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I feel that I'm getting used to be sad and alone. It's like I don't feel a thing sometimes.
I'm just here. Existing. Waiting for something to change, I guess
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depression
|
I don't know I'm actually pretty shallow from the inside and out. My theme of life for the past few years has only been getting bored of everything and being a depressed anxious mess who got into a psych ward a couple times. I'm so tired I can't even ppay videogames or watch series anymore so I have no hobbies. I was getting into drugs and it started with old friends however I lost them and haven't met them in 2 years. I've read a lot about pharmacology and would consider myself a drug nerd. I'm just 19 years old and gay and during a dark time I somehow drunkenly sold myself for money. Somehow when I met these strangers I could have a normal conversation because of the anomity there was. But whenever I think about other normal people or friends I used to have I just feel disconnected. I can't laugh and not sure if I can really open up and I constantly get bored. Especially when there are groups I just go into freeze mode and am overstimulated by everything. Somehow I found myself being able to conversate with druggys because it's my special interest and I like getting high but once again only on occasion and afterwards I feel ashamed. But I wish I could change and be normal. The biggest problem is consistency. I always feel like the odd one in groups and then I never know what to say or do in the future. I remember an old friend wrote me and told me to meet her and I was really excited and before we even had thoughts of trying psychedelics but I just felt so ashamed of myself with my current state that I told her later once I got my life figured out. Somehow I need to make a new identity of myself and blend in with other people. I already lost 2 years of not reaching out to old friends or maybe even lost them. Sometimes it's as if I have a double live with the bad things I've done and can't tell normal people.
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aspergers
|
Yeah that's pretty much it any help is appreciated thanks
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depression
|
No one to give a shit about me. No one to care. No one to talk to. No one. All I have is my ssris. Happy Christmas to me
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depression
|
In my case my OCD makes me get anxious if someone's messaging me and i answer late or for example when i don't say stuff like gn to that person after talking idk
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OCD
|
Like when someone does it under their breath just so you can hear. If you make a scene then everyone will know you got called a retard. What do you do in this situation?
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aspergers
|
It can be about any part of socializing, I just want to get better at it so I can talk easily to other teenagers who are mostly neurotypical
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aspergers
|
I have been traumatized many times. I ignored my art for so long due to pain, dulled creativity, and the toxic communities i was in discouraging my true self. Since starting trauma therapy I have become very creative but i beat myself up alot i am not at the level of art as friends are or even old friends. But while I may be 26 life stopped for me at 15. I didnt have a chance or a spark for my passion for 10 years. I think its ok to be where I am and I will get to where I want to be. Mentally and creatively. Its hard to feel lost its very weird to come into reality and realize i am so different from everyone else in the world.
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ptsd
|
I can’t seem to stop making dumb mistakes at work even with my efforts at prevention, and it’s really bringing me down.
It’s not that I haven’t had access to medicine. I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD and “slow visual processing speed” as a learning disability 4 years ago. I’ve been consistent with adderall. As far as I know, it’s been working fine.
It’s not that I’m new. It’s been nearly a year now. The work is legal in nature and “complex”, but it’s still entry-level. My trainer seems so competent and has only been in my position for 4 more months. New coworkers hired 1-3mo after me (albeit with slightly different tasks) seem to have trained weeks faster than I had and never got scolded for as many mistakes as I have.
It’s not that I’m not actively implementing strategies. I keep a spreadsheet/checklist system to keep track of my tasks because I will forget everything I don’t write down. The problem is, even things I do write down aren’t guaranteed to be remembered. My supervisors think it’s really weird and they’ve brought it up to me several times that I shouldn’t be “wasting” my time with it, but i think it’s because everything is still paper here and technology-phobic. It truly does not add much time at all but I do go back to note where I made a mistake and how to handle a specific situation next time. I think I could prevent more mistakes if I could spend more time with it and be detailed, but it would take more time and it’s obviously being discouraged as it is already. My cubicle is covered with helpful handouts and reminder stickies. I got a smart watch to help with my sense of time.
I am pushing myself 100% each day and still feel like it’s not or barely enough. I always catch my trainer idling on her phone. The whole office, including the newish workers, are constantly conversing and I don’t know how they do it. My only friend is one of the newish workers because they’re the only one I share break times with and can actually stop to talk to— the rest of the office is a little cold to me. One of the supervisors is always on my tail in front of others about things I don’t feel are my fault, but also for things that definitely are so I feel it’s unfair but I’m also guilty. I happily take on more work to help when I can, but when it’s me that feels overwhelmed, my requests for help get refused because they say their work load is also too high.
What triggered this post. I have to process incoming documents and send them to specific authorities asap. Some weeks, it is not possible to do them all within my work period. Some authorities are stricter than others, so coworkers suggested I always prioritize their documents. So yesterday, I printed everything left over at the end of the day and processed urgent ones first and left the less urgent ones for the next day. Then today I get scolded for leaving those ones for today instead of yesterday. And there’s no point in telling them that I was suggested to do so because those people will claim they said otherwise. Maybe I do keep twisting everything. Idk if that makes sense.
I am proud of my work and care about the people I serve, but everything I do seems to be wrong. I’m trying to promote out of this office, but I’m so scared that it’s just going to be the same. I wish I could put in the same amount of effort as everyone and still be successful.
Sorry for this very long post, but I felt hopeless looking through adhd posts and articles where it’s like “have you tried a to-do list??” I’m just looking for some support or helpful criticism. Thanks for reading, though it was probably too long for most of us here lol :(
|
ADHD
|
I have always been the quiet kid with absolutely no friends that no one knows anything about. I spend all day watching YouTube and maladaptive daydreaming . I create scenarios and conversations inside my head and I think that what kept me going with no friends and no one to talk to ,but when I return to reality it's so crushing
I have no hobbies and I just want to play video games , I thought about trying to improve in a video game and play competitively ,but I can't because my internet is so bad
I don't talk to anyone , I met no one with my interests and I can't get any help as I live in a third world country (therapy is literally non-existent her)
Normally people in poor country have close connections ,so depression is rare ,but I grew up on the internet with no friends.
I think I have no choice other than killing myself the only reason I didn't do it already is thinking how my parents would react to it
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depression
|
would be interested to hear ur experience of ocd’s physical manifestations. the stress ocd has put on me over the course of my life has caused, at different points:
• vomiting
• heart palpitations
• severe weight loss
• self injury
• stress hives
• abrasions from dermatillomania
|
OCD
|
I'm 60 and wasn't diagnosed with what was called Aspergers until 6 years ago. I had a traumatic brain injury with no permanent damage but after the event, I visited different specialists (cardiology, neurology, etc.) to make certain I was healthy and in the clear. One specialist ran an extremely long series of tests on me, which was when I learned I was on the spectrum. For me, it was like turning on a light in a dark room - my entire life suddenly made sense.
Only reading on Reddit in the last 6 months did I learn about masking. I honestly wasn't aware that I had any ongoing conscious behavioral adaptation in play (I didn't realize what a mask I wore and how draining that is) and about a month ago, I stopped masking as best I could. It wasn't like flipping a switch - I have to be aware of my behavior in every interaction or even when taking a walk alone! Maybe others can relate, I don't know.
Wanted to share that with people who'd understand and thank you for the forum to do so.
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aspergers
|
https://www.anxietycanada.com/sites/default/files/adult_hmocd.pdf
|
OCD
|
I've always had trouble getting anything done, before meds (Adderall XR 30mg is what I eventually landed on after about 6 months) my life was a mess, literally and figuratively. Now when I think, "I need to clean this, or I should organize this" I actually get up and do it. Quite life altering.
My dilemma is that i want to take a day or two off my meds on weekends, but those are the days I'm not working and actually have time to work on projects and clean and organize what I don't have time for during the week with a 1.5 year old and it now getting dark within an hour of getting off work. If I don't take them I have extreme difficulty getting anything done.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
|
ADHD
|
Sometimes, amidst the overpowering nausea, blackout spells, and shaking legs, I force myself to imagine my worst fears coming true.
Finding confirmation that I *am* as irredeemable as I believe. Finding unshakeable, substantiated proof that I *really* *did* all the things I'm afraid I did. That any people I might have hurt by mistake really *are* as traumatised and violated as I imagine them being. (I'm not going into specifics. My OCD themes are extensive, detailed, and awful).
And instead of horror, I feel relief.
Not relief at the hypothetical actions themselves - that's disgust. Rather, I feel relief towards the idea I would finally have a ***firm*** ***answer.***
*Am I truly so horrible, or am I not?* It's classic OCD to perceive your own moral world in black and white, contrasting sorely with the gray reality of things. If I knew what I was, I'd know what to do. I'd know that every stone carried on my back is deserved, and every good thing OCD has led me to withhold from myself is justified. I'd know to call the psychiatric hospital, or turn myself in, or just >!end it. !<I'd understand that every second of mental turmoil is warranted.
Instead, I'm left to wonder, in perpetual uncertainty. Struggling to take care of myself, or view it as worthwhile. Waiting for an answer that never comes. Scouring for evidence, endlessly. Twisting what I find which way and that, until it takes whatever form I feel like that day. Guilt, innocence, undecided. Guilt, innocence... on it goes.
I will never find an answer. I must live with the fact that perhaps an answer doesn't even exist to begin with. No greater force is going to come down and tell me.
I just want to be good. I don't want to have hurt anyone. It eats me alive.
|
OCD
|
possible tw — no triggering words but implied
(for context, i am diagnosed with depression, and it’s quite debilitating. i suffer from an ED. i suffer from some degree of PTSD from previous sexual assaults, which were already quite distressing, but those were not penetrative until this happened. this happened almost exactly a month ago, it’s so stupid.)
