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The whole day I just think it's like an explosion of thoughts. It's not that I hate it it's just awkward to be not able to stop to think.
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aspergers
|
I sleep all day just because I don’t want to be awake, I go to work and just go through the motions, I get home and just sit by myself and wonder what the point of being here anymore is, none of my friends hit me up or want to hang out, anytime I try to talk to someone they act like everything I have to say is beneath them, the past few days have been super hard and all that crosses my mind is suicide, I know there’s still a reason to live but I can’t figure out what it is, and im starting to lose that vision, I just don’t have any motivation to be here or do anything, all I really want is a friend that I can talk to, I don’t why that’s too much for me to ask for, I haven’t had a sober night in over a year, it’s just hard to not be high or drunk anymore, I just don’t know where im going or what to do anymore.
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depression
|
So my main compulsion is googling things, like for example if I think I’ve accidentally inhaled oven cleaner and am dying I will spend hours googling looking for reassurance and reading stories of other people who have thought the same. I’m trying to stop doing this, but I know that reading stories about the thing you’re scared of can also be good exposure. So how do I know the difference between googling as a compulsion and googling as exposure?
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OCD
|
This is a multi-sub poll. I'll compile the results when I'm done with all of the results. Thank you for contributing. :)
[View Poll](https://www.reddit.com/poll/lt43g1)
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OCD
|
I never had therapy before because I don’t I’m to scared to speak to someone about these immoral intrusive thoughts and I can’t afford it either. But I saw some stuff on Quora about people doing exposure therapy for OCD. HOW?? I will never carry out accepting those dark thoughts as a part of me!!!!! ITS DISGUSTING. Everyone would disown me if I told people about what my thoughts are. I feel like a monster when I sit down at night just listening to all these thoughts like it’s a audiobook. Sometimes they’re louder than the sounds right in front of me
|
OCD
|
When I'm awake I stare into space. I don't want to do anything. I'm alone but I'm too afraid to go anywhere. If I get sick it's over for me. I just wish things would get better
|
depression
|
I have contamination ocd. I was just starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel. I was just starting to feel "okay" again.
Then my mom comes home from work. (I stay at her trailer with my 4 year old son since the shut down).
She states that her boss tested positive corona.
She has the option to stay at her boyfriends, just down the street. But instead she INSISTS on seeing my son EVERY OTHER DAY. I don't even get 24 hours between seeing her. She insists on cuddling, kissing, touching, sitting with my son...because I have nowhere else to go I have to endure this. I feel as if my son is just her little pet play thing. She insists its for his development, that he needs her also. But by her coming here she is increasing the chance that my son or I could be without each other. Cause she could expose us and possibly kill us both. She insists this level of "before covid" normalcy.......she acts like covid isn't even here. She changes her bedding maybe every other month. Does things like puts her dirty work bags right onto her bed, and wonders why I don't want my son in her room, in her blankets laying with her. She DEMANDS to see him daily. Be with him. And I don't nave any leg to stand on because she supports us.
She comes here straight from work in dirty work clothes and gets MAD at me when I BEG her to change her clothes or GOD FORBID SHOWER...
She has disgusting habits and ADMITTED to showering once a week. She ONLY cleans HERSELF or anything else and only practices clean habits IF I literally BEG AND NAG AT HER until she is annoyed with me. Its like talking to a teenager. I get met with yelling, nasty words, screaming in front of my kid because I DEMAND a higher standard of clendleness from her. Because of my son..she acts like I AM RIDICULOUS for asking "so much" of her.....asking her to be clean and practice being clean... she acts like im asking her to sacrifice.
Why would I want a dirty nasty person around him?!
She does not do the same things I do to stay healthy . She does not sanitize and clean how i do.
I understand that its her home...and I stay here and she pays the bills.
But should I really be forced to have my son be exposed because of this? I feel like the Truman show. I feel like im under her dome, with her watching me.
How do I tell her to STAY AWAY from us.
Is it wrong for me to tell her to stay away?! That do not want her touching my son or even being around her?
I called my grandma and my grandma yelled at me and told me "im old and lived my life why should I care if we all die"
And it really made me feel like nobody in my family even cares about covid.
My grandma said "well if we all die atleast we all die together".....and I simply do not want to drink the Kool aid.
Its frightening to think that they do not care.
Its nearly neglegent and homicidal to think that way.
Makes me feel like NOBODY in my family is even protecting themselves.
Makes me feel like they are all dirty.
|
OCD
|
When I was a kid. My mother used to get angry randomly and all of the sudden.
She was screaming that loud that my ears where ringing.
I was a little boy chased by a fat lady with a wooden stick and sometimes with a knife when I was enforcing her.
Most of the times I could jump out of the window or
Lock the bath room.
Sometime she got me and beat me up.
I remember her smile when she was beating me.
She said that beating is from God given and is therefore coming from heaven.
After some time she was getting normal and was starting to cry, apologize for her mistakes and warn me that mothers beat and also love their children.
What the fuck was wrong with her?
|
depression
|
Hey all, I've been dealing with dissociation and flashbacks for 3 years. How do I move past this? I cannot live like this.
|
ptsd
|
I love my son. I was in abusive relationship with his father 13 years. My son is 12 now, and we divorced when he was 10. I basically raised him alone, as my partner wasn't interested.
However, today... I see my son looking a bit more like my ex. I've seen a few expressions, I don't know. And makes me feel so so so so scared. I'm not triggered, but scares me a lot. Sometimes makes me sick. I know it's something horrible to say, but I literally get stomachaches out of being worried and scared. And I know it's irrational, since, of course, they will look at least a bit similar. Obviously, it's not his fault and he's awesome. I just can't help myself or my body reactions (I have NEVER said anything to him or make him notice in any way this, of course)
Any advice would be appreciated :(
|
ptsd
|
Suffering from HOCD I was just walking through the house with my brother behind me and felt nervous and then I had precum. I think I should just end my life now.
|
OCD
|
Thinking is hell. The understanding in the back of your mind, constantly knowing why the world is fucked and that there is no way to truly fix it because human nature is flawed. The feeling of hopelessness and futility that comes with completing mundane but mandatory tasks. I have a theory that I’m suicidal but because I can understand that suicide is a high level escapism technique I’ll never go through with it because I can see the other side. I’ve logicked my way through the concept of suicidality. No one can handle having a brain like that!
|
aspergers
|
Hello everyone, no therapist ever directly diagnosed me with ocd, but i know that I have it. Bad/dirty intrusive thoughts, suicidal thoughts yet you dont want suicide, just the thought of it scares you. I have been dealing with ocd in late january and got it pretty hard but managed to get better thanks to cbt. Suddenly the thinking came back. Idk if its just me, or sometimes you have a thought of someone jumping you with an ugly face (for a split second), even tho its a loved one, idk if its a hallucination or just anxiety working. I am so scared to take meds, so do you think meds in the solution? Im pretty exhausted and I want a solution. Could anyone please share his experience with meds?
|
OCD
|
I find things are much easier if they are simpler and or less hassle. One of the best ways to make this the case it planning and preparing ahead of time.
- Need to cook? Why not keep stuff you often used prepared and ready to go? I keep a container for each of the following in my fridge - sliced jalapeno peppers, sliced mushrooms, shredded cheese, washed fresh spinach. So throwing something together is much easier when I have to do it if I invest say 30 min every other week to set things up.
- Got to head out first thing and time is a factor? Get everything ready the night before. I go to the gym pretty much 7 days a week, and do so in the morning - I like to be out the door by 8 AM. So to make it easier to get going I load my backpack up the night before. I put in some towels, my trunks, shoes, gloves, etc (I work out in the pool for a couple hours each morning). That way when I get up all I have to do is fill my water bottle, grab my backpack and go.
|
aspergers
|
Does anyone else get stressed out when people suggest “taking a break?” I feel like I can never take breaks because they aren’t breaks. I’ll take a break from homework and then never finish it. The break lasts forever rather than it being just a 15 minute break.
Any tips for actually taking breaks?
|
ADHD
|
Im scared of death, but I have no motivation to keep going. I feel stuck and i have no idea how to fix this.
I want these feelings to stop, but i don’t want to do anything. I do the same shit every day, of every month of every year. I don’t want to live like this, but i don’t want to die. I wish i could stop time itself, just so i didn’t have to wake up every morning.
I can’t stop school, because it would ruin my future, but going forward hurts. What am i supposed to do in a situation like this. I don’t know where else to post this, so im posting it here.
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depression
|
just curious… bc ive struggled with being obsessive compulsive about certain things & especially my anxious thoughts is this something found in ppl with asperger’s? or just doesn anyone else experience this??
|
aspergers
|
I used to work at a warehouse and would constantly find myself with the need to hum or sing verses from 2-4 different songs that are constantly in my head. At my new job I work very close with other people, and controlling my urge to sing to myself is really hard. I find myself doing it unconsciously. Working with other people I can tell they were annoyed by it and earlier today one of my co-workers called me out saying "so you're singing that song again?". I'm super embarrassed and it just made me realize how annoying I am to my coworkers. Is there anyway or anything I can use to get my mind off singing. Thanks
|
aspergers
|
I just don't like myself, I am just insecure about who I am. It's almost as if I hate myself for who I am. My energy always crashes during the day and I just hate this about myself. I don't have the energy or strength to do anything beyond my university courseload. My burnout is just all pervading. Before the pandemic, my classmates used to avoid me and hate me.
I feel like putting a bullet in my head.
|
aspergers
|
I've been severely depressed for months. Almost 6 months to be exact. But it's gotten significantly worse this past week. Nothing has really happened, other than the constant realization that I absolutely hate living. I wake up every day and I'm crying shortly after. Because I'm overwhelmed and overthinking.
