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Hi everyone! I wanted to make a post about this because I couldn't find one similar. I've been diagnosed with PTSD, comorbid depression/anxiety and DID (dissociative identity disorder) due to a myriad of isolated and repeated traumas in childhood. It was suggested in passing that a service dog would be of assistance to me.
In my country there's a program where you can apply to have your dog be registered and trained as a mind dog - not to be confused with an ESA. They are classified as assistance dogs as they are trained to complete tasks related to ones disability.
When my mental illness comes into conversation with my family, the response is often that I am melodramatic, overreacting, "not as bad as I make it out to be", etc.
Despite thousands of applications to workplaces and short-lived employment, holding down a job as been extremely hard for me as there are days I cannot leave the house, and some I cannot leave my bedroom. I have memory issues relating to PTSD and DID which have led to troubles in the workplace, with employers growing increasingly exasperated with my memory loss and treating me like I'm stupid (at times outright calling me stupid). My counsellor has said that should the financial need arise, I may need to find a job that can accommodate my disability, but the best option would be to apply for a disability support pension until I am able to work.
When I spoke about this to my family, they were kinda angry. They said I was lazy, didn't need it, etc. They've now slightly warmed to the idea, in that they aren't outright calling me a deadbeat for taking a break from working for treatment.
Early last year when the possibility of a service dog was brought up, they laughed and asked what for, saying I'd be taking a resource away from someone that needed it, etc.
I feel a little insecure in my needs, afraid that I'm weak or stupid and not as bad after all. I'm not too sure what to do. I don't want to be perceived as lazy or taking advantage of the system. Is it reasonable for me to pursue this?
Edit: Getting around to replying to all the comments! Sorry I'm slow!
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ptsd
|
I have a great life, engaged, have plenty of friends, not a bad family situation. Why do I feel the need to self harm. I’ve reached out for help and all I get is people saying lll feel better soon. I can’t get out of bed and I’m failing half my classes that aren’t even hard. I’m failing at my sport. It doesn’t make sense there’s no reason I should be even a little depressed but I can’t help it. I’m borderline thinking I’m better dead with how much I’m ruining my perfect situation. Does anyone know how to help.
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depression
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didnt get an answer last time so posting again.
im currently taking 10-20mg ritalin as needed but would like to try other meds (have already been on atomoxitine) so i have 3 questions.
what are the names of the other meds? brand or scientific name. I know aderall, ritalin,vyvanse
just from reading about others experiences aderall seems (on paper) like it could be a good fit for me but I cant get a straight answer on whether it is actually available in the UK. Is it?
and how should I ask, I fear coming across as seeking meds if I ask for it as I dont have much experience with talking to doctors and dont really understand how to go about it. what is the acceptable way to ask. right now ritalin is causing bad comedowns as well as random anxiety but is overall better than not being medicated so thats why id like to try other meds, should i just not look a gift horse in the mouth?
TL;DR: what are uk prescribed adhd meds names?
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ADHD
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I'm italian and I would really like to talk whit you
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OCD
|
I saw a tiktok that suggested that (possibly one of) the reason people like true crime and reading about atrocities is because their “normal” or comfort state is anxiety. I sort of get where that person was coming from, but I feel like personally I like true crime and it fulfills an emotional need for me to accept that 1) bad things happen to people who don’t deserve it and 2) it’s okay to have mixed feelings about the person.
For 1) I feel like I am much more sympathetic towards others, as opposed to myself. I will blame myself, but if someone else told me the same story I’d say “well fuck them, you’re incredible you didn’t deserve that” and so on. It’s easier for me to feel like an external person is “innocent”
For 2) I have very mixed feelings about my latest trigger, or trauma? It was someone I cared for deeply and I’m pursuing legal stuff due to the fact that I was not the only person they did stuff against. Just the latest (hopefully). This was someone I thought I loved. And knowing the full story I can’t believe that they genuinely loved me back, but rather that I was an easy young target, who eventually aged out of criminality.
What are your thoughts about true crime? Or horror? Do you like things that objectively may be triggering?
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ptsd
|
Do any of you guys feel like the masks you wear to blend into society simultaneously makes you feel like you ARE an imposter and not just feel that you are?
I served successfully in the military. My record is unremarkable, but I got my honorable discharge with no judicial punishment on my record and with full benefits. I have my bachelor’s degree and I’m working on my master’s currently and I have a 3.9 GPA.
All of this, though, was able to be pulled off because of the many “person suits” I wear and have worn and the social algorithms I have adopted just to be able to scrape by socially.
I feel like I’m not a real person. That my successes are not my own. That my progress is all built on a lie that I try and fail again and again to convince myself is the truth.
I don’t know how to handle or process this feeling or if it’s even real. I have a very hard time discerning success or progress from outright lies or deception.
I wish I could be accepted for who I am.
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aspergers
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So I looked down and looked at the part of my friends skirt that was open you know the front part but I did it purposefully
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OCD
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like the new username? it's bleak and unoriginal
i'm (35m) unhappy and have been for as long as i can remember.
i set goals and give up on them, i don't really have any hobbies or interests, no real friends, etc
i'm terribly uncomfortable talking to most people and especially the opposite sex. i really don't feel like i have anything to say and i'm not so sure i'm interested in hearing what others have to say either.
people tell me i should get a dog, pretty sure that's just their way of telling me to shut up.
or maybe that they agree that i'm not going to find the acceptance that i'm seeking from other humans
i feel so inadequate all the time. i almost always look at other guys as competition, why would anyone want to be with me when they could be with one of them instead? etc
as far as looks go, i'm average at best but the situation probably isn't hopeless. i have some nice facial features that could do a lot more for me if i would just develop my body a bit,
but it's not going to happen. i'm supposed to be working out right now but i'm doing this instead.
even if i do work out right now, it's not going to make a difference unless i keep doing it consistently forever and ever and i just won't
but what i'm trying to say is that i'm not much of a ladies man and don't see that changing
i used to draw a lot or whatever. they weren't bad, i made little comics and cartoons and things and i think people were genuinely impressed by some of them.
that was supposed to be my thing.
but do you have any idea how hard it is to sit down and do a thing? it just feels like work and i obviously don't enjoy working
it doesn't seem like my problems can be solved without medication, all of which have shitty side effects that would only create new problems anyway and i just don't see any way through this
i'm in love with someone. we dated briefly and it was pretty bad. they themselves are no prize, a hopeless drug addict and not a very caring person overall.
this person makes me feel used and never acknowledges my feelings. i try to cut them out but months go by and sooner or later i end up feeling so low that even talking to them again seems like all upside from where i'm at. this has gone on for a few years now
i'm doing better financially than i ever have. but i don't like my job, most of the people i'm surrounded by, or the amount of hours i work in a week to sustain it all.
i have nicer things now than i ever thought i'd have but it doesn't really change how i feel. i also don't want to downgrade my lifestyle for some reason
i'd like to share my life with someone. the problem is i'm too insecure to even let that happen, even if anyone wanted to share a life with me.
i actually compete with the women that i date and feel threatened by their own successes, it's really pathetic. you could describe me as a fuckboy and i wouldn't be able to defend myself
this doesn't happen very often anyway because i am mostly alone
i'm also concerned that if i fell in love with someone, i might get bored and fall out of love and disappoint them. maybe life is just boring
i recently hooked up with a 22-year-old. she seemed to enjoy the sex and my company.
she is very nice and kind of cute, though truthfully, i'm so superficial that i wouldn't even brag about her or want to introduce her to anyone i know.
she's also a little too enthusiastic and, honestly, kind of annoying
i'm pretty sure that if i met someone that i thought was really cool, it wouldn't matter if they were really pretty or just "kind of cute," but that's not the case with this girl either way
when the sex is over, i just want to be alone again. this isn't a new thing for me
obviously, i'm not a very good guy or anything. but i honestly don't think i'm that bad, either. i'm mostly just weak, and weakness can bring out the worst in people, i think
i just don't know what to do about any of these feelings or the hopelessness of my situation. i think about suicide all the time but honestly do not consider myself to be suicidal.
as afraid as i am of my life never changing and just getting worse as i continue to age, i'm also very afraid of dying. maybe this will change as the situation worsens, but we're not there yet
i just want someone to talk to about all this, but i want the conversation to be different from the ones i've had in the past. i don't know what i want really
thanks for reading\~
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depression
|
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDE\_0iTCGV0](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDE_0iTCGV0)
just me being depressed and trying to get things off my mind. Took the opportunity to post it and put in my calendar to come back to it in 3-5 years. If I'm still around lmao but still
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depression
|
No not because of anything weird but with every single interaction if I open up at all the only thing i get is judgment or that 'lets change the subject and avoid real feelings and a million people telling me a million ways I shouldn't feel like i do. What nobody says is 'you matter and you are cared about'
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aspergers
|
at least used to when i’d cry id feel a sense of relief, and i’d sleep so well. it was cleansing. i don’t even get that anymore. i hate everything i ever used to love. i don’t understand the things i use to find enjoyment in. im trapped in a miserable life, sure i could take a risk and try to get myself into a better situation, but everything i do is one step forward two steps back. tried to get help over a month ago. still waiting. it doesn’t feel like therapy would even work but wtf does that matter when they’re too busy anyway. i never have a moment to myself but can’t afford to live alone. i don’t wanna hurt my family by really doing it but killing myself is the only thought that gives me peace of mind. i’ve had a miserable, hard life. i’ve tried this whole shitty life to make it better or find happiness and it has never worked. right now i don’t have a way out of it so i just rot away. sometimes i feel it would’ve been kinder to leave before my family had to watch me get to this point. what do i even do at this point?
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depression
|
Hi everyone, I really searched on the internet about what I feel and im surprised that what I feel is a mental illness which is the OCD, I've searched groups and communities to find people who also experience the same thing and im shocked that numerous people are experiencing it.
Recently I felt tired about everything the intrusive thoughts and the compulsions I do, tbh almost all of the symptoms of OCD are in me, I've realized that what ever thoughts come in to my mind is that I don't have any control in the future, nor change the past, what I have control now is the present. There's so much time I've wasted because of entertaining my intrusive thoughts and it really affects my life, recently I've decided to let my intrusive thoughts pass even the worst one because im just torturing myself, doing weird stuffs, thinking it wouldn't happen if i do it. I know that it's not really easy just to say Im going to stop it but the only person who can help you right now is your self,so stop worrying about things especially to those you can't control and remember that everything happens for a reason. I hope that you'll find the way to manage to at least gradually stop your OCD, God bless us all.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7).