I don’t remember much of my assault, it feels more like a fever dream to me — vivid, yet as if it happened to someone else. I guess I remember random details like which side of the bed I was on, the positions I was in that had caused me pain, when he nearly knocked the chair over with how hard he was doing what he was doing (and i remember feeling in the moment that i’d break my face on the mirror frame and wall if i fell over with the chair). I remember the most painful moments most vividly. But I can’t tell how long those lasted. I remember only some of the things he said to me. “Cry harder” are words that will follow me forever because of everything that happened after.
I’ve been spacey a lot since then. I know that after the first horrid part, in the 2 or so hours after the fact, I had checked out. I specifically remember two things: 1) getting him off me and running out of the room — when i was in the most pain, at my most desperate, broken, hopeless state knowing i was frozen in place, this was what I had in my mind although in the background I could hear my actual self crying out loud, wailing; 2) the rest of the time after, I constantly flitted in and out of my body.
The best way I can describe it is seeing myself sitting cross-legged on the floor of a vast but completely barren amphitheatre, staring at the ‘screens’ which were, in effect, my own two eyes. The screens were my eye sockets. I was a separate entity inside of my own head, and sometimes I felt everything that was happening, right down to the pains in my body and the pressure he placed on me; other times I would just be that tiny person sitting in the inside of my own brain, feeling like my body and what it was doing or reacting to were happening to someone else. It was in greyscale, had no sounds. In those moments I seemed like a prost*tute, enabling him by doing and saying things, and making sounds that got him off. That made him pleased. It was like putting on a show, except I had no idea who was running it. I was just… sitting there and letting it happen and not realising that was me too.
I don’t know how to heal from this. Every waking hour I think about it. Many times I wonder, maybe I’m forcing myself to. My brain puts moments on repeat, as if I’m walking through reruns of it and trying to find answers that won’t satisfy me. I just can’t put it to a side. My life feels like it revolves around these thoughts now. I keep thinking and thinking and thinking about it, always only to end up blaming myself — I know I put myself at risk of this happening, because I shouldn’t have met him in the first place; I was doing a bad thing to myself and this was my punishment. I feel decayed on the inside, like I want to wash everything inside of me with acid. Yet my skin looks like it was never touched, never adulterated, never violated nor subjected to pain, and I feel like I wasn’t punished enough. I even get angry that he didn’t kill me, that he didn’t do worse, because maybe if he had made it more obvious that *he* did it *TO me*, I’d stop thinking of myself as an accomplice to what he did. That fucks me up so much, because I’m convinced I deserved it, yet I feel traumatised be it.
It’s also so hard to just… feel anything. All I want to do is grieve about it. To cry, to feel angry, to be able to feel like my world is falling apart because that’s what it looks like now. Yet all I feel is empty. But at the same time, while feeling nothing, I also know that something feels missing and my soul is aware that something has gone terribly wrong. It feels ominous inside of me, but my emotions don’t exist around it. It’s just blankness. And all I want to do is fucking feel something. Anything.
After a whole day of feeling generally flat, not-so-okay, just caught up in my head as usual, laughing in a movie theatre at a movie with stupid tricks, I somehow found myself reading up about Ingrid Betancourt. I read her one-week-after-rescue interview where she didn’t want to talk about her trauma. I don’t know why I found myself desperately needing to know if she was violated in ways that I was too. I went to the reviews on two of her books, and finally chanced upon a review that gave me the answer (of course, mine wasn’t as remotely close to what she had been through; she lived those days for over 6 years, while i only lived it 2 hours). For some god awful reason, I started tearing up then. But then my brain churned more ‘needs’, and all I wanted to do as I read through review after review (all talking about how ‘graphic her depictions of her experiences with torture, and abuse, were’), was to find her books and skip to the pages where she would describe her brutal assaults in graphic detail, until I made myself too sick to read any more.
Why? Why would I want to do that? Why did I do any of it? What was the purpose of going down this slippery rabbit hole? What difference would reading the books have made? I barely understand. All I feel is guilty, and shameful, and a horrible person. I feel vile, like scum. I feel unforgivable. I don’t know why I’m like this. Why my thoughts are like this. I have a lot of self-hate and the voice in my head is a bully, but I don’t understand why I’d want so much to force myself to feel awful. Why am I trying to make sense of the things that were taken from me, from someone else’s heartbreaking story? What kind of person am I?
I ended up just scrolling to the end of the reviews, feeling awful about knowing that one vague bit about what happened to her, and for being such a bad, cruel person to want to read more about how she was victimised instead of how she survived. And then I just started crying. Just overwhelming, heavy sadness that came from nowhere. I didn’t have a thought in my head. Everything was just foggy and blank and I couldn’t pin point anything. I just cried. I’m still on the verge of crying once more now, but that weird emptiness is creating distance from feeling again. In both areas, I feel heavy.
I just… I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t know what I’m becoming. I just wish someone could tell me what the fuck I’m doing wrong or why it’s happening or how to stop feeling it even when deep down, I feel stuck in not really wanting to (again, because I deserve to feel like shit for putting myself here). I also just wish I was dead, just so my brain would finally stop.
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ptsd
|
My mother : the sweetest person. I was a smart kid, excelling at school, but she was the one who opened my eyes to all the knowledge out there. We used to read the same books from our local library, sometimes difficult ones for 10-14 yo me, and had our own references no one got in the family. She was always there for me growing up when my father was more focused on my studies and career.
My sisters : Love them both, to the death. One is just like me with two X chromosomes, the other is so gentle and caring. They have always looked up to me and they seem so happy in their lives.
My GF : been together since the first year after high school (8 years now). She's doing great in life and tries to push me forward but I struggle. We attended virtually the same schools, did some bit of long distance, but always stuck together. Now she's following her dream career while I feel like a burden.
These are the people who make me wanna try. But I always say tomorrow is a better day. So maybe tomorrow we try again ?
|
depression
|
Long story short, I am always forgetting to take my meds (some for adhd and some for anxiety/depression). When I forget to take them I get what I've explained to my partner as "fishbowl head", where my brain feels like its bangin' around in a glass fish bowl. It isn't pleasant and it usually puts me out of action for the afternoon/evening.
I bought a 7-day pillbox to help keep track but of course, 'out of sight, out of mind'. But a while back I read here that someone uses their 'reminders' app on their iPhone as an extra layer of security. I had been using a regular alarm but as a lazy grad student I have become adept at unconsciously snoozing those.
Well, it has been a month since I started doing that and I haven't forgotten my meds since. I think it works great because it has a little red notification that pops up which doesn't go away until you've gone into reminders and snoozed it. I set the reminder for 10:00am; late enough that I can catch myself if I've had a busy morning but early enough in case it's a sleepin' in day. On top of that, it has encouraged me to also set reminders for other things!
Like most advice on here, they usually seem like simple little tricks. But bless our little ADHD brains, simple ain't always simple! So big thanks random Redditor, you changed my days!
\- tldr; I started using my iPhone's 'reminder' app to remember to take my meds, haven't forgotten in over a month! -
|
ADHD
|
I lost my eye in 2016/17 (can’t exactly remember) but I have no complete vision in my right eye, I also have another illness which I’m not comfortable disclosing here, but it affects my general health, I’m an outcast at school due to cunts making up rumours about me, I feel like I don’t have a place here anymore, theirs just shit that keeps me from living on, and in 2018 something happened to me which affected me health even more, so yeah, Reddit I’m finding no reason to live anymore, the Christmas holidays make it even worse for me…so yeah, I should just kill myself
|
depression
|
i understand it with certain things, like doing an action or something in the world happening etc. but how do you accept it with certain things you WERE sure of before and even now sure are when you’re thinking logically? like with things like pocd, which i have. i was certain i wasn’t into kids, when i have a clear mind i know i’m not now. also with things like hocd, etc. before these themes we KNOW we aren’t these things, and i’ve seen multiple people say they know they aren’t when they have a moment of clarity. so how do u accept uncertainty about these things? am i just suppose to be like “hm, yeah. could be a pedo who knows!” and be okay with that? this is just making it worse. and before anyone brings up a therapist for ocd, plz do not. i currently cannot get one nor can i use things like nocd. i am currently on my own in this besides reddit.
|
OCD
|
hey so im not even sure where to begin with this or if it belongs here so sorry in advance
i dont have a PTSD diagnosis but i’ve been to therapy for depression and anxiety and my last therapist had mentioned PTSD but i stopped going because i wasnt ready to open up about going through intimate partner violence
im 98% sure what i went through following that relationship wasn’t normal but from what I understand, if what I had was in fact PTSD, its in remission after almost two years of working through it
ive been okay for the past couple months, nothing has really come up that i havent been able to work through but today at work i made one little complaint about a customer and my coworker decided to tell me to relax, not in a mean way more like trying to tell me to chill out
i’ve let him know before that telling me to relax or calm down when im like at a 3 is upsetting for me (because it reminds me of being constantly gaslit) and today again i explained to him that i dont like when he does that but after that i think it kept bothering me.
i tried working but try as i might my mood crashed steadily over the next three hours and by the time i went on my lunch i was abysmal. I literally sat down with my head down for a solid 15 minutes without saying a word trying to drag myself out of it but i havent felt so incredibly depressed in a long time and its weird that it happened so suddenly and was so hard to break out of.
does anyone know what that was or if it sounds familiar because i dont even know what to say when i clock back in and im more embarassed than anything because my coworkers were really worried.
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ptsd
|
I was out having a guys night with my only two friends and my best friend brought his brother in law, and i had met the guy many times before. and i know the guy\`s name. but i can\`t remember... i really suck at names.
so i avoid admitting that i can\`t remember, because people take offence and i have to try to explain that its not because i don\`t care or anything.
but this time i got exposed and since my friends know me, i did not have to explain. but instead of reminding me they teased me by making up new names for the guy. i could tell all where bullshit since its like i know his name i just don\`t remember the word. ( can anyone relate? )
they had a blast teasing me while i " hand checked every word" i could find in my brain, and im not going through just names, its more like: stickers? no, Bill? no, watch? no, potato? no.
but in the middle of this my girlfriend calls to check in on me, and i remember that she has met this guy once at a housewarming party, so i asked her to help me out, and she\`s like oh yeah that\`s the guy with that name.
