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91,800
Nick’s there to protect the vice president because the vice president can’t believe what the fuck is going on.”
Nick’s there to protect the vice president because the vice
president can’t believe what the fuck is going on.”
91,801
A CALIFORNIA woman has pleaded not guilty to cutting off her estranged husband's penis and running it through a garbage disposal.
A CALIFORNIA woman has pleaded not guilty to cutting off her
estranged husband's penis and running it through a garbage disposal.
91,802
"You are a sexual predator, a sexual deviant and they should lock you up."
"You are a sexual predator, a sexual
deviant and they should lock you up."
91,803
In a blog post titled, "Yes, John Oliver, we are stupid fucking idiots," North principal Mark Ray decried Oliver's sketch as "brutal," "unfair," and "unjust."
In a blog post titled, "Yes, John Oliver, we are stupid fucking idiots," North
principal Mark Ray decried Oliver's sketch as "brutal," "unfair," and "unjust."
91,804
He's already shared several tracks from the record, such as "Never Be Like You," "Smoke and Retribution," "Wall Fuck," and "Say It."
He's already shared several tracks from the record, such as "Never Be Like You,
" "Smoke and Retribution," "Wall Fuck," and "Say It."
91,805
Let me say something that may not be great politics, but the secretary is right — and that is that the American people are sick and tired of hearing about the damn emails. ...
Let me say something that may not be great politics, but the secretary is right — and
that is that the American people are sick and tired of hearing about the damn emails. ...
91,806
As he puts it, “I just felt like I needed to do some sort of pre-midlife crisis bullshit.”
As he puts it, “I just felt like I needed
to do some sort of pre-midlife crisis bullshit.”
91,807
The hacking is helpful, but Crooked Hillary is all over me about this stupid tape.
The hacking is helpful, but Crooked Hillary
is all over me about this stupid tape.
91,808
"Take it to a fancy designer shop and get some rich guy with a credit card to buy it loads of ugly shoulder-padded jackets so it stops looking like a prostitute and now looks like Ivana Trump.
"Take it to a fancy designer shop and get some rich guy with a credit card to buy it
loads of ugly shoulder-padded jackets so it stops looking like a prostitute and now looks like Ivana Trump.
91,809
These band names aren't as laugh-out-loud idiotic as some of the others we'll get to-in fact, several of our staff admitted that Porno for Pyros was actually a pretty cool name.
These band names aren't as laugh-out-loud idiotic as some of the others we'll get
to-in fact, several of our staff admitted that Porno for Pyros was actually a pretty cool name.
91,810
Fans held up profane banners and a giant inflatable penis in an attempt to unsettle Leksand defender Jan Huokko.
Fans held up profane banners and a giant inflatable penis
in an attempt to unsettle Leksand defender Jan Huokko.
91,811
The bastards on the Judiciary Committee allowed rove to testify without being sworn under oath.
The bastards on the Judiciary Committee allowed rove
to testify without being sworn under oath.
91,812
In actual fact there is an online community dedicated to abstaining from masturbation and pornography.
In actual fact there is an online community
dedicated to abstaining from masturbation and pornography.
91,813
Hello, there should be more advice about dealing with depression when you're stupid and worthless, so here is a self help exercise.
Hello, there should be more advice about dealing with depression when you
're stupid and worthless, so here is a self help exercise.
91,814
"If you move — — [expletive], I will shoot you," Ruetting warned him, according to Alzaidy.
"If you move — — [expletive], I will
shoot you," Ruetting warned him, according to Alzaidy.
91,815
On the shaft of the penis, Fordyce spots are more visible when the skin is stretched, and may only be noticeable during an erection.[
On the shaft of the penis, Fordyce spots are more visible when the
skin is stretched, and may only be noticeable during an erection.[
91,816
They're the guys out there smashing your shit in as you try to create disruption to make them react so you can try to say your prediction of "what would happen under Trump's presidency" is true.
