm married to a wonderful husband who I now own a house with. I also have an adorable cat who I just adore. But I can't help but constantly hate my life and who I've become. I have had a very hard time grieving my old self and who I thought I would become. I had such high hopes growing up that I would become someone great by this time in my life. I had the motivation, the drive, the creativity... all of that came crashing down when I had my first psychological breakdown. Ever since then I haven't been the same. I don't even remember who I used to be anymore because it's been so long. All I know is that it's definitely not who I have become. I am a shell of the person I once was... someone who was bubbly and smiley and constantly laughing, is now someone who can barely muster the energy to get up in the morning. I've cried so many times about this that there are just no more tears left. I've had suicidal tendencies but the fear of leaving my family always stops me. My current medication makes me feel like a lifeless zombie but I can't stop taking it or else I feel like shit and it's pretty much impossible to get into seeing a therapist or psychologist about it right now. I'm tired of sadness being the only emotion I ever feel nowadays. I wish it would all just go away. | depression |
I’m staying the night at my grandma’s lake place since they had a firework show on her lake. I’m really grateful we have a nice place to stay here and that I’m able to be with my family, don’t get me wrong. I also know me saying anything would just annoy anyone else because it would seem as if I am just being too picky. However I feel highly uncomfortable sleeping here. It feels extremely unclean, and I found a hair on my pillow (hair is one of the things that bothers me the most) which instantly made me feel very anxious. I wasn’t expecting this to be an issue but here I am feeling ready to burst into tears for fear of being contaminated by all the dirty things in this pull out mattress. Oh how fun this disorder is. | OCD |
Hello, I am a beautiful long term suffer of OCD (aint we all 🤮). I have struggled since the ripe old age of 13 and had symptoms as young as 8. I am 19 now. I have had CBT twice. The pandemic and starting a degree has increased my anxiety and I’ve recently fallen back into compulsions. I have fallen into a hole. Thankfully, it is not as deep as my previous self’s hole, but a hole it is none the less. I was just wondering whether you guys think medication is probs a good idea for me? I tried sertraline at 16 and it was horrific, so I’d likely be going for Prozac. What are your guys’ experiences?? And I mean the nitty gritty:
• affect on sex drive
• personality changes
• sleep schedule
• did it make u emotionally numb?
• can it be worth it? | OCD |
Would your life be drastically improved if you were always NT, or has Aspergers given you something that others would be envious of? | aspergers |
Those of you taking and SSRI, what dosage are you taking and is it effective? | OCD |
Edit : the thing that bugs me is if i am actually should i believe this is this who i am or no ? | aspergers |
Hey. So, I am a non Christian (with no intention of becoming one) who really LOVES Christian music. Everything from old traditional hymns to contemporary Christian music to black gospel. I am actually Hindu and I love the devotional music of my own religion as well. Do you think this is strange? I also like certain Bible quotes too and I sometimes have Christian themed dreams when I am sleeping.
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What do you think about this? | aspergers |
These are some general strategies I've developed. I'm not perfect at them and they don't always work. But they do help at times.
For me, mindfulness has been beneficial in terms of trying to take a step back from intrusive thoughts and identifying them for just being that- intrusive thoughts. It doesn't always work but it has helped.
I also find exercise important for improving my overall mood.
Staying busy with work and being social helps me to transfer my attention from the internal mind to the external world around me.
Avoiding reassurance seeking is important, but sometimes it's nice to have a coffee with a friend and just share that I'm feeling a bit down or anxious in general terms - support from those who are close to me is beneficial.
Understanding and accepting that it is impossible to be happy all the time has been important for me. It's okay to feel down at times and it's pretty much part of being human.
Apart from therapy and medication, what are some small things that you find helpful? | OCD |
(To clarify, the title’s just kind of an attention grabber. I don’t know if Lyme gave me ADHD. I don’t know what are the coincidences of my situation, and what elements of my life may be complete fallacies. This is kinda what I’m trying to figure out by looking into this part of my history.)
Hello! So, some backstory: when I was around six or seven, I was diagnosed with Lyme disease. It’s odd, I don’t personally remember anything about that period of time when I was sick.(and everything before and after has become foggy as well) However, I do have my parents to recount what the experience was like. I think it lasted about 4 weeks, and we caught it early on due to my having a bullseye rash. I got tested, got antibiotics, and got better relatively quick.
However, everything about me seemed to change after I recovered. I got super hyperactive, super inattentive, incredibly impulsive, and my memory had become worse. My mom says I was literally crawling all over, running off- all that. I was exhibiting many of the trademark symptoms of severe ADHD. So, my mom took me to the doctors- I got tested, and there was no doubt that I had ADHD. I was prescribed medication and that was it.
I only heard this “story” about a year ago, and it resonated deep inside me. I don’t remember ever not having ADHD, all I’ve ever known is this perpetual chaos I live in. Everything about me(thoughts, memories, etc.) exists in the present and future, excluding a range of maybe 3 or 4 years in the past- but it’s all fuzzy. My memories are all skewed. And it doesn’t help that my memory is so horrible that I don’t retain feelings on these things either- giving me no insight as to whether I’ve changed over the years.