I see no future for myself. I've not been able to keep a job. Been working part time and I'm running out of money. I don't want a job where I have to talk to people a lot because I'll have to fake a smile or fake being happy and I just can't do that at the moment. But it seems that's all the jobs that there is out there availability for me at the moment. I want to go back to school but I'm afraid of the commitment and failing as my mental health has been so bad lately, can I even focus on something like school?
I can't go back to living with my parents because mom is in a different country and my dad has no room. I also have pets so that's too a huge issue. I would never give up my pets though as they're quite literally the only thing I have in the world. I have no friends at 26. My ex was my only friend and we broke up 6 months ago. I'm at my limit, guys. I started a new medication and am going to counseling but it's not helping. No one can help me but myself but I'm too tired and have no motivation to do anything. I haven't washed my hair in like a week. My house is a mess. I just don't want to be here anymore, I really don't.
|
depression
|
I am trying to find a job. For me applying at places that say they’re hiring no one wants to hire. I am trying any place I can think of. I ended up needing an ESA after what my last job put me through. I am falling behind on my bills. I cried tonight in front of said ESA. I feel like I am drowning at this point. I’m trying
|
depression
|
I'm sure many of you do, I'm just deep in my latest cycle of unsubstantiated cancer fear and so irritated by it lol. If only I could stop sinking brainpower and attention into examining and re-examining every single spot and hint of a spot on my skin and convincing myself they could be pre-cancerous...
where my obssessive "hypochondriacs" (or whatever is PC these days) at
|
OCD
|
My boyfriend legitimately forgets to eat for entire days and it makes me so sad😢 I have talked to him about how it is unhealthy and he is not talking care of himself and he recognizes that, but he cant seem to remind himself throughout the day—especially because he doesn’t feel hungry because of his medication. What can I do to help him? And how can he help himself?
|
ADHD
|
Obviously OCD patients are known to exhibit mostly awareness of the irrationality of their condition.
I was thinking the other day how OCD might be a trauma response. Something like a "kid in grown-up pants" syndrome. Something traumatic seemingly happens to someone in the past and they felt powerless and didn't get the help they needed. Most importantly, they were shocked how something like that could even happen at all.
Do you feel like your OCD is you trying to compensate for how irrational and unpredictable the world can be by not giving whatever fear you have no room to manifest itself? This could explain the sense of responsibility common in OCD.
NB: This isn't backed up with any studies to my knowledge and is just an opinion. A somewhat bold one. Take it lightly. What do you think of this?
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OCD
|
I've tried and failed heaps of different apps and calendars to try keep me organised and I'm looking for something to try. Any recs for apps or tools that incorporate calendars, to do lists, checklists, stuff that keeps me accountable would be great :) For reference some of the apps I've tried are things like habitica, todoist, and remember the milk. Also, is there anything irl that you use to keep you on track? Things like mini whiteboards, carefully placed notepads, or more specific/specialised planners? Thanks in advance!
|
ADHD
|
so i was got medication for this 20mg first days was fine it’s just i read the side effects of the medication and while i was on it made my head a little foggy not much but i got a panic attack out of nowhere thinking that the medication would make me suicidal now i have suicidal ocd which is harm ocd now i might have a medication that would change my life in front of me but this is the only thing stopping me what should i do take it ?
|
OCD
|
Hi everyone. I am an aspie with adhd and I have been struggling as of late. This will honestly mainly be a vent post asking for advice. Delete if not allowed. Not sure if adhd related or not. I have been getting into moods lately where I feel like there is nothing I can do right. I hate myself. As of late I find myself in this constant cycle of negative thinking at night. I am a 24 year old female who still lives at home. I am working full time hours in retail while in college and looking for am an apartment with some friends and that’s not going well as there isn’t much open right now. I recently impulsively cut my hair. Got off a lot of it. Everyone says it looks good but I tell myself they are lying and just being nice. My stepdad has a history of saying negative things to me. I was doing homework in my room and my room is messy because I don’t remember to or don’t have the energy to clean it. My stepdad came to me and asked me why I don’t do anything in my room and why I only do nothing. I already have trouble doing my school work as is because I have major issues with procrastination but as of late it’s been getting worse. I have no self esteem. I think all my friends secretly hate me and are all in on a big joke. I have been wanting to do nothing but lay in my bed and watch tv. It seems like that’s all I have the energy to do. I can’t even really get as into video games as I could before. I just want to stay in my room and watch my favorite anime Inuyasha and that’s it. I don’t want to annoy anyone with my presence. Anyone else have issues with this? Is it adhd related? Or aspergers related? Or both? I hate feeling this way. Been this way off and in most of my life. It’s just that it gets worse to where I can’t stand it anymore at times. Doing to the doctor soon for this. I just wonder if this will be a constant fight through out my life or not. Anti-depressants only last like 8 months before they no longer work and I wonder if this is just life.
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aspergers
|
since i have no where to say what is on my mind without people knowing , i wanna say that im fucking done with everything and i just wanna disappear .
thank you for coming to my ted talk.
|
depression
|
I can't remember much anymore and it affects my work life. I could be in one area then, be in another without realizing it. I can't focus at work. Anyone else struggle with long term dissociation?
|
ptsd
|
How can I stop allowing all my anxiety to focus on one trigger versus much more important triggers?
This is a wonderful group where it’s so nice to see people helping each other. While I’ve always had anxiety exacerbated by my OCD, I’ve had two parallel events happen around the exact same time and I seem to be bothered by one which is far less important than the other and I’m trying to get advice on how I put it into context when it comes to allowing my anxieties to be triggered. My mother who has been a rock in my life my entire life suffered strokes and has not been able to communicate since around July of last year. At almost the exact same time I found out a neighbor was diverting a stream to my property and is refusing to stop it. I have literally focused 95% of my anxiety on this yard situation which has gone on for months rather than what I know is many times more painful with my mom. I have literally tricked myself into believing I’m more upset about the yard then my mom and it makes me sick to my stomach. Even if I realize I’m probably using the yard to distract from my mother I still can’t stop focusing on the yard. I’d appreciate any help in dealing with again what are parallel triggers for anxiety but where the lesser important trigger is totally dominating. Also have you heard of this before we are you use a less painful event to replace a much more painful event even if you truly believe the less painful that is more anxiety producing probably because your mind is playing tricks on you? Thank you very much for your help
|
OCD
|
Not sure if this is just a me thing or if its common here, but I never memorize concepts as they are on paper, I tend to create this image of the concept and remember that.
few examples of this:
When leaning to play an instrument and play sheet music I never learned the actual letter notes, I only learned their positioning on the lines.
I've lived in the same neriborhood for more than 10 years and can only name like 2 streets because once I could see where the streets lead to that's all I ever needed.
I have a playlist of over 1000 songs and can point to any random one and know exactly what it sounds like just based off the thumbnail and the way the title looks. If a friend asked me about a song, even one of my favorite songs I struggle to remember them just from hearing the name, but if I can see the title I'll instantly know.
Not sure if this can helps or anything but yeah. Instead of memorizing words try to visualize them and create images of these phrases and concepts.
|
ADHD
|
I recently realized that there is a brilliant satisfaction to putting poster or finger paint in cheap dollar store doll’s hair, letting it dry, and picking it out. It gives the same visceral satisfaction of sliding down a flake, without harming your own skin.
I have severe eczema on the scalp and absolutely nothing but that sensation seems to do it for me, but finding this substitution was a huge relief.
|
aspergers
|
I’m devastated, my mom yelled at me so much, she cannot understand how can I be so useless, the funny thing is that whatever she says I already said it to myself, she was mean with me when I was a kid, now I’m mean to myself, specially when I mess up like right now. I needed to get a PCR and I overestimated the time it would take for the results to get to me, you know, time blind and stuff. I feel terrible, I know ADHD people have a hard time regulating emotions, and I really feel like crap right now. Have you ever miss a flight? I’m sure this things happen, specially to us, but I need some empathy cause I’m not getting much from the people around me
|
ADHD
|
I have mainly touching compulsions (touch a thing, felt wrong, do it again, wrong, do it again...) and I just can't take it sometimes and just yell at myself. I won't include what I say to myself unless asked because it's pretty explicit for a simple post.
Sometimes it does actually break the compulsion but it seems self-abusive and I feel strange and bad afterwards.
I have, in a few instances, resorted to self harm.
I do also have CPTSD.
Just wondering if anyone else does this and trying to use better coping mechanisms.
|
OCD
|
For those who have an iPhone, I don't know if you noticed but since iOS 15 there is a new feature called "Focus", which allows you to set several profiles for your notifications.
For example I have a "Work" profile, every notification is masked except messages from my SO and my best friend, and one or two apps.
There is a "Driving" profile which enable automatically when I'm in a car, I'm guessing by monitoring my GPS speed, no notifications are allowed, there is even an auto response when someone sends you a message, and if there is something urgent they can override it by responding "URGENT" back.
Every mode is customizable, you can add and delete them, name them however you want, set them up automatically (according to the time of day, your location, etc..)
I mainly use 4 modes, "Work", "Driving", normal mode, and "time for yourself". For the last one I chose to block almost everything, I use it when I feel overwhelmed.
It feels so good to be able to use my smartphone when I want without having the screen light up every so often or vibrating on the table. For each mode, the masked notification are grouped together, which means you can still see them when you want without missing them.
I'm sure Android has an equivalent, I just wanted to share this feature, I feel this is the right subreddit to do so.
|
ADHD
|
Hi everyone. I’ve been at the beginning stage of some kind of diagnostic process for over 1 year and a half now for ADHD with Kaiser. Edit: am adult, never been tested or anything before.
I did a DSM-IV checklist with my therapist back in April - never heard about any results or got feedback on that.
Took a 20 min CPT test (hit space when X pops up on the screen) in June(?) and according to my psychiatrist, it likely rules out an ADHD diagnosis. When I brought up ADHD with her during my appointment this week she almost signed me up for another one before I reminded her I had already taken it…
Started the generic for Wellbutrin this year. I have enough energy now to function on 3 hours of sleep I guess. Not sure why this was prescribed because everyone has been honestly dismissive of my concerns so far. Sertraline alone had also been pretty good for me for depression stuff up to that point.