I mean what an impressive skill. she has explained to me once, that if she gets a quiz where like she needs to find words with 3 a\`s in it like Banana she can steadily go through every word with at least 2 a\`s
For me its like every word i know comes down on a conveyor and i try to pick out anything with even one a in it.
maybe it does not help having 2 languages. i find myself thinking in both and even when writing i find myself sometimes writing in both languages because sometimes its easier to find the right words in one over the other.
does anyone else struggle with words like me?
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ADHD
|
I am kind of on this longterm plan, where I had huge amounts of foods that aren't the ones I do as my daily meals, and they kind of were fine being stored longterm, but it upset me knowing they were there, so I've been finally working them down, and I'm finally getting close to eradicating them! :) There was the oatmeal, when I do yogurt, as well as the strawberry jam jar, and then there were all the ramens, when I prefer salad currently, and then there were all the boxes of mashed potato flakes and the pasta, when I prefer chicken, rice and veggies.
Well, sub-optimal meal by sub-optimal meal, I am getting close to the efficient kitchen situation of just the things I am actively wanting and using, and it gives joy!
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aspergers
|
I work in a bar, thats been pretty stressful with lockdowns and we currently have to do table service. (Something we are not used to)
Last weekend two ex employees came up for a drink, but were pretty cooked. Im usually the manager that trains employees, tries to make them feel welcome and have a friend. So its not unusual for me to stand out a little to a new face.
The problem is these two remembered me, i only remembered one of them. The one i didnt came up and greeted me by name, and i was caught off guard. Because she seemed drunk i had wrote it off as a customer and cut her off, saying ill give her a 10 minute break and have some water.
Her boyfriend eventually got aggressive with me that i didnt serve her. He asked how could i think she was intoxicated and i explain she was slurring her speech and giving illogical responses in my conversation with her.
He told me english is her 3rd language (didnt really matter, she was still cooked) and she asked me if i remembered her.
I immediately said no and saw her face. It dropped. I felt awful, to be that guy. To not have any memories and imply she didnt make an impact or mattered.
She only worked with me a couple of weeks, and after talking with some coworkers i remembered some things. But i hate how horrible i was, i had no answer or justification to why i couldnt remember but she could.
I wanted to blurt out I have adhd and we can struggle with memory sometimes... but i felt it would look like a made up excuse to cut the tension.
|
ADHD
|
Although I'm not officially diagnosed I am anxiously counting down the days. As Dr Todd Grande has mentioned in his video titled "chronic suicidality" many people who are chronically suicidal have a block to attempting suicide (pets, extended family, friends). In my case, and I'm not sure how common this is to others, is the acceptance of this type of therapy.
I've been in therapy for a long while and have exhausted myself financially. I also gave myself a mild traumatic brain injury after an attempted suicide 7 months ago, for which symptoms cleared up 4 months after the injury (I still feel like there was lasting damage).
I am so irritable all the time and I just wish it would end. I'm constantly on edge. It's like a blanket of stress that is permanentely on me. My friends have access to MDMA and sometimes I think to myself, "fuck it", im tired of suffering. However, I know there can be unknown substances within the mixture and because I value and need my intelligence I am very hesistant to try.
Is anyone else in this situation?
Have you an official diagnosis of PTSD and how did you get it?
|
ptsd
|
I have OCD and every day I wake up I'm so scared what thought is going to stay in my mind today since I struggle with intrusive thoughts when I overcome one it creates another one to be obsessed about and when I realize I'm getting a new thought I panic or derealization or depersonalization happens and I go for weeks compulsing and it changes to another intrusive thoughts
example:- flase memory ocd has been brutal what if I'm the one that killed that person,what if I was pregrant when I know deep down thts not true but somedays its seems like it actually happend and I get scared tht i'm going crazy
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OCD
|
My partner, DX with ADHD, has been taking Stratera for almost two months now. He often experiences nausea around 2 hours after he takes his daily dose of Stratera. Has anyone else experienced this? If so, do you have solves? I know I got nauseous when I first started my anti-depressants but it didn’t last this long, so I’m a little worried for him.
|
ADHD
|
I'm a girl in my mid-teens. I have a boyfriend who is almost 2 years older than me, and we've been dating for one and a half years now. We're in an LDR which makes things difficult sometimes, but despite that he's still an amazing boyfriend and we've managed to maintain a great relationship for the entire time we've been dating.
I've told him a bit about my health anxiety before, and he's been really supportive and cool about it. He's even told me he himself struggles with germaphobia and we've discussed it together which really made me feel better, but since about 2 or 3 months ago I've been struggling with some pretty heavy intrusive thoughts. It's making me feel terrible and gross on a daily basis and as much as I hate to say it, it's starting to affect our relationship too.
It's been getting worse recently, to the point where I really wish I could talk to someone about this or get help, and I feel like if I do it would be really dumb not to tell my boyfriend first, but at the same time I've never discussed such a heavy topic with him and I have no idea how to bring it up. He's a great person and I trust him, but I still can't help but worry about how he'd react.
At the same time I really want to tell him, and I feel like I should talk to him first before I try getting any professional help.
Do I need to tell him about my intrusive thoughts, and if so, how much should I tell him? How should I even bring it up in the first place? If anyone else has been in a similar situation or has any advice it would be really helpful to know.
|
OCD
|
I’m not suicidal, I wish I was. I don’t know why I want to live so much if I’ve got 60 more years of this shit.
I spent my Friday night on the couch while watching my comfort show. Cooking usually makes me happy but when I did it I felt nothing.
I feel like there’s some fucking malaise hanging over me that’s going to be there the rest of my life.
|
depression
|
Hi all. I was recently diagnosed with inattentive ADHD after struggling with it my entire life. My psychiatrist had me try Strattera for two months and my side effects were terrible. I got switched to concerta the other day. I went to pick it up at my CVS pharmacy (I have insurance through CVS caremark) and was told it would be $85 for generic. I asked about brand name because I heard it was much better and they said $380 until I showed them my concerta savings card I got online and it was brought down to $180. My dad has a well paying job and I have insurance through him, but he doesn't pay any of my bills. I ended up taking the generic because I'm desperate for help and 5 minutes of research later I find my generic (trigen laboratories) has been received terribly by most people. I feel really overwhelmed and can't pay this much for mediation, and was really hoping anyone could give me some advice about what I can do in this situation. Also, should I try this generic or try to return it? Thank you so much
|
ADHD
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Sometimes I’ll think a word in my head and I’m like “oh shit that’s racist” or “that was such a mean thing to think about another person” and that makes me a horrible person, etc. is this an OCD thing? I feel like it is bc it’s an intrusive thoughts and then mental compulsions about them. This one just started so I’m trying to not let it get too bad. Any tips?
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OCD
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Two days ago I saw my attackers car. I knew it was him because I remember memorizing his license plate. This is the first time since the attack I’ve had a true out of body flashback. I spent the last two days getting black out drunk. I’m finally feeling good enough to stay sober today, but I can’t leave the house. I guess I’m just writing this to put it out to the universe. Still making sense of it all.
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ptsd
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I moved from Arizona to Florida with my boyfriend due to toxic family where I'm from and him being able to be close to his family who supports us in more ways than mine ever did.
I was emotionally abused growing up and it never stopped till I forced my mother to stop contacting me.
All my life she compared me to others and denied anything was wrong with me I was just ungrateful in her eyes.
A part of me misses the family because it is what I grew up with and they're family but they have made me feel so worthless.
My boyfriends family loves me and it's hard to handle their love because I haven't been treated that way before by "family members".
Why is it so hard to process trauma. I have suffered from depression/anxiety/ADHD since 7th grade and I still don't know how to handle it.
Why are the main thoughts in my head "you aren't good enough. You're a failure. You don't deserve anything"
I just want to think normally
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depression
|
Hello everyone,
I’m new to reddit so idk if i will even get a response but i’m desperate. I’m a 19 y/o female and I was diagnosed w ADHD (combined type) around 2 months ago. For reference i’m 5’8” 110lbs. Before I started any medication I was 118lbs. At first they put me on 30mg of Vyvanse, which I hated how it made me feel. The crash was always awful and it killed my appetite, causing me to go from 118 to 112. Although it helped me focus SO much better, the weight loss was a big deal for me bc i’m trying to gain weight. I am legit a twig. I talked to my doctor and they switched me to 20mg of adderall. I’ve been on it for 2 weeks now and I will say I’ve been eating a lot better on adderall than I was on Vyvanse. But i’m still losing SO MUCH weight. I already had an extremely fast metabolism before starting medication, and now I feel like it’s so much faster. Pls send tips on how to stop losing weight😭I cry about my weight every day and my family has noticed how skinny i’ve gotten and they’re worried for me.
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ADHD
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Edit: since a lot of people are asking, I received these tests from a neuropsychologist who works in the specialty Care center of a local hospital. This doctor was referred by my neurologist, who was referred by my therapist.
I always figured I was a bit... off. Feel a bit more at peace with my past, now knowing that this is something developmental and not really within my control.
Not really sure where to go from here other than my continuing therapy. Doc Recommended CBT, Group therapy, more creative outlets and Non-Stimulant meds (perhaps homeopathic, such as CBD).
Guess I just needed to vent this.
