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Trigun (1998) is a show that I think everyone absolutely needs to watch. It chronicles the misadventures of a compassionate idealist, as he journeys through his dystopian and cruel world, whilst fighting his own inner demons, misconceptions others have about him and his ideals, apathy within himself and the general apathy, violence and selfishness of that has rooted itself deep within the world around him, just so he can spread his message of love and peace to all, and help heal the broken hearts of the world around him with simple compassion. It also depicts the toll of his pacifism, as well as his perseverance and antifragility despite said tolls and his inevitable mistakes in his pursuit of a pefect devotion to his ideals. The protagonist, Vash, is someone we can all strive to be like as he is someone who understands the beauty and value of life... ALL life, even those who hurt him. This amazing show has helped me through many hardships in my life, and helped me move past and grow from times I broke away from my ideals of compassion, and return to said ideals. It helped me grow from my perfectionism and forgive myself (especially the final episodes). This masterpiece has left me feeling less alone and has given me the strength to carry on in my quest to change the world with compassion and resillience. I sincerely hope it does something equally, if not more beautiful for you, my friend :) Thank you for reading, love and peace to all! (You'll get that when you start watching)
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OCD
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does this happen to you guys too? it has been really bad lately
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OCD
|
Poking around Reddit, I see that I'm far from the only one who has been given a diagnosis of ADHD only for that to become ADHD and depression only for that to become "possibly just depression."
Personally, I don't particularly care what the label is as long as I can get on a treatment that works (so far, I've had the best success with Wellbutrin and am doing really went on it). My doctor doesn't seem hung up on it either and kind of shrugs off the question when I ask him what the firm diagnosis Is. And I fortunately live in a good healthcare system where, from a cost perspective, the distinction seems immaterial.
So I'm wondering: if it's unclear how much of your concentration issues are due to (primary) ADHD and depression or vice versa (primary depression secondary ADHD)--- do doctors really *need* to figure the puzzle out?
Or is there nothing wrong with continuing treatment while feeling slightly uncertain about what you actually "have" and with what's causing what?
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ADHD
|
Hey everyone, this is an embarrassing thing to admit, but after finally correlating it with my OCD I’m connecting some dots and finally cutting myself some slack.
For the past three years I’ve been in a very happy relationship, but I also notice in the back of my head I will sometimes have intrusive thoughts about an old tinder date I saw for two months before meeting my current partner… I don’t have feelings for this old tinder date, when I think of him it’s mainly me wondering if I hurt them or did something wrong by stopping seeing them because I liked my current partner. I used to be really hard on myself about this, like who the hell wants their partner constantly thinking about their past fling? But I’m pretty sure this is an OCD compulsion…
I’ve never met a new partner while seeing someone else before, and it’s turned into this obsessive guilt.
I will unnecessarily check in with myself or have dreams about this person in fear I did something horrible to them three years ago, when in reality I just stopped seeing them after a couple months. Pretty normal?? Then I feel so guilty for even thinking about this person after so long.
There have been times I thought maybe I had feelings for them due to my frequency of thoughts, but I truly do not have romantic feelings for this person and I’m so happy with my partner. The thoughts feel incredibly intrusive, and I’m trying my best to not feel creepy and just let them pass.
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OCD
|
I am a very lazy person. Probably because I'm a teenager, I won't lie. I also happen to have ADHD.
I get meds every day, and not a small amount, but I still find myself consistently not doing homework, schoolwork, and the things I'm supposed to do in school.
**It's not as if I forget to do it, often I do know it (well not always if I'm the middle of doing something but maybe every 5 minutes I'd guess). I just REALLY don't want to do what I'm supposed to.**
**This would be fine if I genuinely didn't care about good grades, but I always find that when I come home from school, I regret not doing anything. Sometimes I already feel that regret right after class even.**
**This sounds like laziness, but at the same time, I'm so tired of going to school or to class knowing I will get nothing done and there is nothing current pre-class me can do about it.**
**It just doesn't occur to me at all in the moment that I should be doing my work. In that moment all that goes through my head the choice between doing something fun and something not fun. I'm not always completely oblivious to the consequences, but often it just takes so much energy I don't want to spend to get myself distracted from the distractions/procrastination**
I don't know if I got everything I wanted to say said there, but I hope I did.
Does anyone know a way to tell if you're just being lazy or ADHD is messing it up? I would appreciate it, because it would help me find out how to control it better.
TL;DR: Need help to tell when I'm just lazy and when I'm being sabotaged by my ADHD
Help appreciated
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ADHD
|
TW: discussion of intrusive thoughts
​
​
I often get horrible thoughts about violence, death, and some other nasty things. A really common thought I have is if you do/don't do (random trivial thing) then something horrible will happen. A lot of times when I get a bad thought, I will knock on wood so that it doesn't happen. However, I don't have any other ocd symptoms like checking. Does this mean I could have OCD?
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OCD
|
I’ve had serious depression for over 3 years now but I used to push it back by doing school work because I genuinely enjoyed school. The only problem is that now that I’m in senior year engineering I’ve seen all my professors slowly get shittier and shittier. They are more vague, take longer to say anything, make the exams extraordinarily hard for no reason, and sometimes are just assholes. I was staving off my perpetual loneliness from losing my girlfriend by doing work but now I really just want to kill myself.
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depression
|
In the last few months, I have had so many intrusive thoughts about each of these things concerning my physical appearance:
my height, my hairline, my voice, my jawline, my skin, the shape of my nose, how fat i am, my leg thickness, arm thickness, my ear shape, my posture, head tilt, mouth-breathing, facial expressions, eyebrows, teeth, walking form, nipple size, ass size, muscle mass, sitting form, fingernails, body hair, to name a few
I just want to be satisfied with myself.
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OCD
|
So after the past three years I've been dealing with a lot of rejection sensitivity and working on it. Since I was a kid, I'd always ask "what did I do wrong, please tell me!" for some peace of mind. My most recent friendship was with a girl whose been crashing on my couch since her family kicked her out. At first it was great, but she soon took to \*physically\* ignoring me, ignoring when I greeted her, etc. For the longest time I tried to reach out, and even wrote a letter to her to ask if I did something wrong. Her reply was "You didn't really do anything wrong, but now that you asked if you did as if I'm a bad guy, you did". But it was clear things were bad before that. She's in the process of moving out but I don't know if other people experience this thing where friends just can't tell you why they've rejected you. My sister treats me similarly. When I asked her what I'd done wrong she just said "I don't want to talk about it".
My life has been filled with these people who just distance themselves, and obviously it makes rejection sensitivity worse. Anyone else experience this? I don't necessarily need advice (although it is welcome) but want to know I'm not alone in these vague expressions of disgust from ex friends and family members with no real meat.
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ADHD
|
My "family" is the cause of my ptsd from exploding tempers and sexual abuse. I can't keep living with most of them. I got exploded on last month and my ocd will break me down to dirt with the intrusive and repetitive thoughts and I've really come to the conclusion that living will never be an answer for me.
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ptsd
|
I spent almost half the session earlier this week with my psychologist telling him how it was my fault that I was raped two years ago. He tried to argue with logic and reminded me what I previously have told him about what happened and how that contradicted the narrative that it was my fault.
I ended up crying because I knew that he was right, but I just still couldn’t let go of that feeling.
The thing that makes me feel crazy now is that I’ve spent a lot of time since then feeling shameful and guilty, because I’m afraid that he now thinks it’s my fault and that I’m faking or exaggerating my symptoms, since it wasn’t really rape (which I know it was, but I keep thinking that it wasn’t as I feel like I didn’t fight enough against my rapist).
How does any of this make sense?! Please tell me I’m not the only one being in this sort of chronic limbo between my logic and my feelings…
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ptsd
|
Has anyone else had a nervous breakdown caused by a random OCD trigger that usually wouldn’t have bothered you?
I’ve just entered this state and I feel I’m just suspended in time.
2 weeks ago my brain literally just obsessed so much over something that the mental health crisis team had to come out with emergency Valium.
I haven’t left my flat for 2 weeks.
I’ve been trying to do laundry since then but after each cycle it never feels right so I ended up doing it 7 times over until I just gave up. I’ve been wearing the same clothes for literally days. I’m eating a couple of kiwis a day and drinking coconut water because my OCD won’t let me order a grocery shop.
A few months back I was able to literally do whatever. I worked out a lot but I can literallt see my muscular progress just melting away.
I wake up and it’s when it’s the worst. I’m usually able to “relax” to some illusioned degree late afternoon.
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OCD
|
I'm ready to quit my job any day now due to overwork and a toxic environment. I can leave at any time since I have money saved but keep clinging with desperate hope because I struggle with change. My adhd is not good at handling change in my environment.
I'm a manager at a mfrg company and have shared my concerns with my boss among many others...with the overwork and the fact that my job has regressed to very basic, non-challenging work. It is so mundane I can barely stand it.
I went above and beyond to share information with my team via email and my boss replies "thank you. Can you schedule separate meetings to discuss each product." That would be 8 mtgs I have to schedule for doing something I didn't have to do. I would not be as angry if my boss had not said at a prior meeting that a new manager would be in charge of product launches and these are "products launch" mtgs.
Side note. There is a problem at my workwith female employees getting stuck with all the admin and organizing-type work....and also not being taken seriously which i'm not imagining as othes have complained. I even expressed this to my boss at one point and he was "angry" about it. The new manager is male. Not sure if it's just a coincidence but seems to be the trend on my team and in the company.
So I have nothing to lose if i'm ready to leave my job to simply reply to this email and ask, "in x mtg, you said John would be in charge of product launches? If this is still the plan, would this fall under his responsibilities now?" Literally nothing to lose here yet I'm terrified. I believe his request is unconscious and I tend to give ppl the benefit of the doubt but this new guy was hired a couple years out of school and here I am 20 years in the industry and 3.5 years at this company and continue to get the grunt work.