Throughout all of this there’s been little discussion of what might be causing my symptoms besides depression/anxiety, which I’ve been receiving solid treatment for even as my potential ADHD symptoms remain unchanged. There’s been a lot of, idk, buck passing - therapist tells me to go talk to the psychiatrist (15 min appts only!), psychiatrist says the therapist is supposed to handle this.
Since I’ve basically gotten nothing out of this so far I sent an email to my primary care doc and received [this baffling response after spilling my guts to the guy](https://imgur.com/a/cgGfJFG). In my email there are a couple more specifics of what I’m going through and how I got here.
Am I at all justified in thinking this CPT shit is sketchy? Am I wrong to continue pursuing this? Is it time to look elsewhere for help/more thorough evaluation? Kaiser is looking like a dead end considering everything has to be in network and everyone there follows the same policies/procedures.
|
ADHD
|
This is a little story about my shitty life. I grew up perfectly social and normal until my late teen years. I developed anxiety and depression disorders that would bring me mood altering behaviors. People in school would laugh and make fun of me because I had no “personality”. I had a great group of friends the best friends I could’ve asked for at that time in life and I threw it all away. I betrayed my friends and never spoke to them again and it sickens me everyday that I have to live what that feeling. I hate myself more then life itsself. I think I see the world differently but I don’t, really Im just a small piece of a big puzzle. This being the reason today why I have absolutely no friends or no one to even talk to. I just wish I had the guts to get up and live a life or to just finish my life. -^_
|
depression
|
I'm in the middle of being diagnosed with adhd and have been given a prescription of xaggitin. But I'm willing to concede there is OCD in there too.
I can skin pick around my fingers often til they bleed. The skin around one finger in particular is so old, dry and scarred I found the only real way to stop is to regularly moisturize it.
I'm not sure about specific OCD thoughts but I think they occur around people I'm attracted to. I've avoided that situation for a while but there is one in particular I remember where I think we were both into each other and "I can't" just played on repeat through my head. I do always think I'm a creep despite never doing anything particularly creepy because I'm so vigilant about being labelled just that.
What's your thoughts? (wrong sub maybe to ask that)
|
OCD
|
I don't know what to do, my life keeps getting worse every day, despite me trying to make a difference. Please let me know if there's more I need to do to get out of this (16M)
\- 1-3 showers everyday (usually cold showers too).
\- brush 3-4 times a day
\- hit the gym 3 times a week at least (for about an hour), also take long ass walks
\- Study, although even still my grades are lacking.
\- Layed off the Caffine (had a coffee today for the first time in months)
\- Cut down the soda and replaced it with sparkling water (still occasionally have a glass of ginger ale/sprite)
\- Stopped eating junk food, still occasionally have a subway or something unhealthy at parties but other than that I don't know what to do.
\- Cut down on the eating (I've lost like 12 pounds in a year), although I was never really obese (150 to 135-140, 5'8)
\- Go to SAT Prep classes in the weekends
\- Quit watching porn and masturbating (Been exactly 2 weeks, I don't really get aroused anymore anyways.)
\- Quit gambling cold turkey (used to be a massive addict)
\- Stopped wasting my time w/ NFTs and Crypto to focus on school
\- Deleted most of my social medias (Snapchat, Discord, I only really use reddit occasionally when im bored to go encourage others or to just watch r/Cringetopia, and Instagram to talk to a girl whom supports me. I never really downloaded TikTok so I guess it applies to me quitting socials as well.)
\- Stopped watching Anime and playing video games (got boring anyways)
\- Stopped self harming
​
Even still, my life keeps going downhill. My calculus grade is shit right now, and I overdosed on 55 extra strength Tylenol pills 2 weeks ago, didn't seek medical health but I'm fine, due to getting overwhelmed by my grades (all my grades dropped considerable in a single day and I had enough). I got into a fight with my dad and after getting pushed to the edge, I told him about my depression and suicide attempt and my self harm scars. He's very pragmatic about it and started supports me, but I don't like this. I hate this special treatment. It doesn't feel genuine (he went from shit talking on my grades to telling me grades dont really matter and theyre a small aspect in a matter of minutes). He's really distraught right now, and I had to watch him cry. It hurts so much, I feel like such a burden. We both agreed my mom can't know about this. I really want this to end. I want to live. But if my life doesn't improve by June, I'm ending it. 5 years of depression, 4 suicide attempts, so much regret it hurts me everyday. Please, help a man out.
I don't think I'll relapse and fall into any of these addictions again (I have a go all the way through if you're gonna do something mindset). But I hate this, I feel like all the effort I put to improving my life just goes into the drain and I keep falling.
|
depression
|
I was just thinking about how I had the urge to clean up my teacher’s classroom once. He was talking about how it’s like an organized mess to him and in my head I’m like trust me I know. I feel like I may come off as a neat freak to people but that’s only because I’ve been so messy my whole life. I can’t stand showing other people my mess. I always try to appear clean to others and really when people aren’t looking I’m not. Also I write in a calendar now and my friend without adhd says she could never. I am extremely disorganized but I know if I don’t write shit down there’s a huge chance I may forget. Other people may be like “oh wow she’s so put together she has a calendar” but I’M NOT. My brain is a chaotic mess, I’m the furthest thing from put together. This is why we shouldn’t trust appearances. Also I may come across as very quiet but that’s because I’m incredibly annoying when I speak so I feel that it’s best to keep my mouth shut. Our ideas of what people are could be the polar opposite of what that person actually is.
|
ADHD
|
I'm officially diagnosed and have tried pretty much all the simulants medications, but I’m still quite confused about something: I frequently see people saying how stimulants make them feel calm or relaxed, but when I take them I actually become more hyperactive, i.e., pressured speech, fidgeting, tapping fingers, etc.
This seems different than most people I know with ADHD, so does this mean I’ve been wrongly diagnosed, and I don’t actually have ADHD?
|
ADHD
|
Anyone ever be thinking normally about something and then notice that you are thinking? And then feel uncomfortable? How do I approach this? If I continue thinking what I was thinking about it feels weird and forced. Sorry if that was confusing.
|
OCD
|
It's been a long time since I started to feel pain in my eyes and experiencing blurried vision. When I have anxiety due to my intrusive thoughts it gets worse but by the time I feel more calmed my vision tends to get back to normal and the eye pain goes away. I don't suffer from any eye affection or desease. Is it normal that if your anxiety levels are high, you experience what I mentioned?
Thanks in advance
|
OCD
|
Just wanted to leave this here for you from Greg Laswell. It's a struggle, I know. But every little victory is immense. Take a bow, my friend:
Take a bow 'cause you played your heart out
And take your time with working the rest out
And try and stay out of your head
I have seen you invent the damnedest things there
Don't lean back, my friend
There's not much there that will push you on
Use your stride, slow
And break it up over time
And try and stay out of your head
I have seen you invent the damnedest things there
Take a bow
|
OCD
|
hello. im 17f and i am diagnosed with ocd. my themes are somatic and pocd.
however last night i did something really bad but i stepped in to fix it before anything bad could acruallt happen and now i’m scared.
i was handing my mom a charger plug and she was saying something without letting me finish and i got anxious because my sister who is 14 was in front of her and being around anyone younger than me makes me anxious.
then my mom started turning around to leave and then i realized i was still holding the other end of the charger so i let it go and i expected my mom to see/feel it and catch it, but at the same time i started getting thoughts about what if it hit my sisters butt. however i know for sure i definitely didn’t use any force in my toss to actually do that.
and then the second i let it go i panicked and got scared that it may have hit her and so i told my mom to grab the wire and not let it swing around, i thought my mom would catch it so i didn’t panic initially at the thought of it hitting my sisters butt, also my mom and sister had some distance between them but i got anxious and felt like i was committing sexual assault and i didn’t want to make her uncomfortable so i stepped in and then i felt disgusting about myself
i’m afraid because i think i “acted” on a thought but nothing bad actually happened.
i keep replaying the event over and over and trying to figure out my actual intentions. i know that i wanted to let the charger go and leave as soon as possible and not go to the living room with them. also i wonder if i had a morbid curiosity to see if the cable would really hit her but then when i let the cable go i started panicking and stepped in to make sure nothing bad acruallt happened??
am i a bad person?
|
OCD
|
I have been struggling with depression for a few years now, i’ve been seeing a therapist which is helped me realize how little self love I have. I have recently been trying to find ways to build this back but it has been hard, especially since i’m confronting these emotions for the first time. I really do want to get better so i’m making this post asking if others have been through similar and have suggestions/methods for building confidence in myself.
|
depression
|
What made you realise you had ADHD? My auntie was recently diagnosed and so was my mum, and now my life is starting to make sense. It feels like I don’t have the energy to do basic tasks like cooking for myself or brushing my teeth. I forgot things and items millions of times a day and it feels like I have 100 tabs open in my brain!
|
ADHD
|
Ok, I know everyone has there good days and there bad days but, this feels different. I will have some days where I am on top of the all projects and being able to handle almost a weeks worth of work in one day. And of course have the normal days, but then have what I have called "bad autism days" and just be clumsy all around. Even using a fidget toy (which would at least be something I could do fairly easly) would be almost hard to use.
​
I was wandering if this sounded familiar to anyone.
​
Hope everyone is having a good day.
|
aspergers
|
I would like to get together with aspie members of this sub and others to record parts for a cover. I thought we could do something like People Are Strange by the Doors (am open to suggestions)
I can play guitar and bass, and I like to sing. But I want EVERYONE who wants to contribute to do so, even in the most unconventional way.