Focusing back on the Lyme component- I’m almost 15 now, and my ADHD is getting so, so much worse. This has had me thinking about just me in general. It seems ADHD is what makes up the larger portion of my life now, so I’ve done some thinking about the origin of my deficit. And of course, like many other ADHD people, I frequently question whether what I’m dealing with is truly ADHD. Specifically, I’m now wondering if I have something I’ve never heard of that originated from my Lyme infection.
I’ve done a bit of research into whether Lyme can cause ADHD, and I’ve found nothing(other than the fact that Lyme can be confused for ADHD)This has caused me to panic, and I’m so scared that I am something new, as I’ve always felt more- I guess- severe, than those I’ve spoken to who also have ADHD. And yes, I understand that it’s a fundamental part of the human psyche to assume you are the only one going through something tough during times of desperation. But I can’t help my mind wandering, and my anxiety fluttering.
Honestly, I just want thoughts in general on this topic. It’d be great to hear if anyone else has gone through something similar with Lyme Disease and ADHD, as we really know so little about it’s neurological impacts. I’d also just appreciate thoughts in general, as I’m feeling very confused about all aspects of this right now. | ADHD |
I feel so bad for it. I end up snapping every so often at my boyfriend, or just... getting in a really sh\*tty mood at even the mention of porn positivity (like consuming porn or talking about people enjoying it.. things like that) I just get so uncomfortable.
I was groomed with porn both 3D and 2D. After it when I was much younger I made porn my entire personality in hopes to receive the attention I craved and was molded into liking. I get really uncomfortable at movie scenes too but not nearly as bad, but still there. It doesn't help that lots of porn sites ESPECIALLY PORN HUB knowingly have CP on their sites or other really really gross stuff. People call me a prude or get all huffy when I try to explain how my reaction to it is like "ew ew ew please stop." I hate it .. | ptsd |
I ruin roughly 85% of family functions or holidays. Today was more of the same. Ended well when we got home and were arguing, it escalated to me punching myself in the face, unfortunately not hard enough to knock anything into place because Im still crazy and still an asshole. Yay | depression |
so i have an issue where i get this compulsion to tap the front of my teeth, with my bottom teeth, i keep doing it, and i have an image in my head, which is an intrusive thought that im gonna accidentally pull my teeth out or chip my tooth. i need to stop doing it, cause it bugs me, i used to do it years ago aswell but i stopped for the longest time. so if i cant stop doing that why wouldn't i jump off a building or fufil any of my harm ocd thoughts. i hate this. | OCD |
I'm a college student so I don't really need to hold one down for now but I haven't had a job for more than three months of my life. I'm twenty one and I'll have jobs, I'll start and I'll learn and I'll do my best for weeks and weeks, and then...I stop caring. I look for a new job. Does it pay better? Sometimes! Does it have better hours? Not always! But it's something new and interesting! It's new things to learn!
I barely, if ever, choose a job with the same skillset as jobs I've had before. In the past year I've been a cashier, a prep cook, a tour guide, a barista, and I was just hired on to be an equipment attendant at a gym. The longest lasting position took three months of my time.
I'm terrified of when I'll graduate. I don't want to hop around jobs every few months for the rest of my life, that's stressful and terrifying, but my impulse, job after job, handful of months after handful of months, is to ditch what I'm doing and learn something new.
Anyone have any strategies as far as sticking to a job goes? Or is this not a problem? | ADHD |
How does your ADHD affect your experience with owning pets?
For example when I was younger I had a hamster. But I had to feed the hamster once every two days and I could never remember to feed the poor thing. Once every two days is something that just doesn't work for my brain.
I love cats and dogs but having an animal in your personal space, walking through your house, just seems very stressful to me. On top of that having animalhair everywhere just seems horrifying to me. My minds becomes a mess when my house is not clean.
I also hate fast moving pets. Because their fast unpredictable movements scare the crap out of me and just make me feel exhausted. Even though I love the pets, the fast movements are just too much for me. (Same way I hate walking through a crowd as unpredictable movements always scare me.)
I do own a pet now. I have a betta who has his own fish tank. I find that this is a great pet for me as he has his own space. I never forget to feed him, because it is a daily activity, which makes it easier to remember. He doesn't move very quickly or unpredictably so he doesn't scare me at all. He always swims up to the glass when I enter the room. It is amazing to watch him explore every corner of the tank and swim through the plants. Having more plants in my room is relaxing as well. The only downside is that obviously I can't hug or pet him. | ADHD |
hi. feeling stressed out over my relationship with food. i feel like my fridge is dirty esp when it smells like food which basically contaminated everything in my fridge. i throw so much away because i’m scared of mold and botulism and spoilage but i know i’m being wasteful. i wish i could just order out every day. and i know restaurants are gross and def worse than the food at my house but still. i rather eat there since i don’t know what ingredients are going into it. but i cant afford to order out or to buy new groceries every day. i just wish i could never eat again. some days i’m less overwhelmed with it than others. today i’m starving but i don’t want to eat and i really cannot order out all day. so i just won’t eat. anyone else have this problem | OCD |
Hi all, I have had OCD behaviours for the last decade. Recently it’s been focussed on repetitive checking of my engagement ring. It’s constant anxiety thoughts that I’m seeing something wrong, damaged with the ring. My husband doesn’t care at all about the ring and it’s insured but I just can’t stop checking it. I keep taking it into the jewellers to get checked and they can’t see anything wrong with it. I am loosing sleep to checking and it’s impacting work as I can’t do my hours and keep up the checking. I am waiting on psychology input and can’t take most anti-depressants as I am also bipolar and they trigger episodes for me. Is there anything I can do in the meantime to quit the repetitious checking? Thanks in advance. | OCD |
I dont know what my ocd is all about.