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OCD
|
I have two part-time jobs which only require 2-3 total days of work per week (editing audio for podcasts).
I'm working on a video game that's taken about a year to finish, and it's almost done.
I'm a writer and I've written a couple books that I need to publish soon (I self publish my books).
I make music and I started an album, and even commissioned album art from an artist-friend.
I recently signed up to volunteer for an organization that I casually take part in, and they've been giving me lots of volunteer work.
I recently started interviewing people for a podcast that I'm starting.
I love to read and I have many books that I want to get to.
----
SO I always prioritize my paid work, and nothing's getting in the way of that,
I'm almost finished the video game and that should be out of the way soon, so I can publish my two unpublished books.
I completely put the music aside for now.
I haven't edited the interviews I recorded for the new podcast. I need to get to that but I don't have the time.
I put reading aside for now, except for a little bit in the mornings and/or evenings.
But the volunteer work might have been a mistake. I've been doing graphic design, and it's fun, but there's another wing of the organization that I agreed to do work for. They want to meet me this weekend. I'm feeling stressed and it's not fun anymore.
I love having all these things going on, so I always have something to work on. And I need to make more money, so it's important to be active and productive and make connections.
But I think I have to lay off the volunteer work. I think I have to step back from the extra wing/department of the volunteer group. I feel bad about doing it, but I'm swamped with work. It's been non-stop for weeks now and I'm gonna wear myself out.
---
Does anybody else have a tendency to do this?
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aspergers
|
So for context. I served a deployment in Afghanistan, and I immediately went to my local mental health clinic when I noticed everything was different, and I was miserable and borderline suicidal. My therapist pretty much flat out told me the diagnosis, and gave me a talk about the different therapy options regarding PTSD. I am scared, and extremely sad. I don't know where to begin with this, and I don't know where go from here. What can I expect moving forward, and does this ever get better?
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ptsd
|
In stark contrast to the 18173638 videos out there telling you the blue light from phones stops you from going to sleep, I totally can't sleep at all without it.
If I don't have my phone and a few videos to watch then I just stare at the cieling for hours - and I mean hours. Then the anxiety kicks in cos it's 4am and I have to be up with the kids in 3 hours.
If I stick my phone on, I can be asleep in 20 minutes.
Anyone else? How do you deal with it?
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ADHD
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God iam 24 and I just think that my childhood memories are coming back to life but with being an adult , seeing myself sensitive as always and morals and ethics which are not good that haven't changed throughout years, idk if this is the right place to post this but can that be inattentive ADD? I really answers cause if not idk my life gonna be hell
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ADHD
|
This is my first time making a post so sorry if i screw up the formatting or anything.
Anyways, I’m 17, a senior in high school, and have pretty bad diagnosed inattentive adhd. I just got it diagnosed last year. I’ve always been really bad at school, my grades ranging from As to Ds. Usually, the higher grades are, of course, what I have interest in (english, art, etc) while the lower grades are subjects I can’t be bothered to care about (math, science, etc). My biggest struggle is executive dysfunction, so I struggle to complete work outside of school to the point where sometimes I am not completing any homework at all. It also gets to the point where my inschool work doesn’t get done either, I tend to burn out and give up.
I’ve always had this idea that college is where things would get better for me because I could narrow down my education to pursue subjects I actually have interest in, and that this will increase my diligence to get work done. However, I have strong doubts. I always hear that college is much harder than high school and much more work. I’ve been living in this pattern for so long I don’t know if I will ever be successful in an academic setting.
I have aspirations to pursue either art or writing. As of right now I am planning to go to community college and then go from there. I don’t want to disappoint my parents and not go to college and I also want a stable job to support myself.
Am I wasting my time and money? Is there any way I could succeed in this type of environment? Should I go a different route?
I know only I can answer these questions, but I just need opinions or advice or guidance from people who know what it’s like to live with ADHD. Even hearing about y’all’s experiences would help.
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ADHD
|
I’m not too sure if I’m “depressed” but what I do know is all the posts in this thread strikes a chord with me and i feel a similar pain. I simply hate the way I look and feel daily, 24/7 I have thoughts about being ugly and how I have zero worth because of that fact. As expected I’ve never had a relationship, talked to a girl or anything, but I don’t even know how I can properly love someone when I don’t love myself. I literally matched with this chick on tinder and in my head I just kept constantly thinking she swiped right on accident because i felt like I’m just that undesirable that no relatively attractive person would even look my way. And my initial depressive thoughts weren’t always here, I use to be so happy and have so much confidence but now I feel like a fool if I open my mouth and talk to a girl. This self hate has even had me questioning my character as a whole, whether it pertains to friendships or me liking a girl. I just feel like I’am annoying and a bother and that nobody likes me as a person. This leads me to delete my social media accounts frequently bc I feel as if I’ll just b better off if i was off the grid. It’s just scary to me how all this negative feelings have materialized into what it is now. It’s started off with me thinking i was unattractive, to me thinking the world would be essentially better without me. I don’t feel suicidal but,I feel like I wish I was alone of in the middle of nowhere in small town with no wife and no kids, and since I wouldn’t see other people’s families i wouldn’t feel like i need a family of my own. I feel like I’m in the early stages of a serious illness of self hate that has gotten worse progressively. I literally one day was driving, may I add IVE NEVER cried about anything in specific when it comes to feeling sad in general but one day i thought to myself I don’t want ANYTHING on this earth besides happiness, and I’m willing to give up what I need to for that. I don’t care about how much money I make, how many friends I have or how many girls like me all i want is to wake up and not hate myself.
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depression
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I just kept waking up in a cold sweat. I just woke up remembering I had dreamed about my abuser. I know they were triggered by high stress but they were terrifying and I cant stop thinking about them. I feel so weak and vulnerable and i absolutely hate it
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ptsd
|
Hye, 23M from Southeast Asia. I'm studying in a degree and will be graduating next year. I've dropped out from a STEM degree before because I got really depressed. And now I feel regret about it. Should I take back the course in the future? Because I'll be graduating soon, now Im afraid to have these responsibilities as an adult thrown at me. I don't feel like I'm ready yet. And I want everything to stay as it is. Like right now. I don't want to see my parents grow old and me leaving the house. I don't want to. I don't really looking forward to grow. I feel like I couldn't get the chance to be able to try things if I get older. I've always dreamt that before 25, my life would already be set. Job, money, house, already fluent in a few languages and a young engineer. Now it all gone to ashes. Thoughts?
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depression
|
I recently switched medications from Sertraline to Luvox (can’t spell the generic). I really hope this helps. I hear it does a lot better than Zoloft in the treatment of OCD, and although it has helped my depression and anxietyI felt like it made compulsions worse for me. It started to interfere with my work. I’ve been on the other for off and on about 8 years, and because symptoms have been worse, I felt like it was time for a change. If I remember I’ll let you guys know in the upcoming weeks or months how it’s helping me. Glad I can share with some like minded (bothered) individuals.
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OCD
|
I know this is an issue I have, so I ask a ton of follow up questions, which also annoys people and they assume I’m unintelligent or just annoying. But then often the instructions seem like they’re obvious and complete so I don’t know I need to ask clarifying questions!
It’s just so gutting when I do as I’m asked over and over and over, yet I’m always going to be the wrong one. Always.
Example:
supervisor: we can’t do this with this product anymore, and have to use the product we already did this with.”
My brain: ok, so we clearly need to use this product that we did the thing with, no matter what. Clear enough, no need to ask a question
\*uses product at first opportunity a couple of days later. It looks off, but I HAVE TO use it\*
Supervisor: that product is off, why did you use it and why wasn’t I checked with when it looked off?
Me: …Because I….????? I thought we had to use it?
Supervisor: no, I said we have to use it the next day if we do that thing to the product
Me: \*dies inside because those words were never spoken in that way and I thought I was doing the right thing FFFFFFFFFFF\* \*internalizing their disappointment only to grow even harder on myself \*
​
TL:dr - I do what I’m literally told because I can’t interpret unspoken meaning that people (supervisors) assume I can, and I’m always the person in the wrong. it’s exhausting & disheartening
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ADHD
|
Okay, so I have a new job away from the jail where I’m working part-time.
I’ve been there four months but I’ve been having panic attacks here and there and have been needing to call in; I’ve called in about three times prior to today.
So, I saw a bunch of prison guards come into this place where I work, including my former lieutenant.
I broke down, had a panic attack, and left for the day; this is my fourth absence.
I don’t know, I feel like no one really anywhere really understands what I’m going through.
I have these flashbacks to being at the jail that are incredibly vivid—of the worst things I’ve ever seen: attempted suicides, attempted murders, my brother being beat up, addicts, etc.
I’m worried I will lose my job because of my PTSD and my panic attacks.
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ptsd
|
So, as the topic title mentions, I was riding a really awesome wave of relief from my POCD for a couple of months. Any triggering thoughts were fought off with swift rationalization, and it felt amazing. I was so proud of myself.
The past couple of days, have been quite difficult, though. I do my best, to fight it off on my own, but at this point, I need some support.
So, I’m sure everyone has their own array of weaponry to help combat their type of OCD, and the many thoughts and reactions, it tends to bring with it.
Besides, rationalizing the situation, one of the things I would say to myself, whenever, I would see a kid or teenager, in person, or on tv, or whatever, was either: “aw, they’re cute, which would be quickly followed by a “but not until they’re 18”. or I would just simply state the latter in my head on its own, whenever, I would see a kid and get uncomfortable or anxious.
It never really bothered me because, I knew it was just a silly thing to say to assuage myself, but for some reason, the thought that it just sounds really gross, popped into my head and hasn’t left. Like the OCD, has latched on even harder, and is making me feel like I mean what I’m saying when I say that. Like, I’m actually wanting to do something with said kid, but I’m fighting it off until they’re 18. Logically, I know that’s not the case, but those butterflies you get when you start to doubt yourself, are intense. They make me feel like I’m hiding something or am lying to myself. I would get the same ones, before I came out, so I cringe real hard, when I get an intrusive thought, and get those same butterflies. I know the butterflies, I’m getting now are more likely coming from shame and embarrassment, but still, they make me very uncomfortable.
Does anyone think it's weird/gross? Like, I know why I'm saying it, but it makes me so uneasy. Any advice? Anyone else can relate? Any one else have any mantras or sayings they don’t mind sharing, that help ease with their OCD thoughts and anxiety?
So many thanks in advance, and I would really appreciate any help!
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OCD
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Joji - Ballads 1
I've always loved this album. It's literally the definition of what I perceive to be a perfect album.