They're the guys out there smashing your shit in as you try to create disruption to make them react
so you can try to say your prediction of "what would happen under Trump's presidency" is true.
91,817
“He was saying, ‘I’m going to kill you if you move,’” he told the CBS-affiliated KHOU.
“He was saying, ‘I’m going to kill you if
you move,’” he told the CBS-affiliated KHOU.
91,818
We do value our customers but sometimes we get children like you we just have to put you in the corner with your im stupid hat on.
We do value our customers but sometimes we get children like you we just
have to put you in the corner with your im stupid hat on.
91,819
Based on prostrate massager I use, this toy is perfect when you feel like having a prostate related orgasm.
Based on prostrate massager I use, this toy is
perfect when you feel like having a prostate related orgasm.
91,820
You probably haven’t showered for over 30 hours, all the good seats are taken, the food is ridiculously expensive and everyone is in a super shitty mood.
You probably haven’t showered for over 30 hours, all the good seats are
taken, the food is ridiculously expensive and everyone is in a super shitty mood.
91,821
2) Best friend and a doctor girl kill Saya and then main character commits suicide.
2) Best friend and a doctor girl
kill Saya and then main character commits suicide.
91,822
"Women have this idea that we are supposed to not be moody and we're supposed to tamp down that moodiness," said Julie Holland, author of "Moody Bitches" and a psychiatrist who has practiced in New York for 20 years.
"Women have this idea that we are supposed to not be moody and we're supposed to tamp down that moodiness,
" said Julie Holland, author of "Moody Bitches" and a psychiatrist who has practiced in New York for 20 years.
91,823
If you happen to think that Donald Trump is full of shit, well, it seems fate is smiling upon you as a Chinese company selling high-end, luxurious “Trump Toilets” exists to make your bathroom experience great again.
If you happen to think that Donald Trump is full of shit, well, it seems fate is smiling upon you
as a Chinese company selling high-end, luxurious “Trump Toilets” exists to make your bathroom experience great again.
91,824
You can have your fruity Elves, your hackneyed Orcs, your crazy impossible-to-understand fucking time-warping magic spells, and your "high fantasy" ass-grabbery.
You can have your fruity Elves, your hackneyed Orcs, your crazy impossible-to-
understand fucking time-warping magic spells, and your "high fantasy" ass-grabbery.
91,825
When I gave it to her, she took a sip and made a face as if she had just taken a sip of liquefied dog s**t.)
When I gave it to her, she took a sip and made a
face as if she had just taken a sip of liquefied dog s**t.)
91,826
Also read: ‘Game of Thrones': So Joffrey Hates Gays, On Top of Everything Else
Also read: ‘Game of Thrones':
So Joffrey Hates Gays, On Top of Everything Else
91,827
I had a couple of days talking to wardrobe and makeup to get ready to rig the thing that I wore for the ass motorboating.
I had a couple of days talking to wardrobe and makeup to get
ready to rig the thing that I wore for the ass motorboating.
91,828
6 Sep 2016: When they march on the enemy they do not stop until they subdue them, kill them or get killed.
6 Sep 2016: When they march on the enemy they do
not stop until they subdue them, kill them or get killed.
91,829
Instead, she pulled down her pants and showed off her genitals while cursing.
Instead, she pulled down her pants
and showed off her genitals while cursing.
91,830
Ru Anting, aged 56, actually sucks up the water with his nose and then sprays it through his tear ducts!
Ru Anting, aged 56, actually sucks up the water
with his nose and then sprays it through his tear ducts!
91,831
I'm just considering leaving Twitter, fuck them pic.twitter.com/2NZpOPmlo2 — 🇺🇸 Drybones ム🗽💀 (@Drybones5) February 14, 2017 Whi
I'm just considering leaving Twitter, fuck them pic.twitter.com/2NZpOPmlo2 — 🇺🇸
Drybones ム🗽💀 (@Drybones5) February 14, 2017 Whi
91,832
This week, the good pastor released a video in which he warns that Starbucks coffees are flavored with the “semen of sodomites.”