I can make up scenarios about anything. Anything can be a trigger and i have no idea how to do ERP because i dont have a specific topic. A what if thought can pop up from nowhere and i accept it and let it be there etc but then another one comes up. If i try to do ERP on thoughts ive had it does not bother me much at all. Its like a never ending imagination of what ifs. Its all about existential things, religion, schizo. And if i get afraid i just accept it and and night i feel great but in the morning i feel anxious af. I write all my thoughts down so if anyone would like to read it.
My thoughts today can be different from tomorrow if i accept this thought. How do i recover? | OCD |
I'm a 19 year old man and my life had been stressful lately. Final exams, mother's illness, etc. I've been praying to God to help me/us everyday before going to sleep and this habit hasn't stopped since, even though virtually all of my problems are gone.
Everytime I do some little movement, like putting down a glass of water on the table, wash my hands, close the door, take off my slippers, I tend to repeat these movements 3 times (or if on the 3rd time I placed down the object not fully symmetrically, I do it 6 more times so it's 3x3). I've been having this habit for years at this point that I tell myself "if this doesn't go the way I want then this and this – not too good things – will happen". Back when I was in elementary school I don't recall that I had been this over-orderly boy who orders his books and pens on the table or anything, but since the covid lockdowns, I've developed these tendencies. It also happened to me that in one time in my life (a bit more than 4 years ago) we had a vacation with my family in the US and for some unkown reason I always had a really bad feeling/urge to trip my father on the ground. I've fortunately never done that but it was so terrible that I felt like this random movement would occur one time or another and I would push my father to the ground. I haven't felt this urge since but it was very scary back then.
I've only learned about OCD's symptoms (I hope it's the correct word for it) a few days ago and I've been worrying since then. I HATE it when people (mostly people with strong victim mentality) want to have some mental disorder so it makes them special and thus they come up with things like "I must be a psychopath because this behaviour is true to me". But now I truly feel like I might be in a similar situation. Since I'm sure there's a lot of people here who are more educated in this matter, I thought it would be wise to come here with my question. So what do you think? Is it possible that I have OCD? | OCD |
I was diagnosed with combined ADHD over this last summer and began taking Adderall XR. After a few small increases in the dosage, I had mentioned to my doctor that I would feel very fatigued around 3 pm, and that would also be around the time when I noticed feeling depressed on other days.
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Before being diagnosed, I had been getting treatment for Depression. I always felt tired after 2pm, especially if I did something out of the house. I would drink coffee around that time but still felt tired, sluggish and unmotivated. The caffeine would usually just make me slightly more awake with a tummy ache.
He asked if I would like to try a rapid-release pill for those slower days, and I said I would try it, but I can't shake this feeling and thought-cycle of "maybe I don't actually need the medication. Maybe I just feel tired because I wake up at 7." My family also expressed some doubts about my need for the rapid release pill and of ADHD overall.
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The XR has been amazing so far. I get so much more work done in the morning, and I focus more in my early classes.
I know that this is MY medical journey, but any tips for relaxing those nagging thoughts and knowing when more medication may actually be needed? | ADHD |
I’m having intrusive thoughts, I’m exhausted, I feel sick every day, and some other factors are playing into all of this. I cried so much last night and now im exhausted. I had really weird dreams as well that have left me with the same feeling as when I have nightmares. It’s only Tuesday and part of me is hoping I get sick so they send me home. | ptsd |
I have diagnosed OCD, but I am still trying to figure everything out (and overthinking my diagnosis/believing I made it up). I am having trouble distinguishing rituals/compulsions and just being superstitious. For example, I will think “this object needs to touch the table after I put it down, before the person I’m passing it to picks it up.” I think something bad will happen unless this happens. I know that typically rituals are something you alone are supposed to be in control of, but it feels the exact same. Another thing I can’t distinguish from superstition is, for example, any time I am having an amazing time, I need to accompany that moment with the most horrible thoughts, or I think something bad will happen (kind of like as to not jinx the moment). Finally, any time I am discussing something I am looking forward to, I have to say “unless one of us dies before then” to prevent one of us from actually dying before then. I really would not consider myself superstitious, but maybe I am and am just confusing OCD and a weird superstition. Any thoughts help, thank you! | OCD |
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