Adhd has given me a low self-esteem and I constantly feel the need to make up for my short-comings. But it seems pretty logical to ask in this case. However, I always give in...even when I know the person is doing something on purpose! Like I can know they are pushing my buttons and still comply??? Any advice to get over it and be brave?
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ADHD
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hey so i’m 17, ftm, and most definitely have adhd + am autistic .
basically, sometimes my hyperactivity gets so intense that it is draining: ex : constant rambling, heavy breathing, losing things and looking for them while moving a LOT.
like when i’m alone and hyperactive like earlier, it genuinley feels like something atune to mania by how intense it feels, just thoughts spiralling a million miles an hour, talking to myself (and pretending to be a youtuber lol) and just a faster heart rate.
does anyone else experience this? the only way ive ever been able to calm myself down is by smoking p*t, and even then it doesnt always work and just leads to hightened anxiety.
any tips? similar experiences?
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ADHD
|
I just got off the phone with my mom and I cannot stop laughing about the ridiculousness of the conversation. I told her my psych “graduated” me to the next level of working thru my ptsd which meant that I’d have to start feeling whatever emotions are attached to the events that I’ve detached from for years now. Right off the bat, my mom, in all her ignorance, asked me if it was a wise choice to become emotionally regulated when I’m in a family that has multi-generational emotional suppression. I laughed and said yes it is, to which she asked why. I told her by suppressing my emotions, it’s literally killing me. By having that learned behavior throughout my life, it will end up killing me.
I’ve struggled with suicidal attempts in the distant past (pre 2003), and ideation off & on since, as recent as 2016 when she left work to come sit with me in my apartment one night. I also have a severe history of schizo-affective disorder (schizophrenia & bi-polar for me). My family hasn’t really been there for me through much of that short of my mom sitting with me. My brother & his wife are largely hands off with me in the mental health department.
I’m not allowed emotions in my family. I can’t get frustrated or mad, I can’t cry, I can’t be too happy, I can’t be moody, I have to be the equivalent of a robot, emotionally speaking. So with all this ptsd sht going on, it’s been hell going it alone. I’ve called them out for not supporting me once & my SIL ghosted me for 7 months.
BUT! What I am glad about is that my weird sense of humor is coming back after it being one of many things robbed from me, and as it’s come back, it’s picked up inspiration from this hell and oh boy does my family not find me funny anymore. So I just gotta laugh at my mom clutching her pearls and being personally offended that I would try to break one of the few family traditions we have.
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ptsd
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Has anyone here ever had this experience of people (even when trying to be friendly) talking to you in a patronizing way and as though they see you as a child rather than an adult? Even in situations where you have not outright told them you are ASD? In some situations depending on the sexes of the people involved this might have to do with sexism (it's pretty common to hear women complaining about men talking to them in a belittling and patronizing way - sometimes unawarely), but I'm wondering if this is a common if not necessarily universal experience among both ASD men and women, and if people intuitively "picking up on" HFA/ASD/Asperger's might not be a factor?
Does it bother you when you pick up on it, and have you ever verbally confronted anyone about this?
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aspergers
|
i had a really bad lsd trip start of august, around 415 ug? or something along those lines, saw myself getting raped, was screaming, was the most realistic thing i’ve ever experienced, i thought it actually happened, i have doubts that it did happen and i’m just dead because i could feel myself getting raped and i could see the men, they feed me drugged water and was trying to put me to sleep to kill me, i could hear my family and friends screaming for me, i could see the men touching me, looking at me in my eyes, no one will ever understand what i went through and how much it has changed me, im crying now even thinking about, and my breathing is getting heavy just writing about but i’m really anxious now because of it, but i keep having these dreams where i get raped or kidnapped soemthing similar to what experienced and i wake up sweating, crying, heavily breathing, these are nightmares that terrify me, i can’t even describe some of the shit i see, idk if anyone has any tips? to help with these
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ptsd
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Hi all! So for as long as I can remember I’ve been really obsessive with hobbies and things in general. I’ve always thought it’s been normal because other people do it too. I’m 17 if it helps any. So right now for whatever reason I’m really zippo lighters and what will happen is I will find something I like and kind of try to milk it. I’ll watch all the videos I can find join subreddits and the like. Is this common with ocd? I’m pretty sure I have it based on the nature of what I’ve been experiencing recently, but I just want to hear your experience. Thank you!
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OCD
|
I've been working as a printing press operator at this place for almost 4 years now. My co-worker always whines and complains and always talks about money. He's utterly mindless and disregards anybody else, yesterday he proved it. For four years I have tried to tell him stories and one of my last jobs had been at a bakery. I've told him this dozens of times, but he always makes some smart ass remark to what I tell him and it's usually something besides the point I'm making so the conversation stops there and I never get to tell him anything, he literally won't listen. Yesterday I mentioned again for the umpteenth time about the bakery, and this A$%\^LE turns around and says "wow, you worked at a bakery?". My other co-worker doesn't like him too and him and the production manager were there and I told my co-worker about this, and he laughed and so did the production manager. My co-worker said "oh, your so funny". I don't understand why or how that's funny because it's not. It's upsetting, they just laughed, they thought it was hilarious and to be honest that hurts me too.
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aspergers
|
Hi all
​
The past couple days were very good, I was able to almost have absoulety no compulsions and even when I did I shut them down, had a tougher time today but I'm doing good
​
I let into a compuslison where I was scared that maybe I was posted on a local gossip site (pretty shiity website right? like why would anyone make it). I was trying to force myself to not check. i ended up checking but of course I wasn't on it.
​
I failed fighting a compulsion, but on the other hand I proved to myself that all my ridiculous fears arent true
​
\- I
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OCD
|
Hey everyone
So good news I was half way through a compulsion regarding my ocd with the number 6 and I stopped myself. I never usually can do that. Usually once I start I at least finish the compulsion and vow to stop next time
Bad news is I feel literally sick
Intrusive thoughts about that I may go to Hell. Which I don’t even believe in
I just keep trying to tell myself that a silly number cannot condemn me. But I physically feel the anxiety it’s so bad :(
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OCD
|
For me, it’s the importance of good greetings and farewells. Not just saying “hi” but also “how are you?” or “have a nice day” when you’re leaving. Also, when someone asks you how you are you ALWAYS should ask them how they are too. A little friendly back and forth goes a long way in making people like you
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aspergers
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It kills me that I've never had what everyone else has had
I know I haven't been the best person or the best friend in the past but I don't think I did things so terrible that I deserve what I'm going through now
I hate this and I wish I was anyone but me
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depression
|
This is the first job where I’ve properly declared my ADHD at the pre-employment occupational health check and I’m so pleased with how it’s gone.
The occupational health nurse fully understood the condition, asked relevant questions and her report to the company’s HR department was sensitive and allowed me to disclose myself. It just said ‘neurodivergent: would benefit from home working.’
I then emailed my direct line manager to tell them and attached [this document from the Scottish ADHD ](https://www.adhdfoundation.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/An-Employers-Guide-to-ADHD-in-the-Workplace.pdf) coalition. She responded positively encouraging me to let her know of any reasonable adjustments I might need. I said I was fine remote working but may need adjustments if / when there is a return to the office.
Today I had an hour long induction via Teams, and half way through she checked in on how I was doing and I said I could do with a quick movement break. She was completely understanding, said to always let her know if I need that or similar and we had a 3 minute break while I wandered my room and did some stretches. I finished the rest of the induction standing and this wasn’t questioned at all.
All this to say: I’m so glad I disclosed. I know some people will have negative experiences from disclosing so I’m really pleased to be working somewhere supportive!
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ADHD
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So yesterday I was in Spanish class and I really considered throwing myself down the school stairs/purposefully falling down them. I don't think it was slip n slideal but I think it was so I would be able to leave the school. I feel a bit better today. But should I tell my school counselor/therapist tomorrow? I think it might help, but I'm also worried about going to a mental hospital. Yesterday that's what I wanted, but today I don't really, and that seems kinda scary.
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depression
|
For context, I have been told many times by my mother, and a few others who have known me for a while, that I had been displaying symptoms of autism since I was around 2 years old. However, I hadn’t received an official diagnosis until around a month prior to my thirteenth birthday. Because of this, teachers, counselors, therapists, etc., were incapable of accommodating for certain traits that made me, for a lack of better phrasing, difficult to deal with; that sort of thing.
Anyway, recently, I started thinking; as time went on, my symptoms were becoming less noticeable, even for me, and this seemed to start only about 2 years ago (I’m 17 now). I wondered if, somehow, I was outgrowing my symptoms, which I thought for ages to be impossible. However, I went online and decided to investigate this myself. Well, it only took one simple google search to confirm what I somehow missed all this time; depending on the severity of the condition in the subject, a person with high-functioning autism can outgrow certain symptoms over time.
One of my little special interests has always been doing my own research and studies on psychology, and mental disorders/illnesses more specifically. I’ve known a lot of things, and even learned things about myself through this passion that I didn’t know before, but I had never heard of this being mentioned before. Am I the only one who didn’t know this?
To add to this strange discovery, the shift in symptoms in a person can be so extreme, that they can even have the diagnosis be removed from their record due to it now being ‘outdated’, if you will. I’m not saying I think my autism is now suddenly gone. That’s not how that works, but it would explain why I don’t really exhibit many of the symptoms I had 4 years ago. Maybe this isn’t new to most of you, but I somehow missed this piece of information all this time, and I just wanted to share my findings.
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aspergers
|
In my experience (and I'm sure a lot of yours too) my ocd tells me that if I don't do the compulsion I am gunna be distracted when talking to people. And distracted when I'm trying to enjoy my day. This is the big lie. When I have had the strength to not do a compulsion in the past I have always just forgotten about it as time passes. It might take a while sometimes. But other times not long at all. You have to SIT with the sensation. And TRUST that your brain will forget about it when you do your best to be in the moment. Much love friends. Stay positive and get well soon!