Has anyone else heard this album before?
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aspergers
|
Does anyone else get that feeling when excitement bubbles up in your chest and comes out your throat. I’m not sure if it’s an ADHD inability to control emotions thing. But even as an adult, i get an overwhelming excitement which can come on almost at random, which kind of explodes out my chest. Its a great feeling but its also weird. Being excited is normal, and i can be excited without that feeling, but sometimes its like an explosion that comes out kind of like a laugh or a shout. Could be just a human thing, not specifically ADHD. Anyway, thanks for reading
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ADHD
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Is there anyone out there, anywhere that will take a phone call or IM that will help during a trigger? I am triggered by a very close source and just need to work through it, like a panic attack. I just need someone to talk to, but I am lost finding anyone. I just get “let’s make an appointment”. Bah. I am stressed about this.
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ptsd
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Today it was 134/105.
The stress of being on the spectrum is KILLING ME! The lack of supports, fighting the system, being misunderstood all the time
At the rate I’m going, I’m going to have a full stroke or aneurysm
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aspergers
|
Hi everyone! Fellow depressed person here. I found myself doing a bit better on some new medication, but lately I can feel my seasonal depression kicking in and I don’t know how to kick it to the curb. I’ve been feeling very “bored” lately and I find no joy in doing the activities that usually help me out of an episode. Can y’all suggest any activities or hobbies that help you when you don’t feel like doing much of anything? I hope you all are well!
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depression
|
Well, ex best friend now. I’ve [posted about the incident before ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AbuseInterrupted/comments/clhqf8/trying_to_talk/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) and shared what happened with this particular friend before they started dating.
I remained tentative “friends” with my molester because I was afraid of retribution if I cut her off. I told this friend about everything that happened, and she listened and at the time looked horrified.
Fast forward a few months and I am no longer friends with my molester due to a different falling out. My best friend begins dating her and I think nothing of it. It’s just now hitting me though, all the feelings of hurt and betrayal. I feel like another person in my life just cast me aside. I thought that was over but I guess I was wrong.
I can’t sleep. I’ve been painting my walls and carving wood because I’m terrified of waking up. I’m terrified of facing another day and facing my own mind. Just maybe if I stay awake alone through the night things will be okay. I can’t move from my bed without panicking. I don’t know what to do, I feel like I’m going crazy. I know it’s just the PTSD talking but I can’t stop.
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ptsd
|
Hi all.
I’ve been struggling with ROCD for over a year. I’m 6 weeks into Zoloft. These meds have helped a lot but I decided to start self-directed ERP today as I don’t think the meds will get me to the finish line.
I was doing really well facing my fears. The anxiety had calmed down but now I feel anxious and obsessing about my relationship more than ever. Is this normal and how long until I see results? I am planning to commit an hour a day to this because I need my life back!!!!
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OCD
|
does anyone else feel cursed? I'm not even religious but I don't think it's possible to have this bad of a life without any reason... id give anything so itd stop
|
OCD
|
I think most of my interests are pretty normal for someone my age (18); girls, etc that sort of thing, though not really a hobby admittedly! I haven't really ever had any kind of "special" autistic interests often associated with aspergic people. When I was really young, I had an interest in pylons and also garbage trucks. Today, although it is an interest I never really share because it is peculiar, I take an interest in road signs. I often save pictures of them, or make my own on my PC. I have an interest in roads in general, long before I got my driving license. They have fascinated me for some time. I can probably talk about every section of the British equivelant of a freeway/highway near me. Also, I have an interest in meterology, or more specifically, daily tempreatures of cities. For a while, I would literally collect information on the climate data of loads of cities, comparing them on Google, and trying to establish tempreature anomalies. I think for a while this was because of "eco anxiety", a new phenonema . This was pre covid , now most of my attention is on that or dealing with the day to day tribulations of depression and aspergers.
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aspergers
|
Life has been pretty rough for me got diagnosed with adhd at the age of 24 (male) which is also my current age .I grew up in India where it was comman practice to physically abuse and chastise kids in school and home , so for a person like me who got bad grade and had incomplete homework life has been pretty hard.To make things worse I was also bullied in school.Im having a hard time now cause I am afraid that my future would be just as miserable as my past ,it feels like it's going to be filled failure and that is why I am suicidal .Just wanna put an end to my misery. I'm also on the medication atomoxitine (straterra in USA) . The RSD has also made it difficult for me to attend job interviews and I'm also having a difficult time choosing a career. Need help wanna know how to make my life better
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ADHD
|
So my psychologist gave me a diagnosis of mild depression (which I definitely do not have) and mild anxiety (therapy of nearly a year has helped a ton) after my evaluation I did 2 months ago. She said maybe I just have bad habits, because I definitely "have the brain power" and my IQ is supposedly decent. She referenced my high school GPA but doesn't care that I was literally studying 2x as much as my peers because I learned everything more slowly, but she said my processing speed is fast. She says I wouldn't have my current job if I had issues. She said my prior OCD diagnosis from another psychiatrist probably isn't accurate - and that I agree with. For now, she said she'll have me fill out additional surveys and maybe those will show something.
So now I'm just frustrated and sad and don't even know whether to cancel my appointment with my psychiatrist next week (like, $100 per appointment) because I don't plan on taking antidepressants or anti-anxiety medication. Maybe I'll wait another few months to see if the additional surveys show something, but it's been frustratingly long. Maybe I do have bad habits from middle school that never went away and just got worse as I got more overwhelmed. I've changed jobs, boyfriends, cities (haven't unpacked my suitcases from 3 weeks ago), EVERYTHING in the past few years thinking my struggles were external. I took Straterra for 3 weeks in March, and it helped a lot. I could finally watch a single TV episode. But it made me exhausted (16 hour sleep), really bad headaches (this was the biggest issue), numbed my emotions, and gave me stomach issues and was already out of my price range ($90 a month), which is why I wanted to try something else.
Like I get I can't blame it all on ADHD even if I did have it. I have to take responsibility. I just thought the process would be easier with medication. I've been trying to see psychiatrists since February when my therapist recommended it for the second time. I'm just so tired.
I'm 23, F, grew up lower middle class, went to an "elite" private school but changed majors 4 times with a below average GPA, have been working on Wall Street for a few years, grew up in a non traumatic but conservative ethnic minority household and Ive been doing this whole mental health BS behind my parents back since I stayed with them for Covid. Is life just supposed to be this hard? I'm not trying to pass school exams or get good grades, the only goal is for life to actually be manageable and maybe read a damn book once in a while. Maybe I am just really bad at being normal.
I just want a hug.
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ADHD
|
I have read in several reputable medical websites and in a couple of scientific articles that combining ADHD medication with caffeine can indeed have synergistic or additive effects.
Unfortunately, none of these articles (not even the scientific peer-reviewed articles) have provided a reference for this.
So, is anybody familiar with research studying the effects of combining ADHD medication with caffeine?
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ADHD
|
I'm having a horrible family emergency, which has made concentration like pushing a boulder up a hill. I have to split things between school, family emergency, and trying to plan how to deal...for the most part, everyone has been very responsive except for one professor...who has always been kinda weird about my accommodations:
* through my school services, i requested accommodations, and before the semester starts, she requests to talk on the phone b/c she needs clarification. she told me to be communicative b/c she's new to this and she's gotten in trouble before. she also asked another professor this quarter...if she got a student with accommodations.
* \*on top of my family emergency, my accommodations allow me to ask for a extra days--she said she could try, but it was like pulling teeth, and that she wanted to be **fair to all my classmates**
* she recently sent out an e-mail saying, hey if you need help, I'm flexible since I already gave two students accommodations. It felt like an outing almost.
Not accomd. related, but as I was trying to talk to people setting up to present, I kept asking how they'd prefer we sat. She snapped at me, "are you presenting today?" "no (of course you know that tho)" and she said "then let them set up!"
I don't know what to do...I keep obsessing about it. I also want to file a complaint with my DRS, especially if it happened before...but also feel bad doing that. Just looking for some support/help/anyone felt like this?
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ADHD
|
So, after bar hopping and going from frat house to frat house, inevitably ending up blackout drunk (the both of us) at my apartment somehow, he began to mention his past in the army. Needless to say, this poor motherfucker has seen things I’d wish would weigh on no mans shoulders.
While I’ve experienced quite the life of my own, I ain’t ever been in shoes like his. We haven’t spoke of this since that night, but idk what to do. I care about my friends and to know he bottles that shit up bothers the fuck out of me.
Advice?
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ptsd
|
Cw:sh
I don't know where else to go but here for advice or help or to vent or whatever with this so hello, I'll start with background I guess
I'm 17 in a month and going into my senior year of highschool, I have a little brother who is 13 and who I love very much
When I started middle school I started self harming as a means of emotional regulation and continued on and off until about 6 months ago and I've been caught and yelled at many times over the years for it traumatizing my family
My mom told me a few days ago as a result I've given my brother PTSD and the next night he was having a panic attack about it and he has started wearing bandages around his arm as a part of therapy for it
I feel terrible, I didn't want to do this and I know I can't change what happened and I haven't done it and wont do it again but I just want to help I know I fucked up I just want to fix it
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ptsd
|
Hey guys! I had this problem for two years already and I could say that I have developed a lot of things that could help me deal with the intrusive thoughts by myself. And I think I’ve been quite better handling it internally.
However externally. (what other people think of me) There’s just this problem that makes me sick to the gut. It’s when I get paranoid and think that people know that I am dealing with this. Sometimes friends would kid and banter to me that I’m into kids or they would subtly make paedo jokes with me. And I freeze, I dismiss the topic and I avoid it. Basically it becomes a touchy subject to me. And I’m scared that because of my initial responses they sort of got the hint that I am one. I just need help cause i secretly think everyone knows that I’m dealing with this. And I feel so much shame and fear and its making me sick. What could be the right response whenever people do that kind of thing, should I just ride their jokes or what? I just need advice. I feel like I don’t know how to react when surprise situations like those come up.
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OCD
|
It's getting cold where I live and my sister lives in an even colder place. Today all of a sudden a plan was made to go meet her. In true ADHD fashion I left packing for the last minute, but I made a list and kept to it(or at least tried my best).
One of the most important things on that list was to pack my sister's boots and jacket (that she's been asking for since a week)- it's getting super cold where she is. They didn't fit in my tiny suitcase and so that I didn't forget them I kept them right ON my shoes so that I could not miss it at all. For some reason I get super anxious when I have to catch a taxi or something. So when the taxi came I literally put the bag that contained boots and jacket out of the way, wore my shoes and went off!