* drums/tapping
* singing/vocalizing
* humming
* Stimming to the beat
* triangles
* conventional instruments (bass keyboard etc)
* pots and pans
* brass instruments or any other type of sound in tune
* ACTING STRANGE so all the crap people make fun of you for, do it here! Spin and shout my ppl! I want to CELEBRATE what we're about
Everyone who contributes will be included, and I'll get the video and audio mixed and release it. This is not for any gain, personal or commercial. I will not own the material you give, only using by permission.
[Here's the song](https://youtu.be/sezc05A4s2g)
[Guitar tab](https://tabs.ultimate-guitar.com/tab/the-doors/people-are-strange-tabs-189373)
[Bass tab](https://tabs.ultimate-guitar.com/tab/the-doors/people-are-strange-bass-823696)
[Keyboard lesson](https://youtu.be/qDufMnnNcDU)
[Drum Tab](https://www.songsterr.com/a/wsa/doors-people-are-strange-drum-tab-s6261)
If this gets popular I'll buy the stems from https://www.karaoke-version.com/custombackingtrack/the-doors/people-are-strange.html and share them here. They're really easy to follow along to as it's each part isolated
Please record audio the highest quality you can (but anything will be accepted, I'll get it cleaned up)
Also if you want please record video... You don't have to show your face, but if you're stimming on your lap to the drum beat I WANT TO SEE It! Higher quality is obv better but there's charm to moar jpg
You can PM me a link to your file and once we have the full song I'll do an edit and share it here! You can put on headphones (noise canceling accepted) if you're listening to the song to follow along. Just a special interest of mine to help bring us together. We're so often alone... Let's do something cool together!
I'm going to record a guitar and vocal part tonight and I'll share them here
|
aspergers
|
Its been years since I feel uncomfortable when I'm with my parents (they don't know my highly possible Aspergers, or at least they seem to not know).
My mother always told me that I'm unpleasant, because I never cry when I should, because I don't seem to understand others when they're feeling bad, and many more things. So...because of how much she repeated me this, I always get really uncomfortable when we have a family dinner, or something similar.
My dad is abusive, and my mother is always accepting everything he does because she's scared of him being angry. In my case, sometimes I felt like needing to fix a verbal fight, but they always shout at me because of doing it (I don't know why). He is always talking about reptilians, aliens, covid...and it really pisses me out because that's so stupid, at least for me. Why to talk about that every day? It really annoys me!
They aren't supportive, and are always telling me what should I do for this and for that. It's like they don't trust on me, so they guide me.
This being said, I'm better now. I really needed to vent.
Thanks for everyone who's reading this, I hope you're having a great day.
|
aspergers
|
She never failed in her relationship. She now have her own good family. She has stable job. She smiles. She's so loved by everyone. She rarely make mistakes. Has a good judgment of things. A free-spirited woman. She's my parent's favorite daughter. I wish I could be like her.
|
depression
|
I feel so incredibly empty. My depression, anxiety, and body dysmorphia issues are becoming too much. I just feel completely disconnected from myself and like I can’t connect with anyone around me. I feel like I will never be happy no matter how hard I try.. no matter what I do, how much money I spend, what I look like.. nothing will ever be enough. I feel like I will never fully connect with anybody.. and I feel like something in me is missing that I’m desperately trying to fill. I’m just so sick of feeling like shit and overthinking every single thing.
|
depression
|
I just don't know how to get myself to approach someone. Every time I think about going out to meet new people I either get lost in my overthinking about where would be an appropriate place to initiate a conversation with a stranger or I just simply can't get myself to leave the house, so even though I want to go out there, in the end I am stuck at home due to my own inability to start with stuff.
(sorry for the terrible phrasing the end of the sentence, the alternative would have been sitting here for halve an hour to decide on a better way to phrase this)
Even when I am outside and have the chance to approach someone, I still get too anxious to do it and then the moment passes or I start overthinking again, to try and decide what to say, until it is too late to say anything.
I just feel like I am constantly standing in my own way, but I don't know how to stop
|
ADHD
|
The fundamental structure of the thought process of a person with Asperger’s Syndrome (compared to a neurotypical), at the most basic level is simply the lack of an internal “narrative I.”
Every symptom can be traced back to the fact that there is no constant telling and retelling of the stories and fragments of thoughts reinforcing
the confirmation bias ordinary people constantly require to give substance to the idea they exist... Instead, there is a blank space, useful for thinking, but free of endless ego-centrifugal orbiting, self-reverential data.
Questioning which of these two cognitive imperatives is superior, one is inclined to think the non-narrativised paradigm is the better system,
and the stigma society places on individual psyches in this state is a mistaken psychological and sociological inflection point based in intolerance, ignorance and arrogance.
|
aspergers
|
​
https://preview.redd.it/yqllj9js1aj71.png?width=359&format=png&auto=webp&s=a26ba6d3b9aaff6898de9349c32a5731c1fa24bb
|
OCD
|
I feel like I bother everyone :( I feel so nervous to talk to anyone or ask for help…. And no one seems to really try to understand anyway, I think… I such a failure at everything… there’s no point in me trying anything at this point. I really feel it’s too late for me :( I wish I could run away somewhere where no one would ever find me and never come back… I wish I could rip myself out of my body and escape myself. I feel so trapped… I wish I could start over… and with better circumstances so I wouldn’t have turned out like this in the first place… I’m so lonely and everything makes me cry… I’m too nervous to be around anyone or make friends though… I even have Bumble but I just keep scrolling even if someone seems like they’d be nice because I’m too scared and I’m really boring and have nothing good to say… all I know is my depression and how miserable I am… and I don’t wanna have to make that my personality and that be the topic of all my conversations so I just keep to myself until maybe one day I’m well enough but I don’t think that day will ever come… I’m so tired of everything. I don’t talk to anyone about it anymore. I feel like a shell. Just hollow, dark, cold and empty. I know people say that only you can bring yourself happiness but I truly can’t do that… I wonder if the people who say stuff like that know that mental illnesses exist.. :(
Anyway, sorry to bother you guys… I dunno…
|
depression
|
Anybody have a DO instead of MD as their psychiatrist? I am scheduled to see one in October. My current psychiatrist does not accept insurance and this doctor does. I just want to make sure they are ok with prescribing benzo's if needed or other sleep meds I may need
|
OCD
|
I feel kinda at peace with my feelings now, I feel like I can finally go. I tried so so hard to hang on but I can’t take this anymore. I’m gonna jump off the tallest bridge I can find on my 21st birthday.
|
depression
|
So one of my compulsions is washing my hands to feel “clean” and it means that basically when I enter my dorm, I have to wash my hands before setting anything down (the exception being what’s in my hands). However, I also don’t like using the bathrooms in public on campus, which means I also have to pee right when I get back. So now I basically go wash, bathroom, wash. This was all fun and games until now even when Im just washing my hands randomly, I have the urge to go. I now have to retrain myself to not pee every hour and it’s OCD’s fault
|
OCD
|
The only person I really liked in my life is leaving.
The only person I ever felt like I'm home.
She's everything I have, literally.
Everything I do and everything I represent is because of her.
But I never was good enough. It's my fault. She's leaving because I fuck everything up. I hurt her.
I don't know anything I could do without her.
It's just over.
|
depression
|
I am in a very deep hole right now, where I just want a place to belong and feel loved because I dont right now :( I am even shaking while writing this.
Some background information about me: I had a very rough childhood because I was bullied in school beacuse of my inatentiveness and quirky traits so I found peace and safety at home with videogames and a seemingly loving family. My parents were always the type of people who would rather secure the peace in the family than to adress and validate everyones feelings and were also raised to suck things that bother them up most of the time. I have very little friends and I dont feel save in a lot of places. I do go to therapy and try to learn new ways to cope and life a good life.
​
I had an incident some time ago. I had some friends that weren't really good for me with whom I smoked a lot of weed and who were trying to lead me into a direction in life that I thought wasnt the best for me. At the same time I god prescribed methylphenidate for my ADHD for the first time in my life. I think the combination of both the weed and the methylphenidate kinda made a barrier inside me disappear and I leashed out on my dad with some pretty hard and panicking words in the kind of that I thought that we have never had a functioning father-son connection and that I never really felt connected to him. I don't know where these words came from, obviously from a very dark place in my brain. I couldnt see my family for a few weeks after that and my mother stated to me that she will take care of my dad first now. I never felt more like a fuckup more than in that time and I just didnt know who I was back then. I then got off of the meds and minimized my weed intake drastically, through the help of my cousin got back together with my father where we both cried hugging eachother and telling ourselves that were sorry. I love him so much and I feel so bad even now that multiple months have passed. I also got newly prescribed wellbutrin and its working very well for me. My mom isnt the same towards me as well since then. She acts more distant than before, like always being suspicious of me.
My father was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer and my whole family isnt doing very well since everyone is under a lot of pressure.
I recently had a discussion with my mother and I could tell that she was frustrated about everything that is happening rn in our family. She basically told me that she would kick me out of the house if I was not vaccinated against corona already. The discussion continued and came to the topic of smoking weed. I told my mom the truth that I occationally do smoke weed but only if Im in a really good mood and just want to enjoy my time and not out of anxiety and thats about one hundreth of the amount I smoked before and that I really feel myself having everything under controll. She then told me in a passice agressive way that she hopes that such an outbreak will never happen again. Later on I confronted my mom about what she has told me before and she litterally told me that she is afraid of me and is distancing herself. MY OWN MOM FEARS ME.
I just dont know what to do, where to go or what to do with myself. Im in such despair and just feel so unloved and uncared for by everything. I just want a save place where I feel loved because I have a really hard time doing that for myself right now
|
depression
|
does anyone else make different scenarios of ways people could get hurt or the ways you could hurt them?
|
OCD
|
As stated in the title. I've come to the conclusion I really need to do something about my inability to handle tasks in a certain timeframe. I've even thought about managing all of this earlier this week when it was fully preventable but I just couldn't get myself to do the work needed to sort it out.