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OCD
|
This may take a while, but the title is the TL;DR. So some context: I have certain relatives that I have permanently cut from my life for reasons that are not relevant to this post, as a result I have been out of contact with others who I want in my life for half a decade. I finally decided that it was time to reconnect with these relatives, we set a day and time to get together and catch up, which was extremely stressful for both me and my SO. The day that we were getting together came and with it a lot of anxiety. As we were headed to the home of my relatives my SO observed that I was starting to have some facial ticks (a clear sign that I was already past my emotional capacity to cope) and I did what I always do in such situations, I faked it (which I do by effectively going into "spoon debt") until we got home.
This is the part that is more interesting to me, I don't know if or how many others can borrow spoons from days that haven't happened yet, but it is part of how I have survived. To the observer it looks like I sucked it up and handled the situation, but I already knew that a complete breakdown was going to be the result within a couple of days, that's how it works. The next day seemed to be going fine, in the evening my SO took a shower, while they were thus engaged my emotional debt caught up with me and I completely shut down and withdrew into myself. They asked what they had done to cause it, I answered that they hadn't done anything, and they didn't believe me. After a couple of hours I managed to explain that to deal with the situation the previous day I had effectively borrowed spoons from the coming days and that I knew I was going to fall apart later and that I had no way to know when it would occur, so it really had nothing to do with them. It was like a light suddenly went on, suddenly a lot more things about me and my behavior started to make sense to them.
It felt so weird, in a good way, to have them finally get that just because I fall apart while I'm with them doesn't mean they were the cause.
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ADHD
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possible tw
ok so basically i have always had this strange memory where i am at the church that i went to as a kid and some old man who was like up there in the church was trying to get me to go with him into a van and i was like oh i should to go help him but then i got scared that he was going to kidnap me. fast forward a few years to when i was 19 and i was raped and on my way home from that i thought about this memory and i was like i was molested. like the thought just popped into my brain i hadn't thought about it in a really long time. i cant really remember clearly like what happened i just know i get like spells of thinking about it and like getting body memories from it and memories about the floor in the van and his beard and the hairs on the back of my neck standing up take over. but i cant like put my finger on like what he did exactly. like ive even passed out when getting these spells. am i making this up? i feel like i cant talk to my therapist about this because if i did i would explode probably lmao pls help
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ptsd
|
Okay so I’ve gone to therapy and been on meds and diagnosed and undiagnosed since...idk I was a young kid. I’ve been abused, neglected etc. throughout my childhood but have *never* been diagnosed with ptsd. I *have* however been diagnosed with ADHD and GAD. I’ve mentioned my thoughts on ptsd to my GP and therapists in the past but they didn’t seem too concerned. But I’ve been noticing I have very specific and unexpected triggers that I can’t put my finger on. I mostly take anti anxiety meds for panic attack’s and it’s helped for a while but....the last time I was caught in the rain walking my dog the rain seemed to trigger a panic attack. I have *no* idea why this happened and not sure if I should seek therapy specifically *for* ptsd? Has anyone else had unexplained triggers or been treated for something else before being diagnosed with ptsd? I’ve had panic attacks before that I could explain...for example, I’ve had two cars totaled at stop lights so my heart feels like it stops when a car pulls up to a stop sign to my right way too fast. Not sure what to do tbh or what my next course of action should be.
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ptsd
|
Howdy, y’all; first-time poster, officially diagnosed with OCD about six years ago now.
I’ve always lived with my room in various states of disarray, ever since I was a kid; lately, it’s been notably worse, my room filled as it is with a couple months’ worth of Depression Mess. I’ve never actually liked living like this, and in fact, it stresses me out, a lot. I hate thinking about the germs that could be all over, and feeling cramped and boxed in by all my clutter.
Annoyingly enough, though, my brain has *also* decided to make cleaning stressful for me, as well. It overwhelms me very easily, to the point where simple questions like, “Which cleaning chemical should I use here,” or, “Where should I put this one particular book,” practically paralyze me with indecision.
So, I guess my question is: Any tips, for how to make this work, and get my brain to shut up long enough to clean? Any advice (or even just commiseration) greatly appreciated.
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OCD
|
Starting uni (or college for you americans) next year. scared im not going to get through it and im going to drop out or loose interest in the subject. im scared about how my adhd might impact my studies. and how much harder itll be for me to complete the courses or cope with them due to rapidly changing interests, focusing skills, time management executive dysfunction, ect.
im doing psychology and im still not 100% sure i want to do psych. i havnt even submitted my applications in yet, idk why i guess im just scared to haha. but im running out of time and need to.
im scared of spending so much money just to not even finish my courses.
anyone else starting uni next year? how are you guys going?
You can use the comment section to vent or share your own experiences and problems, or give advice or support if you want. just comment whatever haha.
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ADHD
|
Hello all. Next year I will be doing a masters in artificial intelligence. I have a lot of catching up to do before hand. I was never really one to study, not even during my degre, I got lucky with my grades.
But now I'm going to have to knuckle down. Any advice, Techniques that I should try to integrate into my studying?
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ADHD
|
Melissa is one of my favorite meditation coaches. Hearing her story really touched me deep inside of my heart. She has a lot of insight and knowledge to share, if you're interested in holistic healing.
Check out the video here: [https://youtu.be/KbpIIi03o1I](https://youtu.be/KbpIIi03o1I)
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ptsd
|
Whenever i exchange songs with friends if the song happens to be of a genre i tend to dislike the very act of listening to it is uncomfortable. I have to skip ahead or just give up in the first 30 seconds because i simply cannot bring myself to finish it - if i do is when i zone out and start browsing instead and realize that i havent really listened to it.
Can anyone here relate?
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ADHD
|
I've been taking the non-stimulant medication Strattera for about 7 weeks. In the middle of week 3, I began seeing notable effects on my concentration and performance in school. This lasted for about 1-2 weeks - and stopped.
​
This makes no sense to me. This medication is supposed to take \~3-4 weeks to start working, but the powers aren't supposed to go away. I'm back to my old habits, completely impaired, paralyzed in front of my work. What's even weirder is that the effects came back a couple weeks ago, for one day. Then for another day a week later. My doctor was also puzzled; he prescribed a 1mg daily dose of Intuniv (guanfacine, another non-stimulant), but I'll start it in January (I don't want to take it during Christmas break). I really wish I could just get a stimulant prescribed; I have no issue with taking non-stimulants, but my grades are only getting worse.
Has anyone else experienced something similar with Strattera? Please let me know.
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ADHD
|
sorry in advance for the long post, I'm mainly venting but was hoping someone might understand my struggles so at least I know I'm not entirely crazy.
​
First off, I'm 30f, not officially diagnosed yet but I'm 90% sure I have ADHD (inattentive or combined). My brother was diagnosed as a child and that took all the attention away from me so I ended up masking the hell out of life. I've been in therapy on and off since I was 12 and have accumulated 6 different diagnoses (including 2 personality disorders) over the years only to realise this past year it's probably all caused by undiagnosed and untreated ADHD.
​
**TL;DR** is basically in the title. I feel like managing my current symptoms would be a full-time job but I can't afford not to work, so I'm stuck in a catch-22 and I'm massively overwhelmed trying to break the cycle.
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I was working on disability when I was still living in my home country (Switzerland) since I was believed to have BPD and AvPD. I moved to the UK 2 years ago doing it on my own, and it's been going okay so far but I'm starting to struggle again. I've never been at the same job for more than 1-2 years, ever. Now I'm 1.5 years into my current job and they've put me on review for performance issues (I work in customer support so very target driven). I love my job and the company so I don't want to leave but it's been so hard to keep up and make my head focus on the rather boring task of replying to the same 15 questions for 9 hours every day. I enjoy being in touch with customers but I get annoyed because I'm bored as hell. I also don't necessarily want to leave because I know I'll have the same issues again with my next job anyway.
They're not being helpful with reducing targets or offering another role, or even more variety ("only if you hit target" -.-) but they're giving me time to figure out some tactics to "get me back to normal". I'm scared that their "normal" is too far out of reach for me at this point, but I've decided to try. I used to be able to over-perform, so it must be possible again, right?
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Anyway, now I've started looking into ways to manage my ADHD but honestly I'm sooo overwhelmed. They ask me weekly about my progress meaning well, but I'm not even sure where to start. My executive function and motivation and focus are so bad, not just at work but in my private life too. I can't even cook for myself. I don't exercise. I always forget to drink water. And no matter how tired I am during the day, I can never fall asleep before 2am which leaves me with 5-6h max. of sleep a night when I naturally need around 8. Even brushing my teeth is hard. I've also developed stress-related tinnitus which has got worse again as well.
I know I have to change my ways but I just can't. There are so many things I both want and have to do but no matter how much I want to try, I just *don't do it*. I'm so frustrated. I know I have to manage my ADHD outside of work to function better at work but because I'm so stressed at work I have no energy to deal with my issues outside of it. It's a vicious cycle.
I feel like managing my ADHD and getting back on track would be a full-time job right now, but I have to figure it out on top of a demanding, target driven 40h work week. I have to keep calling in sick because I'm too overwhelmed to be dealing with customers, my brain just shuts down. And I had my first panic attack in months 2 days ago. They're going to run out of patience and fire me eventually. I think right now they're holding off because of the law (ADHD counts as a disability in the UK) but eventually they'll have a good enough argument if I don't get better, especially since I don't have an official diagnosis.
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I'm scared I'll always be like this because in that case, what's the point. I feel like I'll always be useless. And I can't afford therapy at the moment. I'm on a year-long waiting list to get an ADHD assessment but this doesn't help me right now. :/
I'm tired, man. I'm so, so tired.