Some excerpts below:
Tests Administered:
Wechsler Adult Intelligence Scale – IV (WAIS4)
Repeatable Battery for Assessment of Neuropsychological Status (RBANS)
Wide Range Achievement Test-5 (WRAT5)
Delis-Kaplan Executive Function System subtests (DKEFS)
Tower of London DX2 (TOL-DX2)
Brief Symptom Inventory (BSI)
Conners Continuous Performance Test-3 (CPT3)
Behavior Rating Inventory of Executive Function-Adult Form (BRIEF-A)
Personality Assessment Inventory (PAI)
Beery Visual Motor Integration test (VMI)
Gilliam Autism Rating System -3 (GARS3)
Barkley Adult ADHD Rating System -4 (BAARS4)
TOMM
Rey FIT
>Patient is a 28-year old married male who reports a history of apparent attention deficits as well as difficulties in social skills and relationships. Current testing finds overall high average intellectual level, but with low average speed of processing. He shows adequate attention for auditory-verbal information but below average visual attention skills; he also shows weak executive function skills, with better performance in structured tasks or settings, and deficits in several emotional regulation areas and in some organizational skills. Memory, language, and basic academic skills are at least adequate, and visual-spatial skills showed adequate perception but difficulty in performance that required close work or complex designs. Behavioral and emotional functioning showed elevated scores on multiple symptom areas, especially interpersonal sensitivity, repetitive behaviors, anxiety, phobic anxiety, hostility, suspicion, and thinking problems, difficulties with interpersonal relationships, feeling socially isolated or detached, and mild depressive symptoms, interspersed with elevated and variable mood. His personality style appears to involve a degree of adventurousness and a tendency to be impulsive. The presence of ASD features was also strongly suggested.
>Patient presents a complex case that involves high average intellectual skills features of ADHD (inattentive and impulsive type), with features of ASD(Asperger’s Disorder) as well. His apparent good early language development argues against more severe forms of ASD. His symptoms also include executive function difficulties that appear to pervade both interpersonal and some cognitive (organizational) skills. It appears that the combination of these features contribute to his current interpersonal and emotional difficulties.
Diagnostic impression is:
1. Attention Deficit-Hyperactivity Disorder (F90.0), primarily inattentivetype
2. Asperger’s Syndrome (code F84.5)
3. Executive function deficits (code R41.844)
4. Anxiety (code F41.1)
5. Dysthymia (code F34.1)
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aspergers
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This is especially the case for people with harm ocd or sexual-related ocd. Your OCD brain automatically makes you feel guilty anytime you feel fear. And every time you feel guilt (ex: why would I feel this way if I weren’t guilty of __) you automatically feel fear. The only way to break the cycle is to recognize that your brain works this way and to understand that this is your illness creating a sense of guilt and immediately reacting with fear and intense anxiety.
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OCD
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Totally forgot that March into the end of April when the ‘incident’ happened is when the night terrors come back no matter what kind of medication I am on. A friend reminded me of this tonight. This year will be 5 years. If I could occupy my mind and body with something during that time when it did occur I would but it happened at like 1-2am and everyone I know is sleeping. Guess I will be in for a roller coaster of dreams til it’s over. Wish me luck I come out on the other side again!!
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ptsd
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Hey, so I'm 23 and have ADHD. Until a year ago I wasn't diagnosed. I'd like to be very clear that I know I can't armchair diagnose people and would only go as far as to suggest I think this person can seek help.
I know what undiagnosed ADHD looks like - my life spinning out of control and unable to stop it no matter how hard I tried. A huge sense of shame, always feeling tired *yet* anxious and restless, simply trying to keep your head up above the water 24/7. Getting diagnosed hasn't just given me the ability to take ownership of my life, but it's given me permission to fail, which has been instrumental for me.
I have a friend from undergrad and I suspect she should seek an ADHD assessment. She is always late. To everything. No exceptions. I met up with her for lunch once and I *actually* arrived on time. After 10 minutes of waiting she texts me saying she'll be 5 minutes. 35 minutes later she rocks up, and then spends about 2-3 hours there with me .
She can be quite flakey. I tried a few more times to make further plans with her and she'd always flake or not reply. I assumed maybe she just doesn't want to be friends and left it, but then took a year out of uni (due to, unbeknownst to me at the time, my own ADHD), and the day I was leaving though "why not?" and shot her a text explaining I'm leaving and that I'd be in this room if she wanted to say bye. She rocked up and was honestly flustered, a bit out of breath, seemed shocked and a bit upset I was going, which honestly made me laugh as I'd been trying to meet her for a year and she'd been airing me. I did gather it probably wasn't intentional but also thought on a deeper level she just doesn't want to or isn't able to maintain a friendship with me (and that's fine), so decided to leave it and let her contact me. That's the last time we spoke (2 years ago).
I know she's had issues with keeping up with work and don't know specifics. One time (years before I was diagnosed) I was sat opposite her in the library, really struggling with work. No exaggeration, for an hour I am struggling with my work and just completely averse to studying - checking social media, not concentrating, etc. She is sat opposite me and I'm intimidated by how hard she's concentrating - typing extremely fast, not taking a break, so so transfixed on her screen. I look over at her every now and then honestly a little intimidated at how hard she was working. Well, an hour passes by, she stops typing, she looks at me then says "I have just spent an hour doing buzzfeed quizzes". I laughed so hard because I was thinking "that is so me!!!!!" I've always felt like she's on my wavelength and the reason that memory stayed with me is cos it was so \*on point\* and relatable.
I guess she's an old friend and someone I really felt I connected with, but honestly I was not *that* close to her. Like... we got on really well when we met up and shared a lot of personal info, but we were both extremely disorganised/flakey, on separate courses, in separate groups - we just never really got a chance to become close friends.
I've gotta be honest though I've thought about her from time to time ever since I got diagnosed because I know how similar I felt I was to her, and I know how much this diagnosis has helped me. Also, in my country, 88% of people with ADHD are undiagnosed. Couple with that she is a woman of colour, there really is no reason to believe she'd have been diagnosed by now if she did in fact have it.
I guess I just want opinions from other people with ADHD? I haven't spoken to her in 2 years and we weren't super close, despite clicking and (I believe) caring about each other? I don't know her well enough to have had any long term insight over her behaviour (like, I didn't live with her or anything, wasn't in the same classes as her). However I am quite perceptive, and we were in a tight nit community (and the fact everyone knows everyone means at the time I knew people close to her who yeah would pretty much corroborate my general impressions of her (messy, always late, disorganised, etc.))
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ADHD
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Am I aspie or not? That’s what I am struggling with. If I pick wrong, in either case I am living a lie of being self oblivious to who I really am for life. Changed into thinking I’m something im not. A terrifying notion.
This has become a life paralyzing situation.
Let me show you how hopelessly ambiguous this is for me.
I have OCD and bipolar 1. I am medicated well. But my living condition doesn’t allow the condition to be totally stable. If I am chronically symptomatic, that could in theory tilt me into social problems and strange mental eccentric changes. You can start being too talkative, missing out on cues. Not being quite yourself. With ocd, I can mix an episode like this with Ocd compulsive explaining which I do sometimes.
I learned recently I wasn’t in touch with my emotional self. So I was operating from a logical headspace because I wasn’t in touch with feeling and being and behaving from that place. I feel like I have had moments where I am sure I actually in a neurotypical wavelength. I feel like that’s the real me.
When I got into that place I suddenly had this urge to just go socialize and drop all these games and topics and ideas I put all this alone time into. I suddenly wanted to do things with people for them, not fir doing things WITH them.
I have learned that if I eat very well for a few days I seem to fundamentally change. Suddenly these Pokémon interests and other interests associated with being an aspies are gone. Suddenly I just want to get a job and it’s like I’ve snapped out of something. I have had so many instances of feeling like I’ve recovered into my true self. I’ve had this happen with 8 different impressions of thinking I was my real self. They were all different.
An aspie counselor has said she thinks I have it. BUT I worry I presented to her with all these eccentric problems from something else.
Ugh, what, a nightmare
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aspergers
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Going to get evaluated for ASD in October. Looking into Asperger's especially since if I did have such a condition, it'd probably bee Asperger's, which I know isn't on the spectrum? Anyway,
Growing up, I felt separated from other people. Maybe not quite an alien, but I felt like I was a different "brand" of human, while most people were different personality flavors of the same human brand (TM, lol) There was a lot about nonverbal communication and verbal communication I didn't understand, \_especially\_ as a kid. I saw how people acted and understood it was the normal , proper way to act. The correct way to act. However, I just, could not, act that way. I think because I was that different "brand" that couldn't really act with quite the same mannerisms. I just had to act in my own ways, just making sure to be kind and pleasant to people.
​
Did anyone else feel that way?
Thank you
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aspergers
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Has anyone on here switched from clomipramine to another drug and found it to help like clomi? Clomi's the only one so far that's helped drastically (and at all) for me but I couldn't stay on it due to serious side effects. I post this often just in hope to find some people with an experience like this, switching to say fluvoxamine successfully after or something like that. I already tried setraline, citalopram, fluoxetine, seroquel, benzos, mirtazapine... and now clomi. Only clomi worked. I hope there's someone with a similiar history who also had to switch but actually got a good experience on a new drug. Thanks for reading.
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OCD
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Harm OCD is one of the scariest feelings ever to me. Sometimes the thoughts, impulses, urges, etc are so disturbing and morbid that it just scares the living daylights out of me. And then sometimes it makes you doubt yourself and it starts to try and make you believe that you want it when it’s the last thing you’d ever want. I started taking Zoloft (25mg) a couple days ago, so I hope that will help, but I just needed to get this out. This shit sucks. And sometimes it’s hard to just say to yourself “It’s only a thought” when the thoughts are as frightening and disturbing as they are. I’ve been getting better at it, but it’s still tough.
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OCD
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Hi y'all! I've been living with OCD for most of my life, but I generally avoid researching my own disorder or engaging with other folks with OCD. Not out of any particular denial of my health or malice towards other sufferers, just that engaging with/being meta about my own health tends to lead me down bad spirals.