Now I'm about 3hrs away from my house and can't go back. I called my sister to let her know and she says that it's okay but she was obviously pissed.
Although I'll ask someone from home to courier it to her, it's these little things that get to me, I really feel like crying right now.
How do you tackle this?
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ADHD
|
I'm a photographer and love my job, being my own boss working in the creative industry I feel was a match made in heaven for someone with ADHD, except the admin side sucked big time. I got diagnosed 1.5 years ago and meds helped immensely with the nitty gritty side of things.
However the past couple of months I've started to experience what I assume is emotion blunting, I'm feeling less inspired by the creative side of my business and work, I don't have much of an emotional attachment to clients like I used to and it almost makes me feel like I don't love my job anymore which does worry me because I have no plan B lol.
Issue is I love my meds (dex) for getting stuff done but also I like the emotional blunting for things like dating/relationships but RSD really affected me prior to meds. I exercise daily, sleep 8 hours and eat well/drink water so I don't see much difference to the blunting
Has anyone been through anything similar? Is there any way to reduce the blunting?
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ADHD
|
It really kills me when I hear people saying “it’s my OCD” when they mean “I’m obsessive about cleanliness.” OCD can certainly manifest as a tendency toward militant organization, but that’s not a critical diagnostic element. I’m personally not very organized or very clean, and it’s hard to make people understand that I have very real obsessions and compulsions. Yes, my house is a mess, but you know that my light switches are all being turned on and off 48 times every night - even if I can’t bring myself to clean up. It’s just frustrating to feel like people 1. Reduce this exhausting disorder to “cleanliness” and 2. Assume that I am unaffected because I’m not organized. Anyone else OCD but not super into cleanliness?
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OCD
|
So I just recently turned 18 and decided to move in with my best friend of 8 years. But my grandma doesn't technically know I moved out. I went through a lot of stuff during my childhood, taken from my mom and placed with my grandma. I went through the foster care system and was severely abused for no reason. Then whenever my grandma got me back I went through abuse from my own family, and no one ever stood up for me. Not even my grandma. But she always goes on about how she loves me so much. After I go diagnosed she immediately went to the social security office to get me a check and started taking advantage of my money. I didn't even figure out it was my money until I was 17. So I took the credit card the check goes to and I left with my best friend, but I told her I was only staying for a month or two. I'm terrible at confrontation, and my grandma knows how to guilt trip expertly. How do I even go about telling her I'm not coming back?
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aspergers
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People always told me that i have a "funny" voice. Apparently monotone voice it's a Asperger trait but I'm not sure what they mean by that or if it's related with what I'm saying.
Quite frustrating as a male that I don't own a masculine voice.
Does you have a similar experience related to your voice?
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aspergers
|
For the past year and a half I have had a problem with doing stuff over and over again just to “make sure” such as opening and closing the fridge 10+ times then pressing on the fridge door for around 5 minutes, pressing down on the tap for around 5 minutes and coming to make sure it’s off every 2 minutes for about 20 minutes, checking my social media to make sure I’ve not posted anything knowing full well I haven’t. Sounds like ocd not sure, all’s started when I got knocked out from hitting my head on a tree, please give opinions etc.
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OCD
|
2001 (Virtual) International Conference on ADHD General Public Presentations on 11/5 and 11/6 You must Register
Same Great Conference, Online AgainLast year's online conference showed us the importance of making all of this great information about ADHD easy to access. This is especially true in times of uncertainty where it's hard to plan almost a year out. So we will be back online this year, but with an easier, more user-friendly platform.There will still be all the best speakers and exhibitors and you will have plenty of opportunities to interact with them and your fellow attendees. Plus, all the support groups, a talent show, and more active events. So, whatever you're looking for, you will find it here.You can watch the presentations live and ask your questions, as well as participate in the various discussion groups and other interactive activities. Or if the timing doesn't work out, you can watch almost everything afterwards for two weeks--including those sessions that you missed because you couldn't figure out how to be in two places at the same time.The logistics are much easier with an online conference, so we're hoping that some folks can attend this year who would not have been able to travel to an in-person event. There's always more to learn with ADHD and our goal is to share that important information that makes people's lives better.There will be doing two presentations with Melissa Orlov. One will be for clinicians on helping couples navigate boundary issues and one for the general public on how to deal with resistance to change.Thursday's sessions in the ADHD Professionals Institute are for service providers, so get your continuing ed credits here! The general conference (for everyone) officially begins with Thursday night's keynote, but there are some sessions for the general public scattered throughout Thursday. Then all sorts of sessions and events run all day Friday and Saturday.You won't want to miss this! As always, please pass it on to anyone who may be interested.You can get all the details here. -> https://events.bizzabo.com/321577/home[link: ](https://events.bizzabo.com/321577/home)
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ADHD
|
To give you some background. I had an intrusive thought 6-7 months ago while I was high about harming my parents. It scared me so much that I immediately sat down and went into a shitty mood the whole rest of the night. I knew that the next day after that I was going to be miserable since I thought that. I was miserable for a while until eventually it seemed to dissipate. Then I saw some interview on Instagram of some guy asking a serial killer some questions. That’s when it flared up again because I thought “what if that could be me?” and part of me felt bad for the guy because it seemed like he felt bad and couldn’t help it, but I knew that he was a monster and I felt disgusted that I felt any kind of emotion towards him. But then the harm OCD dissipated once I started to question my sexuality. Then the harm OCD came back and the sexuality thing went away and I don’t know. It’s a big cluster fuck. I eventually felt so bad and felt so much guilt that I spilled everything out to my parents and eventually found my way onto Zoloft. I’m taking that and seeing a therapist. However, ever since I’ve started Zoloft I’ve felt weird. I’ve been on it a little over a week now and I seem to be reacting less to these thoughts and urges and it’s concerning me because it feels like I may want this stuff, which really scares me. That was a fear I had before taking the medication. What if I’m making this OCD shit up and the medication makes me a monster. It’s almost as if I want the negativity and miserableness associated with the thoughts to stay. I do not want to be evil nor do I want to be a bad person. I’ve exhibited some narcissistic behavior before and I am now self aware of that and I’m trying to stop it. I realize it’s wrong and I feel bad about that too. Can someone confirm if this is all just anxiety and OCD or if I am really some monster?
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OCD
|
Heyo Reddit. I'm a 911 dispatcher but shortly before I finished my final training I discovered that answering 911 calls can trigger flashbacks and PTSD episodes. Because my center was short they allowed me to stay even though I felt I had reason enough to quit due to the new diagnosis. Here I am now four months into my two week notice. I only work radio dispatching but I have been praised by all of my units that I'm a damn good dispatcher. I can remain calm and collected when everyone else is losing it. But immediately afterwards I'll be sick to my stomach or I'll have depression episodes that last for a week. I was thinking about going back to be a teacher but COVID has made that difficult at the moment. Any advice?
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ptsd
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...because of my depression.
I (f23) live alone and have no one to help me when my depression gets really bad, so my place is a disaster.
I'll spare the details for now because I'm personally ashamed of it, but if you're going through the same thing then maybe you understand. It's not the "I haven't cleaned my house in a few days or a week" typa thing :)
I wanna know I'm not the only one 😢 and what tips can you guys give about getting at least a few things done + how not to beat yourself up about it too much.
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depression
|
Hi Everyone!!
As a person with ADHD, when you go to a website, what is it that turns you off and makes you leave? For me it's when a website is too slow. I'm really impatient.
I am making a website and I want to make sure it's accessible to people with ADHD in every way I can. So, any suggestions and advice would be SO AMAZING! Thank you!!
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ADHD
|
Does anyone else’s OCD come in the form of anger and aggressiveness ? Right now I’m angry and I don’t know why, and because of that I feel aggressive, I’m getting intrusive thoughts, images and urges to stab my parents or pets bc of the anger. this also makes me anxious, it feels like I’m actually gonna act out, but at the same time I’m also not bothered by this right now, probably because I’m at school and not near any knives. But when I’m at home I’m more anxious and worried about this.
I keep getting thoughts saying “just act on it already” or “if you act on it, it’ll be over” or “stab them to get rid of your anger” or “you won’t regret doing it, you’ll feel good about it” or “you want to, it’s so easy to do so just do it”
I feel like I’m starting to believe the thoughts, what do I do :/
I just feel like giving up, but I also wanna recover. But then that I get thoughts like “well, you’re gonna stab them sooner or later, so why not just do it now and get it over with” and it makes me anxious and it makes me feel like I’m actually gonna do it. It’s like I get the urge or impulsivity to do it. Has anyone else experienced this
Sometimes It feels like I’m not actually here, it just feels like I’m going through the motions. I feel so drained. But then that scares me bc what if I just go blank and then actually stab my parents or pets. I’m so confused but I also am just too emotionally drained to care
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OCD
|
I feel like I’ve been doing well lately – much better than I was. I’ve been home off work for 3 months. I’ve finally started leaving the house here and there and letting people back in. I stumbled into a trigger the other day and now all of my symptoms are coming back despite being on hire doses of my medications. Is this normal? Can total relapses happen – or is this just a small bump that will go away? Even my suicidal ideation has come back and my compulsive thoughts. I don’t want any of it to get worse.
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ptsd
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A bit over exaggerating - but I do hate this how it is - my biology based hardware/software needs 'reloading' that takes 6 - 8 hours - during witch I might experience visual and auditory glitches - called 'dreams', that might keep my operating memory loaded with garbage daemons for the next morning.
The startup loading time is so long, it needs extra energy input called 'coffee', plus I have to do system running check called 'exercises/yoga' - otherwise it is slow the whole running time called 'a day'
Such rubbish - why cant I just go go go :D
Apologies for my kernel dump. At least there is a kind of root access method mode called 'vippasana meditation' - they say it gives access to the admin level of software/harwdare. One achieves Satori and becomes one with the Admin ;)
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aspergers
|
If anyone here is into either of these 3 bands, do you have any recommendations for similar bands?
I’m currently listening to Pink Floyd on repeat, with albums in chronological order. I will most likely do this for a few more weeks, then switch to one of the others.
I like songs that have lengthy instrumentals, and anything with an ‘unusual’ instrument is good, such as banjo, violin, saxophone for example.
Thank you
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aspergers
|
I am in mid 30s with 2 kids, working in IT and currently on waiting list for initial assessment for adhd ( another month on a 6 month wait)
Currently struggling with work and home, I can't seem to focus and my last few days has been sleeping during the day and stay up from 9pm until 4am trying to catch up on work but didn't end up doing anything.