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ADHD
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So, I am a huge tech person, I just love it. But recently I have developed this obsession around my computer. I haven't used it for months and I use Linux on it, I am anxious that it has been hacked (aswell as my phone),. Now, here's the worst part, I can't touch my desk (where my computer is) and then touch another device, I feel like my desk will act as a conductor and transmit binary data from my computer to my body or clothes, that will also be used as conductors (like USB), and that x device will be infected like that if I touch it. If anything touches my computer/phone then it would act as a conductor of binary data to another object, and another, another if, until it reached (and infected) another device. It doesn't happen exclusively with my computer, phones and other devices aswell.
Another one is when I see hyperlinks, even if I don't click on them "what if there's an exploit and the contents of that link dangerous" especially when i'm on my phone, because of mistaps.
Also, whenever something weird (or just the littlest bit odd) i instantly get anxious, even if I resist it, it just ends with me taking extreme measures to make sure I'm safe.
I know most of this makes no sense, but the lack of information online about this and correlating how usbs work and how there are constantly exploits makes me feel like it could be somewhat possible, which makes resisting the compulsion of avoiding my PC and not doing constant fresh installs really hard.
I just wanted some advice.
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OCD
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So yesterday night was weird, I meditated and practiced mindfulness for the first time and managed to stop ruminating on my intrusive thoughts, about an hour after doing this, for a brief moment I felt like I was back to normal, I didn’t have any feelings to any of my feared thoughts, I felt at peace and I went to sleep and had normal dreams. Woke up at 7 am however and I still felt normal but I was tired and I went back to sleep, the HOCD dreams went crazy, I found myself constantly being woken up by them and going back to sleep, I barely slept after that it was impossible to sleep, and after ruminating on my dreams all my groinal responses came back with a fury, and my intrusive thoughts felt so much worse, for the first time my penis actually grew a bit from an intrusive thought, this all made for a shit start of the day. I had a feeling this would happen because it always happens on my second sleep cycle so I planned to just not go back to sleep after my first sleep cycle but I thought that would be avoidance so I prayed to have a good sleep and it didn’t work, everything just feels worse
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OCD
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How has it been for people to start dating again, I dated this guy for a month and it turned out awful, I think now he did absolutely nothing wrong but my PTSD took hold and destroyed it, I feel like I will never be able to date again, it feels like a hopeless situation…
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ptsd
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I will try everything people tell because I can't argue at moment. Here is the game plan: diet and exercise.
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depression
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Growing up has never really been easy for me while I understand that everyone has a much more difficult time and I should be grateful. I would still like to wonder if anyone else deals with what I had to go through. I would have to deal with favoritism because I wasn't the perfect child who wanted to do everything my step mom wanted me to do. If something bad happened in the house I would be blamed for it. If I had a meltdown or I would freak out I would be insulted or made fun of for "faking it". I developed some sort of a reflex every time my step mom would raise her hand I would flinch.
I was not even safe from my sibling, as I would be called retard or very hateful things. It would also be very hard for me to get a job because of my disability. Life in general has been difficult.
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aspergers
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Every single little thing is a trigger of past happier memories before trauma -- before when I least expected my life to change. While I wish I could view these memories with fondness, I just get sad... whether it be a written date, place I remember being, a movie I watched in the past, even petting my dog that I remember getting before my trauma.
It's obsessive and stealing me from the present all the time.
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ptsd
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I was there because my dad who was dying wanted to have me live in a safe home, I was misdiagnosed Autistic. As the Autism community lies about having violent people in it, he thought sending me to a "safe place" to live with them was in my best interest. I had to escape before he could send me there. Taking away my life in the belief I was a forever child, enabled by the Autism community that believes those on the spectrum never grow up.
They said my lunch was late, I was starving. I knew they had lunch bags for patients arriving. I asked for one, they said no. I don't understand what insight into someone's mental illness they will gain from starving them. A lot of the therapy such as exposure therapy, seemed like exposing a patient to someone behaving as a hostage taker, enjoying seeing their captive suffer.
I guess I think if I understand I'll feel better, be able to resolve this. As a part of keeping me a dependent forever child my dad made me frightened to go into the kitchen. He knew loud sounds hurt me, so he bought dogs. He knew I was too kind to hurt them and that I'd blame myself for my pain. All this to hold me hostage to his fears of abandonment.
I tell psychologists I have CPTSD, they say I have Autism. I tell them I was traumatized, nearly physically assaulted by an Autistic person. They say it's a spectrum. What cruel monster would put a trauma victim with people who hit others and yell? So if you plan on suggesting I get help, I have tried, all that happens is they put me into the environment which traumatized me. So I'm trying to cope on my own.
I needed to just say this to someone so I'd stop thinking about it. So much of the help from psychologists has been harm.
I was triggered by a video on YT of an Autistic kid who had unknown low blood sugar melting down. 1st how do you post a video saying you can't feed your child with no shame?
2nd someone decided the symptoms of starvation are also a part of Autism. Seem like being a human being in itself is Autism. That being neurotypical is having no reaction to starvation.
I was pushed into a suffocating panic attack in exposure therapy. I ran away terrified. Needing to breathe and escape torture must also be Autism.
And I was looking at the videos to prove Autistic people can be violent, because it's stigmatizing and "ableist" to state such truths. So the victims are made to feel like monsters for not being submissive to violent Autistic behavior.
The white house protests were awful. There may be one good thing that comes of it. No one will be able to invalidate victims of violence done by those with mental illness. If they say mentally ill people don't attack others, then they'll have to explain that reasoning with the protesters.
Perhaps us victims won't have to search for YouTube videos that trigger us to prove we're not lying anymore. Everyone was made to see the truth. It's not stigma to keep others safe. It's not discrimination to have boundaries. None of this would've happened if the US didn't deny the reality of those with mental illness to bring comfort to their enablers.
It shouldn't have had to take a violent protest for people to understand that mentally ill people do traumatize others, they do hurt others. Now they have to reckon with the results of their fight for inclusion.
Although I'll be surprised if they don't go burying their heads back in the sand, and repeating their mantras that mentally ill people are all sweet misunderstood lambs exiled from their flock unfairly. I'm reminded every time I see an Autism Speaks ad, that was carefully created to show only the good side of Autism. They'll just go back to shaming and bullying the victims of their violence with their bullying cry of "ableist".
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ptsd
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I'm not so sure I know anymore. I've just been- surviving. Lots of meds.
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ptsd
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Before OCD, I was relaxed. I didn't care about so much. I lived just like everyone else.
I accepted uncertainty. I lived with questions. Some even had me curious.
Now I feel like a toddler. The simplest things give me anxiety like studying, improving myself, reading, work etc. I start asking myself questions and get completely stressed out. I deal with a lot of existential and moral OCD.
I don't really work anymore. I haven't studied for months. I hide and play games or watch TV inside to avoid life. To avoid responsibility. To avoid even the things I used to love to do. Please believe me, I don't want to. I do it to hide from the world. To protect myself from myself.
I fantasize about death a lot. I'm not planning on killing myself but I think about it A LOT. I'm **not** suicidal but I just really look forward to my life ending. The blankness. The peace. The carelessness. I almost crave it. However I have no plans to kill myself and I don't want anyone to think I do.
I don't want children a family or a gf. I'm not even close to being able to be ok with that.
However, I don't want anyone to think you can't have those things with OCD. You **absolutely** can and if that's what you want I'm really happy for you. I really really am. It's just not for me. I don't want it to be.
I'm sorry for anyone who ever goes through this disorder. I hope you all get the lives you've always wanted. OCD or not
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OCD
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So I've officially been diagnosed with combined type ADHD by a UK private psychiatrist back in march of this year. He also works as an NHS psychiatrist for a CMHT unit in Cardiff. After my diagnosis he had to prioritize his NHS work over his private patients which I completely understand as that's his main job. But, he unfortunately had to close his private practices before I could even start medication. Mainly because he didn't want to start me on stimulants and then not be able to carry on providing scripts after the practice finally closed.
I saw this as only logical and him trying to be ethical.
So on my last session seeing him, we both agreed to transfer the care to the NHS. As frustrating as it was not being able to start medication, this is where it gets even worse.
Backtracking to 2016 for a moment, I saw an NHS psychiatrist at my local CMHT service to my county. She wasn't very helpful, very agressive in her ways of asking questions, didn't feel like she fully understood why I was there. I left that consultation, with no medication, no help and very frustrated because even though she could see my symptoms of ADHD she thought that "it wasn't enough to warrant me starting medication"
Fast track forward to after march, my private Psych sent everything over including letters and the assessment to my GP to make a referral to my local CMHT service. This was literally to just start a shared care protocol to start medication. I didn't see or hear anything off anyone for weeks. Then I get a letter in the post about a video call for November. I wait.
Then today I have a video call with the same person I saw back in 2016, and instead of reading the previous assessment by the private psychiatrist (practically ignoring it exists), she took me through, the previous questionnaire that I went through back in 2016, and also read back on her previous notes and basically came to the same conclusion that even though I have had an official diagnosis, she thinks in her opinion, my symptoms arent enough to warrant me starting medication. Which in all honesty I think is absolute bullshit.
So after all of this, I've lost money and not started treatment. Can someone please advise me on where i can go next because after today's phone call i really do not know what to do.
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ADHD
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At the end of 2020 I (14f) started to suspect I had adhd after reading about it. I obviously researched it a lot more after and am still learning more about it, I'm now about 99% sure I do have it. I don't think it's very serious because I have heard that a lot of people literally can barely function with it and I can generally take care of myself.
After a couple of attempts, I was able to convince mom that I do have it (she didn't believe me at first) with a list of things that I do everyday that are related to ADHD and that I have noticed no one else does.