This week, the good pastor released a video in which he warns
that Starbucks coffees are flavored with the “semen of sodomites.”
91,833
Fianna Fáil councillor Trevor Gilligan is following in the footsteps of Michael Healy Rae and Paul ‘Fuck You Deputy Stagg’ Gogarty before him and is making some sweet pop jams for your ears.
Fianna Fáil councillor Trevor Gilligan is following in the footsteps of Michael Healy Rae and Paul ‘Fuck
You Deputy Stagg’ Gogarty before him and is making some sweet pop jams for your ears.
91,834
“After 10 years, the FDI document prepared by the Government is nothing short of being idiotic,” he fumes, “Each recommendation in it is illogical.
“After 10 years, the FDI document prepared by the Government is nothing short
of being idiotic,” he fumes, “Each recommendation in it is illogical.
91,835
This image went up on the IDF's official Facebook timeline, with random Facebook users tagging the picture with names like 'dead idiot':
This image went up on the IDF's official Facebook timeline, with
random Facebook users tagging the picture with names like 'dead idiot':
91,836
Here we go again, they’re calling Trump supporters sexist, homophobic, and racist.
Here we go again, they’re calling
Trump supporters sexist, homophobic, and racist.
91,837
Historically, people think poop (or a bag filled with poop) is gross.
Historically, people think poop (or a
bag filled with poop) is gross.
91,838
Spills have been a source of tension across the Niger Delta, which often erupts into violence.
Spills have been a source of tension across the
Niger Delta, which often erupts into violence.
91,839
It seems very unlikely they're going to find any new smoking guns (insert joke about dick pics here).
It seems very unlikely they're going to find any new
smoking guns (insert joke about dick pics here).
91,840
When Reddit unleashed the internet on a blank canvas earlier this month, they shockingly filled it with collaborative art, rather than crudely drawn dicks.
When Reddit unleashed the internet on a blank canvas earlier this month,
they shockingly filled it with collaborative art, rather than crudely drawn dicks.
91,841
As someone who not only steams, but recommends and offers vaginal steaming to my clients, I think Paltrow is right.
As someone who not only steams, but recommends and offers
vaginal steaming to my clients, I think Paltrow is right.
91,842
Attempting to masturbate and drive proved fatal for Clifford Ray Jones from Detroit
Attempting to masturbate and drive proved
fatal for Clifford Ray Jones from Detroit
91,843
But the moral of the story here isn’t that being a bigtime meth dealer will get your ass thrown in prison for a long time as much as it’s that if you’re going to sell meth, maybe don’t drive around with a Walter White doll hanging from the rearview.
But the moral of the story here isn’t that being a bigtime meth dealer will get your ass thrown in prison for a long time as
much as it’s that if you’re going to sell meth, maybe don’t drive around with a Walter White doll hanging from the rearview.
91,844
Asian-Americans, like Jews, are indeed a problem for the “social-justice” brigade.
Asian-Americans, like Jews, are indeed a
problem for the “social-justice” brigade.
91,845
We're also making the difficulty curve smoother and more gradual.We've added a bunch of new powerups, some do some crazy ass shit.
We're also making the difficulty curve smoother and more gradual.We've
added a bunch of new powerups, some do some crazy ass shit.
91,846
The friend was allegedly asked by Piotrowski to perform oral sex on him.
The friend was allegedly asked by Piotrowski
to perform oral sex on him.
91,847
"People say I'm a bit of a gobby twat because I take no shit," he tells me over the phone ahead of our interview.
"People say I'm a bit of a gobby twat because I take
no shit," he tells me over the phone ahead of our interview.
91,848
I hoped that if it came to it, my wife and I would have a way to scare away black bears that frequented our land or if necessary, put an injured animal out of its misery.