I mentioned I might have adhd and depression to friends and family in the past but they think I just need a break from work.
I have always just manage to study enough and my grades drops as I continue in to high school and University. I always day dream during class and I can only remember one or two lectures I actually tuned in from start to finish.
Due to pandemic we are now working 100% from home, and work has now changed and we are working more closely as a team rather than individual contributor, that means changing from each individual working on his/her own pace to constant meeting/discussion and review work as a team. I am really struggling now as I am not able to keep up and now I am consider quitting work…
I know there are project due and I am also setting dates to put pressure on myself but now I have no motivation at all, and in the last few days I am also thinking of moving out.
Anyway I am hoping if I post this I can get back to do actual work then thinking if I have adhd or I am just hopeless lazy at 2 am.
- listing a few things I do in the past
- i can game for hours but usually just FPS but I find them boring and I just play it because I got nothing else that I wanted to do
- I have countless of journeys/notebooks, I will start using for a few days and not able to have the discipline to continue to use it until I try again with another one in a month or 2 later, my digital notes are a mess, spread across OneNote, notion, notepad and my own wiki pages
- I forgets small things and makes silly mistakes, such as copying from excel to documents
- I have not been able to study by myself at all or at home, I used to pack lunch and dinner and stay in the university library, but i still need friends or classmate next to me for me to actually study. I tried driving back into work after hour to work before but not very effective.
Edit
14 Nov - diagnosed with ADHD, more medical test, prep for medication
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ADHD
|
Disclaimer - This does NOT mean that this is the case for everyone or even many people. I am not a psychiatrist.
Hi all! I have been prescribed a variety of SSRIs/SNRI for the last 15 years. Every single time I started one, I hyper responded with these feelings that I could not describe. The feelings were so awful and terrifying in intensity - and never went away... Except with Paxil (likely due to it's sedation.)
However, without Paxil - I also felt these same symptoms. Again, feelings that I could not put my finger on. They were FAR less in intensity than when going on SSRIs however.
A year ago, I got a new psychiatrist. He said individuals with Bipolar often respond terribly to SNRIs and SSRIs - particularly when not paired with a mood stabilizer.
He put me on a mood stabilizer a year ago. In the last year, I've been on two different SSRIs with no side effects of this "feeling"... And I also don't have this "feeling" when I'm unmedicated. I have Bipolar 2 and it finally makes sense.
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OCD
|
I had an employee review today, and it went okay.
I was told that the work i do is *usually* good, and i'm *usually* in a good mood and bolster the team. That i *usually don't* snip at people. That they can *usually* trust me to be self-motivated and watch things end-to-end.
The other side of that coin is that sometimes, the work i do is poor, i'm in a brutally bad mood, and bring the team down. I do snip at people. I can't be trusted.
It was hard to hear this, but i'm grateful for the opportunity to improve.
Has anyone else gotten this feedback? I try to be consistent, but it's a challenge; i never know how i'll feel when i wake up in the morning. Any tips or advice on improving this in myself?
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ptsd
|
N(ot )g(onna )l(ie) [sic] I wish I could just crawl or roll around everywhere. I'm thinking about trying out momentum-based movement (like skateboards, hoverboards, roller skates, and maybe bicycles), instead of motorized transport (vehicles), or maybe I could use a wheelchair…
That got me thinking: how do you guys move around?
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ADHD
|
Focus has been a problem my whole life and every single time I've put it down to "I just need to work harder" and there is a chance it could still be that. With the rambling below, I'm wondering what peoples opinions are?
\--- ramble begin ---
I remember during primary school being told my lack of focus could be ADHD in early 2000s, it was ruled out by my parents who said it's just a thing for misbehaving kids and I can focus on video games so I just need to work harder.
All throughout school I barely passed anything, every grade being C or D. I had one exception of a random science module on radiation that I found really engaging and got the highest in the class, 29/30 score.
Got to Alevel, failed everything in my first year, second year just drifted by not really hit by the consequences if I fail. This was until 3 days before a Business Studies deadline my teacher told me I was going to fail as there wasn't enough time, so I worked 3 days 16hours straight each day to do all the coursework in one weekend, this plus my exams of other Es just scraped me into university.
University was a similar story, leave everything till the last minute and just do all the work in the last week or couple of days with a few all nighters. Every semester I'd try sit down and get my work done sooner, even try plan just doing 10 minutes per night but I'd end up spending hours staring at walls and counting the number of patterns or walking around in circles in my room. Alas, every semester work was completed in the last week, barely scraping a pass.
Work started and similar things happened, I'd sit in the office, not do any work usually fiddle with a pen for a few hours in my head having arguments "You're just making this harder for yourself" then having to rush to do a weeks worth of work in a day or two and burning myself out. I've been repeating that process for about 6 years now and being more "Trusted" at the company has allowed me to succeed even though I feel and know I'm not doing enough. Often now it's trying to find excuses of why it takes me longer to do certain tasks.
Throughout all of the above I've never questioned anything, multiple times now I had proved if I just wrestle with myself and force myself I can work, but I'd rather play games as it's not a struggle. Everything else I try I find myself daydreaming or doing anything else within range, whether it's another hobby or music, unless I can get myself 100% engaged by it it's like there is no ability for output unless there is a deadline.
\---
Interested to hear peoples thoughts and thank you if you took the time to read this. I've heard of the NHS having at least an 18 month wait time so that is frustrating.
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ADHD
|
So how do you actually deal with executive dysfunction??? I have tried what feels like every single technique I can find online and none of them seem to work. Some seem to keep me going a little longer but I always fall into it in the end. It genuinely feels like it’s consuming me at times. I need to do something that will take half an hour max, but instead I end up mindlessly scrolling through social media for hours instead. It’s not even like I want to! I spend the whole time screaming to myself in my head saying ‘ok get up NOW’ ‘GET UP RIGHT NOW’ to absolutely no avail. I know my boyfriend is trying to understand but I don’t think he fully gets it, and I feel awful that he ends up doing the mad bulk of the housework.
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ADHD
|
Pain makes us think and reflect on our lives and society. What has pain taught you about life?
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depression
|
im so tired of asking people about this. ive retold this countless times and no one has helped me. please help.
in march of this year, I went to my best friends house. I was having a sleepover with her and my other best friend. at one point, we got drunk. I was very drunk and starting shouting, running all over the room, saying dumb things. but I was aware of what I was doing. at one point I started talking to my friend (lets call her Katie) and told her that I wanted to kiss her, and wanted to kiss her since high school. I was being really close to her, touching her hair, sending her mixed signals. the other friend, lets call her Kathy, told me that I was sending her mixed signals and she was trying to talk about it, saying stuff like "she can't tell if you want to kiss her or not, you're sending mixed signals, we just want to help you in the future etc.". I stared to get overwhelmed by the confrontation and said "stop talking because I don't know what you're saying". they stopped talking and it got very quiet. I was afraid so I lied and said I texted my dad to pick me up, they started asking why but I went to the bathroom and hid. when I got out Katie told me to come to Kathys room so they can explain what they were talking about, but I said no. Katie asked for a hug, but I said no. I went back to the room to get some of my stuff and Katie said she was driving home. Kathy suggested that since I made a situation where we could get caught because I told my dad to pick me up (I might be getting that part wrong, I can't remember) that she should let me drive her to my house. I told Katie "you shouldn't be driving right now" because she had drank, and Katie said "you shouldn't be talking right now". I was getting really scared, and I ended up letting Kathy drive me home. I told her that I was going to kill myself when I got home and she ended up calling my mom in the morning because of it and told her everything. my mom asked why I didn't call her and said that she wouldn't have been mad. I texted the two friends after, Katie said she loved me and Kathy said she forgives me but needed time to think about it. I don't believe Kathy forgives me or that Katie loves me. I can still see Kathys Spotify and for a few months after she was listening to songs about not forgiving fake friends (true friends by bring me the horizon for example).
I feel absolutely awful. I was a coward and feel like I sexually assaulted someone. I have ocd and my brain keeps twisting the situation, I don't even know what to think. I could've killed them because I decided to lie and make them drive drunk. I haven't even truly asked for forgiveness. I don't know what to do or how to look at this. this has been making me so depressed for so long. I want to die every day because of it. please help me someone
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depression
|
How do you help someone that won't help themselves? My significant other has debilitating ocd. They won't seek treatment. They don't see the point in being happy or being mentally well. It starting to wear on me. I dont know what to do. I love them so much, and we are so happy together when the ocd isn't beating them down. I dont have ocd, I have depression, so I know mental health is a bitch but I feel like we've been together so long and I've done so much and I dont know what I can do at this point that can actually be helpful. They just want to be dead. What can I do that will actually help them or actually get them to seek therapy?
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OCD
|
Had a fear of offending supernatural entities, which prevented me from acknowledging that I don't even believe in them in the first place. This felt like the last step to generally closing the door on my magical thinking obsessions, though I still get strong urges to do superstitions bc of how ingrained they are in the culture. That said I will do my best to to avoid doing those 👍
I also have realized that I've formed some more "rational" obsessions, but I am trying to stay aware of those as well.
Figured I'd let you guys know some good news. :)
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OCD
|
Until the wolf is barging through the door and the world is falling apart, I feel as though I have all the time in the world.
That school project? I'll work on it tomorrow (or the day after or the day after - wait it was due yesterday)
That date? I'll push it back to next weekend (oh she's not interested anymore)
That job? I'll apply next week (oh it's no longer listed)
That annual event I really wanted to go to? I'll buy a ticket tomorrow morning (oh they sold out, I'll try again next year I guess)
That overseas travel? I'll push it back to next year (oh there's a global pandemic, guess you won't be going anywhere for 3 years)
That doctors appointment I missed? I'll book it in for a few months (oh shit this lump is getting more painful)
The friend who I constantly leave hanging? It’s all good, they know that it’s nothing personal (oh they haven’t asked me to hang out in months)
The local football team I wanted to join? Missed the sign up and wasn’t feeling fit enough, so I’ll try for next season (oh I’ve got a long term lower back injury now, guess I’ll stick to the sideline)
The rent and utilities? I'll pay them next week when I can be bothered taking 5 minute to set up direct debit (oh they're about to shut off my power and I'm 3 months in arrears with rent)
The day trip with my grandpa? I'll call him to arrange it next week when I find some time away from mindlessly scrolling the internet (oh I guess I'll be going to his funeral now)
Life is unbelievably short and fragile, so why do I float through it as though I have an endless amount of time on my hands?