Again, I'm not sure if I should talk to a doctor because even though I do everything at last minute, I can usually get it done in time. I'm worrying on what to do now and would love some advice from anyone who knows about this. At what extent should I start considering getting it checked out?
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ADHD
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(TRIGGER WARNING)
Sorry, I'm new to all this, but I'm kinda going through allot right now.
SO... over the past 2 months or so, seemingly out of nowhere, I started dealing with some pretty severe anxiety/panic attacks, only to later find out after so much research, that I am suffering from different forms of OCD, and have been throughout my life. However, it was never this bad, and when I was oblivious as to what OCD really was, I never really had any of these anxiety attacks, or severe obsessions. Or at least not as bad as they are now.
Basically, the core root of my problems, is the intense fear of going insane, constantly questioning my minds ability to develop a severe mental illness such as schizophrenia, dementia, or borderline personality disorder, psychosis, ext ext, and my intrusive thoughts have been latching onto these fears recently.
Now, what made things **INFINITELY** worse. I started searching for celebrities and noteworthy people who also suffer/suffered from OCD. I found a page that went through a bunch of different people who suffered from this cursed disease, and with that, I actually found so much solace and relief. Think Darwin, DiCaprio, Howard Hughes, ext. ext.
Unfortunately, that solace quickly turned into severe distress as I neared the bottom of the list. The background and information on two particular individuals are the sole cause of the "harm OCD" im suffering from. It listed the Sandy Hook shooter and the dark knight move theater shooter as people who suffered from anxiety and OCD that progressively got much worse throughout their lives. Naturally, like a moron, I did a deep dive on the background of these two individuals, because ur brain wants to know **"just how bad can OCD and anxiety get?"**. As such, I became horrified. Now obviously, these two had some SERIOUS mental issues and their horrendous actions probably weren't solely caused by anxiety and OCD, but the fact that they also suffered from anxiety and OCD was enough for my brain to become fixated and terrified. "Here are two individuals with anxiety and OCD, one of whom was apparently easygoing and even graduated college, that lost total control and did the most horrific things the human mind can imagine."
Im 1000% positive that if I hadn't read about these two, I would NOT be suffering like I am now. This "Harm OCD" all started simply after reading about them, and was not even a problem until now. Im guessing my intrusive thoughts just latched onto these fears....?
I believe it causes me severe distress because I, as a person, am overly compassionate and deeply care about other people. I will go out of my way to help a stranger in any way that I can, so, maybe im having this harm OCD because the intrusive thoughts are completely antithetical and contradictory to who I am as a person.
I even want to become a police officer solely due to the fact that it is a profession where I can potentially make a difference in someones life, or save someone. But, at the same time, throughout my life and even today, I did always have a fascination with wars/combat, and my brain tries to look for any similarities like that...... and it sucks... allot. I even made a pact with myself to take my own life if it ever got so bad, just so I wouldn't be able to hurt anyone. I don't know what to do,
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OCD
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To start off I have a tickle kink big whoop everyone does but what worries me is I remember when I was 12 had this fantasy of me bring restrained but having kids tickle me like prob 7 ish and I want to know is that wrong? Or is my OCD making it out as wrong? Or was I just a kid?
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OCD
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Long story short I got into a fight with my fiancé this morning. She said I am having difficulty understanding her feelings. She is accusing me of emotionally cheating on her with a friend of mine who also has autism, and that we should try couples consoling because I have Aspergers and don’t understand what she is trying to tell me in regards to boundaries. Everything about the friendship is strictly platonic. I even talked to my friend about the issue so no lines get crossed and my fiancé is still mad. I’m so confused. I agree with her because I do have issues with understanding emotions, but my friend and I just text back and forth on occasion. If this was a problem before why is she mentioning it after we got engaged and are planning a wedding? I told her everything was okay and that we should still look into it but a part of me is so mad and sad. What should I do? Is there anyone in a similar relationship like this one who has any advice?
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aspergers
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As above. I can't look after myself but I can't get better until I do. I have no motivation or desire to really improve my lot. I want to be happier but then start finding reasons not to and just don't have the energy to sort myself out. Is there a way to break the cycle? Outside help not an option as no one cares.
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depression
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I don't want to post about my exact theme on here because I don't want to trigger reassurance-seeking in others, but you read about my obsession-theme in my post history.
I could really use any input, any encouraging words, advice, etc. I'm really really struggling with my theme today and I'm honestly not sure what to do or where to turn.
Trigger warning: my obsession deals with themes about sexual assault.
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OCD
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Hi all, I'm feeling depressed, cos I realise that I have no money, no work, no talents... I'm really useless. And I don't have a supportive family as well. Sometimes I wish I can just disappear from earth faster, because there's really no point being on earth.
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depression
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The day that I will freak the fuck out a million times. He doesn’t even seem to care about not helping. Frankly I don’t know how to handle that day on my own.
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ptsd
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First time poster. I've created a perfect storm for myself and now I'm panicked, paralyzed, and overwhelmed. I lost my job back in June in part, because of being unable to meet deadlines (mostly due to a lack of motivation and being distracted by other things happening in my life at the time). I didn't really think much of it, because I didn't really like the job any way and I've been enrolled in a graduate program. I thought it would be a great opportunity just to stop working for a while and focus 100% on school. Problem is: with little structure, I spent most of my new free time doing everything else BUT school work which led to an incomplete for my second semester (which is about to turn into a failure). This semester, I signed up for two more classes (paid for from my savings) - and did well for the first part of the semester - then fell off the bandwagon which I'm mad at myself about because I actually really like one of the professors and he could have been a really good reference down the road (not any more though). In the meantime, I forgot that because I'm not working anymore I'd have to apply for financial aid for the next few semesters - as of yesterday, my tuition bill is now over due and I'm about to be locked out of registering for classes until I figure out how I'm going to pay for it (registration starts tomorrow!). I freaked out last night and filled out my FASFA and emailed the financial aid office at the school asking them what I should do. In the meantime, I have to have a call with my academic advisor and the financial services people within the next day or so to explain to them my situation - I'm embarrassed that I put myself in this situation with all my procrastinating and being overwhelmed is making it nearly impossible for me to think rationally about any of this. My brain is going at 1000000 mph and I know I need help, but the mess I made for myself has put me in a spot where I don't even know where to begin. I'm freaked out about not being able to pay for school and having to defer a semester and go back to work in a field that I absolutely hate. The unpaid bills, missed deadlines, unanswered emails and telephone calls, stacks of unopened mail, and ruined relationships are looming over me right now and all I want to do is curl up in a ball and cry because at the end of the day this is all my fault.
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ADHD
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I have been suffering from it for like 5 years now and over the years I thought that It is only me who is exposed to or comes in contact with the thing that I fear ( the contaminant ). Over the years I saw people doing and being in situations that I can never think of.
The truth is people who do not suffer from OCD also come in contact with stuff that is very anxiety provoking or stressful for people with OCD. They just simply shrug it off. They just don't care. They just continue with their lives.
If 2 people one with OCD and without OCD walk from point A to B. It's not that luck or god hates us and something bad will happen with the person suffering from OCD yet the person will have 100 questions along the way. Did this happen? Did that happen? Did that thing touched me? yes? no? Meanwhile the other Person just won't care.
I know it sounds very simple but it took me years to realise it. My OCD was only getting worse until I realised this. I thought I was the only one that will be spat on if I go outside. I am the only one among my peers that has to live with this or that Contamination. Well, I have seen one of my friends walk barefoot on the streets which I in a million years can never do. Maybe one day I can.
People like us who suffer from OCD have the high tendency to analyse things as we are smart and intelligent people and I have myself as a proof for it. I was great at Economics and subjects that involved analysis. I was a A+ student and aced every exam that analysis in it. OCD capitalised on this skill of mine and made me miserable. It's about time I know how to fight back.
Have a great day!
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OCD
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I’m new to this sub and recently have acknowledged my ocd. I have intrusive thoughts along with false memories and it causes some sort of identity crisis. I haven’t seen a therapist yet but I’m scheduled next week. At this point, I’d try medication and therapy. I’m lost and deteriorating but so scared to be on medications. The idea of medication causes so much anxiety and worry. What’s to be expected?
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OCD
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I’m 20 years old studying at a university. Outside of my school I have a parttime job to pay for my bills, pay for my school and of course buy stuf that I like. I have been working since 15 years old (it’s a common thing in the Netherlands). I always try to find jobs that I like but every time after a couple of months I start to hate the job that I do. I’m now working in a electronics store for about 6 month and I really loved the job when I started. Now I just don’t want to go to work anymore and it really frustrates me because I have this at every job. The job is a bit the same everyday I meet new costumers every day and the conversation are never the same but I still have to do the same tasks everyday.
And I have had this on every job that I’ve had causing me to work less hard with results in getting fired.
I’m afraid that when I finish uni and work a full time job I will just lose my interest as quick as the jobs that I have had.
Do you guys have the same experience and maybe any tips to keep have fun in you’re job and not losing interest 😭.
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ADHD
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Hi! You are here at reddit means you have found a place where people can relate with you and you with them.
I joined Reddit with the same hope.
I live in India. I was diagnosed with OCD in 2018 .
The anxiety is on and off and on and off .
But the past 2-3 days are just so triggering . I can't cope up anymore . Might be the reason I'm here today .
The theme is about feeding stray dogs.
I get triggered from almost every street dog .
One night I took Whiskey(My Dog) for a walk , and we have like 3 street dogs near our house, and I got a thought that what if they haven't eaten anything since Morning which was highly possible . I don't know what happened but suddenly I got anxious , pain in my stomach , chest, increased heartbeat and an urge to keep thinking about this . I was pretty sure that this anxiety wasn't due to the empathy for the dogs. I came back home and tried to distract myself from it but it kept on increasing , the Anxiety basically said me that I have to start feeding them daily . And I guess this was the trigger , that I have to now compulsively feed them even when I'm not doing this from heart or tbh the reason was that I don't want to do it . Call it a selfish reason if you want but no I don't want to be forced by my brain to do something when I clearly don't want to do it , I am not in a mental state where I can take one more responsibility.