I hoped that if it came to it, my wife and I would have a way to scare
away black bears that frequented our land or if necessary, put an injured animal out of its misery.
91,849
But she could give Medusa the power to make sure no man ever laid a goddamn finger on her again.
But she could give Medusa the power to make sure
no man ever laid a goddamn finger on her again.
91,850
An Irishman is relieved and intact after firefighters had to use an angle grinder to cut a metal ring off his penis, a new report reveals.
An Irishman is relieved and intact after firefighters had to use an angle grinder
to cut a metal ring off his penis, a new report reveals.
91,851
Stronger assholes would blow right past liberal accusations of hypocrisy aimed at those who want to pass laws controlling the sexual behavior of the rest of us while rewarding an obnoxious adulterer with a congressional seat.
Stronger assholes would blow right past liberal accusations of hypocrisy aimed at those who want to pass laws
controlling the sexual behavior of the rest of us while rewarding an obnoxious adulterer with a congressional seat.
91,852
I stand in reason with the American Humanist Association" on the front and "Religion is stupid" or "Christianity is nonsense" on the back.
I stand in reason with the American Humanist Association" on the front and
"Religion is stupid" or "Christianity is nonsense" on the back.
91,853
Ted Cruz says "Donald Trump may be a rat but I have no desire to copulate with him."
Ted Cruz says "Donald Trump may be a rat
but I have no desire to copulate with him."
91,854
Coming from the creators of THE HANGOVER, Jon Lucas and Scott Moore, there's little doubt that this college-age version will amount to much more than some raunchy humor and drunken stupidity.
Coming from the creators of THE HANGOVER, Jon Lucas and Scott Moore, there's little doubt
that this college-age version will amount to much more than some raunchy humor and drunken stupidity.
91,855
No one like me as men held me down and raped me in front of a chanting audience.
No one like me as men held me down
and raped me in front of a chanting audience.
91,856
… while giving themselves an aneurism (I fucking hope) from the all the misdirected, judgmental, bigoted faux-rage they’re forcing their miniscule brains to cough up like so much ideological phlegm.
… while giving themselves an aneurism (I fucking hope) from the all the misdirected, judgmental,
bigoted faux-rage they’re forcing their miniscule brains to cough up like so much ideological phlegm.
91,857
US equity futures are tumbling, bonds bid, and gold bouncing off the initial jerk lower.
US equity futures are tumbling, bonds bid,
and gold bouncing off the initial jerk lower.
91,858
When Epshteyn said that more than 50 percent of the country liked their party, Maher spat back, “Well, they’re fucked up, too.”
When Epshteyn said that more than 50 percent of the country liked their party,
Maher spat back, “Well, they’re fucked up, too.”
91,859
For example, this in reference to a student who has difficulty spelling: "[expletive] idiot."
For example, this in reference to a student who
has difficulty spelling: "[expletive] idiot."
91,860
We discovered that Tony—a man who has killed with his bare hands—once dreamed a bird had absconded with his penis.
We discovered that Tony—a man who has killed with his
bare hands—once dreamed a bird had absconded with his penis.
91,861
The students hurled a litany of insults at Peirce, putting up posters that read "fuck your transphobia" and "you don't fucking get it" among other things.
The students hurled a litany of insults at Peirce, putting up posters that read "
fuck your transphobia" and "you don't fucking get it" among other things.
91,862
They all sound like they have sticks up their ass, in a way that I cannot help but think the writers did not intend.
They all sound like they have sticks up their ass, in a
way that I cannot help but think the writers did not intend.
91,863
As reported in Investor’s Business Daily, Lowry went on to say that Mann’s “… going to go to great trouble and expense to embark on a losing cause that will expose more of his methods and maneuverings to the world…In short, he risks making an ass of himself.
As reported in Investor’s Business Daily, Lowry went on to say that Mann’s “… going to go to great trouble and expense to embark
on a losing cause that will expose more of his methods and maneuverings to the world…In short, he risks making an ass of himself.