Of course you shouldn't live life in a state of haste and panic, but living life without urgency doesn't spare you the panic; and when it comes it's even more intense.
I really need to develop a sense of urgency.
​
​
**Bonus Question:** Have you found any form of work that harnesses your unusual way of thinking that meets your need for novelty, and is flexible yet structured enough to keep you on track?
I'm sick of swimming upstream in every job I'm in, and I feel that I have a lot to offer if only I found my footing.
|
ADHD
|
recently i was hanging out with a friend, and i told her about my ADHD. she immediately said she had it too, and started talking about her “symptoms.” i got excited cause i had someone to relate to, and then i asked when she got diagnosed. she told me she had never been to therapy, and she hasn’t been diagnosed. also her symptoms included “being a loud person and having a messy room.” this really upset me, it felt like i immediately had to just shut up and change the subject, because me actually struggling a lot with adhd felt dumb.
i cannot tolerate people doing shit like this anymore. being diagnosed with adhd, it was really relieving and also heartbreaking for me figuring out why i’ve struggled SO much in my life. it gave the answers to my questions on why i couldn’t understand my emotions to the point where i would flip out on my loved ones, why i couldn’t maintain healthy friendships, why i would get so overwhelmed i would have panic attacks in school, or struggled brushing my teeth regularly. it’s not cute.
social media romanticizes mental health in the attempt to normalize struggling with it. i’m all here for normalizing mental health issues, no one should ever feel there’s something wrong with struggling, ever. but the way social media portrays mental health is wrong, and leads kids and teenagers thinking having ocd or depression or adhd is fun.
people saying they are so “depressed” after watching one sad movie and getting over it an hour later or joking about wanting to kill themselves is belittling to people who actually struggle daily. i feel like i’m being over dramatic, but it’s so hard dealing with a disorder that makes it so i will forever struggle to function in a society made for neurotypical people, and people joking about it who DONT have it. i’ve seen lots of other posts similar to this, but i wanted to share my thoughts.
|
ADHD
|
CPTSD has caused me a lot of issues this year. Even before the pandemic, I was out of work. I've spent the year slowly sliding into my overdraft. Any time I tried to find work (I have a history as a freelance/ghostwriter) I'd find myself tripping over flashbacks mid-paragraph, or any time I let my mind rest. Writing became a trigger itself, rendering my job undoable.
As the year progressed, and my mental health journey continued to unravel due to canceled appointments and assessments on indefinite hold, I felt the walls closing in. I'm now stuck in an apartment I can no longer afford, and I can't even move out because 1) I can't afford to move all my stuff, and 2) there's a strict lockdown where my family home is, throwing everyone into a panic about me returning at this time.
On top of all this financial trouble is the typical CPTSD stuff. I'm borderline agoraphobic. I go into fight or flight whenever I leave my apartment. I dodge calls, re-arrange important meetings, and avoid doing things up until the last second because I find anything remotely outside of my comfort zone has a 50/50 shot at triggering me. For me, it's a roll of the dice. I still have certain things I can't discuss or avoid doing, but anything that evokes a negative emotional response, such as being surrounded by too many people in a small shop, can set me off.
That's all the bad. All of it. And it is pretty horrible. I'm long past telling myself "it's not that bad," because, really, I think it is. I think anyone who has this has it bad.
**But that's why today was so good. Today I got up out of bed. Today I washed myself. Today I went out to the store and got some cranberry juice without thinking twice. Today I cooked myself an omelette. Washed the pots. Took the trash out. Today I spoke with a few long-distance friends. Today I answered the phone when an unknown number called and wasn't bothered by it being an automated message. Today I ordered new socks because my old ones were done for - and I CARED about that. Today was perfectly normal, as I imagine it to be for anyone else, and for me, it was one of the best days I've had in a long while.**
Does it change the fact I'm in dire financial strains or mean I won't be a mess tomorrow, or that any one of those things won't trigger me if I tried to replicate them later? No. But today was a good day, and I'm taking my win.
|
ptsd
|
Knowing that you have been labeled with Asperger and you get it now why you have been reacting this way, would you want to change yourself to be what people calls normal or do you want the world to just accommodate your need and you can still be yourself?
|
aspergers
|
Just great!/s Along with all the other crap happening in the world that I simply cannot cope with, I just learned on Google that depression can cause permanent brain damage. So I guess I better stop being unhappy or soon I won't remember my ABC's or go potty by myself anymore. Whatever I've probably already got early dementia, anyway.
|
depression
|
Hi all,
My intention is not to ask for reassurance although i created a post about sexual thoughts i have been having see below and i cant find anyone who has experienced these types of thoughts can someone please advise if they have experienced something similar to the below post? I'm just exhausted and depressed from this whole thing.I dont feel like myself anymore i feel like a monster.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCD/comments/r40edh/please\_help\_me\_i\_dont\_know\_what\_to\_do\_anymore/](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCD/comments/r40edh/please_help_me_i_dont_know_what_to_do_anymore/)
|
OCD
|
Hello Reddit,
My parents are refugees from the Bosnian civil war (1990s) and they've been in the country through the entire war. They've definitely seen some things and it has affected them. I'm having an issue with forming new relationships with people because I cannot introduce them to my parents without drama erupting in the household the very next day. Initially, my parents are friendly to the people I introduce them to but then become extremely suspicious of their intentions the very next day. I've learned to keep my friendships, romantic relationships, and acquittances to myself. I'm not able to ask either of my parents for advice involving people because their mantra is "nobody is your true friend except your family." Honestly, my parents would rather keep to themselves. They don't have any friends and I also noticed that they avoid seeking novelty. This has caused some issues with me in my adolescence when I needed to get involved in extracurricular activities in high school. Anything that I've ever wanted that was out of typical routine would end up in severe arguments. I can explain my reasoning for days and my father would choose not to listen.
It's difficult telling people that they should not meet my parents because it's a typical American custom for people to get to know each other. I don't want to be rude but peace is needed in my life.
Any advice/perspectives will be appreciated. I'm new to this subreddit.
|
ptsd
|
I've recently started taking NAC this past week and honestly it felt like it doesn't do anything at first but then my obsessions have been less intense recently though my stomach does feel weird whenever I take NAC.
|
OCD
|
My mind feels like it was going to explode inside the classroom with so many people talking, lots of laughs that seem to be all directed at me, social anxiety shoots up strong...
|
aspergers
|
I feel a bit broken. I have family that like me and are kind with me (most of them anyway) and I don’t really feel attached to them emotionally. I dot have anything in common with them and their conversations are trite, inconsequential and boring to me. I also feel like I’m often patronised by them and they still think of me as a child at 25. They are always asking ‘are you ok’ ‘you’re not talkative’ but I don’t connect with them. I wish them well but we don’t click.
I have also had a few romantic relationships but I still don’t feel emotionally attached. The lovey dovey stuff annoys me so much and both times these women have become very attached to me and kind of clingy.
I feel bad because these women have been nothing but kind and want to ‘talk through emotions’ with me and lots of hugs and affection ‘I love you so much’ and then I have to fight the overwhelming urge to shout f*ck off at them.
I don’t want to be lonely forever either without family or relationships but I feel like I don’t work properly with other people. I can’t connect and to an extent I don’t want to. I want someone for whom I’m not the be all and end all. Just someone they live with and occasionally do social or private stuff together.
Is any of this relatable to anyone or am I going mad?
|
aspergers
|
I apologize in advance if the post may be long (I will mark with the word FOCUS, what really interests me about the post and also what I wrote in the title)
For a year I thought I had ocd but most of the posts and experiments I did to focus were just on the inner monologue and delving more into Adhd and then also this Thread the first thing I noticed compared to r/OCD is that here is full of posts with this keyword. So I hope to have understood what I really have (it's not a self-diagnosis, I'm simply making many attempts as an autodidact until I can go to therapy again).
The symptoms that I have are: easy distraction, a constant inner voice SLOW that has random thoughts (often more of a rumination than thoughts) that distract me and often do not make me focus on what is around me, I alienate and distract me for a few seconds or minutes to result in even Daydreaming that I always realize after a while that it has started the dialogue between me and me etc. ... Thoughts that distract me in the dialogues of movies, TV series and little concentration in general, even visual, I notice a few elements of the scene or I notice them casually without trying to WANT to see them.
​
FOCUS
Just talking about WANTING and WILL, here is the real focus of this post.
My brain has been willing to activate this manual Inner Monologue for a few months now. As soon as I wake up it's as if I manually turn on my brain and describe every single thing, what I see, do, and what I think even if it doesn't come naturally to me it's as if I force my brain to activate.
Example: I wake up and describe the fact that I'm getting up, that I'm going to the bathroom (in the meantime I purposely look for details of furniture that I have never noticed in my house or things that I have already analyzed visually I reanalyze them as a training to keep my brain active or if I just woke up to activate it) if I see a person I try to think about what he is thinking, what I think, what is the best action to do at that moment or say and the same while they are talking to me (if I can since this particular thing is very difficult for me, when others talks to me it's like my brain stutters) etc... The same goes for hobbies.
(if it is not clear I will explain in the comments).
It is a continuous overanalyzing. All of this obviously tires me out, especially the first times I use it or after a while that I don't use this "mental method".
​
During the months I used it, my outlook improved, my routine, my social relationships, my hobbies, and I was happier in general. The problem is that I think it's all too manual.
You get so tired and it has a weird feeling, you feel like you're getting tired but at the same time you don't feel tired. It's like going to the gym. You get tired but you like it and you want more, I could only describe it like that and it really seems like that's the only natural solution to my problem. The problem is that I always have a voice in my head telling me to rest, that this is not natural, that before I was 19 it all worked automatically and not manually. And so I ask you. Do you have similar stories? What should I do in your opinion? (besides looking for a therapist)
The answer I'm trying to give myself is that at some point I'll be so used to it that I'll feel that it's normal to do it and not manual but the problem is that although I've been using this method for 6 months and my first psychologist suggested to do the same thing (just telling me to organize my day, get physically tired and busy and try to focus, but i dunno I always saw it as general advice) I'm never 100% convinced
THANKS TO ANYONE WHO CAN READ THIS WHOLE POST
TLDR: I don't know if I have adhd, I find myself in a lot of things from the posts I've read but in some I don't know. At a certain point in my life I suddenly found myself chronically de-focused on everything, even my hobbies, and I developed my own method of focusing that I called the "Manual Inner Monologue" where I manually describe everything I see, do and think, trying to organize it in my head as quickly and precisely as possible, but I never know if it's something I should do or not, even though it has brought me only positive results.
|
ADHD
|
I FINALLY was able to gain the courage to use my printer. Then my printer broke. Naturally, because I got over the contamination of the printer, my OCD then decided to obsess over my broken printer making me think this means I'll fail all of my classes this semester.
|
OCD
|
I got a new job and they said I would have to take a drug test for it. So as not to complicate things I stopped taking my meds as it would come up as amphetamines & I don’t want to deal with it. There has been lots of pacing around the house and vocal stimming as I reverted to my old coping mechanisms.