This fight in my brain remained for a day or two and then I finally went with a packet of dog biscuits to go and feed them , obviously they were new for them so they didn't eat it in starting . They sleep in front of a very big home around a guard . I asked him whether anyone feed them or not and he said plenty of people feed them from 3 houses he know ,daily . Even my Uncle feed these three dogs almost daily. I got to know this when I came back home.
I went home with a sigh of relief that finally these dogs are getting food , they don't remain hungry and yes I will not deny this but most of the relief I got was from the fact that I will now not remain anxious and force myself to feed them even though when I don't want to .
This anxiety vanished for 2-3 days but I still had a fear that it will present itself again citing some other dog I see . Now I don't have the record for every dog I see , so whenever I used to take Whiskey for a walk and when I used to see a new stray dog , I used to get triggered and all those thoughts used to repeat themselves. One of them was to make a plan, or start an NGO which can cover maximum number of dogs and a well thought plan so that every dog can be fed and this way I will not be anxious anymore . Again , none of this was coming from my heart , all of this was forced .
Today I saw two dogs near a market and one of them was very thin and those thoughts started triggering me again . I knew the cycle that was going to be presented to me. There was a guard sitting outside the house , I went to him with hope that he will say that yes people feed them and then I'll again go home in peace . But he said No , no one feeds them , I went to another guard and asked him and he denied too and said ki "No one wants to feed these dogs ."
Now I have to make a plan ? Now I have to think about this ? I knew how my next few hours were going to be like , I'm still convincing myself or explaining to myself that I know it's a very pure thing to do , it's the most human thing one can do , that I know I have a potential to do it but I don't want to . Period , I don't want to . Not because I'm a cruel person , not because I think less of dogs or animals , not because they shouldn't be fed , but because it feels like a pressure , it feels like a responsibility that I don't want to take rn , it doesn't feel pure to me because I'm not mentally equipped to do it. I am working to drink one bottle of water in a day and I fail , I can't take responsibility of myself properly , I can't take responsibility of a dog that is in my house , how do you expect me to take responsibility of two more dogs? I can't , I just can't I'm sorry . Even though if I start it , feeding those two dogs daily , it will ruin my whole day , it will ruin my whole mental peace , yes it will make me feel happy looking at these faces when they eat food but I will be still at home worrying about the next day and thinking how much I don't want to do this and how much is it eating my mind. I have no solution , no solution at all , this thing will eat me up , it will eat me up if I don't start feeding them , it will eat me up if I'll start feeding them .I don't know.
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OCD
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For those of us who reached a higher education. How did you do it? How long did it take? It’s taking me too long to get a simple bachelor’s. It’s not like the work is hard…I just don’t do it. I hate it. I went from an A student to becoming a borderline drop out and the scariest part is that it’s still not enough for me to do my work. I want my degree, I want to say I earned that piece of paper.
Edit*
Great to see the thread full of success stories regardless of how long it took. Atleast we share determination for the things we really want.
Edit**
Shits not fair. So many of us have gone far in life and reached their dreams only after years of trials and errors. Having to dedicate half of our energy just to walk straight. Stuck in a loop of “I’m going to forget this moment and this task in 10 minutes. I’ll only enjoy this great activity that I’m good at for a month maybe a year if I take 4 breaks in between.”
Why doesn’t any spitball just stick.
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ADHD
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So my grandmas dog had to be put down a couple days back, since he was getting old and had hip problems, diabetes and liver failure, and they just couldn't afford any treatment. I've been sad and crying these past few nights over it. However, on top of that, my OCD is now telling me "if you do that for 9 more times, your dog is gonna live for 9 years". My dog is 8 years old and he's not yet showing signs of getting old. How should I go about easing the obsessive thoughts? I'm sad enough as it is, I don't need OCD to make me anxious
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OCD
|
I was having bad nightmares for years. I didn't want to think I had PTSD back then. Eventually my psychiatrist told me I might have it and that it's so bad that they wanted to prescribe me this new experimental medication. She told me it was a blood-pressure medication with an unlabeled use for stopping dreaming. I politely told her no because the concept seemed too science fiction and disturbing to me. I guess I have the belief that human beings need to dream in order to sort of repair themselves emotionally or something. I just feel like dreams are an important thing for humans to have, otherwise they wouldn't exist.
​
I'm curious though. Has anyone here been prescribed or using Prazosin? What type of effects do you experience? Does it take away nightmares but leave normal dreams or does it end all dreams completely? Does it have any side effects? Does it help you?
​
Thanks.
|
ptsd
|
On all of our souls.
I want to feel again.
I NEED to feel again.
|
ptsd
|
Hey everyone, I'm new to the group. I'm looking for help or advice because I don't know what to do anymore, my mental health and wellbeing is spiraling out of control and I can't handle life anymore.
Five years ago I lost my daughter to Sepsis the hospital was to blame and its left me with anxiety, depression and ptsd.
She was sick for a little bit we took her to the hospital and they failed us, they didn't complete any of the tests properly didn't follow any guidelines and it resulted in her death I was there I saw her go I was stood at the end of the bed watching them trying to bring her back I held her afterwards and she's gone and now I'm loosing my mind. My moods are all over the place, I'm angry so so angry but I'm also feeling lost and scared and low. Since her passing my personal health has got bad I've put on almost 6 stone in weight I've lost all motivation to want to do anything, I don't enjoy my hobbies any more I resent my life, my family and recently my hyper vigilance has been driving me crazy and its focused around my son all he has to do is cough and I panic I completely withdraw go in to a full meltdown it's so bad I even hyperventilate now. I panic when he isn't near me (when he is at school etc) I panic if anyone asks me to go out because I don't feel I can be tied up. I HAVE TO BE AVAILABLE at all times, ready to jump at a moments notice but this bit covers my wife too. She's disabled I'm her carer so I constantly have to be there for her I'm on tender hooks 24/7.
And the only mental health help I can get is about 9 months away, meanwhile the only interim care is a mental health nurse that I can see for an hour every two weeks 😔. I'm loosing my mind I want to be normal again. I want to be able to spend time with my kids without being scared of them, I want my wife to be able to hug me without me flinching (I don't know why I do it). I want to wake up feeling good go to bed the same and wake up the same the following day and it's not happening I'm all over the place each day different to the last 😔. But one of the worse things is its getting worse.
I have intrusive thoughts all the damn time, flash backs, nightmares.... I did have a cause of emdr therapy years ago but its effects have long worn off.
I have this guilt that I can't get rid of. I was her daddy I was supposed to protect her and look after her but I couldn't do anything I was so helpless and that's eating me up I've been told by doctors, paediatricians, nurses that there was nothing I could of done NOTHING but that gives me no solace. Most days I feel an emptiness a big black dark abyss in the centre of my fractured soul and its always there it never leaves me alone
Some days I can fight it but mostly I'm loosing to it, On the bad days I get the negative thoughts "the pain will go if I'm not here" thoughts. I won't do anything I can't I have to much responsibility, my wife my kids, they keep me going but alot of the time I don't want to.
I don't know what to do.
|
ptsd
|
So I have prescription for Adderall (10mg twice a day). I don’t like taking it every day, but when I do take it, I usually just take both doses at once and it works great for me. I can’t find the brand on the pill bottle but they’re light blue ovalish shaped pills. I switched pharmacies and my new pills are dark blue circles (still 10mg). I took two this morning and it feels completely different… like I accidentally just got high off of my prescription. I hadn’t eaten anything before but I had some yogurt right after taking so idk if that changes anything or maybe this new prescription is stronger? I did some light research and it says that’s basically not possible but I’m just wondering if anyone has had a similar experience or knows what makes the pills feel stronger.
|
ADHD
|
I miss my dad. (alive not able to be near me)
I’m just taking hit after hit at this point.
I can’t do it.
|
depression
|
I am questioning everything. And Im scared sometimes what if what I think are intrusive thoughts are just passing thoughts but Im like forcing myself to believe they are intrusive thoughts for reassurance? Am I in denial of what those thoughts say then? stuff like that aaa TT
|
OCD
|
Male, 17 During quarantine, I was a big mess and was in a deep depression I normally have a bunch of AP classes and during quarantine, I was sent to a psychiatric ward during that time and was not passing the class, In this new year I am much better mentally but before I put so much pressure on school and to have a high GPA but now while I still have all AP classes right now I am failing calculus bc and my parents have always been on me when it comes to school but now I don't seem to worry as much about it because I don't push myself as hard as I used to I think if I pushed myself the way I did before I would get depressed again but my parents also want me to get good grades just would like to hear others about my predicament. Thx for reading
|
depression
|
Don't get me wrong, I know that a lot of people on the spectrum — myself included — can be out of their element, but I just find it incredibly annoying when people think you're addressing them specifically in a conversation that several people are a part of. For instance, whenever I asked a question in my former roommates' group text, one of my roommates (who I'm pretty sure is also autistic) seemed to always assume that I was asking him, like when I asked who took my dishes, he'd say something along the lines of "wasn't me, I don't use the upstairs kitchen". Or more recently, in a FB group chat, I recommended a metal band primarily to a couple of my friends in the chat, and this one guy who pretty much never has anything worth contributing to most of our discussions said "I'm not into metal, sorry". Then there's also the people who are clearly talking out of their asses and/or have no clue what I'm actually talking about, especially on serious and personal matters to me, which they attempt to make some dumb joke out of. It's really growing rather irksome.
|
aspergers
|
It seems a lot of my old friends and ex girlfriend have moved on with their lives and seem happy but damn I'm still so stuck on the past because my life hasn't been interesting or happy since late 2019 maybe early 2020.