To all of my fellow ADHD ridden redditors I just want to say don't let it spiral out of control and get help from friends. If it wasn't for my friend I would have probably broken down today.
Tomorrow they will send a technician to reactiviate the power to my home.
It wasn't a money problem but to organize my power supply and set up a contract that's automatically drawing from by bank account.
So much hassle for nothing really. Fuck this condition so much. I wish I could just DO THINGS.
|
ADHD
|
Mine are:
Louis CK. I know he's done f'd up stuff in the past, but If you we focus on his works as a comedian, I would put him higher than anybody in the stand-up world. The way he thinks about life, how he approaches life's hardships and uncertanties, child like curiousness of his are so realtable. He is like those books where you read your own thoughts that you always thought about but could not put into a single sentence.
Cody ko until Covid hit. He is a youtuber who reacts to other cringy neurotypical youtubers. He is obviously a neurotypical, but I love that he applies a lot of logic to his obsevations, i think thats a rare thing for classic neurotypicals. Now as he became rich and famous he feels little out of touch, but if you look at his old stuff, you will get what I am saying.
|
aspergers
|
I’m posting this here because I do have pretty bad OCD and I love this community. Does anyone else ever just get the overwhelming feeling they’re gonna die? For the past few months pretty much everyday I just feel like my life is over and I’m going to die. It started off as a feeling of me making huge mistake that will ruin my life and now its just that I’m going to die. :( does anyone experience this often?
|
OCD
|
I always have in the back of my mind a scape reaction ready, whenever I interact with older men who have any power over me.
Today, since I've been trying to be mindful of my feelings and thoughts, I realize I have this "ready to hide/scape/protect myself" mode whenever I interact with my boss....
My boss... He knows there is something odd about me, although I wouldn't say anything about my ADHD to him. He is very kind, and always tries to help me out, be available, and is a very nice person in general. No sign of aggressiveness whatsoever, he is a very likeable person. When I interact with him, I have genuine fear, and the certainty he will become aggressive, and snap at me because I will do something stupid that makes him angry. I am aware how irrational this sounds, but that scenario is always playing in my mind. With him, and with a the other bosses, or men holding even a bit of power, I have ever had.
This is a correlation that has been cooking in my subconscious for a while, and today finally clicked.
My father who has undiagnosed ADHD and OCD, shaped during my childhood the future of my relationships with men in power.
ADHD runs on my father side, his brother got a diagnosis later in life, denied it forever, and he is alcoholic, paranoid, completely not functional, very typical worst case scenario for untreated ADHD. My father on the other side, has been able to keep a good job for over 30 years, since he can hyper focus on it, and is a very stressful job, dealing with life or death situations every day.
My father is a very hard person to deal with, he has extreme mood changes and can make a huge deal out of any little stupid thing. He also has very bad RSD. When I was little, he was very aggressive, he'd scream a lot and hit me with the belt for very stupid things. Me having ADHD, and being the clumsiest girl ever would freak him out. I remember peeing my pants, when I saw him putting on his belt because I'd think he'd hit me.
He would be even more aggressive with my brother, I remember him kicking my brother (6 yo) down some stairs because he didn't want to go for a walk. Dumping a cereal with milk bowl on his head because my brother didn't want to eat it.
I finally realize this fear, this hide or die mode is because I just got trained to behave like this since I was little.
My dad has changed a lot, he supported me greatly since I was a teenager, and I'd like to have a good relationship with him, but I have this big hate inside me that I can't manage to get out. My dad loves me a lot and wants to talk to me a lot, but since two years ago I've just gotten more and more far from him, because I feel like I want to.
I don't have anyone in my life who can understand this. From outside it just looks like I'm just a lazy person trying to blame all her problems on her family. My father has greatly supported my education, and I wouldn't be who I am without all his help, I am not ungrateful, I know he suffers, I know he is human. But how do I start healing and building healthier relationships with men in power, and with my father?
|
ADHD
|
Ive been dealing with depression (along other things) for a while now and so far, i’ve told this to very few people in my life.
I recently had a very bad, public breakdown due to which many folks eventually found out.
I have had bad days, and im used to forcing myself to act normal. It had been working great because not a lot of people knew. But ever since the recent incident, every little thing i do to make myself better or feel better - i have this sudden sense of guilt. Why am I pretending that i’m okay?
Not sure how to go about this.
|
depression
|
There is so much controversy surrounding ABA. Is it possible to practice it ethically and be a good “model” for positive change in the field or is it a hopeless case? Any adults with autism that have had positive experiences with it? I know the field overall have undergone drastic changes over the past 5-10 years but I don’t know if it is enough. Thoughts?
|
aspergers
|
I just started minipress for nightmares and it seems to be working pretty good even though I've only been on it like a week. I'm impressed! But I was wondering I have a lot of trouble during the day too with flashbacks, intrusive thoughts/memories, etc.
Is there something like minipress for the day time??
|
ptsd
|
After being misdiagnosed several times and being prescribed several different antidepressants/antipsychotic medications I finally got prescribed a stimulant. I talked to a new psychiatrist who was again going to prescribe me antidepressants yet again but I put my foot down and told them about how I didn’t think that would be the best option based on the past ones I’ve tried. The psychiatrist ended up prescribing me modafinil which is actually used to treat narcolepsy but has shown to benefit people with ADHD as well with less side effects than typical stimulant meds. All I can say is wow… it’s only been 3 days but the constant sluggishness I felt/ the difficulty focusing and just existing has almost completely gone. For reference I would have to exercise 40 mins and drink tea in the morning and also sometimes coffee in the middle of the day to feel awake and alert and focused, where as I have done none of that I just take this tiny pill and it works better than exercise and caffeine combined. The effects are somehow very subtle but also not at the same time? Like I don’t feel like a zombie or anything and my moods feel much more stable instead of a rollercoaster each week dare I say I actually feel… good? Like I feel a sense of calm and confidence about myself that I had seldom felt before. I was just thinking to myself like wow this weeks almost over I don’t think I’ve ever had a week feel this “easy” like it feels like I can just live my life and I don’t struggle as much getting stuff done. I know it’s very early but I hope that these meds continue to work well I just figured I would share my experiences since I’m pretty shocked at how much the right meds can do for you.
TLDR: Tried a bunch of antidepressants that didn’t work, first stimulant I tried worked wonders.
|
ADHD
|
as a pre-warning this has some pretty descriptive intrusive thoughts written in it. just so you know before you read it.
this is the worst thought loop ive ever had. i have no idea what to do about it. i literally cant connect to anything without a thought coming up like "what if your not really connected to this?" or when i try to connect to someone i love i get "what if you dont really love them?" and a lot more thoughts in these general categories, but the one thats really kicking me in the ass is "what if your not yourself?" its so vague and ominous and could take on any shape and it makes me feel so afraid to connect to anything. ive found no intrusive thoughts like this, and i just kinda feel alone.
ive been desperately trying to deal with this. theres someone in my life i really love and want to be there with, but it genuinely feels like my brain is trying to gaslight me and it makes connecting emotionally hard.
i just want to figure out what to do so i can be happy again. my ocd hasnt been this bad in ages and i feel crushed by it.
|
OCD
|
I was diagnosed with OCD about a month ago, which my significant other also has. I never would’ve even suspected I had it, I thought my symptoms were something everyone experienced. But I constantly worry that talking about my own problems around them, because their OCD is a lot worse than mine and I don’t want to take away from their experiences.
I told them about an intrusive thought I had which had been weighing on me, and I’m afraid that I’ve triggered them or spoken over them.
|
OCD
|
I'm posting here because I think I may have PTSD but I don't know.
Last March, like a week before lockdowm began,, my mom was diagnosed with stage 2 triple negative breast cancer, which to say lightly, I did not take very well.
I remember a couple days later I broke down during 6th period and was sent to the counselor. Bawled my eyes out in her office, had to be picked up early.
Fast forward a month and after my mom's second round of chemo, was sent to the ER for a colon infection. She looked and felt so miserable i wanted to cry myself.
Fast forward a view more months and progress has been made against cancer. It was declared that any runaway cancer cell that escaped from the tumor was killed, (not sure if they're were any, but still great news) so thats that.
I will say my mental health improved during that time since we made great progress against the cancer.
What I will say, is that I was still worried out of my mind.
My mom is severely immunocompromised, ontop of the severe autoimmune issues she deals with usually. Almost every day I worry she would catch COVID and die, she was the most high risk you could be.
To say it consumed my mind and life would be an understatement.
Come October, she's had surgery and was declared that there was no measurable disease (different from cancer free as cancer free is when you are certain there is no cancer left whatsoever, no measurable disease just means your not detecting anything, little cells could still exist).
Oh, I should probably mention she's been to the ER 12 times by this point in the past year or so, her immune system being so weak she gets constant infections.
Christmas 2020 was...eh, she was in an autoimmune flare again on Christmas eve and Christmas day (a flare is when you feel extra sick when you experience a huge uptick in autoimmune symptoms.)
Start this January, I was put on Isotretinoin to treat my severe acne.
Go to March and this my friends is where my mental health plummeted.
I started having vivid flashbacks of the cancer diagnosis. Crying while mom hugged me when we got the diagnosis. Bawling my eyes out in front of the counselor.
I can't focus on anything anymore. Its almost physically impossible to just...do online school.
I keep getting these thoughts and flashbacks against my own will, I try to ignore them but..its just no use.
I also can't help but shake the feeling the cancer was my fault. I know scientifically it's not, but I still can't stop thinking that because of me existing, I put my mom through the pain that is cancer.
I probably cry every two days or so. I just feel disconnected from everyone. My parents are the most loving and understanding parents you could ask for, and yet, I just feel lonely, detached, isolated.
I feel bad by coming here when everyone else has it far worse then me, I feel like i don't think I count as trauma because it's not as bad as everyone else's.