I called in today to make sure my documents were received, all was good, and check when I’d need to do my drug test. They told me that due to my position I don’t have to take one which is awesome. I hung up and took my Adderall booster as it’s too late for Vyvanse. Back to web designing without saying thee most random phrases every 7 seconds!
Side Note - Red 40 (a dye in some foods/drinks) is known for causing worse adhd symptoms. Found out today 1st hand how bad that can be, definitely cutting that out of my diet!
|
ADHD
|
I know this feeling regarding views on pedophilia on Reddit. I simply think pedophiles are defined by more then that disorder ya know their values, morals, actions etc. There's a huge difference between someone who did/only didn't rape/groom a child cause they are afraid of coincidences to themselves and between a pedophile who doesn't want to do anything sexual to a child cause they know its wrong. Also no matter how terrible (I am referring to their fantasies about children) as long as its just in their head and they aren't doing anything like that in real life I think everyone is entitled to think about what they want, without being shot for it or called a monster for it. It's still wrong and they should seek therapy and help if they can but just by being attracted to children I fail to see how that alone already makes them irredeemable monsters as Reddit says. I simply want to judge people on their actions and morals not thoughts (which they didn't even chose btw it's not like anyone wanted to be and chose to be a pedophile) I actually think judging them only on those sexual thoughts is very backwards and dumb. I have been afraid these past few days I am a pedo excuser or even a pedo supporter (I trust you get why I don't want to be something like that), it's been bugging me for days on this summer break when I am supposed to have fun I lay in bed paralyzed at the thought of this, but I really don't think I am I think I see things more gray then black and white. Also while as I already said I do condemn anything sexual to a child like anyone else with a soul I think if the pedophile in question for example gets overwhelmed by his sexual disorder and does something like look at a child with lust he's forgivable as long is he doesn't do something that could impact the child, of coarse he shouldn't do anything of the sorts anyways but I don't think he is already a horrible monster for this. Also for example one post that said "Pedos deserve therapy not our hate" had so many insane comments like "yeah with a bullet" haha yeah these guys that suffer from a sexual disorder they didn't choose deserve to die for it even if they didn't and don't want to do anything to a child irl hurrdurr like I can't be the only one who thinks that is backwards and frankly retarded. At the same time I feel like I am excusing pedos it but logically I really really don't think I am. Like I still think anyone who does anything to any child is as bad as Reddit says but how tf does someone deserve to die quoting many people on Reddit "for the thought alone"!? I take it they think all pedophiles will try to violate a child sooner or later anyways or that all pedophiles just plot to violate a child and those that say they don't just pretend not to but I think its a desire that like any other can be suppressed by their brains if they are moral individuals. Just like when you see a hot girl and you want to do her you won't just rape her cause you have morals they won't rape or do anything sexual with a child cause they have morals. If they don't have them morals they deserve the hate but there are those that do have morals and get hate for absolutely no reason. Also from my understanding being a pedophile merely means you are attracted to children and there's nothing inherently brought by that disorder that makes you want to harm children. I am sorry if this is a bother to you, I just had to let this of my chest, I made a huge ass comment (over 20000 characters) and posted it on r/unpopularopinion but it was deleted by the bot automatically cause it mentioned pedophilia which they don't want to be discussed there. I mean all of this sounds like common sense to me but Reddit makes me want to kill myself like a POS pedo for it. Also for a very small while I was worried about being a pedophile but I think it was actually POCD however since I considering that I won't do anything to children in real life no matter what am not afraid of being a pedophile I think it let me go quickly, I could have been born a pedophile but I wasn't. However I am still scared of being seen like a pedo here on Reddit or like a pedo excuser cause I have this way of thinking. The entire thing is actually irrational cause I don't have anything personal with any of those posts, most of them just say pedophilia isn't a s which is a statement I don't have any issue with (I really don't care how its classified imo it can be classified as a sexuality and still seen for the horrible thing it is but that's a debate for another time) and this is Reddit so it's the last site that I should let get me down for this but for some reason my brain just . won't . let . this . go . since . march . this . year. I guess I am more paranoid about me being a pedophile excuser for my views then the argument itself. I am actually more scared about what Redditors might say then about what they have said already, at one hand I really don't want to be that guy that supports pedos of all people but at the other hand I think I wasn't doing that at any point at all.
|
OCD
|
Hi all,
I am a vet tech student who has been retraumatized by my most recent internship site (animal shelter). I was wondering if there are other veterinary assistants, techs, and DVMs here I could talk with/ ask advice from. Thank you!
|
ptsd
|
\*\*\*Trigger warning that the first paragraph discusses issues of depression and suicidality, but not in any graphic detail. \*\*\*
Everyone here will probably recognize my background story. During my childhood, teenage years, and early adulthood, I never quite fit in. As a kid, I kept to myself, but my family members always commented that I acted very oddly. By the time I was a teenager, I had huge issues making/keeping friends and developed social anxiety and depression by the time I entered college. Through college, I became more and more depressed, developed no new friendships, and was hospitalized several times, and engaged in self-harm as a way of self-soothing.
Part of my depression and isolation meant that I did spend a lot of time alone/studying rather than out partying, so I did very well academically and eventually went to medical school. In medical school, I initially had the same types of issues, and I sought treatment from a school psychologist. She interviewed me for multiple hours over several weeks, performed multiple psychological tests, and ultimately diagnosed me with ASD. This was a complete surprise to me because previous psychologists had told me that I was depressed and had social anxiety but that was it. In hindsight, ASD made perfect sense, and really put much of my past experience in perspective.
Once I understood what was going on, I learned to mask very effectively, and I don't believe that most of my friends notice anything different about me (although, one of my friends from medical school did recently comment that I was "a weird guy" when he first met me.) Fast-forward to present day. I've been married for 3 years. I had never discussed ASD with my wife because it just never seemed relevant, and I was a little embarrassed to tell her. But her sister's family is a huge trigger to me. They come over (or we visit them) and their children (between 0 and 3.5 years old) cause absolute chaos constantly. There is constant screaming and messiness. When they come to visit *us* the children are constantly trying to break things, or getting into things they should be (I don't care about discipline, but our house isn't baby-proofed. . . they need to keep constant supervision of their children for safety). I feel constantly on edge and exhausted by the end of it. They just visited last weekend, and then they invited *us* over to their house for Thanksgiving weekend (all 4 days). I told my wife that I would prefer to go for only thanksgiving, and maybe stay one night, and that if she wanted to spend the whole weekend with her sister, I would be happy to drive separately so she could stay for the extra couple of days.
She basically told me that I was acting ridiculous, so I disclosed to her that I had a diagnosis of ASD, and even though I've learned to hide most of the obvious signs, dealing with her family for long periods of time is extremely stressful for me, and I'd rather not be there for days at a time. She just flatly told me that I don't have ASD and left it at that.
I'm not sure how to feel. On the one hand, I don't need her validation. Telling someone with ASD that they don't have ASD because they're effectively masking is like telling a diabetic that they don't have diabetes because they're on effective medication. But it's still extremely hurtful that she can simply dismiss a lifetime of struggles, and an expert opinion out of hand. Has anyone else had similar experiences where people simply dismiss your diagnosis of ASD and expect you to fit into every situation because you can normally hide your symptoms effectively?
|
aspergers
|
I was on fluvoxamine for a few months and I didn’t even realise what wonders it did for me. A couple of months I moved back and my GP said she can’t prescribe me fluvoxamine because my area was not licensed to (?) I gradually did half dose of sertraline and half of fluvoxamine and felt mostly ok except my moods were insane but this is my second day mostly on sertraline (Zoloft) and today I felt an obsession I haven’t felt in a while. I am so petrified it will come back. I can’t live with that torture and misery. What should I do? Does it get better with Zoloft?
I’m not obsessing too much yet but I am obsessing about potentially obsessing again. I feel defeated since I have a big deadline coming up and it’s my final chance because I ducked up last semester because of my OCD :(
|
OCD
|
I (31 F) went in for an ADHD evaluation, not even suspecting PTSD. I was diagnosed with PTSD as my primary diagnosis, along with generalized anxiety and ADHD. I’m pretty surprised, but it does make sense. Idk what to think about it, but at least I’ve taken the first step. Going to start therapy every 2 weeks, and tomorrow I’ve got an appointment to see about medication, maybe just for the ADHD? Idk what I want out of this post, just wanted to share.
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ptsd
|
It’s been a rough 2 months since my existential OCD flared, if I’m not concerned about solipsism and the uncertainty of never knowing that everybody else is real, it’s my own existance that I’m scared of, and if I’m not interested in those first two topics it’s the after life that drains my energy, it doesn’t seem to end, it doesn’t matter if I’m with my family or friends at a party, I’m already dp/dr, probably one of the toughest topics I ever encountered, so I need some help and stories of people that have been through this and recovered , it may give me hope of not feeling like this for ever, I’m feeling depressed, i don’t care if this is a compulsion I need it.
|
OCD
|
There's SO many recipes/songs I love, but in the moment I can't think of any of them. My brain will just remember one thing and be like spaghetti bolognese, spaghetti bolognese, spaghetti bolognese.
I think I might make some lists of recipes/songs I like and put in kitchen and by the speaker to help me to remember. Any one else have any tips?
|
aspergers
|
Okay, so I'm staring down the barrel of the gun of a pretty shitty life. Right now I'm in college and let's just say things are not looking good. For better or worse, my brain just tends to look ahead. Let's say I have to drop out, after all of my hardwork to get here.
Naturally, I am inclined to kill myself. But, I don't think that's a very good idea for a few big reasons. So I'm very curious what kinds of ideas you all might have of things to do other than kill myself. Any cool suggestions of things to try when your dreams are dead and all hope is lost? All answers welcome, especially creative ones!
|
depression
|
I hate the thought or feeling of any food or drink being in my stomach.
Then I get really anxious and ocd about whether it’s digesting the right way or not, whether it’s affecting my already unstable mood and whether I should have consumed it.