Anyone else struggle with being stuck in the past?
|
depression
|
For starters, suicide attempts generally have a moderately high survival rate (depending on the method) . Which means, even if I went through with it, I could remain a fucking comatose my entire life or worse, profoundly more disabled.
Secondly, I can't even be assed to arrange the plans, too much goodbyes and farewells, arriving door to door like some Jehovah's Witness just to say "Yeah peace out, n-words." (refer to my post history please before you guys start complaining)
Thirdly, I'm just exhausted of shit, it feels like God put me on this world to punish me. So fuck it, why not play His game and beat him?
I don't know what or why am telling you guys this buuuut if you know anyone who can provide risin poisoning or other euthanasia kit, I wouldn't mind.
Can't lie, this is a drag.
|
aspergers
|
It’s 5:00am the morning after Thanksgiving. We didn’t even eat Thanksgiving dinner together as a family. My parents are miserable together- they spent the entire week yelling and fighting, and there’s always this uncomfortable tension in the house.
I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, or why things keep on getting worse. I’m a HS junior who has slowly watched my standards drop from having straight A’s with 5 AP classes, to crying every night. Staying up late, not doing homework, failing tests, I’m watching my friends distance themselves and the people I love become disappointed in me. Sophomore year, during COVID, I was insanely depressed but somehow, even though every external factor is better now, my mental health is even worse.
I’m having panic attacks, memory loss, I sleep way too much or not at all. I haven’t worked out in months. I’ve ruined every single one of my teenage years by being depressed and anxious.
This is the first time, though, that depression has started to put my future at risk. The most concerning part is that I don’t care. I couldn’t care less about my future. I’ve worked so hard in school but my dad is literally gambling away my future and we’re hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt. My mother ignores his abuse towards me because he controls all the finances so she’s trapped.
It makes me cry realizing that every single dream I’ve had as a child has been crushed by my miserable reality. I’m at the end of my rope. I really am. Nothing I could ever have in life would make what I’ve gone through worth it.
I’ll go back to school after thanksgiving break, and smile when someone asks how my break went. I am falling apart inside. I have been, for a long time, but no one has to know that.
|
depression
|
I'm suffering so much in this disgusting loneliness. Ive been pushed away from everyone cause I'm bipolar. I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I never deserved this much pain.
|
depression
|
1. Bad thoughts on my mind and I can’t “remove” them, like: while eating meat, I’m thinking about dead pigs in pool of blood or other animals, when masturbating having disgusting sexual thoughts that take my appetite away
2. Washing hands very often
3. Can’t stand when things aren’t in order or symmetrical
4. Thoughts like “if you won’t do xy now, you’ll get sick”.
If I do have, what can I do with it?
|
OCD
|
uh ye so convocation for my school just happend im on honors but its very bad my mom got mad cuz of all her expectation and now i dont even have courage to face her and we live in the same house it sucks so much to know how much she expects from me back then when i used to do really well it was since im in a very small school and things were way easier back then but now im in a bigger school theres around 50 of us in class and its the "top class" out of all 5 section u guys got any ideas on what i should do?
|
depression
|
I'm late on an assignment that ive spent so much time on. I cant get myself to sit down and write it, my brain just poops out everytime I try. I finally got over the shame i felt for turning in assignments late or poor performance for a paper or a presentation. But without the shame it feels like i have no motivation to do the work. I love doing the work too just sometimes writing a paper can be daunting and i have to fight my brain every step of the way on this one.
I also found out that im spending 50-100% more time every week on school than my peers. I spend more effort and more time and get less results.
Also today i started filling out forms for accomodations and disability at my school and i just started crying in public and had to leave. I have no idea why. I cried after realizing i needed accomodations too. I don't even know what accomodations to ask for. (if you have had accomodations in the past please lmk what helped you)
|
ADHD
|
Hello and Thank You, to whoever is reading this. I am a 21 year-old Male in the US. I am also Undocumented. If you saw me in public, you’d most likely deem me unapproachable. My tall physique and unintentional tendency to stare, probably doesn’t help that cause. I often feel as if the world and myself are incompatible. I have dreams; most last only a day or two before turning into ultimately different dreams. The biggest goal of mine is to make music for a living; to create. I find art (music in particular) to be the greatest invention our species. Its influence is boundless as it came before us and will continue to be there afterwards. It is the only thing that gives me hope: that one day I could potentially allow others into my inverted world and see the same colors I do. But life is hard. Like many of you, I love making others laugh or happy. Yet, I’ve been a sad person for as long as I can remember. Not to mention paranoid. I find this paranoia so intense that I fear my ultimate dream, should it be fulfilled, may not be enough to fill the void. I don’t really know what I’m trying to say here (I’m sure you all can relate to that). I don’t even know if I have ADHD. Maybe my best friend, who I tried to confide in by telling him I suspect I have this disorder was right in saying I “just want to be a victim”. I don’t know. Rarely do I ever post on Reddit or any social media, really, but I thought I would stop by and say hello. Thanks for reading all the way through.
|
ADHD
|
I know people with ADHD struggle a lot with time management, time blindness etc. I suspect aspergers, but I've always struggled with time and there is not a lot of info online about aspergers and time blindness.
|
aspergers
|
I’m currently in a psychiatric hospital and yesterday (after 2 weeks) they diagnosed me with ASD, anxiety and ADD. I was told I don’t have BPD but I have traits as a result of my other disorders. I have all 9 traits of the criteria for BPD. I’m meeting with my psychologist today to speak more about my diagnosis. I was so so disappointed to hear I don’t have BPD. Not that I’d ever want it but I would feel more heard. I feel as though most people with ASD & ADD do not have mood fluctuations, black & white thinking, impulsivity etc. to the same point as I do. I’ll be treated the same way someone with BPD is being treated i.e. given mood stabilisers and will be referred a DBT course soon. What do I say to psychologist today?
|
aspergers
|
I feel like this has totally screwed my sleep schedule and mental health, obviously can’t treat ptsd right if my sleep schedule is this messed up but it’s the cause of it :( argh I feel like I’m in a dumb endless loop.
|
ptsd
|
I'm not religious, however, I do keep engaging in these 'prayer' like things (I basically recite all of my intrusive thoughts content but basically say that those things won't happen/aren't true, etc.) for one of my compulsions. I do this every night before everyone sleeps and say one for my father and mother and then say goodnight at the end of the prayer with 'everything will be ok.' (Idk I need to say this or I feel too anxious at night). But, apparently, I've been growing more aggressive when doing this according to my family, like in terms of gesticulation of my arms and just twitching and even just behavior wise. Apparently I get more excitable but in a more aggressive way. Is this normal?
|
OCD
|
I hate my life I get attached very quickly but I have trust issues my "x" cheated on me with FIVE of friends and now I don't have anything im a over thinker full of fucking self-doubt I hate my fucking life I wish I died instead of my older brother then maybe my family would be happier most nights I cry to myself wishing the day didn't go the way it did and end up wishing that I don't wake up the next day but here I am stuck living a fucking pathetic life where I can't do anything im fucking worthless there's nothing for me I should end it all I'm just over it (don't get it wrong this isn't about my x that happend 2 years ago)
|
depression
|
do u guys think severe ocd can cause you to self sabotage? ive been doing things i know im not supposed to do and when i get more scared and think about it more, it gets worse and i do it even more.
|
OCD
|
Context: I have recently been diagnosed with autism (25F). This took several sessions with a specialist before they were able to provide a diagnosis, and along the way they noticed that I also have many ADHD traits and so referred me to a psychiatrist to discuss this.
I met up with the psychiatrist and within 1 session they said they think I do not have ADHD and that concluded that. They said although I do have lots of the symptoms (extreme executive dysfunction, unable to concentrate, inability to stick to routine, thoughts always everywhere at once, lifelong insomnia, have gone through many phases of addiction etc), I am not ‘impulsive enough’ and ‘do not feel as though there is a battery of constant energy inside of me’.
I asked for him to give an example of impulsiveness, and he said ‘when you are buying clothes online or ordering food, do you spend a lot of time doing so?’ I said yes I’m usually rather paralysed by decisions like this. And he said there you go, you aren’t impulsive.
My question is, are people with ADHD always and mandatorily ‘impulsive?’
Although I understand that autism shares many adhd symptoms, I still feel as though his verdict was rushed, potentially incorrect and, from my personal research, overlooks the possibility of ADHD-PI?
|
ADHD
|
I have OCD where I have to watch the coffee pouring into the cup. If someone talks to me or a I hear a distracting sound while I'm pouring my coffee then I get mad. Does anyone have an advice to get rid of this OCD?
|
OCD
|
Currently partially hospitalized as I have been dealing with obsessions and a few mental compulsions (usually just thinking about things until I feel like they’re right) that led to me withdrawing from college (though I’m re-enrolled for next semester.) I’m doing ERP, but I’m barely exhibiting anxiety responses to any of the exposures thus far. I have no idea how I would even attack Pure O. Does ERP even work on Pure O? I want to lead a normal life, and hopefully get off medication eventually, but things are looking bleak. I feel like such an odd case.
|
OCD
|
I’m very suspicious that I have ocd and have a doctors appointment in April to find out.
Given I actually have OCD, I sometimes have really bad days with lots of ocd symtoms, and sometimes I go almost a whole day without any obsessive or intrusive thoughts. Is this normal?
|
OCD
|
I'm what you would call as a human trash.
I'm absolutely nothing and worthless, a disappointment and a waste of life.
I feel like life is pointless, ass I do is go to bed and eat, shit, and piss.
I have no motivation, the hypes from few years ago have dissapeared. Nowhere to be found.