I just...can't do this anymore, I just want it to stop. The isolation, the flashbacks, the guilt....
|
ptsd
|
This seems to be a very controversial topic on Reddit, so I want to give my take and maybe start a discussion. I want to start off by saying that I was very lucky to be diagnosed early in life, at the age of 8, so you know where I'm coming from.
I see a lot of people on here who refuse to take anyone seriously who doesn't have a formal diagnosis. Autism isn't an exclusive club that you need a piece of paper to access, and a diagnosis can be difficult to get, depending on where you live, especially as an adult. There are long waiting lists, high costs (again, depends where you live), and simply social stigma about autistic people that make getting a diagnosis scary. If you don't have a diagnosis, it's okay to talk to autistic people about what you struggle with, and maybe the things that work for them work for you too.
So I think we should welcome people in the community if they don't have a diagnosis for whatever reason, but suspect they may be autistic. That doesn't mean a diagnosis has no value. Even if there are long waiting lists, or it's stressfull, you have to at least try to get diagnosed if you suspect you have a condition. You may be wrong, maybe you have a different condition and you've been looking for help in the wrong places. A formal diagnosis can help you in many more ways than just talking about it can. You can get accommodations at work or school, you can get social services, and depending on the condition, you can get medication you might need.
TL;DR: believe the struggles of people who haven't been formally diagnosed, but at least try to get a diagnosis.
|
aspergers
|
Hi,..I'm just trying to see if there are others out there who can relate. I used to be depressed AF about life no matter how successful I was. I moved out of my home country a year ago and for the first 6months I was planning my death. I was sp gross that I was freaking adamant to make my friends understand that I was depressed...and they were annoyed at me being so..so they snapped me out of it and I'm not depressed..I'm actually happy...seeing a wonderful person..life is normal but I feel like I'm not .this is not me. To me,I was not worthy of life..of anything good ...and right now I'm starting to feel like I deserve shit and something tells me that's not good.. I'm depressed that I ain't depressed 😐 this is just nuts.
|
depression
|
Please give me hope. I'm currently taking escitalopram 10mg right now po my anxiety and my mind keeps thinking about my breathing.
|
OCD
|
Just did this and needless to say I’m extremely stressed and freaked out now. Any logical explanation or reasoning I had before has completely gone out the window. Just never look up symptoms; you can and you will somehow manage to convince yourself you have x or y.
Although I frequently get the urge to look thinks up it’s definitely not worth the days, weeks, months+ of stress and distress it’ll cause me. Figured I’d make a post like this to come back to whenever I have the urge to look something up so I can fight it. Please remember everyone, never look up symptoms!!!!
|
OCD
|
I feel so guilty for this. I’m 16M. I’m a virgin. But I have dated multiple girls in the past and whenever my friends would ask I would lie and say “yea i’ve done wherever with whoever.” I feel terrible for this now, I said that I did things with a girl who i’ve never done those things with, that’s wrong. She doesn’t live near me at all anymore so IK it won’t affect her but I feel so guilty for it, it was a terrible thing to say to others. She’s such a good person and I lied about having sex with her multiple times. I don’t know what to do, it would be pointless to call her and say I lied about having sex with her, It’d just start a huge problem. IDK what to do my OCD is driving me crazy. My hands look like lizard scales and my mind has just been digging for things to feel guilty about. What should I do about this?
|
OCD
|
I have really bad sleeping problems. I can feel extremely tired but my mind still won’t shut off so I end up just laying in bed feeling bored and annoyed. Don’t even get me started on naps those are basically impossible for me.
Is there anyone here who knows how to deals with this??? I’ve tried listening to calming instrumental music but its been a hit or miss. I’m looking for something more consistent.
|
ADHD
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First thing’s first. I am on the spectrum along with this girl who also has Asperger's. This got deleted from r/aspergirls probably because i'm a guy. although I have many lady friends, I still find it hard gaining perspective on the other gender. Without further ado
Two years ago, I met this girl. She’s the first and only person in my social life who is a fellow Aspie. When we met, she had feelings for a guy who we are mutually friends with. According to our social group. The crush was for three years. But I came around. Next thing I know, we were dating but it was the end of the school year and she has strict ableist parents so no phone for her when she’s at home. The relationship ended because they found out and at the time, I didn’t really have feelings for her. She told me she did, though Fast forward to Junior Year, (last year). I started to gain feelings actually but wasn’t actually sure and I wouldn’t confess my feelings for her until after winter break. But, love doesn’t wait. At the start of 2020, she told me that she has a gf now. She’s bi so the fact that it was a girl wasn’t a surprised to me. I didn’t hate that it was a girl. I’m not homophobic. I had a lot of emotions about it not being me. Plus I had my own stuff to battle with. I also didn’t know how to handle my emotions as I tried to shoot my shot on one occasion and hiding what I wanted to say so she wouldn’t feel bad the next. It’s important to note that she was in a long distance relationship. We both live in Chicago and her gf lives in the Philippines. Then the pandemic happened. We didn’t see each other until September for the SATs. I met her dad and he took me home. I felt those feelings come back. She had broken up with her gf. But now I feel like after we graduate high school, she’ll forget about me. I wasn’t exactly a best friend I claimed to be.
What I need help with is I feel like I really made her uncomfortable through my simping over her and I wanna make it up to her. My feelings for her are now gone as of now but she doesn’t know that yet. And I really wanted a female’s perspective on this. Did I take everything too far? Did I mess everything up? I just, I just don’t know anymore...
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aspergers
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I really love the look of a formal shirt and a suit jacket. I always liked that serious look people in suits have. While jackets are okay to wear, the shirts are way too movement restricting and i hate wearing them at home because i feel like i'll tear it if i move wrong. Are there shirts that aren't that restricting? Have i just had bad shirts all my life? I'm not talking about flannel shirt, i mean only the suit ones.
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aspergers
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This is a new obsession and i’m not sure if anyone else has experienced this? My brain will give me this gut awful feeling that i’m missing out in life because i’m not acting on my intrusive thoughts…makes no sense, I know. If it upsets me so much, why would I be missing out. OCD is a bitch. Let me know, though!!
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OCD
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my man has Asperger's we are in a hard situation we were living apart I got my own place he can't be on the lease because he's got charges he can stay a few weeks then has to leave he can stay at his dad till he had a out burst and his dad's tv fell on his foot he broke it now he can't come back this month is nothing but trouble no one will let him stay
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aspergers
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I was a pretty non-serious student who graduated from an average college and got an average job as a fresher, after staying jobless for two years. Due to circumstances and to support the family, I was forced to take a job in Admin that was a total 4 hours commute back and forth, a toxic boss and mediocre pay.
This job was sucking the life out of me and I was desperately looking for a job closer to my home. After surviving a year, I got an offer for a Retail Sales position that offered me the same salary but offered commission and was much closer to my home. I immediately accepted the offer as our financial position didn’t give me the luxury to take a break and find the ideal job. However, I didn’t realise that I actually shot my myself in the feet because now I’m stuck in a role for nearly 5 years that I just took on out of desperation.
I’m almost 30, single and live with my mother(I’m not from the west). My brother is also working but his job also doesn’t pay very grand. Expenses are increasing but my salary is the same, as our company isn’t paying commissions like it used to, post covid.
I now realise how massively wrong career choices can affect you. I never thought I’d work a retail job and work night shifts. I’m desperately applying for Business Development roles to get out of retail, but it is incredibly to find a better job without making shit up.
My job has ruined my life. I suffer from crippling depression due to financial stress, no social life as I have distanced myself from friends who are doing far better than me in life.
I literally fucking hate myself.
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depression
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After a long day, all I want to do is to stop thinking about everything. Turn off my brain” in a sense. I can’t solely focus on movies or shows. I’ve picked up different hobbies here and there but nothing’s really sticking with me currently.
Any activities or advice that you’ve found helpful to quiet your brain?
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ADHD
|
I've been thinking if I should adopt an ESA. To be clear, I don't need a service animal (although I might opt for training to distract me or DPT). Things aren't that bad for me tbh but I'm realizing more and more the extent of my social anxiety, desociation, and isolation is more than I thought.
Have y'all benefited from ESAs even without intense flashbacks (mine are mostly emotional rather than somatic episodes)? Is it more stressful than helpful? Does it really help people stay motivated to do everyday tasks? I'm afraid that I'll just be a terrible dog parent because I worked in rescue and have pretty high standards for dog ownership.
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ptsd
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Damn, it's my first year of uni and the first term is coming to an end. I spent a month there and then had to head out for an operation and will likely be in recovery till January now.
Not only am I feeling like I will never catch up on my assignments and work, but I am also feeling like university really isnt for me. Ive been taking meds on and off for a few years (mostly during exam seasons) studying animal based courses- currently zoo management.
Fuck I just hate how underwhelming it is in comparison to college. I dont feel like I can engage in lectures as fluently as I could in class, beyond that Im at home with powerpoints to shift through and learn from for 9k a year WITH NO CONSISTENT SUPPORT. Everyone around me is saying to rest n I just feel like I cant properly coz I know when it gets to the end of the month Im gonna be neck deep in assignments with zero knowledge that anyone else has gained from lectures and Im just gonna fail anyway.
All I can do is feel hate toward myself and everything around me. My brother n sister got degrees and maybe that's why I feel the need to do the same! Im angry and fed up and it feels like I am walking toward the edge of a cliff.
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ADHD
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I need to have a career at this age but with what I'm interested in, I wont last anywhere. My parents keep bugging me to get a new job. I cant stand when they tell me to find something else or go to school. First they started to scare me saying that I will get kicked off off of the insurance and I wont have any. That didnt really bother me because I know that I can get cheap insurance through my employer thats really good insurance at some point. My parents then, who I live with said what if they weren't there what would I do? Its like they are using fear to control me. Before anyone says it they just want the best for me but I know what kind of student I was at college and I know that nothing really interests me and Ive just become complacent. I dont want to spend all this time taking courses to end up working like a dog for 40 hours at some place that I cant stand. Video-games is all that I really care for.