Out of morbid curiosity though I decided to check out to see if Reddit had a community for OCD folks, and what it would be like.
The thing that immediately strikes me about this community is the heavy discouragement of the idea of Reassurance. I think I understand the basic logic behind it (not 'feeding the beast' as it were), but at the same time the amount of restrictiveness to the slightest hint of reassurance kind of worries me as an outsider to this community.
It strikes me as a very cold way of dealing with things, from my own anecdotal experience, some of my best progress in dealing with OCD has come from sucking up my pride and letting someone close comfort me when I'd usually let my problems stew silently in my head.
So I'm mainly curious what you guys' take on the matter. What's the scholarly consensus on this type of behaviour and what do you each believe? Have l possibly dealing with my health in a maladaptive way? Could categorically avoiding reassurance cause OCD folks to be cold in their personal relationships??
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OCD
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Hi All,
There are some really amazing Aspie characteristics such as the ability to process information and problem solve, feeling strong emotions, being trustworthy and various others. Sometimes it seems like a gift to me, if it wasn’t for the social problems and extreme emotions.
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aspergers
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Is being out of depression just a constant fight against its symptoms? Are we ever going to be at ease, without having to check ourselves every second? Are we ever going to be free of this?
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depression
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On a daily basis since 2015, I have this constant urge to count letters of specific words in sentences, add them together, break the letters in the word down into numbers by working out what number the letter comes under in the alphabet, add the numbers together then see what the final letter would be.
For example the word 'and' would go like this:
3 letters = 3
A=1, N=14, D=4,
3+1+14+4=22.
Final letter=V because V is the 22nd letter in the alphabet
For words where the overall number is over 26 because there are 26 letters in the alphabet, I'd just go over the alphabet again. For example if after counting the number is 32, the final letter would be F because that's the 6th letter after 26, or if the final number is 55, I'll go over the alphabet again, figure out Z=26, Z=52, then come to 55=C. Does this make sense?
There have been times where I tried not to do it but I have this nagging urge where I have to or I can't function properly until its done lol. Sometimes while someone is talking to me or whatever, I literally can't hear what they're saying until I complete the task. I told my brother about this and he said I have OCD but I'd like to know what people who have been diagnosed with OCD think about this.
Thanks
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OCD
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This strange 'self inhibition' that I have. Its like - if im hungry, I could keep myself from eating till Im nearly starving(if i didnt want to eat). Ill be experiencing the crippling chronic stress from being lonely(due to being isolated) but still keep myself from being around other people.
I remember in high school I had this "enhanced self inhibition / self control" where I could study for hours without having dinner for prolongued periods. The cognitive focus on the studies would just make me completely "Forget" about my hunger.
Its actually kinda causing problems for me now.
Do you also have this feature where you can distract yourself so intensely that you forget about your other needs??
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aspergers
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Does anyone else experience hypersensitivity? Specifically to specific sound(s)?
I often listen to music to drown out the relentless 'noise' caused by overthinking and just the rapid spit fire of thoughts running through my head, and find that sound (music) is a way for me to 'focus' when working on tasks, most of the time.
The other day I somehow got stuck on a loop of songs which literally made me cringe. Perhaps a culmination of pitch, tone and texture... But it was like nails on a calkboard (or equally as disturbing for me is the ice scraper on the car window after a frost).
This experience hit me so hard, I started thinking back if I had ever noticed anything like this before. In fact I had one teacher in middle school that I loathed because her voice just triggered something in me and all I could think about during class was screaming. I am sure there were other instances, but the physical visceral experience of these two experiences was similar.
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ADHD
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I'm in my final year of highschool. All my friends are saying it's fun but I'm not having any. I'm taking computer science and I hate the teacher. He doesn't explain anything and expects us to do it. And there are a few kids who are very good at it and finish very fast. I know people say "people learn at their own pace" but I feel like I'm going to fail horribly. I'm sitting at an 85 only because we did 1 presentation and one assignment which my friend helped me with. I feel like I'm going to fail in university too. We have a new assignment this week and everyone is basically finished. I am still struggling and asked for help but no one is responding. I feel like such an idiot.
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depression
|
DAE turn your note pad or paper 90 degrees to write?
Well apparently thats what i do, my friend just asked me why do you write like that? It looks difficult?
I'm like what do you mean? Well apparently its "weird" ive always written this way i never knew it was "wrong" . Oh well its what i am.
Writing the "normal" way is hard and weird andd i write too sloppy like that.
Is their a ceratin correlation between this and having aspergers?🤷♂️🤔
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aspergers
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I hate that I'm almost 30. I hate that I can't go back a bit and do some things over. I hate that my peers are doing the adult thing and I can't.
I hate my birthday so much because every year is a reminder that I'll be middle-aged even though I'll feel like a 10 year old on a daily basis. Sometimes I just want to crawl into someone's lap and hope I get to age back down so my brain can catch up to my body. Even just holding someone would be nice.
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aspergers
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Hello, long time lurker here thought I would post to get some alternative perspectives. Long story short I have a hard time convincing myself life is worth living. I’ve been on anti depressants and attending counselling (monthly) for 4 years now. I really enjoy the talks I have with my counsellor he gives me lots of tools to use and helps me navigate my mind when I feel lost. With the help of my family and the local Phyciatrist my symptoms were suppressed and I felt able to live my day to day life again without major hiccups.
That being said I was never able to convince myself that life was worth all of it. I have been working really hard on self care these past few years and my family and counsellor say I am in a much better place now and I am really proud of my progress. What I am not proud of is that I still believe that I need to leave. I’ve been working hard at a job where I get to meet new people everyday which is nice as I enjoy meeting new people. I’ve been travelling to various countries, I’ve had what I think are healthy relationships. But for some reason I can’t make that push to the next level where I can be content with waking up in the morning and maybe not think about the alternative all day.
I am still very young (24) and I have lots to learn but in the past few years my experiences have only verified my negative mindset and even with the help of my supportive family and doctors I feel myself getting farther and farther away from believing in myself and others.
I’m not really sure what I’m looking for by posting this but i am curious if other people share this mindset or if anyone has experience transitioning from this mindset. Do the thoughts ever go away? Is this just how everyone feels? Am I doing this to myself somehow? I don’t know …..
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depression
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I have dealt with textbook depression for nearly my whole life.
My sister had interests, depth, and passion growing up but just didn't. And I have been struggling against the consequences of a lifetime of depressive habits for years, since I recognized them for what they are.
But recognizing these habits did not make them easier to break, it feels like it tightened their grip and made them more ominous.
No interests, short attention span, isolating because I am too sad a sack to desire company. It's too painful! For me and for the company!
I am at my wits end with this, but in the classic, major depressive form, it is a dull, chronic ache, that has whittled me down over time. Few big booms. Nothing movie worthy. Just dull, and slow, and gray.
After a suicide attempt three years ago, I got sober, felt a new lease on life. That lasted for 8 months and I felt like things were finally happening, the stone was shifting. But I made one too many decisions which strayed from the path, and it all fell the fuck apart.
So I went back to school after failing a years worth of classes 4 years ago. It is not going well. I have made the decision to drop everything before I fail. A withdrawal is better than an F. I need to get it together before next semester. What is wrong with me?
So, all that is running through my head these last few days is that it's game over for me. I do not have a suicide plan, I will not attempt, but in a spiritual sense, an eternal return sense, I feel it's game over. This is a rant. What do I do with a lifetime of depressive habits? Anyway here is a poem:
where is my God
when I’m laying in bed,
and denying, denying
the ravishing red
that steals my vision
and fills my head
with malignant visions of doubt?
where is my God
while I’m trying to find
a meaningful word
or a note, or a line,
that begets from my lips,
and is only mine,
emerging from the divine?
Where is my God?
I find her, by chance,
Through the passing of time
or a song, or a dance,
Or the prose of a master,
Braving foreign lands,
Walking with me,
Hand in hand
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depression
|
tw: death
i lost my mom this past february due to a stroke. it was very sudden and came out of no where. before i started zoloft shes all i could think about. my brain would tell me she’s alive and that i should call her. i would see her in the hospital bed where i held her hand, i see her in her casket. i told my psychiatrist about all the thoughts i was having (and it’s actually how he came about diagnosing me with ocd) and that’s when he put me on zoloft. i’ve been doing a lot better since starting it but i had a bad day today and all the thoughts are back. i know that denial is a part of grieving, but fuck i’m just trying to go to sleep.
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OCD
|
Since I was a teenager, (I’m 26 now) I got really into self improvement and kinda stayed in that world till now. I always felt like I was “missing” something and then I got diagnosed adhd earlier this year and I realized the thing I was “missing” was probably dopamine & norepinephrine. I’ve tried everything to “become better” and things have helped a lot. Mediation/fasting/exercise/yoga/books/breathing practices.. etc. I’ve learned a lot & it’s wonderful. But I feel like I’m just the observer of my life sometimes. It’s like I’m thinking/in my head all the time UNLESS I’m doing intense physical exercise or when I’m on the right meds, or when I’m doing an “adrenaline” activity. And it sucks. Because I genuinely like people & being social but it’s hard for me because I get stuck in my head too much & it’s hard to interact. And it’s annoying because I’ve practiced these things. I know thoughts or just thoughts, and you just have to allow them to pass without judgement. And I’m able to do that a lot. But other times it’s impossible… I feel like there’s a glass wall around me & I’m just observing life through it rather then being in it. Then I’m thinking well, possibly the medication isn’t working, or making it worse? Who knows. It’s time to exercise now lol
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ADHD
|
Hello everyone. I'm looking for some criticisms of Autism Speaks with citations of some sort that I can use to educate others about the problems this organization causes/promotes. Thank you very much for all your help!