91,864
Four teachers allegedly raped her on the roof of the building, the Hindustan Times reports.
Four teachers allegedly raped her on the roof
of the building, the Hindustan Times reports.
91,865
Sure enough, Indy agrees to "get a hold of the Ark before the Nazis do," and kick as much Nazi ass as he can along the way.
Sure enough, Indy agrees to "get a hold of the Ark before the Nazis
do," and kick as much Nazi ass as he can along the way.
91,866
Now we learn of gay informants telling American forces about their abusive Al Qaeda lovers.
Now we learn of gay informants telling American
forces about their abusive Al Qaeda lovers.
91,867
If I have learned anything in my life so far, it’s that the only group of people more obsessed with touching a penis than gay men is straight ones.
If I have learned anything in my life so far, it’s that the only
group of people more obsessed with touching a penis than gay men is straight ones.
91,868
But we still have enough idiots to reach a tipping point where things are being ruined for the rest of us.
But we still have enough idiots to reach a tipping point
where things are being ruined for the rest of us.
91,869
“People want to believe we’re a bunch of sad, pathetic losers who can’t get laid and are just bitter because our wives left us,” Esmay explains.
“People want to believe we’re a bunch of sad, pathetic losers who ca
n’t get laid and are just bitter because our wives left us,” Esmay explains.
91,870
The boy said Garner then touched him "on the outside of his pants" and made "an attempt to take his shorts off" while offering to "perform oral sex on him."
The boy said Garner then touched him "on the outside of his pants" and made "
an attempt to take his shorts off" while offering to "perform oral sex on him."
91,871
Instead, I endlessly rewatch Curious George and those fucking Minions movies.
Instead, I endlessly rewatch Curious
George and those fucking Minions movies.
91,872
According to MediaWatch, "contestants have had their honesty tested on subjects like STDs; masturbation; anal sex; threesomes; and eating faeces during sex."
According to MediaWatch, "contestants have had their honesty tested on subjects like STDs
; masturbation; anal sex; threesomes; and eating faeces during sex."
91,873
And this time, he was able to talk about HBO without calling the company's CEO a "bitch."
And this time, he was able to talk about HBO
without calling the company's CEO a "bitch."
91,874
"When he was running, he said 'I want to kill more people, I want to kill more Muslims,'" he said.
"When he was running, he said 'I want to kill more
people, I want to kill more Muslims,'" he said.
91,875
Knowing when to say “fuck it” at the right time, to the right people, is a skill.
Knowing when to say “fuck it” at the right
time, to the right people, is a skill.
91,876
An Asian father-of-four dragged a young pub worker off the street and raped her for three hours saying 'you white women are good at it'.
An Asian father-of-four dragged a young pub worker off the street and
raped her for three hours saying 'you white women are good at it'.
91,877
[Person behind camera: (sobbing incoherently with laughter) it’s so…. ffffunnny…. ohheheheheh…. (sniffing, snorting, laughing) of all the shit you can find….
[Person behind camera: (sobbing incoherently with laughter) it’s so…. ffffunnny….
ohheheheheh…. (sniffing, snorting, laughing) of all the shit you can find….
91,878
Muslims are prohibited from touching or consuming bacon and other pork products.
Muslims are prohibited from touching or
consuming bacon and other pork products.
91,879
So Trump is a sexist pig … but liberals can totally turn men into sex objects.
So Trump is a sexist pig … but
liberals can totally turn men into sex objects.
91,880
Behold, you and your puny little life and your minuscule little salary and tiny little human skeleton are mere scraps, crumbs, dust mites on a dog when compared to this giant petrochemical stud.
Behold, you and your puny little life and your minuscule little salary and tiny little human skeleton
are mere scraps, crumbs, dust mites on a dog when compared to this giant petrochemical stud.
91,881
Plymouth Rock didn't land on me, I slathered it in Cool Whip and cranberry sauce and chowed down on that motherfucker.