I don't want to do anything, not study, play games, go outside, go to work, hanging out, don't have any... like I'm being serious here, ANY motivation at all. I don't know what the fuck is going on, I tried my BEST to find the hype again, but it seems like the pain in my chest just tell me to do otherwise.
Everything is just pointless, no I don't feel suicidal. But I just don't find the hype in life like how I used to be. I just don't want to do anything in life than just sleep and eat and finally die.
I don't have a single motivation to do anything. Except me bragging all of these shits on reddit of course.
I just want to tell everyone of how useless of a human being I am.
|
depression
|
Okayy update on my previous post— i got the name of the meds wrong. Backstory again: I’ve been on Vyvanse for almost a year, Zoloft for a month, and now my NP is now trying to get me on 0.1 of Clonidine when I told her that the Vyvanse isn’t working as strongly/ as intended after beginning the Zoloft.
I really like Vyvanse. I think it’s been the best option for me from the other stimulants. Although, it doesn’t work as well days that I can’t get enough sleep… which has been a major issue lately.
I was asked to be put on a higher dosage, but instead was prescribed Clonidine for sleep in conjunction with ADHD….has anyone had any luck with this combo? Or did anyone find that their anti depressants weakened the effects of the stimulant??
I’m realllyyy hesitant on starting clonidine because I don’t want too many meds. I prefer taking as little as necessary. If anyone has some success stories though, I might feel a little more comfortable!!
|
ADHD
|
Hey everyone, I have pure O and overcame intrusive thoughts a couple years ago and things were going well but recently I developed a new irrational fear which I can’t seem to shake. Is this normal?
|
OCD
|
TL;DR is I fucked up and hurt someone and they distanced themselves from me, instead of giving them space I kept trying to reach out to them and apologise.
I tried to keep a distance but every single time my mind just swivels out of control with negative thoughts of how I should apologise and otherwise they'll never return and my mind keeps echoing it nonstop until I try to reach out again.
What the hell do I do, my impulsive side of ADD is literally ruining everything and I feel absolutely terrible for it.
|
ADHD
|
Sometimes i had ocd Feelings witouth knowing what i need to do. I don't know what is Wrong with me (sorry for my trashy english)
|
OCD
|
I struggle with the “if I put my sock on wrong” and if I don’t restart this part then this will happen type of OCD. I made a promise to myself to keep pushing thru every compulsion, and eventually when my character is almost maxed out I can look at him and be proud I didn’t give in to any urges, and I can carry this accomplishment thru other aspects of my life.
I’ve done pretty well so far, every clean-slate compulsion I have, I force myself through it and I’m pretty proud of myself until I got to a certain point. I was talking to somebody and I gave them my email for reasons. My email is linked to my account I play the Witcher on, and my brain made a new avenue for my distress to go through, and I know for a fact they didn’t get my password or inside my email and they can’t mess with my game. I was hooked on this game and it took a lot of stress off me and kept my mind off certain things. Now it doesn’t seem enjoyable to me, and I just wanna keep playing. Is there any advice someone can offer me I would really appreciate it.
I was also thinking of getting a tattoo of the eye symbol above the character option. Cuz I haven’t really given into a compulsion yet and it will be a reminder that’ll help me, but I just need to get passed this dumb dilemma
|
OCD
|
I'm 23 M .
I have ADHD , i knew for years now but my mom kept denying it ( even tho she is a doctor ) , so I went to specialist and I was indeed diagnosed with ADHD with a score of 73 on WURS scale. Also I got a score of 7/9 on DIVA-5 test for ADHD on adult life.
My doctor prescribed me Methylphenidate 18 mg ( I can only find Concentra in my area ) , and TRITTICO 50 mg / day every night. This is my first time taking meds as i was always careful and scared of pharmacy .
Any tips ? I'm freaking out a bit.
|
ADHD
|
fuck my dad and fuck my mom. they ruined my fucking life. i am TRAUMATIZED AND MY BRAIN LITERALLY CANNOT FUNCTION LIKE NORMAL. and they have the audacity to blow up my phone and guilt trip and gasLIGHT ME for distancing and basically cutting them out of my life. a week ago my father tried to kick my door down and damaged my front door because he didn’t like that i lived with my bf in my own house that I PAY FOR AND LIVE IN LEGALLY AS AN ADULT. i had to call the police on my fucking parents. and now that i officially stopped responding to them as of last wednesday they have no sense of awareness and have blamed me for ruining their lives and treating them like shit because i won’t speak to them nor my sister who also caused them to show up at my front door in the first place. i have texts of my dad actually being a shithead and since i can’t post i’ll just copy and paste :)
—————-
-tuesday at 8:42 pm
“Enjoy your space..living like a shit with shit people....with a piece a shit.../Forget about me./ come back home tomorrow ...leave this rat hole...come with us...or forget about us... WE DON'T DESERVE WHAT YOU DID WITH US... YOUR CHOICE.. YOU HAVE 24 HOURS...THAN FORGET ABOUT US..I'M SERIOUS... DON'T EVEN COME TO OUR FUNERAL... YOU DISGRACED US.”
-wednesday at 6:54 pm
“i need to know if you want me to pick you up”
-friday at 3:48 am!!!!
“Come home my daughter... what are you doing with your life? You don't have the maturity to live this life... you don't need that... you don't need to go through this situation... what we did to you to deserve what you're doing with us. Come home...we forgive you...you need medical treatment...you can't live here alone...you're missing the blessing of God and your parents...come back with us and we'll get medical treatment for you. Leave this life to the past and come back with us... we don't have much time here anymore. You're destroying our lives... you threw AWAY all the teachings we gave you. You broke your parents' hearts... I don't have the courage to talk to our family and anyone else about what you've done. May God have MERCY in your life and touch your heart and mind... Honor father and mother and that's not what you gave us... You dishonored my name and your mother's name. And God will charge you for that...”
-TODAY at 4:15 pm
“GOD WILL CHARGE YOU DOUBLE. blah blah blah how dare you do this your mother is so devastated whatever”
btw i was abused my entire life. i was 19 when i moved out and it’s been a year since i did. i moved out because i wanted to live a life where i didn’t have to memorize footsteps
|
depression
|
I came to terms with my issues a LONG time ago. Like, I must have been younger than 10 when I realized “yeah my brain is fucked”. So over the years, I always tried not to compare myself to others too much.
But now, as an adult, HOLY SHIT have I ever fallen behind in life. I can’t even really blame ADHD, or depression, or *anything* besides myself. I’m just… shitty at being a human. And I have zero idea how other people are so good at it.
I’m not even talking about those with financial success or flourishing relationships. I mean anyone who can function like a normal human being on a day to day basis, *especially* when it’s not even like a conscious decision!
Like, working out for example. WHAT IS IT?? Exercise has always been this huge, weird monolith to me, and other people just… do it? Like, EVERY day?? How the fuck do you manage that? How do you engage in an activity that is GUARANTEED to make you sweat, get tired and feel like shit?
I know that “you feel great afterwards” and “it’s all about building good habits” but god, at what cost? How the fuck do you go to the gym (especially if you’re a fat sack of shit like me), have all your muscles SCREAM in agony, and then waltz right back in the next day like nothing happened?
Another thing: HYGIENE. How in the actual fuck do people keep track of that shit? Especially all the stuff that isn’t just basic “shower/brush teeth/comb hair” stuff? I can barely drag myself out of bed and you want me to FLOSS!? Apply MOISTURIZER? WASH MY DAMN FACE? Are you out of your fucking mind?
And for most people, they don’t even give it a second thought. Taking care of themselves comes as naturally as walking. HOW!?
Money is another big one. You’re telling me you can go to the grocery store on the 1st, and be TOTALLY fine with your selections for the rest of the month? You’re not gonna spend $20 at the corner store every single night because a bag of chips is easier than cooking? What is your secret!?!?
This shit is just WILD to me. All of these things take weeks and weeks of preparation and motivation to even *cross my mind*, and yet they’re all supposed to be “easy” parts of my “routine”? WHAT THE HELL?
It feels like I’m building an IKEA desk and lost the instructions. This should all be SO easy, but no, everything has to be a fucking problem with me.
Ugh, if you read this far and happen to be one of those mythical people who have their shit together, please send prayers. I ain’t doin too well.
|
ADHD
|
I hate theft, it shows me that you can't trust someone. He decided that, because he had to get his amazon package from his neighbour's house, he should complain that he never got it and get a second of the item free.
I told him how I felt about what he was going to do. That he was minorly inconvenienced at most and that he should move on.
He tried to make some argument about how rich Amazon is, but I stuck to my perspective and he got pretty mad.
Anyone else really dislike thievery and cheats?
Edit: I'm turning off notifications, it's exhausting listening to people justify what they think is "moral theft".
|
aspergers
|
Hi there, I am a man with Asperger's in my 30s and I was attacked 9 months ago by a group of young men with iron bars, breaking my arm and shoulder.
I have since found out where one of the group live and I almost had a chance to confront him and exact revenge. If I keep going there, more.opportunities will arise.
However because I have thought and even dreamt of such revenge for many months I fear not him but the emotions I will experience when he is finally in striking range.
I fear I will not be able to mercilessly pounce up on him and beat him up without provocation from him. I am afraid of failing and not having that "killer instinct" that NTs seem to take for granted.
Ive noticed I seem to lack it and I am afraid of failing so I find myself avoiding the confrontation even though I need revenge for closure.
|
aspergers
|
i used to get litterally nothing except small stuff punctuated with a few sort of bad stuff here and there until 3 days ago where i had the worst flashback i ever had, and since i can't feel anything else than intense anxiety or numbness, and i've been pretty dissociated the whole time too. can't ever enjoy anything, can't sleep, have memories and emotional flashbacks all day, exc..
wdy think?
|
ptsd
|
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