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aspergers
|
My doctor said i could not be diagnosed because i suffer from moderate depression. He gave me two options; start a new MAOI medication or go to Electroconvulsive therapy. I said i dont want to try new medication because i have suffered trought 8 of them, they dont work on me.
I dont want to go to electroconvulsive therapy because of the risk what it can do to memory. I know i have ADHD, i have all the signs just like my father who is diagnosed. Doctors dont seem to understand that maybe the ADHD could be playing a big role why i have depression. Im so angry. And my country Finland should have the ”best healthcare” in the wolrd. What a joke. Thanks for reading my rant.
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ADHD
|
Hiii uhmm just a quick question I took off meds last month because I'm kinda feeling well, and now that it's back to school I'm worried that it might come back. Can I take meds again if it does?? Plss answerr thank u !
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OCD
|
Anyone have same repeat ocd fears? Like they are the same ones over in a pattern? Some of them I have not had in months and than they pop up again? I tell myself if they have been dormant for a while they can't be real but than I'll hear something or see something and then it's retriggered?
Also does anyone else read some bad news about someone and than picture that happening to them and than fear it will happen?
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OCD
|
TW: mentions about physical, emotional, and sexual abuse
I’m pretty sure I have PTSD. If I do then it was caused by my dads physical and mental abuse. When ever I hear about child abuse or abuse in general I get a little shaky and I start to feel nauseous. I sorta get similar reactions to hearing about rape but I don’t shake and instead I feel a little light headed. I don’t remember the abuse so I don’t know if I was raped by him or another (though I don’t think he’s the type to do that sorta thing) Are these reactions to hearing about rape normal?
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ptsd
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Advice? Complex PTSD, haven’t slept a full night I a few nights. I was up all night last night walking and exercising to kill time. On Zoloft 100mg which may be causing it.
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ptsd
|
Hi, I (15F) go to a voc-tech school and this week I had an exploratory cycle in Culinary Arts because you explore 7 shops before you pick one. Today I was in the restaurant kitchen. The students run it and it is open to the public. Now, my older brother has ADHD and take meds for it, we don't know our biological family's medical history bc we adopted. I realize as I get older I show a lot of his same symptoms and ones unique to me (he is super hyperactive, I am more of a combo). I've been trying to convince my mom to test me but she is hesitant because she doesn't think I need that "label." ya anyway today I was on the fryer station and we were getting a busy load, breading and frying mozarella sticks, pickles, chicken, two different fries, crab rangoons, etc. and I was convinced I was going to f\*ckin DIE. and out of nowhere my ADHD was like "I got this one fam" and I became a fucking god for a few hours. I was breading with one hand, moving baskets, frying, going to the freezer to grab supplies, absolutely everything except keeping track of tickets. like the pressure was actually comforting bc i could go into a nice special zone and Do The Thing That I Needed To Do. it was wild and im very pleasantly surprised. does anyone know why tf that happened
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ADHD
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I’ve been super low on meds so I’ve been rationing until I get my script refilled (long story). I’m so tired of being tired. I’m exhausted 24/7. I’m a skater and I don’t even want to just hang out at the park let alone skate. No amount of caffeine helps :/ this just needed to get it off my chest. Like why me, I’m 22…I manage a restaurant and have all these goals and dreams but this damn adhd constantly puts up road blocks for me
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ADHD
|
I was doing better with my ocd but recently started noticing when I’m meditating or sitting in silence I’m just getting random mind pops, mostly thoughts (snippets of songs, random words, thought of a random sound). When I close my eyes and try to meditate it’s just random mental images.
I’m not hearing these externally it’s just like my internal dialogue or remembering it in somebody else’s voice, like you’d remember a song.
I’m really exhausted, I have schiz OCD and it’s just completely de-railed my life over the last 5 months because these are pretty real symptoms. Will bring it up to my psychiatrist but wondering if anybody else has spoken to a doctor about it
Thank you
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OCD
|
lately (for the past 2 weeks) ive barely slept a night more than 5 hours. im confused. i feel happy on the surface but it doesn’t feel genuine. i havent been eating unless i feel like im starving where ill start to overeat at around midnight. im sad and lonely, i dont have any friends and havent since last year. i wanna make new friends but i no longer know how and my social anxiety only makes it worse. i dont know what to do, i would really appreciate some guidance because therapy doesn’t seem to work.
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depression
|
Hey, I'm new here bc I was recently diagnosed (20 M) I've been taking Strattera for a month and while it boosted my mood and helped me think calmer, I did notice my HR was faster but I felt it was nothing to worry about. However, I was still having a hard time concentrating so my doctor kept me on Strattera but added 10mg of Adderall on my last visit. I've noticed my workouts are now limited by shortness of breath and an urge to throw up after basic exercises that I had no problem with before. I bought an apple watch today for the HR monitor (I've been contemplating getting it for a while now but what seemed to be a fast HR pressured me to get it faster) and it was saying my HR was 110 while just resting. Is this normal for starting Adderall or should I quit now?Should I stop Strattera and see if Adderall still causes problems? I've only been on Adderall for 3 days. Thanks.
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ADHD
|
I’m just made fun about it and I need to know if I’m in the wrong
|
ptsd
|
From what I have noticed on this forum and other forums on the internet related to Asperger's, I see a lot of Aspies who are in their twenties and don't have a driver's license. When I turned 16, I had no desire to get my license.
For most kids who turn 16, learning to drive is a major desire for them. I did not get my license when I was 16 nor did I get my temps when I turned 15 and a half. I didn't get my temps until I was 17 and I didn't get my license until I was almost 18. Even when I got my temps and license when I was 17, it still didn't feel right to me. I still wasn't than keen on driving when I was 17.
This was before I was ever diagnosed so I had no idea at the time what was wrong with me and why I had no desire to drive when most people my age were driving to school and had their own car. It took me 3 times to pass my temporary license test which was a written test on the computer and it took me 3 times to pass my actual driving test with a driving instructor.
I've been driving for over 10 years now and I've never gotten into an accident. I would say that having Asperger's makes me a better driver because I obey all the traffic laws and I'm aware of my surroundings because I pay attention to detail. I know not to drink and drive and I know not to text while driving. I wouldn't say that I'm a perfect driver, but I've seen a lot of crazy drivers out there. I worry more about someone hitting me than me hitting another driver or a pedestrian. There have been times where I have almost gotten into an accident but that was because of other drivers who weren't paying attention.
|
aspergers
|
So I’ve had 4 jobs in the past 2 months, and now I am attempting an apprenticeship at a piercing shop near me. I don’t know why it’s so goddamn hard for me to keep a job. They’ve basically already told me, within the three days I’ve had this apprenticeship, that if I can’t work on being more social and personable then they’re gonna cut me loose. I know the manager dislikes me. I just feel like an alien everywhere I go, as badass as I think it would be to be a professional piercer there’s a big part of me that thinks I’d be wasting my time by showing up later today because I know I literally cannot be anymore social. Any opinions?
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aspergers
|
Occasionally I have these kind of obsessions and subsequent compulsive thoughts. It's so awful. I haven't had it in awhile, but it just came back to me. Any advice?
|
OCD
|
Creating my own thoughts
Is it normal to create your own intrusive thoughts about your fears??
I have been creating scenarios in my head to see if it makes me anxious. So my fear is schizophrenia so you can imagine the kind of OCD and anxiety ridden thoughts I have about it and everything. I’ve read so much on the Illness that I have honestly engraved it in my wiring of my brain.
So for example I’ll have a what if thought about a future event so say tonight when I’m in my bed I’ll think “what if I’m lying in my bed and I think what if i start to think people are watching me, listening to me” this creates anxiety about a situation that I might not do when I’m lying In my bed. So it’s like I’m setting up my anxiety to hit me as soon as I lie in bed because it’ll end up triggering that thought because I’ve thought about it. Does anyone else do this? Create thoughts in their head that scare you so much because of your anxiety/ocd fear?
Thanks,
Brandon
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OCD
|
*I haven't been diagnosed with ADHD, but I show symptoms of brain damage/dementia/ADHD. I think, I am losing sanity day by day*
Worst thing, I have ever done is write my roll number wrong 4 times.
I am 23 and currently pursuing law internship. I made11 a mistake on Friday and I repeated the same mistake today. I have 0 controls over my actions and after doing something stupid, I realise I have done it incorrectly.
1. I can't find files in an office.
2. I make same mistakes.
3. I can't understand what is being told to me, basically can't process information. I think. It's due to my IQ of 84.
4. I can't follow simple instructions.
5. I am utterly hopeless and feel so dumb.
|
ADHD
|
I’ve had OCD for years. It comes and it goes and the obsession and compulsions have changed many times over the years. From being scared of bacteria to harm OCD to different forms of Pure O to ROCD etc.
Recently I’ve started obsessing over health related stuff, very much like I’d assume hypochondriacs do. It’s new to me, but it still reminds me of my OCD. I’m still confused whether this is OCD or something else.
Anyone else had OCD focus on health / disease / googling symptoms etc?
|
OCD
|
I’m just tired of hearing the same things over me over.
“It’ll get better.”
“It’s okay not to be okay.”
“Be grateful for what you have.”
“Other people have it worse than you.”