Plymouth Rock didn't land on me, I slathered it in
Cool Whip and cranberry sauce and chowed down on that motherfucker.
91,882
Police said the suspects who abducted him fled with his severed penis so that it could never be reattached.
Police said the suspects who abducted him fled with his
severed penis so that it could never be reattached.
91,883
The naval have targeted the children with the full intention to kill them without mercy.
The naval have targeted the children with the
full intention to kill them without mercy.
91,884
One does not simply say that to the Lord of the House of Lannister without having big cojones.
One does not simply say that to the Lord
of the House of Lannister without having big cojones.
91,885
The Motley Fool Canada » Dividend Stocks » Is Alaris Royalty Corp.
The Motley Fool Canada » Dividend
Stocks » Is Alaris Royalty Corp.
91,886
A man without a penis has had sex with more than 100 people, while somehow managing to conceal the fact that he's missing the critical organ.
A man without a penis has had sex with more than 100 people,
while somehow managing to conceal the fact that he's missing the critical organ.
91,887
o I immediately had him pegged as a troll, but I asked him why expecting a "lol because it sucks" reply. I
o I immediately had him pegged as a troll, but I asked
him why expecting a "lol because it sucks" reply. I
91,888
After Biden kicked ass in the Veep Debate, some conservatives were posting stuff like, “Sorry to burst your bubble, but Republicans see it differently.”
After Biden kicked ass in the Veep Debate, some conservatives were posting stuff like
, “Sorry to burst your bubble, but Republicans see it differently.”
91,889
I will smack any male whom you decide to smash against his pelvis – after I first knock you on your butt for forgetting how a lady acts in public.
I will smack any male whom you decide to smash against his pelvis – after
I first knock you on your butt for forgetting how a lady acts in public.
91,890
We are literal idiots from New York City who don’t know a goddamn thing about NASCAR.
We are literal idiots from New York City who
don’t know a goddamn thing about NASCAR.
91,891
When he meets Maher again, Brady said, he’ll be that “stereotypical black dude” for him “and I will beat your ass in public.”
When he meets Maher again, Brady said, he’ll be that “stereotypical
black dude” for him “and I will beat your ass in public.”
91,892
It began with the fresco of a giant, wrinkly dick in the town of Saint-Gilles, which showed up in mid-September.
It began with the fresco of a giant, wrinkly dick in the
town of Saint-Gilles, which showed up in mid-September.
91,893
Boehner’s suggestion that the Senate get off their ass while he remained on his “seems like the height of hypocrisy, ass-wise.”
Boehner’s suggestion that the Senate get off their ass while he remained on
his “seems like the height of hypocrisy, ass-wise.”
91,894
Even the most casual city observer would call utter bullshit on that.
Even the most casual city observer
would call utter bullshit on that.
91,895
Hey, he's not the company I'd choose either.I've been working on this little jerk for a couple of months now.
Hey, he's not the company I'd choose either.I've
been working on this little jerk for a couple of months now.
91,896
Away from its sparkling coastal cities and picturesque natural wonders, California hides its massive, steaming pools of literal liquefied shit.
Away from its sparkling coastal cities and picturesque natural wonders,
California hides its massive, steaming pools of literal liquefied shit.
91,897
(He told Esquire in 2005, after his divorce from Angelina Jolie, that sleeping with “the ‘sexiest person in the world,’ may be literally like fucking the couch.”)
(He told Esquire in 2005, after his divorce from Angelina Jolie, that sleeping with “
the ‘sexiest person in the world,’ may be literally like fucking the couch.”)
91,898
All he had to do was care a little and pick up the god damned phone.
All he had to do was care a
little and pick up the god damned phone.
91,899
Besides being a writer, I’m the worlds foremost expert on precisely just how much I suck.
Besides being a writer, I’m the worlds
foremost expert on precisely just how much I suck.