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depression
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This is my way of sharing what my OCD did to me with anime since I like it. While I never imagined my OCD as an actual sentient being led alone as an anime egdelord and my subconscious mind is obviously not an orb, everything I say it has done to me it has ): I hope I don't break this subreddits new rule about no memes while doing this, while it is kind of a meme I'd say it's more serious then that.
​
First part
My nerves: Oh no you don . . . wait what is that!?
My OCD: This what I hold in my hands is the subconscious mind, it can be used to rewrite reality within you and make the most insane things appear normal, like for example touching your dad's dick many times
My nerves: No, no NOOO!!! Uh OMG why'd I do it?
My OCD: Don't worry, it's normal
My nerves: Yeah you are right but I should still fight you, I think?
My OCD: "Shakes the orb" Noo, I am your friend , your light, your Messiah. Under me you will be perfected
My nerves: Ok I guess you aren't that bad, I will keep you aroun . . . wait a minute, no you are the bad guy
My OCD: "Shakes the orb" No I am not
My nerves: Ok, I wish you weren't making my family vacation horrible but if you say you are good you are good. Wait no I let him destroy another thing and I even let him make me touch my fathers dick a several times and lick trash cans
Second part:
My nerves: Sorry I failed you brain, I did some indecent and horrid things again
My brain: Damned OCD?
My nerves: Yes
My brain: It already costed us all greatly, it tricked me to lash out at Peter our old best friend and I lost my light and my social skills for it. "Flashback"
My OCD: You see him, he is the one that didn't let you touch his mouth for the ritual to free yourself from me he is responsible for
My brain: Wait a minute! I am done with your bullshit, you already made the nerves touch Peter many times you even made me touch his mouth ones under the same lie that you'd free me but it did nothing, so maybe it is all your fault! Don't you dare insult my best fr
My OCD: "Shakes the orb" No, no, no i am clearly giving you an easy ultimatum for I am a merciful deity, to free yourself from me I could have asked for something much worse like raping your mother and yet I have not and your "best" friend is ruining it for you, he is stopping you from beating me! He hates you!
My brain: I am not sure, you did say all that once befo
My OCD: "Shakes the orb" So what, I was going to fulfill it just now! You were so close to being free and he took it for you cause he is a sell fish asshole!
My brain: You are right Fuck you Peter! And your mom! You are a monster asshole, you destroyed my life you selfish twat!
My OCD: Good
My brain: Wait, why did I just do that!? NOO! Peter wait I am so sorry I wasn't thinking clearly, it was a moment of weakness!
My OCD: Well if he hasn't hated you before he sure hates you now "Shakes the orb" don't worry we don't need him, you are perfect with me.
My brain: I guess you are right, I have nothing else now anyways since I have only ever bonded with him "sob" I will be fine I think. "back in the present day"
My brain: So you see, I know you didn't mean to touch that or to lick the other thing me, you and the others will end him!
My nerves: Fine, but make sure you get him good for making me an Alamabian!
My brain: It's a date!
Third part
My brain: I will beat it.
My dick: We will beat him!
My nerves: Me too!
My lungs: Me three!
My teeth: Me four!
My mouth: Me five!
My brain: You came. Good with this crew we will take care of the Plague!
All six: Yes!
My OCD: Don't be silly, I can't be stopped
My brain: Where is the subconscious mind?
My OCD: Oh you can take it "takes of shirt revealing the subconscious mind"
if you can take it from my body that is!
My brain: What? What did you do!?
My OCD: I merged with the subconscious mind turning it into something far more sinister, the Depression Monopoly. With this power I can alter your reality as I see fit constantly. I have become one with it and with it I will perfect you all!
My mouth: I am not gonna lie, we are all gonna die
My nerves: Now is hardly the time for rime
My brain: Stop messing around! He has grown much more powerful then before, you can't even touch him, even I don't know can I take him on.
My dick: I will take him!
My OCD: You can't, I will end you
My dick: How do you know!?
My OCD: Cause . . . I already have
My dick: These thoughts, they are coming from the Depression Monopoly, this is what he mean when he said "already have" hasn't he? No why am I having wet dreams of mom why am I nutting to her no wait how dares she turn me into an Alabama man, I will tell her that she can't be hot ara ara like tha
My brain: Wait! It's a trick you are not nutting to her cause she's hot you are nutting to her cause OCD is tricking you like it did with me and Peter don't fall for it
My dick: Fuck you! I don't want anything to do with you!
My brain: I mean if she could have been considered something of an ally we lost it too now
My OCD: Here I go!
My nerves: Damn, he's coming
My dick: Fuck
My brain: Tch
My OCD: Be perfected!
My brain: Neve Wait, everything but Nintendo and Minecraft is HELL, my childhood all those places, all those thoughts all those products, concepts all is HELL, he turned EVERYTHING to HELL, I am not sure I can even fight, whatever he's became. Huh wait who is that?
My crippling depression: I have been summoned to aid OCD
My OCD: Now do the thing
My crippling depression: You are worthless trash, don't deserve to have your father at your junior graduation and don't deserve to fight back any thoughts OCD spawns must embrace them as your punishment for being sub human
My brain: Damn it, OCD is already strong as hell but now this guy too? I can't fight them and the others certainly can't
My OCD: Good, and now hereby I ban you from ever thinking about your passions or thinking at all you will be thinking abut that which you hate with my powers! You may breath, but right now both of us know, you are DEAD!
My dick: What? He must only used 1% or less on me just now, he just turned EVERYTHING to HELL!!! This is so not good, Brain! hold up don't give in!! Even I am giving in damn it!
My brain: Even if I am dead, you can't stop me! I am not like the dick, I don't give out on the first lewd or the first inconvenience, cause unlike you I have a reason to fight for, a will to see the light at the end of this tunnel! Never give up! Cause that's the one thing I have over you, persistence
My OCD: Fine, you will fail one way or another and then you will become the perfect puppet, lead a perfect life by my hand let the tiresome thinking to me and you just do as I say
My brain: I am losing my straight by the second. You are the brain do what you best, think think think outsmart him. How? Is there a loophole in his rules, if so where? How to exploit it? Can I even? With what? Yes, there. They can distract him while I set up the stage. Guys, you can help too , even if you don't compere to the power of those two monsters or me you can still help, give immediate pleasure so we don't lose the fight even if it's not long-term all you need is to stall for long enough for me to get back up and beat those two!
Dick! Beat yourself
Teeth! Process good food
Mouth! Sing nice songs
Lungs! Breath air, even if not fresh since we can't go outside
And nerves will distribute it all through senses
My OCD: Ha, you think you can do anything!? Please you will all lose here and be turned into horrifying creatures one will be used to fuck your mom one to near death suffocate yourself, one to bite children and one to destroy the vocal chords and you to distribute it all but I won't make you do those things unless prompted
My lungs: Don't listen to him, as powerful as he is if we give in the worst outcome happens, we have nothing to lose!
My OCD: Fine, have it your way, you will be perfected shortly, crippling depression hold the brain for me brb.
My Crippling depression: Got it boss
The five: Aaaaah
My OCD: Aaaaah
My mouth: Damn, he is way beyond our powers, we might as well start picking flowers for our graves
My nerves: For the love of God, no more rhymes!
My OCD: You are perfected!
My brain: Not so fast!
My OCD: What!? Why didn't you hold him!?
My crippling depression: Sorry, he's will and hope were too strong
My OCD: Oh well no matter I'll just kill him again
My brain: You are so high and mighty, consider yourself a deity, a Messiah while being no better then the Japanese that made Chinese civilians rape their daughters, mothers in WWII while making their family watch and then killing them for fun!
My OCD: A God
My brain: So God complex?
My OCD: Not if you're an actual God
My brain: So it is a complex for you
My OCD: Shut up! You think you are so smart I am going to turn you into a raping and killing machine in your next life if you don't stop with that attitude!
My brain: I have beat you
My OCD: What?
My brain: Remember the final ritual?
My OCD: Wha Oh OH that thing, ha hahahahhahahaha, oh my dear brain that was just a made up thing to paint me in a good light, the ritual is impossible, Peter was right
My brain:
My OCD: Right? It does sound like something I would do? doesn't it
My brain: Remember another thing?
My OCD: What?
My brain: You kept torturing me with your sick rituals for a while now, they grew bigger and bigger and eventually when the literal laws of time could not support them you decided to give me the ability to pretend to do it super fast to be able to finish them, in reality you did all of this just to make some rituals possible so you'd prolong my torture. But then, what is stopping me from using that on the final ritual?
My OCD: What? No NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! no, this is not ho it works, how any of this works! I am your God and I torture you to death and turn your life and you to Hell and then I perfect you from there, there is no way that your plan would actually wor . . . huh? No what? No no no this can't be happening.
My mouth: The subconscious mind, or the Depression Monopoly or whatever it was called, is it killing him?
My brain: Yes, The Depression Monopoly will grant every one of your wishes no matter how sick it is, so even if it was a joke, nothing serious the fact remains you said you will die once the final ritual is complete and the Depression Monopoly is merely acting out on your orders. Further more without you I have no basis to despair so clinical depression will die with you as well
My OCD: I will just strip myself of it to survive you idiot
My brain: That won't work, the Depression Monopoly will see to it your own judgement is brought upon you and for the sake of everything, have honor accept I beat you at your own game, by your own rules.
My OCD: No NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO how could I end up like this, one moment I held all the power in your World and the next I die by it! I will not accept it, I will not accept any of it!!! EVER!!!!! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My clinical depression: Mr. OCD, I don't feel so good "both disappear leaving the Depression monopoly to revert back to the subconscious mind this time completely free"
"Imaginary Hell shatters"
My lungs: Could it be, happiness light again here!?