I wish that those words did make me feel better. But nothing will. The circumstances that I’m in makes it impossible for me to be happy. I’m so tired of it all. I’m tired of just existing. I just want the lights to go out and never come back on. I’m tired of existing. I just want all this pain to disappear. Most of all, I’m just tired of crying to the point if there being no more tears coming down my face.
|
depression
|
I know that perfectionism goes hand in hand with ocd or is a part of it. Does every little thing have to be perfect in your mind? Is something not good enough to you unless it is 100% flawless? I struggle with the perfectionism aspect of OCD. Whenever I make a mistake, I make a bigger deal out of it than it is. I am aware that I am not perfect and that nobody or nothing in this world is perfect, but my ocd brain just can't accept that. Whenever I accidentally break something, get a stain on something, or damage an item in any way. even if the damage is minor, I spend so much time trying to fix the item and constantly checking it to make sure it looks better. If I have no progress, I keep checking the item and keep trying to fix it. If I have no success, then I look online to see if there are any services that specialize in fixing items that I have damaged. I will either spend money to have the item fixed if there are services that specialize in fixing the particular item that I am trying to fix, or I order a replacement item even if the item that I am replacing still works because I don't like to see any flaws or damage whatsoever on an item. This is how bad my OCD is. I have also struggled with intrusive thoughts as well as problems of letting go of items. OCD is a nightmare and it is also costly.
|
OCD
|
RN mine is Weezer - Freak Me Out
And I'm at work so I can't listen to anything real.
Just what's in my head.
YOU CAME OUT OF NOWHERE, MAN, YOU REALLY FREAK ME OUT, I'M SO AFRAID OF YOU AND WHEN I LOSE MY COOL, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I KNOW YOU DON'T MEAN NO HAAAARM, YOU'RE JUST DOING YOUR THING. BUT, MAN, YOU REALLY FREAK ME OUT. (did I hurt you? are you okay?...)
|
ptsd
|
Hey all, for context I've had OCD for a very long time and for the most part it's been about very morbid or disturbing things that make me very uncomfortable about myself, but recently I think I've been having an obsession that's a bit milder but still aggravating.
Recently I've been obsessing over whether I can actually know or prove anything, either from my own experience or even with reason, and I've been obsessively looking up proofs of basic facts about the world (that the earth revolves around the sun, that the Pythagorean theorem is true, that atoms exist, etc.), and usually my brain overthinks it to the point where I'm right back where I started.
This definitely isn't as frightening as my usual obsessions, but it's still unnerving and it's becoming a bit intrusive in my daily routine, as I'm forced to constantly obsess over whether the information that someone says is really actually true and whether we can genuinely prove it.
I know this might sound really really dumb, I'm just wondering if anyone here has experienced this kind of obsession themselves and whether the would classify it as OCD.
Thanks for any answers.
|
OCD
|
While it is true that we try to integrate with society unlike other types of autistic people, I often find myself saying things I know will hurt, annoy or just generally bother people, when I can easily just stay quiet. Why do I keep doing this??
|
aspergers
|
I'm a piece of fucking human trash and I wish I were dead. I can't do anything right and I'm a waste of space. I want to jump off my balcony into the trash bin below, that's where I belong. I'm so fucking sick of myself. 26 years old and never done anything right. I'm just a constant fuck up and I hate my essence
|
depression
|
So my (23F) younger brother (15M) has ADHD. I’d like to preface that he’s otherwise mature for his age and is a very kind person. I’d also like to say that I know ADHD is a valid reason for a lot of things. But I do feel like he uses his ADHD to his advantage sometimes and as an excuse not to come up with or try a solution.
For example, he’ll always forget to do his chores or put them off until the last minute (he’s told me himself that he does this sometimes). This is frustrating because it affects everyone else in the house. He helps me clean the kitchen and when he doesn’t do his part, I can’t do mine and it’s overwhelming for multiple reasons (parents get annoyed which ruins the tone in the house, there’s a ton of dishes that don’t end up in the dishwasher because it’s full, I end up having to do dishes late at night etc). When he’s not avoiding the chore he just forgets.
I’ve done a little research on ADHD and try my best to understand it so I can give him solutions. But where I’m having the real problem is that he’s not willing to try any of the solutions I mention or even come to a compromise. I recommended setting reminders on the Alexa or his phone, but his excuse is he “doesn’t like alarms because they’re annoying”. I tried reminding him myself but he either doesn’t listen or tells me off because he says he’s less likely to do it when I remind him, especially if I remind him multiple times (which he needs because he doesn’t do it if I only remind him once). He says he’s tried the wristband method (I’ve never seen him wear them or get anything done though) I’ve even tried just not saying anything to him about it in the off chance that helps. I treated him like an adult when no one else would take him seriously in the off chance he’ll at least try. It lasted a week and now it’s worse than before. The only thing that actually works is if our mum tells him to do it because her telling him to do something is the only time it matters apparently.
The only thing I haven’t done was get my parents involved because I’m unsure how they’d respond or how to say it. Plus I don’t want to screw up our sibling relationship since we’re close. But this is starting to stress me out (I’m autistic and this is one of those things where we just clash. It’s getting stressful). I feel like he’s taking advantage of how lenient I am and how he wouldn’t snitch to our parents. I’m almost tempted to just clean the entire kitchen myself every day so that it’s done faster and earlier, but that doesn’t teach him problem solving.
Those who might have been in the same situation or have experience. What can I do?
EDIT: Grammar. And also I’ve tried reminding him in front of our parents in the hopes that the little extra pressure will encourage him to do it more. But he just gets sneakier then angry at me. So I don’t do that anymore
|
ADHD
|
I have a friend who's been diagnosed with OCD along with other mental disorders since the quarantine began. Since they told me, I'm always worried that there might be questions I shouldn't ask them to not trigger them. I noticed things related to religion can trigger them, although I have so many questions for them and to know them more on a deeper level I avoided asking literally anything related to religion.
Recently, they asked me something related to religion and I was surprised because they were totally fine with it. Yesterday, I asked them back but my question was on a very specific topic, and they answered me with "Sorry, I can't answer this question, it triggers my OCD."
I felt lost because I was wondering if just the question itself triggered them or not? if yes, then how can I know what triggers them without directly asking them? They told me they aren't feeling good today and my brain immediately went back to yesterday, I wonder if it's because of my question.
(English isn't my native language, sorry for any mistakes)
|
OCD
|
So I’ve been on Vyvanse and switched to xaggitin as it stopped working. When I was on Vyvanse I would have experience lack of hunger which is pretty common but Xaggitin doesn’t have the same side effect on me. At least not to the same extent which I’m pleased about because it makes it easier to care for my body but has anyone else experienced the same? I usually hear the opposite and I know the side effect is listed on my leaflet and has been mentioned by my psychiatrist so I’m a little confused
|
ADHD
|
Does anyone have advice on how to stop face picking?
|
OCD
|
For back story: 15 years ago an ex forced me to do things, videotaped them, and then threatened to send the videos to people if i broke up with him. In the end I broke up with him, and he did send the video out.
Now for today's dilemma. About 6 months ago, I was in a relationship with someone I met in a game online. Things were good at first, but he quickly became manipulative. So I broke up with him. We both still play the game but haven't talked since about 4 months ago. The break up seemed amicable, we just realized we couldn't be friends and went our separate ways.
Today, someone we both know messaged me. Apparently the guy I had dated was sending a picture of my face to people I don't know, and telling them all that we talk, that I say I love him, among other things.
It's not the same as what my ex 15 years ago did, but its brought up similar feelings of helplessness. I've had flashbacks from the original incident since finding out, and I've been panicky all day as well.
The guy we both know said to forget about it. Pretend it didn't happen and move on with my life, but he doesn't understand. He doesn't understand why it's so upsetting for me. I just don't even know what to do, I don't even want to play the game anymore even though I enjoyed it for over a year.
|
ptsd
|
I am not sure how to feel about this. It might be something from my head and I might be just over reacting, but I feel like something is off.
I work in an office of a big company in the travel industry. The company has a few smaller offices around the world - I work at one of those smaller offices. The “main” office is based in Miami, where management works.
I’ve been with this company for 4 years already. Management seems to like me. The CEO likes me as well. To make things a bit easier, I told my direct boss about my diagnosis right after I was hired. A couple of months ago, I told management (from the Miami main office) and the CEO about it as well and they were very understanding.
We are all very open about ourselves in our office, after all, we are in 5, right now. I work in person on Mondays and Tuesdays, and work from home the rest of the week. A couple of weeks ago I nonchalantly mentioned about my Asperger’s, as I was working from home before. As we started to have in-person interactions, I thought it would be best to let the rest of the team know about it. One of my colleagues has a background in psychology, and he really understood that. Other colleagues were also understanding, and nothing really changed. The thing is: one of my colleagues is treating me somewhat differently, I think. I can’t really place my finger on it, but there is something in the way she talks to me that changed. It feels like she kinda baby talks me, or that she is talking to a child. I really can’t place my finger on it, but I know something is different. The thing is: I don’t really know if she always talks like a pre-school teacher, or if she really is treating me differently. And I really don't know how to handle this situation. If I mention that to someone else I will create a very uncomfortable situation in the office - either by being "right" (as in, she is treating me differently), or "wrong" (as in, she is not treating me differently at all and she really talks like that). What do I do? :C
|
aspergers
|
I know this may be an unpopular opinion but I don't see the point in people rioting or protesting. I am not downgrading the severe problem we have with racism, I am simply confused. A lot of us have also suffered from people making us feel less significant, and made fun of for our different behaviors. Yet we more or less stay silent. Are we waiting for a chance to finally stop the bullying, stop the sadness that people have caused us. Or are we just going to do nothing and simply endure the pain.
|
aspergers
|
To me, lying, all lying, falls under blanket of "untrustworthy behavior" and it's hard for me to see past that in social groups or with friends (dating is a different ballgame).
It must be hard to see the nuances of "being false" as a part of social interactions (to spare feelings, etc) when all lying is suspect.
To NT *not* "lying" is suspect behavior.
We are each others villans in this.
|
aspergers
|
My chest feels so heavy just thinking about typing this out but I feel so trapped in my mind right now I’m hoping it might help to get it all out and maybe hear from people with similar experiences?