To the point that it’s contributed to my already present skin picking and hair pulling issues and which makes me more stressed.
I wish there was a camera inside of me so I could see what’s going on in my entire body, and how much it’s really affecting my mood.
I don’t eat many foods that aren’t processed sugar junk that’s bad for you for this reason. Because then I get more ocd and anxious about how “healthy” foods should suddenly make you feel mentally well though part of me know that’s not the case and especially since I’m likely mentally ill.
This is stressing me out so much, and I have to get it out. Does anyone else relate?
I hate that food, something that should be enjoyed stresses me out. I hate that I literally become what I ate instead of having an actual personality and peace of mind.
I need help with this.
|
OCD
|
Thank you mom for disciplining me, by yelling so loud that the entire neighborhood hears you. I really enjoy the anxiety that I acquired from it. I really ENJOY it when something drops on the floor and makes a loud noise which causes me to freak the f\*ck out and cry. Thank you very much. My problem isn't as big of some of yours, But I wanted to talk about it anyways. have a nice day :P
|
ptsd
|
Everything is just the same I wake up,work,go home,watch movies. And repeat plus having bad news more and more and handing bad days after another and right now I’m sick as a dog and need someone to be with me or else I feel like my head is going to explode.
|
depression
|
I don’t know how perfectionism affects you guys or if you don’t but for me it’s by far the worst aspect of OCD. Every time I do a compulsion because of my HOCD I can’t enjoy anything I enjoyed the moment before I did that compulsion, I have this weird “better me” thing with OCD, for example let’s say I’m playing a video game and I enjoy it and in the night I do a compulsion and regret it, the next day I won’t be able to enjoy the game anymore because that was from a better time, that was when the “better me” didn’t make that mistake, and this happens for every aspect of life. Buying my favourite food now makes me feel like shit because I liked that food before my HOCD happened, you see what I mean? I can’t even enjoy the season 2/3/4 etc of my favourite series that came out this year, even watching anime isn’t as fun anymore. I don’t know why I do this but I literally can not enjoy anything I did previous to either getting HOCD or doing a compulsion and I constantly have to adopt new things as the memories of the old things I enjoy just give me pain. I really want this to stop
|
OCD
|
you’re not meant to answer questions immediately that monks spend years thinking about
|
OCD
|
I’ve been taking 20 mg adderall for a month and a half
Everything’s been **great**, but
For the past week, I’ve been getting way less sleep. Like, 5 hours, 4 hours, 3 last night
The thing is I’m not even that tired. If anything I have bursts of energy sometimes, I’m **very**easily agitated, and even am feeling confident about the future. I’m actually just about to quit my job too, I **need** to focus on school
I don’t want to sleep. Not because I don’t feel an ounce of tiredness, but because of all that I could probably accomplish if I don’t sleep. The school work, being able to stay up when the run rises, etc.
Before this past week I was getting a great amount of sleep on the meds.
Here’s the thing I get like this sometimes **even before the adderall** but my fear is that the meds may eventually prolong it since it’s literally a stimulant?
|
ADHD
|
I can't reliably feed myself or sleep. I can't do anything I enjoy because I'm so tired and anxious and sick all the time. I feel so alone. I have no one who seems to understand how debilitating my PTSD is. Or they do, but they're tired of me because my situation has not improved in months. I actually think I'm getting worse.
I'm tired of trying to be a person, failing miserably, and hating myself for it. It seems like I'll never be who I want to be. I'll never be someone worth spending time with because I'm such a sink hole and I have nothing to offer those in my life.
I'm exhausted. Life is so fundamentally unenjoyable right now. Nightmares, constant hunger pains, and feeling gross in my own body. It looks like I'm never going to be able to provide what I need to sustain me.
|
ptsd
|
I enjoy the communities that video games create, but I find that I hyperfocus on them to the point that other aspects of my life start to slip away - sometimes entire days, if there’s not an obligation to force me to leave the house. What experiences do other people here with ADHD have with video games?
|
ADHD
|
I noticed that since the beginning of the year, I would have these on and off meltdowns/episodes/panic attacks. I would cry all night after, shaking and trembling, while my husband would hold me and try to console me. The next day I would usually feel fine and even enlightened, and I would write down some new insights about myself or the world. I would feel like I've finally overcome my PTSD and that I won't breakdown again. Then a few weeks later I would have one negative thought, then talk it out with my husband, and next thing I know, I'm having panic attacks again.
I have panic attacks at least once a month I'd say, coupled with a sleepless night full of crying, shaking and self-loathing, and sometimes suicidal thoughts. Most of the time though I think I feel fine and even positive about healing...then it turns out I'm not.
|
ptsd
|
Hello,
I joined reddit at the recommendation of someone close to me to help after a sexual assault had completely just gutted me. I really did not think I'd live past it or repair relationships with just men in general. I came on a couple months ago asking for help and I got it, and the suggestions here helped me to take care of myself and I just want to express how grateful and appreciative I am for all of the encouragement and transparency that I received. Im doing a lot better and know there's a lot of room for improvement still, but I'm finally out of the darkness
|
ptsd
|
My story isn't too different from a lot of others, but it's still somehow not in the public eye. When COVID started, I went home from college to work as an EMT. I thought it'd be quick, but as we all know it stretched into a year and a half fiasco. I was prone to depressive episodes all my life, but not seeing anyone besides my parents and co-workers, and the fact that I felt like I was working my ass off for nothing made it worse. It's dumb in retrospect, but I thought that stuff would improve when I moved back to school and got back to normal. I made some dumb mistakes though, and I feel like I'm sort of screwed now. I didn't make an effort to keep talking to people that stayed back at school, and everything moved on without me. All of the people I used to hang out with seem to be doing their own thing, and none of them want to hang out with me when I try to reach out.
I hate admitting it because it shows entitlement and gullibility, but my school and a lot of my classmates were on the "support healthcare workers" train, posting a lot about it on social media. I thought that because of that time in the spotlight, the school would have services for people who worked in healthcare, and that people who seemed to respect what I did would want to be friends with me. I hate being cynical, but honestly the opposite has happened. I went to get mental health help because I'm having trouble getting over some of the calls I went on, and I'm also having a harder time then I recall previously having with academics. After my consultation, they basically said that I could either meet with a therapist once a month, or I could join a once-a-week therapy group. I'm not a shrink, but I feel like once a month isn't enough. I asked, and they didn't have anything specially for Depression or PTSD, and they also didn't offer any specific therapy/groups for healthcare people or first responders. The closest they had was a suicide hotline number for military veterans. I joined the group they offered because I figured it was worth a shot, but it wasn't great. It felt super awkward, and I felt like nobody in the group had similar issues to me, and I didn't have similar issues to anyone in the group. As for friends, I literally have zero. Not one. I've never had a lot of friends, but having zero is also a new experience for me. I'm looking around online for mental healthcare programs for healthcare/first responders in the city I'm in, but all I can find are articles about various politicians saying how important mental health is. I'm sort of at the point where I feel like discarded trash, but I also don't want to give up. I'm just trying to figure out what to do next
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depression
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Part of my PTSD is medical. As a teenager I was diagnosed with the same disease that killed my grandmother, and was given a 6 month prognosis. On top of this, I had terrible parents who made my diagnosis all about them and offered nothing in the way of psychological/emotional care. I have been seeing the same cardiologist who specializes in my particular disease for 10 years. He is the only one in the state, I cannot change doctors. To put it mildly, he has no bedside manner. He doesn't care about how I am doing mentally or other health issues that might intersect with my disease. He doesn't care about the side effects of my life-saving meds ("as long as they keep your heart beating...")
To say the least, I **hate** going to see him. I am scheduled to see him every 3 or 4 months, but always cancle last minute, so it ends up being every 6-12 months.
Every time I go in I have to do a stress test of sorts that is supposed to be some sort of indicator of how well I am doing, but doesn't take into account other variables that may explain why I do so poorly (asthma, weight, joint pain, regular pain, side effects of the meds I take, etc). This test is a huge source of anxiety for me, a test I can never pass, and doesn't seem to really matter. It is only ever mentioned to tell me how poorly I did.
When I say I have medical PTSD, it's just the same as my other ptsd. Same sorts of symptoms. Flashbacks, dissociation, panic attacks, crying, the whole nine yards. I break into a sweat just hearing his voice out in the hallway.
I have zero coping skills (just recently started therapy and we haven't talked about this situation yet), and zero executive function. I've already decided I'm not going, now it's a fight with myself to make me go!
I have no one that could go with me or speak on my behalf. I have all the authorizations for my meds, so I won't be without meds if I reschedule. Rescheduling would mean waiting another 2 or 3 months to get an appointment (at which time my husband will be working a different job and can go with me).
I just need advice, support, confort if anyone has anything. I just don't know what to do.
*edit: oh, i apparently forgot to mention I have an appointment tomorrow..... my brain is a little scrambled right now, I just came out of an hour long anxiety attack/cry fest and am not thinking all the linearly.
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ptsd
|
I recently tried to open up to a trusted person about the struggle I’ve been having lately. I mentioned life issues caused/impacted by ADHD medication and my anxiety around taking it and was told that I don’t need medication by a close family friend. Instead, I just need to listen to Alan Watts!!!!! Thanks (redacted), my ADHD is cured!!!
Edit: and then she proceeded to argue with my about how adhd isn’t real, and then tried to play me a video on her phone (which I hate when people do that) of Alan watts, oh my god…………….
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ADHD
|
I’ve been doing a bit better recently. Functioning. Getting my homework done and being productive. However,
I used to live with someone who did drugs and feel as though they’ve contaminated all my belongings. I know it doesn’t make sense logically. I haven’t spoken to him in over a year but the damage has been done.
I cant help but feel unsafe in my own home. I feel as if everything i own is contaminated. Anytime i touch an object my obsessions deem “contaminated” i compulsively wash my hands. Multiple times I day. I stress hourly of the consequences if I were to actually come in contact with this contaminant.
Its a literal nightmare. It gets in the way of everything.
All i can think to do to rid myself of this obsession is to sell everything I own. I know i’ll still have OCD, but i’ll no longer obsess over this particularly. I know it’ll work because when I’m on vacation or at a friends house, i don’t obsess nearly as much about their belongings.
My parents have the financial capability to help my sell my car and all of my belongings, but I’m afraid to tell them. I know they’ll think it’s silly. But it would take an immense load off my shoulders.
I know this is rambling but has anyone done something like this? Sold everything?
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OCD
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