My brain: Going in these places, thinking about these things it is not Hell the only hell was OCD all this is a God's gift how come others don't appreciate the fact they can walk freely without bending down and sheeting their vision or think things without 1000 of penalty's or everything every second of every day of every year of their life? I will always and I got the people I lost back most notably Peter so let's go do our things, think our thoughts and be happy!
All five: Got it boss!
All six: FREDOOM!
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OCD
|
Anyone else feel fairly good in the daytime and bam - right as the sun is starting to set your brain and ocd go crazy and torment you till like 3 am? I guess my brain decides that’s when the intrusive thought flood gates are allowed to open and my ability rationalize leaves the chat.
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OCD
|
Allow me to preface that I am not diagnosed with OCD, and I in no way claim to be 100% sure I have it. I’ve just been doing some research on symptoms and whatnot and I check most of the boxes. I hope this post does not offend anyone as that is truly not my intention.
So every night as I’m getting ready for bed, I start having these thoughts about something catastrophic happening to my aquariums. I have three betta aquariums, and between worrying that they will somehow jump out of their tanks, or their heaters will overheat, or the tables that tanks are sitting on will somehow collapse in the middle of the night prevents me from going to sleep. I feel the need to constantly get up and make sure the lids on their aquariums are on tightly enough, check their temperatures, and that the tables are sturdy. When it’s not the aquariums, I have a similar problem with checking to make sure doors are locked, porch lights are off, our security alarm is turned on, looking outside every time I hear some sort of noise, and making sure I know where all of my cats are at any given moment. Overall I have the thought in my head that any sort of mistake or forgotten chore on my part will result in the injuries/ deaths of my family and pets. I end up losing hours of sleep from constantly getting up and checking all of this before I can finally go to sleep. For instance, last night I went to bed at around 9:30, but I didn’t go to sleep till around 1. It used to not be as bad as this, but it’s progressively getting worst and lasting longer. I am on my summer break and usually get up around 8 so it’s not costing me a lot of sleep right now, but if it keeps getting worse it’s going to be a big problem when classes start back in August and I have to get up at 6 for an 8 AM.
Like I said, I have no idea is this is actually OCD. But if it seems similar, are there any simple tips for just…forgetting everything and being able to go to sleep? I apologize if I’m out of line with this question.
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OCD
|
DISCLAIMER: I'm not looking for medical advice, I already have a team of doctors. I'm generally wondering how people manage to live with side effects and how people weigh the burdens/benefits of meds.
I was diagnosed over 10 years ago when I was in university and took Adderall basically daily for several years. It worked in terms of me writing a particular paper for an evening but overall my anxiety was absolutely insane, I barely ate, and I tended to abuse it. I still ended up failing out of school.
It's many years later and I'm generally much healthier mentally due to age and therapy. I stopped taking Adderall once I was out of school because it wasn't totally necessary anymore- I still severely struggle with ADHD but I've learned to stop fighting it and work with it to find new coping skills. I decided to go back to school as I'm now much more stable and mature, but I can't strong arm school to work with my ADHD. I need the meds again.
I've been working with my psychiatrist to find what new meds work for me (I'm now diagnosed with bipolar disorder II, she decided it's managed well enough with meds that I can try stimulants). But it's not going well. I figured Adderall was just so intense, was probably on too high a dose, wasn't monitored, struggled so much with anxiety and other life problems that I wouldn't have such a problem with them this time. I tried Concerta for two weeks- lowest dose did absolutely nothing, next dose up HEAVILY sedated me, like i was bedridden, and had to stop a few days before my follow up. Very weird for a stimulant? We were sure it wouldn't be the same on something else. She put in on Vyvanse and I've been on it for nearly two weeks. Same thing, lowest dose absolutely nothing, second higher I am just really spacey and fatigued? Like I'm not distracted or have a million thoughts like normal, but it's almost TOO much in the opposite direction that I just stare into space with a blank head. PLUS, all the typical fun side effects like anxiety (which is bringing back my nervous ticks), racing heart/short breath, and no appetite. Maybe it will be better when I increase again or I guess she'll just have me try something else.
But I'm absolutely spiralling with panic that nothing's going to work for me and I'm going to just fail out of school again, after I worked so hard to get back here. Does everyone just suck it up and live with the anxiety meds give you? Even a low level anxiety is just intolerable to me long term, I worked VERY hard in therapy to heal my anxiety and I can't go back to that life. Or are there really perfect meds out there for each person that doesn't give them any anxiety? Or will the anxiety just go away, or can I combat it??
Also, am I a total freak for these meds having a sedating effect?! Even my psychiatrist barely believed me. When I've taken pills as a one off I don't get this, it seems to be when I take them long term.
Sorry for a long post I'm just absolutely at my wits end, I was in SUCH a good place with my other medication and therapy that I felt ready to go back to school, and now I feel like I have to either sacrifice my quality of life to stay in school or stay unmedicated and flunk out again. I don't think I'm capable of school without meds, but I don't think I'm capable of functioning as a content human on them.
Please help with reassurance or insight if you have any.
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ADHD
|
I’m currently sitting waiting for someone to see me so I can get some government assistance. Just some food stamps and Medicare.
I feel so defeated. This is my third visit here and it just feels like they don’t care. I keep getting turned away.
I just need help so desperately and I feel so defeated.
I feel alone.
Today is also the three year anniversary of the assault that put me on this path.
I feel like people look at me and think I’m fine and I don’t have any problems.
When in reality I can barely get out of bed. I just stay in bed and watch YouTube to try to get over it.
I didn’t want to post this because I don’t want people think I’m just attention seeking. Seeing people shame other people for speaking about their struggle has really effected me.
I just want help. I’m barely living.
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ptsd
|
I have this obsession that I might want to worship the devil.
I have some angry thoughts and sometimes just really edgy thoughts in my head. And during a thought like that I might think "I'm a demon" or something. But why? I wasn't thinking about that specifically. What is triggering me to think something like that when I think angry/edgy things?
These thoughts seem to have an almost exiting feel to them. Like I'm really putting my all into thinking them. Can it feel like that? To feel like I'm actually enthusiastic or wanting it, and just reprising that desire? Almost like butterflies in my stomach.
I also get things that seem to genuinely persuade me for a few seconds. Like thinking "If Satan only wants to sin just like a human does, but God created Satan knowing he was going to be this evil and then throw so many people into hell. Wouldn't God be more evil then Satan?" And I genuinely think about it for some seconds (maybe even past ten). I feel as though points are being brought up somehow and then I maybe want to believe them.
Or I was just thinking about how I saw a video of a guy giving money to a homeless man and imagined him as a Satanist (I had a reason). And I thought it was bad because he recorded himself doing that for ego. But then I basically thought "if that's Satanism, then that's not bad". What the heck, I keep thinking things like this.
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OCD
|
Most people I know file their nails. I can’t stand the sound or feeling of that at all, it’s so terrible and I hate it. I’ve tried clipping them or cutting them but that makes the pointy and uneven which is also very annoying. For years I’ve just been biting them but I really want to stop doing that
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ADHD
|
Hey all!
So I (m, 30) have officially been diagnosed with ADHD! In a way, I'm not surprised at all and quite relieved. I always struggled in school and spent a lot of time running around playing soccer or basketball to try to expend the seemingly limitless energy I had.
I struggled academically in high school and could never focus and always felt like getting up, leaving class etc cos I found it so boring. I barely passed high school and have no college or university education. I was able to pass some IT certifications, because IT is one of the few things I can focus on, cos I do find it interesting.
My mother always knew I had some kind of attention / behavioral disorder but she is against ANY mind altering substance and refused any diagnosis or treatment that was offered. (She thinks cannabis is as deadly as heroin 😑).
In terms of my working life, I've always taken "easy" jobs such as cleaning, supermarket stocking, box packing jobs etc. Jobs that didn't require too much mental exertion. I think I have subconsciously avoided any work where I might be judged for not paying attention or focusing.
So, I've been prescribed 18mg of Concerta once a day, increasing to 27mg after 3 days. I will then have an evaluation with my doctor to see how I'm doing. I took my first dose 2 hours ago and I feel strange. I definitely feel a little more focused (evident by the fact I've managed to type all this!) But no real significant change yet. I realize it's only been 2 hours, so maybe things will improve as the day progresses.
I feel weird in all honesty. I'm really happy that I've been diagnosed and have treatment but I feel lost in a way as this is all new to me.
Thanks for listening! Just had to get that off my shoulders ❤
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ADHD
|
So, lately everything has just gotten worse. They upped my benzo's to try and mitigate the anxiety/stress/panic I get (sometimes it's right when I wake up, sometimes it's at noon), but the fear is there.
I check behind me, like, 500 times a day I'm so nervous. I don't know what of. Getting up in the middle of the night is horrific. I'm terrified somebody is under my bed.
I feel stupid. I'm starting to forget to take my meds, I can't get out of the house or do chores, etc. I can't stop crying.
I don't know what to do, how to even get a service dog, or anything. I'm just at a loss since i can't take anymore medication other than benzo's, which are dangerous in the long run.
Anybody have any advice?
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ptsd
|
Naturally I make a post this morning and then “brag” about how shit hasn’t been that bad lately. Then a few hours later I get triggered into what turned into a 30 min daze of just staring at my desk in class and I don’t even know what we went over. Yay me! (Insert sarcasm here)
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ptsd
|
Mid fifties. 30 years at a stressful job. I make great money when I’m working. How do I know if I’m burned out. What do I do if I am? There’s more to life than this, right? I feel like I am sabotaging myself with certain life choices. Maybe I should just quit.
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depression
|
So I’ve been in a few support groups but they are all religious based and don’t hit the points they need to for our situation so I’m hoping to start one to help us all out
[View Poll](https://www.reddit.com/poll/lss0sa)
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OCD
|
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