Basically I was trapped in an emotionally (and a couple times physically) abusive marriage to a narcissist for 8 years. I was blinded by the fog, completely isolated and so easily manipulated by him. Every time I started thinking I wanted out he started talking about suicide, so I stayed. .I hate myself for that. Anyways, I finally started to see through that fog and was wanting out whatever way I could. I met with a lawyer on a Wednesday morning, and late that Wednesday night/early Thursday morning he attacked me. He woke me up with a slap in the face and pointed a gun at me. Without going through the gory details, I’ll just put that I finally got to call 911, grab my kids and run. He died that morning, suicide by cop.
This happened early this year, and it seems like I’ve been going downhill mentally since. I lay down wide awake at night, feeling paralyzed and watching it all happen again like it’s a movie scene. I can’t seem to make myself get up or shake myself out of it when it happens. I can’t make it stop until it plays through or I end up in a panic attack. It seems as if minute by minute there’s more intrusive thoughts that I can’t keep out of my head. I have to pull over while driving to collect myself. My throat closes and I feel like I can’t get any air into my lungs. I’m terrified to go to sleep most nights, but can’t stand being awake either. I have nightmares of it happening again, or alternative endings to what actually happened, him coming back, etc. I’m depressed, overwhelmed, angry, irritable, and some days I can’t stand being in my own body.
I don’t know what this is that I’m going through or if it belongs here, but I’m desperate to find out if it’s ever going to end or lessen in severity. How long am I going to feel like I’m - prisoner in my own mind?
|
ptsd
|
done dealing with my brain. Dealt with social anxiety my whole life which leads to me being depressed and that mix of hating myself and being scared of other people hating me doesn’t make it easy to talk to people. i don’t tell anyone about my feelings because i don’t want to be a burden. cant even tell my parents because my mom says im overreacting and my dad tells me i need to man up.
went to the doctor once and got prescribed prozac but my mom shamed me for taking them and i was scared of the side effects so i stopped after 2 days.
over the last few months things have just gotten so much worse and i don’t think i can keep living this way. i want to try prozac again but a lot of people say it wont help without therapy? i cant really afford therapy and i dont want to ask my parents for it.
what really changes with your thoughts and emotions when you start prozac or ssris?
|
depression
|
In light of posts about EF difficulties.
The lab I'm working for suggested I should do a short abstract for a conference coming up. And the deadline is in...less than two months.
They suggested an easy enough topic, mainly an exploratory analysis. Instead of just running in blind, I'll need to spend some time reading (bad at doing, bad at scheduling...). After, do analyses to see if we find anything worthwhile. After, write up the short abstract. Submit.
So...in light of the fact that I (A) still have job duties, (B) have a separate thesis I want to get published by October, and (C) don't have much time to begin with, what do you suppise might be a good game plan? (talking about it's easier than doing it...)
I'm thinking: spend 2 weeks prioritizing reading. Conflicts with my want to read up on a certain topic more (which I...wasn't doing to begin with!). Spend 2 weeks working on analyses. Spend 2 weeks writing it up. Last 2 weeks on editing, reading to fill in certain blanks. That's it. Sound doable?
What are things I can do to make those two week intervals more "productive"? Preferably simple-but-intuitive solutions.
|
aspergers
|
I was diagnosed with PTSD about 3 years ago. I take a combination of antidepressants for it that help to a degree. I've been managing well enough but in the past few weeks my nightmares have reached a new level. I'm never rested and I dread being asleep. My dr prescribed xanax to help me sleep but it made it worse. Does anyone have any experience with this? What worked for you?
|
ptsd
|
I have been feeling this abnormal cortisol response for a while. Shout out to my people who only feel ok during times of panic like me, who when the pandemic started I felt normal? I actually felt better when I could hide my face in a socially acceptable way.
Anyway, I feel like I'm finally starting to do a better job. I'm getting drunk less to deal with it. I'm starting to feel like I might live more than one year into the future. Does this end in a good way? I'm not sure.
I don't feel better. I am existing. I feel alone. I seem better.
|
ptsd
|
TW: Child abuse, CSA
Just as a short backstory: My mom was severely abusive to me and my sister in every way you could think of. Physically, emotionally, even sexually. She went to prison when I was 10 for child abuse and aggravated sexual assault, but was recently released.
I thought I was fine for a while. I was pretty much totally dissociated from my trauma and I thought it barely affected me. That is, until my mom was released and tried to contact me and weasel her way back into our lives. Suddenly, my intrusive thoughts which were manageable before became unbearable.
It's just so frustrating because I thought I was completely removed from my past, I thought it didn't affect me. I even thought I was getting better. But then it all came crashing down in under a week.
I'm back on medication, and going to therapy so I have some stability in my life, but it all just fucking sucks.
|
OCD
|
hi im isabelle, well ive never struggled with ocd or ever thought of it. but back in november 2020 i had a traumatic experience in the hospital.. i had trouble breathing and i obsessed over my breathing for months and got over it
then this year its been months and i obsessed over my tongue. for some reason i have a stupid fear of it being numb, like it feels like its not there and i have to bite it and touch it all the time. while talking while watching tv anything. and it gives me so much anxiety
the worst is when i have to go out, my boyfriend is very kind and understands my problem. but i feel so miserable :/ like i will never get over this irrational thing.. i also strugglr with swallowing alot accompanied by all of this..
how can i overcome this? do i sit through the uncomfortableness? its so hard to ignore i keep thinking that theres something wrong with me
ive cried so much over it i just want to be normal again.. i forgot what it was like to be my normal relaxed self.
ive tried confronting it and my anxiety flares up like crazy and it just feels like ill pass out or go crazy its so weird
|
OCD
|
Hi everyone, not sure if anyone else has done this, but I'm experimenting with using low-impact tasks and to-dos to distract myself from trauma and move through moments when I feel immobilized and overwhelmed. For example, one morning last week I had a bad episode where I was experiencing all these bad memories from over the past two years of school and work. I was having trouble getting started on work at my current job, and I decided to go into my HR portal to request time off for the holidays. That was the most low-key work-related thing I could do, and it actually served to jump-start me to a point where it no longer felt like a huge burden to overcome inertia and get on with the day.
Most of my trauma cannot be addressed in the moment when it rears its head, so I find it important to find ways to move through things (like work, chores, etc.) until a time when I can unpack it in a more conducive and controlled environment.
Has anyone else found success doing this, and if so, how?
|
ptsd
|
I just saw a video about maladaptive daydreaming and how it is commonly seen in people with disorders like ADHD. They said it was when your daydreaming is on purpose and really elaborate, but then it also causes distress. Now, I have some pretty darn elaborate daydreaming sessions, and if I'm bored and have no one to talk to, I'm gonna be in my dream world for sure. I've even explored some NSFW activities in my daydreams when I was going through puberty lol. However, I don't think it gets in the way of my daily life because I only do it when it is appropriate, and I can switch back to doing whatever if needed like if I'm at work or something because I was a cashier who couldn't leave the register. I guess I just wanted to see what you guys do, if you have imaginary societies in your head and do you think you have problematic daydreaming or if it's just fine.
TLDR: I daydream like maladaptive daydreamers, but it doesn't get in the way of everyday life. What do you guys do or think?
|
ADHD
|
Since I was around 11 I’ve struggled with the feeling of being inpure. I was very curious about sex and stuff like that, but everytime I thought about sexual things, I felt disgusted with myself. The past few years I’ve just felt like I’m a horrible person, that I’m a pedo, a devil, a narcissist and that I’ve ruined past friends’ lives. I also have a weird mindset about time and productivity. If I don’t spend every waking moment doing something productive, I’m a failure. You could say I’m a perfectionist.
I’ve talked with several proffessionals, but I’m not good at remembering what I actually struggle with, so I don’t get much out of the sessions. I’m also afraid that I’ll try to over-compensate when I do open up more.
Could I just be overthinking it?
Note:
I just recently learned that OCD is not what stereotypes make it out to be. I don’t know much about it.
|
OCD
|
To anybody struggling, you can do this!
Embrace your anxiety. It may seem contradictory at first, but running away from your anxiety only makes it worse. It's ok to not fully recover in one day, weeks, or months, take it one step at a time and pace yourself.
Everybody is different and every recovery process is different, but remember to embrace and love, you do not have fear your anxiety.
|
OCD
|
So when i meet somone new and i like that Person i often find interest. As in - alot of chatting, wanting to meet up and do stuff together etc... sometimes that feeling goes away suddenly and i know it was a hyperfixiation and somtimes it stays i realize its a crush.
Because of that i am afraid to "try" something with somone because i dont wanna hurt them. And on the other hand i have heared multiple times that i always behave like i just want to be friends with somone.
How do i handle this?
Or how do i know if it is a crush or a hyperfixiation?
|
ADHD
|
im a 23 year old guy, from outside I look to be doing good.
I got a close friend groep, good relations with my family.
I been working construction for 1.5 year and I'm very good at it and the people I work with tell me I'm learning exceptionaly quick and that I have a natural talent for it.
people al the time think I'm 30 because I'm smart and mature.
some girls I'm friends with told me I'm decent to pretty good looking.
people say I'm very funny.
people compliment my parents that there son is great and some of my friends told me that they look up to me.
but ever sinds I started to deal with depression when I was about 16 every new year has been the worst year of my life.
im losing al interest in the things and people I used to love.
my days are empty and I feel like I'm just sitting out my time.
I not enjoying food and everyday eating feels like a hard task.
I'm insecure about myself and I'm building up a crazy social anxiety.
getting a girlfriend feels impossible and like it wil never happen .
I'm building up unhealthy drug habits.
I feel like I can't do this for much longer anymore and I don't know what to do about it.
I tried therapy and I don't think it wil be able to help me.
I feel like this wil never get better.
I hope I wil find the strength to kill myself sometime.
but I know I wil ether magicly find the solution someday or I wil just suffer until I die old and miserable.
I don't know why I'm posting this but here it is, thanks for reading if someone actually does.
|
depression
|
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